 Today's webinar is hosted by Jen Harwood. Jen is a recognized business speaker who can touch, move, and inspire an audience to think differently about business and create positive change. Jen's style is energetic and engaging, and I personally can vouch for this as I have experienced it many times myself. She shares real business stories, essentially, and it's all aimed to teach audiences fundamental business principles in an entertaining way. I work with lots of people around networking. I'm based in Sydney, and I travel, and as you can see, I'm starting to work with technology, so that's great. The key to the success that I've had in my entire career and in running my business has been through networking. So I have an advertised, and most people find me to work with them through referral, which is a really great side of networking. I'm an international speaker and an author and a business coach, and I've written a number of books. One of those books is called The Art of Networking. Hence, Redback asked me to come and speak to you guys, and that's available. We can talk about that later. Let's talk about you and some of the things that you guys were talking about, which are really important from networking. So the agenda that I've put together for you today is looking at some of the networking basics. So for those of you that are great at networking and some of the people that have said they've done eight and 15 networking events, this is not new, and I'm not saying that it is, but I want you to listen to this information and ask yourself, how well am I doing this? Or have I stopped doing this because it's the basics? We're gonna talk about networking places and spaces of where you can be networking, conversation strategies, how to start them, and also dealing with personality management, as well as group dynamics and the feedback that a lot of you gave us, we were talking about getting in and out of groups, so we'll talk about that. And also the big one, Remembering Names. So again, we'll talk some strategies there and the questions, ask them as we go. So we've got some polls and there's some questions in there for you guys to answer. So if you've got a burning question and you really need to ask it, just ask it, and Sarah will pick it up and she can interrupt me and we can go from there. Okay, yay. Let's talk about that. Okay, so let's look at the networking basics. So there's a few things that you wanna look at networking basics. And the first one is your intentions. What do you want from an event? All of us are scheduled to go to events and we're either personal events or business events and you've gotta set some intentions. And as you can see from the lady there, her intentions of meet five people, get one lead or have some fun. I don't really care what your intentions are but you need to set them. So we're gonna do a webinar poll of what is your usual intention for a networking event? And over to Sarah, there it is. Do you, who doesn't set intentions? Do you wanna create leads? Is it fun? And if it's something else, if you wanna just say what that might be, that would be helpful as well. So they're all coming in. Okay, okay, that's fantastic. So I really appreciate your honesty. Lots of people don't set intentions. And so the winner is most people are going to networking events to generate leads and that's at 42% but 32% of people don't set intentions. So if you wanna start maximizing your networking activities then you've gotta start thinking to yourself, what am I gonna get out of this? You're gonna spend time, you're gonna spend money, somebody made a comment earlier that networking events cost money, they do. So what do you wanna get out of it? Start getting very clear about what that might be. And to be honest, there's nothing wrong with setting an intention of wanting to have some fun. I don't know about you, but sometimes people get stuck in their office or they're busy after meeting, after meeting. Sometimes it's fun to go and hear a motivational speaker or go to a cocktail event and have a very nice view and actually just enjoy yourself because other people are there to do the same thing. Okay, fantastic, so thank you for that. So the next thing is looking at wearing your name badge. Now, some of you are gonna roll your eyes going, duh, Jen, that's obvious. Well, no, it's not. A lot of the time people don't wear their name badge or as you can see on the image there, some people wear their name badge slung down on their jacket or swinging down low. Your name badge is there to help everybody else interact with you. People are gonna do business with people they know, they like and they trust. And if you don't have a name badge on, they don't know your name. They don't have a sense of connection with you because you're nameless. So your name badge is actually not for you, it's for everybody else. And if you think about that when you go to a shop or when you go to a department store, the people have got their names on and that's actually for your benefit so that you know that you're talking to Julie or Steve or Bob. So make sure that you put your name badge on. Again, basic but quite essential. The other one is managing your own day drama. Now, day drama is an interesting thing because everybody has had a big day. I mean, it's only 11 o'clock in the morning and we just had a little drama with the webinar. Now, I could go on about the drama of the webinar but that is pointless. It doesn't create anything, it doesn't move anything forward. You're going to have a day where you go to a networking event and stuff has happened. And you have to be able to let it go and get it out of the way. And again, this is networking basics but one of the strategies that I use is to, if it's something that you need to talk about, then ring your friend up or ring someone in your family and just say, look, I've got to dump, I've got to get this out because I can't take it into a networking event. And the reason you don't want to take it into a networking event is that that will dominate the conversation. And I know all of you have been in a conversation at a networking event with somebody that hasn't managed their day drama and they are boring, they are annoying and they are usually negative. You don't want to be that person because nobody will want to talk to you. And the next time that they see you at a networking event, they will go the other direction. Come on, Faceit, you've gone the other direction when you've met that person. So I've got a webinar question for you around that and that is, what's the best drama you've had to deal with or that you've had or that you've had to deal with? Someone's world or yours. What's the best drama that you've had to deal with? I mean, I had one in an event and a woman stood up and that she'd run over a lizard that day and she was completely traumatised. And everybody in the room within half an hour knew about the lizard that she'd run over on the way to this networking event. She was remembered as the lizard lady. I mean, you just don't want to deal with. Airline woes, thank you, Nabil, staff resigning. You know, the thing is, if you've got drama that's going on in your life and it's too big and it's too much, then, yeah, okay, there's one from Ann Marie, patient's dying. Minister in a panic, thank you, Helen. Having to attend the event, yes, sometimes people are forced to conjole to going to a networking event they don't want to. Payroll issues, people not being paid, yes, staff dishonesty, car broke down on the way to work, yes, thank you, Megan. So you can see that everybody's going to have stuff going on. You don't want to be the person in the room having stuff going on. You just need to park it. So if you can't park whatever the drama is, don't take it into the event. You might not go or you might deal with it and then come into the event because people are going to remember how you made them feel and if you're having all this drama come out, it's not going to be good. So thank you for sharing on that. Okay, I think we'll keep moving given where we are. Fantastic. So let's get to places and spaces for networking. This is one of my most favorite things to talk about because everybody thinks that the best place and space to network is at an industry event. And my favorite place to network is what I call the local spot. Now the local spot is wherever your target market or the people that you want to hang out with, hang out, right? So I spent a lot of time in regional Victoria and one of the places in Bendigo to hang out is a little cafe behind the Bendigo Bank called the Green Olive Cafe. Now I'm there because the type of people I work with are CEOs, bankers and professionals and accountants and everybody in Bendigo goes to the Green Olive Cafe to have coffee and lunch. Charles, Charles W, love the Green Olive, love it, love it. So, and you know, everybody goes there. So the best thing for me to do, particularly when I relocated to Bendigo, I think it was over 10 years ago now, I'd go and have coffee there all the time and I've had lunch there all the time. Now I wasn't there stalking the place, checking out everybody that was coming in and out. Again, people do business with people they know they like and they trust. You want to get to a place where people see you and they're familiar with you. So in the local spot, the place that I would sit would be not right next to the door, but sort of halfway into the room and I'd pick a chair that would face the door because as you know, and it's hard to do this over the airwaves, but when someone walks through the door of a cafe, they look into the room. So as they look into the room, they're going to see me. They're going to see my face. Now I might be in conversation, but I'd rather people see people and they're gonna say, oh, I know you because they've seen you and we want that familiarity of trust and they feel like they know you. So Nabil, you're great. There's a feedback that you can't wear a name badge in a pub or a bar or a cafe. No, no, unless you've come from a networking event, but you want to be seen and that's what the local spot's all about because I've gone up to the counter and someone has come up next to me and it was actually one of the guys that I wanted to talk to and he was the CEO of the Bendigo Council and he came up to me and we stood right next to each other. I'm paying the bill for lunch with one of my clients and he said to me, you're Jen, you're Jen Harwood, aren't you? And I was like, yes, I was dancing in my shoes and this guy knows who I am and I haven't actually formally met him. To get to see this guy was really difficult. I had to get through the switch, I had to get through his secretary to get an appointment. This guy's paying for coffee and he's standing right next to me. And I said, yes, I'm Jen Harwood and he said, I've heard some good things about you. I think we should talk about what we could do with business in Bendigo. I nearly passed out with joy and I was like, yes. And then I said to him, would you like me to call your secretary and make that appointment? He said, yes, call Susie and tell her, John met me today, ring her today, he said. So no sooner did I get out of my meeting and my clients went away. I was on the phone in my car ringing up his assistant and setting it all up, right? So you want to be in the local spot. The other thing too is that the local spot doesn't have to be a cafe or a pub. It might be the gym. It might be, I know in, is it Aubrey? Oh, I do a lot of regional work. I think it's Aubrey or Wagga, can't remember. One of them has a swimming pool. And there's a cafe there and a lot of people go to the cafe at the swimming pool particularly in summer and that's why they all hang out, right? So you want to go wherever your clients are and hang out there and be there, show up and participate. Don't just go once and hope that it's all going to happen. It's about consistently being there because again, people don't want to deal with someone that's there just as a one-off. They want to do business and talk with people that are part of the group. So the next place or space is what I call family and friends. Now, it's an obvious one, but a lot of the time from a networking point of view people have stopped talking to their family about what they do. And there's a number of reasons for that. One, it might be that your family and friends are at the receiving end of all the negative stuff and all the things that you don't want. Oh, are we echoing again? Is the sound not good? No? Okay. And the thing you want to get is that your family and friends are the best people to help your network. What you want to do, thanks, Jo. Thanks, Helen. We're taking the sounds good. Your family and friends want to actually promote you. But most of us haven't taken the time out to really tell them what we do. Now, you don't want to tell them, I'm the manager of blah, blah, blah, or I'm the... They won't understand that. You want to share stories and the benefits of what you've done. So, for example, you... Let me have a look at who's on the list because there's all sorts of people here from associations. You might be talking about... You might be talking about the podiatry association. I'm just picking a name. I won't say who's from the podiatry association. But the podiatry association, what's the benefit of that? Right? Well, we're helping... There's a lot of people that we're helping being able to walk, being more comfortable in their shoes, you know, talking about stories that's actually making a benefit. You know, you've got cystic fibrosis. You've got diabetes, New South Wales. We've got reflexology association. I've just generally picked health associations. There's the University of Sydney. What is it that you guys do? And talk about that and come home from work and say, guess what happened today? You know, I made a difference to somebody or we've just won this contract and it's going to enable this to happen. When you start sharing the benefits, your family pick up on that. Your family pick up on how excited you are, so do your friends, and then they start talking about it. Right? So, you want to start sharing the benefits of what you're doing at work rather than just the details or the problems. And I could talk a lot about that, but I won't. I do a lot of that in a seminar, actually, and get people up and talk about that, but we won't do that here. Okay, the next one is actually industry events. So, a lot of you, 42% of people, go to networking events to generate leads. So, you want to look at who your target market is. And again, that's something, you know, I can help you sort out in your business, is who your target market is and then go show up at their events. And again, don't just show up at their event alone once. If, you know, the event happens every week or every month or every quarter, you've got to be there. And the more prominent you can be and participating and helping people, the more people are actually going to connect with you. So, you've got to show up, but keep going. And the next one is sporting activities or hobbies. So, one of my clients, a long time ago, one of my first clients wanted to generate more leads in his business. And we'll just call him Dave for the sake of the conversation. Oh, yes, in ARRA, the local spot can be an online space as well and a discussion group, absolutely. So, the thing is you've got to keep being there. You've got to keep providing comment. Don't just come in one off to sort of swoop interest. You want to participate and be part of the group. The more you're part of the group, the more people are going to engage and interact with you. So, with my client Dave, you can see there's golf there. He had a packaging business and he was losing clients. And we sat down and we identified who his target market was and his target market because he did packaging for promotional products and new campaigns. His target market were product managers and marketing managers that wanted to do a product launch. So, they would come to him at the last minute with a product and they'd want it wrapped or they'd want it packaged and they wanted it looking pretty. And they needed 300 of them or 1,000 of them because they're running this event and they thought about this at the last minute and they need it in a week. That typically happened and a lot of the time the average spend on this because it was promotion was anywhere between 30, 50, 100 grand. That was great. But the problem was that he needed to get a network and build his business fast because he'd lost some major contracts. So, we sat down one day and worked at his target market and then I said to him, let's look at these advertising executives. They're all aged between 30 and 45. A lot of them are single. And I said, what do they do? And he's like, well, they're all talking about how they went out drinking on the weekend and da-da-da. And I said, well, you could network at the pubs and the clubs, but I don't think your wife would be very happy about that. And he sort of looked at me and going, well, I don't know, that might be fun. And I said, no, no, no, you don't want to do that. Where else are they networking? He said, well, they play and party hard on the Friday and the Saturday night but during the week they play golf. I said, do you play golf? And he said, yes, I do. I said, great, your homework for the next six weeks is to go play golf at least twice a week. I'd love you to do it every day. He negotiated backwards and forwards with me. He ended up playing golf three days a week. He'd go in the morning, so he'd come in, he'd set it up, he got his staff to work on the business areas that he needed to and he went and played golf. Now, in six weeks, he got a tan. He was much more calm, but he's a kicker, guys. He wrote $1.6 million worth of sales because we put business cards in his golf bag, we put product samples in his golf bag and we put him in the place where his target market was. And he didn't have to go out and blatantly talk about what he did because he loved golf, he was in the right spot and he was where his target market was. So again, local spot, putting yourself where your target market is. Online, as Inaro was talking about, putting yourself where your target market is if you can go and be your natural, beautiful, fabulous self and talk about what you do and do it consistently, you're gonna generate leads and get the results you want. Okay, so let's do a webinar poll. There it is. Which would be the best place for you to start networking? Would it be the local spot, family and friends, industry, or would it be good for you to pick up a sport or a hobby and start playing there? What member of your family, if you actually started sharing the benefits and the stories about what you do, would actually start becoming an advocate for it. And sometimes that's sort of getting over yourself and thinking about that member of your family because you've actually got to sit down and explain to them. But I did that with my 86 year old grandmother Polly and honestly, she goes out there and she gets leads from me all the time. You should meet my granddaughter. She still does. She wants my business card with my photo on the back just to brag about how good the photo is, but it generates business. Okay, let's have a look at the straw poll industry. 28, 29%. And that's all right, you've just deleted it off, but I think there are, so it was industry, followed there was some family friends and some local spots. So this was just an exercise to get you thinking about what's possible with that. So thank you for that participation. Yeah, let's look at a good one. Let's look at conversation strategies. And the reason I put this up here is from the feedback that you guys provided. It was all about how to start conversations and around that sort of thing. Now you are going to get this presentation so that you will get the text. I am very aware that the next two slides have lots of text on it. And if I was delivering this presentation in front of people live, you wouldn't be getting this text, but because it's a webinar, it's doable. All right, so let's just get into it. First one I want to talk about is actually how to start the conversation. And the first point is you need to go and stand next to a person that you don't know. Do. All right, that's, I mean, you know, you got a smile on your face, I get it, but a lot of people won't actually even go up and start talking to somebody they don't know, but if you're going to get conversation starting, don't do it with people you know because you'll say the same old thing. The next thing is smile and relax. You do not need an Einstein question to start. And a lot of the time, people feel completely intimidated at a networking event because they need to look clever. Give it up. You just need to ask a simple question. So let me give you some samples. Children's schools are the parents and are fantastic. So you need an open question. It might be, hi, how's your day been? Or why have you come to this event? Or do you know many people here? My absolute favorite is what's the best thing that's happened to you today and I'll describe how that question actually works because it's a get out of jail card for me anywhere, anytime. Another one is what do you think of the speaker of the entertainment tonight? Doesn't matter if the speaker of the entertainment is rubbish. It's something to talk about. Are you a member of the group? What do you do? Is a standard question that most people ask and I would say try to avoid that as the first question because otherwise it's name rank and serial number. Hi, my name's Jen and I'm a motivational speaker and an author. Okay, or hi, my name's Bill and I'm an accountant. The whole conversation stops. You don't want that. So the what you do needs to be secondary or tertiary questions, not the first one, right? Or another one that I ask is what do you do when you're not working, right? And it doesn't matter what they say. I've had lots of people say to me, I sleep. And I go, really? I said, why do you have to sleep? And then with the why do you have to sleep? Then all sorts of other questions comes out. I sleep, I mean, at the moment, none of you really know this, but I have a three year old daughter. If I'm not working and if I'm not networking and if I'm not speaking, I'm probably sleeping because I'm playing with my daughter or I'm sleeping. That's it. But there's lots of stories behind things and you want to ask questions that enable people to share stuff about what's going on. Or another one, where's the best place to go on a holiday? Or I love to travel, do you? Where have you been to lately? Now, if you say I love to travel, do you? And they say no, right? And then you go, I love sport, do you? What do you love? Start talking about stuff that lights you up because people are gonna do business with people they know, they like, and they trust. So you might as well talk about stuff you like and see if there's any connection because if there's no connection that you might love to travel and you might love sport and you might love kids and you're talking to someone who doesn't travel, who doesn't love sport, who is childless, who doesn't want any children, you're probably not gonna do business with them. Probably, right? Because there's not enough connection there. People are gonna connect with you. So then let's look at the other side of things. So you've started an opened up conversation. How do you change it? Has anyone, oh, I can't do a poll because we should have organized it earlier, but now I'm thinking about it. I would be asking who's been in a conversation where it's just boring, it's not where you want it to be. Oh, there we go. Dwayne, I hate getting stuck in weather conversations. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you're stuck in a conversation and you can't get out of it and you want something a little bit more interesting. Okay, so this ties right back to the start of having an intention. If you don't come to an event with an intention of what you wanna get out of it, you're gonna get stuck in these types of conversations. So if you're coming to the event because you want leads, then you have got to have some one-liners that will start that conversation. So let me give you a sample. So strategies for this to either get the conversation more onto your topic of interest, or it's to get someone out of a dull, boring, or a negative monologue, because we all know about the monologue. So for example, have you seen, and then you insert your latest news on your topic, for example. So have you seen the football results, like the waratars? Have you seen something about the Commonwealth Games, or there might be a government announcement in your industry and then ask what did they think? This is something that you would have to prepare in your head so that when you were in those warning, warning, boring conversation happening, that you can kick this one in and run it. Because sometimes it's hard for people and they feel a bit nervous around that. Another one. Again, what's the best thing that's happened to you today? Or for some people that are monologuing a long time, you know, what's the best thing that's happened to you this week? And the other one that I use a lot is state of fact to start the conversation, which will have them asked to know more. So for example, I'd be in a conversation and there was a pause. You've got to wait for a pause and it doesn't matter that this conversation is completely off the topic of the group, right? You just say it. Did you know that two out of five CEOs fail in their first 18 months on the job? I now know why that happens. Someone, someone in that group is going to say, why does that happen? Now automatically, that's going to take you onto the topic that you want to talk about, right? So if you're a mortgage broker, and I think there's a couple on here, I usually say the best conversation to get people talking about mortgages and houses and money is I usually land this, you know, stand in a circle in a group and say, if you could have any house, your ideal house, what would it be? Everybody gets off the conversation or whatever they've been talking about and then they start answering that question because it gets their imagination running and churning and then they start talking about their imaginary houses. From a mortgage broker's point of view, somebody will go, I already know the dream house I want, it's just a matter of when, that's a client. They're not one yet, but that's a client. And another one would say, oh, I'm not sure if we could ever buy a house at the moment, you know, and then you sort of, you can start assessing because your intention is to generate leads, right? Or if you wanted to change the conversation because your intention was to have fun, one of the best questions is, who knows a joke, right? Yeah, if you're going to have fun at an event, you might have a few jokes stored up in your head so that you could actually start it all off because one joke starts to have everybody else talking about jokes because your intention of the networking event might be to have people think you're fun, have for you to have some fun, all right? So let's talk about the next question is, because everybody's been networking, what question has got you the best results? Because the other thing is that I've got, I mean, I could talk a lot about this, but I'm interested in what are some of the questions that have got you the best results in a networking event? And I'll just read them out as they come in. The worst question, oh, it's more of, it's so close that they actually don't even want an answer. They're just, they're talking to you because they want to look good. Or they're talking to you because they're waiting for someone else to come into the room that's more important. So they're not actually listening. I hate that, I hate that. And when they do that, I usually just walk away. And they don't even notice that I've walked away because they're not present. Or sometimes, if they should know better, and I am a speaker and that sort of thing, I will look at them and say, are you interested in talking to me? And they sort of look and they go, yes? And I say, well, are we going to have a conversation or are you distracted doing something else? And that usually sort of gets them back into the conversation or then they politely excuse themselves. But that's not necessarily, in my sense, being aggressive. It's just more of, I'm here listening to you and if you're not going to respect that, then let's just keep going. Nothing personal because I've come with my intentions. My intentions need to be met tonight. So, yeah, ask them straight, Colleen. Thanks, Wendy. Yeah, it is rude when people don't do business with you or they don't look at you. Great. But you want to start with a question and I would suggest what's your intention for the event and also what is the topic that you want people to talk about? Right? What's a good book that you've read lately? Now, if you're into anything to do with publishing, that'd be a great question. So, you know, or, I mean, let's go back to podiatry. I'm not even sure if the podiatry lady's on the, because I can't see the list, but it might be what's the funniest foot thing you've ever experienced? No, that could go anywhere. You know, reflexology. What do you do to relax? You know, we're talking about reflexology, we're talking about, you know, those sorts of things. So, get them on your topic. All right, next one. Let's look at personality management. And this is important because a lot of you actually talked about difficult people and also the shy people. So, I put a whole series of images there. The first, you know, group of girls is the clique. We all know about the clique. I mean, networking is very much like schoolground politics when we're at primary school. There's all the groups. So, you've got the clique of girls or guys that don't let anybody in. And part of the strategy I'll talk about in groups, you've also got the angry, bossy, dominating individual. You've got the nice guy, right, or the nice girl. You've got the boring person that, you know, if you stand next to you for too long, you're gonna go to sleep. You've also got the angry woman. So, it's a bit like the guy above her. And then you've also got the person that is very focused. So, they're high, they're in the personality profile. They're high D, they're highly driven. They know what they want. They'll come up to you and they'll ask you a couple of questions and then they go. And for some shy people, that is completely and utterly intimidating. So, you've gotta understand the type of personality that you've got yourself. Whether you're shy, I say to shy people, just be shy. You don't have to go out there and be a gregarious in your face, hi, how are you? But you do need to realize that there are other people out there and to get into the same tone as them. So, the high energy, fast paced people don't like to slow down. So, you might wanna amp it up just a little bit just so that you can connect. Cause people are gonna do business with people they know, they like, and they trust. A quiet, slow person talking to a loud, noisy person. The loud, noisy person might need to slow it down and be a little bit quieter. And at the same time, the quiet sort of slow person might need to speed it up just a little bit and be a little bit louder. Because your intent is to connect, right? Rather than to disconnect. But the best thing to start anybody off, which is my absolute favorite and let's talk about it, is what's the best thing? So, here's what you do. Whoever it is, right? The quiet people who aren't talking or the really loud people that are talking all the time, you wait for a pause in the conversation. For the quiet people, that'll be easy. For the loud people. For the loud people, you sometimes have to wait for them to take a breath. And in that moment, you then say, so, what's the best thing that's happened to you today? And then pause, let them think about it, right? And for the noisy loud people who are talking 100 miles an hour, they probably don't even hear that question because they're too busy talking, wait, and then ask it again. And then allow them to tell you whatever that is. So, what they'll do is it's, I'm not an NLP person, by the way, guys, but I've watched, they go into their brain, they scan their brain for the day or the week, depending on how you've asked the question. And then they'll come back and they'll tell you something. And that thing is related to them. So, whatever it is that they say, you go along with it. Now, the best place to do this is at a checkout, just to practice. Go to the checkout, buying your groceries. Everybody buys groceries, right, unless you're doing it online, but people just still go to the supermarket. And you go up to the person, and I usually do this, I'll go, hi, Sally, my name's Jen. I'm gonna be your customer today. Now, it might sound a bit corny, but it just sort of warms them up a little bit to go, I'm not your usual customer, and to have a conversation, because most people are in the monotonous, scanning things through, hi, how are you? Have a nice day, and there's no interaction. Same thing at a networking event. So you ask them, what's the best thing that's happened to you today? They will scan their brain, and then they look directly at your eyes, and then they'll say what it is. So, at a supermarket, I've had one lady, she said, oh, I saw my daughter take her first steps this morning. Great, my question, how old is she? What's her name? Does she have any brothers and sisters? Do you work here full-time? It opens up the opportunity to ask questions. So you're angry people, and you're full-on people, have to slow down and stop, and then you can ask them about what's going on. When you're asking the questions, you are then starting to lead the conversation. You're more in control of where it's gonna go, but you allow the freedom for the other person to give you the comments back. Another one that I did for a lady, and again, she was in the checkout, she was an older lady, I was about three o'clock in the afternoon. She looked at me with a ripe smile when I asked her this, and she said, my husband made me lunch for the first time in 20 years. I'm like, wow, what happened? What did he do? What did you do? Tell me the story. In a networking event, you do this with people, they then start to open up to you and share stuff that's not name, rank, and serial number. They will then share with you information about themselves and what's important to them and what they like. And you wanna connect with what they like. So this is also very good, by the way, for anyone that has teenagers who come home and say, how are you? Oh yeah, what'd you do today? Nothing. Dead boring. You can actually say to your teenagers, so, Toby, what's the best thing that's happened to you today? They have to answer. Now they can say not much, but the brain will come back. So we've got a question around that. Oh, as I said, it gets people into a lighter headspace and it takes a conversation somewhere new. Dealing with personalities, don't make them wrong. If they're not like you, that's good. You just need to either step it up or tone it down because your intention is to connect with people so that they wanna do business with you. So the webinar poll. Who could be the best person that you could actually ask the best thing to? Would it be your boss? Is there a difficult person that you know? Oh yes, difficult people. Great. Is there a teenager? Or is there someone else that you could ask this question to? You might have a client or someone that you really wanna get a result with. Asking that person what's the best thing that's happened to you this week takes it off the work. It takes it off getting something from someone and it gets you interested in them. It gets them thinking about and creating a relationship with you that's not about the task and it's not about getting somewhere. And when people aren't thinking they're getting somewhere then they're likely to give. Oh wow, look at this. So we've got 60% saying difficult person. 13% of you have got a teenager you can try this with and then there's 25% that have said other. Do we know what other people have said in that or have they just ticked other? Oh, that's okay. I'm just excited as you can tell. Other equals everyone, thanks Colleen. Okay, now I'm conscious of the time. So let's keep moving because we wanna talk about groups. So let's look at group dynamics. So the first thing and this is what a lot of you were talking about early up when the sound was a bit crazy so let's talk about it. Moving into groups, as you can see my guy there I really like him sort of doing the high dive into the group. Getting into the group is really easy and if I was doing this at a seminar I would actually get some people out of the audience so that we could physically do this. So I was sort of thinking about how on earth am I going to describe this? But I will give it a very good go. The first thing you wanna do is that in circles, when people stand around in circles there's gaps, okay? So if there's a group of five people there is gonna be a bit of a space between those five people and some people are gonna be standing closer but there will be a bit of a gap and it might not be a whole body gap. It might be, I don't know if you put your two hands in front of you and sort of put them apart it might be half a body width. What you wanna do is you wanna stand in that gap so go up to that group and stand in that gap. You won't be able to get right in because you'd be knocking shoulders with the people in the group. You just stand back and then the normal sway and body rock of a group the two people on your right and left will actually take a step back and make that circle a bit bigger, all right? And then a lot of the time people go, oh if I go to a group I have to say something. No, no, no, just stand there. Listen to the conversation. Someone's gonna be sort of not controlling the conversation but saying something and others are going to be listening. So just listen and at some point say something relevant. Now I've actually, no seriously, I've actually gone into a circle, stood there, listened to the conversation for about five minutes and stepped out. I didn't say anything. And it wasn't that there was no opportunity to do that. I was listening to the conversation and I'm like, I don't need to be in this conversation. These guys are right into it. I don't need to be part of that. Colleen, you've said creepy. No, no, no, it's not because the group is actually engaged in that conversation and all you're doing is joining. Most of the time, because it's a networking event and a lot of you guys are networking at industry events, people will want to involve you. The hardest part is walking up and doing it in the first place. It might be creepy on the inside because you feel like you're intruding. That is all of us being trained to be good boys and good girls, to not interrupt and to stand back and don't speak when others are speaking and all of those things that we're trained as little kids. So you won't notice it. Oh, thanks Jackie. I would think that it was weird if someone did that to me. When you're in these groups, it's actually not that weird. The hard part is the courage of the person coming up and standing there. So the next part of this is then getting out of a group. You're stuck, you're trapped. Oh my God, I'm in this group. How do I get out of it? And the first thing I say is leaving actually can be really simple. Just you don't need to use excuses to get out of the circle. So a lot of the time people say, oh, excuse me, I think I need to go to the bathroom. I'm like, don't say that. And sometimes people say, oh, would you like a drink? Knowing they're not coming back to the group. So the offering people they're standing with to get a drink, knowing they're not going to come back. Oh, Ann Marie, that's clever. So she's made a comment of going into the group. So you go and stand there and stand in the circle. And then Ann Marie said, then ask what the weirdest thing that you happen to them, what happened to them today and see if you can get their vibe. Oh, I think that's pretty funny. So it's just being yourself. But getting out of a group, don't use excuses. The easiest thing you need to do is step out of the circle. Now again, imagine standing in the circle and just taking a small step back. You've actually disengaged from the circle. Now in a large networking event, there's lots of little circles of people talking everywhere. A lot of the time, as I've said there, all you have to do is turn around. And if you turn around, you're in another group. You don't actually have to move too far. The third point is if, and this is really, if you can get this, in fact, if you take your hands and clap them together and hold them together and then take your top, all your fingers and just keep your palms together, but pull your fingers out. You've got sort of a V going on. The pace of your palms are together. And you've got a V. If you put that up, that is the angle that people, that you can look at when you're talking. You can actually only see in your eyesight two people at once, right? So with that V, if you put it right up, I mean, you know, you probably all look really silly doing this, but, you know, I can't see you and you can't see me. Can you turn me on? Oh, forgive me, everybody. Can we put the video on? Oh, I have to say yes to that. Okay. Hi. So like this, this far, right? You can't see anyone over here and you can't see anyone over here. It's just here. So when you're in conversation, two people, you can only have two people in your eyesight. Everybody else in the circle, you can't see. So when you are in a group, if you're not in the receiving end, like, oh, I can't do it, receiving end of somebody asking you a question and you're not in eyesight, you can take a step out of the circle and you can step out, right? It takes a bit of practice and if I was physically in front of you, I'd show you, but think about it next time you're in a group. You can only see two at a time. Okay, let's get the camera off me. There might be echoes happening. Okay, good. Okay, so in a seated with a group, is it rude not to thank them for their conversation before leaving the table? It depends what the conversation is. And if you got something out of it and it was valuable, nothing wrong with that at all. So it just depends on the context. But a lot of the time when you're standing up and moving around, everybody's moving around. Don't feel like you have to be stationary. You're allowed to move. One of the things that I do with people is, I might say to the person standing next to me, where do you want to go now? Where are we going next? Because people do sort of hang on and want to hang on and be with you. Keep the whole thing moving. And sometimes if the conversation's going really well and you've got someone that's really interested, you want to bam, bam them. Book a meeting from a meeting. So I usually say to people, this conversation's great. I think we can do some beautiful things together. Get your diary out. Let's make a time. Because I need to keep moving and so do you. And they will agree with you. Gemma, what if you're stuck in a one-on-one conversation? Very good. We do get stuck on one-on-one conversations. Again, if it's something you can book a meeting from because it's a good conversation, great. If it's not a good conversation, what I would be doing is saying to the person because you know their name and if you didn't, you could read their name badge. You could say to them, and this is not picking on bills in the world, but you could say to Bill, do you know anybody else in the room here? And they'll probably say no. And you can say, great. Which group are we going to join? And go take them with you. When you go to the group, they'll be standing next to you. They will turn to the person on their left. You will turn to the person on your right and you're now engaged in a new circle. You're engaged in a new group. So you can sort of move that around. I hope that answers your question. Now let's get to remembering names. There was a big lot of questions around remembering names and I thought, well, let's... Oh, you're most welcome, Gemma. Remembering names. So let's get into it. Who's forgotten an important person's name at a critical moment? Who forgets names all the time? You've got three choices. Yes, heaps. Once only... Oh, me, Joe! My issue is that no one can pronounce your name and I don't even know how to pronounce your name. I hate you. I hate you. Okay. So, okay, let's go back to the poll for a minute. So yes, heaps. Okay, we have a clear winner here. 84% of the people forget people's names all the time. 9% only once and there are some stars in the group that never forget people's names. I'm in love with you. But it's a human thing to remember names. So let's... I hate you, is it? No, no, tell me, tell me. I hate you. I hate you. I hate you. What I do with names if you've got a tricky name and I had a woman that worked for me, she was an excellent PA and her name was Suchitra. No, no, it was an Indian name and she was English. I got her to break her name down. So we break it down to Su as in the girl's name Su, Chi as in Thai Chi and Tra as in Tra La La. Su, Chi, Tra, right? A hei gu is the same, a hei gu. Is that correct? You break it down. If you've got anyone that works with you that's got a tricky name, break it down so that they can actually, other people can say it and you will have to teach them. All right, I can't help it. You're gonna have to teach people how to say your name. And if you've got people calling you a name that you can't stand, then you gotta fix it. So the only people that call me Jenny is my sister and my mom. Everybody else, I don't like the sound of it, right? So if people say Jenny, I usually don't nod my head and sort of keep going with it. I say, actually, I really prefer Jenny. You'll get a much better response from me if you call me Jen, right? So you have to manage your name, right? And all of that. So yes, okay, so let's look at remembering names because I'm conscious of the time and I wanna keep it on time. I'm just looking at some questions. Okay, so let's look at remembering names. The first thing is you wanna say their name when you're introduced, okay? And if you've got a funny name or you don't understand their name, get them to pronounce it. So it is really recommended that you help people get your name and do a bit of work upfront because it'll save a lot of hassles later. And then if people can't say your name, then they won't say it because they're too embarrassed to get it wrong. So say their name when they're introduced and then repeat it without being weird, right? So we've got Joe D on the call. So Joe's made a couple of comments and we know that he's in the group. I didn't go, oh, Joe, that's really great, Joe, that you're sharing, Joe. Thanks so much, Joe. Joe, is that short for Joseph? Is it short for Josephine? What is it, Joe? That's weird. You don't want to do that at a networking event either. And I bet you, Joe, is now going to put some comments on there and we'll find out, all right? But you just want to repeat it so that you can start getting it into your head. And then the next thing, this is what I've just done, is you want to say their name in conversation. So we've had Colleen talking before and Colleen made some great comments as well. We're saying their name to help remember it. And that's why you want to wear the name badge to help people remember your name, okay? Then there might be something interesting in person about this person. I'll never forget a guy down in Deniliquin in New South Wales and he had a Mickey Mouse tie, right? And he was just Mr. Disneyland. So it was easy for me to remember his name because his name was Mike and he had a Mickey Mouse tie. So it was Mike, Mickey, Mickey Mouse tie and so it's on my card so that I can, yes, Colleen, your name is easy but there are the names that aren't. So you want to write it on the card so that when I'm flicking through the cards and I'm doing my follow-up, I'm like Mickey Mouse tie, oh yeah, that guy's name was Mike, right? Self-talk. So here's the thing. There's 82% of us that don't remember people's names. You want to stop saying I'm bad at remembering names. You want to start saying to yourself, I remember names the first time I hear them. Now there's a part of your head that's going to go, no, you're not. No, you're not, you're a loser. You forget people's names. But if you keep saying it, you will find that you're actually getting better at it and it's in the car driving there. I'm going to remember people's names today. I'm great at remembering names. And then the last one is, sometimes you won't remember the person's name and what I usually do is they either recognize me or we've met before and I'll say we've met before, haven't we? And they'll go, yep. And I say, I've forgotten your name and they'll go, yep. And I say, okay, forgive me. And they'll say yes because there's three yeses in a row and then they tell me and then I do exactly what's on this list. I'll then go, oh, Susie, thanks very much, you know. Didn't mean to forget your name, Susie. Now, that's not saying it too much to be weird. And then a little bit later, I'd introduce Colleen and Joe to Susie so that I could start doing all of that. If you've got a PA that's next to you, they can start to feed your names as well. And the other one I must give this to you is sometimes I have forgotten names and there's my husband or my friend or my colleague next to me. I might just say, why don't you two introduce yourselves to each other? And in business, that is a ripper because you can then sit there and go, okay. So, hi, my name's Steve, okay, that's Steve. And hi, my name's George. Okay, Steve and George, fantastic. Put it in there because I can't remember anybody's name. So there's a nice little strategy there for you as well. So, actions from today. Because just before midday, so we're almost done the hour. I can't believe I've talked for the whole time. Yay, what are you gonna take from today and what have you learned? And also, what's missing still? Because networking is a big topic. Oh, I'm back on the screen. That's okay, networking is a big topic. And we have some resources available to you today. So, can I go to the next slide? Yep, I do have an art of networking book. Of course, I need to say that to you guys. It's available on my website at genhardwood.com. I do one-on-one work with people who wanna get their networking sorted so that they can actually then identify their target market and increase their sales. So I work with sales professionals to do that as well as business owners. And I also run an art of networking seminar that goes for 60 minutes to 90 minutes where we get the room pumped and everybody gets excited. And it's not a card shark networking of handing cards out left, right, and center. It's about building the skills and the confidence of people to network, people who are experienced and newbies. And that's about all I've got. I just love that you guys all interacted. And if there's anything I can do to help you on your networking journey, please let me know. We have a free coaching service. If you want free coaching to come to us via SMS, if you just send me an email or go onto the website and just let us know, we can put you on there. But yeah, is there any questions? What time are we at? It doesn't say. I'm just going to turn you off and I'm going to come back on now that we've got the mics working. First of all, thank you for everyone persevering with us through the beginning of the event. We just love technology. It just makes our life so much easier. Also, a big thanks to Michael Harris. I'll give him a shout out for fixing this in the beginning. And of course, the wonderful Jen. I think you're amazing. I think you've created so much engagement today. So I'm very, very happy that everyone took part in the session and enjoyed it. Please complete the feedback on the right-hand side. It was Jen's first webinar. So we can tell her how amazing or not so amazing she was. Whatever. And we look forward to seeing you at future events. Also, feel free to put your details in if you do want to keep in touch with Jen. Jen actually runs some networking events with art which I'm yet to attend, especially the female women empowerment. I like to call them. So there's some groups that she holds on the low and all sure as well. So if you want to hear more about those, let us know. Otherwise, enjoy the rest of your day and we'll see you at future events. Thanks, guys.