 Flux presents Hollywood. The Lux Radio Theatre brings you Carrie Grant and Lorraine Day in Mr. Lucky. Ladies and gentlemen, your producer, Mr. Cecil B. DeMille. Greetings from Hollywood, ladies and gentlemen. The zest and enthusiasm that Carrie Grant puts into every performance must convince the most hardened cynic that Carrie loves his work. He loved it enough to run away from school at the age of 13 to join a troupe of acrobats. He loved it at 15 when he was a knock-about comedian in Vauderville, then as a singing juvenile in musical comedy. And knowing Carrie, I think he loved it too in one fantastic interlude when he trapped the boardwalk at Coney Island on stilts, advertising a roller coaster. My guess is that he tried to give just as good a performance then as in these latter days when everybody looks forward to a new Carrie Grant picture as an occasion for celebration. The latest case in point is the RKO hit Mr. Lucky. And starring with Carrie in Mr. Lucky tonight is Lorraine Day, one of the screen's really brilliant young actresses. In fact, after seeing her work in Mr. Lucky, I picked her for the leading feminine role in the story of Dr. Wassell with Gary Cooper. Tonight's play has many surprise twists. It's not all adventure and are all comedy and are all romance, but a magic combination of all three. On the screen, Mr. Lucky made a killing, as he himself would put it. Or in plainer English, the picture hit the jackpot, cleaned up, drew the moolah at the box office. And that's never a matter of just being lucky. The producer of a play, a picture, or a radio drama like these that Lux Flakes brings you on Monday evenings can't trust the luck. He's got to rely on hard work and careful planning and casting. I'm sure the housewife is very sympathetic with that point of view these days too. Shortage of manpower has caused the shortage of many other things, as she knows better than most of us. And so in most homes, things must be made to last longer than ever now. The housewife who's had the wisdom to use Lux Flakes is certainly Mrs. Lucky. And now the curtain for Mr. Lucky and the first act, starring Carrie Grant as Joe and Lorraine Day as Dorothy, with Arthur Hull as Swede. The night fog hangs low over the New York's waterfront. At the end of a long pier, a girl paces slowly back and forth, stopping at intervals to gaze out toward the sea. From the shadows of a dark building, a watchman peers at her suspiciously. Then with a sudden movement, he begins to walk quickly toward the girl. Hey, you there! Take it easy, brother. I wouldn't bother her if I were you. Oh, wouldn't you? Well, thanks for the advice. But how do I know she ain't going to jump? She's all right. She's not going to do anything. She's just going to stand there and look out to sea. She ain't got no right out there without a pass? Brother, she could get a pass to the White House if she wanted it. She's a somebody. Speaking of passes, where's yours? Oh, you're new here, aren't you? Take a look. Oh, ship's master, huh? You see? I told you she was all right. She's just standing there. What's she going to do now? She's watching for a ship to come in. Only it's sitting at the bottom of the Atlantic. What ship is that? Used to be called the Fortuna. Oh, yeah, that gambling ship. He used to be sitting right here at this dock once. That's right. She was owned by a boss gambler called Joe the Greek. Ever hear of him? Oh, sure I did. Everybody who read the newspapers did. Did you know him? Yeah, I was master of the Fortuna. They tell me, was he really a Greek? Nobody ever knew what he was except tough and too smart for his own good. Oh, crossed you up, huh? No, he crossed himself up. Oh. That girl there, right here on this pier was the last time she ever saw him. When was that? Back of ways when we had the Fortuna tied up here. We weren't operating then. We were broke and full of trouble. One day, that was in October 1941. You see, we've been driven off the west coast by the law and put in here to raise a bank roll so we could operate in Havana. Joe was kind of up against it. A little Greek sailor we had aboard, a guy named Bascopoulos, was pretty sick. Joe came waltzing up the gang plank with his face full of fine and dandy and his heart full of ice water. Hi, sweet husband Bascopoulos. Looks like he's going to join Bonham and Bailey, Joe. Yeah, what'd the doc say? Well, according to the doc, he's already gone. Said he wouldn't last over an hour, two hours ago. All gone inside. Say, how'd it go uptown today? Well, thanks, sweetie. I got the plaster taken off the boat. We can sail any time. Good. You know those marks of yours are getting kind of restless. Yeah? Well, let me know when Bascopoulos goes. I'll be in the gambling room. Right. Hey, fellas, it's Joe. Hi, Joe. Come on, boys. Well, anything happen today, Joe? Plenty, boys. I got it. Yeah, you mean the boat's released? It cost me 10 grand, but it was worth it. Look at that. Signed by his honor, the superior court judge. He took seven lawyers to write it up legal and Joe to do the fixing. Here's Zef. Put it in the safe. Boys, we're sending for Havana as soon as Bascopoulos kicks off. Forget it, Joe. This ship ain't going nowhere. Who says so? Your uncle Sam. What is it, Zef? A rib? Yeah. Take a gander at these little postcards. They arrived this morning. Hmm, Bascopoulos. G-Zep. Joe Adams. Hey, that's me. What is this thing? It's from your draft board, Joe. You've been classified. I have, huh? One A. They can't do this to me. I'm a civilian. It's what you think. Take a look at mine. I got the same thing. They don't even give you time to cut off a leg. Oh, listen. This isn't my war. I have my war crawling out of the gut of the hard way. I won that one. I don't recognize any other war. That's okay, Joe. Don't worry. I got it all fixed. Yeah, well, go on, Crunk. Well, we can hop a plane out of here for Mexico City in two hours. What? Yeah. From there, we can catch a plane for real. You can wake South America till this soldier business blows over. Oh, sure. Take it easy, Crunk. Look, you think I'm going to give up the boat on account of this card? None of you other guys got one, huh? Just you and me and Bascopoulos. Well, where's Bascopoulos' card? What did he get? Hmm, 4F. What's that? It means they don't want him. He's physically unfit. A lucky stiff. Yeah, he's physically unfit, all right. He's just about dead. Or is he? Oh, you mean the... Oh, yeah, I get it. All right, boys, get lost. Join me when it's off. He ain't Bascopoulos. 4F, huh? One of us is out of the army, Joe. Yeah, who declared you in? Well, we're partners, ain't we? That's a 50-50 proposition in my book. What do you want? Half the card? I'll trade you. My half the boat for the card, Joe. How good would the boat do me in the army? The one that gets the card gets the boat along with it. Who gets it, Joe? You want a cut for it? No. Poker dice. All right, you got a deal. I'll get the dice. Oh, wait a minute. Can't you wait and make the thing legal? What's wrong with poker dice? Not a thing, only the guy ain't dead yet. I never took anything off a pal in my life. And if he joins the circus, well, that's different. Come on in, Crunk. Is the dock still here? Yep. It's all over, Joe. Bascopoulos just kicked off. Okay. Here's the dice. Take your best shot, Zep. Right. The winner gets the draft card. And the boat. I'll shoot him. Hey, hey, keep your hands above the table, Zep, huh? What do you mean, Joe? Just roll him. Oh, sure, Joe. Three kings. Three kings. It's up to you, Joe. Yeah. Nice rolling, Zep. But this ain't amateur night. I don't get you. You know, now, didn't you see an elephant walk across the table with muddy feet? I didn't play the switch on you, Joe. Didn't you? Then blow on them for luck. Go on blow. Okay. Sure. I wouldn't shove around my own partner. Sure you wouldn't. Three kings to beat, huh? Yeah. That's it. Okay. Holy smoke! Uh, read them, Zep. What do you say? Three aces. Yeah. Well, Zep, take good care of yourself. I'll have a nice big service flag hung up with a single star on it just for you. Well, that's the way Joe Adams got to beat Joe Bascopoulos. Then, afternoon, he went uptown again with Crunk to raise $50,000. We needed that much do-soku he could sail. Well, how about it, Joe? Did you raise the wind? Raise the wind. I couldn't even raise a good cough. I don't know what happened to this town. Well, what about all those soft touches, you know? Ah, the heat's on. They either got caught in the draft or went square and paid their income taxes. Income taxes. It looks like our luck is out. Hey, boss, look. Look at what? That car parked there. What about it? Look at the license. 7L7777. Five sevens. Five naturals. Oh, this is going to change your luck, boss. Come on, come on. Get in. Oh, you get in. I'll wait here. What? Well, boss, you know it's no good if we both don't get in together. What's the money? You're trying to jinx it or something? Come on. Oh, okay. I beg your pardon, sir. It's okay, bud. We just want to sit in the back for a second. But the lady I drive for... They won't hurt anything. Now, sit down, Crunk. Oh, boy. Five naturals. Please, sir, the lady I drive for... Take it easy. Is that long enough, Crunk? Yeah, I guess so. Well, get out. This guy's getting nervous. Howard, we'll go right back to... Oh. Oh. Sorry. Miss Bryant, these gentlemen just opened the door and sat down. I don't know what... Oh, Howard. How do you do? How do you do? Can I sell you a ticket to our charity ball? Oh, sure. One or two? Two. Here you are. They're $50 a piece. Oh, $50? A cheap affair, isn't it? Not exactly. But we're trying to raise $100,000. Oh, you know. Well, that's a coincidence. What's it for, sister? War Relief Incorporated. Well, I'm interested in relief. Where are your headquarters? The address is on the ticket. Let's see. Well, thanks. Here, you keep the tickets. I'll look you up. As a matter of fact, I may throw something your way. Thank you. I beg your pardon, but did you say you wanted to contribute $70 to our war relief? Or was it $700? Neither. I said $70,000. Oh, yes, I thought... Well, do sit down. Do, Mr... I don't believe I got your name. Joe. How are you? Joe? Oh, Joseph. Mr. Joseph. Well, you couldn't have come at a more timely moment. You know, we have to send a whole shipload of medical supplies to Europe. I do hope you want to make your donation in cash. I always do business in cash. Oh, that's splendid. You'll have to help me, though. Of course. Well, you see, I'm a boss gambler. That's my business. Oh, we never inquire into one's association. Yeah, now this charity affair of yours, that's made to order. All you have to do is give me the gambling concession. Gambling? Sure. Blackjack, chocolate, roulette. I'll raise the dough for you in one evening. I don't understand. Well, it's simple. You're given a bore. We take rooms next to it. You steer the customers in. That's all. I sit by the dealers, the tables, the layouts. All you have to do is sit back and rake in the winnings. But are there always winning? Suppose you lose. Oh, we can't. Now, look. I'll show you what I mean. Here's the dice. You roll them. You're the customer. Shall I? Sure, go on. Roll them. There you see. Snake eyes. You lose. Now, watch the difference. Seven. I win. See? I'm lucky. I can't lose. Where? I'll do it again. This time I'll make a dump shot. A what? A dump shot. Hand me the glass. Now, watch. Seven. How do you do it? Influence. Now, you bring me the right people. I'll get you that hundred thousand. But it's gambling. Not the way I do it. It so happens that gambling is against the law in this country. Oh, hello, you. Oh, Adorothy. This is Mr. Joseph, my lieutenant, Miss Biles. I've already had the pleasure. It so happens, Mr. Joseph, that we have a committee of financial advisors. Strange. They've never hit upon your plan if it's so sound. Well, not everyone can do it, Lieutenant. It's kind of... Dangerous? Well, uh... That's what I mean. Oh, well, I'm afraid Miss Bryant's right. Perhaps if you send us a letter explaining your plan in detail... Yes, and we'll take it up at our next meeting. But you're in a hurry for this, Joe. You can't afford a way for meetings. Well, we can't afford to sponsor something we might later regret. Oh, now wait. Adorothy, don't forget your appointment at the bank. Oh, all right. Thanks. Goodbye, Mr. Joseph. I'm sorry, Mr. Joseph. Hey, look. What bank is that? Why is it thirty-one? It's thirty-one. It's thirty-nine. Well, thanks, Tut. Listen, boys. This ain't no bank. This is your blood bank. Well, what's the difference? Where's the girl? What they take away your blood here? You want to lose your blood? Quiet. Next, please. Good afternoon. Hello, Miss Bryant. This is your third visit, isn't it? Yes. We'll have your silver button waiting for you as soon as you're through. Thank you. Sit right over there, please. Well... Hello, Miss Bryant. This is your third visit, isn't it? Yes. We'll have your silver button waiting for you as soon as you're through. Thank you. Sit right over there, please. Well, hello. Hello. Well, well, this is quite a surprise. Not particularly. It so happens I rather expected it. And if you think your persistence is going to have any effect on me, you're mistaken. Well, I can't see how you people can pass up a hundred thousand dollars for the cause. For whose cause? If you're so interested in serving the cause, why don't you join the army? For me? Oh, well, I'm 4F. You look 1A to me. Well, you don't look so bad yourself. I mean... Well, this is my arteries. Well, should you be giving blood? Oh, well, my blood's 1A. It's just my arteries are 4F. See, look. Look, say so. They're on my cards, eh? Jay Beth. Biscopolis. I thought you said your name was Joseph. Well, if a fellow went around calling himself Biscopolis, think what other people would call him. Next. Look, uh... Look, miss, why didn't you let me finish when I was trying to tell that lady the war charities? If so happens, I don't trust your motives. Oh, fine. Here I am giving my life's blood and she don't trust my motives. The person who gets your life's blood will probably develop a sudden passion for the dump shot. Yeah? And a poor soldier who gets your blood, they can use him for an ice cube. Next, Miss Bryant. Ready? Goodbye, Mr. Biscopolis. And the answer is still no. Hey, boss. 1A is back. Huh? Zepp. He ain't in the army yet. Hiya, Joe. What's doing? Hello. How come you're not in uniform, Zepp? Well, I got a couple weeks before I go to camp. I ain't got any place to flop. Okay, if I stay here on the boat. Sure, why not? Thanks. How you coming with the bankroll? I got a crack at the biggest bankroll in New York if it works. What's holding it up? Hmm. An iceberg. But I'll melt it down. Yeah. Okay, if I get something to eat. Sure. Go down to the galley. See what they got. Thanks, Joe. Thanks a lot. Boss, when you clean out a guy like Zepp, you hadn't ought to keep him around. Oh, now, Cronk, is that any way to treat a soldier? Yeah, but I'm telling you, Chief, a guy like that, you know. Never give a sucker an even break. And always keep an eye on the pal. Remember that. Mm-hmm. Hey, where can I get a car? I gotta put on a dog for a few days. Well, I know a fellow in town's got a sedan. Yeah, well, get it. Meet me on the dog in a half hour. Okay. Yes? Oh, Miss Bryant, there's a recruit out here in the audience. But Miss Bryant, it's rather a special case. Well, send her in before she changes her mind. Hello. Oh, what do you want here? I'm her. Oh, I see. Look, I've been thinking about what you said yesterday. And I was, uh, well, I was wondering why you couldn't use me in this setup. You mean you want to enlist in this organization? Yeah, it's time for every man to do his bit. If it wasn't for this week hard, believe me, I... Harderase. Well, Harderase, Harderase, same thing. How about it? What about this gambling at the ball business? Oh, that. Oh, I forgot it. Too bad. It was a good idea. Yeah, good for the cause. Well, never mind. Let it go. Well, as personnel officer, I have no right to refuse any enlistment. However, I think I should warn you. We've had a few men before, but they all ask to be transferred to more active branches. So many women around got on their nerves. Oh, that won't bother me. I might have known. But perhaps you'd better read this first. We expect a lot of our workers. Oh, well, thank you. Do you mind if I sit down, please, ma'am? Oh, no, of course not. Uh, Dorothy, I just said... Oh. Hiya, toots. Hiya. He's going to enlist, Veronica. Isn't this really? Yes, ma'am. You sure you know what you're doing? I do anything to help the cause anything. Oh, I think that's wonderful. You're sure you know what you're doing? Definitely. Well, now you fill the application, and I'll get you a button. Thank you. Sign on the bottom line, Mr. Basterpolis. No, no. No, no. Biscopolis. I didn't think you'd forget me. I don't intend to. You mean sign here? That's right. Okay. Here's your button. Now you're one of us, Mr... Biscopolis. Oh. We? America. Naturalized. Oh, yes. Well. Well, Dorothy, we'll take care of you, and come and tell me how you're getting off. Oh, yes. I think this service is wonderful. Ah, well, everything's fixed. I'm in. Stand up. Take your head off my desk. What? Put out that cigarette. Recruits are not allowed to smoke during office hours. And before you leave, put a fresh bottle of water on that cooler, please. Yes, sure, sure. Now, would you like to begin with a propaganda project? Yes, sir, or madam. Now tell me, do you know how to knit? Knit? I ask if you knew how to knit. Knit? In England, men who were incapacitated knit without hesitation. Knit? Why, the best knitter I ever saw was Wing Commander Barnsville. He picked his up while he was in a plastic hat. I don't knit. That's exactly the attitude we're trying to combat. Here, I don't mind. We want a group of obviously masculine men to take up knitting. Do it perfectly casually in public places. Do you think I'm strong enough? I'm quite serious. Half the women who were knitting for us last year are now learning to drive ambulances and run buses. But look, I... You don't seem to have cut the idea of the organization you've just joined, Mr. Viscopolo. We're people who won't be able to get into the actual fighting. We resent that fact. We take our resentment out and doing our best to help when and how we can. Well, no, I'm not backing out. I can't knit because I don't know how. That settles it. Report to Mrs. Van Every. She's our best instructor. Oh, now, wait a minute. Or do I tear up this application? Uh, okay. Okay. I knit. Good. You may report to Mrs. Van Every. Thank you, madam. I knit. Go ahead. Look, just one more thing. Yes? Before I get the trimmer hat. Before Mr. DeMille presents Cary Grant and Lorraine Day in act two of Mr. Lucky, it's time for mail call. Just a quick look at a few of the letters we've received from men in uniform. You see, a lot of boys who've never washed so much as a pair of socks in their lives are learning to cope with the laundry problem and rotting in to tell us how luck's flakes have helped them solve it. One boy writes from Georgia that when he was washing his petite uniform with luck, the fellows couldn't figure out how he got so many suds in the tub. And a sailor, storekeeper second class, to be exact, tells us that other luck's fans are pikers compared with him. He uses luck for his blue uniforms. Says it gives him a fine lather, rinses out easily, and leaves the wool soft. Another navy man, a stevee from one of the construction battalions, passes along a smart idea. He luxes his blue uniforms, too, and uses an old toothbrush and luck suds to get the fight braid cleaned. I guess we could say, Sally, the boys are getting uniformly good results from luck's flakes. That would be putting it mildly. Well, that's the way to put it when you're talking about luck, isn't it? Seriously, though, luck's is mild and gentle. That's why it's such safe care, not only for army and navy uniforms, but for civilian washables, too. Sweaters, dresses, and blouses. It helps washables last longer because it is so very gentle. It's thrifty to use. A little gives you so many rich, long-lasting suds. So don't waste luck. Use all you need to get good suds, but no more than you need. Next time you shop, be sure you get luck's flakes. Now our producer, Mr. DeMille. Act two of Mr. Lucky, starring Kerry Grant as Joe and Lorraine Day as Dorothy. Here, this Joe was a funny guy. There he was, working in that war charity place, trying to get next to some easy dough so we could open the gambling ship. It looked like everything was going his way, too. Only there was a couple of things he didn't know. Number one, that Zep guy was never drafted. When he went for his physical, he got a 4F. Number two, Zep knew something about the rich Joe Piscopoulos. He knew he was a three-time loser who had to report to the parole board every month. But what Joe didn't know wasn't hurting him, not yet, anyway. Well, down at the war charity place one morning, there was a little trouble. The ladies were in some kind of a jam about money. All I know is I want 1,200 bucks. Please don't shout. Oh, excuse me. Excuse me, ladies. Good morning, Mr. Piscopoulos. Well, what seems to be the trouble? Well, she owes me 1,200 bucks. That's a trouble. He's trying to charge us $6 a piece for some second-hand blank. I could have got 10 bucks. Millions of refugees shivering in tents, and this preacher tries to hold us up. You ought to be ashamed of yourself raising your price just because blankets are hard to get. That's the old law of supply and demand, lady, and it ain't been repealed yet. Six bucks a piece. Where's the check? I tell you, we haven't it in our account. All right, all right, then. I'll take back the blanket. Oh, now wait, now wait. Look, you look like a pretty good sport, Mr.... McDougal. McDougal? I'll tell you what I'll do. I'll flip you. I'll give you 2,600. If I lose, I'll pay for it out of my own kick. I wouldn't want to have those shivering refugees on my conscience. Now, what do you say, Mr. McDougal? 2,600? Yeah. You're on. Okay, now, I'll toss the coin and you... Ed! Oh, wait a minute. I... Oh, I am sorry. I couldn't do it with this coin. You see, it's got tails on each side. I got it from a gambler. I wouldn't want a jib. See, you'd have lost. Oh, well, thanks. Now, uh... What do you say we do that old behind-the-back routine, you know? Behind-the-back? Yeah, you guess what hand it's in. Oh, yeah, sure. Go on. Now, are you all ready? I'm ready. All right, which hand? The left. The left. Let's see. No, it isn't in the left. Well, I'm sorry, Mr. McDougal. We get the blankies for 600. Oh, now, wait a minute. Wait a minute. You ought to give me another chance to break even. Double or nothing. No, no, I don't think I could do that, Mr. McDougal. Some of the main guys in here don't like gambling. Double or nothing. Come on. Well... Well, all right. Now, you ready? Yeah, I'm ready. All right, double or nothing. Now, here you are. Right hand or left? The left. Open it up. Here you are. Empty. You know, that's a funny thing. That wouldn't happen again in a thousand times. Yeah, it won't happen again to me. Never mind. You'll sleep well tonight because you did a good deed for a worthy cause. Now, here's a button. Now, you're one of us. I have contributed to war relief incorporated. Yeah. I have been taken by war relief incorporated. Yeah, Joe beat him fair and square. That coin Joe used, though, had a little pin in it. When he put his hands behind him, he stuck it on the back of his coat, so it was never in either hand. Fair and square, according to Joe. Money saved the charity $1,200. And then there was a time he went down to the docks with Miss Bryant. There was more trouble about loading some trucks. I've been trying to think of some way to thank you for getting us the blankets. Well, the percentage was in our favor. The other guy was doing the guessing. You know, ever since you first came in, I've been trying to figure out why. Oh, now, look, what's a guy supposed to do? Put his heart on a plate before you'll trust him? What do you think you'll get out of helping us? I told you, I'm just trying to do him a bit. That doesn't explain anything. Oh, well, I just don't like to talk about it, that's all. But, uh, look, the name of Biscopolis goes back a long time. You mean in Greece? Yeah, over in Greece, where the Nazis are pushing them around. Look, how do I know what happened to my brothers and my kid's sister? The thing I like the idea of those guys walking into my mother's little kitchen? I lie awake at night trying to figure out how to help. They turn me down for military service. So I do the next best thing. I try to raise dough to get supplies for those poor people. So now you know. Oh, I'm terribly sorry. Oh, that's all right. Don't apologize. I'm sorry I had to tell you that's all. Now, what about this guy we have to see? Oh, he won't unload our supplies until he gets a check. The medical supplies, and they're important to save lives. I say, well, I'll talk to him. Joe, what's that in your hand? This? Oh, a roll of dimes. Why do you carry it? Have it. It fits nice in your hand. Joe talked to the guy all right. And when he got done, the guy really listened to reason. Of course, that pack of dimes in Joe's hand helped a little. Oh! In the truck, boy! Joe, your face is cut and on your coat's all ripped. Come on, let's get back to the charity. What happened in there? Oh, you misunderstood that guy. Nice fellow, a family man. What happened to your dime? Oh, I tipped the guy. Did you have to tip him very hard? Want me? Fight? Go on, I'm a peace-loving citizen. Joe, he might have killed you. I'll be silly. Just a scratch. Hey, do you mind if we stop at the tailor so I can get him to sew this fiddle? The what? The fiddle and flute, the suit. Oh, what kind of double-talk is that? It's a language. I picked up in Australia. Like, well, like shoes, ones and twos. Sounds like poetry. Well, that's the idea. Jingles. Like you're a girl, twist and twirl. Well, what are you? Me, I'm a bloke. That's a heap of coke. Well, this twist and twirl is going to take care of the heap of coke's, uh, scratch. Cabbage pack. We'll stop at my house. It's on the way. Uh, oh. Anybody home? No. Oh, fine. Have Mr. Viscopolis coast fixed faster? Uh, yes, Miss Dorothy. Will you take it off, please, sir? Yeah, sure. I'll get some bandages. What were you saying before, Joe? Oh, yeah. So the, uh, so the crunk of me are sitting in this coffee joint when in comes a pot and pan with his cheese and kisses. That's a man. Yeah. Cheese and kisses. That's a message. Sure. Well. Well, the crunk said to me, Piper Heisig, the isopose on that guy's stormy strife in the Tommy Horner. Wait a minute. I'm lost. Piper? Piper Heisig. That's just pipe, you know. Take a look. Yeah. At the isopose. The nose? Uh-huh. On that guy's stormy strife in the Tommy Horner. On his wife? Yeah. In the corner. Right. Well, what happened? The guy come over and punched the crunk right in the snoot. Why? Well, the guy was from Australia. Oh. Your coat, sir? Yeah. Here you are, John. Where can I wash up? To your left, sir. Well, uh, don't go away, Miss Brian. I won't. Miss Dorothy. Yes? Shall I telephone for a bottle and stop her? A what? A copper in the American pedaculate. Why, Foster, don't tell me you've been to Australia? Oh, that's where I met my stormy strife, uh, Mrs. Foster. Oh. Uh, please forgive me, Miss Dorothy, but are you aware of the character of this gentleman? Oh, I think so. Why? Do you know he carries a lady from Bristol? A what? A pistol in American, in the American parlance or rod, if you get what I mean. Oh. Well, don't be alarmed. I think it's part of his character. He carries it for balance. Uh, yes, Miss Dorothy. Take the coat along, Foster, and see if Mrs. Barnes will sew it up. What's that, Foster? A coin, Miss. It fell out of the pocket. Let me see that. A coin with a pin on the back. That's rather an unusual ornament, isn't it, Miss? Oh, it's not an ornament, Foster. It's really very practical. They're coming with a fiddle. Here you are. Thanks. By the way, Foster was quite alarmed. He thought I should send for a bottle and stop her. Yeah. What for? The lady from Bristol. Oh, that. Well, I wouldn't feel dressed without one. Have you ever killed anyone? No, I'm too good a shot. Hey, look, look. Don't get me wrong. I'm a gambler, not a gangster. Tell me some more. Some more what? Some more jingle talk. Oh, there. Oh, OK. Now, look, if we were going together, you'd be my briny Marlin, my darling, see? Then I'd be the guy who'd give you that simple Simon, diamond for your long and linger, finger. The guy who'd give me this simple Simon was my mother. Oh, yeah? More. Well, uh, find it fair as you're here. Dots and dyes, eyes. The eyes, suppose, nose. North and south, mouth. That's where you get the honey and bliss, kiss. Joe, that's enough, Joe. Come on, take off your mask. You're with friends. Don't be silly. Come on, briny Marlin, don't play games. Let me go. I'm not playing games. Well, don't give me those baby blues. You think I brought you here because... because... Well, didn't you? Now, have you changed your mind? All right. Suppose we settle it with that game you played with McDougal. Oh, you mean the coin stuff? Behind the back. OK. Now, here's a coin. Are you ready? Mm-hmm. All right. Which hand is it then? Neither. Oh, come on. Play fair. You got a guess. Neither. Open them both. OK. You see? Oh. It's in the left. Ha-ha-ha. Well, well, how do you know? It looks like you lost. But when you played it with McDougal, you... Yeah, that's right. I pinned it on the back of my coat. But that was different. You never give a sucker an even break. But don't cheat a friend. I believe in that. I live by it. You don't think I play phony with you? Well, uh, you lost. I didn't know the rules of the game. No, you didn't. Well, OK. Where's my tit for tat? Hat. Joe, wait. Well? Joe, will you run the gambling concession at the ball? Oh. Well, well. Are you sure you can trust me? Now I know I can. OK. You've got a deal. Hello, Grandfather. Foster said you wanted to see me. Yes. Sit down, Dorothy. Wait till I part of my I suppose and comb my barn at fair. Where on earth did you pick up such gibberish? From Foster. It's wonderful slang, Grandfather. You should talk to him. I have been talking to Foster. Oh? What do you mean, Doc, by bringing a gangster into this house? Now don't tell me you're worrying about me, Grandfather. I'd give you odds against any eight gangsters in the city, but I don't want them coming to my house. What can you see in a fella like that? Joe is the first man I've ever met I'm afraid of. It's exciting. Joe, see here, Doc, this fella hasn't been making advances to you, has he? Of course. He kissed me. What? Right on the north and south. Oh, I pretended to be angry, but the truth is I like him. Now see here, I will not have this kind of thing. Oh, now, Grandfather, don't worry. I'm quite safe. Get rid of him, child. Get rid of him at once. Well, I suppose I should. Yes, I think he'd be too hard to tame. Good night, Grandfather. Uh, Doc, what's his name? The Hippocoke? Oh, you'll never believe me. Joe Viscopolis. Joe what? Viscopolis. Now do you wonder why I call him by his first name? Good night, Bryony Marlin. Viscopolis. Joe Viscopolis. Yes? Miss Bryant, there are three men here to see you. What about? Well, I think they're detectives, Miss Bryant. Oh, well, send them in. Miss Bryant? Come in. We're going to find Joe Viscopolis. He isn't here. Where's his desk? Out there. Thanks. Wait. I'm so glad you came. My grandfather sent for you, didn't he? I always thought there was something wrong with Mr. Viscopolis. We want to have a little talk with him. Anything serious? When a guy's been convicted three times, carry on a gun is plenty serious. Oh. Oh, excuse me. Didn't know anyone was here. It's all right. Who's that? Oh, um, he's the man from the water company. It's about time you showed up, Inspector. Huh? Yeah, why? I've telephoned the water company several times today. Is this your idea of reliability? Three bottles and stoppers arrived this afternoon with no coolers. Oh, three bottles and stoppers? Yes. Is this the best service you can give us? I've just about made up my mind to take our business elsewhere. Well, where, for instance? I think the Plaza Fountain Place will serve our needs in the future. Okay, lady. Go on up to the Plaza Fountain Place. Will you sit down, gentlemen? I'm afraid you'll have to wait. Joe! Hi, uh, clever girl. I figured you meant you'd meet me at the Fountain. Oh, Joe, I was scared. Why should the cops be trying to pick me up? Grandfather, you will carry a lady from Bristol. Oh, they picked me up for packing a ride. I can get sprung in a couple of hours. Come on, my car's over here. Get in. What for? The crunks in my own car waiting around the corner. I've already told him to go home. Now, don't ask questions. Get in. Okay. Hey, we're not only out of town. We're out of the state. Is it all right for me to ask questions now, please, teacher? I have to talk to Grandfather. What? Well, he's back in New York. Oh, I have to talk to him on the phone. We've passed thousands of good phones. No, this call must come from the right locality. Grandfather is no fool. Well, how far is the right locality? Pretty far. Relax, Joe. Hold the match up. I've got a key somewhere. Sure. What is this place? The ancestral home. It's been closed a few months. Where do I turn on the lights? They're not connected. Oh. Is this the old man's place? No, mine. It comes from the other side of the family. The side that was always getting into trouble. That's the kind of trouble I'd like to get into. There are candles over here. Let me your matches, Joe. You'll find some more candles on the table. Oh, yeah? Thank you. What's this over here? Just a little sitting room. Little? It's all right. This is where I used to entertain my bows. Uh-huh. After tea would sit by the fire and hold hands. Will you light the fire, Joe? Oh, sure. Hello, operator. Oh, it's all right. This is Miss Bryant. Oh, I'm fine. Thank you. I want to talk to my grandfather in New York. Yes, that's the number. Will you ring? Thank you. Hey, you know, for a family that was always getting into trouble, they did all right. Well, it was just that they never seemed to behave the way people expected them to. They're the family portraits. Look at them. They're crazy, darling. Maybe it will give you some idea of why I don't make sin. What did that one do? Well, he was a great admirer of the ladies. Uh-huh. He was a hunter and maker of 19th-century love. Where'd he get his dough? From the first one. The next one wrote poetry, privately printed at his own expense. Yeah, where'd he get his dough? From the second one. He wasted his entire life trying to spend the family fortune. He finally killed him. Yeah, but where's the guy that made all the dough in the first place? Over here. My great-great-grandfather. From log cabin to rich. Ah, well, that's the guy. Hello. Oh. Well, will you call me when you get a line through it? It's important. What are you going to use for an argument when you get him? Oh, I'm not going to say much. He's going to do most of the talking. He's going to tell me about your three convictions, and I'm going to tell him I don't care. Huh? What three convictions? Oh, don't pretend, Joe. It's all right. Oh, wait a minute. What are you talking about? I know all about it. The policeman told me today. Go on. I never took a rap in my life. Please, Joe. Be honest. Well, all right. I haven't always been on the level, but this clean as far as John Law was concerned. Hello, Grandfather. Now, don't get excited. I'm in Maryland. Maryland. That's right. Grandfather, you sent those policemen to the office today, didn't you? Yes, I know you did. Well, listen. You know the laws of Maryland, don't you? Well, unless you give me your word of honor, the police will be called off. I'm going to marry him. Marry him. Oh, I can't, can't I? Well, call my bluff. Go ahead. I'll give you 10 seconds to make up your mind. What? Give me your word, then. Thank you, darling. Good night. Well, didn't I tell you to leave it up to me? Yeah. You're great. Well, it worked. Why wouldn't it work? You had a swell club to smack him with me. Joe. You think the worst thing that could happen to you is to marry me? But people like you folks like me are animals. We're so bad. And you're so very good. Now, what do you expect? Credit for it? How could you be anything else but what you had to start out with? You ought to be horse-whipped if you didn't turn out right. What are you so high and mighty about? What did you ever do? Joe. There's a guy, the guy up there. He made all your dough for you, and he was born in a log cabin. You know where I grew up? In a one-room shack with a dirt floor. You talk about this side of your family as far as I know, we only had one side, and it was awful poor. Not to times it wasn't what for to eat. That's why I ran away when I was nine. I got tired of being hungry and seeing my old lady go hungry until she died. Oh, please, Joe. Oh, I'm not complaining. It's okay with me. I just got a load of what it gives with your kind of people. My kind? I just know that your kind can look through me like I was a pane of dirty glass. Oh, Joe, it's not me. It's people like grandfather. I thought you knew how I felt. Sure, I know. Anything for the cause. I'm not kidding myself, sister. I know how I stand with you after you cash in on me. You're wrong, Joe. You're all wrong. All right, come on. We can quarrel all the way back to New York. Wait a second. Did you mean that about me being wrong? I should have slapped your face. Why didn't you? Because you would have slapped mine back. I don't know what to make of a dame like you. Neither do I. Yes, I do, too. I suppose I've known for weeks that I'm in love with you. Hey. Oh, Joe. Joe, look at me. Won't you say something? Don't you like it? Well, I don't know. I don't know whether I like it or not. We pause now for station identification. This is the Columbia Broadcasting System. Forement, Mr. DeMille brings back Carrick Grant and Lorraine Day in Act 3 of Mr. Lucky. But now let's look in at the house around the corner where young Mrs. Adams is washing dishes and laying down the law at the same time. Any day now, do you know what I'm going to do? I'm going to start rationing dishes around this house. You children can have one plate of peace, and if you want any more, you can just wash them yourself. While my hands are in such a state right now, I'm ashamed to look at them. Sounds to me like a case for luck's flake. Say, uh, Mrs. Adams, how would you like your hands to lose that ugly dishpan look and grow soft and smooth again? Why, I'd love it, but who's going to wash the dishes? You are. All you have to do is change from that strong soap you're using to gentle luck's flakes. Well, how do you know just changing to luck's will help my hands? We've proved it by actual tests. Scores of women prove that simply changing from strong soaps to luck's flakes for dishes gets rid of dishpan readiness. That certainly sounds worth trying. And that's not all. Those same gentle luck's flakes that are the kind of hands do more work, too. Luck's does up to twice as many dishes as the same weight of other well-known soaps tested. And before you ask me, yes, we've proved that, too. You mean I can actually do more dishes with the same weight of luck and have my hands look softer and smoother, too? Uh-huh, I do. Well, my goodness, what am I waiting for? I'll run down to the store and get some luck's flakes right this minute. And, uh, Mrs. Adams, if you don't find luck's flakes in stock today, it's worth waiting for. Your dealer will have more soon. Remember, luck's does more dishes and saves your hands. Be sure you get luck's flakes. Now, Mr. DeMille returns to the microphone. There's a secret to tell about one of our stars after the play, but now the curtain rises on the third act of Mr. Lucky, starring Cary Grant and Lorraine Day. If something funny happened to Joe after that, I guess it was falling for that girl the way he did. And then a letter came for Joe Biscarpolis, the real one who died. It was in Greek and Joe took it down to the Greek church and asked the priest to read it to him. You wish to see me, my son? Yes, Father. I got a letter. It's written in Greek and kind of in a hurry, but I'll pay you if you'll read it for me. You can drop your offering in the fur box as you go out. I'm here to help those who need it. The letter's from your mother, huh? Oh. He says, Joseph, my beloved son, God grant this letter reaches you. Always you have broken my heart by the wicked things you have done. Yet surely when you hear of the terrible thing that has happened to those who love you, I believe that God will open your eyes and cleanse your heart. Well, that's not Father's thanks. I just want to know who it was from. Listen, I'd like to tell you of my great pride in my other sons, your brothers. It happened two Sundays ago. We were coming from church. There was a roaring in the sky, and suddenly great parachutes began to drift down toward the meadow below the village. There were only five guns in our village, but there were pitchforks and sights and men of great strength. Your brother, Petros, and your brother, Euladio, led the other men into the meadow. There were patches of white lilies, but before the hour was done, it was as though the field were covered with red lilies. No one of our men lived but a hundred Germans died, and Greek honor lived for an added hour. The processor village, of course. I earned food by making their beds and washing their dishes at the inn. Yet I am sustained by my God and my great pride. Thy mother, Maria. Mother, thanks. Thanks, Father. May God comfort you, my son. It was that same day that we opened the gambling concession at the ball. It was a big night and the door was rolling in. Joe showed up about eleven o'clock. Ah, gee, boss. You sure picked a soft touch. Yeah? I guess we ought to leave some for charity, huh? Maybe a couple of grand. Even so, our grab ought to be over 200,000. Hey, what's the matter, boss? Crunk, did you ever sit on a park bench for two hours and look at yourself? Our grab is nothing. Huh, but I thought you said we was taking a whole take. No, I'm just keeping enough to pay off the boys. The rest goes to war release. Yeah, but Joe... You don't mind if I dub across myself, do you? Yeah, but look, Joe, I... You look. This charity bunch has a boat docking next week. They're loading her up with supplies going over to Greece. They need those things over there, and they're going to get them. Okay, Joe. Where's Joe? I got to see him. Hey, there's Zepp. Well, let him in. Close the door. In here, Zepp. What do you want here, Zepp? Listen, Joe, there were a couple of parole officers down at the boat. What they got on you? Not me. J. Bascopoulos. It turns out he was a three-time loser under the bombs law. Oh, that's it. Three convictions, huh? Yeah, I knew that put you on a spot, so I checked up. I found this letter from the parole board and some old clothes he left behind. One more rub with the law, and Bascopoulos goes up for life. You better beat it, Joe. Tonight. Well, I stalled them up, but suppose they come here. My neck's clean. Take over the cash box, Frank. Okay. I got to see somebody. How's business, Frank? Okay. Gonna clean up, eh? What's the charity's cut? Beat it, Zepp. You ain't got these business in here. Oh, I don't know. Maybe I better stick around. Where have you been, Bryony Marlin? I've been waiting for you all night. What happened to you? Oh, I woke up. Oh, something's happened to me, too. Yeah, what? I was struck by lightning. Hey, nobody's dancing. Does it matter? Come on, dance with me, Joe. Look, you remember this. You were right when I was wrong. For me, you're right, always. You'll get everything you want. You'll get enough to fill two ships, maybe three. There's something else I want. Now, you stay away from guys like me. You'll only get hurt. I'm clearing out tonight. Clearing out? Where, Joe? Well, what's the difference? Joe, take me with you, please. Dorothy, this is Captain Costello of the police department. There's your man, Captain. Grandfather, you broke your word. Nothing of the kind. Captain Costello is here to stop this gambling. Grandfather, you can. Yes, he can. All right, be closed up. I'll tell the boys. But, Joe. Go far enough ahead. Send the committee upstairs. We'll count up. All right, Crunk, we're closing up. Hey, where's the Crunk? Close the door, Joe. Where is he? The boys took him inside. We're handling the money now. Yeah. Wait a minute. What is this? The law's downstairs. We're closing up. Who did you think you were fooling, Joe? We knew that dame had to wring through your nose. I'm declaring myself back in the old partnership. Any arguments? All that parole board needs to know is Biscopolis operated this game and those one-way doors playing shut for good. Oh, and I can prove I'm not Biscopolis. OK, then you're Joe Adams, the draft dodger. That's good for 10 years in Leavenworth. You better be a good boy, Joe. All right, I know when I'm licking. Here comes the dames to check up. Now, let him in. Don't open that door. Now, wait. Sit tight, Joe. I got a rod looking you right in the middle. Take it easy. What about the dough? We're taking it down the back way. Oh, all of it, huh? Every nickel. Here it is, sir. Yes. Put it down, sir. Hands off, Joe. Put it down, sir. Get away, or I'll... Put it down, sir. Wait! You... He went down the fire escape with a dough in his arms and a bullet in his chest. I met him at the boat and took the slug out of him. He was a pretty sick guy. Next morning, he sent me around to the girl's house with a dough wrapped up in some newspaper. Wait a minute. Where is he? Where's who? Where did you get this money? The man I met in the park. He asked me to bring it to you. You're lying to me. Oh, where is he? Where's Joe? Joe, I don't know any Joe. What did he look like? The man who gave you the money. I don't know. I never saw him before in my life. Oh, wait, please. She tried to find him for weeks, but I had the guy hiding out. Meanwhile, everything went haywire on the charity deal. That boat they were supposed to load with supplies for Greece was knocked off by subs before it ever reached New York. We heard about it down on the docks. And then one day at the girl's house, the detective showed up with some news. Well, we saw that case for him. It's brandy's dead. Who's dead? Mescabalus. He was a wrong guy, all right. Look at that record. Three years at San Quentin, two at Leavenworth, five at Singsy. But this picture. Well, what's the matter? This isn't this. That's not Mescabalus? No. Oh, that's him, all right. Me and Sam checked their facts with the coroner's office. We also checked it with the captain of the gambling boat he was on. He was missing. The boat was missing, too. And we finally ran it down. Over at Pier 48, they're loading a ship called a Briney Marlin with medical supplies from your office. The what? What did you say the name of the ship was? The Briney Marlin. At least that's what they call it now. The Briney Marlin. The Briney Marlin. The boat was just pulling out when she got there. She came running down the dock, calling to him. Joe. He was standing at the rail, kind of smiling. Joe. Joe, take me with you. Please, darling. I love you. Please take me with you. You don't belong with a grifter like me. You just got some mud on your dress, that's all. Give it time. Let it dry. It'll brush off. Oh, no, Joe. Joe, I love you. Please take me with you, Joe. Please, Joe. Goodbye, Briney Marlin. That's it. She never saw him again. That's why she's standing down there now at the end of the dock. She comes here every night. Well, what happened to the Greek? We delivered the stuff. Then he joined the merchant marine and coming back, the Briney Marlin drew a dead heat with a German torpedo. Funny, a guy like him winding up that way, huh? You can't kill a fellow like Joe. That's him now. Hey, Joe. Hi, sweet. Where you been? Waiting for you, that's all. Come on, Joe. The dinghy's at the end of the pier. Let's get back to shipping. Change my mind. We're not going back to ship tonight. I'll listen, Joe. Come on. It's our last night of shore. I've got a cab wait outside. We're going uptown. Okay, but you've got to go down and tie up that dinghy anyway. Why should I? Because I'm telling you to. It's an order. Okay. She's turning around. I think she sees him. Yeah. It's okay. That's the real finish. We can go now. We'll be back in a moment for a curtain call. In the meantime, here's a true story about how highly one girl valued her nylon stocking.