 When people think of abuse, they often equate it to physical violence, but that isn't where abuse starts or ends. Abuse can be physical, mental, or emotional, and everything in between. It is important to understand what constitutes as abuse, and what you can do about it if you come to the realization that you are being abused. What follows is a list of ten red flags you might run into if you are in an abusive relationship. This list is not meant to be the only red flags of abuse, and if you feel that you are being abused, please seek out help. There will be a short list of resources in the description for this video. Number one, controlling behavior. In many abusive relationships, the abuser will want to control every aspect of their victim's life. They might want to know who their victim is talking to, who they are planning to meet up with, or where they are going. This can even flow into them controlling what their victim wears, how their makeup looks, or how they carry themselves. Number two, humiliates you. This behavior is often done in front of other people, perhaps his or her friends, and is used as a way to keep their victim down. The abuser's goal is to make them feel weak and small so that the victim doesn't stand up for themselves. Number three, guilt trips. This is a method employed by abusers when they want to get their way. They might say something like, if you loved me, you would or wouldn't do this, or I thought this meant something to you, but apparently I was wrong. The hope is that the victim will feel bad for letting their abuser down and just give in to whatever it is they want. Number four, forces you to take responsibility for their feelings. The abuser will use this tactic as a form of manipulation. They may say, you make me angry, or you've done this, you've done that, as a way to make their victim feel responsible for anything bad. This is meant to push that victim to work on making the abuser happy at all times. The abuser wants to keep their victim in line and making them feel like it's all their fault helps the abuser control their victim's actions. Number five, ultimatums. With ultimatums, the abuser is trying to get what they want by force without laying hands on their victim. With an ultimatum, the abuser might hold something over their victim's head, perhaps a child or even their home, in an attempt to gain absolute control over the situation. The abuser might say something like, if you go out with your friends, I'll take away your credit cards, or if you leave me, I'll kill myself. Number six, physical violence. If the abuser can't get their way with words, they can and will resort to violence. This can start off as small things like holding their victim's arms during an argument and lead up to completely beating their victim or even killing them. Hitting, choking, tripping, pushing, or throwing things are all forms of physical violence in a relationship. Number seven, a bad temper. The abuser might have a short fuse or just blow up over something that doesn't look like a big deal to anyone else. This isn't just a symptom of having anger issues. It is also yet another form of manipulation. The goal of this is to scare the victim into being subservient and obedient by doing anything they can to stop their abuser from getting angry. Number eight, forces you to do things you don't want to do. This can mean anything from making you go to the movies when you'd rather stay home to making you do something physically that you don't want to do. It is another way for the abuser to gain control over their victim. Some might even find pleasure in watching their victim feel uncomfortable. Number nine, constantly checks up on you. An abuser might employ this as a way of keeping their victim in line. They may demand that their victim text them at certain intervals while they are out and can even request that the victim send specific pictures, like them holding up a peace sign or a selfie with the friend they said they were with. Number ten, picking a fight. An abuser might do this to test your limits. They will want to know how far they can take a fight and see what all you might be willing to apologize for. They won't take responsibility for anything and will instead make you feel as if it was all your fault. Once the fight is over, they may forgive you right away, or they may keep up a cold facade to see what you might do to win back their favor. If you feel like you might be in an abusive relationship, please seek help. If you are actively being abused, call 911 as soon as you can and report it. There are also many options based on where you live as well. There are some links in the description for this video. So what are your thoughts? Be sure to comment below if you want to see more content like this and please subscribe to see more videos from Psych2Go. Thanks for watching.