 Narcissists deny responsibility for their actions. They deny their duty to deal with something or of having control over someone. They dodge accountability or be in blame for something that they have done. They refuse to accept the choices that they have made. They refuse to own it. They refuse to accept the consequences of their choices. They cannot take responsibility for their choices or actions because it feels like they're being blamed for a fault or something they have done wrong. In their minds, they cannot do anything wrong. They don't take action. They only do something in response to a situation or something that someone else has done. So their behaviour must always be someone else's fault. When you point out a fault or mistake that they have made, they may even tell you that it's not their fault. They may even say that they are just reacting to you. They cannot accept that their reaction is a choice that they have made. They cannot accept that their choices are their responsibility. Some of them may not even fully understand that this is true, but those who do do not regard this to be of great significance. What is most important to the narcissist is that they are never to blame for anything. They don't want to take responsibility for their actions. It's too painful and uncomfortable for them to deal with because of the choices and actions that they choose to make. And they don't believe that there should be any consequences for them. In their minds, they believe they have suffered enough. Or they believe that they are special and do not deserve to experience any consequences. They don't think their choices or actions are unfair, but they believe that any consequences for what they have done would be unfair. Which is why if you get upset or dare to confront them on their behaviour, they will then attack you. Just for reacting to what they have done, or for pointing it out, they don't want to take responsibility for their choices or actions. They don't want to accept their faults or mistakes. They would rather deny the truth and reality of the situation. And act as though everything is fine. If this is difficult for them to do, they will just blame someone else. But they do not want to take responsibility for anything that they do. It's too painful and uncomfortable for them to accept. And they don't want to deal with the consequences of their choices or actions. Many people believe that narcissists do not apologise. But this is not true. They will often apologise if they believe that it will help them, or make the situation work out in their favour. But it will never be a genuine or sincere apology. They might say sorry, but then they will act as though they lacked awareness of what they said or did. Or they will pretend as though they don't even remember. But they are sure you must be right. In many cases, although they might say sorry, they will refuse to discuss or clearly define or identify their behaviour. In the few cases where they do choose to discuss their behaviour, there will always be a justification or excuse. There will always be reasons why it wasn't really their fault. Or they will see it as though you were just overreacting or being too sensitive. If you continue to question or confront them, they will only become more defensive. They will only become more anxious to challenge or avoid criticism. And they may even attack you, even though you may be a victim of their behaviour. They will do whatever it takes to dodge or deny responsibility for what they have done. They do not want to accept the consequences for their choices or actions. And that is why they will often apologise. They are trying to end the situation before it results in more things they don't like, or things they don't want to happen. They are not sorry for what they have done. They are not sorry for how it has affected you or anyone else. They only care about themselves and their own interests or needs. And that is the only reason why they will apologise. To further exploit their own interests or needs. They really have no concern for you or anyone else. They only care about themselves. You cannot make the narcissist responsible for their actions. Responsibility isn't just something you give to someone. It is something that the narcissist is supposed to take. Although the narcissist will take your time, energy, money, but anything else you have to offer. Responsibility is one thing that they are going to leave for you to deal with. You can try to hold them accountable for their actions, but they are not going to take it. They are going to feel like you are trying to blame them. When they feel as though they are being blamed, they experience shame. And they will do whatever it takes to dodge their shame. They will also feel as though you are responsible for their feelings. When you try to question or confront the narcissist, they will feel as though you are attacking them. They will feel that you are the cause of their shame, rather than it having anything to do with their choices or actions. When you question or confront the narcissist, it feels like life or death to them. They will instantly become defensive towards you because they feel like you are attacking them, just by pointing out what they have done. Many of them may even be incapable of overriding this way of reacting to you. It has become fixed or habitual. They have spent their entire lives trying to run from their problems, trying to dodge the shame that they feel for the things that they have done, and no matter how much you try to help them understand their responsibility and behaviour, it is not going to change anything. Because they don't want to do it for them to understand, they would have to care about your pain. And worst of all, they would have to accept that they made a fault or mistake. Narcissists are shame-based individuals who are doing everything they can to avoid reflecting on their shame. They are just trying to get through each day without being killed by their own self-hatred and shame for their actions. They have no capacity or interest to consider anything else whenever you point out their faults and mistakes. They just feel like you are trying to convince them that they are bad. All you can do in this situation is remove that access to you. You will never be able to get through to them. You will never be able to get them to understand your point of view. You will never be able to get them to care about things that they don't care about. You can spend years of your life trying to change them. But it will never work. It is not your responsibility to correct their behaviour. And it is not possible to make them have any care or concern for you. You cannot make them believe that they are responsible for their behaviour. You cannot stop them from hurting people. If that is what they choose to do you cannot stop other people from falling for their manipulation or lies. When you dedicate your life to punishing or exposing the narcissist you are only hurting yourself. You spend the rest of your life focused on them. Instead of living your own life which only prolongs your pain and misery and before you know it your entire life has passed you by. Thank you for watching. I hope this video resonates with you. Please like, comment, share and subscribe. Click the bell icon to receive notifications for my future videos. If you like to donate my PayPal links are in the video description. Coaching Inquiries is the name of me at Nikes Father Coaching at gmail.com Thank you for watching and I'll talk to you soon.