 Ladies and gentlemen, Dennis Day. Dennis Day is brought to you by Colgate Dental Cream and Luster Cream Shampoo. Colgate Dental Cream to clean your breath while you clean your teeth. Luster Cream, the Cream Shampoo for true hair loveliness. Dennis Day show with Barbara Eiler, B. Venadera, Dink Trout, John Brown, Charles Dant of the Orchestra and yours truly, Vern Smith is written by Frank Galen and stars our popular young singer in A Day in the Life of Dennis Day. Here's Dennis to sing A Feudan and a Fightin'. And fussin' and a fightin' Sometimes it gets to be exciting Don't lie, it'll be plumb out and neighbors next week Pickin' up the Daisy Feudan And fussin' and a fightin' Big of my heart, I love you This is a wrong that needs a right wing Let's get that funeral service over So then we can start in a Feudan Must remember this A kiss is just a kiss A sigh is just a sigh As time goes by Oh, she poisoned all the nails Now daughter, she had an order At least till she could run like the Deccans They hit it with a shovel Feudan and fightin' and a fussin' No use of standin' here, a cussion Let's give our daughter a pistol Now that she's four and go Feudan Famous beauty authority K. 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Dumit blended gentle lanolin With special secret ingredients To achieve this revolutionary new cream That brings out the rich natural beauty of your hair Leaves it obedient to brush and comb Try that economical dollar jar Of luster cream shampoo sold at all cosmetic counters Also 30 cent and 55 cent sizes And learn what more and more women of all ages Are learning every day The way to new glamour with luster cream The cream shampoo for true hair loveliness And now once again we bring you a day In the life of Dennis Day The story of a lovable young boy In his uphill struggle to become average Last June as you may remember Dennis' boss Mr. Willoughby Decided to close his store during July and August Forcing our young hero to spend the summer Back home with his folks So it's been two months since anyone in Weaverville Has seen him Have you missed her employee Mr. Willoughby? Missed him? Yes Dennis? Yes Hee hee hee hee Oh now Mr. Willoughby, I'm sure that attitude Isn't true of the folks over at the Anderson boarding house Especially his girlfriend Mildred Is it Mildred? It certainly isn't Dennis is a perfect darling My mother and a lot of other people in this town Think he hasn't much sense and no initiative or ambition Well they're the ones who never tried loving him And were just willing to sit back and rely on evidence Oh I take it then that your mother Doesn't quite approve of your boyfriend Isn't that right Mrs. Anderson? Let's put it this way I'm a woman who has always followed the policy Of live and let live But in Dennis' case I'm willing to make an exception Oh my, I'm sure your husband Doesn't feel that way Mrs. Anderson Do you Mr. Anderson? Do you Herbert? I can express my opinion in just two words The same two words I express all my opinions with Yes pupsie I see Well I'm sure our young hero Is fully aware of these conflicting opinions And tonight as he walks down Elm Street From the bus depot or rejoin the Anderson's It must comfort him to know That at least his girlfriend Mildred Hey wait a minute What is this sight that greets his eyes On the darkened porch of the Anderson house? Two figures very close together One indisputably Mildred And the other a man A strange man The figures get even closer together Then separate One leaves the other stays Galvanized into action Our hero sprints forward and dashes up the steps Mildred Anderson Dennis So you're just like the rest of your sex Whenever a fella comes home and finds someone in the arms Of a man it's always a woman I saw you with your arm around him But Dennis And he had his arm around you But Dennis And your lips were puckered Dennis Don't you know you could get kissed that way? Dennis stop being silly Silly that's just how it happens I know from personal hearsay Ha Been counting the days till you'd come back You didn't have to call in someone to count with you Who is this fellow? How long have you been friends? Three days So that's the kind he is I might have guessed Well what do you mean? Only known you three days And already he's letting you kiss him There He didn't let him He just turned around and did it Before I could stop him A likely story my good woman Just remember that two can play at that game I mean besides the two who are playing it already Honestly Mr. Stewart means nothing to me He's just the producer of the summer stock company That's been playing in town I was only talking to him on account of mother Oh sure sure But it's true Don't you trust your own fiance? Our fiance ship is at an end Mildred I bid you good night What? You heard me And I'll thank you to return my boy ranger badge In the morning All I can say is that it's a lucky thing I found this out before we were married Otherwise it would have been a lot more difficult To break our engagement I've told you the truth I have spoken Mildred Dennis you're crazy Even if it were like you thought Surely you'd give me another chance No Mildred No woman's gonna two time me two times Good night Dennis You have all the awful things to happen Darn that Mr. Stewart anyhow If I ever get my hands on him Mildred What a nurse wrong with Dennis He walked right past me without even saying hello Oh it's that darn summer theater director Mr. Stewart He pretended he was showing me a scene And then he tried to kiss me And Dennis saw him Mr. Stewart Oh Mildred did you ask him about me? Mother Dennis and I have split up Don't you even care? Oh yes yes of course Inwardly I'm a mess But life must go on What did he say about me? If it's any satisfaction to you He said you could take Mrs. Green's place You'll be Lady Macbeth on opening night Oh Mildred how perfectly wonderful Wonderful Don't you worry We'll stop by Robinson's Pet Shop First thing in the morning And buy you a cocker spaniel Oh come in Mr. Anderson I just thought I'd drop in and welcome you to Why Dennis you haven't even unpacked I'm not going to Mr. Anderson I'm leaving this place Leaving? Why? Mr. Anderson Suppose you came home suddenly one night And found someone kissing your wife Someone with a will of iron you mean? Yes sir Well that's what happened to me Really? Well still I don't see why you should leave Just because you caught someone kissing my wife It wasn't your wife it was Mildred Mildred? You caught Mildred doing a thing like that? Yes sir Hugging and kissing a man in cold blood I feel pretty bad Mr. Anderson I was looking forward to marriage It's kind of hard to give up my dreams Yes I know Dennis And I'm truly sorry Is there anything I can do? No sir it's nice of you but I want Mildred or nothing No I mean Is there anything I can do to help? After all you can't just give up you know Huh? Well you're going to put up a fight for her aren't you? Where's your masculinity? Where's your virility? You've got the same amount I have haven't you? Yes sir I guess I'm dead Nonsense Don't you suppose I had a rival for Poopsie's hand? But did I stand idly by? No I got in there and fought like a tiger Gee and you were the victor huh? Well it certainly looked like it at that time yeah Oh I see what you mean Now who is this rival of yours? Well I think his name is Stuart The fellow who's putting Macbeth on in the summer theater? Well he's only been in town for a couple of days I know I guess he's just easy to love Well we've got to get rid of it Well I suppose he'll leave when the play closes but that may be too late Yes I'm afraid you're uh Well wait a minute Suppose the play closed after one performance That wouldn't be too late But why would it close so soon? Well what if the critic in the Daily Bugle Gave the show a terrible panning But suppose the critic likes to play? He wouldn't if we had our own critic doing the job Huh? Look suppose a big movie actor came to town And offered the present critic a swell job in Hollywood He'd go wouldn't he? I suppose he would Then there's your answer That's my answer? Sure Maybe I'd better hear the question again Well don't you see Dennis now Look you're good at imitations You can impersonate the star We'll bundle you up in a muffler You can wear dark glasses And the critic will be fooled by the voice Gee and then when we've got him out of town I could write the criticism myself Say it might work at that Of course Now uh uh What movie star can you be? Well how about Ahhhh Are you crazy or something? Somebody who's more dramatic Well maybe Racing with the moon Higher above the midnight blue No No not that dramatic Besides they aren't real actors Now couldn't you be a real picture star? Hmm How about Betty Grable? Dennis all we have to work with is a muffler And dark glasses Yeah that's right I was thinking of wearing a bathing suit But he might spot me Very possible Now I'll tell you what you do Think of somebody overnight I'll be down to Willoughby's store tomorrow To pick you up And we'll call on this critic together Okay Let's see now That's my boy who said that Umbriago A hitty Hitty you are so lovely hitty No My wife's sweetie face Gave me a great big beautiful boobook Good morning Mr. Willoughby Good morning Dennis Well here I am Did you remember this is the day I was to come back to work Certainly Can't you see I'm wearing a black tie Gee You don't change much do you Mr. Willoughby No Well get to work my boy I'll phone the insurance company And tell them you're back And they can raise our rates again Oh yes sir As a matter of fact You'll be in charge of the store today I have to leave in a few minutes For the summer theater rehearsal The summer theater You mean the one that's putting on Macbeth tonight Uh huh Haven't you heard I'm one of the play's principal backers You You've put money into it Five hundred dollars What's the matter Haven't you ever heard Of a businessman becoming an angel Yes sir I may make it before you do What are you talking about Mr. Willoughby Let me ask you a purely hypothetical question If a certain person who shall be nameless Was instrumental in your losing money What would you do I'd fire you in a minute Oh Well in that case I must ask you another question If you were to choose between Love and your career Which would you take Love Sure love You know what men feel For horses, dogs and women And stuff like that What would I know about love I've been married for 15 years Oh I see But I guess if I were young And free and had to choose I'd take love You would? Certainly Any red-blooded man would How about one in whom The white corpusils dominate That kind too Oh I'm glad to hear you say that Mr. Willoughby I guess you and I think the same way That's about the nastiest crack I've ever heard of Answer that And then get back to work Yes sir Willoughby's store Oh hello Mr. Anderson Yeah, pick me up on my lunch hour And we'll go over and see that critic I've had to choose between Love and a career and I've chosen love I've made my bed Mr. Anderson Now I only hope I can Lie my way out of it Don't be nervous Dennis There's nothing to worry about Just remember You're a big Hollywood star Okay I'm ready Good Ah Mr. Helcott The eminent critic I presume My name is Coleman Coleman? What you don't mean Yes old boy, Ronnie Natch Why this is an honor Mr. Coleman I'd never have recognized you With that muffler over your face Well Mr. Coleman's got a bad head cold Yes old boy Can hardly get my nose open To talk through it Oh I see well This certainly is a thrill For a modest unassuming And extremely talented critic Like myself I've always been a great admirer Of yours Mr. Coleman Splendid You have frightfully good taste old man Yes And I just love the late George Apley Oh we all did old boy All Hollywood turned out for the funeral You see he's referring to your last picture Ronald The late George Apley That was the title Oh of course to be sure So many things on my mind you know Yes I guess you Hollywood people Have a lot to think about Oh quite I'd certainly like to visit that town Someday I've heard so much about everything in it Gromans Chinese Oh yes splendid little chaps all of them But isn't Gromans Chinese a theatre Well Mr. Coleman doesn't get around much You see he's more of a family man Oh yes family problems all the time You know I was saying to my wife Just before I left Hortense I said Hortense Yes my wife Grand girl We're married But isn't your wife's name Benita Oh to be sure Always getting a confuse with a maid Anyway I said to her Benita darling We'll just have to do something about Junior Junior Yes my son wouldn't you say I don't think so You don't have a son Ronald remember Oh well I said to Benita I said darling We'll just have to do something about Junior Referring I hope to my daughter But you don't have a daughter either I drove you're quite right And it's no wonder No wonder what No wonder we never did anything about Junior Ronald I feel that the interview is getting out of hand Oh really Yes I think we'd better get to the business That brought us here Oh quite yes Well you see Mr. Helcott We've been reading your reviews In the local paper for some time No Really Mr. Coleman Yes Yes and we feel that you belong Either in Hollywood or New York I belong in Hollywood or New York Whichever is father I beg your pardon Well what Mr. Coleman means is Wouldn't you like to go Oh of course Goodbye old man and Godspeed But I don't understand We have a job for you in Hollywood A job You'll be a critical boy The same as here Oh for a moment I thought you wanted me to work Oh nothing like that Now run along home and pack We'll take over your duties here Yes we'll put a fine young chap Named Dennis Day right to work on your column Quite oh is there anything special This Dave person should know about your work Oh no it's very simple I just review movies and plays Like the one opening tonight And oh yes Does this Mr. Day Have a five or six year old nephew A five or six year old nephew For writing reviews of radio programs you know Oh I see that explains a lot Yes Well thank you for this wonderful offer Goodbye gentlemen I'll see you in Hollywood I just can't wait to get to the bowl For Harry's piano recital Dennis we did it Yeah can you imagine And just wait till my review of Macbeth appears There'll never be another performance by that company Your arrival is as good as out of town right now We'll Uh oh Do you suppose that fellow changed his mind about going I don't know Come in Mr. Helcott I brought your tickets for tonight I heard about Anderson and then Dennis Where's Mr. Helcott Well I'm the critic here now Mr. Willoughby I did like you told me I chose love What are you talking about Mr. Helcott has left town Homer Dennis is taking his place Dennis is to Why that means he'll review my play My boy No use Mr. Willoughby It's no use Yours was not the love I chose My Dennis what do you mean You know how a good play can get four bells Yeah Yours won't even get a door buzzer You mean you're going to pan my play You can't When the play is over tonight Just don't bother sweeping out the place for tomorrow That's all Oh so that's your attitude is it Well I'll fix you You'll never get into that theater tonight I'll have guards posted at every door Just to watch for you But you can't do that I can huh I can and I will Good boy Gee What are we going to do now Mr. Anderson Do Why sit right down at that desk And start reviewing the play But I haven't seen the play I can't write up something I don't know anything about Can I My boy you keep forgetting you're a critic Now Go to work on your criticism And don't be subtle Well alright Let's see now Last night at the Weaverville Summit theater An audience of first nighters was practically nauseated By the most horrible production Ever to smell up a playhouse Too subtle No I think they'll know what you mean Good Now let's see if I can think up something nasty Hi Mildred My don't you look pretty this morning Why Dennis Aren't you mad at me anymore You mean over that silly Mr. Steward What for I took care of him See the morning paper I know Well I got myself appointed dramatic critic on it yesterday And after what I said about that play He'll never show his face around here again Smart huh Dennis you You mean you panned the play You bet and every actor and actress in it Ooh what I said Lady Macbeth too Oh her I gave the full treatment Oh Dennis Huh My mother played Lady Macbeth Mildred incredible as it may seem I think I've made a blunder Boy will I hear from your mother when she reads that review Dennis Day I've heard from her You worm Did you write this review in the paper Yes ma'am How dare you print a thing like this The play was sick to start with But it never recovered Once Lady Macbeth made an entrance on her too On her too big left feet Just a simple mistake in counting Mrs. Anderson And what about your next line That when I got on the stage Something unfortunate happened to the lights They stayed on Sure he didn't mean that the way it sounds Stop making excuses for him This time he's gone too far This time I'm going to Dennis Mr. Willoughby I want to see you You better hurry Mrs. Anderson and I are having a little discussion From which I may never recover Mr. Willoughby do you realize what this boy has done Well certainly I do He's made our play What Ten minutes after that paper hit the street The box office was swamped with calls The play's a sell out Dennis you're a doll I lead the most uncertain life But I don't understand after that frightful review That's what did it All we needed was a good panning They panned A.B.S. Irish Rose didn't they And Tobacco Road Ha ha We may run ten years Oh Dennis I'm so proud of you Yeah me too Gee can you imagine Being pan by a critic turns out to be even better Than being banned in Boston Dennis Day will be back in just a moment with a song But first here's a fact worth knowing Colgate dental cream cleans your breath While it cleans your teeth And that's important As our Colgate players are going to demonstrate Seen a beach Where a smooth looking bathing beauty Is having a pretty grim time Listen Oh look at those men All they can see is that girl in the red bathing suit Well they can't see you If you hide way down at this end of the beach Claire They can't see me no matter where I am And that's the truth Claire Breath trouble cramps any girl's style So how about seeing your dentist honey And here's what Claire found out Scientific tests prove that in seven out of ten cases Colgate dental cream Instantly stops unpleasing breath That originates in the mouth And Colgate's safe polishing agent Brings out the natural sparkle of your teeth Cleans them thoroughly and safely Yes Colgate dental cream cleans your breath While it cleans your teeth And Colgate dental cream is famous For it's wonderful wake up flavor too Nationwide tests of leading toothpaste Prove that Colgate's is preferred For flavor over other brands tested So to clean your teeth thoroughly and safely For a wake up flavor everyone enjoys Use Colgate dental cream Remember Colgate dental cream cleans your breath While it cleans your teeth With Charles Dand in the orchestra Here's Dennis to sing Peg of my heart Earth and the rose Remember doctors Prove the palm olive plan Brings two out of three women Lovelier complexions in 14 days And this beauty plan with palm olive soap Was tested on women with all types of skin Dry, oily, even skin that was not clear Yes 36 doctors prove the 14 day palm olive plan Improves all types of skin Brings fresher, brighter, younger looking complexions So get palm olive soap And start your 14 day palm olive plan now This is Vern Smith reminding you That Judy Canova's vacation is over And she'll be back on the air This Saturday night So if it's laughter you're after Be sure to tune in the Judy Canova show This Saturday night Over most of these same stations Tonight stay tuned for the Summerfield Bandstand Which follows immediately This is NBC, the national broadcasting company