 That's quite dramatic. It's time. Time for me to unwrap the first book I'm going to be reading for this book series. So if you don't know, I'll put the announcement video here but every Tuesday in December I'm going to be unwrapping one book from my physical TBR and I'm going to be reading it. The object of this is to finally get around to the books that I never read, which is so many of them. I'm such a Christmas person, I'm so looking forward to Christmas and so I wanted to do a series on my channel that like has that feeling of Christmas like unwrapping books so I'm really excited for this and I hope you are too. So essentially I'm gonna unwrap a book in this and then we're gonna read it and it'll be a reading vlog and there's gonna be one of those a week. I've got to make a decision what to open first. I'm in a bit of like not a reading slump but I'm only just getting back on the horse so I don't think I want anything too big. I think I'm gonna go with this. This is a paperback, it feels like a relatively small paperback. Do I want a paperback though or do I want like a hardback? Or do I want that? I don't even know what it is. It could be something I really want to read but I'm like freaking myself out. Yeah we're gonna go with this one. No we're not. Okay I feel attracted to this one instead. Something about the white paper is obviously what I'm feeling today. I'll try it. Oh! Okay I think I'm gonna go with this one. I just don't feel like, I thought I was thinking of the paperbacks I have that are like this size and I don't know if I want it. Okay this is exciting! What am I gonna read? Okay. Yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah yeah. That's quite dramatic. Okay this is fun. I'm actually in the mood for this. I should have like unwrapped it on the screen so you could see. Should I re-enact it? Please escort this lady over here. Okay so in this vlog I am going to be reading The Midnight Library by Matt Haig. This is what I've been wanting to get to since it came out. Molly reminded Molly very kindly gifted this to me for my booktube birthday back in September for my one year on booktube. Okay I was actually in the mood for some fantasy. Oh between life and death there is a library. Yes Matt Haig. So it says when Nora Seed finds herself in the Midnight Library she has a chance to make things right. Up until now her life has been full of misery and regret. Oh no. She feels she let everyone down including herself. Oh no but things are about to change. The books in the Midnight Library enable Nora to live as if she had done things differently. With the help of an old friend she can now undo every one of her regrets as she tries to work out her perfect life. This is oh I love the hard back. Like this teal color. This is very exciting. I think it's like life fantasy maybe but I'm super excited and it's not it's under 300 pages. Oh my god yes that's what I need right now. I've read one Matt Haig. I've read The Humans. I don't think I really liked it. I read it like six seven years ago. So I'm hoping this will be better. This has been like such a popular book like everyone has been obsessed with it that has been reading it. Okay that was a good first one. Well all my books are good first ones but this was a really good first one. So I am only 17 pages into this like I'm barely into it at all and like I already feel like it could be five stars. You know when you get out of feeling when you start reading a book where you're like yes this is it. It just feels special. I think it's gonna be dealing with well it is already dealing with a lot of heavy topics surrounding mental health which is something I know Matt Haig is very vocal about and open about. The chapters are all starting with nine hours before she decided to die Nora. So we know that she is going to I assume commit suicide and so that's this kind of like heavy thing lingering over everything that we're reading at the start. I'm just really in love with the writing already. I think the writing is beautiful so far so I'm excited to read on more. I haven't had time to read it's not that I haven't wanted to and I'm just really intrigued to see what the Midnight Library is and how that works. I'm really excited to actually get into it. I just wanted to let you know that my initial thoughts were this is gonna be five stars and like I don't want to speak too soon but there's been very few books that I have had that initial feeling and haven't been five stars. There's been a few but it's rare. 90 pages in and as much as I want to come reading is like a third of the way in so I thought I should probably check in with you seeing this is just a one but greeting block. I love it. Like I really love it. I really love it. A classic? Classic? Not debatable not a for debate. I think I mentioned that a protagonist it's counting down to when she decides to die. We know that at the start and that happens but as much as I say trigger warnings for suicide the good thing about it is that it's not on page like explicitly described so I definitely appreciated that aspect of it. I think Matt Haig probably knew that it would be very triggering to some to read that and it's not that you don't need to read it. It's very emotionally impactful without that and she has travelled to this place called the Midnight Library and essentially it is just her getting the chance to go and visit lives where there's a certain regret that she has about her life be it something to do with a relationship something to do with a job a career where in that life she she didn't not do the thing that she regrets not doing if that makes sense or doing the thing that she regrets doing. Um that doesn't make no sense. So in one she's like oh I regret breaking up with the guy I was engaged to so she goes to the life where they were together. If she feels disappointed with that life that she goes to in any way she gets drawn out of it and goes back into the library and I think she can keep doing it. I think until she um she finds a life that she loves and can stay in it I'm not sure if she can go back to the life that she had before because I don't think she's actually dead technically I don't know. It is just so emotionally impactful. I already know I'm gonna cry. I've already cried a little bit but that was something very trivial. It was just about a cat and cats get me. I really love the writing in this it's so beautiful and just the way that it's dealing with mental health. I'm struggling to think of a fiction book that has dealt with mental health in this way that has just had such a perfect look at it and what it how hard it can be living with like poor mental health and I really love our main character and I just love this idea of like glimpses into all these different lives and I just think the pacing is brilliant the way the book is written is brilliant like I just think everything about it currently is brilliant that's all I really can say. I just love the way it's structured of like being back in this library with this librarian questioning about her regrets and then going into this other life and seeing what she achieved that she'd always wanted to achieve but also what the drawbacks of that life are and it's just dope like it's just so cool so I'm really enjoying it I cannot wait to read more okay so I haven't read any more but I just wanted to check in to say that I'm hopefully gonna finish it today I'm just taking the day off of like uni work and stuff I'm gonna go out to the local garden centre for oh my god for a social distance lunch with my grandparents I haven't seen a month that's gonna be really nice and then yeah the rest of the day I'm just going to read this. So I didn't finish it like I wanted to and I am still I'm now on page 182 and I'm still loving it I just haven't been reading as much but hopefully now I'm gonna get back into it sometimes I just go through these stages and it's hard when I'm trying to post a lot and I'm really busy with uni like I've got an essay due on the 17th and I haven't done much reading for it yet and it's currently the 7th so I've got 10 days. Wala what do we have ladies a fucking clown we are a stupid bitch we are a fucking clown I think I can do it because it will only take me like three four days to write I am still loving this I'm gonna finish it tonight and then I'll finalize my thoughts with you in the morning I just really appreciate from this like Matt Hague's like experience with mental health and so the lens that this book is viewed through you know it's trying to teach Nora that her life is worth it's her name Nora have I just completely made that up yeah it's it's trying to teach Nora that her life is worth living you know the way it does that it's like teaching you that as well like there was this bit I really liked about how small we are in the grand scheme of things how small our contribution to the world to the universe is going to be so like our problems are small I think it's it's really good to be reminded like how small and minuscule your problems are and also the fact that Nora is visiting so many possible lives you could have had and there's elements of sadness in each of them shows like it's it there isn't a quote I can read you out it's usually a really insightful like page or half a page rather than like just a line that hits home but talking about like you're gonna have sadness in whatever dream life you have though you'll be sad because you can't be happy without being sad and it's I mean like you've heard that phrase how many times like you've heard it so many times like there's no happiness without sadness there's no light without dark and like you always like okay like it always just rolls off the head you always go okay do you know what I mean because if you're sad you're sad this said it and explained it and discussed it in such a brilliant way like across a page that it finally hit home like I was funny like yeah and it makes you think about stuff in your own life and I think it makes you feel a lot lucky more lucky it makes you feel very grateful I I'm really loving it I'm really excited to just sit and finish it tonight I've got about 110 pages I think it's gonna be five stars like although I've barely been reading sometimes I find when I'm loving a book I don't read it as fast because I just want to savour it and be reading it forever I mean this should have taken me a day and I've been reading it for like a week but that's okay sometimes you just need that to happen and then you can read loads I'm gonna finish it tonight and then I will give you my full eloquent thoughts in the morning I finished it and I'm giving it five stars like we've known that's gonna happen throughout the whole of this reading vlog really I'm really happy today yeah this is for all of us this is such a special important incredible book like basically what I was saying throughout about how brilliantly this handles mental health is just like it's just everything never have I read a book genuinely I can't I can't think of a time where I've read a book where it feels so magical like it's sprinkled with gold dust throughout in this magical library but also so based in reality and so realistic as well it manages to merge that fantastical world and the real world and real world issues so well like it does it perfectly I can't think of another book that has done it this perfectly I think if you are someone who mean we've all had battles and experiences with our mental health but if you are someone who has suffered from depression or anxiety I think this is such a brilliant important book to read it is gut wrenching like it is like heart wrenching whichever one of those is the right one I think it's heart wrenching gut wrenching both can be wrenched like it's so perfect like it's just wonderful I can see now why everyone is literally giving this five stars like I absolutely in love with it like I'm absolutely obsessed with it it was so beautiful and sad and happy and hopeful it was everything all in one it was like the human experience and the battle of this like life we lean all in one I mean like trigger warnings of suicide ideation suicide depression but also I think if maybe you are going through a bit of a tough time this for me really helped me mentally it really gave me a new outlook on a lot of things I think I needed so it was perfect like it was everything you know just being in this library with an infinite number of books on your life infinite number of possibilities with your old school librarian guiding you through it all and at the same time like seeing the threads of happiness and sadness throughout all the possible lives you could have had and like really emphasizing that regrets do nothing for you I really feel like Matt Hague is like a prophet come to teach me about life regrets don't do shit like we shouldn't live regretting everything really we don't know where those regrets could have led us I loved it I would really recommend picking this up if you've been debating it thank you so much again Molly for sending this to me I just adored it I think it's brilliant I would really recommend that everyone everyone reads this because it's brilliant that's all I have to say it's just magical wonderful just a talk it's amazing this wrapped up experiment video series has started off amazingly I hope you're enjoying it I have no idea obviously why I'm gonna unwrap next and I'm really excited for it so the next episode of this will be up next Tuesday but obviously I still have uploads coming Thursday and Sunday as well I had a lot of fun reading this and I can't wait to see what book I read next for this book series I hope you're enjoying it and I will see you very very soon in another video bye