 It's if it's gonna be a girl then you're thinking about how many boyfriends. I'm gonna have to beat up I can have to buy a shotgun. Yeah, I'm gonna have to buy a shotgun, hang it up on the wall What do you think? What are you already planning in your head about what kind of father you're gonna be and do you have good examples of that and Things that you want to stay away from. That's a great question So yeah, I think it's interesting so it's a little bit of a background of where we are So we're like eight eight months in basically Do date coming up in about six weeks. Yeah, and we are choosing not to find out the sex okay, so That puts an interesting spin on this idea of thinking about who I'm gonna be as a father because I think If I knew the sex that I would be thinking about specific events that I think are gonna be happening in the future Yeah, how those events would play out So thinking about so if it's gonna be a boy then thinking about like playing catch in the backyard or You know hot wheels. Yeah hot wheels. Yeah, whatever. Whatever. There's more You know what season of Power Rangers is gonna come out next basically what version of Power Rangers is gonna come back out next They're gonna do cops and robbers pretty soon eventually While West team Power Rangers something or so It would be nice if they did that they never touched that Opportunities. Yeah. Anyway, so then you know you think the other spectrum It's it's gonna be a girl then you're thinking about how many boyfriends I'm gonna have to beat up But then you think about like, you know, the tea parties or the dances, you know, whatever these, you know girly themes are right since we aren't finding out the sex it makes it a little bit more interesting of Trying to figure out what that means and so you've talked with my wife, so you know that you know gender roles aren't You know, hugely foundational and kind of hard of thinking like I I don't Necessarily think that if it's a boy he has to play sports or he has to play with hot wheels I think he can play with Barbies if he wants. Right, right, right. Or he could choose to Play Flute or you know, whatever you think are the the more feminine things that you know typically or if it's a girl She could play, you know, she could play sports. She could do, you know, whatever shoot guns. I don't know whatever So It just was an interesting aspect. So coming back to your question of you know, do I do I think about? Who I want to be as a father and kind of what what Context that comes in Yeah, I mean I think about it a lot, you know, I think about You know yesterday, we were we were sitting on the couch Watching some stuff watching the Preds game on TV and I was thinking, you know, it'll be fun here in a couple months When the playoffs are happening just having the the baby lay on my chest while I'm laying on the couch watching the Preds game Okay, you know other things that that may be coming up in the near future and then thinking, you know Longer term being able to take our kid to a game or share those experiences And I don't think that I just trying to catch up. Yeah. Yeah, so it sounded before that you were saying like I don't want to bias myself with a kind of father on and be based on the sex of the kid Yeah, it's easy to fall into the practice of like, oh, it's boy now These are on the list and these things are off the list. Yeah, you and in the process of trying not to be Biased you've discovered this whole other tier of things that are like Jess is important to you, but are in any way related to like the the sex of the the new member of your family in a sense Yeah, and you're also keeping both of these things open in the event that if we want to play cash We can play cash if I do sports we want to do sports if we want to play flu How is flute playing female? Don't you know some of the greatest food players are like I Was a band kid, okay, you know, it's just stereotypical that the flute and clarinet players are female Oh, this is not the case. This is not the case No, if you're a smart kid you play clarinet because that's where all the girls are but Right, okay. Yeah For okay, maybe maybe it was just my high school But for whatever reason it was like basically woodwinds are female brass or male. Yes, Russian is male male like Okay, that's sorry, you know, not that we did have one black kid who played the bassoon It was this giant woodwind. Yeah, like touch the floor But for some reason the bassoon players at my school were Asian, but I don't know Takes all kinds I do worry. I hear it's not so much a worry, but I wonder like Dear in the headlights moment. Mm-hmm. You get born and you're like, oh crap in in my heart of hearts, I I'm just totally not prepared for like any of this because I think when it's born right when a baby's born I have two little sisters, right? I Was thinking here. I'm gonna be a big brother. Let's go through the steps Yeah, but it just turns out to just be out screaming blob of flesh for like the first three weeks And then when the second one or when the second little sister came out I'm just like, I know I'm gonna go through it doesn't matter whether it's a boy or a girl either way exact same thing So there's a point before it even becomes and this is only from the brotherly perspective But before it even becomes like a person it is a project It's not mine It is related to me, but yeah, I'm developing a relationship with it with my sisters and I found that Because of that all these things that I had planned down the road are like shelved to deal with like this Relationship building exercise that I'm doing with this person that I've never met before So like I'm started doing things that I never ever thought about doing with like Like what what I had planned for a little sister like we do tickle face Things where I just like kiss around her face until she's like laughing stop Same thing like you had said and then just like rub the face and then she's like, oh, she thinks it's funny Like I would never have planned that out But that you now that's a thing that I do even when I see them regularly. That's cool. It's a weird thing. So like I guess it's a roundabout question, but like Are you prepared or how do you even prepare yourself for the random things that you'll do as you start to build a relationship with this new person that you think like I Mean given that was that a good move? Was that a bad move? Like are you even like is it? That goes on like so many different levels to me like on one sense I'm sitting here thinking like so you said how do you prefer for these random things? Well, there's a random things Because you don't do them until the moment, right? It's almost like an improv thing like you don't You don't think about doing them until you're in that moment So to me, yes, you know, that's like I can't really prepare myself for that but then you touched on that that second point of almost Thinking about it after the fact and saying like was that appropriate in a way or what you know, right that I Don't know like did I do the right thing in that moment? And that's that's like a whole different level of you know Thinking back on the actions that you take and how you determine whether they were appropriate or not And like to some degree you want to think about, you know, I assume to be kid. I'm like I Don't as I mean as long as it's not like super inappropriate, which I don't think I would do anything super appropriate I wouldn't but you know As long as it's super inappropriate Is there anything that you could do with your kid that would be the wrong thing to do in that moment like as a Parent at least in a newborn, you know, I mean clearly, you know, you get into later ages and we're kind of beyond objectivity here But I figure like the the the issue The vex is a lot of parents as as far as I could tell from the siblings of what my parents have told me is that you're always Thinking about what you could have done better Hmm and that seems to be something that's really hard to let go particularly for I imagine like brand new parents Just like today. I did this or like today We have an argument with the kid and I told her, you know, I Can't deal with you. You got to go to your room and you're thinking about that on a completely different level than the kids Thinking about it like the kids angry, but in five minutes. So she or he will be like I'm totally fine with it Where's my candy or like yeah worse food, but you're like I did that like four and a half years ago Is this coming back to me again? I mean I think what could I done better? I mean like you could always do something better, right? There's always a way to improve on a situation, but I mean kind of like we talked about something simply trying my best Yeah, I'm doing You're trying to do your best in every moment and doing your best isn't always going to be You know the best that that there could be in the world, but at that given moment It is your your best. It's still your yes And the other thing that I you know I thought about as you were asking that question is you know, I think it's it's about building those Relationships and having those experiences even if those experiences aren't always the best that they could have been later on in life Hopefully you and your kid are gonna be able to gather like look back on those experiences fondly and know that you know You were building this relationship You were building this great thing and I don't know laugh at stupid things that happened or you know Maybe make amends on things that went wrong or you know, whatever the case may be But I think just building those experiences, whatever they happen to be is is gonna be a great experience. That's so cool It sounds like this kid isn't just that the test I would say the capstone of growing up, but it's not just a new chapter and growing up. Oh, yeah, that's nice It's a very life-changing event to to have I mean I assume I think it's gonna be like I'm just pointing would be like, oh dang it. That was easy Wasn't that easy? Let's do this again. I Just It's like going back to college all over again, I know right. Thank you so much for the time