 I'm always happy to be here with Gregory Bahanian. Just a joy to talk with you, Gregory. And today, I wanna particularly celebrate that your book just recently, I mean, this month was published. And so we'll talk about the journey to creating the book, but also the book's contents itself. And yeah, your experience of writing it, publishing it, and what it's like now. But for those who, just a little bit of context, Gregory is part of my ABC client group and also a helper in the program. So has been just a wonderful presence in the group for so many people. Gregory, I'm gonna let you practice your introduction as we do around these parts, and then we'll get into talking about the book, et cetera. Thank you, George. Always a treat to see you. So I'm Gregory Bahanian, I'm a transformational life coach and I support individuals, couples and groups and enjoying a more healing and empowering orientation to life, which is really cultivated from the inside out. Nice. And yeah, we'll talk about that as we get into the contents of your book. What does that mean to have a healing orientation and inside out? So first of all, congratulations. It's a lot of people, I think a lot of people watching this are either aspiring like they want to write a book one day or the second group are the people who have started writing a book and still working on it or set it down and haven't picked it back up. So you could speak to both of those groups. And of course there are others who, congratulations to all of you who have actually published the book. Yeah. So start with the journey of your experience of writing and publishing the book and then let's get into the book's contents as well. Sure. And I'll add to my introduction and as part of it, because it comes forward and part of my responding to this that one of the areas of specialization that is supporting people in bringing projects that have heart like a book or a record, songs, poetry, whatever. Somebody has a project that has heart that they've been intending and for some reason haven't gotten traction with. That's one of my areas of specialization is to support folks in actually bringing it from concept and inspiration actually into completion and delivery. It's beautiful. And yeah, exactly. And you're walking your talk, so. Yeah, yeah. So in response to that, what I recognize, I was just chatting with someone yesterday about this idea. I, as George, you know, I have a master's in spiritual psychology and one of the things, and then there were advanced programs after that. And one of the things with fellow coaches studying soul-centered coaching, we talk about, and this is not exclusive to this group of people, but to anybody who's coaching, really, we are our own first client, you know? It's like we, and I would imagine it holds for most fields, you know, where there is a service, consciousness, a service provider. We discover areas that we have challenging territory with. We discover some solutions, how to navigate that territory. And just like when we see a good movie and we wanna turn people onto it, it seems it's a natural thing to go, oh, I'm not the only one who gets stuck around this territory. Maybe I can support other folks. So with the book, I'll say one of the things that for me was a huge game changer, because I've had different books come forward in my consciousness as things I'd like to share about over the years, where I haven't moved on it, I haven't engaged, but I discovered this wonderful authentic marketing coach. I can't wait to hear what's coming up next, because I'm eager to learn from that person myself. Yeah, yeah, yeah, you should see, yeah, yeah. Really, I'll give you this contact information. Thank you. One of the sort of foundational, it's really present with me today, like as we were coming into the meet, I was like, boy, this is really where it's at in terms of everything to me, which is in the three stages of authentic content creation that you teach and model, speaking of being one's own first client, you model all of this, the sort of primary thing, which is very spiritual psychology for me, is approaching writing of blogs or creating of vlogs as an iterative process, so that the stage one is shared with a very light touch. It's like, this is something, whether one is a therapist or a coach or a horse trainer or whatever the thing is, ooh, this is something that I really find useful when I'm working in the corral or whatever the thing is, and I would imagine that other horse trainers will find this useful, whatever the territory is, but then approaching it really with a light touch as distinct from what I think a lot of writers, my impression is a lot of people who have a creative sensibility and get is that perfectionistic part that wants to get to the end before taking that proverbial first step, the journey of a thousand miles starts with the first step, and you hold such a welcoming, honoring space for the wisdom of just take a first step and do it lightly, because even if we take that first step, I've never heard you articulate it exactly this way, but it's implicit in what you model, even if we take that first step, once we, you know, a light touch stage one piece of content, we're gonna get feedback from our universe. Some people are gonna be enthusiastic, there's gonna be a lot of responses, maybe there's gonna be no responses, but whatever that feedback from our universe is, it's just information. Doesn't mean we're brilliant, it doesn't mean we're stupid, it doesn't mean we have anything to do with worthiness, it's just information in terms of what people may have an appetite for, and then from that, we can course correct and engage with our next step, whether we want to explore the same subject from another angle or however. So this whole notion of it being an iterative process that can be refined to me speaks to sort of a cornerstone principle in spiritual psychology, which is approaching life with a learning orientation. And as soon as I move into the questions about what's the lesson in this, what's the learning available here, then I get out of my way and I start having fun. Beautifully said, wow. I love the, yeah, you're developed, you're sharing concepts that our heart knows, or perhaps our higher self knows, and we forget all the time because we see other people's results perhaps. I mean, even some of you watching this, you're like, oh, Gregory wrote a book, wow. Okay, that's gotta work hard to write my book or whatever. And so maybe, Gregory, you could tell us a bit, how do you, how do you, the way you wrote your book, how might it be different than what the traditional notion of book writing, let me take a few years off, let me take a year off, or some people do it fast, let me take a month off or whatever, and they're like working hard, and they're writing from morning to night, and then they have to go through weeks or months of editing, and how is it different, how is it different than what, yeah, to share anything about that you like? Yeah, thanks, and I would like to share about that. I wanna add one more piece that comes forward in what we're talking about, which is that it's really our ego, our mental and emotional condition self that gets involved in the perfectionistic sort of things that can stop us. But our heart or our soul, in my experience, is just seeking expression and experience, and it's seeking expansion to discover, you know, and so anyhow, and I feel like one of the reasons I so vibe with you, why so many people I believe vibe with you is because you hold a very inviting, gracious, hospitable space, George, for folks to honor what is authentic, which to me means what is coming from the heart, what is sincere in intention, what is honorable and true in terms of our highest, you know, in intentions for sharing and being a blessing in people's lives. And so yeah, so you invite authentic expression. For me, the process modeled in the blog to book a course, which I am still taking in my consciousness. I took it a year ago, but I'm still leveraging the recording. Yeah, absolutely. And thank you for mentioning that. Yeah, it's those who don't know, you know, it's I did teach this course and Gregory not only took it, but applied it. And here we are, right, with the book, but yeah, it's beautiful. I mean, I saw you go into it like step by step, which is really inspiring, yeah. Thanks. Yeah, and so for me, the process was very organic and very light and very pleasurable, because basically rather than coming from a mental level, sort of strategizing or trying to figure out what the plot points or the structure or any of those things upfront, rather than all of those things that I've attempted once or twice before, you know, to map out, but the truth is my experiences, my heart knows what's present in the now, in the moment, and is not strategic in that way. So my writing process was basically me showing up three to five times a week with a commitment to either do a video or an article on whatever was present with me, that I was either navigating or that I was reflecting on as being really valuable to me in terms of negotiating life and whether it was my relationship with my wife, my relationship with my work, whatever the particular thing was. I did that for a year with videos and articles and Instagram carousels, and then I went back in and I started to catalog or categorize the different themes. I placed them in different categories and I realized that thematically there were three different categories. Each one could be its own book. This happens to be the first book and the book since we've mentioned my book and we're celebrating this as a reference point is called Accessing the Wisdom of the Heart, Reflections on Awakening, and I think it's appropriate that it's the first book because it's largely setting the tone for what I believe to be at least for me and it seems to serve the folks that I work with. Our primary business, which is our inner territory and as Ron and Mary Holnick say, doctors Ron and Mary Holnick say, the issue, the things that disturb us or are challenging for us, the things that disturb our peace are never the issue. The issue is how we're going to relate to ourselves and our circumstances while we go through the issue. That's the issue. And yeah. Yeah, beautifully said, man. And one of the gifts in the book, I love this, is that at the end of each chapter, readers can click on a link, especially those of you who are reading this on Kindle and there's gonna be a paperback version as well and paperback readers can just go to the link. Paperback's not out yet as of this recording. It'll be about two and a half months out. Yeah, exactly. So anyway, whenever you're listening to this, you can go to the end of any of the chapters in the book and go to that link and get a video supplement to that chapter. And if you have been enjoying the way that Gregory shows up, your energy signature, Gregory, if you've been enjoying the way that Gregory shares heart and advice, you're gonna love this because every chapter has that gift. That's, you know, you can access. And so Gregory, I mean, there's a lot in the book and readers will enjoy a lot of it. You tell amazing, just like simple and meaningful heartfelt stories that educate about particular concepts, help the reader reflect on their own life at the end of each chapter. In fact, there are reflection questions for the reader. Are there any, you know, out of the several dozen principles and stories in the book, are there like, is there like one or two, maybe one for now, actually, is there one that is particularly, something you wanna share today in this call? Sure, thanks. There's a couple that come to mind, but I'll share one and see where we are. Now, and I appreciate the framing, the introduction of that and would like to add one piece to that as I, before I share the example, the book is called, as I mentioned, accessing the wisdom of the heart, Reflections on Awakening. And I, in my coaching and in my workshops and in the book, I don't kid myself that the gold is in me as the coach. Hopefully I bring value as the coach, but what I'm grateful for as an opportunity in anything that I do is holding an invitation for the reader or the workshop participant or the client to discover the real gold and the real gold is to be found in the wisdom of the reader's heart. And so that's why I introduce a theme, we explore a particular way of dropping beyond the limitations of compensatory strategies that we may have developed as a kid that can be really limiting and into the expanse as the image on the book cover shows the expanse of our heart's wisdom. And one of, one story that comes forward for me in this moment that I share in the book is smiling because I always marvel, my wife is such a, she demonstrates so much mastery on so many levels, has an unbelievably generous service consciousness that she models. And when we've been in December, it'll be 25 years our being together. Yeah, yeah, I'm very grateful. Congratulations, that is, wow. And, yeah, modeling this, right? Thank you. Yeah, yeah, thank you. Thank you. And in the first year that we were together, occasionally I'd noticed that she was triggered about something, not, you know, blowing up or but I'm sensitive, I watch and listen and I could see a little contraction, a little something in the eyes that would suggest that something just disturbed her. But she wouldn't say, for example, hey, what the, and I need to talk. She would be very like gracious and gentle. Unlike you, I mean, that's how you're like me. Exactly. And well, both of my parents were psychotherapists and I don't think I've ever shared that with you, but they were, and I was kind of taught that when there are issues, one talks them through. And oftentimes that's very valuable to talk things through but she had this other like sort of mystical alchemical skill that I'd never experienced in anyone before which is I'd see that little bit of a something and then she would say, I just need a few minutes. And she'd leave the room, she'd come back five minutes later and it wasn't like she went in the room and then said, oh, I'm gonna show him. I'm gonna really good. She'd come back and she was in her heart and she was complete. And I could tell she was neutral. And I would ask her, are you okay? Do we need to talk about it? And she would say, no, I'm good. And she was genuinely good and the thoroughfare of loving flow heart to heart between us had been restored. Whatever momentary disturbance might have obstructed her ability to be present and in her loving with me was restored. And at first I just kind of scratched my head and marveled. And after, I don't know, six, eight months, I finally said, what do you do when you go out of the room? What do you know that I don't know? I wanna learn, because that's amazing to me. It is, like more humans need to do that. Yeah, well, and me. And so she began to introduce me to a practice that she had started learning as a child at age 11 in a spiritual community that she grew up and she started to teach me about self forgiveness. I had never heard of self forgiveness. I'd never heard the notion of self. I understood the idea of forgiveness. I always understood forgiveness was a good thing. I never quite understood how in a sort of meat and potatoes or tofu and, you know, for the vegans. Tofu and kale, yeah. Thank you. Exactly. How, like in a very practical way, how to work with forgiveness. I had had at that point eight to 10 years of therapy. So I had had forgiveness. I had brought compassion to different parts and I had grieved losses and so on. But I didn't really know on my own how to, and to reference a roomy quote, roomy says something to the effect may not be word for word, but it's something to the effect of your task is not to search the world or seek the world for love, but rather to seek within and identify the barriers that you've faced against it. Wow. And in spiritual psychology, we're taught that that quote with the addition and then dissolve them, meaning dissolve the barriers. And the barriers in essence are the judgments that we place. When we're running, when we're running some, whether it's about ourselves, another circumstance, God, the universe where we're running things shouldn't be this way or it was supposed to be different or maybe it's pejorative language that shows oh, she's such a or he's such a or they're such, whatever the thing is. If we can identify in our upset, in our humanness, in our egos conditioning, identify what's the language that I'm running inside on a mental level, it's a key to unlock our greater freedom. I like to think of it as when we're triggered or we're upset, like the dashboard of a car and the brake light comes out, I don't curse the car. I go, oh, that's valuable information. Now I need to look under the hood, take it into a mechanic and or fix what the address the off. So if I'm feeling angry or irritated or so on, to me, it's the dashboard coming on. Most of us, the way our ego is set up, we're conditioned, trained, and our ego is trying to keep us safe to manage the trigger. So most of us spend our time trying to teach people how to behave with us or perhaps express reactive or destructive reactivity as thinking if I can just vent, they'll know how hurtful and then they'll, but it just kind of perpetuates a cycle of judgment. So what I've been taught and what my wife modeled for me is rather than as tempting as it is to go to the trigger, to say, ah, my peace is disturbed, how metaphorically, as my wife did literally, can I excuse myself for a few minutes and take some time looking at what's going on inside under the hood of my own consciousness and then extend compassion and empathy to what are oftentimes much younger parts that are feeling unsafe or hurt or violated or whatever the thing might be and then giving them a voice and then extending forgiveness. I had a pastor once talk about years ago, when we forgive, we're giving up one thing in favor of another, that's forgiveness. And really what we're doing in my experience is we're giving up our condemnation or our judgment in favor of returning to our innate well-being, loving, joy, and the peace that's available right underneath the anger and the hurt, which is that loving foundation, which is the essence in my experience of all of us. It's worth rewinding folks and listening to that again. Wow, thank you, thank you for that. And thanks to your wife for sharing that with you and for coming with us, essentially. There's a lot more in the book. I hope folks will, if you're inspired by this, you gotta check it out, get the book. And like I said, there's a video at the end of each chapter you should check out as well. Gregory, thank you so much for the presence, the loving and wise energy you bring into the community, wherever you are, wherever you show up in my courses or sessions or groups or just on social media, people are lucky to have you there. Yeah, thank you. I will be sure to put the link to your book and your website below. Anything else you wanna say to the folks here watching as we conclude? Yeah, I think, first of all, thank you so much, George. As always, I feel so, you're such a gracious, hospitable host in every interchange and so I'm just grateful, thank you. And I would say as a sort of a completion to our get together as a message, if you are in the entertaining stages of considering or leaning into or if you've worked on something before, it's really doable, it's really accessible. And to reiterate what I said at the beginning that I learned at USM in spiritual psychology, the value of having a learning orientation as a fundamental approach to life and then what George models in having an iterative process, approaching things with a light touch, just even sometimes I find myself even in the publishing because I'm still learning as I'm going through the Kindles now up and then I'll be publishing the paper. Even the publishing, for me, I've had to remind myself as there have been some little things, corrections to be made, I have to go, it's an iterative process. It's okay for it not to be perfect. In fact, it would be mighty surprising if it all was perfect. So I would invite you, if you're watching this, if you're a content creator, solopreneur, to give yourself plenty of space for your own humanness, for your own learning process. I've been so ignorant in so many ways about these things and I just show up as a student and sometimes I feel like I'm learning to tie my shoes and I've only ever seen Velcro and I'm kind of overwhelmed and then, but still I'm learning, I'm learning and the feedback response and early success of the book and my experience of feeling encouraged to start holding space for the next one is a demonstration, at least for me, this is doable. So all the best with whatever projects you might be bringing forward. Yeah, thank you for that, thank you for that. That's very encouraging and true. So thank you so much, Gregory, for your book and just the way that you bring your nurturing energy to others. Thank you, George, thanks.