 The narcissist will do this after discarding you The narcissist will discard you They will cut you off as though your garbage As though you're not worth anything But then after some time they will return to you again They will monitor you They will observe you and check your progress over a period of time Because they know that they took a risky action in the hope of a desired result They know they left things to chance So now they want to see if they made the right decision Because they want to feel good about the decision that they have made They want to feel like they did the right thing They don't want to feel like they made the wrong move So they have to keep checking in on you to see how you're doing To see if you're progressing without them Because when a person moves on they're meant to be moving on to something better You're not meant to end up in a worse situation You should be putting yourself in a better position In something that's more beneficial for you So that you don't have regrets about the decision that you have made But narcissists have very poor judgement and decision making They often make bad decisions So they will monitor you They will continue to observe what you're doing after they've left you They will be watching you from afar Even if they're not directly communicating with you Because they're worried that what they're dealing with might fail So they have to keep you on the shelf Just in case they later decide to return to you Because then they're already aware of certain information about you So they will already know what type of character you would like to see from them By studying what types of things you're interested in so that they can play the role But they never change They will tell you that they've changed They will tell you they're a better person But they never do the work to change Instead they will come back after they've spent hours studying you So that they can learn what not to do to remain undetected when they're dealing with you Because they don't want you to know that they're exactly the same as they were before They will just keep that hidden from you But the truth is that they are very envious that you're living your life and you're having a good time You're doing fun and exciting things without them And they can't stand it They hate to see that But they can't help themselves Because when they discarded you they thought you were garbage Which is why they didn't put in any effort with you It wasn't worth it for them So they left you in a difficult situation without any help But they will continue to check in on your weight of life Because they're confused about how they weren't capable of attracting and holding your interest Or how they couldn't get you to beg them to come back Because when they discard you that's all they're wanting you to do They've had years of practice that perfected their craft of enablation They've done this to many people before you And other people may have acted differently They may have begged for the narcissist's attention They may have been down on their knees So they want to know what's so different about you Why are you not susceptible? Why are you not under their spell? And they will moan at you to try to prove to themselves that it's you and not them They have to try to devalue you Because otherwise their only option is to try to return to you Which is not easy because it requires a lot of work from them A lot of self-control A lot of unemotional dispassionate and moderate behaviour To where they have to pretend like they don't really want you They don't really want to come back to you Because they can't accept that they messed up Well that they should have to make things right But at the same time they're forced to accept that they don't have any other choice Because they want to be in a place or situation that is very active and exciting They want fun They want enjoyment, amusement and lighthearted pleasure They're thrill seekers, adrenaline junkies And they're constantly looking for their next hit They're constantly looking for new supply And they often end up in dead-end situations With people who just don't know what to do with them So then they have this epiphany They realise that it hits different with you And then they want to come back to you After they overlooked and underestimated you They regarded you as less capable than you really are They assumed that you were in a difficult situation As though things were getting bad for you But then they started to interact with other people They established new connections And that didn't go right for them They weren't satisfied so then they considered and assessed you again in a new light with different factors Because they realised that they were missing out on something And what they were missing out on is fun They were missing out on enjoyment and playfulness And that's what they want They want to be a part of that They want to be a part of anything that makes them feel good Anything that makes them feel happy So they will come back Often after they've already been watching you for months And they've seen that you've been having fun You've been having a good time without them You've developed new interests Maybe you're wearing new clothes Or you've styled your hair differently You're experimenting with new things And it feels new to them It looks fun, interesting and exciting So they will pretend to be about that as well They will act like they're on the same page They will build a character And try to reflect your own individual personality back to you Because they believe that you will be more accepted of it They believe that it will be more appealing to your personal tastes Because there has to be a common interest or passion Otherwise it wouldn't make any sense They would have no business dealing with you Unless they're just trying to groom you and train you to meet their needs Which is exactly what they're trying to do But they have to find a way to get in first And they will do that by developing this fake common interest Which they don't really care about But it's all so that they can tear you to pieces Because they never change They've just been watching and studying you the entire time And it's been making them sick It's been making them very angry Because you've been having a good time without them Like they were nothing to you So now they want to show you up They want to outperform or outclass you They want to teach you a lesson They want to show you that you were wrong about them But only if they're capable Because many of them don't even have the means to do that But they're still thinking about you They're focusing all of their energy and attention on you And it has a powerful and lasted effect It pulls you in mentally And it can make you want to be a part of something That doesn't even exist Something that they've just created in their minds And they've exchanged these ideas with you energetically But it has no basis in reality Because the reality is that they just can't leave you alone But it doesn't mean that they have anything of value to bring to you It just means that they can't get you off their minds Even though you may have moved on You accepted that they weren't wanting to deal with you And it may have been unpleasant for you But you kept going So you moved on But they haven't moved on Because they're still thinking about it It's still playing on their minds And the worst part about it Is when you try to cut them off and go to contact Because they still haven't processed it They still haven't resolved these feelings in their minds So it will get to them And they will do anything to get back to you They will invent something in order to deceive you But your silence gives you power It protects you from this person who means you know well Because then you have nothing to prove to them When they're stalking you the last thing they want you to do is to resist them The whole purpose of it is to get you to attach to them To keep them on your minds Which is why they're constantly present They're always there Which is why they always have to have something that gives them that foot in the door It's the first step that gives them an entry into your life and into your mind It's used as a way of getting them what they want Because otherwise you just forget about them and move on They wouldn't even cross your mind and they know that So they've got to have something that keeps you stuck thinking on them Something that's constantly playing on your mind And they may have acted as though you weren't good enough And all they wanted is for you to be better But they already know that they're the one thing standing in your way They know that they're preventing you from reaching your full potential Because in fact the last thing they want is for you to heal and be better That's the last thing they want to see Because then that would mean you don't need them And they want you to need them Even though they have no intentions of ever giving you what you need Which is why they're always around you It's why they always want to be on your mind Because they already know that it's going to make it more difficult for you to heal It's going to make it more difficult for you to move on And that's the whole purpose of it It's designed to keep you thinking about them To keep you stuck in the past so that you can't move on Because the reality is that they can't move on They're stuck in the past, they can't heal or change or be better And the last thing they want to see is you leaving them behind They don't want to be stuck in the past of their own Where they're constantly thinking about you And you've moved on without them They have this crabs in the bucket mentality Where they will do everything in their power to destroy the ambitions of those who wish to improve themselves Because they can't bear to themselves And they don't want to see you moving on and doing better without them Because that affects how they feel about themselves It makes them feel like they're stupid and they're wrong They're stuck in the past and they can't move on So they need you to worry They need you to care So that they can filter their emotions through with you Because they can't process them on their own They need a vessel They need someone to carry their emotions But the moment you begin to feel unbothered And you become indifferent to their criticism and negative comments And you cut them off But you realise that they have nothing to offer you They have nothing of value to bring to your life That is when they will lose their significance and importance They will lose their quality of being worthy of your attention Because by that point they're known as irrelevant But the last thing they want is to not have any relevance to you They need to feel like they're closely connected or appropriate Otherwise they're forced to accept that they have no business dealing with you They're forced to accept that they're doing something they should not be doing And that's the last thing they want Because they still have their feelings And they see their feelings as facts So they need their feelings to be relevant Which is why they have to make you feel some type of way So that they can get a hold on you and make themselves relevant Because they feel like they're getting something from you And they feel like they're still getting something of value Which is why they will try to arouse your curiosity and interest Even though they've already burned the bridge And there's no way you're going to go back to trusting them again Although they may not always realise that because of their arrogance and entitlement They only care about themselves and what they're trying to get from you You just need to cut them off Because they're never going to be anything good for you And you should know that from the first time you dealt with them The second time is always worse It never gets better First impressions are everything Nothing can replace that moment When you first encounter another person and form a mental image of them Which is why they're really just wasting their time They're delusional Which is why they will continue to stalk you Especially on social media And they will go to great lengths just to get your attention But it will never work Because they're trying to achieve the impossible They're trying to replace that first impression That initial interaction you had with them Which is what's most powerful It's what influences a person the most and determines the course of events And what they're really seeking is power But they're seeking something they're never going to possess Because they already shot themselves in the foot They already exposed themselves They already did things that caused problems for you So they will never get that They will never hold that level of power and influence over you They will never be able to attract and fascinate you in that sort of way They already blew it They already failed to take advantage of that opportunity But they will still keep trying And instead of keeping it natural And trying to recreate that feeling of intense excitement They will resort to power play Where they will have to stay informed enough to date They will have to possess special knowledge and power They will have to stay two steps ahead of you They will have to cleverly anticipate what you will do or think But it eats away at them It troubles them constantly Because that's not what they really want And they know that's not what you want But they have to resort to these silly games So that they can have a peep at what you're doing Because although they may act like robots Who are all serious and trying to control you Deep down they're just like everyone else They want to have a good time too They want to be in on the action But once they've exposed themselves for who they are They know they really haven't got a chance So they have to resort to stories They have to accept that it's all that they can do Even though they know it hits different They know that it isn't real Because you no longer want them And they already know you don't want them No one wants someone standing on their shoulders all the time And they know that no one wants to be controlled They know they don't deserve you after what they've done to you So they have to resort to stalking you They have to accept that it's all they can do But at some point you need to make sure they understand something that you've never said directly You need to make sure they get the hint Because hypothetically speaking Even if you played along with it You would see the same issues coming up again and again You would see that they can't assimilate Because they already have their own ideas in their head about who you're supposed to be So their dynamic will always change Because they're fake They're just wearing a mask And that mask is always going to be there They're always going to be wearing it They're always going to be concealing something from your view Because the reality is that they can only pretend to amuse you They can't generate it from within authentically They can't entertain you They're not wired that way So as I've always said The best you will ever get from a narcissist is an illusion They will only ever be playing a role And it will only ever be a shared fantasy where you'll have to use your imagination to fill in the gaps The reality is That it's only ever going to be something that you've created on your own So don't entertain any unusual new messages or frame requests Because they operate in an impressively smooth and efficient way They've had a lot of practice So they know how to manipulate people They know how to make you think they're about something They know how to come across as something attractive or interesting As something that you should want As though they're not responsible for or directly involved in an event Get suffering its consequences But deep down they will always have this cunning and deceitful nature They will always reveal their skills in achieving their ends By misrepresentation and evasion They will make you believe that on the same page To relieve your suspicions But they're not thinking how you think And they're not feeling what you feel They have an inability to understand and share your feelings All they can do is watch and study you They can't connect to attach They can only hide and then suddenly reappear And although it may sound sick, weird and creepy It's exactly what they do Thank you for watching If you found this video helpful Please give it a thumbs up Share your thoughts in the comment section Hit the subscribe button to receive the notifications If you would like to support the channel You can donate at payable.me slash Narc Survivor You can book a one on one with me on my website It's narcsurvivor.co.uk Thank you for watching and I'll talk to you soon