 The Narcissist thinks you're stupid. When you first let the Narcissist into your life, they thought you lacked intelligence and common sense. They thought you were an idiot because they already know they're no good. They already know they mean you know well. And this is a determining factor in whether or not they will come back to you because they don't want to be around intelligent people. They want to be around people who they think are stupid. So it all depends on how you respond. After everything you've been through with them, because once you've been involved with them, there are lessons to be learned. You should be examining what you did wrong. You should be correcting your behavior so that you're no longer the same person. Because you've learned the lessons. You're not doing the same things that you used to do. So you're no longer susceptible to their manipulation. They don't have the same amount of influence or control over you as they did before. But some people will keep going back to the Narcissist, even after everything that the Narcissist has shown to them and done to them. You need to make the necessary changes to your behavior. And then the Narcissist will notice that you have changed. You need to recognize your worth. You need to recognize your own importance. But when you do that, the Narcissist isn't going to like you anymore. And you will lose a lot of friends because they're looking at it like you think you're better than them. But you've just woken up. You're no longer under a spell because you've gained more experienced knowledge and good judgment. So now you're not impressed by things anymore. You no longer share other people's opinions, values, beliefs and tastes. Because now you have different interests. Now you have a different view and general attitude to life. So you're not eager to be together with other people. But you used to be very different. You used to be on hand and ready to respond to their requests. Even when they weren't treating you right, you were still trying to help them. And the Narcissist remembers how you were with them. That is the mental snapshot they have of you in their minds. So that is how they respond to you. That is how they see you. And that is why they think they can take advantage of you. That is why they think they can do these things to you. Because they remember how you were. And they assume that you're always going to be that person. So even when you make the necessary changes, at first they're not going to accept it. They're not going to accept that you've changed. They might think that you're angry about what they did to you. But in their minds you're still the same person. They're not going to see that you've changed until you get rid of them. Until you stand your ground and go into contact. Otherwise they're not going to think that you've changed. Because you were once so kind and generous. You trusted them enough to allow them to have certain things that belong to you. And they took advantage of that. They never valued or respected it. And that is why they saw you as someone who was weak and stupid. And the only way that they're not going to see you as weak or stupid is if you oppose and resist them. Because then they're left with no other option than to respect you or leave you alone. The Narcissist thinks you're stupid. Because they got one over on you. They fooled and deceived you. But if you want to show the Narcissist that you're not stupid. You must recognize their manipulation and be aware of it. You must gain more understanding. Because otherwise they're just going to hurt you. They're just going to steal from you. And they're not going to have any respect for you. They're not going to give anything back to you in return. They saw your kindness as a weakness. As an act of stupidity. And they took advantage of your willingness to help them. They manipulated you. They tricked you. But they don't see it that way. So you must stop it from continuing. Because this is not serving you. It's not adding value to your life. It's not building you up. It's not making you a better person. So there's no need for you to be involved with them. They shouldn't be a part of your life. Because all they're going to do is leech off you. They're just going to constantly take from you without giving anything in return. You have to learn the lesson. You have to make the necessary adjustments to change yourself and become stronger. So that you're not making the same mistakes. You must evaluate the nature, ability and quality of the people that you choose to be involved with. And be aware of the manipulation. Develop an understanding of it. When you do that, the narcissist will no longer think that you are stupid. They will see that you have wised up. They will see that you have become more aware of what they're trying to do. And they won't try to mess with you anymore. They won't try to come back to you. And this is why narcissists leave and never come back. Because they realise that you've realised your own value. You realise that you deserve better. And they're not going to stick around. Just so you can hold them to your standards and expectations. Just so you can expect something back in return from them. They will abandon you very quickly. Because responsibility is the narcissist's kryptonite. But if they're still coming back, it's because they think you're stupid. They think you're unaware of what they're trying to do. So you may need to make some more adjustments. You may have some more work to do. But realise that when the narcissist discards you, it's not because of anything you've done wrong. You don't need to change or try to do more. They left because of everything you did right. You stopped giving in to them. You stopped tolerating their behaviour. You started to choose yourself. You realised your own worth. And that is when they won't want anything to do with you anymore. They will run off and find someone else who they think is stupid. And then they will play the same game again. But when they think you're smart, they're not going to return to you. Thank you for watching. I hope this video is linked with you. Please like, comment, share and subscribe. If you would like to donate, my PayPal link is in the video description. Coaching inquiries, you can email me at coach-it-and-arch-surviver.uk. Thank you for watching and I'll talk to you soon.