 J-E-L-L-O! The Jell-O program starring Jack Benny with Mary Livingston, Phil Harris, Dennis Dane, and yours truly, Don Wilson. The orchestra opens a program with Old Johnny. This morning I was looking over the book reviews of the Sunday paper and reading the lists of bestsellers, and that just happened to give me an idea. I'd like to recommend to you a grand bestseller in the field of desserts, a dessert that's not only currently popular, but has been on the bestseller list for years and years. The author is General Foods, and the name is Jell-O, and ladies and gentlemen, that's a mighty important thing, because it's a trademark. It's the property of General Foods. And it tells you here is the real thing, the one and only Jell-O. If you hear any other gelatin dessert called Jell-O, you'll know that's incorrect, for there is no other. So when you buy, don't accept any substitutes. It's made for Jell-O by name, and you can be sure every time of getting your favorite dessert. You can be sure of enjoying that delicious, extra-rich flavor, so full-bodied and tempting as inviting as a fresh ripe fruit. Look for those big red letters on the box. They spell Jell-O, your password to pleasure. That was Old Johnny, played by Phil Harrison, his orchestra. And now, ladies and gentlemen, oh, Jack, Jack. Yes, Don? Is your tooth still bothering you? It's a little, Don, but it'll be all right. Go ahead. And now, ladies and gentlemen, you ought to see a deadest, Jack. A toothache can be very annoying. I know, Don, but I'm all right. Go ahead and introduce it. And now, ladies and gentlemen, but Jack, it must hurt. Don't you feel any jumping pains? Only when you mention it. Now, please, go ahead and introduce me. All right, Jack. Good. And now, ladies and gentlemen, without further ado, we bring you a man who, despite a severe toothache, feels that the show must go on. A brave little soldier, that grand old trooper, Jack Benny. Thank you. Thank you. Oh, that tooth. Uh, Jell-O again, this is Jack Benny talking through a murderous molar. Well, Don, here it is Sunday again. We're back on the old merry-go-round. Time sure flies, doesn't it? Oh, it certainly does. You know, Jack, it doesn't seem possible that we've been on the air six times already this season. No, it doesn't. No kidding, fellas. Have we been on the air six weeks? Yes, Phil. And they sure roll around fast, don't they? Yeah, it seems like I hardly get one paycheck till I have to start battling for the next one. Oh, you do. Well, listen, Phil, if I were you, I'd take my paychecks any way I could get them. Yeah? Yeah. And I wouldn't complain about your job. You're very lucky. You know, in musical circles, they refer to you as Horseshoe Harris. And that goes for your boys, too, those 17-rabbit speed. So, let the well enough alone. Now, what was I talking about, Don? You were complaining about your tooth. I was not. I was talking about how the weeks fly by. You know, Don, sometimes it amazes me how I can prepare all the ideas that go into this program in seven days. It's really quite a grind. I can appreciate that, Jack. It must be pretty tough. Oh, it is, Don. Tiz. I don't know what you're squawking about. Look at all the band numbers. I gotta rehearse and get ready. It's no sense. Believe me. Phil, you mean to tell me you actually prepare your numbers ahead of time? Those voodoo vultures? Sure, we gotta have everything right up to snuff. We gotta live up to our slogan, you know. Your slogan? Oh, you've got a slogan now. Sure. Listen to this. If it's a Harris selection, it's sheer perfection. Well, well, say that's very good. I got another one we use on the road. Get this. If it's a Harris number, you will never slumber. I agree with you there. And Phil, if you can stand one more slogan, it goes like this. If it's a Harris melody, it's sure to smell a day. And I don't mean Christmas night. Now, where was I? What were we talking about, Don? You were complaining about your tooth. I was not. You know, Don, there are times. Oh, hello, Mary. Hello, Jack. Say, what's the matter with your face? My face? Yeah, one cheek isn't sunk in anymore. Oh, that's my tooth. My left cheek is swollen a little. A little? It's not a squirrel. It's all set for a long winter. Oh, I do. My goodness, Jack. That tooth has been bothering you all week. Why don't you have it pulled out? Oh, the pain will go away. Say, fellas. I never saw anybody so scared of a dentist. I'm not scared of a dentist. That tooth is loose. It will probably fall out by itself. You mean like that thin stuff on top of your head? I mean, don't worry about me. I'll get this tooth fixed my own way. Say, Jackson. What? One of my piano players don't like you. He'll be glad to knock it out. Oh, you mean that little squirt sitting over there? No, the other one. Oh. Oh, hello, butch. I didn't see it. Now, go sit down. He won't hit you, Jack, with those glasses on. She's right, Jack. It's against the law to hit anybody that's wearing glasses. Listen, Don. I said that to a big guy one day, and he took my glasses off, punched me in the nose, and put him back on again. So don't tell anyone. I told him to put his glasses on, but he said he's not going to need it anymore. Don't tell anybody. I'll tell you, don't worry about me. I'll get this tooth fixed my own way. Say, Jackson. What? One of my piano players don't like you. He'll be glad to knock it out. Punch me in the nose and put him back on again So don't tell me what were you doing in the meantime Jack was explaining the law to him Yes, he'll know better next time Say Phil how about playing a number? My tooth is acting up again. I want to put a couple of drops in it Okay, what kind of toothache drops are you using Jack? I don't know. It's something Rochester makes I think it's chloroform and white mule It does the trick though go ahead Phil play something all right Jackson get ready boys and remember folks If it's a Harris selection, it's sheer perfection. Yeah Hey, what's that for? Oh, you weren't here Mary, but Phil has suddenly become slogan conscious I'll give her that other one Phil. Well, here's one. You haven't even heard yet when smiling Harris plays a tune Every month in the year is June How's that Mary? Wow, that's corn that isn't even ripe yet That's a good one say Jack what if vaudeville ever comes back. I got a swell slogan for you Never mind. What is it Mary when Betty plays on his violin you can shoot him down and it ain't no sin Mary we weren't talking about my violin so that laugh doesn't count Let's forget our poetry contest and get along with the show play something Phil. Oh, wait a minute. Jack You've all had your little poetry. How about giving me a chance? Okay, Don Let's hear your contribution said he with a look of innocence in his baby blue eyes Take it down. All right, but I want you to help me Jack now you start me off with hello, Joe Okay. Hello, Joe. What do you know? I just got back from the grocery store Did you buy a box of you know what yes, sirie, that's what I got what's in this box It's so delish. I bet you wish you had a dish can this be jello that you mean yuck yuck yuck. I'm Madam Queen Mary you spoiled the whole thing that last line didn't make sense. All right, send me to Siberia It's nothing to get funny about hey genius what play something that guy answers to anything if you just put a hay in front of Stop it's wonderful played by Phil Harris who can now tear up his slogans a Harris selection is sheer perfection. Oh, maharajah And now folks wait a minute Jack are you insinuating that number was in harmonious What's that in harmonious mediocre lacking in finesse and euphony? Why Phil? Well, that's today's work. Good night all Rosalind come back here What a guy he learns four big words and he's all in And now folks before we say where's Dennis? I saw him downstairs with his mother just for the broadcast I did too an old Jack is Mrs. Day mad at you mad at me why we got to be very good friends at my Halloween party Well, she was home last Sunday listening to our program and she heard you call her a pest I didn't call her a pest. I said she needed a rest. Well, she got it. So watch out Oh Mary Mrs. Day is much too broad-minded to be upset about a little joke and now folks However, Mary, I wouldn't mention anything about it when she comes in, you know, yeah, I know, you know how it is Yeah, I know how to yeah, and now folks and now folks Mary. Let me alone And now folks following our success last week with our version of the women tonight we are going to oh boy Wasn't I marvelous in that play? What didn't I give a terrific performance? Yes, Phil you were sensational. Would you consider a thousand dollar raise in salary? I feel guilty having you at these prices That's a deal shake get away or I'll break your arm Terrific performance anyway folks as I was saying following our success last week with the women Tonight we are going to offer. Oh, look who's coming. Well. Hello Dennis. Hello, Mr. Benny and your mother's with you Well, well, this is nice a good evening. This is Dave. How do you do? Well, you're looking very good. Appreciate thanks, and you will please refer to me as Mrs. Day Well, it is now 20 degrees cooler inside Mary well Dennis, I'm glad you're here, and I know you have a lovely song prepared for us tonight Are you ready? Yes, I am say mr.. Benny. What's the matter with your jaw? Did someone hit you no Dennis? I have a bad toothache, you know Mrs. Day it hurts like the dick and it's really a miracle that I can be funny tonight You were very funny last week Very funny. Oh, did you enjoy the show? Yes, especially the part where you called me a pest It was such a brilliant remark by Mrs. Day. I called you a pet. Yes, you did on the radio Yes on the radio on my program. It wasn't Duke Ginsburg and his happy Hawaiian Very quiet Now look Mrs. Day it may have sounded like I called you a pest But this darned tooth of mine slurs my words than bother me all week your tooth Yes, you can see for yourself. Look It's the rug one right here the one on the urn sir. Oh, that does look pretty bad. Yeah, it hurts like the dickens Hey Jack, let me hear you say your name work. Let me hear you say your name jerk Rennie. That's what I thought Mary I've got a toothache. I prefer a little sympathy to ridicule. Well, I'm for heaven's sake. Stop complaining to go to a dentist I'm not going to a dentist. What's the matter? You afraid? No, I'm not afraid. Well, there's only one other reason So let's take up a collection Well, I won't be necessary the first time I ever had trouble with a tooth I haven't been to a dentist since I was 10 years old. Don't tell me you made those uppers yourself Now I didn't make those uppers my town Jack I don't want to be an alarmist But I think you ought to do something about that tooth that might lead to serious consequences. Well, gee it does hurt But I don't know who to go to I know a good dentist Jack and he's just two blocks from here Come on, let's go. Oh, don't pull go ahead Jack. We'll take care of the program. Sure. I got some swell jokes And I'm dying to tell him. No, I know your jokes Phil a waiter. Have you got frogs legs? No, I always walk this way That's nice smart material Come on, Mary. Let's go. Okay. Well so long fellas All right, Dennis you can go ahead with your song now. What's it going to be? I'm gonna sing a very popular number called a man in his dream from my camera about pictures a star Daring pink cross be I got that in Dennis don't be such a ham now sing oyster my imagination Sometimes it borders on fantasy And sometimes I find visions flashed my mind Close Reality I Hidden lay and here and there a whispered word Now I'm gonna let it go to some other time. You'll do nothing of a kind. I'd rather wait He's as swell Dennis Jack. It's not very modest. Is it? Well, let's go in. Hey, he's got a nice office, hasn't he? Yeah, how do you do sir? How do you do? I'd like to see dr. Nelson. Why yes, well, you know what you're doing Mrs. Is that a drill? Yes, the doctor is working out a patient some say Mary. Are you are you sure this Dennis is all right? Of course, he's all right. Do I look worried? No, but then I'm the one with the toothache I'm not worried Mary, but I just want to make sure I hate this waiting. Come on Mary Yeah, come painless. What was that six o'clock? I'm getting out of here That'll be all for today. Mrs. Stewart. When will I see you again? You should live so long Well young man, are you waiting to see me? Yes, but I your name, please Benny. I'm Jack Benny the actor Sorry, we don't give theatrical rates. Well, I didn't mean it that way I expect to pay the same price as anybody else eventually Who that tooth throbbing again step right this way, please follow me. Can I come in too? Yes, Mary You stick right with me. Oh nurse sterilize my mandibular injector and have the gut a perch are ready Yes, doctor now step into this chair mr. Benny, and I'll strap you in Strap me in. Yes. We don't want you squirming around. Oh, would you like a manicure? No, thanks I just dropped in to have my toothpick. Oh, yes the tooth now first. We must determine which one it is just a moment Is it this one? No, this one No, is it this one Yeah The one doctor heard something awful. We'll take care of that This is a large cavity, and I'll have to fill it right away. Do you want gold or silver? I want cement cement is no good. Mr. Benny. It wears out. Listen doctor I've seen sidewalks around here for years, and they're holding up all right Now go ahead and fill it very well, I'll use cement and then we'll all put our footprints in it I'm not brown man's Chinese Furthermore, I don't want to bother filling this tooth. I want to pull all right, then perhaps I ought to give you an anesthetic Perhaps nothing knock me out perhaps yet very well. We'll give you gas now take it easy Mr. Benny relax and breathe deeply. What are you gonna do nurse place the mask over his nose? Yes, doctor now inhale slowly, and you'll soon be in dream land No, wait a minute doctor. Wait a minute now just relax. Bye. Bye, mr. Benny Mary Mary, where are you here? I am Jack Mary keep your eye on my money while I'm under the Well, I'm under the anesthetic. Okay, which stock is it in the right one Hey doctor, I don't think I want to send me those clamps. So you are doctor. I don't think and that's a live ejector Yes, doctor. I don't think I Don't think I live and brush my teeth with Ipana if it isn't Benny and he's sleeping sounder than his audience on Sunday night Oh nurse nurse. Yes, dr. Allen hand me that chisel. I'm going to do this the hard way here. You are dr. Allen Thank you, Mrs. Day. This is day Fred Allen Where am I? The Jell-O program starring Phil Harris with Mary Livingston, Mahatma Gandhi George Bernard Shaw and yours truly Lady Godiva This is Jack Benny talking now hold on there Benny. It's town hall tonight. What? Wait a minute. That's not Portland. That's Mary Livingston. Shut up Carmichael Carmichael Who's Carmichael? Oh my goodness. Look at this white fur all over me Jell-O program starring Phil Harrison This orchestra the orchestra opens a program with Scheherazade by Rimsky-Korsakov. That's a lie They'll never make it. Let me let me out of this chair now here. Hold still Carmichael. I'm not Carmichael I'm Jack Benny Mrs. Day hand me that crowbar. I'm not getting anywhere with this chisel. Oh crowbar. Let me out of here What am I doing in this cage? Who's that coming torquey? Carmichael your day has come What I've been waiting a long time for this Rochester Rochester. What are you doing with that razor? Ain't no use backing away Carmichael winners coming and Papa needs a fur coat Look Rochester. I'm not Carmichael. This is me your boss. Mr. Benny. Mr. Benny. Yes, put down that razor I'll give you a new tuxedo. I'll give you anything you want. I'll give you a raisin salary. Uh-huh. You ain't mr. Benny Rochester Carmichael you're about to become a fond memory Rochester. Let go of me. Ain't no use scratching pull in those long claws These aren't claws Rochester. These are my fingernails. Would you like a manicure mr. Benny? No, I'm just here to get my tooth pulled Rochester get away from me. What are you going to do Carmichael? I'm going to carve you up and have you for a Thanksgiving dinner Rochester. You don't even know when Thanksgiving is who does Rochester for the last time get away from it. Hi you Rochester. Look, there's Phil Harris. He'll tell you who I am Hello, Philzy. Hi you Carmichael. There's a fish for you Look at me. I'm not Carmichael. I'm Jack your pal Jack Benny the actor. I'm sorry. We don't give theatrical rate Doctor doctor hand me that hacksaw mrs. Day. We're coming along fine. Here you are doctor. Thank you mrs. Day I'm not mrs. Day. I'm Carmichael. You are not. I'm Carmichael I mean, I'm jack Benny Mary what are you laughing at? How can I laugh? I'm a poached egg. You're talking about where are you? Oh my tooth. Oh dr. Allen, you'll never get the tooth out that way. You'll have to use dynamite Oh dynamite is so messy mrs. Day hand me my machine gun machine gun. No, no Now hold still Benny. I want to make a nice clean job of this. Please Fred. Please you can't do this to me I'm a polar bear. Don't you love animals? Don't Fred All over mr. Benny that didn't hurt now did it hurt Where's Fred Allen? Where's Harris? Where did I get my hands on that rocket? I'll calm down mr. Benny. You were just dreaming Dreaming Oh, yes, you gave me gas didn't I certainly did and here's your tooth. It's a beauty, isn't it? My tooth. Yes, you mind if I keep it. I'm an elk, you know Oh, that's perfectly all right. Well, I feel much better now. How much do I owe you doctor? That'll be 35 dollars 35 dollars There he goes again folks Repeated by popular request in the language of radio and the theater that means a hit And it means a hit too when applied to some tasty dish that must be served again and again Because of the whole family's enthusiasm for it Such a dish ladies and gentlemen is pineapple strawberry whip an exciting new jello dessert For one thing it's as easy as can be to make Simply dissolve one package of fragrant strawberry jello in a pint of hot water Then chill until cold and syrupy Next place it in a bowl of cracked ice or ice water and whip with a rotary egg beater until it becomes light and fluffy And finally just before molding it fold in one cup of canned crushed pineapple It's downright thrilling the way those golden tidbits of juicy pineapple Compliment the rich ruby goodness of strawberry jello And you can bet that everybody will want this colorful striking dessert repeated by popular requests many times So ask your grocer tomorrow for some strawberry jello And tomorrow night when the family gather around the dinner table Surprise them with a glorious bowl of jello's new pineapple strawberry whip The last number of the sixth program of the new jello series And we will be with you again next sunday night at the same time Before we say good night I would like to remind you of the annual red cross roll call Every citizen should join because your memberships are the sole support of the regular red cross program Of fighting the suffering caused by disease accident and disaster So may I urge you to join the red cross through your local red cross chapter? Good night folks J.E.L.L.L. Here's news every tuesday night the aldrich family is on the air starring esra stone as henry aldrich that lovable hard luck kid consult your local newspaper or radio guide from thiamin stations and be sure to tune in on the aldrich family Next tuesday night. This is the national broadcast in guppah