 The Jell-O program coming to you from the stage of the Ritz Theater in New York City starring Jack Benny with Mary Livingston, Phil Harris, Dennis Day, and yours truly, Don Wilson. The orchestra opens the program with My Little Girl. Friends, the next time you plan a meal remember that the right ending is a bright ending. And remember too that one of the brightest things you could possibly choose is a grand Jell-O dessert. Jell-O, ladies and gentlemen, is a rare enticing treat, a brilliant dessert that will lend gaiety and distinction to any meal, and add a fresh colorful note of charm and good cheer. Those six glowing colors are so attractive, so appetizing, they actually make you hungry just to look at them. And those six delicious flavors are all extra rich, supreme for tempting goodness, as refreshing and satisfying as a juicy ripe fruit itself. So tomorrow night make dinner a real winner by serving a radiant mold of clear glowing Jell-O. And when you buy, be sure to look for those big red letters on the box. They spell Jell-O and Jell-O spells a treat. And now, ladies and gentlemen, we bring you a man who arrived here Tuesday morning at Grand Central Station and was greeted by thousands and thousands of his loyal fans. Hi, folks. I'm glad to be here. Our hero then walked out of the station toward the 42nd Street entrance followed by a persistent red cap. Carry your bag, sir. Carry your bag. No, thank you. I told you I'm trying to develop my muscles. Go away. Reaching 42nd Street, our weary traveler hailed a passing conveyance and proceeded to his hotel. I had it right here. Oh, here you are, sir. Hey, wait a minute, you. This transfers eight months old. Not so loud. I'm a movie star. Gee. Gosh, these bags are heavy. We next find our young traveler at his destination, one of Manhattan's leading hotels. This room will be fine. But where's the bathroom? Just follow the arrow. Thank you. And here he is now, ladies and gentlemen, California's gift to New York City, Jack Benny. Jell-O again, again. This is Jack Benny talking, and folks don't believe one word of Mr. Wilson's little fantasy. As a matter of fact, I'm stopping at one of the finest hotels in this town, the Sherry Netherlands. And you have a room with a bath? Don, I have a suite with a bath. And you should see the size of my bathtub. I went down twice before a bellboy rescued me. Talk about a swanky setup. Why, my living room alone is a regular palace and the furniture, well, the furniture is simply exquisite. Nice furniture. How what period would you say it was, Jack? I'm not quite sure, Don. It's either Louis the 14 or early low state. But you can tell that the furnishings are very expensive. I happened to break an astray yesterday and now I've got to play my violin and the cocktail bar for a week. Tips and all go back to the hotel. You can imagine what that astray must have caused. Oh, I can, I can. And there's one thing, Jack, the service in a hotel like that must be simply marvel. It sure is, Don. All of there are times when they're just a little bit too critical. What do you mean? Well, this morning I sent my gray suit downstairs to be pressed and they sent it back with a note on it saying, please do not wear in lobby. My laundry, they just threw away. You know, Don, sometimes I come in. Mr. Benny. Yes. I'm Brown of the Staten Island Bugle. You spill it, we print it. I say. Now tell me, Mr. Benny, what are you doing in town? I'm here for the premiere of my new Paramount picture, Buck Benny rides again. It opens next Wednesday. Oh, cowboy stuff, eh? Are you a real cowboy? Well, you might say that I see. Are you the star of the picture? Well, I see. Now tell me, who handles the love interest? The love interest? Well, the... Can I quote you on that? Yes, if you're a mind reader. Now, listen, young man, I'm very busy right now, so will you please sit down? I'll give you all the information you want later. Okay, okay. Thank you. Oh, Don. Yes, Jack. Getting back to my hotel, you should see... Pardon me, are you Don Wilson, the announcer on this channel? Yes, I am. Well, I don't know what they're always ribbing you about, but you're not as fat as my wife. Listen, listen, Mr. Brown, this is a program we're doing. Nobody's interested in your wife. That's what I mean. She's too fat. Now, look, will you please sit down? We'll get to you later and give you all the dope you want. Okay, okay. Now, Don, getting back to my hotel, the food there is positive. Well, look who's here. Hello, Mary. East side, west side, all around the town. Well, that ought to get me a hand. It certainly did. Well, Mary, it's sure good to be back in New York, isn't it? I'll say it is. What have you been doing, Mary? I suppose you've been seeing a lot of shows like the rest of us. I sure have, Don. And gee, that there's some swell ones on Broadway right now. There are. I saw Dewberry was a lady and the man who came to dinner and Life with Father and Zapoppin. Zapoppin? You know, with Olson and Johnson. Mary, the title of that show is not Zapoppin. It is on the radio. Oh, that's right. What am I thinking of? What else did you see? Well, I saw Jack Haley's new musical, Higher and Higher and Higher and Higher and Higher. What's the matter with you, Mary? The name of Jack Haley's show is just Higher and Higher. Well, I sat in the gallery. I sat in the gallery. What kind of guys do you go out with? I was with you, remember? Oh, yes, I wanted to get a bird's eye view of Haley. I've seen him from every other angle. Oh, what else did you see? Hey, Mary, you told me you were going over to Fred Allen's broadcast last Wednesday night. Did you make it all right? Yeah, it was a swell program. A lot of laughs, huh? Oh, it was a riot. I had more Jack stop pinching me. Well, I told you to stay away from that town hall tripe festival. You're there, weren't you? Only as a spy. I wanted to find out how he gets those big laughs and done what I discovered. Well, this will amaze you. No kidding. What'd you find out, Jack? Well, did you ever notice when you listened to Fred Allen's program over the air, he tells a joke and it doesn't get a snicker and then all of a sudden you hear the audience scream? Yeah, what's the cause of that? He wears breakaway suspenders. When a gag flops, down they go. Isn't that the limit? Why, Jack, you mean to say that his pants fall down? Not only that, he's got applause stamped on the back of his underwear. I'd like to take my dark game up there some night. I'd fix him. Oh, you're a fine one to talk, Jack. Look what you do when the audience doesn't laugh. What do you mean? You open your shirt and make the hula dancer on your chest wiggle. I just did that once when the girl who model for it happened to be in the audience. And I want to tell you something, Mary Livingston. The next time that... Hardly, Miss Livingston, I'm brown on the Staten Island bugle. Would you mind answering a few questions? But of course. Mary, he can wait. Well, tell me, Miss Livingston, what is your impression of New York? Oh, New York. It is so big. And I want to be alone. Now cut that out. Look, Mr. Brown, you can get your interviews later. We have a program to do. When are you going to wiggle the hula dancer? None of your business. I'm not going to do that tonight. It wouldn't hurt any. Oh, go sit down or get out. Now, where's Dennis Day? It's about time for a song. There he is, right over there. Oh, sure. Hey, Dennis. Yes, please. Take a bow, kid. Well, here you are in the big city, Dennis. Been having any fun? Have I? I've been to the Elting and the Apollo and the Gady and the Republic. Wow! Why, Dennis, those are all burlase show. Boy, am I tired from applauding. Now, Dennis, I don't want you going to burlase shows and staying up so late. I promise your mother I take care of you and see that you behave yourself. Well, I want to get circles under my eyes like Phil Harris. I don't care if you do. Imagine a kid wanting to be like Phil Harris. Why don't you take after Don Wilson? Or me? Or me? You stay out of it. Now, Dennis, you take my advice and keep away from Phil. Stick around with me and you'll have a lot of fun. You'll meet girls and everything. Say, Jack, that reminds me. What? Tell them about the girl you were with at the Stork Club the other night. The Stork Club? What was wrong with her? She looked like a stork. Mary, the only reason she was standing on one leg is because I stepped on her toe while dancing. And, Mary, will you please be quiet? That girl's in our audience. She's sitting right there in the fourth row. She is not. She just flew up on the chandelier. Now, will you stop with that stuff? Flew up on the chandelier. Go ahead with your song, Dennis, so we can cut this silly chatter. What's it gonna be? I'm gonna sing a swell number called Last Night's Gardenias. Very good. Go ahead. Wait a minute. Come in. Mr. Benny? Yes. Can you tell me how to get to Ripley? Believe it or not, auditorium. Why, yes. It's just half a block down the street to your left. What do you want to see Ripley about? My hair's got the whitest part in the world. Goodbye. He's right, folks, and that looks like the Boston Post Road with air. Sing, Dennis. Dennis Day. Now tell me, young man. Mr. Brown, I'm still the master of ceremonies here. Now, will you please sit down till after the program? Okay, blue eyes. Well, I can't get mad. They are blue. Alice blue, you might say. Although, at night, they take on a deeper shade. And that chalky face sure makes them stand out. Oh, quiet. Anyway, that was Last Night's Gardenias, sung by Dennis Day. And very good. Thanks, Mr. Benny. Can I leave now? Leave? Why? I got a date with Fifi LaRose. She's a chorus girl. Dennis, I will not have you going out with any Fifi LaRose unless she's got a friend so I can shapper on you. Now, there's a phone out in the hall. See what you can do. Go ahead. Okay. I won't have that kid carousing around alone. I promised his mother. Oh, Jack, who do you think you're fooling? I'm not trying to fool anybody. And where in the world is Phil Harris? I wish he'd get here. Have you seen him, Don? No, Jack, to tell you the truth, I haven't seen Phil since we got in town. There you are, a fine pal. Get going, Dennis. A fine pal. But Phil, he didn't even bother to look us up. Oh, yes, he did. Last night, Phil took me to every hot spot in town. Phil Harris took you out? Yep. We went to the El Morocco Club 18, Leon and Eddie's and the Versailles. Mary, that's pronounced Versailles, not Versailles. I'm quoting Phil. So he took you out, eh? Well, maybe he isn't such a... Dennis, what are you stalling for? Go out and make that call. I haven't got a nickel. Well, here, I will not have that kid going out all by himself. Well, he's got to get me a girl so I can look after him. What are you going to do with that Lulu on the chandelier? Mary, there's nobody up there. Now, keep still. Hey, Jack, here comes Phil now. Oh, so the maestro has arrived, Night Club Joe. Come on, Phil, you might as well get your reception. Not too loud, folks. I'm on the ragged edge. You got a nice hand there. I can't understand it. We're so far from the Corn Belt. Well, Phil, Phil, what are you standing there for? Why don't you take a bow? Jackson, if I take a bow, I'll keep right on going. I don't doubt it. Hello, Phil. Oh, hello, Mary. When did you get in town? When did she get in town? Why, Phil Harris, we were out dancing till two o'clock this morning. Holy smoke, was that you? That was really a blind date, huh, Mary? Yeah, I should have got wise when he put his armor on me and said, gee, Brenda, where have you been all my life? That was definitely a tip-off. Well, I feel you ought to be ashamed of yourself in that condition. You never see me get that way. Now, how about New Year's Eve when you loaned me a hundred dollars without a struggle? That was because my paper hat slipped down over my eyes and I thought it was a dollar bill. Otherwise, Phil, it never would have happened. Pardon me, Mr. Harris. I'm Brown at the Staten Island Bugle. What are you doing in New York? Now, see here, Mr. Brown, I told you to get this interview after the program, and that's final. Okay, blue eyes. And stop calling me blue eyes, even though they are my outstanding feature. Well, sit down. Now, Phil, it's about time for a number, and since we're in New York and broadcasting from a Broadway theatre, I wish you wouldn't husk it up tonight. We have a very large audience watching this broadcast. The theatre is packed. I'll say it is. Gee, look at that dame hanging on the chandelier. There's no one up there, although you could see anything. Now, go ahead, Phil, play something. Hold it a minute. Come in. Hello? Hello. Am I intruding? In a way, you see, we're right in the middle of our program. Well, Mr. Benny, I just came up here to shake your hand. You see, I'm one of your most ardent fans, and I never miss your program. Well, when I read in the paper that you were coming to New York, I said to my wife, I simply must go over and see Jack Benny. Well, here I am. I could just smooth. Oh, come now, pull yourself together, Mr. Mr. Jerk Finkel. The name is Logan Jerk Finkel. Oh, Mr. Jerk Finkel. You can drop the Finkel anytime you want to. Mary, well, I'm awfully glad you dropped in Logan, and I'm happy to know that you're such an ardent listener of my program. Oh, I'm a regular pester around my neighborhood. Everybody says to me, I'll you and your Jack Benny. Well, that's very sweet of you. I'm a little rushed right now, but I do want to thank you for your loyalty to my program. Would you mind waiting till we get through? Well, I'll just run along. But before I go, I, I would like to shake hands with Frank Parker. Frank Parker? Frank Parker isn't with me anymore. Don Bester either? Don Bester. I bet he thinks Georgie Jessel is still with Gus Edwards. Now look, Mr. Jerk Finkel. Frank Parker and Don Bester haven't been with me for years. What's the idea coming up here and telling me you never miss my show? Well, you don't have to get huffy about it. I've been shipwrecked since 1934. Oh, that's too bad. Where were you shipwrecked? In a bathtub at the Sherry Netherlands. Good bye. I'll give anybody $10,000 who can tell me what he came in here for. How'd you make out, Dennis? The line's busy. Well, try again, play, Phil. I will not have that boy stepping out by himself. From a certain picture opening at a certain theater on Broadway and 44th Street next Wednesday night, played by Phil Harris and his orchestra. By the way, Phil, I don't see any familiar faces in this orchestra. Did you pick up all these boys here in New York? Oh, but Frankie, my guitar player, I brought him along from Hollywood. Well, of all instruments to worry about. What did, uh, what did you bring your guitar player along for? He's the only guy in my band that can press my pants. Well, that's all changed. Now, this bunch here look like they can not only press pants, but make them. Now, wait a minute, Jackson. I borrowed these boys from Peter van Steeden. Peter van Steeden? Oh, these are the guys that play on Fred Allen's program every week. Get them out of here. But they're very good musicians. I don't care if they are ever since we began our show tonight, they've been sitting there staring at me. What do they want? They've been waiting for yours to fall down. Well, they're due for a disappointment. I'm a legitimate comedian. Well, Jack, I can't believe that Allen would resort to those kind of tactics to get laughs. Oh, you can't, eh? Well, I'll tell you another thing he does. Every time he broadcasts, he puts on that funny looking false face of his. Well, that's not a false face. Jack, that's his own. Are you kidding? You hear that, Mary? That's Allen's real face. Well, what about it? What about it? I gotta make a picture with him next summer. How am I gonna get laughs? Put an eagle in your toupee. Mary, if you think I'm going into a toupee routine right now, you're crazy. Got other things to do. And now, ladies and gentlemen, I have a very important announcement to make. I can't hang around it all night, Blue Eyes. I gotta get that interview. Now, see here. Tell me, Mr. Harris. What are you doing in here? I'm here for the premiere of my new picture. Buck Harris rides again. Buck Harris? Oh, no, you don't. Now, Mr. Harris, do you handle a love interest? I mean, do you win the girl in the picture? Definitely. That's not true. Now, see here, Mr. Brown, I handle the love interest. I win the girl at the end of the picture. And Phil gets her back in the newsreel. Oh, no, he doesn't. Now, see here, Mr. Brown, you got your interview. Go get out. Okay, Blue Eyes. And stop calling me Blue Eyes. Even though they have been compared to the waters of the Minnetonka. Now, scram, will you? Well, if you don't mind, I'll ask Mr. Wilson a few questions. Oh, no, you won't. Oh, yes, he will. Tell me, Mr. Wilson, what are you doing here in here? I'm here to tell everybody about Jell-O, America's favorite Jell-Oton dessert. Now, look, Mr. Wilson, if my fat wife wanted to buy some Jell-O, how would she go about it? She'd run down to her neighborhood grocer and ask him for a package. Now, how would she know that it was genuine Jell-O? She'd look for the letters. What color letters? Red letters. What size red letters? Big red letters. Big red letters on the what? Big red letters on the box. That's all I want to know. Oh, boy, what a scoop. So long, Blue Eyes. Goodness, he couldn't even wait to open the door. And Phil, now that he's gone, don't you ever say that you're the... Hey, how'd you make out, Dennis? The line's still busy. Well, tell the operator to cut in. Tell her you're a doctor or something and hurry. Take it easy, Minnetonka. Well, oh, to his mother to keep an eye on that kid. Now, let's see where was I. You were talking about next week's attraction. Oh, yes. Next Sunday night, ladies and gentlemen, our program will again originate from New York City. And we have quite a surprise prepared for you. Next week, the mighty Benny Barn players will present their version of... Oh, fine. Hello? Hello, Mr. Benny, this is Rochester. Well, hello, Rochester. It's so good of you to call up. And it's about time, too. What's the matter, boss? What's the matter? Last Tuesday, you got off the train in Harlem and I haven't heard from you since. Didn't you get my postcard from the Dusky Plaza? Yes, I got your postcard, but you're not here on a vacation. You were supposed to come to the hotel and help me. Why, my trunk isn't even unpacked yet. Just kick it. It'll unpack itself. Never mind that. Now, Rochester, there's no excuse for you're not coming to work. Well, I didn't know what hotel you were stopping at, boss. Oh, you didn't. You didn't know where I was living. That's right. Uh-huh. Well, let me ask you something. How could you have sent that postcard to the Sherry Netherlands? Well, come on. Rochester, I want an answer to that question. It ain't really it. That's as I thought. What burns me up, you're always laying down on the job and yet your salary never stops. It never stops, boss, but it sure slows down. Too bad about you. Now, if it's not asking too much, Rochester, when can I expect you? I'd come down tonight, boss, but they're throwing a banquet for me at the Lennox Avenue Social and whatever happens, club. Well, if it's in your honor, I suppose you'll have to go to the banquet. But I want you at my hotel at nine o'clock tomorrow morning. Nine o'clock? Yes, nine a.m. Even if I'm losing? Yes, be here at nine. That's all. Okay. I better hang up now, boss. I'm calling from a phone booth and there are a lot of people waiting to use it. Well, all right. But remember, I don't want any excuses. Get to bed early so you'll be in good shape. Oh, I will. Don't worry. A little more white rock, honey. What? What was that? Uh-oh. So you're in a phone booth, eh? What's this? A little more white rock, honey? Dog, go on. Did I say it? I just point it. I thought I just point it. I thought you just killed a good gag, too, isn't it? Now, listen, furthermore, you're not fooling me one bit. I'll see you tomorrow. Goodbye. Goodbye. Oh, by the way, Rochester, I've been looking all over for my cowboy suit. I want to wear it when our picture opens at the Paramount. Your cowboy suit? Yes. Is it that one with the ten gallon hat in the fur on the pants? You know what it looks like. Now, where is it? Have you looked all over? Yes, I've looked all over. Now, Rochester, where's my cowboy suit? You have it at nine a.m. so long, boss. Imagine that, fellas. Now, he's wearing my cowboys. Oh, Mr. Benny, Mr. Benny. Yes, yes, Dennis. How'd you make out? I got beefy all right, but you couldn't get a friend for you. Oh, well, I better go with you anyway. I will not have you going out with a pretty girl alone. Play, Phil. Here's a delicious new Jello Dessert, ladies. One that you'll be proud to serve and one that your family will be mighty pleased to enjoy. It's called Orange Marshmallow Dessert and believe me, it's something really swell. A rich, colorful combination of golden orange jello and snowy white marshmallow. To make it, just prepare a package of orange jello in the usual way and chill until slightly thickened. Next, fold in two diced oranges and eight marshmallows quartered. Then mold and prepare to be praised. Orange Marshmallow Dessert will score a big success every time you serve it, so get acquainted right away. Tomorrow night, treat the family to Orange Marshmallow Dessert, a grand dessert made of tender, creamy white marshmallows, rich, juicy oranges, and bright golden orange jello. This is the last number of the 29th program in the Current Jello Series and we will be with you again next Sunday night broadcasting from New York City and as Daylight Saving Time goes into effect over some of these stations next week, consult your local newspaper for the new time on your station. If your community is affected, don't forget the change. Say, Jack, what's Daylight Saving Time? Well, Mary, Daylight Saving Time is a sort of, hey Don, you Dennis, come back here. Wait for me. Wait for me. Good night, folks. Next week, Daylight Saving Time goes into effect in many places and this will result in the change of time for this program over some of these stations. Consult your local newspaper for the time on your station. Tonight's music included My Kind of Country from the Fairmount Picture, but Benny rides again. This is the National Broadcasting Company.