 Let me see here, I really love to have something that you can share this, y'all give me a second I'm trying to get this here, new to the other, y'all forgive me, I'm trying to figure out I'm streaming from the laptop, it's a little different on the laptop than when you're on the cell phone, I'm in Detroit right now in a bed and breakfast, so that's why y'all see the microwave and refrigerator back there and so I was coming up here we were gonna be doing like a men's chat, men's talk but then change of plans and you know me got a mentee up here and a gentleman that like mentee hit he and his wife been supporting me you know consuming the content for about a decade now and so in the couple's course they in the couple's course and we had an extra room so I was like hey if one of y'all couples want to get away got an extra room at the bed and breakfast y'all could come use this little getaway or one of the husbands want to get away to come and you know be a part of the little shoot that we doing and so one of the gentlemen was able to make it and he actually from the area so that's been kind of cool just being able to go around and see Detroit and kind of cool so want to pop on here because we just up you know kind of chill and relaxing at the bed and breakfast what they'll do is they you know they bring you breakfast to your room so that was kind of cool and so I'm gonna be coming up here probably the right books and stuff but um we just you know up chilling we're gonna be shooting later so I said let me make use of this time because I've been watching Kanye West documentary which is inspiring I've been watching that on our Netflix but I said let me make use of some of this time and you know hop on this hill line and get my video in and I want to do something for the blessed business tribe too because Saturdays is when I post for the blessed business tribe so I probably be doing that as well and try to get something up and you know be able to post that and then to the patreon now on patreon you have on the first it's the first when you get charged for patreon so you know be mindful of that that don't sign up if you want to support over there wait to the first if you haven't joined already because it'll charge you that day and then a charge you again on the first and then going forward what I be doing with the blessed business tribe is I'm gonna leave it up in case you just want to stay on YouTube with the blessed business tribe but I'm also gonna be posting those videos for the $10 and up patrons on patreon so if you're not in the blessed business tribe but you want to get those business videos then you could just join the patreon and I'll be posting the same videos over there they're going forward all the past ones they might be too much to try to re-upload them or what have you or I would have to make them all unlisted or something like that so it might be a little hard to do that but um if y'all got any questions for me on here what they call these ask me anything put on hashtag over there Kanye West they actually got episode 2 up now episode 3 is a March 2nd but it's just kind of interesting to see what he's doing Lorenza okay Lorenza I seen you in the in the chat the other day hi I met a guy before his month-long trip to Nigeria he said that he was interested to get to know me should I be expecting to hear from him while there or once he returns you should hear from Wally there if he have WhatsApp or if you have a way to contact you if he's really interested but if not then it'll be when it gets back and if somebody's staying a whole month though either they doing big business or they got a family over there so that's the other thing to kind of keep in mind as well might be with somebody with a family and I'm trying to think what what's going on right now in the relationship space out in the world I haven't been up on any other you know the blogs or anything I haven't seen anything because what's going on in the other parts of the world you crane and prayers out for that right there it's kind of hard it's kind of weird being on the other side of the world and seeing stuff going on and you still got to live your life you still got to run your business you still got to do all of this and it's always that feeling of like when you going through you want everything around you to shut down you want when you grieving the loss of a loved one and you looking at other people like hey how you smiling today and I just lost somebody I love but it's always that lesson about with life how life goes on like people still live and people still doing what they got to do in the midst of all the chaos going on that's a life lesson that I that I always give myself like don't nobody care about you and your problems they gonna keep doing what they got to do so that's more the reason to take care of you and to make sure you prioritize and you cuz some happen to you it ain't gonna be a national holiday but yet we'll put ourselves on hold and give ourselves up for everybody for the job and for everything else and and don't think about us and then boom tips to keep my six-year-old son on a healthy godly path single mom his dad is still in the world I tell you what one of the biggest things with parenting the biggest mistake I see parents make is just not being consistent not being consistent and thinking that we're being too hard and so I just ordered some shirts yesterday for myself personally and say consistency and I'm gonna be wearing that you that might be the only shirt I wear on my videos going forward once I get them because I think I ordered 12 oh so I got enough to get through a whole almost two weeks and just to remind myself I think in everything in life is consistency so I give you an example last night I talked to my son I sent him this video that went viral you know and it was about this young lady this young white lady she young white girl she in high school look like probably like my son age and she took in she um Christine God bless you she did this video or she saying the n-word saying the n-word y'all little dark ends you know you probably be this and that if you just weren't so dark ends we don't like ends and she's saying it with the R with the R on there and I sent that to my son because he goes to a pretty much all white school and I'm saying to him this is what kids do with social media because he's been asking me to get on Snapchat my son 14 years old my son will be 15 in March and he don't have a Snapchat and he could sneak and get one but I talked to him about it and I tell him about it and my wife she say she was doing some research and she said the number one social media that they say is the worst for kids to have is Snapchat because the pictures disappear they can set it up on a disappearing thing and so all my son friends got Snapchat and he was like it's another way to communicate and I just don't like my son energy right now just he getting older this rap music go to make him think they cool so I'm texting with my son he 14 I'm in Detroit he home they coming back from from NBA game that is my tickets is for courtside tickets so here my 14 year old my 7 year old my wife and her dad coming back from a courtside NBA game and I'm texting with my son and he didn't he a straight-A student now and this is what people don't understand my son straight-A student and at a hard school and he take AP class he got an AP class which is advanced placement class his other classes are honors classes so he in all honors classes so his GPA right now is like a 4.6 whereas you know for a lot of people if you get a 4.0 you are genius three I'll have with a 3.0 I will have with a 2.0 but athletes we have with a 2.0 my son about a 4.6 GPA right now because he take all honors classes and AP class and so he got straight A's got two A minuses AP class I think a geometry class what we text him last night I said son stop texting with lower case letters like make your first word uppercase and use proper grammar and he was like and he was like well dad I use proper grammar on my papers my essays and stuff I say what you need to use proper grammar in your text message to he's like that's very time-consuming I say anything worth having is time-consuming and I say you need to practice excellence in the small things so to be easier in the large things and he was like that's kind of he's like are you being serious with me right now I'm like yes I'm being serious I say you see I'm talking with proper grammar proper punctuation you know it's proper spelling I say practice excellence in the small things and he was like okay I'll try my best but he's still texting me and he's like okay good night I'm gonna go to sleep now I didn't dismiss him I didn't say okay you could go to sleep I didn't say hey this conversation over so he dismisses me so I call I call him on the phone I say hey did not just tell you to text with proper grammar and punctuation yes sir I say so what you still texting me with lowercase letters and and no punctuation for oh I gotta change it in my settings I changed in my settings like that for the first word to be lowercase I say so why you change your settings to be done I say why would you change your settings to be incorrect I say change your settings to excellence mean and I'm telling him in life change your lifestyle to excellence and be excellent in everything you do don't don't be mediocre over here and then just think you could turn on excellence when you want to turn on excellence and so I talked to him and I got a phone with him and then I call his mama she driving and I said hey tell your son he off that Xbox all day Saturday all day Sunday cuz I don't like his attitude I don't like the way he talking to me and then I said son how you gonna look when I was talking I say how you gonna look when a scout text you in the 11th grade and you texting with lowercase first word and no punctuation he said oh well I text him I would text him the proper way I say so how you gonna text y'all forgive my language I say how you gonna text white man the proper way and you gonna text me with slang and lowercase and I'm the one who gave you your whole life and everything you got I say boy you better talk to me with excellence and respect before you talk to anybody else with excellence and respect oh yes sir yes and see he think I'd be being too serious but it's this thing and this what I see with a lot of parents when I look at this I got a home while he called me yesterday and Andre Berto world champion boxer he this man his dad had him doing 500 push-ups 500 squats before school that man walk around school he said he walked around school limping it's so sore and then he running five miles daddy driving behind him in the car he doing the deck of cars doing push-ups with the deck of cars he training as a boxer from six years old seven eight years old that's thing you know go to the Olympics for his country Haiti live in America but his Haitian descent go to the Olympics for Haiti winning national championships signed as a pro boxer around 18 20 somewhere around there make millions of dollars millions of dollars fought against Floyd may well and looking at how he was raised all of us could have said man your daddy crazy but did you know Virto never did drugs never been arrested never got in trouble made millions of dollars and turn out just fine but it seemed like his daddy was overbearing and way too hard on and then ex NFL player who played eight years in the NFL text me this video of a man and it's online went viral and the man said man said it's gonna turn into a parenting session right now the man said my grandfather walked 10 miles to school my father walked five miles he said my father drive drove up forward I drive a Cadillac my son gonna drive a Lamborghini and his son gonna drive a Ferrari and oh this way his granddad told him and he said tough times make tough men but tough men make easy times and easy times make weak men and weak men make tough times raise warriors and that thing hit me so hard because I drive a Bentley my wife drive a G wagon I got a sprinter and I got a challenger a superstar all of my cars cost over a hundred thousand dollars so my son who was 14 get out of a $300,000 car and get into a $200,000 car and then get into another $200,000 car then get into another $100,000 150,000 car and then I bought his granddad a hundred and sixty thousand dollar car so even I bought his grandma both of his grandmoms of Mercedes Benz it's about his granddad or Maserati so whatever my son go he have no struggle because of what his dad created so his dad is creating easy times but when you create easy times that can create weak children and when your children are weak then your children gonna create hard times because your children gonna have you bailing them out of jail your children gonna have you paying they bills your children gonna have you taking care of them today 40 50 years old because you created easy times so even though we create easy times we still have to demand excellence and so my son 14 get ready to be 15 the thing he love the most is that game but he think what win time on that game cuz he get to play his games on Friday night Saturday and Sunday he think what win time on that game is his grades but now that's what your mama want them grades I know you ain't got to have straight A's to make a million dollars the grades important I won't respect you got to talk to me like you got some sense so my son huffing puff he playing a soccer game right now when he finish his soccer game he got to go straight to his school cuz they got a grant from MIT for a technology project they built he going to the school and he have to do a tour with the people from MIT showing them the facilities and everything they using and they chose him as the spokesperson because he's so well spoken my son so well spoken because his daddy not that well spoken but my son so well spoken because when he was little when my son was five years old six years old I used to get on in him I taught him how to shake hands look somebody in the eye say hello I'm doing great how are you and every single time he did it wrong as soon as we walk away from that person I say son pick your head up look somebody in the eye and you say hello and you say how are you and you say I'm doing great you or you say I'm doing great how are you and he was so little that he couldn't understand that but now when my son meet somebody we went to the magic game we met one of the players mom as soon as my son shook her hand she said whoa strong handshake I love that my son 14 I taught him that at three four five years old when my son was little his mama don't his mama don't say yes sir and no sir yes ma'am and no ma'am today parents because they Jamaican so they don't say yes sir no sir they that's that's from America and that's from they think it's from slavery but it's also from the military sir yes sir and so my dad went to the military so my dad raised me yes sir no sir I heard my wife talking to her parents yeah no I'm like because I still say yes sir no sir to my daddy now and to my mama yes ma'am no ma'am now so when my son soon as they could talk yes sir no sir yes ma'am no ma'am so when they go out and they meet people guess what everybody come and say to us your kids is so well manner your kids so well manner and and guess what that do that put them at the front of the line that put them in the head of the class it wins favor because adults want to be respected but adults feel like we can't teach our kids no respect and that's why our society is in the shambles that it's in because parents so caught up on Netflix and in fornication or adultery and reality TV and our own lives that we not raising our kids so now we in a generation of adults who were not raised they just grew and it's gonna get worse and worse and worse unless we take and we do something about it and we change the way we raise our kids because listen so I talked to my son he's like dad is it really that serious on text message I say son everything serious I say everything serious because I said I'm in Detroit I just walked out of a restaurant last night we went to the sloppy chop last night and I had some lamb chops I walk we walk out the thing at the restaurant the two guys on with they was ahead of me because I think I went to the restaurant I did something no I wouldn't get my two pit and so they was ahead of me so when I come out I look right here to the street I'm on the sidewalk on the side of sloppy chop I look into the street it's a police car they in a day in the Ford Explorer and they got they wonder down and both of them breaking a neck looking at me now I'm walking fast because I got on the little windbreaker and it's snowing in Detroit and it's cold so I'm walking fast I got a bop on me I'm bopping about like a crackhead and so they looking at me and then I look over and I see them looking at me and then the guy pulled out the flashlight and cut the flashlight on by the time I was caught up with my two guys and one of the guys he's six six and so they shine the flashlight in our face and I'm like what in the world this man shot we got on we dressed nice like I got on turquoise it just came out the restaurant why you got the flashlight in my face now I didn't realize it I didn't process it fast enough but me being a successful black man when you get some success you start to feel yourself because now you feel like you to made it so you get more confidence than you had when you was a poor black person in America and so me I'd be checking people left and right so had it been another three four seconds I would have said to the police what you got that light in my face for and then what you think would have happened it would have been a downward spiral from now so I told my son I say son I just police just shining flashlight in my face for walking out the restaurant probably was looking for somebody I said what you think could have happened my son I don't know got straight A's now I don't know your kid could have book smarts but not have street smarts I said son use your head and you tell me if the police shine the flashlight in my eyes and I said to him why you got that flashlight in my eyes what you think gonna happen and then he said I don't know maybe he would have tased you maybe he would have got out in you know got in got on you or something I say exactly and I said so what you think would have happened from now if I would have reacted I said I could have died tonight just like that a turn of events could happen and that's what happened every single day in America just every single day around the world just like that a turn of events could happen and had we not been emotionally intelligent we could either went to jail last night or even lost our life because when all of these things happen that's all it is it's just an escalation of events it just a police said something to the person person ain't like what he said person gave a little bit of resistance so said something the wrong way police ain't like it police mad had a bad day he frustrated he angry he take it out on that person not somebody dead and not it's riots in the streets and it's all of this right here just off a series of events so I was telling my son take everything serious take everything serious and I'm glad that topic came up and that that's so that gave me a theme of the chat because I feel like even more so in relationships and that's one of the biggest things is that even more so in relationships mothers and fathers need to be focused on their children if you got children we put so much emphasis on relationships that we forget about when we brought children into the world it no longer is about our happiness and that's what I try to get single parents to to understand if you had kids it's no longer about your happiness now it's about your intentionality now it's about your purpose now it's about your production with your children and my sister single mom and she I just got a little I just got a little and if I live I be done kept myself I say listen you didn't think about that when you got on your back so if we lay down to have kids then we need to stand up and raise them and take what take what come with it take what come with it and so guess what on our own Valentine's on anniversary on birthday our sons have soccer so we had a soccer field we had a soccer field on every holiday Easter everything except for Christmas or stuff like that and in a tournament right before Christmas or right after it so you can't even go nowhere it's right after Thanksgiving so you can't even go nowhere so because we had kids we got to make sure that they life is full we got to make sure that they taking care of got to make sure that they being developed and so that means we got to sacrifice our holidays our birthdays and the number one thing I see for next God bless you the number one thing I see with parents is a lack of consistency with our children and that's one thing that I'm gonna be and you know what we don't really remember pain like think about how we don't really remember pain and when I say this is like it's some things that have happened to people when they were three years old four years old and they remember it but it's it doesn't have them they're not crippled because of it like it's some real pain that have happened to people and they're not crippled because of it and so one thing I know if you love in your child and you strict on your child and you consistently strict on your child you love them you praise them you support them but you also are hard on them meaning you harder than the world gonna be and you preparing them you can't protect them so you gotta prepare so if you protect your child Britain welcome to the blessed trial if you protect in your child if you preparing your child when your child get grown what do we say about our parents who was strict on us do we hate our parents we say man my mom was strict but my daddy was strict but hey it paid off it paid off they kept me out of jail it kept me out the streets it kept me Renee God bless you welcome to the bless try it kept me and we look back and we like you know what ain't he mad about that ain't he mad about that because I know I know what they were trying to do now it's different now it's people who were physically a few like like really done wrong and they overcame that and they turned that into purpose and they raised in their children differently and better with more love or some carrying the generational thing on but they hear them from that so we have to ask ourselves do we really think our children are gonna be traumatized because we took them off the game we took them off the tablet we took them off of that because their attitude their energy their behavior their grades their work ethic wasn't up to par and we setting a good standard now if you said in a horrible standard you said in a horrible example you can't really expect them for you from your kids but if you said in a good example and you being a role model then you can expect excellence from your children and that's what we got to get to and I'm gonna tell you it got to be done and we have to have consistency we got to have engagement we got to get over ourselves and our problems and what we going through and what we feeling and we got to be consistently engaged with our children and so my son he probably a couple of weeks ago was grounded from the game because he didn't live up to his mama's standards and what she asked of him and now this weekend he grounded because he ain't living up to mine and we asking for two different things but what that's gonna make him is a well-rounded young man and I tell him like this I said son when you get out my house you could do what you want to do but when you get out of my house you're gonna be trained for the world you're gonna be ready for the world so if you make a stupid decision guess what you're gonna do you're gonna live with it I said I can't run to you I won't spend a dime of my hard-earned money to bail you out no jail or to get you out of trouble if you them been prepared for that decision and you chose to make a bad decision you gonna live with the consequences and so that's why I tell him so if I'm gonna take that stance that mean I got to be hard on him and I got to teach him everything he need to know so that he is equipped to make the right decisions in his life and that's one thing and especially I'm gonna tell y'all women I'm gonna tell the women see men we naturally hard by nature now it's some men that don't know how to raise kids but for the most part because men require respect because we demand respect men naturally gonna raise children better in the sense of being prepared and I hate to offend y'all ladies but what happened is a lot of times what women do is you let the kids get to get away with too much especially if you're a single mom because you saying I don't want him to hate me I don't want him to be against me I want my son to be happy you know I don't want my son to go choose his dad or I don't want my son to be like his dad and so you let him have his his way and you make your son you make your son your husband you make your son your king no that's your son treat your son like a son hold your son accountable check your son get with your son you got to physically put hands on them if that ain't what you want to do but take that tablet take that Xbox take them shoes out that closet give them one pair of shoes wet old shoes like let him know who pay the bills let him know who run this and let him know respect all the way to the tee is required because we get disrespected in our own house and then and then go to the service and want to be yes sir yes sir we let our kids disrespect us then they go to go to a stranger sir yes sir no no you're not finna tell no stranger sir yes sir and and give me your butt the kids absolutely not you finna sir yes sir me and if you got a question for an adult that's gonna come for the adults you meet in the world but in my house if my it's my rules and so because I take care this here and if you ready to take care this here they ain't gonna hit go about your business and so and guess what a child gonna do child gonna respect that they're gonna respect that because they know it's coming from love it ain't it ain't abuse it ain't it ain't out of the way it's consistent it's real it's strategic and that's what you you raising greatness and see a lot of times people don't realize when you raise greatness like my dad he required excellence yes sir no sir yes ma'am no ma'am he did not let me get out the way now my daughter he my sister he didn't do that his daughter he didn't do that because what we let the girls do sometime we let the girls be little misprincess do they thing so my sister had a soft spot for my daddy but my daddy being a man he knew what the world's gonna require me guess what his son did his son bought him a hundred and sixty thousand dollar Maserati he raised greatness so it put me in a position to be great and what it did for him it paid him back so now his son in a position to bless him with three thousand dollars a month to bless his mama my mama get three thousand dollars a month because they raise greatness and so a lot of time parents don't realize it's like and you don't raise to benefit you but when you raise your child with dignity and respect and you don't let them get away with nothing and you own them when they get to where they got to go they gonna be able to bless they whole family and be a blessing to the world because of how they raise so because of how I was raised look what I'm doing with my life now when you look over into the darkness with people with stuff spending on a desk you see how they was raised so what they doing with a platform what they doing with millions of people listening bashing and beating up on women verbally and so what we have to realize as parents is you might not feel great you might not feel great as a parent meaning you might not be in the best shape that you want to be in you might not have all the money you want to have you might not have all the job and career you want to have but what you get the opportunity to do is impact your child's life with excellence to teach your child excellence and then your child could grow up and reach millions your child could grow up and earn millions your child could grow up and be one of the people that changed the world because you took and you made your child your purpose and your investment and a lot of time we don't realize that so my son I'm raising greatness it and listen and and that way if they don't become great and great meaning a productive citizen if they don't become great that's on them I'm gonna sleep well at night because I'm gonna say I did everything in my power I gave them every tool I gave me a resource I gave never to I gave every honor wisdom I held them accountable they made a choice cuz cuz adults can make choices my parents raised greatness but I still was a drug dealer but because of the foundation I knew how to get back on the right path I knew how to get my life right I still made stupid choices but I knew how to get right so listen that's how much I want y'all to understand that and that was a man that I was talking to my son like 11 p.m. last night on text and he got grounded this weekend that that that with God had a young lady asked that question outside of a relationship question cuz cuz I feel like that's what we need that's that's what we need we we gotta have you know better with kids any advice on pinning down a niche with coaching I've surrendered to the fact that people have always looked to me for advice and insight even being young just having issues with choosing a lane I would say that when it comes to choosing your lane it's hard because as creatures you know as humans we we multifaceted and so you really you find the thing that you know the most about and it comes to you the easiest so for me because I had the most experience in relationships I have more experience in relationships than I had in business so I chose relationships to teach on that so you have to look at so if you got more experience with organization than relationships then you're organizing coach you helping people get their stuff in order organize they home organize they closet organize their schedule and so you have to look at where you have the most experience if you have most experience as a single parent then being in a healthy relationship then you're a single parents coach you have more experience in entrepreneurship than in relationships then you're entrepreneur coach or business coach and so you just have to look at where your greatest strength is and you got to be real with yourself and and realize that we're not equally balanced on anything Tony was your favorite movie song or scripture I really don't have favorites of anything you know I'm not that type of person I'm kind of just you know I can't even think of a song to be honest with you and I don't watch movies twice and saying which scripture I hold them all equal and I think it's just a personality thing I know a lot of people is big on favorites but I just I've never been that type of person I'm not like a super attached type or I don't like routine and mundane you know things I'll be spontaneous Tony what advice do you have for singles that want to have children singles that want to have children you first got to have yourself Angela so before you could have children you got to have yourself so and when you have yourself meaning when you get where you need to be you got to look down at you got to go down the list you gotta say am I have I hit my weight goal have I hit my career goal have I hit my balance goal have I hit my priorities goal whatever goals you have and where you answering no that could be the area that's holding you back from your relationship that will produce your children and so you really have to first have the discipline and the sacrifice to have you before you can have kids and if you want kids now you can have kids with anybody but it's it's it if you just want children it's in a manner get your pregnant now what do you want a relationship or help healthy relationship with that you know so you got to think on that with the guy Nigeria how should I take it if he waits until he returns we talked for a while and he mentioned that he was visiting however he didn't say family um if he wait until he returned he don't he don't want you you don't mean you don't mean nothing and he probably is over there with a family he if he if you don't hear from while he over there then he over there with a family because Nigerian people in Nigeria have Skype I mean zoom FaceTime all that what's out they could he could reach it if he want to reach it my ex my ex came with his family from Kenya I'm so hurt because he didn't prepare us and we were in a good place how do I navigate this new norm I thought I was strong now I'm questioning my strength well you got to prepare yourself and you said your ex so if that's your ex then that he shouldn't be getting too much of your your brain pattern your brain matter power you need to be moving on with your life you need to be moving on with your life and sometimes I'm gonna tell you something about life it a lot of time people say Tony how do I get over this how do I heal this how do I do this you just got to do it you just got to do it like and no guideline is no battery for your back it's no it's you just got to put one foot in front of the other you just got to go get a job you just got to save your money you just got to go to the shelter go to the room and house go get into the weekly the room that you pay weekly you just have to do it and when you do it that's where the strength come from it just like when you working out it's like the wait's not gonna come to you the work I ain't gonna make you do it you got to do it but when you do it you get stronger and so the thing is to do so when my son said to me last night on the text I hit him with the Yoda quote and I ain't never seen the movie I just seen the quote and it say there is no try do or do not that what Yoda said I hit my son with that when he saw mama try my best they ain't no try do it or don't do it and that's what we have to get to and that and I think honestly you're gonna realize that doing and not doing is the difference between success and failure you just got to do it and when you do it you reap the benefit but a lot of time we'll sit and we'd be twiddling our thumbs twiddling our thumbs so oh you know what how can I earn more money how can I earn more money like I sit there and I won't sell I won't sell I got all these courses courses that can impact people live change people lives and I got all these people online and I won't sell you go to my Instagram I never post my academy and I won't sell and I be sitting there and be like man you know how can I raise my income and the answer is Tony send an email to your email list to your mailing list and then anytime I do that anytime I send an email to my mailing list of the students it is typically it'll earn like somebody'll take part in what I have created but if I'm just sitting on sitting there not sharing it with anybody not telling anybody about it nothing happens but when I do it I see the results and not everybody gonna like your doing when you start to do some people not gonna like you doing because mediocrity despises excellence someone who stagnant will despise you if you're making progress so you have to understand that as you gain you're gonna lose so as new people come some people gonna be leaving too as you helping somebody when you helping somebody you offended somebody else it's always too size to it so we have to realize that baby daddy only gets some want so we can give me 300 a month so I file child support so I really not see that I think that's a personal choice that's a personal choice you know I can't say what I would do in that situation one thing I do know me and hate child support I know me and hate child support me I don't fully understand it I've never been on child support and I've never had to put anybody on child support so I don't know the latest rules and laws of it I honestly from a male perspective I like it and I don't like it it's like sometimes I like it if the guys are bomb but he just running off on the plug then I like when he on child support because his license gets suspended and he can't do nothing with his life and that's how I feel a man deserve that if he gonna be a dead beat dad he not gonna help his kids but then at the same time you could do child support and the people he could say he don't have a job and they put the man on five dollars a month one of my sister's sons my sister son his daddy on five dollars no her daughter her daddy on five dollars a month and he go down to the courthouse or whatever and put fifty cent on the books but his child support literally five dollars a month because he ain't got no job and so it's like it just depends on the situation all right now hold on now question coming in too fast now what email should I contact regards my toner gas Academy account I'm gonna tell you now haven't been able to log in what you ought to try to do is for one make sure you don't have two emails so if you got a second email try to log in with that other email if your email has a really hard spelling which I could tell your name is very hard then that hard spelling you most likely got a typo in your email address when you signed up and so so double check for yourself right there how you on if you could get in let me see this because I feel like I saw your email come in you email in the right place though you know I changed all the prices on the Academy yep so based on your name I search your name in the Academy system and you put hmail instead of gmail so again I'm gonna change this for you right now so again when y'all goes to Tony gas Academy dot-com when you sign up triple check triple check your email cuz that's everybody do that and that's and I'll be honest with y'all because because of this right here be happening so you put hmail instead of gmail so you can sign in now with gmail and then sometimes people be writing in acting like people some people be writing in like I'm running a scam oh I bought a course and I can't get to my course I pay for this course and I and I mean be going off in email and then I go into the Academy because I'm the only one with access to the Academy I gotta go in the Academy and right now we got like 200 email so sometime when y'all right I gotta do the work personally cuz I'm the only one with access to the Academy that's a business lesson for y'all I don't let nobody touch my money can't nobody touch my can't nobody log into my Academy can't nobody log into my bank account how people who got seven figures everybody having accountant and all that on my accountant I tell accountant what the numbers are don't tell me what the numbers are cuz I don't know you you talk about my business at the salon no I tell you what the numbers is and so on the Academy only I have to go in there so when it's 200 emails in there but the thing about it with everybody who having trouble is you put dot-con instead of dot-com or you put h-mail or y-mail instead of g-mail or you left a letter off on your name and so try try to log in with a typo and then you gonna get in and then when you get in then you could change your email to the right thing that's how to you know problem-solve troubleshoot on your own when it's taken because sometimes might take me a week or two to get back to support I still run my business like that cuz I don't trust people and I know every business get stolen from at some point but me I'm not the type of person to get stolen from so that's why I don't that's why I don't get nobody that opportunity because I don't want nobody to lose their life and I don't want my family to lose me so if I let somebody work for me and they steal from me they gonna be with the Lord and so I know I'm not mature enough yet to let somebody steal from me and and they still be here with us on earth so that's why I'm putting nobody in that position to set they self up for failure and to set myself up for failure and then I got to be in crib so that's the God honest truth I'll be honest with you cuz I can easily let somebody do it but I just don't want nobody to set they self up for failure cuz I know humans just gonna steal at some point just gonna steal just ain't gonna be that honest it it might take 20 years but they're gonna steal and even then if the Lord ain't dealt with me yet now I got to go to prayer I just I rather do it myself so we could keep this good work going what the Lord got going you got to know your strengths and weaknesses no question I just want to say that in the two years I've been following you your work has been shaping me as a woman in every aspect God bless you for real hey God bless you bless your tips on healing and breaking a soul tie you in the right place and you're doing the right thing you're doing the right thing keep putting one foot in it on it don't change Vanessa told you type in soul ties by Tony Gaston and almost any question you gonna have I got a video on it so if you knew here I got a video on it how do I address my daughter's father's ex-girlfriend impersonating me by emailing OAG requesting paternity results and OAG sent me a letter to request sent me a letter the request was made I haven't told him yet but I am upset just address it just send an email I mean just send them a text message you know just address it it's not something that is you know that big it's not like one thing about men is no good time and there's no bad time to tell us what you got to tell us it's gonna get treated the same way whether it's right after a funeral we just left or whether it's right before our birthday it's like as men you you dealing with the realities of life every single day so it's not something that you have to make into this big grand thing and call a big meeting you could just send them a text and say hey I was I received a letter from OAG that said there was a request made on my behalf for paternity results and I did not send that request do you have any idea who could have done this just like that just like that our question about OAG knew it wasn't me because of course as mother I know there isn't any paternity results on file because he didn't want one my daughter is his first only she heard got a good point Trenesia welcome to the blessed tribe D. Tanner welcome to the blessed tribe and it D. God bless you now God bless you that was the plug computer in a long out of bed on him I'm gonna get off here at an hour I just want to pop in and get my video in the books and sometimes when you're in somewhere else the Wi-Fi is a little sticky and so me shooting a video and then not getting the video up I'm trying to be consistent I see I see people on YouTube who ain't talking about nothing worthwhile be consistent be doing videos every day I say man if people who ain't talking about nothing do videos every day if I'm trying to change people lives and help people I need to be doing videos every day can't let devil out work out working so my kids father be upset that I tell him the truth about himself and that I am not afraid to speak up for myself and our child when he is wrong it depends on how you tell them if you tell them what cuss words and you telling them with the intent to hurt them and you telling him you know stuff in a way then that's gonna make him mad and even if you say it nice it's gonna make him mad to you he may respond to you angrily but when you say it with love and respect and in a way that you just want him to be a better person when his head hit the pillow those the words that's that he's gonna hear that's gonna change his life so change the life so you got to understand that the prophetic God God bless me financially my boyfriend not much when marriage should we merge finances and assets with my money be his money um that's the person of choice and it's tough it's tough that's personal choice me personally I don't believe in a woman giving a man her money just because of how we are as men most men we obsess over money because we take a lot of money to live and to live well most men struggle and obsess over money so I never really will condone giving a man money or letting the man have access to your money as men just historically we're not good with it we just ain't good look at you the United States giving us a darn credit score so that we get high interest rates if we miss a payment from even from hardship our credit score drop and then the US old China trillions of dollars do you know what the US credit score look like with the trillions of dollars they owe and so it's like if a whole country can't manage money then you break that down all the way to the person to the head of a household which is typically a demand if you if you marry a lot of men don't know how to manage money either and that's why they say 70% of Americans cannot touch $1,000 right now because we struggle with managing money it's not that we don't make money it's just we struggle with managing money and because we want to live we want to spend we want to have a nicest we want to go out to eat we want to travel and so we want to feel the fullness of our bank account so when it come to money that's a very touchy subject it's a very touchy subject because I'm terrible with money and depending on how you define it I'm not good with money and most people like me are not good with money and then the people who are quote-unquote good with money they really don't live they gonna die with a bank account full of money and it's gonna go to somebody that's gonna squander it cuz they didn't earn they didn't earn it so it's kind of double-edged sword sword as my son always correct me that is sword not sword I'm like they shouldn't put no W in there son my son is 16 not sexually active and has his first girlfriend in high school I don't agree with it but I want to keep the trust me and him have do you have any tips on how to handle this as a parent well for one you should have already had that conversation before he was 16 that there is no girlfriend my son has been being told since he was nine years old son you're not getting a girlfriend you're not getting a girlfriend but lots of parents we try to avoid those conversations thinking that we're going to introduce the child to the conversation no the child already introduced to the conversation from their friends and from social media so you should have been ahead of the situation now you looking for the pound of cure instead of the ounce of prevention so to those of y'all reading her question take the ounce of prevention so you won't need the pound of cure and so in this situation right now I would sit down and talk to him and you got to make it make sense so when you talking to a child you really have to explain it and you got to be able to say listen I don't think you should have a girlfriend and I would like for you to love and remember my beautiful wife to a cocoon God bless you Benjamin God bless you brother Benjamin lost his wife and God bless you and you got to talk to your son and say I don't think you should have a girlfriend and I would like for you to in that and here is why and you help him understand that listen you don't know what love is you don't know what a relationship is and what you're doing by getting a relationship you losing a lifelong friend because y'all are not going to make it 99.9% of the time you're not going to make it and now you've lost this person but now you've also made it harder for you to date someone else at school because she has friends so now you can't talk to any of her friends and you don't even know what love is you don't know what a relationship is you don't know what you want out of life you don't know what you want in a marriage so you got to really break it down and help him understand that this is something that people are doing but they don't know what they're doing and they're doing it because their parents don't talk to them and they're not transparent with them and they're not letting them know that you setting yourself up for heartbreak you setting yourself up for failure and so you got to be able to you know sit down and just pull your heart out just pull your heart out thank you the de God bless you Tony God created man perfect but mankind messed up anyway so be encouraged and training your sons in the right way yep I agree with that you're right about that you are right about that and that's and that's why I am and that's why I'm doing everything I can to prepare and the decision they made I'm trusting but one thing I've seen is if people raise right they typically do right it's typically the people who weren't raised right or didn't have a real example or a very transparent example that get on that wrong path and stay on it so I'm hopeful and I'm believing it's gonna work out I hear a lot of black women say that male worshiping is the reason why we're having a hard time with our men in our community can you give me your thoughts on this well the thing about that is I don't know what male worshiping is and so that's the thing with terms is it only really means something to the author so I can guess but I don't know what that really means by that and when it comes to our relationships that that could be a very real reason if it means what I think it means but I do believe that there's a lack of accountability but it's also but it's on both sides so it's like if if ten of y'all deem words of affirmation and encouragement to these women that are portraying themselves as thoughts or Instagram models to lure men these women who are putting up with cheating putting up with all of this stuff if ten of y'all send a dm they say hey I know it's hard I've been there I've settled but you are beautiful you have an amazing personality you can do better but you gotta believe and trust that you're worth more like all of a window home says that when the mind is stretched to a new dimension it never returns to its original form so there is a lack of self-love in women and so women feel a lot of women feel worthless a lot of women feel less than and most women don't feel like the prize they feel like the man is the prize and so that may be what they mean by male worshiping and so what's happening is you have so many women that are okay that will tolerate cheating that will be okay with a threesome be okay with a foursome that will be okay with their man going to the strip club that will be okay with their man doing these different things and when a woman is going to tolerate things like the gentleman that's here with me his his wife left him and that's what woke him up he could have had any woman he could have had a whole bunch of women but it was the one woman who took a real stance and she she left him and she moved to another state by her leaving him dropping everything and being willing to be alone being willing to be embarrassed by getting a divorce by her doing that then it sent a shock wave through his life and he said this is this is what i need a real woman who loves herself who's going to stand her ground and who's going to respect herself first so we just don't have enough of that like so the same way a good man will be considered a one percent man then a good woman is considered a one percent woman because just as hard as it is for a woman to meet a man who is upstanding and righteous it's becoming equally as hard for a man to meet a woman who is upstanding and righteous meaning not being overly influenced by the media and it's and it's it's hard like every like it is it's hard it's hard and i and what i'm saying is men being influenced by the media in the sense of wanting to be a fake dope boy wanting to be a fake thug wanting to be this rich guy wanting to be this flashy guy so men we go and we do these things i'm guilty of it i got this um watch because i've seen that it's a automar and it's popular it's a popular watch and so i got this watch i'm not really a little watch guy but i got this watch because of it's a popular watch and my wife has lashes she never had lashes but over the last year or so she got lashes and then it's like once she got lashes the people try to do a little bit more a little bit more a little bit more each time and and it's hard you know because it's like okay if everybody got lashes then the women without lashes start to feel like a baby chick that they look like a baby chick meaning a baby chicken and then if if everybody got a booty then the women without a booty start to feel like they look like a teenage boy and so or a teenage girl and so it's like the pressure becomes so great to adapt and to do what everybody else doing that it just leave one percent of men and one percent of women and so that's that's really the issue is just the permeation of the media's messaging into society is just weakening everybody and nobody has a personal identity you know nobody has self-love self-respect put a hashtag cue before your question no comments at this time so only questions in the chat why would a 40 year old man lie about his age when the person he's dating is 29 thank you because he's too old he's too old for the 29 yo is there hope for a 53 year old who clearly lies and avoids to communicate to see three-year-old child he claims since child is three seen consistently isn't a big deal um seeing consistently might not be a big deal you know at three years old he could be right you know people meet their daddy at nine ten fifteen and fall in love with their daddy and live a prosperous life he might be right but at the end at the same time you have to ask yourself personal responsibility why did i have a child with a 50 year old you see i'm saying a lot of times we asking we ask people we ask what is wrong with this person instead of asking what's wrong with me and it's personal responsibility that has to be the number one thing it's personal responsibility and so this is what you bargain for when you have sex with a 50 year old man a man who is crazy enough to have children at 50 and and not be married it's like you can't you can't expect much from that you know if y'all wasn't married and y'all having sex and he's 50 years old if he was available single and available at 50 and didn't marry you what exactly are you expecting from that you see what i mean we grow when we have personal responsibility i remember this guy i heard this story i heard this story and there was this this mother and father they flew out to meet with this counselor and they said you know our son he is you know he's just driving us crazy he spends all this money he's all he does is just shop and he just buys all this stuff he has bad grades you know he just wants to go skiing he's he's out skiing right now and he's just squandering through money he's just wasting all this money the counselor said so where's your son and they said he's out skiing okay and how does your son get money we give it to him okay and where does your son live he lives with us okay he said your son doesn't have a problem y'all have a problem y'all are giving him the money y'all are enabling him y'all aren't holding him accountable y'all flew in for counseling and let your son go live his life your son living up your son living it up he's doing what he's allowed to do he's living great he don't have a problem y'all got the problem y'all don't know how to parent and that thing hit me and so that's why that's what i say the answer a lot of times to our questions there's a quote that says and maybe was by Albert Einstein i don't know it said to every problem there are seeds every problem has seeds to the solution meaning that with your question any question we have about life seeds to the solution lies within us a lot of times the problem is just the repercussions of our choice so the problem isn't with the person it's with us enabling and allowing the person to do what they're doing and we have to realize that we got to realize that somebody asked can you email me um and i you know i want to explain something y'all is you know we have a few people on here right now we got four or five hundred people on here and you know i'm one person and then y'all have to realize too that it's i'm not an entertainer i'm a coach so being a coach it's a lot of people that have a question i seen in my inbox a young lady that i worked with years ago that's trying desperately to have a session with me right now and it's a lot of people that's writing in for a session but i'm not doing one-on-one sessions just because i don't have the time to do one-on-one sessions right now because i have to use that hour to reach tens of thousands of people because i don't know when the lord going to call me home so if i'm using an hour to talk to one person and i only get 24 hours when i talk to one person for an hour i might not even get to talk to my wife for an hour i don't get to talk to my kids for an hour so if i talk to one of y'all for an hour that's an hour i gave away from my family so i only do that in certain seasons and then i have seasons to where i'm not doing any one-on-ones and when i'm doing one-on-ones it's still people will look at it like it's a job or like oh well that's great you make four hundred dollars an hour but in that hour i could make forty thousand dollars in that hour i could make four thousand dollars you see what i'm saying so i have a 20 minute video that that has earned 40 thousand dollars in that hour i could have made three 20 minute videos that is a hundred and twenty thousand dollars so people will look and say oh well for one-on-one you charge four hundred dollars that's a whole lot of money that's money is relative it's relative to where you are and who you are and what type of business you're doing and then how you prioritize your life so i prioritize my time with my wife my time with my kids over four hundred dollars because that gives me clarity and peace so that when i go to work i could create products that earn at scale you see what i'm saying so when i do one-on-ones that's a service that's me being a servant i'm losing money in that hour because that hour could also go to writing a book i write my books in five days so five days and i write about eight hours a day eight times five is 40 hours so in 40 hours i could create a new book that will live for life that will live for the the rest of the world or i could talk to 40 people so what do you think is more impactful so i want you all to understand that that sometimes it's not about people being arrogant and being inaccessible and being and people always say you know oh never change always be accessible and it's easy to say when you're not trying when you're not being accessed so to tell somebody who has three and a half million people online always be accessible that's easy when it's not you being the one tugged on and pulled on but it is it's extremely and i think a lot of time people don't realize that and get mad but that's that's really hard on the mental health if i wasn't walking closely with god i'd be suicidal just because of the weight on me from other people and it's still days that you just feel like that and you got to go fill up and so that's why i go to sporting events you know just to try but even at a sporting event i'm looking at the event like i got a a sweet and i'm going to the games and i'm watching the game from a sweep do you know it's a lot of games i can't even remember a play because my mind don't even be there sometimes because of the work and the load that's on me as a servant of god trying to serve the world and one thing i've noticed in doing this is that i've noticed the selfishness of humans like even when we do these chats it'll be people that'll go off because i didn't see they question and they will literally get mad because i didn't see they question like they don't see a hundred other questions and so i've learned the selfishness of humans i've learned the greed of humans i've learned the inconsideration of humans i've learned that humans don't care about you so you got to care about you i've learned that and that and it'll be very few humans that care about you and but them few humans might not be enough to sustain you so you got to sustain you and you got to have god sustain you and so this is why self-care and boundaries is not selfish and so that's what we got to understand like yeah i could coach one on one and i could make more money like i could make some money doing it but my peace of mind mean more than me and that's why i would talk with tony i didn't talk with tony and i stopped doing talk with tony everybody's like tony do talk with tony do talk with tony them talk with tony is draining because i'm reading the same letter over and over and over and so when you have to think about this like can you imagine how frustrating it'll be if you telling your friend the same thing every single day and they doing the same thing they keep doing the same thing and you telling them the same thing every single day that is demoralizing so even though when you a coach and i'm talking to different people it's just a huge thing it's a it's a huge task because like the young lady she asked tony how to get over a soul tie and that's because she she may be new here so she's saying tony i need to answer to this question but somebody who has been here they're like oh well tony answered that in 10 different videos tony been answering that since 2007 so tony been answering that for 15 years so i i've been answering that for 15 years but i have to answer it for each new person that comes in too so that's a high calling that's a high calling and i'll be honest with you that is why so when i when i watch the men in the dark when i say men in the dark i'm talking about these podcasts these toxic podcast that's i don't know what the titles are red pill men going their own way mantle sphere alpha male strategies these toxic podcasts that just be little women and teach men how to game women whatever term that is and if the ones i said that's not what they do then that ain't talking about them but when i see some of the clips y'all send me and i see men yelling at women cussing women out going off on women i understand it because i realized it's the other side of what i do meaning when you call to it by god you're graced with an amount of patience to help you operate in love but it doesn't mean it's not draining it doesn't mean that it's not extremely frustrating and extremely hard to do but you're giving the peace and the poise to show up with a positive presence but it is the most draining work in the world and i got a homeboy a long time ago he said i got holes in my socks and i said what you mean by that he said people can't see my problems and i was like man because i had holes in my socks at that time and i'm i'm i use i used to wear socks with holes in them like literally so when he said that i know he wore holes with socks with holes in them too and it's probably how he came up with that quote but that thing has stuck with me and guess what your therapist has holes in her socks your therapist has holes in his socks your counselor has holes in her socks your counselor has holes in his socks your coach has holes in his socks your coach has holes in her socks your mama your daddy your sister your brother your pastor your president your principal your police officer has holes in their socks you can't see our problems you can't see their problems so that's why i look at every human as a human and i look at nobody as special than any other human nobody is greater than any other human because we all have holes in our socks so i say that to say when you approach a situation you always have to approach it with the humility that you're not the only person that exists and and that's what i've been seeing you know the young lady she wrote in oh this is not the humble speaker that i met because i'm not doing one-on-one sessions she's saying that i'm not humble because i'm not doing a session with her that she left on the table from two or three years ago and so i offered to refund the session which she don't have a receipt for it i don't have a receipt for it because it's from years ago and so coaching expires within a year and i say that to say is i get that all the time that people have come from years ago when i was 25 dollars an hour i think i had a session left and so i just want you all to understand that when when you have tens of thousands of people tugging on you and you one person i really want you to process that and put that into understanding you tired of your sister calling you you tired of your homegirl calling you your homeboy calling you you tired of your mama stuff you tired of your this your boss your coworker business how you think i feel when i have to read 10 000 opinions a week thousands of questions a week so i want you all to put that into perspective to understand that you know when i be doing this i'm doing it from a place of love from a place of service but it ain't nowhere near as easy as i make it look and and i believe honestly that's maybe why god make it financially rewarding for some people or in certain ways but even then it ain't financial it ain't like a more money than you can spend you know coaches still paycheck to paycheck because they coaching people and they make it money but then from the from how draining it is they spend their money on you know food or out to eat or clothes or vacation trying to get that you know release trying to relax so understand that right now y'all understand that i appreciate you on peace and bait and i think a lot of times you know people don't talk people don't people who doing this don't share that and i feel like if our pastors was more transparent we wouldn't put them on a pedestal if our politicians if our president if our principal if our police officers policy makers were more transparent about the human side of what they're dealing with you remember that guy in in florida the man in florida um the black brother that just seemed so well to do i can't remember his name gilliam or somebody and they found the man in in the orgy with the drugs and all of that right there when when we first seen that man everybody would have said i want my son to grow up to be like him but guess what the brighter somebody light is the darker somebody darkness is so you got to understand that it's spiritual warfare and it's powers and principalities that when you got a light on you the darkness want to cut that light out because the darkness don't like that light to be shining so your attack on your life is gonna be greater than those who are not letting their little light shine the darkness ain't mad at you if you ain't letting your light shine but when you let your light shine the darkness want to be dark but if you got a light shining oh we got to shut that out we got to shut that out we got to shut you up so we finna get you in a scandal we finna get you in some kind of trouble we finna get you in depression we finna get you in suicidal thoughts we finna get you with something to shut you up because you shine that light too bright you see what i'm saying you got to know that you got to be ready for that um trinitia i missed that god bless you trinitia ain't even see that no question god let me here to grow and learn may you continue to be blessed and be a blessing i'll forgive you we got to shoot the day we got to shoot the day let me see if i missed any question hi tony how did you realize your calling in life i'm a pre-med student i just graduated with a double major and minor all stem god let me to open my own ministry and now i feel led to preach go on preach system go on preach just make sure that um that you're doing it for the right reasons that you're not doing it because somebody else doing it that you're not doing it because it look good that you're not doing it because you think it's attached to money or that money come with it make sure you're doing it for the right reasons to be honest with you a lot of time when god call you to something is something you don't want to be called to so i'll be honest with you so sometime when you want to do something That might be that might be reason to pause and to dig a little deeper and evaluate the motives Because I don't want to do what I'm doing I would much rather be in a car club with a car youtube channel You know, I like cars. I got a lot of cars. I would much rather be doing a car channel than to be doing this But i'm called to this because if you notice it's not a lot of men With over a million people online Saying what i'm saying You may know somebody in your community who's saying what i'm saying, but he he hasn't been elevated yet But when you take and look at social media instagram facebook twitter youtube and you combine those numbers You won't find There may be five or There may be five to ten of us black males saying what i'm saying like in this lane in this vein Married faithful and promoting that it probably less than ten of us with over a million Follows online So I say that to say It's a reluctant calling It's something that You ain't you ain't excited about it. It's just something that you know that if you remove your voice There'll be a void in the world That's really your calling because a calling Comes with a burden A calling it's like when you look at moses when he was called He felt inadequate. He felt insecure But he was called When you look at Saul He felt inadequate But he was called to be apostle paul When you look at david he looked inadequate But he was called And so a lot of time what you have to realize about a calling A lot of times we don't look the part. That's why somebody said god don't call to qualify He qualifies to call. That was a great quote. Whoever made that up That was a great quote, but that person probably felt that Don't nobody feel like i'm supposed to be doing what i'm doing I meet people and they they twice my age And they're like how do you got this platform? How do how are you saying what you're saying? How are you doing this out to be saying and doing that and it's because they want to do it That god don't use them Because if you want it so bad That means you're going to want the fame. That means you're going to want the money That means you're going to want the recognition. That means you're going to want the spoils that come with So the men who really want to do what i do It's because they see a $30,000 watch. It's because they see a $300,000 car And they don't realize that it's a lot that goes into that. It's a lot of business. It's a lot of blessings It's a lot of stuff behind the scenes that I do in business that put me in that position That I don't talk about because that's not my calling to talk about business That's why that's why I started the blessed business tribe To help people with some business insight from the businesses I have built Because the world don't know me as A business builder the world don't understand my business savvy and how I market myself and that I run my whole brand by myself The world don't realize that that I talked to a guy. He said he thought I had at least 10 staff and So the world don't understand my business acumen And how I built the business out of my brand They just see tony talk on relationships. So I get questions all about relationships. No matter what space I could literally go do a business podcast and they'll ask me relationship questions And so I say that to say your calling Is oftentimes different than your passion Your purpose is oftentimes different than your passion But you can become passionate about your purpose So a lot of times people say just follow your passion Well, I'm passionate about singing But I cannot sing So and that's what I talk about in my course entrepreneurship with purpose And I draw this parallel between Trying to marry your passion with your or your gifts with your passions Because sometimes they're different and I see a lot of time people passionate about something and I see a lot of time people are passionate about something And they're not good at it But they're passionate about it because it challenges them and it makes them feel alive I saw a lady the other day who has a channel And she is singing And she is very very serious. She is singing very seriously And it and it do not sound good It does not sound good. And I am not a tough critic like I usually say somebody could say When they barely could say And then later do not sound good And it showed up on my on my popular page And I was like lord. Oh, no. Oh, no, and that is a That's when somebody pursuing a passion, but it's not their gift or their purpose So that's what that's what we got to understand So what exactly do you enjoy as business? I enjoy creating, you know, that that's what I enjoy creating, but I don't necessarily enjoy business honestly. I enjoy living. I enjoy time with my family But we have to do business to take care of our family But I'm not it business is not, you know, it's fun in the sense of creating and trying something new doing something, but It's equally as stressful so the enjoyment come from Being able to go on a vacation with your family being able to buy my wife Adult outfit nice pair of shoes, you know that type of stuff, but Work is work, you know work is work. Your purpose is your purpose. You're calling as you're calling And y'all remember the greatest whoever walked the earth for jesus christ And y'all remember he went up to the mount top and went to pray and to his father and he said father if there's anything Is there any way that this cup could be passed from me? Now, rightfully so his calling was very very But he was born for it He was born for it He was built for it He was purposed for it and still tried to run from it when his only reason for existing was to fulfill the purpose of salvation And he still tried to run from it So to be honest with you To everybody on here Your purpose may be the thing that you're running from Your purpose may be the thing that you're scared of the thing that you Want to do the least That may be where your purpose is because What we passionate at Passion a lot of times coincides with pleasure I told him how can I get my finance? Fiance sorry about that To communicate Without we argue it could be The simplest thing Example he comes home the door He comes home the door to bed R is unlock He said it was lock Make a big deal out of it. You know, you gotta you gotta sit down and talk to him and say Hey, you know, um, so how are things going? Like how things going like how's how's work going? Like how do you like it? Okay, uh, who do you like? Hmm. Why don't you like him? Well, who do you like? What is it about him that you like? Hmm. You see what I'm saying? We've never had those conversations and nobody really has those conversations with men Nobody really asked those questions. Like, you know, how are you doing? And so it It's not about the door being locked. It's really about his stress It's really about the pressure that he feels It's really about the the sense of Inadequacy or failure. And so you have to instead of addressing That You got to address the underlying, you know, and just talk to him Why does it seem like Man, I've been on here too long. I've been on here too long I'm gonna take a few more questions and you get going. Oh, let me see what What time we got? Just trying to make sure I ain't got no time for my shoot and a picture of my son up where Thigh's big when we got a big old muscle in that leg Y'all forgive me now. Y'all forgive me Why does it seem like guys like mean girls that want their money? But it seemed like for me me not asking for anything get me literally nothing not even a date um You know guys don't like mean girls guys like confident Women guys like strong women If you too nice Sometimes you get ran over And so you have to understand and you got to assert you got to assert yourself So you got to feel worthy and ain't about asking for money But you got to feel worthy of that date being paid for and you saying thank you versus You not letting him pay for the date and so that's what you got to understand And I was saying it to my son last night. We were just talking about stuff and I said If if they don't if they don't fear you they might not respect you And if they respect you they might not fear you And really what I was talking about is just how in life Sometimes you got to get that respect. You got to demand that respect. You got to require that respect Especially from a man because if a man don't respect you you really don't want you like if you too easy if you a push over Then you really don't want it If you had 10k to invest with which direction Would you go to maximize gains? I wouldn't Focus so much on the gains I would focus more on purpose and legacy Because it's you can make money like I put money I bought a bitcoin I bought a bitcoin when it was three thousand dollars And I sold a bitcoin When it was at 50 57 thousand dollars After I sold the bitcoin a bitcoin I still had something after I sold a bitcoin at 57 thousand dollars It went all the way down to 30 thousand dollars so It's like gains could come from anything 3000 turn into 60 000 with a bitcoin Same thing with stock market 10 000 could become 20 000 in a year with a certain stock it in Could have been tesla a year or two ago but You really have to think about the intrinsic value So I I know this um I got a partner who a bit who come from a billionaire family And I remember when we first started Investing in stuff he was saying I look for intrinsic value And so if it's something that you could be a part of so if I had 10 000 dollars If you have a heart and a passion For cooking Then you literally could start a restaurant for 10 000 dollars. It might be a walk-up window That cost 750 dollars a month for that little business like mine did But I didn't run it and that was my passion so it went out of business in a year But if I was a cook And I was cooking and had one person working the window That business would be booming because they was making 1200 dollars a day out of my restaurant But the food cost was 200 to 300 dollars a day So it was profiting 900 dollars a day and it was open six days a week So nine times six Is 5400 dollars a week Now this was a walk-up window in in a black neighborhood And it was just a little building it was just a little building And you come up to the window and it had a kitchen in there So if you are a cook To get in there it was 750 for the rent. So to get in it was first and last month. So it was 1500 dollars Got to turn on the gas turn on the lights turn on the water Gas lights and water each month came to about 750 dollars For all three of them the rent was 750. It was 1500 dollars The food cost 300 dollars worth of food the neighborhood coming to the window They buying oxtail. They buying turkey wings. They buying chicken wings Collar green mac and cheese chitlins They buying this right here It's making 1200 dollars a day 900 all profit if I was the cook Yes, I'm tired. But if I love cooking I could do that for the rest of my life So it ain't just about the games I honestly believe And I think I'm the one made this go viral And then everybody starts saying it Because I was on twitter going viral in 2010 The best investment you can make is in yourself My returns I got a business That cost me I got one business That cost me 99 dollars a month And it make on a minimum of 10,000 dollars a month But it's in my lane It's in my it's my business It cost 99 dollars a month to manage and to run And it make 10,000 dollars a month at minimum If I look across the course of a year But see this is in me. I'm investing in me So if I look over the course of a year The business average 58,000 dollars a month in revenue in profit It costs 99 dollars a month To maintain and manage It's a website So in a website Have content So 58,000 dollars a month 99 dollars, but that's an investment in me Now the content may cost me Cost me one time Producing content But then the content live forever So then the work comes and the investment comes in building a brand Posting every day online to get a follow-up But where on the stock market Can you pay 99 dollars A month and make 60,000 But if you in your purpose and you in your gifts Eventually it can get there. It might take you five years 10 years But when you invest in you you eventually going to be profitable because you doing the work You putting the time in and it's based on you So I could put 10,000 dollars into tesla But if Elon Musk tweets something stupid In 24 hours my 10,000 dollars is 5,000 dollars But if I put 10,000 dollars into me into my barbershop Into my salon into my coaching business And then I start doing the work It might take me 12 months to make 10,000 dollars But if I keep going i'm eventually going to be making 100,000 dollars Or 50,000 dollars off of that 110,000 So that's how you got to think about investments. A lot of times people come and they say Tony how our best money invested in you Identify your gifts Not just your passion not your gifts A gift is different could can be different than a passion A gift is what you could do naturally that not everybody can do Not everybody can do it doesn't ask for a graphic designer I would ask my mentee if we had a shoot time for the For our interview but I'm we ain't got none. So I'm still working. Why them they out working my child's father best friend Just passed away yesterday. He called me crying. It was very upset and beating himself up for not seeing his friend before he passed How can I support them? Well, that was yesterday's system. So, you know that day has passed He got through the day And all you can do is just be there for him just send him a text. How are you? Just like that. See what he's saying get on the phone with him If he call you and just listen Support isn't always about giving or doing sometimes just about being there just being there being quiet Just listening being a support system. I really appreciate y'all because y'all be asking me about everything Now see can y'all imagine if the lord let me live till 60 years old I'm gonna be I'm gonna be on somebody couch. I'm gonna be on bill my own couch. I'm gonna be doing Ted talks Y'all be asking me something everything I Listen ain't got all I ain't got all the answers now. Sorry. I'm checking with my wife How do I tell my husband? I don't want to have that. We waited until marriage to move in Tell my husband Now I realize we don't know each other Well, it turns me off He's a great guy. I tell you what now That's your husband. So it sounds like y'all gonna have to go to counseling And Y'all gonna have to talk through this I also don't know Because you got really you really got to identify The mistakes because you don't have to live with somebody to know somebody Because nothing changed when you live with somebody in the sense of Yeah, you gonna see a little you might smell you look gas air 90 and but That won't matter if you got to know the person before you got married meaning talking an hour or day spending that time like if If a man marries a woman and he got to know her and he loves her and she accidentally forget to take her Tampon out before she get in the shower And she take that out and sit it on the side of the shower and it end up getting left there or sitting on top of the trash can It's gonna gross him out But if he loved her that ain't gonna Change nothing if a woman loved a man And he'd get in the bed and he go to turn over and he passed gas That's gonna gross her out But it ain't gonna make her not want to Have sex with him or Be ready for a divorce So the issue is y'all didn't get to know each other before the marriage and now y'all need to get to know each other So y'all need to date every single week y'all need to sit down and talk an hour a day Y'all need to keep courting keep dating and don't just try to go right to marriage But you also got to realize that's your husband So when it's your husband, you know There's going to be time as married people Where sex feels like a chore Because we tired or what have you but because we are with this person If they want to be intimate We have to get over ourselves and be intimate because we chose To marry this person Now If we express and there's love and you express i'm not feeling good then that person love you they're gonna respect that So that's also something so just having that conversation. He's not god And that's one thing I understand with women is a lot of times and that might be what the lady was talking about male worshiping A lot of times women, you know women y'all ask me so many times. How do I tell this to my husband? How do I say this to my hub just say it? That's not god. That's a man like what you scared of like Hey, you know Just say it It's like you dealing with a man like We be so ready We'll we don't mind sinning against god Who controls and who holds our future? But be scared to talk to a human Like we have to really bring it down to that right there level and say why am I scared to talk to a human? But I ain't scared to sin against god Who holds my future and grace and mercy? You see what i'm saying? Gotta look at it like that Hey, if y'all ask one question Don't ask the second question If you see it's other people who have asked the question that I ain't got today question You know, make sure you don't try to turn this into no one-on-one session Because we got a few people on here. All right, my boyfriend has these bouts where he tells me he doesn't deserve me And to stop trying To care about And to stop trying to care about or understand him He also says he doesn't love himself What are your thoughts on this? He's crying out for help So he wants you to love him. He wants you to care about him. He wants you to talk to him He's crying out for help So Get him a good book Get him a good audio book watch something good on netflix Go out the dinner do dates set up dates give him a week heads up Hey next friday night. I said I scheduled us a day that such and such Gonna be a great time. Let me know Do you need anything as far as outfit wise or What have you get them engaged get them active Those like little signs of his his, you know, many depressions and That's really a man crying out for some attention and for some help That's all that is My 13 year old son is playing mom against dad to get his way Asking to live with dad since I'm strict, but it's not in his best interest. How do I tell him know without being the villain? You can't tell him know without being the villain But you can't worry about being the villain and if he's doing that it's really because you got some holes in your consistency So you got to be consistently strict And you got to be strict in love and you also got to have a reward system So if he's doing good and he's doing good things, okay, that's a new pair of shoes or a special outing So you can't just have a punishment system. You got to have a reward system And so he gets something good for the good, but he also realized he get chest ties for the bad And and that'll let him know that okay. It's not just about being strict that this is coming from love Hey, y'all, I appreciate you. We've been on here two hours. God bless you I tried to answer some of these here questions and y'all got to forgive me for being long-winded on some of just some of them take a little bit more in depth explanation, but I appreciate you for the questions and Thank you to the moderators for helping out. This is saturday. I appreciate y'all helping out and showing up on here And making this look easier for me. And thank you to the new Blessed member. I mean the blessed tribe members and the blessed business tribe for joining and to the patreon Um I'll be releasing some more exclusive content for patreon here soon To where they showed me now. I could upload native video. So I may do that So I don't have to put it as an unlisted link on youtube So thank you for that if and again, don't join patreon until the first Because it charge you on the first of each month. So if you join today It'll charge you again on the first and so unless you have the money But if you don't want to be charged two times that close then Just wait. Well for the patreon. I'm gonna be putting some exclusive Courses over there That's just for patreon like just little videos maybe like four videos that that make up one topic one course What I'll be doing that just because it's a different level of support over there on patreon because blessed tribe is $1.99 And on patreon, it's a whole another system and then to with that we're going to be actually Producing so for the support that's over there on patreon. I actually have not touched the money I haven't touched the support like they patreon just holding it You got to go in and do a manual withdrawal um I believe Or or maybe if you don't withdraw they send it on a certain date, but I haven't touched it because I'm gonna use That support specifically for projects So that'll be going right back into producing For the youtube So the patreon the patreon was just y'all to get early access unless it'll mess up the premiere or something You'll get early access but understand the patreon is just the support in the productions of like titles the show And and the reality production the unscripted things. That's what that's for and You know, so I appreciate y'all for supporting over there like that and lastly the life coach certification Is $500 less it was 1500. I made it a thousand just to make it more affordable because my mentor dot life we got Coaches on there But it still need more coaches and if you join my mentor dot life Make sure that you don't just join Just trying to patch yourself on the back to feel like you're doing something if you join my mentor dot life Take it serious because right now we're dealing with a coach who Got on there got booked Probably thinking that he wasn't going to get booked and missed the session rescheduled the session missed the session again And so now the ad men they emailing me saying hey, can we refund this client? and I'm like He needs to refund her For getting the butt on here and missing the session So y'all understand I created my mentor dot life, but I'm not They are independent professional coaches when you book a coach on my mentor the money go to the coach The money don't come to me the money go to the coach And so y'all have to when you book a session If the coach don't show up and the coach don't reschedule call PayPal And tell and PayPal will refund you the money and then the coach got to pay that money back to PayPal and if they if you call them one time they don't do it call them again and The money come from you pay through PayPal But that's connected to your bank account Or to your credit card or your debit card So a PayPal don't give you the money back call your call your bank or call your credit card And they'll refund you say I paid for a service and I didn't get it I don't scan the system if you've got the service And so what I'm saying is the reason why we have coaches that didn't take my life code certification They took other certifications and they get on there A big part of my certification and reason why I created my certification is to teach integrity So I teach on integrity in my certification and and I kind of Punching you in the chest when you in that course. So the part about self-evaluation We didn't have people stop right there Because they started feeling like man. I ain't got my heart right I'm not ready to coach a lot of people don't care about that. I want coaches with integrity So that's why I created the life code certification And it's people charging five thousand ten thousand twelve thousand dollars for a certain life code certification And it's just not that it's not that deep. It's just not that deep I just I can't bring my heart to charge nobody ten thousand dollars in this climate And so it's a thousand dollars. It's still an investment No, it's not a payment plan because people do the payment plan pay one month Take the course in one month get the certificate and then don't finish the payment plan Again, low integrity no integrity And so I had to remove the payment plan so that the scammers and the coaches without integrity can't come still a certificate And then get on my mentor dot life and then be missing sessions So I'm trying to do my part to create an ecosystem And to have the coaching industry with some integrity and some class and some decency So people who don't want therapy or who don't need therapy can hire a coach And still feel taken care of respected In all of that and I can't do one-on-ones right now But I'm talking to three and a half million people online So It's a lot of people that want a coaching session But because I can't coach everybody. That's why I created my mentor dot life so whereas a lot of coaching certifications they've taken your money To regurgitate some information To you but then they don't have a platform for you to get booked by clients And it take time to get booked and your page got to be set up right to get booked So you got to understand that So hey god bless y'all and we'll talk soon Thank you again moderators. I really appreciate you. I've not seen mama tish and share on that a day if if glam rocks and Caramel kisses on the shout out to y'all too. God bless I'm on the computer. So I have to figure out how to end this on the computer now And for those y'all I know I ain't at home. I'm in a bed in breakfast So I love colton. He got it freezing right up behind his head