 We're talking to Barry Crimmins. How are you? I'm great David. It was great to hear you wanted to do your podcast with me today. I get some requests for pot. I got a message today from a guy who said, I'm a 25 year old who has a podcast and I'm thinking how old you have to be before you stop telling people, I mean it's cute if a nine year old writes you you know but I was like you're fucking 25 you know like Jesus Christ you know what are we going to talk about pokeman you know like what the fuck you know seriously I'm a god I'm a 25 year old with a podcast really you're still coming your age Jesus Christ what is I mean I hope it's not somebody you know with some sort of challenge something I'm still guilty about that but otherwise it's like I am a 25 year old really you're 24 like one of I can you remember telling people you were 25 when you're I was just acting like I was an adult at that point trying to not succeeding yeah I told people I was 25 when I was in my 40s hey what were you doing when you were 25 I was uh I was uh doing uh under the stone at Skinny Alice when Gold played in uh Kenny and when the wild and all those guys showed up what was under the stone that was the my my weekly show in my hometown at Skinny Alice New York I was home for a while and and uh we did uh you know seven or eight months there and then started doing some other stuff around the central New York area and then I uh ended up in Boston right after that so you grew up in upstate New York correct yes I can speak the uh native defeated tone of upstate New York our 93 inches of snow last year just uh my house like I opened the door again and worked on my alcoholism yeah Jesus Christ there David Skinny Alice is an Indian word that means beautiful lake surrounded by fascists yes and I'm from that and now it's all dressed up to look like itself as my friend Hoxford says my friend Hoxford says you can get anything your horse needs except food and we have like 24 hour a day Christmas tree ships it's just unbelievable how many uh places there are to get Christmas ornaments when you were growing up was there a manufacturing base no I mean it was a tourist town it's a beautiful lake and and you know but I mean the downtown there was everything you could walk down the street and go to a grocery store hardware store or pharmacist or whatever and now all those places are taken over by their wives a big brother on Prozac selling you know bricabrack and uh it's just uh hopelessly precious there's still a couple of stores left you can buy stuff there but most of those have been moved over off the main street down the fennel street where there's a you know a couple of plazas and there's interchange things and whatever you know it's over very quickly before we get to the trivial stuff like trump and whatever Tom Kenny paul keselowski where are they from yeah Tom Kenny's from east syracuse as was as his gold plate and paul keselowski is from down to courtland how far is syracuse from where you grew up I can't pronounce your town uh you know uh it's about 20 miles 17 miles something 17 miles so that was yeah that was a big deal to go to syracuse so you're all from that same area you all drank the same water did you all move to Boston at the same time did you know gulf wait before he moved to Boston oh yeah no he started he and tom he started at my uh my show I'm I discovered gold plate and Kenny that's my uh claim to fame and then who moved to Boston first me and then when did they come yeah within a year when did you move into the barracks well you know I moved in but I almost never stayed there thanks to the good graces of the young women of Boston area I moved in there probably after about six months I would say some time in the middle of 1980 didn't mr. meanie live in the barracks yes he did and when did he move into the barracks I would say probably 81 at some point would be my guess so in the barracks you had lennie clark barry crimans kevin meanie who else right who else rogerson Kenny rogerson yeah and an array of uh you know maniacs uh whoever was passing through why was it called the barracks yeah I have to ask Lenny but I think just the idea was just like too many men in one place that would be my take it could have been but it wasn't prison so that's interesting yeah I had too many men in one place but yeah like yeah but leading to no good you know was it a constant party this is like 19 yeah yeah yeah it was yeah it was a constant party yeah ridiculous but I was the one way to work or whatever like I always waited for sundown and I didn't do coke so that eliminated me from about 82 percent of everything I just happened to be around at some of the key moments but I was also like you know at that point I was on the cover of co-dependent quarters you know I was just they would just completely ruin everything and I would they'd wake up in the morning and everything's clean and there's coffee on it's like yeah and then note for me and I'm down at the ding working you know I mean it was I just uh I was a big cover-up artist you started the ding ho when you moved to Boston so you didn't come yeah solely to do stand-up you also came to bring the stand-up well I went to see what was going on in Boston if there was a scene I would have tried to ingratiate myself and become part of the scene but there was one kind of nomadic show the comedy connection it was never quite clear where they were going to be or for how long at that point they quickly decided to set some roots in a few places once the ding came along and kind of I guess threw down the gauntlet in a sense but uh I wasn't thinking in those terms but there was no set scene and there was an incredible amount of talent and I had been around the country enough at that point to know that's a big problem with comedy in America and it remains today as the comedian to treat it like shit you know so we treated the comedians like you know like we treat somebody like they were somebody until they proved otherwise and if somebody feels like somebody before they walk on the stage what do you know when they walk on the stage they act like they're somebody so that's you know we had so much great talent Paula and Steven Wright and Jack Gallagher and Lenny and yeah Mike Donovan and Mike McDonald and great great comics passing through like Rooney and you passed you passed her didn't you as you were saying this I was thinking when I first moved to San Francisco in 82 this was this new wave of hey I've got an idea let's treat comedians with respect yeah yeah right so I move that to San Francisco I'm being treated nicely and I keep thinking do they know who I am I swear to god Barry I keep going why are they being so nice to me don't they know who I am don't they know what I am you know because I I was a kid yeah right and you get I mean you get you you get yeah yeah I mean eventually they talk you into thinking you suck but I mean when you're in a business where you got clearly you've probably been in New York a couple other places where you wait around till 1 a.m. to play to four people and a lot's on the line and you don't do well you might not get back on again you know they treat you like shit they wear you out you have to hang around for nine hours a million times along the way you're kind of putting your place and then you finally get on and it's a hopeless situation like who are you developing doing that right there was a big complaint about the San Francisco scene in the 80s a lot of the New York and LA acts would come to San Francisco and and say it was bizarro land everybody's a star here they were right everybody was a star in San Francisco and then when they went down to Los Angeles many of them because they were treated so well right did well yeah well imagine that I mean the Holy City Zoo was the best place I was treated before I came to Boston but it was still it was still tough but you know they were they were fair and nice you know I was still finding my way they kept that up out there the only problem I ever had with San Francisco so much in that town was predicated on a contest and I just never believed in contest right so it kept me out of kept me out of there to some extent I just I just you know I give Rembrandt three stars I just don't believe it I just don't yeah no I don't and also I just it just doesn't take a lot of things into account I think the kind of stuff that all is done is a slightly higher degree of difficulty and you know when I'm up against the pies and sultry bottles on you know I may not fare that well you know the great Dan Spencer story where he went on and just told jokes with a water pistol in his pocket but nobody knew it was a water pistol and every joke he told he would just do a little squirt so within two minutes it looked like he pissed his pants I had never I never saw it but I heard about it and I thought that is an act I would do I would just be the guy who pisses himself every night I would nothing would make me happier and I won't even need a water gun considering your roots I don't think you know I I believe you because the cell don't think I mean I know they still crusty the clown from you know they just did simple well not really I think the idea of a sardonic guy and a clown outfit you know it's a natural they had it on tunnel vision or it's been and then there was flunky the clown on letterman I started doing it and then I thought I had stumbled into something then somebody told me well on tunnel vision there's a clown who reads I think DH Lawrence to kids and then there was flunky the clown who went on letterman right around the same time that I was in the clown suit they would smoke a cigarette and talk trash to Dave it's not an original idea before we move on to the truly sad stuff let's talk about Kevin Meaney for one second because enough time has passed and you know we lost Don Rickles and Don didn't really have an act Don just no John just went up there and the more I watched Don Rickles the more I realized he was a true genius the opposite of Don Rickles was Kevin Meaney who had an act but it wasn't really an act it was just Kevin well he was a great entertainer I think that the thing about him that people say well he didn't have enough material it would be that he would repeat certain material but the ad-libbing who are we talking about we're talking about Kevin oh yes okay the ad-libbing and the improvisation that he did every night was amazing and the last time I saw him work which was on his birthday a year ago when I had the honor of introducing him on a 60th birthday in Rochester he absolutely fried that audience and you know just the same as I saw him the first time he worked in front I got to see him work 35 years earlier either in San Francisco or Boston I don't I don't even remember I think it was San Francisco but he was a great entertainer he understood precepts of you know show business and showmanship that a lot of people are too hip for these days or think they're too hip for but you know I mean he understood it was a show and he took the stage and he had incredible charisma and you know and in presence and I swore to God I'd ride over to a gig with him whatever we're talking about in the car he'd bring it out on the stage with him and do 15 minutes on that very thing from that day and they're talking to me about about you know people go oh he didn't have that much material he didn't you know he was so natural on the stage that he could just take anything acted out you know and then and then and then just the fact that he was like really a multi-threat entertainers saying dance act do impressions a bunch of shit I can't do I just uh and inspire people to be funny oh and it's just so funny and I mean just so relentlessly funny and then on top of that being one of the dearest people I ever know knew and one of my dearest friends and you know I still you know the other day I went to pick up a song the column because it just touched a natural thing to do because we just were always in touch and I you know I really miss the thing about Kevin meanie is he taught me how to bomb oh yeah right well I mean there's nothing better than when we wouldn't quite connect with the audience and then he would just take it out on them it was hilarious I mean and then I mean and they would generally and then generally it would be over with and he would win that audience over with that but the best were when they were just two I mean it would literally be something you could try some physics playing the sound system sock bubble whatever it was you know what you dreamed of were those rare nights when they they just really didn't you really didn't connect with them at all because he would just ideally I mean at that point you get to see the funniest thing ever ever isn't that in many ways what comedy is it's the guy up there who has his own vision the world doesn't see it he's fighting for his life up there I mean to me that's what comedy is well that certainly can be one of the things I don't I try to avoid being in that situation you know that's just me you know I might be the exception to prove the rule well but me too yeah I would prefer but you but you've never been in a situation that was otherwise you've never ever performed without creating a situation where you challenged the audience and pushed them away and then brought them back I I don't think you've ever had a set where they were with you all the way you wouldn't allow that yeah well probably I don't know get out more than I do I just do it you know I'm like I see the ball hit the ball guy I'm not back in the video room check in to see where my shoulder is right you know I what I do is I I mean I take my things I do my preparation I have some flow to the show figured out but after that well we'll see what's what you know we'll see what's what I mean a big part of it any great comic not to say I'm one but hey you know any comic worth this so really takes a lot of reading from an audience and has a sense it's almost telepathic where wow this always works but it's not you know what they're gonna need a little bit more and then you give them one more line and with the thing you get back from that it's three months from now that last line that you came up with is what remains in your act you know but it's you know that's the thing where you just figure out they're not quite getting it I am having trouble following the news because I find it so uninspiring so uninteresting so grotesque grotesquely predictable yeah unoriginal right right yeah I mean you're dealing with a person with a you know real severe personality disorder you're talking about my divorce attorney I'm talking about Trump not my divorce attorney okay all right okay sorry go ahead Jesus Christ man you distracted me with that sorry that's okay your divorce attorney okay we're dealing with a person with a personality disorder yeah right and it's not going to change so I mean it's hopelessly predictable every once in a blue moon he'll go on a little bit of a honeymoon of everybody and ask like a human for five seconds and then that goes away and that's like five seconds every three months everybody's just so hopeful that the nightmare will end that they overweight it and you know immediately the devil on his shoulder is 97 times the size of the angel on the shoulder and even the angel on his shoulder is a corrupt fuck you know so at my sisters we're gonna have dinner tonight I'm in New Jersey my sister loves you by the way long story there was an incident at a restaurant a long time ago where you turned on somebody and you're a hero for many reasons yeah oh yeah yeah yeah we what did I do well I was gonna ask you about whether or not we could plumb the depths of Trump's depravity my sister was saying to me last night that we're good people so we can't possibly understand that's right and I've been saying that about a lot of these people for a long time like people go what do you think they're gonna do next you get like well I can't think like those people it would be a really bad sign if I could think like those people but we live in an era where people you know if nobody seems to know what's going on so they're always telling you what's going to happen I would just like someone who could actually tell me what's going on or what happened yeah or what happened exactly I can't tell you what happened or what is happening what is going on what the present moment is they're always I think three months from now you're gonna see but no one remembers that shit if it's sports and and in politics that's all you get anymore there's a bunch of loudmouth blowhard predictions you know who cares and everything is a deadline everything is urgent everything requires a quick decision and it bleeds into our personal lives I notice oh sure that everything is I need that yesterday I need that yesterday well I you just telling me about it I needed yes and breaking news breaking news and all of a sudden the nerve gas the sarin gas we have to respond to this it's been going on for years but all of a sudden now people want me to break down the military effectiveness of uh this you know what I'm not a I'm not one of those guys I don't figure out how to best blow shit up okay I think it's best to not blow any more shit up you know I mean those tomahawk missiles they shot off cost 101.41 million dollars a piece times 59 how many daycare centers are there you know how many how much healthcare right that's you know and I mean clearly it didn't do a lot whatever it is it was just I mean it was it it was like literally an 18 million dollar advertisement where you know trump showed he had balls right right but he also showed that he's completely inconsistent with what he said in the past yeah he's a tough guy except for the five deferments in Vietnam well come on I mean you know he's a guy he's a guy who got up at that convention in in Cleveland and basically told all these alleged tough guys that to stand behind him he would he's the only one who can protect us really you haven't you haven't left the house without four bodyguards in 30 years you're going to protect me rich boy air to pimp and slumlord fortune screw you you know you're a self-loathing jagger who knows you come from scum and and so you're out to prove that you know you want the whole world to overcome your self-loathing and so you so you just you know you're just as ridiculous narcissistic egomaniacal sick son of a bitch and and and unfortunately there's a lot of people in this country who have never dealt with the abuse they've suffered and so he rings the tuning fork in them and now we're all stuck in the backseat of a really bad station wagon with the most abusive father ever for the next four years right and you're thinking well better my sister than than me yeah right right right you know right well it's like those idiots who like comics really give shit to people for no reason at all because they're laughing mostly because they know oh at least it's not me you know uh we started when i when i started reagan was president i started with mixon okay you started next and it was like was her piece you know you think he was gone and each flare up but you when did you start what year 72 you really did start when nixon was president yeah wow oh my god yeah it was hard i mean i i spent five six years open for you know cover bands and bars you started pointing to everybody what comedy was yeah yeah oh i had no idea i thought she started around the time i did no now 45 years i started when i was uh i guess i was 19 i'll be 64 this year so this okay yeah that's interesting 46 years is it the same are the audiences the same or have they changed i have a theory that people do remember the past they stopped caring about it they don't forget the past they remember the invasion of iraq in 2003 they just don't care i well yeah maybe but you know when you bring it up to them and you provide the proper context and it leads to something else that they make the connections you know i the average person these days are just so overloaded you know uh uh i think it all comes back to the damn cars just you start your day in the traffic jam you come home you're in a traffic jam and in the daytime you put you in a real paranoid mood you turn on the radio you listen to some right wing guy who sounds like you feel about everybody else in traffic you get conned into that state of mind then you go sit some middle manager is kicking the shit out of y'all be at your cubicle and you're looking around at everybody else in the office because you they're always threatening everybody with layoffs and like and this is just living this cut throat awful world all the time so that they're not sitting around considering the recent past and how it affects them or how it might affect their children is understandable we have to explain to them it's our job to explain to them why it is important and why maybe they should just listen to music when they're in the traffic jam and understand that everybody else is in the traffic jam and maybe we should all work together for mass transit not mass murder wow uh huh i might do it today phil though fantastic what is your information diet because i'm having trouble getting my juices flowing every morning to read about this stuff it i i i'll tell you what i i i want you to see an end for 10 minutes and it's enough and it's like you know it's like the syrup from which i work the rest of the day you know i'm just like okay i heard those 12 humps of conventional wisdom you know and and you know i got more than enough i got more than enough to stay after them uh at that point you know uh uh and then after that you know i just jump around and i wherever i read you know i read a variety of things and and i don't have this thing where if they don't you know i'll go back to a website even though i see stuff on there often that i disagree with you know generally just generally that stuff you know the people right now who bother me the most are the ones who just so worried about the democratic party because it's this search for leader uh and uh we need to be leaders in our own lives we need to stand up and speak up for people at moments when it's called for we need to stand up for someone who's being bullied or mistreated we need to not go along with the races when we're with a bunch of white people and somebody's snick a couple of them are snickering about something we need to take a variety of stands and when we do that when we behave act on our conscience on a regular basis we if we are search for a leader will end in the mirror and then we will become a nation of leaders and then we will have caught on and we will expect the same sort of conduct out of our leaders and there's not a bigger follower in the world than a politician who understands that the folks have caught on so what's going on and and i think it requires a lot of compassion a lot of love and i think that is really the antidote to the trump stuff you know because he doesn't know what to do with that shit and i don't mean direct love towards him because that's a waste of time but you know don't hate everybody who voted for him you know they're just screwed over people and they put the wrong monster on the wrong face on the monster and trick them oh that's the problem with the country they're giving cheese to black people you know just like no the problem isn't negro cheese the problem is fucking you know the problem is that we you know there isn't more than she just did this shitty cheese to give into them and by the way you i mean i can't tell you how many people are out here who completely depend on government programs who voted for trump in upstate new york you know they just did and is that ignorance yeah it's yeah it's ignorance is being victims of propaganda and it's also just being exploited for your own self-loathing you know your own you know i mean it's just you know you know your own irrationality your own just like well lash out at something and also it's a feeling you know people know they're getting screwed over with the democrat as a president so they want change they want some sort of change unfortunately in this country this country only goes into the two directions nowhere and reverse to be an r you know so you know about the pal memo right the pal memo the pal memo was written i think in 1971 by louis powell for the chamber of commerce and he outlined this plan on how businesses can fight ralph nader and the left wing and they created all these think tanks and it was the republican party and the coke brothers and the heritage foundation the kato institute all fighting course yeah yeah with the country as dumb as it is right now and uneducated and not civic and then you look at then you look at how often those they're very advertising just plays to you know brainless nationalism jingoistic themes and it's a nightmare i don't believe in conspiracies unless i feel disenfranchised yeah then i'm susceptible to conspiracy theories and i do feel disenfranchised yeah the state of the news the way we get information the massive amount of citizens who just don't understand the issues was there a conscious decision to dumb down the citizenry well i mean part of it was great you you know you get the i mean you know you get that thing where if you just sensationalize everything you get more followers but part of it is is is self censorship and that is as the media became more corporate they don't you know i've been involved with corporate media i know people in the corporate media they don't ever say don't discuss this don't discuss that but you understand after you try after you bring in one or two stories about prison reform or you know environmental racism or something like that when it just doesn't go anywhere and you know that you kind of got a demerit against you and you know what you get fired at this newspaper you just got fired at 139 other newspapers you learn what not to cover i've i've been through this with the catholic church and child abuse again and again where people are really hot on you know because i mean i have a very good point that i make about it is like what one is there going to be a federal investigation of the crime wave against children by this incredibly powerful organization in our country when it when it's someone going to hold them accountable in the same way you would hold a ceo of a major corporation accountable for hiding funds and declaring fake bank bankruptcies after you've had settlements made against you you know and and then you cover it up i mean literally the bishop of the cardinal of new york dolem when he was in milwaukee he there's a big supposed payout for all those deaf kids from that school that had just been so egregiously you know raped and abused forever uh they uh he there's letters between him and the vatican oh don't worry about it i'm just going to hide all the money in this burial fund literally a burial fund and we'll declare bankruptcy and they'll never collect anything and that's exactly what happened if if general electric they would get nailed they would at least take the ceo away in in in handcuffs he might he might not spend a day in jail but he did least face that embarrassment it doesn't happen with this church and people you know you know what every town eventually you find out that the bishop that is pretty pretty connected and knows everybody and controls a lot of stuff and they've got ears everywhere uh let me let me ask you a couple questions about this because we had louis theruan from the bbc and he just did an amazing documentary that's in theaters right now called my Scientology movie and one of the questions i asked him which is pretty funny right is that pretty funny right it's a funny movie yeah i said well you know it's just a religion you know aren't all religions shake down operations when you read about Scientology the cult yeah and your experience with the catholic church how angry do you get at Scientology well i get angry at Scientology i mean the first up to give you a personality test and if you have one they move on to the next potential victim but uh well what would you say is i am a catholic and i am a catholic or i was a catholic you know and and i and i arose from that and i know you know the worldwide impact of what they've done the catholic church has done more damage to ireland than the brits did no in one way they controlled every element of that society every element and with their draconian you know hateful anti-humanist teachings and and horrible misogyny and and literally enslaving women who were pregnant often by priests and taking their children and you know forcing them to be born but then not caring for them enough that a lot of them died and get buried in these in you know like sewage because they weren't because they couldn't be uh they couldn't be uh you know uh baptized uh you know i mean there is such deep and you know the physical the beatings and whatever the just right down the line uh uh this sort of like imposition of you know while while the front office lived well this imposition of sort of like a kelvinist lifestyle on the on the poor of of uh ireland um and uh you know they just did a huge amount of damage and but they controlled everything they controlled everything no matter where you went they controlled the media they controlled the government they controlled you know obviously the churches the schools the hospitals you name it it was all catholic and you you look at what they did to those people and and then what they did to how many children were abused and harmed by that that church in that country and in the mindset that oh well right now it's the youngest country in europe and those kids are spitting the bit ireland has a great deal of hope right now they're pushing to uh get rid of their ace amendment which here is against cruel and unusual punishment there it is cruel and unusual punishment because it it you know it outlaws abortion and birth control and really you know so uh i'm sorry what is it what is the eighth amendment it's it's just the anti choice you know in ireland it's just yeah yeah yeah anti-women's reproductive rights um is the catholic church is it redeemable do you feel it's redeemable do you believe really no no no no i don't think you know i mean if this guy's a socialist uh like he claims to be give me the keys to the vault i'll help you redistribute some wealth i mean do you know how much money they said i know of course not no one can possibly ask this you know how about just letting humanity see the art treasures they've secreted away for centuries you know let's just see the booty you know that that in and of itself i mean can we at least look at what you got uh it's his job to change the subject to not the church and and he's always you know he's always gone which way the wind blew which is why he was tight with the desk a lot of people uh back in the day in argentina so you said see the booty and i'm not going to take the bait the uh thing that i don't understand i i i know i know it wasn't bait not coming from me i know i know i know i know i know i know but it was just i know i'm better than that no i'm not the thing i don't understand you're not i know i am i i'll give you that so the thing i don't understand about the catholic church i'm a defender you're gonna get angry at me for saying this i'm a defender of the catholic church i think the good outweighs the bad and i'm as we've talked about before a theater white a teddy white pragmatist uh and i think that the church does some good work and liberation theology that kind of stuff so church has nothing to do with liberation theology you want to switch it all over the liberation theology and put the put the vatican in managua i might have a chat with you but uh in the meantime uh that is it is an ancient and corrupt institution that is there basically this point to preserve its massive wealth okay that's what i don't understand and you have to explain this to me i look at priests i look at the pope they take vavs of celibacy and poverty so i justify their wealth i don't think they all do well i justify their wealth by saying it's not going to the clerics it's going to keep the church going is that a fair statement no that's not a fair statement well i mean the reason the reason that that uh that they came up with the chastity there you know celibacy was so so when the when the church usurped land and whatever and then would make somebody a bishop they would get to keep that land when the bishop died or whatever i mean it would it all goes back to greed it all goes back to greed and it's and of course you know if that can't be passed along to anyone it could certainly not be passed along to women unless you know you're happy to be in a nunnery somewhere do we know what the catholic church is worth is there's the vatican bank there is no telling what the catholic church is worth they have priceless they have so much priceless art treasures and god knows what else they have and you know in gold and bm who knows there's no telling but i just know that if this guy is a socialist if you were really a socialist that you really believed in the redistribution of wealth he could just throw the keys you know to somebody and say okay that bringing this stuff out in the daylight and divvying it up is there a guy in the vatican who's balancing the books and knows exactly what the church is worth i imagine that there are various levels of that but i don't think that anyone has a i think they probably go through generations of their own people will never get near the you know the deep fall is it like the pentagon and that it can't be audited that nobody really knows the answer to that question i yeah i don't i don't see how you i don't see how you could because you know you i mean to just to just go through and put a price again on all this priceless on this art and stuff is you know would be in a monumental task so i i don't i don't see how you could even make a reasonable guess i just know they have way too much what is liberation theology when did it start well it happened it happened it happened in the late 70s early 80s and when when the church decided to abandon a lot of parishes central and south america at least this is my understanding of it and they just left behind a bunch of bibles and uh the people that got the bibles just started emulating Jesus and kind of ignoring the rest of the stuff because bibles are like you know what's the most famous bible the king james bible it doesn't even have to like with jesus christ you know it's just yeah i wonder wonder who edited this oh render under Caesar oh i hey i like that it's subtle but effective uh so these people really started behaving in a truly christian fashion to one another and started thriving well when they started thriving or doing a lot better the church suddenly got interested in getting back in there again but then they didn't want the the clerics or the people that had gone along with this have the power they wanted the power to go back to the you know the institutional church and there was a big conflict well i've been watching movies and reading about Scientology and there are offshoots of Scientology i guess the catholic church will have another reformation maybe what do you what do you see in 50 years well i mean you know i mean i don't know i i don't know i it's really until they break open the vault and really behave in a christian fashion and really save countless lives they could save and and and until they wake up on you know birth control and abortion and women's rights and and reverse their misogyny and and and only and and address their homophobia beyond the occasions when it's like a little bit like okay okay we'll be less homophobic now because it will distract you from the fact that we still haven't done shit about the crime wave against children you know there's not much to say again i just see the thing it's just such a thorough thoroughly unjust organization completely hampered by its own its own hypocrisy that if it stops behaving hypocritically yeah that's one thing that could save the church i don't ever see that happening there's just you know there's a power is just too entrenched there and this guy is a lost leader this guy that's in there it's his job to change the subject and not the church uh great he's opposed to global warming great i'm a poll you know how i want to change the climate of the church and make it more open okay and make it more open okay and and and let's turn in everyone let's render on disease or every one of these goddamn rapists that you're still covering up for and let's get all the let's get all the facts out there and let's pay off the people whose lives have been ruined and who are incapable of really living you know normal lives because the incredible damage done to them by that church and that church is and that church is you know uh you know uniformed representatives who teach them who teach them that sex is dirty and evil and terrible while they rape them that's a pretty fucking profound and deep thing and when you when you put it out hundreds of thousands of times worldwide and then you deal with every family every person everyone who can't figure out why someone's so screwed up their whole life like i've lost friends to this people i knew committed suicide as adults and teenagers because of what priests did to that and there's been no real justice about it so i'm glad that you have a with all due respect a bit of a glib take on the fucking catholic church but it's a pox upon humanity as far as i'm concerned a pox you know it might be convenient it might be convenient for you but i got the dead friend right i got the dead friends you know and these fuckers killed them by making them hate themselves right right by making them hate themselves by teaching them to hate themselves by first teaching them that whatever was about to happen to them was evil under and then and then and then have some confused garbled bullshit artist pedophile come and rape them and then tell them that their families threat whatever will bring down the power of god upon them if they say a word and you want these people to tear it they're like they they rob them of god and their belief system yeah absolutely absolutely right absolutely taking me a long time to get back anywhere with that all i was was emotionally and verbally abused by a priest every day who hated me because for some reason i was the only one who would go up and serve mass with him and i had already been raped and so when he put his hands on me i hit him with an elbow and he did it again i hit him with an elbow again and he didn't bother me anymore i was waiting to get in trouble for that i thought it was weird that i didn't get in trouble but i couldn't go home and tell my parents i didn't want to serve mass with this monster every morning so every morning on on the altar this son of a bitch called me everything in the book and and sentenced me to hell in front of a bunch of people went on this nice little pen year old boy who got up shoveled the walk at the church you know put on his put on his his surplus in cassock went up set up the altar and served mass and then went out there while this malevolent evil child rapist would would would announce to the announce to the congregation several times that i was evil and nobody stood up for me until finally one day somebody sat around about after three years at three or four years but but you know every day i was there was a day the guy was frustrated because every day i was there was a day the pond was stopped from so i took a big hit on that level every time the what what what you were there every time every time i was there serving mass with him every morning that the pond with him stopped he knew he knew he couldn't rape me or he was afraid to oh the pond was he tried to the pond of victim yeah yeah but there were other altar boys there than that that's fresh you know that's fresh meat for him well it wasn't it was me week after week i lived near the church every week because whoever was scheduled would can't fall at the last minute and then father kasey the other priest would call my parents at five a.m. and i would serve that week and this went on for years has anybody from the church talk to you or they all lawyer lawyer it up oh they don't talk to me they don't talk to me i'll pay i was supposed to testify they made me they made a pretty good settlement in one case before they let me i was on the list of i was on the you know i was going to testify and they they settled that case my friend Dennis Brennan's case my friend Dennis Brennan who said they said well we'll settle but we you can't i mean you can say what you thought happened but you can never say that we settled or anything and then i said that's never going to happen he was very courageous and five minutes later they caved in and did the same settlement like so and he was a victim of father and there is the same guy i dealt with Thomas Mary you know when i think of him i i hope there is a hell and then i think of two words extra crispy is there any advice you would give to people who have been molested by priests do you advise them to yeah blow the whistle blow the whistle blow the whistle all uh snap yeah and spiritually what advice do you give spiritually i would say give them back give give the poison back to the distributor of the poison it's theirs you didn't do anything wrong you were young you're exploitable you don't think you will i'll tell you what go look at a bunch of kids that were your age when you were that are your age you know i i do a thing where i'll take someone to a school and they'll say well i could have done this i could have done that i was 11 my younger brother was getting abused too i could have done this or that and i'll take that person to a school wait for the school to let out and i'll pick on an 11-year-old kid and they'll say exactly what he said to me about himself and the guy go no it's like well that's who you were you know and since we all know how young 11 is because that you know so look at someone just i would say almost look at it algebraically like take your name out of the thing and just make it an algebra thing and just just your x or your y or whatever and you're going to get you're going to understand even doing it wrong it's tough because i i'm not catholic but i know they preach forgiveness so i could see how that rattles inside your head well you know i mean you know here's the thing about forgiveness someone's got to apologize before you can really forgive them okay right right so i mean what i don't do is carry malevolence and hatred and vengeance in my heart and that's about the best i could do but thomas mary never asked me for forgiveness and so i never forgive you know and and the guy who raped me i've never forgiven him i have context for him i know he came up and i managed to figure out who he was and what happened to him and that he died in prison after living a miserable life of raping little boys and uh you know i have pity for him for the bad life he lived and i feel very fortunate that i didn't become what i resisted but anyway how about that trump i was gonna say you're listening to barry crimans this is our easter show we would like to wish you all a happy easter yeah a blessed easter yes well yeah welcome back jesus well i thank you for talking about this and i know well it just breaks this way sometimes you mostly interviews are about this yeah you know yeah it's all right and i'm sorry about the glib thing but no no no i am i mean that i if i'm guilty of anything because from the time i met you i remember the time i met you and we had a drink and i was glib about ronald reagan i had this detached smirk on my face that you wanted to smack off i remember that and you and you said to me you know you're not as deeply committed i sense a detachment to the cause and i said yeah i mean i'm not going down to nicaragua with you yeah and the older i get uh the more i become like you but i am glib i am glib and i am detached and i you know and uh it's it's a i especially on this subject yeah i just can't imagine going through what you went through and i can't and it's it's one of those things when it comes to kids where you don't want to look and think about this stuff and that's what they play on you see david they play on two things our kindness and our cowardice the kindness is we just don't want to believe that this stuff goes on as well and the cowardice is it's scary look away and so those two things so then you put out a guy who's always in the white gets just gets the gets the you know gets the compact pulpoville and and talks about global warming and and it makes a few just vague you know steps very baby steps towards you know gay rights or something and and you know and and that's enough that's a distraction it's enough of a distraction and now everybody doesn't have to think about little kids children getting raped by clerics for the past you know however many centuries but the thing is that's gone on forever and it's a sick and tedious thing and there are people at every level of that church who are guilty as hell of everything and are terrified of anything but a further cover-up and i i just think i just think that it is just too rotten too deeply to the core to do anything but to just like you know occupy the place burst open the fucking vault and and and find a way to distribute to the really the world's poor people and i'll tell you what they're doing right now they're sending all these creeps to the third world and in the future we'll hear about this and believe me well all i can say is i've been right in the past about you know things that would happen for instance 20 some years ago i said when you find the people trading chal pornography when you get into their computers you're going to find pictures from the kids down the street pick up the paper any day of the week now and find the way they get to these guys they get busted on a chal pornography rapper the next thing you know there you find out that they've got you know children that they're actively abusing themselves can be that obvious case in point jared ogle i think the problem we have to wrap it up i apologize because i could go you know well but uh i think the problem is twofold as i see it one is personally as as a jew i feel ill at ease going after the catholic church because you know i i think a lot of well i'm going to give you help me help with this compensation okay okay thank you we use it in my church a lot so i i i think i make allowances for other religions because i want allowances for my religion i'll even be glib about Scientology because i'll say well not no religion is perfect like talking to you it is glib secondly because of the establishment clause in the first amendment i think the fbi in this country i think they have a they have trouble prosecuting churches because it looks like the government is render unto Caesar it doesn't matter what your church is if you're raping abusing physically beating emotionally abusing children that's criminal activity okay pay taxes and take away their tax-free status okay we're going to wrap it up by the way uh you're going to be at the throckmorton theater in sand not in not where is mill valley mill valley greatest place in the world are you going to see mortis all i hope so he always hangs out for it oh i hope he comes in that night i would uh yeah i would love to sit more than welcome to make some remarks yeah you'll be in santa cruise on sunday and the throckmorton theater on i'll be i'll be in a i'll be in a santa cruise on on saturday night uh place is either called the kitchen or food or something like that community centers place and then uh and then on sunday you can find on my twitter feed at crime and then on sunday night uh now that monday night i think i'm at the punchline but i haven't heard the final word i'm sick i'm supposed to be there with over ten on monday night wow what a great show barry crimans and your movie is call me lucky and follow you on twitter twitter twitter twitter what is your what is your handle crimans c r i m m i n s and and uh the special is available in louis ck down at whatever threatens you whatever threatens you is the name of your comedy special yes directed by louis ck yes and call me lucky is directed by chosen by uh the fans of uh being taro bang which is a big comedy website uh as the best special of last 2016 yes very good up against some serious bright young competition so i was flattered i think i just snuck in yeah i was a star i mean i was literally listening to the announcement thinking i want help yeah i wonder who on my category and when they said me i didn't even register well thank you sir entire award background okay thank you sir i love you david i love you i love you that's your listeners okay