 Hey everyone in this video. I want to talk about How you should never Let a narcissist tell you who you are Never let them define you. It's basically like asking someone with no credibility Someone who's not even qualified to tell you who you are and you're just taking their opinion it would be like Talking to someone About narcissism And asking them what it is what it's about And they don't even know what it is. They've never researched it nothing They've never taken the time to really get to know it But just kind of like putting their own opinions into it. There's no Research nothing no personal experience so When you take a narcissist opinion on who you are all you're really gonna get is You're just gonna get more about them You're not gonna get any real feedback on who you are Because they don't even know you think about it like this When did they ever really take the time? To get to know you When did they ever sit down with you and ask you questions about yourself because the only way you're really gonna know anything about anyone Is by asking them questions Let them talk But if they never did that with you then How could they possibly know Who you even are and that's why you shouldn't Let a narcissist tell you who you are you shouldn't let them define you because all you're gonna get is more About them sad truth is a narcissist cannot tell you Who you are or who anyone else is they can't do that because They're completely self-absorbed and lacking empathy the only thing they can see is themselves You don't even exist in their world They didn't even see you as a real person You're just an object that they use for their own benefits So when you talk to them or when you take their feedback Just as you will with anything else involving them All you're gonna get is more about them That's really all you're gonna get because that's all they've got to give you Their world revolves around them. So there's really no point Asking them questions About what they think about you What they think you could change will improve There's no point listening to them when they criticize you if you just notice like all of the things that they say it's just You can tell they just don't even know who you are all they're telling you is Things about themselves That they're just projecting onto you and when you see that when you realize it Suddenly their opinions no longer hold any weight because then you realize all of those things they said about you It was never about you anyway It was about them They were telling you all of their fears and insecurities That's all it was But we take it personally. We think it has something to do with us And then we start running on that endless hamster wheel Trying to prove ourselves Trying to prove that we are good people And there's just no reason for us to do you to even do that anyway They already know you're a good person That's why they targeted you you really think they're gonna target a bad person And put themselves at risk of being a danger or harm no way They are experts at knowing who to target and believe me they always Target people who care and that's why Their tactics are so powerful against you Because you do care You care what they say you care what they think about you you care enough to make changes or improvements And that's why their manipulation worked if you didn't give a shit then Their manipulation would never work It's because you care That's like one of the number one qualities that they look for when they target someone. It's someone who cares Because think about it if someone doesn't care it's not gonna work If someone doesn't care you can tell them whatever you want. They're not gonna care. They it's because that's just narcissists everything they look for in another person is Is what they don't have So they don't care They're looking for someone who does care That's how it works They want someone to value their thoughts and opinions Because they don't value themselves But just don't let them tell you who you are don't let them define you You have to understand That everything they said to you everything they made you believe It was just their own fears and insecurities Because a confident person who knows who they are And really values themselves They're not going to talk down to you They're not going to criticize you Anyway, I just wanted to share that message with you They've got two permit premiers later today, and I'm working on something for tomorrow as well It's a really good one and also we have a new website as well I've got my blog articles on there, and you can also book coaching sessions for the website So check that out. It's dolly-dolly-dolly.narksurvivor.co.uk Anyway, it's really cold out here, so I'm gonna end this here and I'll see you in the premiere