 All right, so welcome to another edition of the vlog. Me plus you is us. My name is Kwame. I'm Elaine. And we're happy to be back on your screens. Today, as you can see from the caption, we're talking about how it took a village to help us make our stay in the Netherlands better. Yes. And if you hear some baby sounds, there's a small baby. Yeah. He's always around. Make an armor eye. Yeah. Our boss is always around. And yeah, it takes a village or how the Netherlands has treated us in our stay here. And that's what we want to just recap. I think it's more like a gratitude vlog or. Yeah, and I also think it really takes a village as kind of a plea to ask for help whenever you need it. Kwame's made quite a few videos with a set to not on mental health. And we think even as a new parent, it's OK to ask for help. And it really takes a village. So that's why we thought this would be a great way to share what has been happening with us. Here from the beginning, we're taking from scratch. Even before we traveled in arranging a lot of things, we had a lot of help. Yeah, so you want to. Yeah, so I think the first thing we did was asking ourselves where we would want to be when we're in Netherlands. If we're going to be in Ghana or Netherlands. And for me, it was more an emotional decision to be in the Netherlands, be close to my family, my sisters, my brother, and my friends here as well. And then, of course, you need to get to the practical side of things. And we got a lot of help there. I've asked many friends if they knew somebody was going on holiday for a long time or if people would be maybe out of their house and they would want to rent it to us. Anywhere close to my hometown would have been great. And we just started with texting and calling. And in the end, my parents really came true because of their network, we found not one but two places to stay, or actually three. Because in the beginning, we stayed with them for 10 days. It was a good way to land from the craziness of moving houses in Ghana. Yeah, just literally 10 days before traveling back here or traveling here. So it was a good way to just land and be at home while the other places which had been arranged with their help were getting ready. Sorry, for us to move there. So it was good. Yeah, and in the end, we ended up for five weeks in one house of a friend of my parents who went to Australia, which was a really nice house. And it was close to a small lake. I think you've seen that in the video on the New Year's Dive, yes. So it was fun and it was in my own old hometown but it was still in another neighborhood. So it was close to home but not too familiar. And then in the end, we ended up in another house of people who also had a daughter abroad and they went to visit her and the old neighbor of my parents who has moved to this village asked in the WhatsApp group of the village if anybody was going away for a long time. And then if they had a space here. Yeah, and these people normally didn't want to rent out their house but because it went through somebody they know they were willing to meet us and then we took it from there. And it was a great stay so far. We still have a small week to go, but... Yeah, and this is where we are at the moment. So yeah, so even from scratch, yeah, people have been on board with helping us because if we would have done it the other way by ourselves, if I should put it that way, then we would have been paying extremely huge amounts for rent and it probably wouldn't even be close enough to where we wanted to be especially considering the fact that coming here was to be close to Elaine's family for ease of access to them as well as ease of access to the health care system where she wanted to or we wanted to have the baby. Yeah, and even outside of more, this was more like a place to stay, so it was quite a logistical puzzle, but even with a lot of the things we needed, like it's now winter in Netherlands, so it's quite cold. But of course in Ghana we won't need the winter clothes for the baby. So what I did of all the things we needed for the baby, I made a list of the things we already have and the things we were still pending. And then I first asked my other mama friends, he's doing a number two on the vlog. I don't know if people can hear it. So I asked my other mama friends, like, OK, I'm still looking for this and this and this. Could you do you still have those? Or, yeah, maybe you can advise on where to get them and bless you. And they really came through. I hope Korma has some b-roll to show on all the clothes that we got. But it was it was really nice. We had a whole wardrobe for him, winter clothes and everything. And we got so many, like, burp cloths, bat capes. Just the basics. And even his his bed downstairs, which is actually made in Ghana. We got it from Toborra from friends who first lived in Ghana and brought their their baskets here. I mean, it's really nice to have him laying something from Ghana while we are here in the Netherlands. Yeah, so that was really nice as well. We even got a stroller, which is a huge thing for me. It's a huge thing for me. And I also got a pumping machine, and which has been very essential in kind of the feeding journey. So, yeah, our friends or our mom friends really came through. And it was also nice because then you could have a conversation about what do you really need and what do you don't you need? Because the whole baby business also is a lot of marketing and like has a commercial purpose. So it's good to also discuss like, OK, this I really didn't need, but this might be nice to get. So it was outside of the stuff we could borrow and get. And it was also a lot of advice. And yeah, just sharing experiences. So that was really good. Yeah. So that was for the pre prepping before the baby came. And after the baby came or before the baby came or during the labor time as well, we also had a lot of help, especially when Elaine's sister flew in. And during the time when the labor was happening, she was with us the whole time because the labor took longer than we had expected. Yeah. And we were not at any moment feeling like, yeah, we're alone in this or we're doing it alone. Yeah. And I think also logistical wise, one, my parents borrowed their car to us. Yeah, they have two cars and then they let us have one for the entire time would be here, that we didn't have to even think about transportation or lack a way of moving around if we had to. Yeah. And then especially we're doing groceries now. It's just nice that you don't have to worry about how to get there and not buy too many things. You can just, you know, get everything you need and put it in the car and drive back. And the location we are now is also a bit more remote in Dutch terms. It's not a little more remote. Dutch friends have visited and even them think that, oh, wow, OK. Yeah. So I think she's being modest is remote. Yeah. So you need a car to move around. Otherwise, it's going to be very difficult. So that one was also very essential. It's almost impossible. And then for us in the first week, I was still very much recovering and we were already dealing with a lack of sleep from the labor because it took longer than we expected. And of course, there was a little one we had to take care of who also didn't sleep a lot. Three hours max in one go. So we had lots of help. My siblings came through. They made sure groceries were actually delivered, which was such a good moment because we just moved to the second house and we didn't really have a lot of prep time because the labor was going on. Yeah. So I was really worried about what we're going to eat this week because there's nothing in the house. But then they made sure that we had groceries, which was really great. And they also made sure that they came to cook. My mom also came to take care of us and the baby. Bringing food over, apart from cooking, they also bring food over sometimes, which is you have enough to eat in the night and maybe early in the morning, so you don't have to do anything. Yeah, and also just people checking on us, like, how are you doing? Are you okay? Do you need anything? Can we do anything? Which was really nice. And in the Netherlands, that's quite a unique system. So when you get home from the hospital or you just got your baby at home because a lot of babies are born at home in the Netherlands, which is quite unique. When you have like a nurse at home, we go at Kamsorg and they stay with you for a week when... Well, they don't stay in. They don't stay in your house. No, no, but they come to your house every day to help you with the newborn, help you with your household. They learn, they teach you, sorry, they teach you everything. You need to know about your newborn, how to bathe them, how to take care of them, how to do the diaper, how to recognize which cry is what. Yeah. And yeah, all these things. It's really... We had a really very, very knowledgeable lady and she was very caring as well for the baby and also for us because at some point we were really sleep deprived. So then she was like, you guys really need... We still haven't recovered though, but now it's better. You guys really need to sleep because otherwise you're not gonna manage. So it was like little reminders of things on how to take care of yourself in such a dynamic time. I think that was really great. And when she left, we were both a bit like, hmm, that's sad. Yeah. But it's a great system that actually exists in the Netherlands. And yeah, I think, what else? Yeah, that's about it. And even now that things are getting better in terms of how we're managing or handling our boss, still every now and then people pass by, people, no, Elaine's siblings mostly, would pass by, would cook for us and then spend an evening with us. And besides that, I mean, the general culture of having a baby and having a village or a group of, or a network of friends around you is that people would like to visit and share gifts as well. So which is something that has been happening. That's true. In between the visits that, no, it's not visits, in between the family time being here, them cooking for us, them taking care of us every now and then in the beginning it was more, but now it gets like less and less, but every now and then they just offer to come and cook. Yeah. But even the amount of cards we got, it's really crazy. And at some point we, every morning we had packages waiting for us, like cards with some small gift or some... So many books. Yes, books, but... And the toys. Yeah, and like a relaxing package for us. And it was like, people were really showing up and it also makes you feel like, okay, we're not like, we're still juggling things, but people are thinking of us. So it also makes you feel like more, like cared for and supported. Yeah. It was really nice. Yeah. So for us, the import of making this video is more to also compare culturally. I think it's a cultural difference. But in Ghana, when we say it takes a village, it's a different kind of way of doing things in Ghana with your family and everything sometimes or not sometimes. Most of the time, if you're a first-time mother, your mother would probably live with you for a while and teach you and like take care of the baby as well. And your friends would come over every now and then to help out. But it's mostly your mother and your closest family who take up a lot of the things. But we have experienced it in a different way where in Netherlands, a lot of the things that we needed to arrange that we couldn't be physically available had been done. And people were just pulling strings from their networks and just getting things done for us. And when the baby came, they also came here to just be with us, help us. And yeah, it's been an incredible three months from the last stages of the pregnancy to having the baby till now. So that's basically what we wanted to share. And if any of them are watching this video right now, I just want to say that we're really, really grateful. Yeah, really thank you for making. It's also more memorable when you do it together. I mean, we could have arranged stuff on our own, but in the end, like it's nice to do it together. Like it come way, way, way further together. And yeah, it's also nice. I find it also a nice feeling that the baby comes into like a community of people. And because we are also just parents, like we're just trying, but it's good that the baby has other people to learn things from as well. And that people are there for him. Yeah, so we're very grateful for the community and the village so far. And we hope to tighten the village even more. More everywhere we go, we hope to just have a closer next to people that are in our corner. Yes, so thanks for everybody. Who was in our corner doing this crazy roller coaster? Thank you to everybody. Yes, we're really, really grateful. And if you want to catch up on other videos, especially with our culture shock and other cultural conversations, you can check them up on the screen at the moment. We'll catch you in the next one. My name is Kwame and... I mean, I'm Elaine. And this is me plus you is us. Get you next time. Bye.