 Good evening, creeps. Tonight your mystery playhouse presents Nis Leslie Woods in an Inner Sanctum Mystery. The title, A Ghost in the Garden. Now we're at your door, Mr. Host, so open it, won't you? Good evening, friends of the Inner Sanctum. This is your host inviting you in through the squeaking door. Come on in. Come in. Join our happy little community. And if you're not very careful, maybe you can stay. We see you out. It's happened to some of our nicest people, and believe me, they've never regretted it. As they always say, it's a place to rest your bones. Remember, ours is the only community that has no taxes, no housing problems, no inflation, and no politicians. Of course, it might seem a little dead to you, but that's the idea, isn't it? Ha ha ha ha ha ha. First, we get down the brass tank. And I do mean the ones that go around the edge of a coffin. Huh? Oh, don't sneer. I've heard better jokes myself. But remember, he who laughs last laughs best. And brother, when we in the inner sanctum laugh, we're laughing last. Meet Laura, a nice girl in her 30s who had an uncle and worried about it. It was a pleasant life at Green Tower. It was pleasant being mistress of the huge time-worn house and the brittle acres that surrounded it and the money that came in regularly. Always. It was pleasant being married to Tony who was very handsome and very gay and who, they said, had married me for my money. Well, perhaps he had, but he was fond of me anyway. I'm sure he was, even though he was younger than I, but only a very little younger. It was a pleasant life until Uncle Edward came home. Tony had gone out to the village, I think, to pick up something or other. I was alone. Tony, the door's open, darling. You know I never lock it. Do you have a nice time buying things, Tony? And who, my dear Laura, is Tony? Oh, Uncle Edward. Yes. Well, I haven't returned from the grave, my sweet. I didn't think you had. Hello, Uncle. That welcome could very easily be warmer and still not be overwhelming. I've been away a long time and for a change, Green Tower seems attractive. Does it? Which is rather a pity. What do you mean? Selling it. You're not going to sell Green Tower? Of course, because I need the money. Uncle, you can't sell Green Tower. Well, it's mine. Of course I can sell it. But... And who is this Tony? Tony is my husband. Oh, really? Well, my congratulations. And I take it he thinks you own Green Tower. Yes. And thinks you have money as well. Yes, Uncle. I... I could have sold someone in the garden. Uncle, please. Still, if it's so infertily dark out there, I can't see. Might be some burglar fellow. He was standing with his back to the room peering up to the garden. Uncle Edward, who had been away a long time and who had come back at last to shadow my life. He was not a very big man, my uncle. And when I came close to him, I realized that he was barely as tall as I. Uncle... Can't make out a thing. Blasted shadows. He was looking out into the garden for an imaginary burglar while I stood behind him. With the old French paper knife my mother had left me. I tried again. Uncle, please. Now it's no use, my dear. No use. Go away and stop bothering me. He didn't even turn around when he said that to me, which made it quite easy when I... Stop! The knife went in smoothly. It kept on going into his back until I thought it would never stop. But the handle blocked. Uncle Edward's body stiffened for a moment and leaned back intolerably against the knife. He groaned. After a moment, I bent over. He was very silent. As silent as the dark garden. As silent as death. My uncle had come home more than he knew. He wasn't very heavy. And he didn't bleed at all, which was nice. As I dragged him through the French doors into the softness and darkness of the garden. I hurried because Tony was becoming homeless. The ground would be softest on you, under the rosebud that I loved so. It was there that I dug a grave for uncle. And it was there that I buried him. Under the lovely roses that would bloom again and again. Not knowing or caring who lay beneath them. There was the sound of our car pulling up at the front door, but I was finished. Uncle was under the roses, with the paper knife still in his bag. And I... I was in the drawing room, at the piano hall, when my darling came in. Oh, my love. Oh. Oh, Tony, my dear. Anything exciting happened while I was away? No, Tony. No. Nothing ever happened to you. Nothing. It's pleasant having breakfast in the garden, isn't it, Tony? Mm-hmm. Except for, um... Look. Just so. Or went back. Well, he's a very nice old man, but he does talk a lot, and... Ah, good morning, good morning! Mary, what a lovely sight you two make charming! Thank you, Mr. Stokes. Well, Laura, your roses are almost as lovely as you are. Ah, they're much lovelier, you know that. And where is your Uncle Edward, this fine woman? My Uncle Ed... Oh, Lori, you upset your coffee. Oh, yes, I did, didn't I? That was very careless of me. I... Uh... Well, Mr. Stokes, I suppose Uncle Edward is still abroad. Oh, my dear, my dear, I saw him. Last night, here. Here? Well, uh, on his way here, anyway. I was driving. He was quite late. I saw him coming down the road. Oh, it wasn't Uncle Edward. No? No, well, isn't that funny? Well, I thought I could have recognized him anywhere. It wasn't Uncle Edward. Well, yes, of course. You know better than I, of course. Well, I must be getting out of here. Well, that reminds me. Mrs. Stokes, you'll have my head if I don't hurry back home. Goodbye, goodbye, goodbye. Goodbye, goodbye. Who's, uh, Uncle Edward, Laura? My... my uncle. I couldn't guess that. Oh, yes, of course. I mean, my... my... my... my mother's brother. A poor relative? Um, why do you ask that? Well, you seem so upset when Stokes mentioned his name. Oh, well, uh, he is a bit. He, uh, he... he's funny. I wouldn't have liked him. No, no, I... I don't think you would. So, isn't it lucky it wasn't Uncle Edward? Is that you, Tony? Yeah, I'm going down the road to the car. Do you want to come along? No, dear. I better go through this mail. Ah, good old mail. Lots of checks coming in, huh? Lots of them, darling. Say, Laura... Yeah? Oh, why aren't you using your paper now? My pri... Oh, oh, it... it needed cleaning, and I... I sent it away to have a clean. Oh, it was a pretty thing. I'm glad you haven't lost it. But I... I thought I noticed it around last night. No, no, I sent it away a few days ago, uh, when... when I... when it's time. Uh-huh. Well, uh, see you later. Bye. Bye. Until later. And please, Tony, please forget about my paper knife. Please, Tony, forget about it. Hey, hello. Hello. You're busy and me, son. The me? Finding a way to come in? Well, uh, no, I'm not at all. Very nice. Very nice. We like it. Yes, you do. Now, where's Ed Cheney? Ed Cheney. You can tell him his old pair of bravers here and waiting. Oh, well, I'm... I'm afraid you've made a mistake. What kind of mistake? There's no Mr. Cheney here. Look here, my girl. This is Green Towers, isn't it? You're Ed? You're Laura. You're Ed? And tell your Uncle Ed I'm here and waiting. Well, he isn't here. He got here sometime yesterday. Asked me to come here today. But I'm here. I, um... I'm terribly sorry, but, um, he's away. He's abroad. He is not here. Oh. That was Mr. Money. Oh, he... he does. Yes, 5,000. I see. I don't care what I say or not. What I care about is the money. But I... I wait for him. Well, you... you can't. You told me he was coming yesterday. Today hasn't come. No, it hasn't. That way. Oh, well, it... it might be very awkward. Um, I suppose... Yeah? I suppose I gave you the money. Yeah, but you're right. Then you would go away. You wouldn't wait for Uncle Edward? I'd go away. All right. I... I think I... I may have it here. I... I always keep a... Quite a bit of cash, aren't I? It's expensive, you know, I... Yes, yes, I do have it. And, uh, here you are, Mr. Trail. Thanks. Well, you didn't count the money. I trust you. And you? You know, I like this part of the country. Do you? Yes. And I've just changed my mind. What about? Going away? I'm getting on in years. Maybe I'll spend the rest of them here. You said you'd go away. I did, didn't I? That was before you gave me the money. Well, you... you... you can't be very long on that. I... There'd be more, won't there, Laura? Hmm? Well, I'd better be running along. I must have a nice place to live, near the village. But, Mr. Trail... You see, I and Leruncle Edward did come here last night. And, uh, he didn't owe me any money. I was trying to get a job from him. But, uh, this way is even better. Au revoir. Ah, gents, it's getting late. I'll be gone. My new little gray home in the west, eh? That is nice. Thank you, nice. Oh, man, train will be back, though. Buy all the drinks you can stand. Hey, good day. What you want? I said what? Don't you stand there looking at... Hey, that's nice. Put it in the back. Well, you're all here waiting. What's the matter, you brave or something? Oh, you are. Then, suppose you crawl out from under that sofa and listen to the tale of Laura, who planted her uncle Edward under the rose bushes in the garden with her favorite paper knife in his back. A Mr. Trail tried to blackmail her, but one dark night, Mr. Trail lost interest in worldly matters, lying down on the street with a knife in his heart. The next morning at Green Towers. Good morning, Laura. Good morning, darling. Got a message already? Too hungry to wait. Pull up a chair and go to work. All right, I will. What's the matter, Laura? You're a bit pale. I'm all right. I, uh... Tony, who put those roses on the table? I did. They're blooming. I know how you love them. Thank you, darling. Hey, uh, terrible thing in the papers this morning. Oh, what? Man stabbed to death in the village. Really? Mm-hmm. Strangely heard about it. He was at the village bar, throwing a lot of money around, walked out. Somebody evidently wanted the rest of his money, so, uh, he got a knife stuck into him. Well, how dreadful. What was his name, Tony? What was his funny name? Hard to remember. Oh, yeah. Now, trail. And that's what it was. Laura, what's wrong? Oh, nothing. I do think those roses have given me a headache. Their odor's so strong. Oh, that's a shame. Well, I'll get rid of them. Oh, will you thank you? I'll go and lie down for a while. Maybe my head will feel better. Yeah, you'll do that. Yes, I... I may even be able to sleep together. What's not wandering about the room? Oh, I'm, uh, I'm just a bit restless. Got your, uh, paper knife back from the cleaners yet? Paper knife? Oh, no, no, not yet. It's been taking him off a long time, isn't it? Hope they haven't lost it. I hope not. Tell me. What? There are no roses in this room, are there? No. Well, then why is the odor of roses so strong? Laura, I'm worried. Why? Because there is no odor of roses in this room. Good night, Tony, darling. Laura, are you sure you don't want me to stay with you tonight? No. I'm on to your own bedroom. You're not looking well. I'll be all right. Well, yell if you want me. Good night. Good night, Tony. Good night. I'll be all right, all right, if only the roses will go away. Every sweet odor of roses always in my nostril. The deadly decaying odor of roses always in my nostril. Oh, how good to think I was asleep. And it was, it was nothing. I have to get out of bed and see. Now there's nobody in the garden. Nobody at all. Oh, there's a plum tree just as it always is and the vegetable patch and the lawn where we play croquet. And, and, and, and there are the rose bushes too. The rose bushes. And out of the rose bushes, the man is standing up and is my uncle. No. Tony, Tony, what did that doctor say? The, the consultant about me? I don't know. He's stopping by in a little while. He seemed a very strange man. Oh, psychiatrist. I mean... I knew he was just a kind of darling. Tony, do you think I'm... Of course not. Because it's only that I smell roses when they're all in the hut. You're not crazy, Lauren, for heaven's sake. That must be the doctor now. Now you'll be a good girl. I'll see him and I'll be back very soon. You try to sleep. Yes, darling. Odors of roses are so terribly strong. I thought, I'd like to ask if I got out of bed. And, and lay down on the floor where the fresh air and the air conditioning machine was strong. Perhaps there I'd be more comfortable. But, and from what I thought it was funny as I crawled about a bit on the floor, on my hands and knees, until I found the place where the fresh air was supposed to come from. Then, then I began to laugh. And I laughed and I laughed. That night I waited for the mist to set, and I went downstairs into the cellar. Straight to the air conditioning machine, which kept the house so fresh. And there, in front of the blower, which drove the air through the pipes into my bedroom, I found a little bottle. It was a lovely little bottle, with a crest on its little fat belly. And the words after a rose on it, the brothel you see was open. And then I knew that I wasn't mad. And I also knew that the time had come for me to find my paper knife again. Brought to you a break. Thank you, darling. Um, put it down, I want to get that glass. All right. Hey, had a good night? I had a wonderful night. Tony, I think I'm going to be well again. Good. Help me out of bed, darling, will you? Sure. Just put your arms on me. Uh, there. I'm up. Oh, don't be in such a hurry to take your arms away, darling. Hold me, coach. Oh, Lord. I forgot to tell you all. What? My paper knife came back. It what? Yes, I have it now in my hand. The hand that's behind your back, Tony. What? Yes, Tony, here is my paper knife. You can take your arms away from me now, Tony. It was quick, Uncle Edward, but I think you'll die anyway, Tony. Yes. Give that to me with these hands. Maybe. Oh, no, Doctor. For I found the bottle of perfume you placed in the air conditioner. But you were using to drive me mad. Bad luck. Very bad luck, darling. You saw me kill Uncle Edward, didn't you? You were the one in the garden, weren't you? Yes, I saw you. And then when Flail came, you knew about him and you killed him, didn't you? Of course. Couldn't afford to have you give him money. Money. It was going to be mine. Oh, Tony. Oh, Tony, didn't you know it was yours anyway? Everything I had was yours. Why did you have to torture me and try to drive me crazy? You would have cracked it. And the money would have gone to Uncle Edward. But you didn't, Tony, did you? Play it safe. Because now you're dying. And when you're dead, I'm going to bury you with Uncle Edward. Right in the garden under the road. I've already told everyone that you're going away and you are. But not very far. Although it's far enough, isn't it, Tony? You've won. Thank you, darling. And you've lost. Listen. You know what that is. It's an amdant for you. Why? You're mad. Yesterday, two doctors signed a certificate of lunacy. I ought to know. I am not insane. I can prove it. The older of roses is the faker. I can show them the perfume. I can explain it to them. Then how will you explain me? If I prove I'm sane, they'll hang me. And I don't want to be hanged. If I say nothing, they'll think I'm insane, and they'll send me to the asylum. And I don't want to go to the asylum. And they won't go away. That's the end of poor Laura. With a handy girl with a paper knife, but who didn't do so well with her spring planting. Oh, and while I amble down to green towers to find out whether Laura is spending the winter in a padded cell or at the morgue, let me give you a bit of earnest advice. Never plant your uncle in the rose bushes if you're allergic to pollen. You might get a bad case of slave fever. You might get a bad case of slave fever.