 GCSE exams start in exactly six weeks from today. Now, if you're a new 11, this is a very real and a very daunting prospect. You have all of these topics to revise for, all of these things that you need to really maximize your Easter revision time for in order for you to feel really, really comfortable come 15th of May when the exams officially kick off. That's in six weeks time so that you can, you know, be on top of English as well as other topics like math, science and so on. However, what I want to show you is how you can make your life much easier when it comes to preparing for your English language, GCSEs and more specifically the English language paper one exam. And what I'm going to be doing in this lesson is showing you how you can write top model responses for question number five of the language paper one exam and more specifically the exam that came up last year. Okay, so this is the exam paper, the scorpion paper that students last year, so students in your position last year sat. Okay, so this is scorpion paper and then question number five, you had the weird kitchen image and also the story was to do with a life saving rescue. Now, remember that when it comes to question number five, this is the creative writing question, when it comes to preparing for this firstly be clear on the structure for descriptive and creative writing and the best way to also prepare for this portion of the exam is literally look at different model responses, different model answers, take, you know, phrases that work really well and discard the ones that don't work really well, but also apply this in practicing different past paper questions. Okay, so what want to do is now show you a model response that I've prepared for the story question about a life saving rescue. And if you want to access some of these useful phrases, I have included a link, a download link where you can also download some of the phrases that I've used with ambitious language and vocabulary for the beginning build up problem resolution and ending paragraphs. Okay, so let's dive into and let's look at the model response that I prepared grade nine model response for the life saving rescue question. So let's dive straight into how to write a four mark model response for the story question which came up in the 2022 summer exams. This is the exams last year. Now, when it comes to writing a story, so I've decided to go for this. Okay, I've decided to go for the story. When it comes to approaching a story like this, I would suggest the easiest approach for any creative writing story is to break it up into five steps. You have your story mountain structure, right where you've got your beginning paragraph. This is where you establish a sense of setting as well as character. Then you build up paragraph is where your character goes in an adventure. It doesn't have to be super dramatic. Then your third paragraph, which is the problem paragraph. This is where your character encounters an obstacle or some issue. Again, it doesn't have to be crazy dramatic. However, obviously, in this one, life saving rescue, there must be some kind of friction that's been created where somebody's life needs to be saved. Right. Then the resolution paragraph. This is now the falling action. The other side of the story mountain. This is where your character somehow resolves the issue. This is a climactic part of your story before you finish off with the ending. Okay, so this is the framework and the structure that I adopt when approaching a story question. And I would suggest going for this. Okay, so make your story really, really simple. And as I mentioned, you can literally download this plan for this story. As well as the phrases that I've used, et cetera, for free in the link included. Okay, now let's have a look at the full mock model response that I came up with for this question. Okay, so starting off with my beginning paragraph and pay attention to the fact that literally I keep the paragraphs quite distinct, quite separate from each other. Okay, this is my beginning paragraph when establishing a sense of setting a sense of mood, and I'm also introducing the character. Long vaulting rays of sunshine fell across the towering pine trees. I'm starting off with pathetic fallacy. Remember, you need to use things like pathetic fallacy. Similarly, alliteration, all of that to bring your writing to life, language and structure techniques. Slowly traveling and wandering, the shafts of warm light illuminated the emerald bushes, the ruby roses and the thick carpet of grass that stretched onwards and outwards. Breathing in and out, I smiled. Ah, sighing in relief, my eyes roamed. They roved. Looking across the magnificent cluster of tall trees, I smiled as I craned my neck upwards and gazed at the turquoise sky. The crisp cold winter had given way to a beautiful barmy spring. Gone were the days of winter coats and thick socks, which I always layered on when I went on my favorite run through the woods setting. Birds twittered and chirped, bees buzzed. Squirrels scurried up oak trees as I leisurely walked through the serene forest. What have I done here from my beginning paragraph? Okay, so this is the first paragraph in the beginning of my story mountain. I've established a very clear sense of setting. I've described all the trees, all these woods, only to later then show, okay, I am in the forest, I'm in the woods, okay? I don't straight away say, Oh, I'm in the forest. I do this indirectly. This is what teachers always say, show not tell you do it indirectly. And how do I do that? I use lots of listing emerald bushes, ruby roses, thick carpet of grass. Also, if grass is a carpet, that's a metaphor. I use also a mix of long and short sentences, as well as as you can see here on a matipair. So from the opening, I'm starting off really, really strong because I'm front loading a lot of these techniques. I'm adding lots of language, but also lots of structure, okay? Already, my examiner is thinking, wow, okay, this person kind of clearly understands what the assignment is, and they know what they're going. So let's look at the buildup paragraph. This is the adventure, I embark on an adventure. Growing warmer and warmer, I tugged my ivory hoodie and take it off, leaving my maroon t-shirt on, tying it around my waist. I broke into light split sprint, squelch, squelch. The damp earth groaned beneath my weight as I stepped over dead twigs, which mingled with tiny lime shoots that spouted from the ground, okay? They sprouted from the ground. Huffing and puffing, I ran past clusters of blossoms, inhaling the forest's fresh earthy scent. My heart thumbed like a loud drum in my chest. My daily exercise was both exhilarating and challenging. Some days I could only walk. Other days I ran as quickly as a cheetah. It all depended on my mood, yet today would be my day. Stepping forward, I continued my jog. One, two, one, two. My feet stamped the earth growing faster and faster. Now again here in my build up paragraph, I'm basically saying I'm in the woods to go jogging, okay? And once more, what I'm doing is I'm using lots of techniques. I'm also using sensory language, okay? So for example, when I talk about what I can smell, okay, the fresh earthy scent, I'm really bringing lots of also sight, sound, taste, touch, feels into my paragraphs, okay? So you need to bring all the fields, all the different techniques within your paragraphs to bring it to life, all right? So that's the build up paragraph. Here's the problem. This is the issue that I encounter. It needs to still build up to the keywords in the question, which is I need to somehow find myself in a lifesaving rescue. Circling past an ancient mulberry tree, my hazel eyes were drawn to a dark hole in the ground, okay? Now this darkness contrasts the sunshine at the beginning of my story, okay? So I started off with all this promise, all this positivity, oh, it's really nice, it's really sunny. Now, my problem, I'm hinting, I'm dropping little hints to show that we're getting closer to a problem. There's darkness. The ancient tree leaned forward. It seemed like it was staring straight into the dark abyss in the ground. Just then, I heard a whimper, then a sob, then a cry. What was happening? Jogging closer to the tree, which stood in a small clearing, I noticed the sobs growing louder and louder. Was I hearing things? My eyes narrowed as I slowed down from a jog to a walk. Stopping for a few moments, I strained my ears to listen. The whimpers continued. It must be coming from what, from that hole in the ground. Drawing closer and closer to the hole, my shoulders tensed and rose up. No one usually came this far out in the woods. Drawing closer to the edge of the hole, I leaned in and looked down. The mud stained face of a young girl looked back up at me. I've built up the tension. I've said, okay, I'm getting closer, I'm getting closer. Again, this is also a good example of how, even if it's something to do with like a life-saving rescue, which can be quite dramatic, it's, you can still kind of have a slow build up. You don't have to have like loads of fireworks and so on. I'm just describing simply seeing a hole, jogging closer to this hole because I can hear whimpering, so I'm using lots of I look inside the hole and I see a young girl with, you know, her face seems muddy. She seems obviously to have fallen in. Okay, so now this is my resolution. This is how I'm starting to solve this problem. And again, I'm not losing sight of the fact that it needs to be about a life-saving rescue. My heart stopped. Was I hallucinating? Blinking rapidly, I stared down. Sure enough, the wide, petrified eyes of a young girl stared back at me. Her face contorted into a frown before she burst into tears. She sat helplessly on what looked like a carpet of decaying leaves. One of her legs was twisted at an odd angle. I had to do something. Quickly unfurling my hoodie, I ran to the mulberry tree and held onto its gnarled branch, which pointed directly into the hole. Clutching the branch with my right hand, I gingerly stepped to the furthest edge of the hole and lowered the hoodie with my left hand. So now here, what I've decided to do and what I've added, so I added this hint early on in the story, where I was running and then I took off my hoodie, my jumper tied it around my waist. Now this is the hoodie which I'm going to lean, clutching onto the tree with one hand, I'm putting the hoodie down so that the girl obviously holds onto it. Obviously this girl needs to be rescued. This is a life-saving, husky story after all. Here's now the ending. The girl sob stopped as she watched me lower one arm of my jumper into the hole. Sitting up, she began to reach her hand out. Stretching and stretching, she watched my jumper go lower until it touched the muddy tips of her muddy fingers. Clasping the edge of my hoodie with both hands, she hugged the jumper close to her. Feeling her weight, I pulled and heaved. Growning whilst holding onto the mulberry tree's branch for support, I tugged at my hoodie. Although it felt like a stone was dangling on my jumper, I could feel her lifting off the ground. I pulled with all my might. Slowly walking back, I tugged and tugged. After what felt like an eternity, the tiny, slender body of the girl emerged. Sliding across the forest's floor as I pulled her away from the hole, her gaze never left me. Her eyes were wide, stunned. My heart swelled with pride when I realised that I had saved this helpless child's life. Again, I've ended by saying yep, I've saved their life but I've actually still done showing not telling, right? Because all of this, especially my final paragraph, I've described literally pulling her out of this hole and also pay attention to the fact that I've used a mix of long sentences and also simple, even one-word sentences to make the pace slightly slower but then also faster. Remember, if you have short sentences, it speeds up the pace of your writing. If it's longer sentences, it slows it down, okay? So when it comes to the story, this is basically a story that boils down to, go back to the life-saving rescue question. The story boils down to beginning paragraph, me walking through the woods and about to go for a jog. Build-up paragraph is I start going for a jog. Problem is I see a dark hole and I hear noises. I go in, I go close to the hole and I see a girl who's dropped in, she looks young. Resolution is I take off my hoodie, I lower it down, she grabs onto it, ending is I pull her out. That's literally all that's been described and I would say this is a fairly basic story structure and as I mentioned, your story doesn't have to be more complex than this. What you do need to bear in mind is language and structural techniques. You need to bring to life your story, okay? So I hope this helps and I hope you found this useful in thinking about how to answer the 2022 pass paper exam.