 how to defeat the Narcissist and their monkeys. Before I begin please hit that thumbs up button down below so that it will help to get this message out there to other survivors as well. If you are watching this video I'm sure it's because you're dealing with not only a Narcissist but also flying monkeys and a spear campaign. And you may feel like it's just you. You may feel like you're alone which is why before I begin I want you to know that you are not alone. I did a video on this topic around three years ago which now has 160,000 views and there are many other videos by other YouTubers with a similar amount of views so you're definitely not alone. There are many people around the world who are experiencing the same thing especially if we consider the fact that most people are not even aware of the term smear campaign. They may simply know it as bullying and this is something that happens in schools and workplaces all around the world. It is very common so it's not just you. A lot of other people are going through this as well but of course that does not take away the significance and the seriousness of what you're going through and that is why I am addressing it in this video because I understand the significance of it. And it is very important that you receive this information and support. Now let's talk about the purpose of the smear campaign and why they are doing it. The purpose of the smear campaign is to isolate you. It's to separate you from other people especially those who may be able to support you to keep you alone without friends or help so that you don't have any assistance. You don't have anyone to give courage, faith or confidence to you to give approval or to be in favour of you or to be kind or sympathetic to you during this difficult time because they want to alienate you. They want to make you feel that you are different and not a part of a group so that you become withdrawn and isolated from the objective world which may then arouse hostility and indifference in you whether it had formerly been love, affection and friendliness and that is really the key point of this video because you've got to think why would someone want to do that to you? Why would they want to turn your feelings of love into hostility and indifference? The only possible explanation is because they are jealous and insecure they're resentful of your achievements, possessions and perceived advantages because unlike yourself they cannot be friendly or love and you should already know that about them based on how they've treated you because how you do one thing is how you do everything a person's habits and mindset will always cross over into other aspects of their lives so they avoid of love and happiness and that is why they bully you and as I mentioned in a recent video bullies tend to have a lot of family and relationship problems which is what they're projecting onto you and it's what they're trying to get you to identify with so that you act as a vessel for their pain which is why the isolation is very important because it gives them plenty of opportunities to punish and abuse you indirectly since you're always alone there's never anyone in your corner to witness what is happening or to act in your favour which is typically what abusers want they want you to be all alone so that there's no one for you to turn to and then they can do whatever they want to you without fearing the consequences of their actions because as far as they're concerned if you have no support network then they should be able to get away with it which is the type of environment abusers need to feel comfortable because they don't want to be looking over their shoulders every five minutes they want to know that they're in a safe space but they can conduct their operations without any interference or disruption because it is of the utmost importance to them it may seem as though they're just playing it off sometimes as though they don't really care much for it but that's because in a way they're actually quite ashamed that they have to do this narcissistic people prefer to see themselves as being superior so if they're having to tag along with you it's bound to make them feel insecure because normally in their minds they would see themselves as being above that but they're having to go along with it because they want to punish you and it is very important to them it's of great significance for them to have an effect and influence on you to the point where it's probably taken precedence over many other things in their lives because it means that much to them but if you take a step back you will be able to see the bigger picture which is that all they're really trying to do is push your buttons so that they can elicit an emotional reaction out of you because they want to affect you emotionally they are seeking your attention because they want to assert power and control over you which is all just their attempt at trying to compensate for their own insecurities and unresolved issues which they are trying to project onto you yet if you ever confront them they will play dumb and they might even say that they don't know what you're talking about which is just further confirmation that they're trying to push your buttons because denial and gaslighting are typical tactics abuses used to control their target to shift the blame and get a rise out of them because they assume that if they don't admit that they are wrong then they won't be held accountable for their actions but they're dealing with sensitive and annoying issues of their own and there are certain subjects that they would prefer to not talk about because it would make them angry or embarrassed and this is a persistent and recurring problem with them where it typically revolves around something that happened in the past which is usually from years or decades ago because they can't find anything that happened recently and really they are just like a justification for the feelings they have now they search for an excuse for their frustration because they can't regulate their own emotions so someone has to be responsible for how they feel which is why they will try to convince you that you are wrong or that you're not reasonable or rational and they won't stop until you agree with them it's only when you agree with them that they will then calm down which should instantly reveal to you the core underlying problem which is that they already know you're not wrong they just don't want you to not be wrong because then that would mean that they are wrong and they just don't want to be held accountable because they have ordered this anger and frustration and they're unable to regulate their own emotions they also don't want to deal with the consequences of their actions so it's much easier for them to blame you even though yes they know for you well that it's not you they are deliberately trying to mould and shape you into the type of person that they need you to be and it's so that they can absorb themselves of guilt, obligation and a punishment and that is why they are pushing your buttons and manipulating your emotions it's intended to change your character and behaviour that's the whole point of it to turn you into the type of person they need you to be so that it aligns with their false narrative because if that was not their motive they would be treating you very differently they would be trying to turn you away from anything wrong or inappropriate but instead it's like they're deliberately trying to guide you to a very dark place through the use of insulting and polite and personal questions in an attempt to provoke you into saying something inappropriate because they want to destabilise you so that you fail to maintain a calm and controlled attitude and then you may say something you shouldn't or they may ask you to do something that you really don't want to do they're getting involved in things that are none of their business and yet at the same time they're also dispensable of your thoughts, feelings and ideas and opinions they may ignore you or address you in a contemptuous way because they're trying to poke at your self-esteem they want to erode your confidence in your worth and abilities because they already know that it's them they know that the problem but they want it to be you so they try to turn you into something you're not by attacking your self-esteem because that is the most effective way to affect and change a person's beliefs and morals and if they didn't really approve of you because of your differences of opinion I'm sure they would choose to serve as an example for the type of attitude or behaviour they're trying to promote instead of personally attacking you and talking down to you because that really doesn't add up it doesn't make any sense for them to do that it suggests that they're really not even concerned about your differences or of anything you don't possess and in fact it reveals that they are envious of what you do have which makes sense because they will typically try to take away or destroy the very things about you that are positive and productive because those things do not align with their false narrative and instead it acts in opposition to what they're trying to promote about you so you see they really don't care about the truth they're just trying to paint you in a bad light and they're trying to brainwash you into seeing yourself in the same way so that you will act accordingly and then they don't have to see themselves as they actually are because clearly they're having difficulty controlling themselves they're passive aggressive they're trying to get back at you indirectly because even if they could find the strength to come out and address the real issue it probably wouldn't make any sense there wouldn't be any justifiable reason or excuse for why they do what they do which is why they don't ever try to confront it because they already know how it would make them look they would look stupid because there is no reason or excuse for why they do what they do no matter their possession or standpoint there's bound to be more suitable and appropriate things that they could be doing with their time but they just can't get over themselves they can't stop being so self-important they can't put things into perspective and they have an inability to put themselves in other people's shoes so they can't see things from your perspective which is how they're focusing solely on themselves and complaining too much about things and they're often thinking too highly of themselves because just by being in your presence it's too intimidating for them it immediately gives them an inferiority complex to where they look at you and they feel less in you so then they have to act like they're more important than you even though this may have never even crossed your minds you may never even have thought about who is less and who is more at least not until they began to attack your feelings of importance and try to make you feel less than who you really are because they deliberately went out of their way to do that to you when they could have just left you alone but they chose not to because they couldn't deal with their only feelings of insecurity to where they felt inferior to you so they felt the need to come to you to prove that they are better than you in whatever way to try to trick you into believing it because since they only have a false self their beliefs do not hold any weight your belief is far more powerful because you have a strong identity and sense of self you know who you are which is why they will try to use your own beliefs against you in an attempt to manipulate your feelings of perception so that it reflects back to themselves that they are superior to you and even though that's not true they don't really care as long as they can exist in this fantasy world inside their heads where they believe that it's true so all they're really concerned with is getting you to believe in the illusion rather than actually doing, being or having something real which is why your emotional reactions are so important to them and as long as they can assign, associate or indicate something of implied significance or relevance to you where you interpret it as something directed against yourself and you're upset or offended by it then in their minds they have won they have defeated you which is a very childish and immature black and white mentality but this is just how narcissists operate they've been this way since they were children and they never grew out of it they're emotionally stunted at the development of a two year old child but any time that they do manage to get an emotional response out of you it should only remind you that you need to work on your self-worth and self-esteem where you know who you are and you do not let yourself get affected by what they have to say about you because that's all they're trying to do they're trying to target your self-worth and self-esteem because they feel inferior to you so they're trying to pull you down to their level but when you know who you are and develop self-assurance and self-confidence they can no longer affect you as much when the narcissist targets you with a smear campaign you need to identify which relationships you want to keep and which ones you don't mind losing you might want to keep those relationships that you have with people who show good character especially those who are loyal and devoted to you because of course if you lost someone with those qualities it might negatively impact you while you probably wouldn't care too much about losing someone who is hateful, envious and always against you because someone like that clearly isn't going to be any benefit to you but for those who show good character, loyalty and devotion you might want to reach out to those people and explain your relationship with them and how it is important to you while also mentioning what you have been experiencing with a smear campaign and how the narcissist and their flying monkeys have been abusing you and you also might want to send them this video or one of my other videos on smear campaigns so that they will understand exactly what is going on because these smear campaigns promote narcissistic behaviour and as we know narcissism is very infectious it's contagious and it spreads so when you inform someone before they get contaminated it's like you're giving them a vaccination and this is highly effective if you've managed to do this before they get infected unfortunately if they've already been exposed to it it may be too late but whatever happens you should never try to manipulate or force anyone into taking your sight that's not what we do that's what narcissists do we must allow people to be themselves and to make their own decisions where they have the opportunity to hear both sides of the story and then they get to choose which side they choose to believe because this will then reveal to you who is your real friends and who you have a real connection with because if they were ever really with you they're not going to jump to conclusions about you and they're not going to immediately turn against you especially not before hearing your side of the story because that's something only hateful envious people do but you do need to be calm and in a state where you're able to conduct yourself appropriately before you decide to communicate with the people who you decide to keep in your circle because they may have already heard a certain narrative about you where the narcissists may have said that you're crazy or emotionally unstable so you don't want to come across as being overreactive and this may make them think that the narcissist is telling the truth about you so be calm and relaxed when you're communicating to them work on your insecurities focus on building up your self-confidence and your self-image to where it's constructed from the beliefs you hold about yourself rather than it being dependent on the responses of other people because during a smear campaign that's not going to serve you it's only going to cause you to lose sight of yourself because you're not going to be able to fight back against those other people's perceptions of you once they have been infected and brainwashed by the smear campaign it's all over for them they're already under the narcissist's spell so there is no going back for them they become a lost cause and you have to let them go and don't attribute any value or importance to them because they're never going to be of any sustainable use to you so treat them as though they're gone and they're not coming back because if they're already aware of everything the narcissist has done to you and they're still not on your side that just shows how sick and messed up they must be to still side with the narcissist after everything you've been through so by realising that it should make it that much easier for you to let them go because who wants someone like that in their life I would never associate with anyone who I know is deliberately going down their way to abuse and disrespect another person I don't care who they are they will not hold a significant possession in my life and they shouldn't in yours we need to set a standard for what we are willing to accept into our lives and anything like that should not be tolerated because we are worth more and it should just weed out another group of people that you no longer have to be concerned about you should not tell them what to believe or what not to believe you should not try to change their minds that is what narcissists do as in past we should let people decide for themselves and if they know everything that happened to you and they still side with the narcissist that should tell you everything you need to know it should tell you that they're no good if they think that abuse is acceptable I don't know about you but I will want someone like that in my life I only keep people who are considerate and respectful people who do not find pleasure or a source of power at someone else's pain and expense because people like that are high value while the people that narcissists keep with them are not although at some point in the future they may realize that you are right all along or the narcissist will discard them and honestly if they try to come back you are a fool for letting them back in because they already betrayed you the first time so if they find another opportunity they're just going to do it again they're not going to change this is their personality it's who they are they're not like us they have their own agenda they have their own thing going on which you should not willingly be participating in although yes they may try to get you caught up in that as well but you need to recognize the separation and the distinction between you and them and it's very easy for you to do that by identifying the fact that if it was the other way around you wouldn't be doing what they're doing you shouldn't make unfair judgments about someone when you don't even know their side of the story so that should reveal to you what type of people you're dealing with and you shouldn't care about their opinions you shouldn't need anyone's validation because you know your truth you know what happened to you so what anyone else thinks should be irrelevant don't let them gas like you thank you for watching if you found this video helpful please give it a thumbs up share your thoughts in the comment section hit the subscribe button to receive the notifications if you would like to support the channel you can donate at payble.me.narksabiver you can book a one-on-one with me on my website it's narksabiver.co.uk thank you for watching and I'll talk to you soon