 Okay guys welcome back from the break next speaker out last speaker of the day second day That's gonna be Zach Bauer from date hotter girls He has new to the 21 convention, but I know his business partner and good friend best friend Maybe oh, yeah, put him on the spot. Oh, yeah, that's right. Oops. Oh, it's all good Rob is spoken twice. He spoke here last year in Orlando. He also spoke in London recently Rob is then at a standing job and he Very strongly encouraged me to get Zach Bauer on and now that I've met him. I'm very happy that he's here From New York. I think one of the best dating coaches in the country Zach Bauer Thank you What's going on guys it's good to be here all the way down in Orlando, huh? All right, so I'm I realize that like you guys have been here for a while because everyone can hear me. Yeah All right, so it's probably been a long day So, you know what I want to do is I'm just gonna tell you a little bit about What it is that Rob and I do and why I think that it's a little bit different from a lot of the other stuff That's out there right now and how this can be used to your advantage and I'm also gonna tell you a little bit about where I came from and You know how I basically got to where I am now so that you know I have the pleasure of speaking at the 21 convention in front of you guys and You know I promise that's not gonna get boring. I'm gonna keep it short and finally I'm gonna give you guys What we found what Rob and I have found to be you know a system that we've developed for ourselves So that we can go out and get very consistent results Whenever a girl that we're attracted to is in front of us and that you guys are gonna be able to go out and hopefully use tonight Tomorrow and every day going forward So I guess you know just to start off I Think like the like the first thing that I want to like share with you guys It's kind of where I came from you know, I was just an average guy You know nothing special nothing really wrong with me nothing really special But at the same time, you know, I never really questioned my dating life I never really questioned the girls that I was ending up with and you know I was okay, you know once in a while I'd have a girl and you know It wasn't really by choice, but you know a girl would she'd like me and it would kind of work out and you know kind of drift along like that and You know this kept going on and in college I would see some of my best friends just you know hooking up with all the girls that I wanted You know and I would end up with their friends or you know, whatever came along And you know it was really frustrating because I you know I knew that there wasn't much difference between me and my buddies and Just night after night these guys were getting home the girls that I wanted and you know It was a real pain in the ass But you know that being said like I didn't realize that there was anything wrong I didn't know that I needed to work on myself I just figured you know this is how it is and this is how it's gonna be like you know I'm gonna get what I'm gonna get and you know might as well just keep going on with my life Well that all changed when you know, I moved I graduated college moved to New York and pretty much had no social circle I had no girls to introduce me to their friends I had no guys going out to meet friends for me to meet you know the friends of their friends and You know, I realized like you know shit like I have a big problem here either I'm gonna continue going about my life doing what I know how to do best which is you know Just do me or I'm not gonna end up with the girls that I want I need to do something here and you know at this point I started going out a lot and I started you know trying to meet up with guys that I saw We're getting good results with women now ultimately this Braille look this brought me to meet my buddy Rob Who maybe you guys some of you might be familiar with you know Rob and I wrote four elements of game together and You know, we started going out. We developed a very very very close friendship We started going out pretty much every day for about three years and you know, maybe like some of you guys We studied some of that mystery method. We studied some of the other systems out there We read a lot of these e-books and you know, we bought into these promises that like there's this magic line that you can say and you'll just have girls bouncing off your dick, right and You know, I mean, it's almost embarrassing to say it But like I swear to God like I believe this right I read those books and like I sat there and I thought like holy shit like this is why I haven't been getting the results That I've wanted my whole life, right? It's something that like I haven't been doing I haven't been doing it, right? So I guess at this point was this was like the best and the worst thing that ever happened to me now The reason that it's the best thing is because the one thing that I did take from this stuff was that yeah I might not be great with women But there's a whole shitload of guys out there that every day are going out trying to figure out and improve Their skills of meeting dating getting women attracted turned on whatever So everything else that I took from it, you know, how to open girls how to get them attracted All that stuff I can honestly say standing on the stage today was absolute bullshit like Like a lot of that stuff actually made it worse And I went from a place where I could get girls that would come across my way to where girls would come across my way And I didn't like I would literally repel them and the reason that this would happen would be because you know Rather than just be myself and you know, I know that that's like one of the biggest cliches ever And you know, we'll get we'll talk about that and what that really means and you know How you guys can actually do this because I want to preface this by saying like there's a lot of other stuff out there where it's a Lot of philosophy and a lot of feel-good stuff But it doesn't actually tell you what to do when the girl's standing there in front of you so that she ends up in your bed That's another problem that we found with a lot of these dating, you know Dating the guides and you know different systems was that it was so heavily focused on how to begin Interactions and how to get girls giggling and laughing that it never really addressed the issue Which was why I wanted to get in this in the first place She was you know to take girls home and have sex, right? I mean, is there any guy in here who has a different goal than that when it comes to meeting and dating girls? Exactly, like do you get like is there anyone in here who cares about how you open how you build attraction? Does anyone really care about that if it doesn't get you girls? All right another question has anybody in here spent a lot of time worrying about how to open or how to build attraction Yeah, I was there too like I spent a whole year wasting my time trying to do that stuff and Like I said, I bought in probably harder than anybody in this room into this myth that there were these guys out There that had this like secret, you know the secret Routine stacker, you know whatever you want to call it They had these magic lines and these special ways of like of doing things where they could pretty much go up to a girl Who was with her like her husband her fiancee and steal this girl off this guy's arm and leave with her and you know run off into the sunset, right and You know it was that dream Honestly that really got me to where I am today because I would meet guys that you know Maybe you guys have you know been on some of the internet forums and it's like oh this guy really he's really good He really knows what he's talking about or oh like you should have seen my friend He's so good so you know Rob and I were going out and we were spending a lot of time like trying to meet these guys Trying to figure out what they were doing what was working for them so that we could you know do it ourselves You know I mean it's pretty simple So whenever we'd meet up with these guys that were supposedly so good with women We'd be watching them and you know like maybe like some of you guys Maybe you see some of us dating instructors and you see them and you know you hear us talk to you And you think in your head you have that voice like maybe this guy really doesn't know what he's talking about or maybe this guy like doesn't really get the results that everybody thinks he's getting and You know the fact is is that when we started meeting these guys It was really hard to fight that truth that we were feeling inside that like what these guys are doing does not feel congruent to who I am and I also don't see it working very well when I meet up with them I would go out with these guys expecting to be blown away and these guys would give me excuses about why they couldn't approach About why it wasn't the right time about you know some kind of social value or some you know They had a thousand different ways to rationalize it So You know Rob and I realized like this is bullshit There's got like we know guys that are far superior with women that are not in this dating advice community We went out we started still like you know hanging out with these guys Putting a lot of focus into you know what we were doing and what you know, they were doing right So along the way we started getting great results and you know we started teaching programs We started getting guys out on live programs And this is really where date hotter girls got its start people would go through other programs And they would realize that they were so they were taught a lot of stuff about how to begin interactions a lot of stuff How to do like these silly handshakes to build like what people are calling Kino and you know all this stuff to escalate right? But no one was teaching them how to close the deal right no one's like going no one is going out there and showing guys If you expect this girl to have sex with you You can't be doing these things that you've been doing before you ask her to go home with you Like what girl is gonna want to go home with the guy I mean I think Nick was talking about this a bit what girl is gonna go home with the guy They can't shut up and just look at her and hold strong eye contact right now not to say that Like I necessarily agree with everything that Nick said but at the same time You know that stuff is pretty on point as far as things that actually are real and have a true effect and The fact is like now I'm gonna take it back and tell you a little bit tell you an embarrassing story about you know Where I was with this a couple years ago a couple years ago. I was at a bar with Rob This was maybe three and a half years ago or so. I was at a bar with Rob You know we were just starting to like you know get a reputation and the fact of the matter was I knew in my heart That I was not that good with women right guys were looking at me and asking me questions and for advice And you know I gave it to him But the fact was like I knew that I hadn't had those ridiculous moments that you guys think that I had had you know Like I wasn't living those crazy fantasies that I believe that all these pickup instructors were living and so you know I knew in my heart that like this like this just something wasn't right I was still doing these scripted lines the whole thing and you know this smoking hot blonde She walks into the bar and she's with this huge jack guy that speaks French like this guy no homo He's super good looking and you know like he's real charming and you know we all just kind of start talking So I look at this blonde girl and I start talking to her right I mean this girl was literally like everything you could imagine she was like taller than me even so she was like six One plus she had heels on she was like made up to the nine like you know platinum blonde hair like boobs pushed up You know up into her face pretty much and you know I just I got that feeling like oh like yeah like that's that girl like that's the one that like I've been doing this for like I can't wait to talk to her you know and I had this delusion that all this stuff that I've been learning until this point was gonna somehow get me this hot girl When she was in front of me, so what happens right? I look at her I make eye contact I smile she looks back at me she smiles and I say hey What's your name? She tells me her name and from there. I'm like oh yeah like this like this might be on like I think I have this right So what do I do? I go into the fucking bullshit pickup material that I've been reading on the internet I tell her about my stripper ex-girlfriend how she stole my Maserati and Picked me up from the airport in a stolen Maserati and how we got arrested and you know I mean maybe this story sounds familiar. Maybe you guys have read this one on the internet You know and the fact is is that the second I started saying this it all fell to shit right the girls looking at me like You have a stripper ex-girlfriend and I'm like no no no I swear I really don't right because what who wants a guy with a stripper ex-girlfriend that's gonna brag about it Like that's not what a girl wants You know Nick was talking about this a little bit like you have to give girls the experience that they want if you're gonna Successfully take them from a stranger to back to your room and having sex and I'm not gonna lie to you It's of it's not easy right so that's why you know You really need to be creating an experience and leading it in a very like a very very succinct way And not give yourself you know many much room to really mess up and if you do mess up because the fact is is that this happens all the time and I'll get into this when I start giving you guys exactly what I do every time when you know I see a girl that I want The fact is is that you know you have to understand that you are gonna mess up You know there like there is no perfection and the difference between what Rob and I came to understand and what everyone else That's out there on the internet and the stuff that you guys have already been reading the main difference is that you know When it comes to this pickup material, I'm sure you guys can relate right? It's all predicated on giving you the perfect line so that you never mess up so that you never fuck up Right so that you always have the perfect thing to say right? I mean does this sound this sound right? Yeah, I mean does it if not like let me know but I mean this is this is what we found You know all of this materials predicated on I'm gonna tell you exactly what to say and it'll work in every situation Now the fact of the matter is is that that's all wrong and What Rob and I realized and when we went from a place where we were having trouble getting girls to a place where girls were you know Basically suggesting that we go home together The difference was was that we weren't playing to avoid those rejections. Okay. This is really important What we were doing was we were playing for the wins and The difference between this is is that we weren't saying things to girls worried about whether or not it was gonna mess up We were saying things to girls with the hope that it would go well Okay, and that's why that's the foundation of what I'm gonna be talking about and the system that I'm gonna be giving you guys the first and most important piece of what it is that we're teaching right now and what it is that we're doing right now is called damage control Because the fact of the matter is is that no matter how good your line is or how good looking you are or you know How much money you have or whatever there's gonna be friction in an interaction, right? I mean, that's just that's just how it is if there's no friction in an interaction Then you have absolutely no emotional connection with this girl. This is this interaction is going absolutely nowhere and The thing that's funny is you know, maybe many of you guys can relate if you're already out there You're already talking to women. It's really easy to do well when the girls in front of you laughing and you know Everything's going well, right? Like how many guys have felt that it's like, you know, it's like the girls with you It's kind of on you know, and you kind of know what to do from there, right? But it's the times when you know things are going tough the times when the girls not Necessarily having a great reaction to what it is that you're saying where you have the opportunity to demonstrate who you are and Also take control of the interaction and lead it back to a place that's conducive for you and her ending up in your bed together At the end of the night, okay? So the fact is is that when I go to approach a girl It doesn't matter. I'm not looking for what you like what you guys are probably like think I'm looking for right? I'm not looking to get a positive reaction from her. I'm not looking to get her laughing The only thing and this is the first step of what I'm going to give you which is our Farrah system Which is basically like what it is that Rob and I are doing right now And this was basically what we learned we were doing after watching about a hundred or so hours of infield footage of ourselves We figured out that what we're doing is something very different than what we even thought we were doing two years ago and What we're doing I'll give you a quick rundown Farrah stands for focus emotion rapport and arousal Now if you notice, there's nothing about opening. There's nothing about attraction. There's nothing about escalating. None of that Okay, and the reason is this because when I go up to a girl and I'm trying to you know build some sort of a Dynamic that's gonna let me move it towards sex I'm not trying to open her. I don't want to spend my time opening her That's a big waste of my time who here has like a really good opener Okay, let's hear your let's hear a good opener. Okay, this does sound like a good opener, okay So where does that lead to like just that it like just out of curiosity like just tell me like where that's gonna lead to Okay, so basically like that's like does anyone have else have any other openers that they like that they think are good openers One I like to use is you when I come up and ask an Indirect question like hey, where's the nearest pizza shop right when she starts talking you stop her and say oh wait stop Look, I really didn't come up to ask you where the nearest pizza shop is. I'm right now. I just wanted to say hi to you Okay, yeah, all right so basically like You know both of those are fine The thing is and what we really found when we started going out and getting really really strong reactions from women Is that none of this like none of the openers that you've ever read are gonna work if she's not looking at you And she's not listening to you right Right, I mean like you can walk up to a girl and you could say that to her But if she's not looking at you she has her back to you It's not going anywhere, right and I know that this sounds obvious, but you know this this goes a lot further I mean we have students every single weekend who I see they walk up to girls and they say hey You're cute. I wanted to meet you or like you know I had to come meet you or you know Whatever, you know, whatever question is it's supposed to lead to some kind of funny conversation and they're saying it too soft They're saying it without getting the girl looking at them and they're saying it without the girls full attention, okay? Now one of the things that's so important you hear all the time people are talking about eye contact, right? Like oh, it's important to have good eye contact. You got to have good eye contact. Well, why? The reason that it's really important to get good eye contact is because I mean you guys are looking at me right now Like I see all of you guys. I have your full attention except Nick in the back who's kind of daising off But seriously though like you guys are looking at me right now. I have your full attention So the first thing that I want to do and that you guys should be trying to do is Instead of focusing on begin a conversation with the girl open a girl whatever it might be The first thing that you guys need to focus and act like you know Actually go out and consciously do is get a girl's full attention. You need to get her full focus on you Okay, does anybody have any questions about why this is different from going up and opening? Okay, well, I guess when you say get her full focus on you I keep thinking of you know that show I saw on MTV the pickup artists were mystery would go up to the To the bar next to the lady and he would just kind of look away and say something to her and Then just keep walking, you know, see that's that's my point. That's exactly what I'm talking about not doing That's the kind of stuff that was getting Rob and I zero girls You know why because we'd walk up to a girl to bar We'd say something to her we'd walk away and then we'd be nowhere near her as you know And then girls look like lost for forever, right? So what I'm saying is what I'm talking about and something that if any I don't know if any of you are familiar with any of like any of our infield footage But one of the things that we hear a lot about our infield footage is that we we work really fast and that we're really really aggressive And the fact is is that I don't even see it that way The way that I see it is is that we are just doing things that are so different from what everyone else is doing right now that It's just like they don't see what we're doing right and what we're doing is we're coming up We're tapping girls on the shoulder turning like waiting for them to turn around locking eyes with them And and not saying anything not saying anything because the fact is is that you don't want to say anything Nothing not an opener about jean shorts not anything about a pizza place until you have this girl Basically waiting to say what what do you want? You know because it's that expectation It's that like that pause that quiet that you know that moment that you guys share before you say anything That's gonna really begin this interaction on an emotional and sexual level And it's gonna really give you the control because it's gonna start the interaction off from a place where the girl saying What what's gonna happen? I'm waiting for this guy to you know Give me a reason why he tapped me on the shoulder or why he's staring at me like that and take took me by the hand And pull me in now this is very different than walking up and trying to say something to a girl Trying to ask her a question You know and the thing is is that we found it doesn't matter that jean shorts opener phenomenal Pizza place great doesn't matter But if you do either of those things and preface it by tapping her on the shoulder and waiting for her to lock eyes with you And just taking maybe a two to three second pause before you drop that line or before you tell her about the pizza's place And you add in a little bit of a smile think about what this interaction is like gonna physically look like I'm not talking about what to say to a girl This is on such a different level because you're not communicating with the words right you're communicating on such a Subliminal level you're communicating in a primal sexual way where this girl is basically being baited into waiting to hear What's gonna come out of your mouth and you drop it with a little bit of a smile with strong eye contact and slowly and Anything you say is gonna sound sexual whether it's about jean shorts a pizza place And the fact is is that you know if you know if you guys have ever heard about direct openers Everything is a direct opener when you tap a girl on the shoulder and stare into her eyes Okay, you don't need to say I think you're cute and I wanted to meet you you can ask her her favorite pizza place Because you are being so direct you're being so emotionally direct with this girl That it doesn't matter if you're talking about a pizza place or you're talking about You know a pool party that you want to go to it's going to have sexual undertones guaranteed guaranteed So then you know this leaves like we haven't even talked about what to say yet, right? And already you've kind of built this sort of you know this this experience that's gonna snowball from here so this kind of takes us to the second piece of the puzzle which is you know emotional investment and You know a lot of guys and a lot of people in this industry talk about how important it is to get girls attracted How many guys have gone out and tried to get girls attracted before? Yeah, I I did I tried that for a long time, and you know what I realized Girls don't want to meet a guy who's trying to get them attracted girls want to meet a guy Who's already attracting them girls don't want to like you to come up Come out of nowhere be a fucking loser and start giving them these really great lines that kind of like make her say wait A second. I was so wrong. This guy's not a loser. I do want to bang him. Yeah It's like that's not how this goes Okay, and the fact of the matter is what I'm talking about here does not focus on looks or money or age I mean, I swear to God We've had students that are you know you see him walking around with the girls now and yeah He's too fat for her and yeah He's too old for her and too divorced or too, you know, whatever but he still has that girl and You know, it's the other guys on the street that are saying he's too fat for her. It's not himself And that's the difference is because instead of trying to get a girl attracted I use put me out in a bar tell me to go try to get a girl attracted I am going to fail miserably because I don't have the first idea about how to get a girl attracted Who's not already attracted what I do know how to do is create an experience that every girl wants to be a part of and Ends in having sex and that's what we're moving towards right now But I want you guys to understand that this begins not with you know opening or conversation or getting attracted It begins when you get her focused on you if you can hold a girl's full focus Then you know, I mean that's all it comes down to it gives you a very very good stage That's been set for you to then transition this relationship back to the bedroom. Okay, so Like I said the second piece, which is emotional investment. Excuse me one second Okay, so emotional investment Nice So basically what's the difference between emotional investment and getting a girl attracted? Okay? Emotional investment is when a girl wants to find out more about you when a girl is intrigued by you When a girl likes the things that you're saying and she wants you to say more of them when a girl enjoys your presence And you know will do things like tell her friends. Oh, no, no, no I'm fine. Just go to the bar without me because she wants to be around you because you make her feel good. Okay Now this is a very very simple thing to do and a lot of the time guys like, you know A lot of our students will ask well, what does it look like? Well emotional investment is very very simple all it is is When the girl starts asking you questions about yourself, right? Have you guys ever been out of the bar and had a girl say? Oh, you're funny. What's your name? Is anyone ever heard that before? Yeah, okay, that's emotional investment right there. The girl's beginning to become emotionally invested in you Have you guys ever heard girls say wait, so what's your name? You guys ever heard that one? Okay, emotional investment. I mean we're not talking about like quantum physics here I mean this stuff is very very simple, so you know rather than just tell you okay So, you know step one get her focus step two try to get her to ask you questions I'm gonna tell you one of the most effective ways that Rob and I have to get a girl to begin emotionally investing. Okay, you guys ready? Using statements. We have this we have a technique that we call conversation bait and I'm gonna give this to you. I'm actually gonna give you two strategies that we use you guys can go out and use Them tonight. Hopefully you start seeing seeing some good results. We're all about fast fast results so The first technique conversation bait right Now like I want to preface this by saying this is not about cold reading This is not about any sort of like crazy manipulation Conversation bait is nothing more than throwing something out there that is going to force the girl to want to have a conversation Right saying something like oh you have an accent. Don't you whether she does or doesn't okay if a girl has an accent She's gonna say yeah, I'm from South Africa, and if a girl doesn't she's gonna laugh and say why would you ask me that? right That's it Questions being asked then you can continue use more statements Just keep prodding keep drilling down and she's gonna keep asking you guys questions So for instance like a good example of the conversation bait is that question or like saying like you know You have an accent. Don't you because the fact is is like what like what could a girl possibly say to that like what? She's either gonna say yes. No, or why would you ask me that right? Like I mean I can promise you because I've said this thousands of times and that's the only three answers I've ever heard Fact of the matter is is that if she says yes, I do you have something to talk about right? She's gonna start telling you about herself. She's gonna start emotionally investing She says no, I'd know I don't why would you ask me that well there you have some friction right might feel a little bit awkward Well, the fact of the matter is you guys have probably been taught to avoid that awkwardness to avoid moments of her You know maybe putting up resistance to the interaction What what we've actually found is that resistance allows you to overcome it and bring you two together and create very strong sexual emotions when you guys have a fight going between you I actually have like Actually, I think Matt you were there when I was filming an infield video and you know I was having this interaction with this girl, you know We were true like we were trying to like put down like a whole interaction from start to finish in one night and You know, I knew that there wasn't enough emotions at one point like I felt that this was kind of becoming a little bit Boring a little bit stale. So I started a fight with the girl Just started a fight with her. I don't even remember what I said But I just started picking at this fight and just started picking at it and picking at it until she blew up at me Perfect time to use some damage control get it back on track. We have these emotions going again now What did I do? I took her by the hand and you followed us back to my place, right? I mean true story. So but the fact is is that none of this works if you're out there trying to get her Attracted none of this stuff works if you're out there worrying about you know Is this girl not gonna like what I'm saying to her is this girl gonna be offended because I'm saying oh like you have an Accent don't you when she clearly is from the same town as you so That's just one example of like a way to start getting a girl emotionally invested The other technique that I'm gonna give you is called statement roulette. Okay, and what this is is This is basically, you know, I want you guys to each come up with like three or four short statements That aren't too serious. They're fun, right? So things like show me your dance moves something like What Nick what was yours like those are some badass heels those heels are badass Just three statements three to four statements like that that you can just throw out there, right? You don't need to be looking for a reaction. That's the thing so much of this like pickup material is based off of looking For a reaction from the girl when you do this when you throw out statements The only purpose to throw these statements out are to give her something to latch on to okay She might not have she might not give a shit if you want to see her dance moves But she might love that you brought up her shoes, right? She might have just gotten those shoes and she like can't can't believe that you mentioned them And she can't wait to talk to you about them The point is is that if you have three or four statements, right? That are fun and related to you guys having a good time together You just keep throwing them out and eventually something's going to hit now This is the difference and I know that some of you might be thinking like okay So like I'm just supposed to go out there and just start saying things to girls. Yeah, I mean that's exactly it The fact of the matter is is that when we went out and we started just like speaking in statements with looking for No reaction from a girl. This is when girls start saying to you like what why are you being weird? When I hear that I hear game on You know, why are you being weird? Anything anything that this girl is asking you to try to piece you together to try to figure out Why is this guy here saying these things to me? Like why is this guy not doing all the other shit that I've ever seen guys do before me or before this guy Why isn't he trying to buy me drinks? Why isn't he trying to have a conversation with me? You know, the fact of the matter is is whether it's a question about genes or a question about a pizza place or whatever This is all on the pretense that you're trying to establish a conversation Right, those are both questions and the reason that these statements are so effective is because when you go up to a girl, right? I actually had a student the other days like so How would you feel about this if you went up to a girl on that you met on the street and say hey? So like where are we going I was like no that's absolutely garbage because the fact of the matter is is you're going up to her Expecting that this girl is going to see you and like I said before just want to jump on your dick It's like oh here's a guy like you know what? Actually like yeah, I do want to meet you. Here's my number. I'm free on Monday, and I like roses You know, I mean it doesn't happen and the fact of the matter is is that by using statements, right? You are controlling the interaction. You're not asking her for anything. You're not asking her Oh take some responsibility and help me get some sort of interaction going here Instead you're taking full responsibility for the interaction that you two are having Because you have these statements that are fun to yourself These statements that amuse yourself and that show that you're there to have a good time, right and Because you're talking to this girl, and she's already been focused on you. She's already looking you in the eye She's already listening to what you're saying. She's gonna be trying to piece together Why the hell you're saying these things in the first place? She's gonna be trying to figure out what's your name where you're from why you're saying this to her Maybe you guys have met before maybe she's trying to place it doesn't matter But the point is you now have her on the defense you have her on the back foot She doesn't really understand what's going on She doesn't know how to deal with you because she can't fit you in a box of okay This is the kind of guy who's gonna ask to buy me drinks and cling to me all night Or this is the kind of guy that's gonna be super aggressive and try to make out with me at all night You know like girls are very very conscious of this stuff You know I think Nick was saying it like girl like girls know in you know a very short span of time What kind of guy you are? Based off of how you carry yourself How you interact with them and what you say to them, right? If you walk up to a girl and you tap her on the shoulder You hold strong eye contact and then just start spewing nonsense to her that keeps yourself entertained And you talk in statements eventually she's gonna be trying to figure something out Whether it's your name why you're saying these things, you know where you come from it doesn't matter But that is the beginning of emotional investment So then what happens couple questions get asked and boom it's on to the third piece, which is rapport You guys have any questions on this? Well, you know why don't we save it for the end? So okay, so next thing is rapport now. What is rapport? I'm not talking about the rapport that you've read about in other pickup stuff I am talking about very simple get to know you rapport the type of rapport that you have with a new friend The type of rapport that you might have with you know a boss or you know Some girl that you went to school with very casual understanding right So what I mean by this is once you see this girl and she's like, you know She's asking you questions. You feel that the investment is beginning It's time to switch and it's time for you to start asking questions. That's all it means So now it's your turn. It's your chance. Oh, where are you from? What's your name? What do you do? Where'd you go to school all that boring shit that you've always been told is not good or it's it's too Logical or whatever it is for pickup No, that is exactly what you want to be asking Because the fact of the matter is is you're not just coming up with this stuff out of nowhere You're now the guy who's tapped her on the shoulder. You're the guy who's held strong eye contact You've shown that you're not trying to have any sort of weird conversation You're just having a good time with it and now it's time to show her who you really are. It's like, oh, okay Yeah, I'm Zach. Nice to meet you. So what's your name? Where you from? Oh, cool. Nice. That's all it needs to be Very very topical very very casual and then from there as soon as you possibly can as soon as she's comfortable With who you are and what you're about. It's time to get into the fourth piece, which is arousal Now before I start talking about arousal because this is really where you know I think we're gonna have a lot of stuff to talk about and some questions I just want to let you guys know that everything from the focus to the rapport this should all happen in three to five minutes at the most you want to be getting into getting this girl aroused and turned on as As soon as humanly possible to when you first walked up and tapped her on the shoulder You first made eye contact with her now the reason is because I mean let's be real Do you guys see girls with big tits and like fat butts and like great makeup and think? Legs the whole deal and do you like wait about three hours in to think damn this girl's hot No, it doesn't work like that and the girls don't want to wait an hour or two hours Three hours for you to start giving them the sexual experience that you're hoping that this is gonna move towards right now Like I mean it really is nothing better than just a for like a first impression You want to be making a sexual first impression? Otherwise you're making a very different kind of first impression and she's gonna have a very different understanding of who you are and How you and her are gonna be like interacting right? You know what this girl wants is not a bunch of fancy lines She wants an experience and she wants the feeling that being with you is gonna not only be a good choice But it's gonna make her feel safe. It's gonna, you know make her laugh It's gonna make her feel you know hot like you know like like a really attractive Like a really attractive woman she like wants to feel and wants to make you like wants to make you feel She's gonna want to feel like you understand her sexuality and you can take responsibility for it and give her the sexual Experiences that you know she has when she goes to bed at night So like when she had that she thinks about in her mind before she goes to bed at night And when she wakes up in the morning right same way that you guys do you know I mean you guys probably have like fun little like sexual fantasies that run through your head girls are the same way What these girls want and what all women want is for you to be able to give them that experience without really asking much for them so Here we are on to arousal and this is kind of where I think that a lot of the other pickup material is really lacking The fact of the matter is is what happens after you have a girl turned on right does it have like is it like Is it a bunch of lines and gimmicks? No, it's actually very simple It's time to crank up the emotion and time to start letting her know that You know like I said you see her as this woman who has sexual fantasies and sexual desires and You're not only comfortable with that, but you're in touch with that So I'm gonna give you guys I guess I guess I'll just I'll give you one Little strategy to do this because this is just so money This you guys can take this out and you know Hopefully you guys use this tonight. You can come back tomorrow and I want to hear some awesome stories about this All right, this is a strategy that we realized that we were doing after we watched like a bunch of videos of ourselves and we call this explicit restraint and What explicit restraint is is basically you're gonna say Like what it is that you want to do to this girl, right? Whether it's like something really really graphic like you know throwing her up against the wall and ripping her clothes off Or even if it's something, you know kind of innocent like, you know trying to make out with her trying to kiss her, right? You're gonna say something that you want to do to this girl But then you're gonna give her a reason why you're not gonna do it right then Okay, so for instance, this is Here's one that we used on program a couple weeks ago We had a student and we were at the bar and there was this girl She was stunning and she was there with her mom and her dad and her brothers and it was just it was it was just such a Loaded situation, you know and the fact was this girl was just too hot not to approach Do you guys know those girls the ones that like they walk in you're like oh This girl is just too hot not to approach it doesn't matter that her mom's there her dad's there or whatever So I told the student I was like look dude like I know what I would do if I were you I'd I'd approach her So he was like yeah, but like what do I say? I was like, you know what like you only have one shot at this You might as well just go just swing for the fences. So I told him I was like go up to this girl Tell this girl if her parents weren't watching her like a hawk You'd be trying to make out with her shamelessly right now And what happened he walked up to her he like kind of pulled her aside whispered that in her ear and You know me and Rob were like hanging in the background like waiting to see like all May is this gonna blow up or is this gonna go great and All of a sudden the girl like I saw like the wheels turning and all of a sudden this huge grin spread over this girl So they're like this girl's face huge grin Started laughing feel like you know and the fact of the matter was her parents were watching her like a hawk and her Parents saw what was going on they grabbed her and whisked her away, and they all left the bar Fact of the matter is how good is that? You know like when you are getting a girl turned on to the point where her parents have to remove her from the situation and That's what I'm saying is like you want to be and like I want to give you like a little I would just to like give you a peek into why this works So well the reason that this idea of explicit restraint works so well is not because you're being vulgar or because you know You're stating your sexual intentions. It's because you're planting the idea in her head and making her feel comfortable with the fact That you're not about to just jump on it, right? So many guys that study this dating advice and pick up stuff You know so many guys are so caught up in the idea of needing this girl and needing to get the sex that You know, it's just so obvious, you know, and I can say that because I was one of those guys You know, I felt like you know, oh like you can't get a phone number because that's that's no good You got to like get her home with you. Otherwise, it doesn't count, right? And if you guys ever I like ever thought anything like that or something like oh like I got to get the phone number I got a close or anything like that, right? It's all Focused on needing that outcome too bad to the point where you're not able to give this girl the experience that she wants Because you're too focused on something else something that really doesn't matter This outcome doesn't matter what matters is giving these girls this experience and bringing them to getting aroused and Putting these ideas in their head that if you get a second alone with them You're gonna be ripping their clothes off and throwing them up against the wall And the fact of the matter is is that because you're telling her I'm not like you're basically giving her reason Why you're not gonna do it right now if that girl hangs around you any longer, she knows what's going down and to be honest If you don't follow through on it, you're just being rude Because that's what she wants you've told her what you're gonna give her and she's made the conscious decision to still hang around you So that is not the time to back step and start talking and have conversations No, that's the con that's the time to take her by the hand walk her into a corner and make out with her You know and then from there make sure you have the phone number if you want to take her home Try like tell her tell her about the awesome margaritas that you're gonna make at your place Tell her about the really sweet balcony you have at your place tell her about you know You know some video that you saw on YouTube that you have to show her and You know get her home But the fact of the matter is it's like this is a very very succinct way to go out and get consistent results Now the fact of the matter is is this you know flashy? No Not at all, but I mean how many guys came here to learn how to be flashy Okay, how many guys came here to learn how to take girls home and bang them and that's the fact like you know Like I like I hate to be vulgar, but it's true though Like this is like you want to know a very simple way to go out and get consistent results get a girl focused on you Speak in statements and get her emotionally investing in you Build some very general topical rapport and then start getting her around start planning the idea that you and her are Somehow playing out one of her sexual fantasies and let that live in her head You don't need to do any work you plant that idea in her head. That's when she starts doing the work That's when you guys get what you really want, which is oh like this guy's hot I want to hook up with him instead of feeling like you have some girl that you're just kind Like trying to steamroll back into bed with you or some girl that you're taking by the hand And you just have to drag her or have like the right line to say next What if the right line really didn't matter because the fact of the matter was this girl's already decided she wants to hook up with you That's the game that I'm trying to play That's the game that wins every time because the fact of the matter is you just don't have to work that hard so I guess that's pretty much everything that I had for you guys that I wanted to say and And You know if you guys have questions, I'm happy to answer them Otherwise, you know take that stuff and give it a shot. Let me know how it goes tomorrow. I'll be here all weekend I just have one question kind of silly but like the one step you were talking about where you where you walk up to a girl And you you make that eye contact you you stare at her you you don't say anything It's you know, isn't there a possibility that that could like creep the girl out and she's figure a psycho or something Okay, well, I mean the fact of the matter is that Sure Sure it could but the fact is is that are you a psycho? Are you gonna kill her? Well, and that's the fact is like if like if you have those intentions in your head then yeah You're gonna be creepy, but if what you have in your head is oh man like the second this girl gives me a chance I'm gonna start turning her on How's that? That's not creepy. That's what she showed up to the bar for That's why she's wearing a mini skirt and high heels and put on all that makeup and took an hour and a half to get ready That's why she changed her shirt five times and she went out wearing a thong because she's looking to get creeped on You know But what she wants is a guy who's gonna do it in a way that gives her the experience that she wants Right gives her the experience that she got dressed up and went out looking for the guy that can make her feel like Yeah, like a little bit awkward and shaken up and on the defense But also knows that you know, she's a sexual being that she's out because she's looking to hook up and have fun You know, and that's the difference The difference is is are you gonna when she tap when you tap her and you hold eye contact? Are you gonna just keep tap? Are you just gonna keep staring? Or are you gonna then start throwing out those statements that are fun and self entertaining like oh show me your dance moves or You know Like let's get a drink, you know any of those things are perfect things to say You tap a girl and say let's get a drink. She but what's her? What's she gonna say? Who are you? Perfect, that's emotionally investing in you. What's your name? She's asking you what your name is simply because you let off with a strong statement Does that make sense? So yeah, if you just do that yes, that is creepy, but that's why you got to keep it moving forward from there Just for clarification. This is mostly for like bar game and things like that, right? Or do you see this being applied in more like daytime? Well, I mean this stuff definitely applies in the daytime like a hundred percent the only thing is is that you know, I'm from New York and Rob and I have a pretty deep history running day game and we found that the things that work in day game tend to be a bit different Yeah, you have to have her focused. Yeah, you need to you know get her Emotional and build some brief rapport and get her aroused But the thing is is that the day gives such a different context to it that like while You're still doing all those things. It doesn't look like you know, we've been discussing here. Like yeah, it's a good question What we've been talking about Bar party environment like you're not gonna walk up to a girl and tap her on the street like I like Like I know for a fact that that's not the best way to do it. I found out. Yeah, thank you So yeah, no the this stuff like we have a very different approach to day game But it definitely encompasses all of these things, but yeah, that's a good point What what we're talking about here is strictly for parties Bars, you know, if you have let's say you get a girl and you you're texting back and forth with her You can definitely use this stuff via text It's not something that you want to use in a day game situation Which is way way way more casual. It has to be way more understated You can't be as explicit with girls because the fact is is that Just comes off a bit creepy getting too sexual in the day is just too creepy You just want to get the number get out set up a date and then pick up with being creepy Any other questions? All right So in that case, I hope that you guys go out and give some of this stuff a try like I understand Maybe this is not something that you guys have done before Maybe it's you've tried some of these things before and you know, you haven't gotten consistent results I want you to take some time if you guys aren't doing coaching tonight or whatever Take some time to read over what I gave you and go out and try to execute that plan get a girl focused on you Once you see that she's focused start throwing out some conversation bait or some, you know, a couple statements Once you have her asking you questions about yourself switch gears ask her a few questions Tell her a little bit about yourself and then as soon as you can Try throwing out the explicit restraint move to the arousal strategies see what happens So I hope that that gives you guys a bit of an understanding about what it is that Rob and I do and you know how we found Pretty consistent way to be able to you almost put on autopilot when the girl's standing there in front of you So thanks for having me and have fun