 Alright guys, what is going on? Welcome to another video, welcome to my brand new office, but it's not really brand new, I've just changed around the furniture a little bit. So basically I've been going back and forth, back and forth in my head as to where I want to take my body going forward as far as my body composition. So you guys know I've obviously started CrossFit and I'm loving it and when I'm killing myself at CrossFit, a thought goes through my head when I'm bulking officially and you know I'm killing myself at CrossFit I'm like fuck man, I wish I could be using these cardio sessions as a fat loss tool, as a weight loss tool rather than just conditioning my body so I'm fitter as my body weight goes up. So basically my head's been going back and forth, I've been deciding one morning I'll be like nah, I'm cutting today, one morning I will say no I'm bulking today and you know I'm back, I'm back to that, I'm back in this conundrum guys, I'm back in this issue and I've recently decided to go one way or the other so what's happened is recently at the CrossFit gym that I'm at they've decided to do a 28 day challenge and it's a 28 day fat loss challenge and there's a shitload of people doing it, I am doing it too so with that said from yesterday which was Saturday, today is Sunday, today is Sunday the 4th of June and as of, right I'll say this right now, as of tomorrow we're talking Monday the 5th of June I will be starting a 4-6 week mini cup, this is going to be similar to the one I did before I went to Thailand except I'm not going to Thailand so the results will stay and I won't fuck myself up through alcohol and basically guys my vision right now is to make it to day 365 of making gains in the best shape possible. Okay we're not just talking about making gains physically anymore guys, we're talking about making gains emotionally, mentally, physically and spiritually all coming into one so that on that final day I am in the best shape possible to move forward to whatever goals I've got going on so when I say mentally and emotionally recently you know I've gone through a little bit of heartbreak and it's never easy and you know I've gained support from a few people close to me and I want to thank you guys for sort of getting me out of that funk that I was in, yeah it's extremely easy to sort of get you know tunnel vision on one particular person and you know I've done that for a fair few years to be honest and in doing so I've cut myself off from other opportunities with relationships and with different girls that you know may have blossomed into something good but I always had this sort of thought in my head about this other person so I would never let myself get too close to someone else because basically I'd always have this hope of ending up with this this one person that I'd sort of been keen on for a long time and it takes it takes its time I mean time heals all that's that's all I can say it takes time you need people in your corner you know you need to value yourself one thing I wasn't doing guys was valuing myself you've got to have self-worth and you've got to realize what you're worth and I've done that recently and so I can happily say that mentally and emotionally I'm feeling really positive and I wasn't for probably last three weeks so alright so that's enough of that when I start when I start these making gains videos guys I basically just rattle off a day and hope that it's that but today we're actually gonna look at the calendar and work out exactly what day of making gains this is so we're at the 4th of June and believe it or not guys we started this series on August the 13th which was a Saturday so let's see 1 2 3 4 5 6 7 9 10 so that's 40 weeks 41 42 weeks so it was 42 weeks yesterday so 42 7s is 294 so right day 295 today guys boom so at day 295 currently let me take a drink of this first going forward where I want to be end of fucking 52 weeks this series I want to be physically in the best shape possible so we've started CrossFit I'm smashing that three four times a week I'm still going to the gym if I feel like I haven't worked any particular muscle group good enough in the CrossFit classes or the open gym sessions I will go to a commercial gym which I am still at the moment and and train with weights I'm probably doing that two to three times a week so I'm still going to the gym most days and obviously we're starting this mini cup as of tomorrow so I honestly think that'll probably continue all the way up until days 365 so I'm basically I'm gonna cut from here guys I'm cutting from today I'm cutting for the next eight weeks at the end of this series I want to be in the best physical shape possible I honestly think I'm gonna be in the best shape in my life because I won't I probably won't be quite as lean as what I have been in the past but as far as my muscle mass and my shape it's gonna be so much better and I can't wait for that as far as emotionally guys obviously I just told you what I've been going through emotionally I see myself at day 365 being you know focused on where I want to go won't have all these I won't have any regret in my head which I have been dealing with you know such a hard thing to deal with guys is regret when you can't change things I mean there's no they say there's no point crying over spilt milk but geez those tears do come I'll tell you that and anyways so that's mentally physically mentally emotionally let's talk about emotionally now the only thing that's going to help me emotionally become more stable become more of more of a man and move on is to quit weed it really is it's to quit smoking marijuana so emotionally this has been what has been holding me back it's you know I did I did make a video recently on the benefits of marijuana in bodybuilding and I stand by everything I said it does have benefits I do enjoy it but there also comes a time and a place where you know it's not suitable anymore use turns into abuse use turns into abuse and marijuana may be a herb and it may be natural and you know maybe medicinal but it's still a drug and it's still you know affecting your brain function it's it's continually heightening your dopamine levels and you know marijuana may not raise your dopamine levels as much as heroin or fucking crack or meth but it still raises it and what that means is that when you come off or you know on your come down as the feeling starts to wear off what goes up must come down guys yeah your dopamine levels may have only gone up by a certain amount but you know when you take that substance out of the system it's gonna not only come down to zero but it's gonna go below okay that causes a huge amount of mood instability and that is something I struggle with when I talk to the camera I'm in a good mood when I'm not talking to the camera who knows what mood I'm in guys honestly I'm just being real with you right now physically we're gonna be in good shape mentally I can tell I'm in fucking good shape right now emotionally that's the only thing I struggle with and it's all because I smoke too much weed so going forward guys that is gonna be another challenge of mine I hope that by the end of this series I can I can say that it doesn't sort of rule my life anymore because I can't have that happening and I can say that I don't think about this girl anymore because I can't have that happening and I can say that I'm not a fat cunt because I can't have that happening so three things moving forward can't wait we're at day 295 I'm gonna drink my coffee and actually head down to CrossFit believe it or not because it's been awesome really has I've been loving it and that's it so once again guys all I did this morning was know that I need to talk to the camera and I sat down and I put the camera in front of me and anyone that wants to make a YouTube channel a few people have talked to me recently about making YouTube channels and what to you know what to focus on how to improve you know any tips one tip guys one tip be yourself be yourself how can anyone hate on you for being yourself they don't like you they can fuck off if they like you they'll start giving you support and it's an amazing feeling when you can get support from an online community like this and it's a community that I've built over the last few years and it's just it's fucking cool man really is the power of social media and and not only that guys I feel like I've got a huge amount of my chest right now I really do and you know before I felt like I had a huge amount on my chest and now I've got it off and I feel really good actually talked my way through my problems to you guys I now know what I need to do what I'm looking forward to and that's it so until next time have a great day won't you I'll try and have a great day I hope you like my top I thought I'd put something on that's a little bit fresh and bright this is actually a golden aesthetics top so I'm I've never worn it I've had it for about six months but I thought it's way too much to even wear anywhere and actually I was a bit it's I must have lost a little bit of weight because it was fucking tight before and insane I probably have I'm probably I'm probably sitting at about 102 kgs so let's see where we go from here so basically the way I see it as of tomorrow it's gonna be Monday I'm gonna start tracking my macros on my fitness power 2,500 calories once again and we're just gonna see what happens I think I'm gonna shape up pretty well I think my metabolism is running pretty good at the moment so that's it that's the plan I can't wait you guys will see the results as per usual tomorrow is the first day I might vlog it who knows if not I'll see you guys in the next one peace