~~~ Lyrics: Gosh it disturbs me to see you Garen Hiding alone in the brush Enemies coming to facecheck are doomed 'First Blood' is yours in a rush
There's no champ in LoL half as OP as you You're the reason that Amumu cries You cause all your foes to ragequit and QQ and it's not very hard to see why ...
No one ganks like Garen Newbie spanks like Garen In a big team fight nobody tanks like Garen
For there's no champ in LoL half as manly Perfect! A pure paragon! You can ask AP carries like Annie, and they'll tell you who's team they prefer to be on!
No one yells like Garen Silences spells like Garen Takes ratings right out of ELO hell like Garen
I'm especially good at kill stealing DEMACIA! First Blood for Garen!
Down 9 towers and 3 inhibs, Garen is so fed that you spend your time dead!
No one crits like Garen Takes last hits like Garen All while giving his enemies fits, that Garen!
For there's no DPS quite so brawny As you see I've got HP to spare build him crit, AD he's oh-so-pwny You know he's so OP that it's not even fair!
No one spins like Garen No one grins like Garen 3v3, 5v5 no one wins like Garen
I'm especially good at ROFLstomping DEMACIAA! Pentakill for Garen!
When I was a newb I bought a Doran's Blade at the shop before heading to lane But now that I'm 1337 I buy boots and 3 pots and harass 'til my foes are insane!
No one wards like Garen Wields big swords like Garen In a 1v5 no one's as bored as Garen
I've flat AD in all my ruuuuuuune pages!
My what a guy, Garen
I wish I had the time, software and the video editing skills to put together a montage of in-game footage of Garen pulling off the stunts described, but I sadly don't. If you're inspired to do so, have at it!