 Good morning everybody. Welcome to week 13 of our class. I hope all of you are doing well. Welcome to all the students, both online as well as the e-learning students who've joined. Trust all of you doing well. Okay. I hope you do remember what we did talk about last week. We had started the entire topic on overcoming challenges. We looked through different situations in that specific topic and how there are challenges are a way and a part of life and how we can overcome them. So we looked at some principles. We looked at what are some of the steps that we can take to overcome these challenges. And we also looked at some biblical instructions of different life situations as well. Today we'll be the first part of our lesson. We will be doing yet another part of it of how we can release the past and move forward with whatever situation or challenges we've gone through. How do we release what has taken place and go forward, move forward. So if you're following through in your books, I'm on page 130 on the soft copies and 129 on the hard copies. So we're going to be focusing on how to be pressed forward by releasing the past. So last time we spoke about several situations that could come about. The first part of our lesson, we spoke about several situations that can come about that could cause conflict in a marriage relationship. And through these conflicts, they can be impending hurt, scars, wounds, pain, sorrow, all of that could happen. And some of the situations we spoke about was if there are unmet expectations, if there's abuse in the relationship, if there's unfaithfulness, if there is negligence, if there's abuse. So what we are going to look through this chapter is an encouragement to how do we provide or how do we move past what's happened. Move past the wounds and keep from allowing the pain and the hurt of the past to stop us from really experience God's best or God's goodness for us. So this is more a word of encouragement, especially for the ones who are wounded and so that we can press forward with what God has for us. As we had looked at the last time that depending on the situation that comes by, there's a lot of when challenges take place, when difficulties take place. What accumulates is pain or emotional hurts and wounds or scars from a spouse. And this can come through different ways, through words, through actions, through deeds, through constant criticism. Now all of this can be extremely painful and this is what leads into a person being scarred or emotionally hurt. But what we're looking at in this chapter is not allowing the pain of what has happened, of the challenges that have happened to keep us away from what is in the future or what promises God has for us in the future. So we look at how we leave past what has happened. So you release the past and receive healing for our wounds, for the hurt that's been caused, for the pain that's been caused and find strength in what God has for us and move forward. So we want to release the past, we look at releasing the past, receiving healing, strengthening our self and the Lord and moving forward. And as we learn to do this, the person we look to is God because he's promised to be the restorer of our souls, of our broken emotions, of our broken dreams. Psalm 23.3, he promises that. He says he is the one who restores our soul. He's the one who changes, who brings about, who repairs whatever brokenness that we are feeling. When we look through, we just look through some more verses and how it is something that God desires to do for us, Psalm 30.11.12. You have turned for me my morning into dancing. You have put off my sackcloth and clothed me with gladness to the end that my glory may sing praise to you and not be silent. Oh Lord, my God, I will give thanks to you forever. We also see that in Isaiah 61 verse 1 to 3, a prophecy about Jesus. It says, the Spirit of the Lord is upon me because the Lord has anointed me to preach good tidings to the poor. He has sent me to heal the brokenhearted, to proclaim liberty to the captives and the opening of the prison to those who are bound, to proclaim the acceptable year of the Lord and the day of vengeance of our God, to comfort all who mourn, to console those who mourn in Zion, to give them beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the Spirit of heaviness that they may be called trees of righteousness, the planting of the Lord that may be glorified. So through these verses, you see different pictures of how restoration takes place, healing the brokenhearted, beauty for ashes, oil of joy for mourning, garment of praise for the Spirit of heaviness. So it reveals that God is the one who does this. He is the one who heals. He is the one who turns around. He is the one who provides. He is the one who consoles. He is the one who replaces whatever has been lost into things that are, that can bring joy. So we see that God is our Restorer of our emotions, of all the hurt and the pain that we have gone through. So when we turn to him, we see that he comes and brings about this place of healing for us. How do we do that? One of the things that is central in our belief and in our faith in the Lord Jesus is forgiveness. Just like the forgiveness that's been given unto us, we are to release it to those who may have hurt us. And the central truth and belief in Christianity is about the love and the forgiveness of a Saviour who came for us since. And through that, he also encourages us to be in that place of forgiveness. So let's just read 1st John 2 9 to 11. If you're following through in the book, it's page 130. In the notes, it is page 131. So would somebody, page 131, would somebody read 1st John 2 9 to 11? And Luke 17 3 to 4, both these verses. 1 John 2 9 to 11. Shall we call the students? Yeah, go ahead. Can you listen? Can you hear? Sorry. Yes, yes I can. Yes I can. 1 John 2 9 to 11. 2 was 9 to 11. It reads if everyone claims I'm living in the light but hates a fellow believer that person is still living in darkness. Anyone who loves a fellow believer is living in the light and does not causes other to stumble. But anyone who hates a fellow believer is still living and walking in darkness. That person does not know the way to go having been blinded by the darkness. Thank you, friends. Can you also read Luke 17 3 to 4? Luke chapter 17 verse 3 and 4. If another. So watch yourself. If another believer sins, rebukes that person, then if there is repentance, forgive. Anyone if that person wrongs you seven times a day and each time turns again and asks forgiveness, you must forgive. Okay. Thank you. Thanks so much, friends. Right. So what we are, what we've looked at here is, as I said, what forgiveness can do. Now, even when we are hurt by others. There may be little that we can do to control the hurt that comes to us. However, what we have the possibility to control is to keep ourselves from being in that place of hate. Because we understand that when we carry hurt bitterness against someone in our hearts, it can be a difficult situation, not just for the relationship, but for us. And because of what we have seen as a model of what Christ has done for us. We cannot, as believers, we cannot be carrying that bitterness or that, that sin of hate in our hearts. Because when we harbor hate, when we harbor bitterness, we can end up doing things that will make us fall further. Right. We could end up doing things that could hurt others, hurt ourselves, as well as not stay in what God desires of us to do. So the, the medicine for hate is to be able to forgive the other person for the wrong that they have done. And we have the example of Jesus who was betrayed, he was put on the cross for nothing that he did. Right. Even for no wrong of his, he took our sin, even when there was nothing wrong with what he did and suffered pain for us. So when we look at forgiveness, it is a, it's something, it's a choice that we make. It's something that we choose to do. Forgiving is something we choose to do. It's something that we commit to doing, to release and to let go of the anger or of the bitterness or of the need to take revenge. Giving forgiveness, when we give forgiveness, we're not waiting for that time for us to be healed and for us to be settled. But we are doing it, knowing that that's, that's a command that God has given to us. So instead of keeping the anger or harboring the anger, we resolve it by releasing it to God. We resolve it by handing it over to God. So forgiveness also comes without any conditions. You are forgiving someone without the expectation that they will in turn do something for you. Right. Maybe in turn, for example, not offend you anymore. But we are forgiving because of the command that God has given us. And that's where we decide. That's why it's called a decision. Forgiveness is a decision. And it's not because we feel, whether we feel it or whether we not feel it, it is a decision that we do. So it's something that we extend, even though we are, we don't feel like doing it. So it's a choice. It's a commitment. It's an act of your will where you put forth the decision to forgive. So when you are forgiving, now, often there are times that people, you know, sense that when you are forgiving, you are more like a victim. Right. But the Bible tells us that we are testifying of the love of Christ when we actually forgive. And we don't have, in fact, it brings us freedom when we are extending forgiveness. Okay. So when you grant forgiveness to someone, you are choosing not intentionally choosing not to cling on to hold on to the offense that happened, which means even in conversation that you may be having with someone, you may be reminded of the offense, but you're choosing to not bring up the issue over and over again. And that's where you say, when I've released forgiveness, I also give up the desire to cling on to that offense, to sit on it, to bring it up at a later point of time as a weapon. So that's what is forgiveness and that's the power of forgiveness that we are choosing, we are committing. It's a deliberate action or a deliberate point of will that we're saying, I release this person and I no more will take the opportunity to bring back these offenses over and over again. Okay. So how do we release the past is by forgiveness, by choosing to forgive just like how we were commanded and taught to forgive. Okay. The next one is forgetting. So when we look at forgetting, we are choosing to forget. Now it's not as if you will not be reminded of it, but you are choosing to forget. So when we look in through scripture, there are very many verses which shows us as how God deals with our sins. It talks about scripture tells us, as far as the east is from the west, so far have I removed your transgressions or that he has buried it to the depth of the sea or he wipes away our offenses. He remembers it no more. So that's what we are called to do. So we may recall it may come to our memories, whatever happened, but we are choosing not to rehash it or to you're choosing to keep it aside, right? When you have forgiven, you're choosing to keep it away. So it also includes choosing to forget what has happened so that you're releasing the hurt, releasing the situation, releasing the past, releasing the offense that the person has done to you. So not only do we forget, we choose to forget and we choose to let go. We choose to let go. So letting go means you are, again, letting go of dwelling on the situation or on the experience in itself, you let go of that experience. So you're not allowing the hurt, the pain, the anger that is associated with that experience to become a heavy burden on you. You're releasing that to God, excuse me. You're releasing that to God and coming to a place to walk in that space of freedom. So just reading a verse from Hebrews chapter 12 verse 2, it says, Let us rid ourselves of everything that gets in the way and of the sin which holds on to us so tightly and let us run with determination, the race that lies before us. So you get rid of everything that gets in the way. So any time a memory or any time a hurt or an experience comes in the way of running the race that is led before us, it says we rid ourselves of it. Or Hebrews chapter 12 verse 15, it says, Guard against turning back from the grace of God. Let no one become like a bitter plant that grows up and causes many troubles with its poison. So what it's saying here is that when we allow bitterness to take root or it is there within us, it says it grows up and causes many troubles with its poison. So if there is that remnant of hurt, anger, bitterness inside, it's like keeping a bad seed in the soil. It will take root and it will grow to bring about a lot more of issues. So it is to let go of the emotions, the experience that in itself has caused us hurt. Another step of releasing the past and moving forward is to have the eyes of Christ in the way that we see the person. So if we have been wounded by our spouse and they have asked for forgiveness and they have repented, we are going to see them the way that God sees them. So how does God see them? It is completely forgiven, completely made new. So we are also acknowledging them in the way that Christ sees them, that is clean and whole without blanch. That's how we're saying that. To continue on with that, with the space of being able to release the past, it is to begin to engage actively in your healing and your recovery, especially from the hurts or the wounds that have happened. And one way to do that is to keep saying or confessing the positive that is founded on the Word of God. So what we're doing is we are looking and acknowledging for all that God has placed in us, even though at that time we may be really hurt or in pain. So we're declaring the blessing even in that moment, even when we are at our lowest moment, we're declaring the Word of God, we're declaring God's Word, like that God's Word which acts like a balm of healing in our souls and moving from there. So we're engaging actively. So what we're doing is we are willfully engaging in moving past. That is to keep looking for the promises that declaring the promise of the blessing, that we keep looking back at what God's Word says about blessing despite the pain that we are feeling. We are declaring the Word of God so that it can act as a balm to us. Then also is to be able to know that God is faithful to bring about newness in everything in our lives. That whatever has happened, whatever issues have happened, God is able to restore and bring back, to repair to its original position what things were. And some of the examples that we see in scripture and the most common example we know of is in Job, where Job's latter life was much more blessed than his first, because of the way that he continued to abide and stand in faith. Then another example you see is Joseph, where Joseph went through 13 years of slavery being put in prison, being betrayed by his own family, by his employer's wife, by other people who he did good to, the baker and the butler. All of that he was able to move past because knowing that God is the one who changes things. We see this even in David. David was being pursued by King Saul and he was living in the wilderness, living in caves and in places where he just was surviving. But from there, God brings him to the highest position in Israel as a king. So through all of life's challenges, we know that God's promise is to make all things new. And he's the one who restores us back to our original space, our original worth, fills us with confidence and restores back to us that space of dignity. So when we look more and more to God, keep our focus more and more on God, we continue to experience His healing, experience His ability to move past what has been challenging in our lives. So we were looking at this topic of overcoming challenges and we've come to that in these two chapters really focused on how we overcome challenges and move forward into the future. Any thoughts and questions now before we move to our next slide? Maybe I think the question that I'd like to put forth is, even when we're talking about the power of forgiveness. And the way that we see the command of God and how we are to obey that. So just a thought or maybe just a little bit to open a discussion. What has been your, maybe your personal experience? Yeah, so I think Sri Radha has brought that up. Sometimes I'm just reading her question. She said, sometimes it's very hard to release and move forward in certain, in these situations, what can we do? Okay, so yeah, that was exactly the question that I wanted to bring up. And I'm sure all of us have been through different experiences in life which has brought us to a place where we find it hard to release that forgiveness. It can be in our homes, it could have been among friends, it could have been trusted people. It's also could have been in times where we didn't even know that something was being done to us at ages when we didn't even have a choice about what was happening. And yet, maybe later on as we grew up is when we knew or we began to understand the pain of what the other person's done or the consequences of that. So yeah, Sri Radha, I had the same question. So what are your experiences? What are your thoughts? This is also to help and encourage one another because we've all been in this situation at some point or the other. Maybe some of us are going through it at this time. But how can we draw from practical ways? We know what scripture says. We know that God wants us to forgive, but yet in practical reasoning it is hard. So how do we move forward? So some thoughts. It's open for discussion. We have, I think this is a good thing. We have around 10, 15 minutes. Let's just open this for discussion. Everyone, come on. What are your thoughts? Yeah, something that I would like to share for what I learned about forgiveness is like maybe a few years back there was this particular person. I couldn't forgive and it kept coming all over again. Like when I pray, you know, before getting communion or something, I'll go pray, Lord, I forgive this person and I'll receive communion. And then all over the thoughts will come back when I see and again, before I could forgive something, the person does something else. And then it was harder and harder. So I had to remember, oh, this year, this person did that and Lord, this year, this person did that. And it keeps coming in 2006. This happened, Lord. In 2008, this happened. And then when it came to 2012, it would have been a number of things. It was so difficult and I was asking God, Lord, I know you want me to forgive and forgiveness is not just in one sentence. Lord, I just ask forgiveness and keep taking communion. It hurts me, Lord. I know it's wrong, but I'm not able to because by the time I come over something, something else happens. And Lord helped me, helped me and it was ongoing. It was ongoing. And then one day, like I just cried out to God, Lord, it's something that I am not able to bear it because it was reflecting in every other areas of my life. It will affect the way I behave with my husband, the way I behave with my daughter, everything it was affecting the workplace. And Lord, I cannot take it anymore and help me, Lord. I just cried out to him, Lord, no matter what, I just released this person and whatever that person is up to, you deal with that person. Lord, you speak to that person because you love that person and that's why you want me to forgive that person. So then I released at that moment the joy and that I received. I was thinking that, you know, I'm going to lose something, but the joy that I received from then, the Lord has been leaving me so differently. Many blessings were at least in my own personal life. I did not realize and I'm not forgiving that person. I'm withholding God's blessing over my life. He's righteous God. He's a loving God. I could see a lot of blessing in my life and I just walk in that fate because the more we release forgiveness, the more we enjoy God's grace, His presence, His fellowship and He will take care of us. He will remind us what to speak, how to deal with that person. He will give us wisdom. We won't become the same old person to, you know, like get fooled and like allowing ourselves to God will show us, you know, this is the way, this is the way just move from speak this person. So it is God and He will take care of us. So but it was very difficult. I agree that it was very difficult but with the power of the Holy Spirit. And when we have our relationship with Christ more than anything else above all that precious, we will enable us. He loves us and He'll take care of us. Thank you, Jack. Thank you for sharing that wonderful. Good. I hope that's the testimony that I have given us. Jack, you're sharing the testimony. Anybody else wants to share? What did you do personally to release forgiveness? So one thing that I've realized is that when we are, you know, when someone has offended us, the more that we, I'm using the word concentrate, but I think there's a better word you can use. But the more that we dwell, I think that's better one, dwell on the wrong of what's been done to us. As a result of the person, the more we look at like and, you know, in our minds, we have so many thoughts that run in our head. And very often these thoughts are like, you know, children in a playground. They are running here and there without any order, without any structure, without any discipline, and that's sometimes how the thoughts are run in our head. And a moment, a trigger moment is enough for us to get into this place of unorganized thought. Where we're always, once something catches hold of us, hold of our mind, we're only thinking about that. And so the more we dwell on it, in the sense of how could the person do this? Didn't they know? What were they thinking? You know, it goes on and on and on, that chatter keeps going on and on and on. It kind of builds, I think even in our brain, it builds a certain pathway. You must have heard of neural activity in the brain. It builds a certain pathway in the brain. And the more that we think of it, the more embedded, the more stronger, the more intense, the more ingrained it becomes. But when we choose, and then so we're choosing and we're deciding and saying that, okay, does this dwelling on this person or on the thoughts about what has happened, does it really help me? Other than it making me miserable, it making my relationship with this person miserable, it's bringing about anger, sadness, guilt, all of that. Other than that, what good does it do? And often we sometimes choose not to forgive because in our minds we think, if I forgive the other person, it will appear as if what they have done is excused. Okay? But that's not true. That's only the way that our minds, it's a misconception of our thoughts. But when we forgive, more than it helping somebody else, it helps us. It's like this, I heard a quote once that said, unforgiveness is like swallowing poison and hoping that it will kill the other person, the offender, the person who's offended you. But actually not. You are being slowly destroyed by that unforgiveness. Now, I totally empathize and understand how hard it is, especially depending on the gravity of the situation to forgive. Especially when something has been done to you, even without your knowledge or your permission, you may have been an innocent victim in that. But God has given us the ability to reason, to know what happens when we don't. So every time we dwell, we put our focus on the situation around the person over and over and over again. The case builds higher and higher. So one of the things is choosing not to do that and saying, as it says here, right? Looking at the positive, then the negative. So we are choosing to alter our mind from the offense to something else. But then the question again will come, but the question keeps coming up, but he did this, but she did that. And then you choose again to move aside. So to keep doing that is a practice. I know it's not a one-time process or a one-time change, but it's something that happens frequently, regularly over and over again. So choosing not to dwell, not choosing to keep thinking about what the offense of the person was, but choosing to let go. Also looking at what it means when you are not in a place of forgiveness, how much it messes with your own life. How much it creates wrong thought processes in your own life is something that again moves you to act or work out differently. Any other thought, anybody else? Anand, Prince, Rin, Ravalli, anyone else? I'm sure all of us have had some experience that can be helpful to the other. Nina, anyone? Nobody? Okay, Srirada, I hope that answered some part of your question. Oh yeah, and of course, the fact that forgiveness cannot come just only because we will it. It's the Holy Spirit that He's the one who guides us into all truth. He's the one who convicts us, right, and His work in us will enable that. So if you have reached that end point of saying, God, I can't do this, then it is calling on the Holy Spirit to work on behalf of you. And I'm sure He does it because that's God's will. That's the will of God that we forgive one another. It's His will. So He works in us according to His will, right? So if you are in that place, you've tried everything, done everything, then it's, you know, come to the Holy Spirit and say, God, it's your will that I forgive. And I know it intellectually, but I don't want to. I don't feel like it. Help. Help me to change parts and processes in me that will bring you that. Okay, Srirada, hope that helped. Okay. All right. So shall we just close? We'll take a break. I know we're around three, four minutes early. It's okay. We'll come back at 11 o'clock. We'll close for a break now when we come back at 11.