 Oh my gosh, it's been so long. Oh my goodness. It's been forever. It's nighttime here. What is it there? Nighttime. It's noon here, so lunch. I just have some peanuts. I just had dinner. I'm trying not to eat as much. Oh. Nothing's working. Let's just be honest. I know. Thyroid shot. It's all shot. 40s, early 50s. Welcome. 40s are, I'm telling you, it's nobody warned you. Like why were all the previous generations gatekeeping this information? Yeah, I don't understand. Even when they do talk to you, they're like, oh, perimenopause, menopause? That last 10 years, like, wait, wait, what? What? I spent all, I spent my 20s and 30s, pregnant, nursing, you know, carrying around baby weight and I'm thinking the 40s are gonna be it. No, no. Yeah, they don't tell you everything just shuts down. All of the shop shuts down in your 40s and you're like, no, no, this is when I actually have slept eight hours. So now I should be like starting to get back to my, well, I think we think we can go back to 20. Everything hurts. Everything hurts, I get out of a chair and it's like everything is tight and it takes a minute to kind of like uncramp everything and my kid's looking at me like, what's wrong? Right. I have to stretch immediately leaving the bed. Immediately. What? And like, then you even have pain when you're laying in the bed, like my knees. If I lay on them like wrong, like on top of each other like this, they all of a sudden I wake up in the middle of the night with severe pain and okay, I'm not even doing anything. No, I'm not doing anything here. I live in an apartment and somebody just tried to, I don't know what that was. Anyway, so I went to get up this morning and I didn't know that like, I really have to think about sitting up, then rolling. You know what I'm saying? Ork, roll, then sit up. So I tried to do both and nearly got myself a hernia out of the whole thing. And I'm like, honestly, 47 should not be the new 95. I mean, this is dumb. No, I know. Nobody tells you. Nobody tells you. Okay, but then listen, and listen, if you guys are watching this, like let me know. Okay, so if you see pictures of like your parents or your relatives when they were in their 40s or 50s and you're like, holy crap, they look old. Is that what I look like? Yes. Oh, it's so bad. I don't know if the style was just bad, you know? Like that just on the 70s and 80s styles did not do good on the 40, 50 year olds. And like, especially the men like, what are you wearing? Listen, it didn't do good for us. I go back to look at those pictures in like sixth grade. I have feathered my hair by putting it in the middle. What? And feathered it. You did not put it in the middle. Yes. And then my collar is up, cause that helps everyone. My collar is up. And, you know, this is before braces. So you got teeth coming out of everywhere. This is when your kneecaps are bigger than your thighs. And you think you're good looking. So I got all sorts of pictures. And I'm like, mom. Your faucet going on, your little... Oh, yeah. Oh, mm-hmm. Yep. And I'm an old child. And braces and the, you know, what are we wearing, weirds. Anyway, I don't know. I'm like, I look at those pictures of my parents and I'm like, how old are you there? Hey, and the amount of money. Okay. My grandma used oil of au lait. Yes. I tried to use that, nearly burned my face right the heck off. So I don't know what's in it now. But the amount of money we spend now on all that stuff, my mom did not spend a dime. I think she used Dove. Dove's so... Listen, listen, let's talk about this. Do you have a same time as skincare routine? Oh, I do now because I have scared myself when I get up in the morning and I'm like, whose face is that? It's not mine. It's so true. It is scary. So yeah, I'm dropping money like it's hot for anything that'll... But do you do it? Do you do it? Every day? Do you do it every day? You know I have issues with discipline and consistency. Because that gives me a rash. It's a lot of work to be consistent and real boring. I gotta just kind of fly by the seat of my hand. That's a great topic too. It's boring. You know... It's boring! You know, okay, can I just say, I had a thought this morning because I met this lady. She's a little bit older than me. She's always going to the gym every day, 6 a.m. And she's like, and I asked her about it randomly and she was like, well, it's like my only me time. And I'm thinking... You wanna go... If this is your only me time, that's not what I'm doing. That is not... Press alert! That is not what I'm doing. It's not what I'm doing. Only me time. Is it real? Is she just saying that? Is it her excuse for whatever she's running away from? I don't know. But I'm just like... If that's your only me time, I am in bed watching... Bed! Go on my phone, scrolling. This is what I'm doing. Come on, people. I'm wearing this. Wearing it. And I'm out. I don't want anybody to talk to me. Don't talk to me. I want somebody to bring me a cupcake and lie to me and tell me it's fat-free, sugar-free and it won't bother me. Yes, yes, yes. And so, I don't know. So we look like our... I mean, I don't feel like I look like my parents did at this age, but maybe they're a little thinner. But... But yeah, so, yeah, the night time... That's it. I remember my grandmother had it and people always are saying how nice her skin is and I just always thought it was... Yes. I don't know what you're saying. Yeah, well, my grandma's skin was great, but she had no teeth. So she pulled those suckers out at night. I don't care what your skin looks like. No. So hide my grandmother's teeth and then she'd get up in the morning and we would go hysterical. Right. I mean, they're scary. It's the first Snapchat filters. No teeth. So when they come for you, they're going to give you a kiss. It's literally like a vacuum suction. Oh, it's not pretty. It's a whole film. It really is. So, you know, I love that that was the first Snapchat filter and we didn't have really... You had the film camera so it took forever and a decade to go get them printed. So nobody got a picture of that. I know, nobody got it printed. It's the first Gen X Snapchat filter. Your grandmother with no teeth. Come in, I am. Yeah. Now the Snapchat filter looks like you are on some kind of heavy dose of meth. It's so bad. I hate those when they're left on and I turn it on and I phase like... Oh! Traumatizing. I'm like, no, now I'm going to have a nightmare. Okay, okay. Skincare routine, back to the skincare routine. Yes. You bought all the crap because, well, you're in America and so I don't blame you because if I was there, I probably wouldn't have it all. Oh, yeah. I have a whole... Yeah. So I literally, I'm like this. I about spend 10 seconds. Then I go into bed and I know I shouldn't because I'm not at the age, I shouldn't. But then I go listen to this true story. I go on vacation with my daughter who's 15 and every night she puts this thing on like this. And then she has like the steps that she's going through and she's 15, like, what are you doing? And she literally, and I'm like, well, let me try it. Let me try it. She says, no, she paid for it. Anyway, that's, you know, my bad on the parenting. But like 15, she doesn't need stuff and she just literally turns to me. This is not a joke. She turns to me and says, well, you know, I need to have better skin than you when I'm that age. Yep. This is when, you know, you can't smack people anymore. You're not allowed to do that. But that would be the appropriate setting. Okay. Can I hear it from the 80s, anyone? Thank you. Mine, you are not gonna believe this. Sophie, it's nine o'clock at night. She's also 15 with a skincare routine. Okay. She says, mom, we got to go. I am in for the night. It is nine PM. I have my jammies on. Where are we going? She goes, I am out of hydraulic, hydro, high. Yes, yes, yes, yes, I know. My daughter has it. Yeah, some sort of acid. I keep, I feel like you're talking about oil that goes in a car. But anyway, it's, and she had to have it. We had to go. You guys, we have like nine bazillion makeup stores, Sephora, Alta, you get in there. I can't. I can't. So we had to go do that. Yes, because it's poor parenting on my part. Okay. I know. It's also that it's open. See, like New Zealand, nothing's open and it has like five, 30 or six. So. Are you serious? Dead. Yeah, there's literally nothing open. It is, this is not the place for nightlife. No. So things are open to like nine, but COVID ruined us for the rest of time because stuff used to be open late, late, late. Now it closes. So I don't know what these poor people are going to do, our children. They're going to have to learn how to wait. I have acid for their 15 year old. Acid. And the fact that she wouldn't share it with me and like she was like, Oh. Like all that I've done for you. Oh, this is when I talked about how long labor was and where they came from. Yeah. How they got here. Exactly what I did. And then I literally saw a video that I sent to her yesterday of a mom who goes into her daughter's room, does this and starts playing with all her makeup and she's kind of looking around like hoping she doesn't see her. Yes. I'm like, holy cow, that's me. Like I have sneak and use it and I'm going to use it because whatever I give you everything, you can share a little lip gloss. Okay. Do you remember Gen Xers in the house? Did we, did we just go do whatever we wanted with our mother's things? No. No. My daughter, I'll be like, hey, hey, hey. I need the tweezers. I mean, I got a hair coming out of places that it shouldn't be. And it is like wiry. I can't find my little, my little tweezers. Well, Steppenfetch, my 15 year old, she's got it along with the six other things that I bought just the other day for myself. Did she ask me? No. Uh-oh. Nope. The doors, it's also hers. This is how it is. Correct. Yeah. 2024. Uh-huh. This is cool. No, I know. And then they have the nerves in that even put, they're not even trying to hide it. Oh, they're not. Oh, there's no, no. With that lid off in their bathroom and like, just use my stuff. And listen, I'm not a smoker. No offense to anybody who is. I don't want to do that. But the amount of perfume that is sprayed up in this two bedroom apartment, I could die of some sort of toxic long overload. And then I'm trying to enjoy coffee and it's literally like a nuclear bomb has gone. You know, it's like, shh. I'm like, it's so bad. No, it's true. I literally, I have to walk down the stairs and make sure the kids are up for bed and I go down two steps and I smell it and I know she's up. Yep. Back to bed I go. Okay, so sorry, we just kind of jumped right in here guys. If you don't know who we are, we are friends, Christy and Tara and she lives in the US and we were friends when we were in college age and I live in New Zealand currently and we've had Tara Christy's show on this channel and it's great. And you can just click on the playlist that I will put up there for you and watch us on all the other shows. But so yeah, so it's just been a really long time and I'm just bringing her on and we just kind of started talking and it's just real talk. It's just girl talk. It's just girlfriend talk. It's whatever it is. Yeah, this is what we do. Yeah, so I actually asked the community for some questions or things they want to talk about because they're dying. I mean, guys, people have been begging where's Christy, where's Christy everywhere? And so you guys are the best. I know. Okay, so good. So are we doing in America versus New Zealand? As in we grill and don't seasoning along and slow unless it's speaking? Well, what? Okay, what? If you discuss cooked school lunches versus bring your own packed sausage rolls, pies, price, nutrition, thank you. So if you don't know Christy, like there's no hot lunches here. Like everybody does. What do you mean? And there's no cafeteria with an option for hot food that someone makes for you. Everybody brings our own food. So in a high school here, like there might be a cafe where people could buy something and they'll just have like two or three items. But a lot of times that's a whole separate business. It's not school related. And it's not true. Really? So. Oh, no. So basically you people are healthy. That's what I'm hearing. So hot lunch. Cause you used to be a lunch lady. Give us all the point. I did. A lot of cans, a lot of opening cans, a lot of frozen, warm it up in the oven. A lot of, you know, there's just a lot of preservatives. And yeah, it's for people like me who they can't plan ahead to save their ever loving life. And because in America, we go 900 miles an hour, we'd rather spend $50 a month on hot lunch than going to get cold lunch and make it for our children. Or that's just me. So it's like, I would say, is it probably about three bucks a meal every day, I would say. And you get a protein, a fruit, a veggie and your choice of milk or juice. If you want any extra milk or chocolate milk. Correct. Oh. I remember that in my kids, they love the hot lunch because they remember it finally because they don't have it here. And of course my kids are old enough where they're making their own lunch. Like I haven't made my own for years. So, you know, not that they're eating healthy because they're, you know, their choices. So what do they put in that much? Yeah, I still have to prep. Like if I don't have like salads, my daughter doesn't like sandwiches, but she'll eat salad. So as long as I have something in there, she'll eat it, you know. And she'll, but I have to prep it a little bit cause you know, kids are not eating vegetables unless they're cut up by somebody else and organized. Yeah. Oh. And even in that, I keep buying vegetables for my darn self and I keep tossing them at seven days every time. Dang it. Cause I even think if somebody else washes it and cuts it up, this was not hard. I just pull it out and eat it. But if it's anywhere near the chocolate pudding in my fridge, I just don't seem to get to it. I know I love it. Does anybody else? Chocolate pudding in the US, oh my gosh. It's with whipped cream. With whipped cream and a couple of chips on top. I have, I make it healthier because I love it because it's, you know, it's a low calorie dessert and it just feels delicious cause that's the key, right? You mentally feel like you're eating something that you like in order to actually continue on. Correct. Yeah. Every diet plan, I have to have a treat or I can't do it. No, I know. So here's the thing that I've been thinking about diets and work with me here because unfortunately every time I look at like content for Gen X, it's always around losing weight, always. It's, I don't know. Like, can we not be concerned about something else? Like we finally got through this. We could start a whole new life right now but we're just gonna concern about this anyway. It's important. You should get yourself sorted. I'm not saying that you shouldn't, but it's not everything. No, but I think we're all shocked. We don't still fit in the size six. Right. Like they're double digits all of a sudden and we're like, what? So here's- I didn't do anything different. Yeah, here's my problem with dieting and what I'm, okay, so for years now. I mean, I even went through to a hypnotherapist. You got to help me with this or something in there. Yeah. Like I can't figure it out. This is awesome. Yeah. On my own, right? And so I've been really thinking about, I've been trying to be really honest with myself and really honest about what I'm thinking when I want to go eat that or when I do. You know, because it shows like nobody can hide it. Okay. No, no. You're not hiding anything. Okay. No, you're not hiding the thing, guys. You're not hiding the thing. So I think the problem for me is like the problem with diets is that they kind of ruin you forever because like the thought of going on a diet and then your body remembers that feeling of being hungry. And it's like, all you want to do is avoid feeling at all costs. Like I don't want to feel that horrible hunger. That's what I think it is, okay? I think that's really the problem. If someone can give us a solution and don't send me things like, I eat more than I used to. And it's all that food that I don't want to eat that. No, I don't want to hear that. Plus, here's the thing. I've been through enough trauma in my life. So your 20s and 30s, you know, when you have signed up for what I would call Jerry Springer which I did not know I signed up for that, but I did. When you hit your 40s and all of a sudden your metabolism is not working, your thyroid's not working, your face, all of a sudden has six chins. You have no answer. Your hormones are not working, correct? Everybody. People, you just hate people. Yeah, the diet thing not happening because let me tell you what I want. Yeah, what do you want? After Jerry Springer. I want comfort. You know what comfort is? Whip cream on a cloudy day. It is a lot of chocolate, a lot of peanut butter because I like to lie to myself and say it's protein. So you just add that in with the ice cream and then the chocolate syrup on top. And here's the problem. You just want some comfort. You want somebody, you come home from work. You just want somebody to say it's okay. You're gonna lose 10 pounds someday, not today. That's what I want. So this is what I did like last year when before I came to the U.S. and Europe or whatever, I was like, okay, so for one month I'm going to eat low carb. I'm not gonna do no carb. Like I'm not stupid. Like I'm just gonna be like I already hate people and then like murder will happen without carbs. This is, that should come with a warning. There should be a warning on all females that are currently dieting. So people know to watch out. Watch out. Watch it. So I decided I'm not gonna listen to anybody. I'm gonna be like honest with myself about what I'm thinking. I know what has ever worked. You've tried everything, what has worked. Obviously less bread works, less pasta works. Has worked, you know. And so, okay, this is what I'm gonna do. I'm not gonna do low carb. I'm not gonna pick a number. I'm not gonna like stress because I know all of those things I lose. I cannot maintain it. And I lose and I run the other way. I'm not gonna make myself, weigh myself every day. I'm not gonna do all these stupid rules. I understand the, don't come at me, okay? I know. So what I did was I took, this is what I wanna eat. You know, like this is what we normally make. This is what we make, hamburgers, tacos, you know. Yes. Sonja, whatever it is, butter chicken, I love it, right? And so I'm like, I'm gonna make all of these things healthier. I'm just gonna make what I'm already eating without the carbs. So I had cauliflower rice instead of rice. And I made bread with cheese. And it was, and I'm, you know, and it was effort. It was just definitely effort, you know? But it was more motivating because I was gonna make something that I think will actually be good. And then I actually already mentally want to eat. You know what I mean? And I can't eat the bun. Like I'm not eating the, I'm not eating a hamburger without a bun. I'm not. Like, where am I putting all of my condiments and my vegetables? Yeah. Because the lettuce isn't over yet. Just, and it works. I think I lost six pounds, seven pounds in a month. That's great. Good. But then I came there. Well, and everything's here. Cheese curds. Oh, and then when I'm there and I'm only there for a short time, I eat everything and then it's over. So anyway, it was good. Yeah, so, and I'm trying to do that again, but it's not really working because I'm feeling like it's a lot of effort right now. It's a bit busy. So, you know, you just need to prioritize yourself and I still struggle with that. So if anybody's got some tips. Oh, that's just forever. I think if you're a mom or working woman of any sort and you're our age, you just are, it's like, there's no time for you. And we've been teaching ourselves that for so long that it almost feels wrong when we go, oh, actually I'm not gonna drive you around like an unpaid Uber. I'm actually going to just sit my butt here and you'll be fine for a whole 30 minutes. You can wait. My daughter cannot wait. She is like, listen, I get done with school at three. We're gonna need you there at 2.45. I'm gonna need you to park in the parking lot because I'm not walking any further than the four steps out the front door. I don't know about you. I had to walk home. And it was not a block. I walked home. I ran from a car that tried to kidnap me. I mean, this is the 80s. We survived. We survived. Metal, metal slides. We survived. Metal slides. With no sides, like people. What in the world is wrong with our parents? And it was like straight up like the Eiffel Tower. Straight up. And then no sides. It's hotter than a red wagon, which means your skin gets left up top. As you go down, oh my dear Lord. But look at us. We will survive. Jen Exers, let's hear it. Are you here? Are you here? Yeah, it's like, I've tried to fight. I've tried to fight those battles myself. And it's just, it's more work dealing with them complaining at me. Then it is. Correct. This is why I'm like, fine. 245 parking less. I'm there. I'm not even gonna, you know, it's just like, you know, but then my husband, he'll go and pick her up. And if she's not exactly there at the time, he leaves. So that's a lot helpful for me. Thanks. Thanks for that. Yeah. My ex-husband? Well, you weren't there. Well, you just got to answer the phone. You wouldn't, you weren't there. So figure it out. She's had a clock at night. She's a female. Okay. Right. Paula. Could you? No, they can't. They're set, they're like, you will not inconvenience me. And I'm like, that's all I've been ever since these people showed up. I don't understand that. I want to be like that. Can I be like that? I know. I want to be like. I want to be them. They can sleep when these children are nowhere around. I know. They can sleep. And they don't worry about anything. Zero worry. They don't think about and he's just like, it doesn't even enter into the mind. They just sleep on. You know. And I'm just like, oh my gosh. Constant. It's constant. And I feel like I worry because you're not worrying. Like if I felt like you're correct, then I could relax about it, you know? And I don't know, but I mean, we're moving towards being more like men, right? We're losing our estrogen. We could not be more masculine right now. Oh, I'm going there. And we don't care. Right here. Yeah. I'm going to have a mustache at no time. Maybe a little chin hair, maybe a goatee. I don't know. But I'm losing my hair here. It grows here. What? I don't understand. Zero. I understand zero. And like you said, as I get older, you care very little about what I look like. I actually look like Walmart people now. You know, when you would make, you know, we used to make fun of, there was a Walmart kind of type of person. That's anybody over 45. Nobody cares. Nobody cares. Nobody cares now. But we're in the same clothes and that ugly card again. You got it. Mr. Rogers on steroids over here. With our hair. I got every color. Look crazy. Look like this. Oh, that's what I got today. Like this. I tried to beach wave my hair and that didn't go well. So it went up in a pony because it's just bad. Well, how did you try to beach wave it? Well, because I was going out. So I had to look to you. How, how? Oh, you take a straightener. Yeah. You take a little piece of hair and you turn it away from your face. I was doing it wrong. I put everything towards my face. Don't do that. Get it away. I find that very hard. I find that very hard. This is what you do. So you get your 15 year old daughter who's been giving you nothing but crap all week long and you have them do it. That's what I did. It worked out just fine. Is our people asking us anything about, you know, what do they want to know? Guys, I can do this all day about nothing. You're so distracting. I can't. Okay. So somebody also asks about what matters in life and do, do we feel more fulfilled in the US or New Zealand in terms of what matters? So obviously that depends on the person in terms of what matters in life. I think that we could all agree to health, safety, low stress, you know? And I think that, I think that you can get it. You know what I'm gonna say? I've thought about this a lot. It is ingrained in the value system of New Zealand for those things to be valued and not as much in the US for those specific things. But that doesn't mean it doesn't exist there. I think that who you are around heavily influences that as well in terms of how you think about that. Are you letting those people in that causes stress? You know, the healthcare system, it's hard because it's like you can afford it or you can't or you can go bankrupt just because you have an accident. Like that's very stressful when you don't have that here, you know, even none of it. My daughter had full knee surgery, like, you know, it was a walk out with a, thank you. No matter how to penny, zero. For me it was like, whoa. So like the benefit of being here is that your eyes open to a different way of doing something, you get a perspective, then you're able to draw conclusions from that. And then you, sometimes you change your value system and your beliefs because you've actually, because you can't, you can't, you can't read about that. You know, people, a lot of Americans read about socialized healthcare, you know, they think it's bad. Yeah, and we don't know. They haven't experienced it. Do you know what I mean? And so it's not perfect in either way, either way is not perfect. But it's just, I'm like, oh my goodness. It's just, you can't, yeah. So, yeah. I think it's based on a person too. Cause in the US, the things that were of value 30 years ago are starting not to be as much value. So family was huge value 30, 40 years ago. Your faith, your church community, big value. Sports, that wasn't even a thing. Women didn't even play sports, you know? And so now the value has switched to kid focus and sports and it has taken away a lot of community. But if you are a person who says, faith is important and family is important, you'll make it happen. Whether you're here, live in New Zealand, whatever. If you can set up your life however you want and even when I was there with my parents and was working there for a couple months and work life looks different than the world that they grew up in. And it was just a constant communication as like my mom interrupting me and I'm like, I'm working. And they think cause I'm home, they don't understand it exactly. You've seen a million videos and it's like, work looks different, expectations are different. If you set yourself up for that, there's plenty of like normal nine to five, you know, whatever kind of. But like there's an option these days with the digital economy for it to look different. And you have to put steps in place for that to happen. And it's great. And I've been helping people do that. And it's just getting easier and easier. AI actually is easier. Yeah. And like you were telling me because I've never been to New Zealand. I've never lived over there. But you used to live here and just the work, the amount of time off you guys get is amazing. And we talk about it here a lot, like a lot of other Americans talk about, we're all killing ourselves for a paycheck. And then by the time you get to retirement, you're gonna use all your money for cancer, a heart attack, a stroke, because you have stressed yourself out so bad, working and working and working and working to try to get to a point where you can take a break. Well, now we're old trying to take a break. And I'm not saying we, everybody should work hard. I mean, you just, we should work hard. But there's other ways that you can do that and also value time because time is not something you can bottle up and keep. And so as we're getting older, for me, time is becoming more important to me to have it off, have it doing something I want to be doing. And so I'm picking jobs based on that, not based on the dollar amount. Correct. And that's what people need to be looking at. They're like over-emphasizing this like their happiness equals money a lot of times. And like really like what actually would bring you happiness is to be able to go to your kids' sporting events to be able to be done at three o'clock every day. And what does that look like at $40,000, $50,000 a year? Then you're happy and you have time and your job doesn't suck because it's not taking up. You can do any job like in say 20 hours a week and feels like nothing, you know? So like if you just think about it like that. So like, yeah, so I have been working towards getting to the point where I could just work part time and run these things and just be able to build community and time or to just be, you know? Yeah. Like the goal needs to not be to make X amount of money. The goal needs to be for you to be living your best life whatever that looks like for you. And it's different for everybody and there's no judge around it, you know? So. I still think our best life will be having our own talk show and somebody needs to pick us up and make it happen. QVC. Wait, did I say that right? Yeah, QVC that you said that right. But that's the beauty of it is that like, I was just actually listening to, what is it? Ben J Lo's husband, why is Ben Affleck? Oh yeah, Affleck or whatever. Yeah, so like people are saying that celebrities aren't as good anymore. And he's like, no, like the whole world has decentralized celebrities. So people's celebrities are now their favorite YouTubers or their favorite podcasters. And it's not some random people that decide that these really good looking, talented people are the celebrities, you know? People have new celebrities. Like it's decentralized. Anybody for free can go out and create something and it's amazing. And you'll find your people just if you're willing to be you, being your authentic. This is something that I was talking about yesterday. Let me know what you think about this. I was thinking about the fact that somebody had mentioned that it's actually hard, whether you're on a podcast or social media or whatever you wanna do or just in life to be your authentic self. So that's what's important. That's what's working. That's what people are done with the fake, the acting that I'm rich and I'm amazing. Everybody's done with that. But the thing is, is to actually, when you actually do it, I create about 11 pieces of content a day. So I do it, I've been doing it for years. Yes, you have. You realize very quickly that you will be miserable if you're not your authentic self. But it's hard to figure out who your authentic self is. Because if you think about it, we've lived our whole life putting on a persona, whether we're at church or at school or with our parents, there's just, it's not like not us. It's just tweaked a little bit, right? Yeah, that's such a hard. Yes, and so we put ourselves out there on social media when it first started, we're putting out a persona of us and now it's changing and we've adapted to just be yourself, but who is that? Because I've never really been that. And I certainly haven't done it publicly, you know? Right. And so I'm talking to business owners and they're just like, well, what is it? And I'm just like, you actually have to just create. You actually have to make videos or write or whatever you're comfortable with. And then you start to find your voice and then you start to find what you actually think about things and what your opinions are about things. Cause we just live up here and we don't really know. We have to make a decision because we're not saying it here, you know? Yeah. And then you become more of your authentic self because you're like, oh, actually this is what I actually think about this and I'm okay with this and I don't care what you think, you know? Right. And again, age helps with that because I feel like when you're still kind of morphing into, okay, who am I? We have so many different chapters of life. It's like with your parents growing up, being on your own in college and trying to figure out what you're gonna do, picking your spouse, then you get married. What that looks like with that whole new role. Then you have kids and you're like, okay, I know what society wants me to be. I know what church has said, society, my husband, my parents, my kids. Now, when I break it all down, who did God make me? Who am I? What do I like? Tara's been, again, we've been friends for 20 plus years and she helps me think through. I mean, you guys gotta have people in your corner who know you really well and are not afraid to hurt your feelings, not because they're trying to hurt your feelings but because they love you so much and you can take that then. Because Tara loves me. And so when she says to me, get your head out of your rear, you're not doing that anymore. I go, oh, okay, that's right. That doesn't serve me anymore. That served me for a season. And now I'm growing up out of that season. I think sometimes when we go to a new season, we're so afraid of it because it's so unfamiliar. When you're 45 and now divorced after 20 plus years with three kids, my whole life, I had no idea who I was, what I'm supposed to do with my time. I mean, that just kind of happened for me living in a certain type of life. And then it changes. And in all of life, there's always a change. There's always change. If you can count on anything, it's change, you know? So it really, that's a really powerful thing you're saying that I hope people really hold on to. I mean, we love to be goofy and joke around and this is who we really are. But we also really want to stop wasting time being or doing something we weren't created to do or be because it's short-lived people. And there's only one of us. There's only one of me, one of her, one of you. And now we're in that season where hopefully our kids are grown and can manage themselves to a point. And now is our time. Now is our time. And so many people think like it's over the hill or it's like over and it's all downhill and it's not, you have like 30 to 50 more years of your life and you are more confident, you have more clarity, you have, and you just don't care what other people think. It's just great. Like I think that like now is the time. Even if you're 65, you know, some of the most famous people and authors or whatever started at 65, you know? Like it doesn't matter. And the digital economy just makes it so easy for entry. There's no barrier, it doesn't have to cost anything. Do you know what I mean? And you can just put your message out there and you know, people complain about social media and complain about that. And honestly, it's because of what they're choosing to like and to watch. Like there's plenty of good out there. And obviously bad stuff generally gets the attention but you know, it's just a reflection of our society and who we are. So like if you start putting good out into the world, there you go, you know? Like it's easy means to do that if you're comfortable with that. Nobody needs to, it's not required. It's just like, anyway. So just where the attention is, it's just where, it's just true. Like you can ignore it all you want. I talk to so many people my age that are completely ignoring. They don't even, you know, nothing. And that's fine. And you can completely ignore it but like the whole world is there. And you're missing learning that because the next realm of technology is going to be crazier. We're gonna like literally live in like little pods and you know, and have these virtual. And so you're not gonna understand it because you haven't done that first step, you know? So it'll be a little bit hard to adjust. Anyway, I don't like to ever be out of the loop. So, I know you're good about it. You helped me stay in it because I'm a little bit like, I have my own little show on Facebook, Tara's on the YouTube and everywhere else. And we're just, we're all kind of, you know, we're both trying to dabble and go, okay, what does this next thing look like? So that's awesome. Any, anything else they have for us? No, I didn't know where I got my coffee cup. I got more questions. Yeah, okay. Yeah, so I don't need to keep you forever. So, but yeah, so if you guys have questions or comments or thoughts on Gen X and weight loss and a night routine and, you know, like what your next steps are gonna be, let's talk about this. I'm starting to build a community, just starting to collect emails because I'm not sure what it's gonna look like. And I'll put the link in the description if you want to be a part of that. Just send an email and it's just, you know, it's called for women who dare. For women who dare to step out and be somebody different. And because the problem with that is that you need the community. You need encouragement. You need inspiration. And so that's what I'm thinking that that could be. But I don't know, we'll see, whatever you guys want. So yeah, that's an idea. But anyway, thank you for joining us today, Kristi. And good to see you guys. Well, I saw you. Good to see you New Zealand.