 What have you called me out on Twitter? So is this what you want? Well now you got it. What is up everybody? This is Chris from the Rewired Soul, where we talk about the problem, but focus on the solution. And if you're new to my channel, my channel's all about mental health and what I like to do is pull different topics from the YouTube community to try to teach you how to improve your mental and emotional well-being. So if you're into that, make sure you subscribe and ring that notification bell. So yeah, I got called out on Twitter. This dude got called out on Twitter. Fun, fun thing about that is, I get comments sometimes that are like, you can't take criticism, Chris, but I do. It's just some things I'm like, eh, whatever, you know, to each their own. For example, I just had a comment, which I'm gonna put on the screen, that said, I'm too high energy and I need to chill out and da, da, da, da. And I just replied to each their own. Like some of it's criticism, but a lot of you enjoy that energy. A lot of my clients have enjoyed that energy because it keeps people engaged. But anyways, anyways, somebody called me out on Twitter and they were absolutely right. And by the way, if you're not yet, follow me on Twitter and Instagram, same handle, at the Rewired Soul. I'm trying to get to 10,000 followers on Instagram so I can make life easier for all of you so you can just swipe up on my stories. But I also tweet out a bunch of stuff I'm like getting into Twitter. I still barely have any idea how it works, but I try to keep in touch with all of you on Twitter. Twitter is actually one of the best ways to get ahold of me by tweeting at me because not that many people do. But anyways, here's the tweet that I got earlier today. From Ariana Wolfe, the Rewired Soul. You've been doing a bunch of videos about unhealthy relationships, but maybe you could talk about a YouTube couple that actually have a good, stable, and healthy relationship. Thanks and love your videos. And I'm like, dang. You know, and yeah, that is something that I don't do enough of. And I actually replied to her and, you know, Ariana, you gave me the idea for this video, so big ups to you. You're amazing. And something that I was talking to her about is something that I'm gonna touch on in this video because I've tweeted out things like who's the most beloved YouTubers and all stuff like that. A lot of people say Jenna Marbles. A lot of people say people like Sophia Nygaard. And Jenna Marbles and Julian, as well as Sophia and her fiance, I think his name is Tyler. Don't kill me if I don't know his name. They have great relationships, but there's not much to kind of analyze. And there might be a reason for that, which I'm gonna touch on. So anyways, yeah, I wanna focus on some positive because how about we pull some positive things? Maybe some of you will learn better by focusing on the positive, all right? So what I did was, what I did was I hopped on the YouTube and I started to search. I started to do some Jenna and Julian research, right? So first thing I did was type in Jenna and Julian fighting, right? And like, I couldn't really find anything. Then I type in Jenna and Julian arguing. Still couldn't find anything. I'm like, okay, interesting. So then I found this video saying like, Jenna and Julian funny moments. And I was like, maybe I can pull something out of here. So check this out on YouTube from what I found. This is the closest you will find to Jenna and Julian fighting. Why are you recording, Julian? Why did you just press record on my camera? I didn't press anything. You shouldn't leave your paper towels around. Open it up. Out leaving paper towels on the, everything. You're gonna catch me on fire. Do it again. I'm sorry. He just tried to throw all my camera at me and he's making fun of me for being scared. Oh! Save me from him. I'll save you. No, I don't want to get saved by you. No, you're the root of my suffering. I'm sorry. So you go, you go, what the fuck is your problem? I'm gonna put this on your bed tonight. So yeah, isn't that kind of fascinating with a lot of the couples that people look at and say you're toxic or whatever, you can find just like montages of just fighting and arguing and toxic behavior. But you can't with these two, all right? So if you notice the clips that I used in there, they were like playfully fighting. And it's just fascinating because I watch a lot of couples. I've been in a ton of terrible relationships too. And one recommendation I would have for you, like what I see from them and why it works is whenever there's kind of like a jab or a poke or whatever, it's like done in a playful way, right? Like Julien'll come over and he'll like cuddle her or hug her or whatever. And like so much, so much is based on our body language. Okay? So like if I would like, Tristan's usually sitting right over there. She's not here right now. She's picking up her little cousin from school right now. But she's usually sitting right there. So if I were to just joke with her and she was over there and I was over here, that body language is a little bit different, right? So like this morning, this morning I said something stupid and sassy, right? I'd say a lot of things that make Tristan like give me that look like you're an idiot, why am I living with you, right? And I like went over and I like, you know, cuddled her and kind of poked her and stuff. And we're both laughing. So like that's a recommendation I have is like, you know, keep it like, keep it playful. You know what I mean? And don't, don't get me wrong. Serious discussions need to happen. I'm going to talk about that more. But that's a way to kind of diffuse it and kind of bring up subjects without making it all serious. But here's the thing too. One of the reasons I see Jenna and Julian work is because they're both playful and they don't take things too seriously. So in the past, like I've dated women who cannot take a joke, who cannot take a joke, right? And I'm a very playful guy. I joke around a lot. And like, I like, God, is there anything worse than being with somebody where like you joke and they're like, what does that mean? What is that supposed to mean? And they get like offended like, and you're like living with that person or you're out on a date and it's just like, ugh. So this is one of the reasons why in my last video I was talking about, you know, individual therapy versus couples therapy, right? Like if you're getting offended, usually that's a you problem. It's not a them problem. It's usually a you problem. So my recommendation, if you're in a relationship and it doesn't even have to be like, you know, a significant other. Maybe it's with friends or family members or whatever. Like ask yourself, like, do you take things too seriously? Do you get offended or whatever? And there's nothing wrong with being a more serious person. Not everybody has to joke around and be a big kid all the time. But like when something happens, like this is why mindfulness is so important in training your brain to pause. So you can ask a question, what was their intent? Right? So anybody who struggles with black and white thinking, right? You have to sit down and ask yourself, what is true? What is false? Because I used to have a brain where I got highly offended and easily offended by everything somebody said, right? I have a screwed up mental filter. That's a me problem. That's not a they problem, right? So like, stop, take a breath and ask yourself, like, were they saying that in a joking way or were they saying that in a malicious way? All right? Ooh, you thought you were gonna get up out of this video without me dropping in some more psychology on you? So fun fact, I actually talked about this experiment in a Jacksepticeye video that I made last year that barely anybody saw. I have less than a thousand views. And if you don't believe me, here's some proof. Today we're gonna be talking about Jacksepticeye, a positive mental attitude and a gorilla. But anyways, I'm sure this video's gonna get a lot more views because my channel's grown. So let's go over it again, all right? So about a decade ago or so, there was this doctor by the name of Dr. Daniel Simmons and he wanted to do this experiment. So what they did was they brought a bunch of people into a room and they put them in a room and they had them watch this TV, okay? And what they did was they had two different teams, if you will. And one was wearing white jerseys, one was wearing black jerseys. And they passed the basketball around to each other. So the people in the room only had one job, just one simple job. They said, count how many times each team passes the basketball, right? So they would say, okay, you watch the team wearing white jerseys, you watch the team wearing the black jersey, count how many times they passed the ball. And at the end of it, surprise, surprise, they pretty much got it right. Like almost everybody got the answer right, like however many times it was. But here's the thing, after the experiment, they were like, did you notice anything weird that happened during that video? And they're like, no. And then they're like, well, you didn't see like a gorilla walk through the middle of the basketball court and people are like, what you talking about, right? Like they're like, what are you talking about? So what they did was they rewound the tape, played it again, and this is what actually happened. All right, so what is that? Why did that happen? Well, Dr. Daniel Simmons is actually a psychologist and he was testing out a theory of, do we focus on what we train our brain to focus on? So what happened in that experiment was they were focusing on how many times the ball was passed. All right, but as they did more experiments, what they found was our brain focuses on what we train it to, so you can do that with positive and negative aspects. So maybe because we're not seeing the fighting and all that other stuff, is it possible? I want you to ask yourself this question. Is it possible that Jenna and Julian have a positive relationship because that's what's being focused on. They're focusing on the positive rather than the negative. All right, like this is real stuff. This is why gratitude lists are important. I was just hanging out with my buddies from RKVC at that convention that was here in town and my buddy Rod was telling me that he started doing a gratitude list. And I asked him, I said, have you noticed a difference in your life? He writes, here's what he does. Here's what Rod does. He writes one thing he's grateful for each day, just one. He doesn't spend more than like a minute on it. And he's already noticed over the past few months how his perspective is changing. He's noticed he's being more positive. He's being more grateful and all that. By the way, RKVC, they're my boys. I'm gonna collab with them pretty soon. Go subscribe to their channel. I'm gonna link it down below. But anyways, I want you guys to think about it. Like look at other YouTubers who are putting their dirty laundry out there and all of that. Like, here's the thing. Here's the thing, like you don't need to do that. Even if you're a vlogger, you don't have to do that. Like there's certain boundaries that need to be set, especially if you're in the public light, right? Now I know exactly. I know exactly what all of you pessimists are thinking who are watching this video. You're probably like, well, I bet they fight and argue when they're off camera. Well, no shit they do, okay? And they just bought a freaking house together which is arguably the most stressful thing you can do in your entire life, all right? So of course they argue, but they're not highlighting that. In public, they settle it on their own. Like most people fight, most people argue. One of the misconceptions that we get is we're supposed to meet our soulmates and what's supposed to happen is no fights, no arguments. That would mean that we're not dating a freaking human being, all right? If you want that, I think they're making some new technology where you can like date a robot or whatever it is, all right? So CNN put out this article about this guy who fell in love with this anime girl who's a singer. There's like holograms of her that sing on stage. She's apparently pretty popular. Her name is Miku. And apparently this man married this girl. Should I call her a girl? Like what should I call it? I know it's not a girl, but it's supposed to be a girl. But then again, this guy walked down the aisle with a doll. Like what? But here's the thing, like Tristan and I, a lot of you comment, like you see me say all these wonderful things about my beautiful girlfriend and everything, like our relationship is pretty freaking solid. I think we just celebrated two years together. I can count on less than one hand how many arguments we've had, all right? And when we do, I don't come bring it over here. You know why? It's none of your damn business. If it is some of your business, maybe I'll talk to Tristan and say, hey, I think my audience might be able to learn from this. Do you mind if I share this experience, right? But me being in this position, there's certain things that people don't need to know. And I know you guys watching this, not all of you are YouTubers. In fact, most of you are not YouTubers. But think about that in your own relationship. How many people need to know about it, right? So do you need to be posting passive aggressive things on Facebook or Twitter or Instagram when your boyfriend or your girlfriend does something that you don't like? Don't do it, keep it between you two, okay? Now, don't get me wrong, support is huge. Like, my recommendation is that you have that one friend. That one friend who you can talk to about these things, okay? Maybe it's not even that friend because I talked about in the last video that sometimes we get this enabling, right? Save it for your therapist, okay? Save it for that person or if you're part of like a 12-step program. Save it for the meetings or save it for your sponsor. You don't need to make everything so public. Like, I am working on something really exciting involving social media that I don't think's ever been done before. But like, here's the thing, social media isn't necessarily a bad thing. It's just the way that we use it is really frickin' stupid sometimes, all right? So no, I don't think that Jenna and Julian have a terrible relationship behind the scenes, but I definitely think there's things that we can learn from and pick up on from their positive behaviors and why they work so well together, all right? So thank you again, Ariana, for calling me out on this, all right? And if any of you have recommendations or comments on like other couples I might be able to cover and maybe analyze and see what maybe they're doing right in their relationship, but like I said, like most of the couples who are doing well on YouTube, there's not much to even look at because they're just having fun together. That's what they're doing. But if you have any suggestions, let me know down in the comments below, all right? Anyways, that's all I got for you with this video. If you liked this video, please give it a thumbs up. If you're new, make sure you subscribe and ring that notification bell because I make a ton of videos. And a huge, huge, huge thank you to everybody supporting the channel over on Patreon. You are all amazing. And if you would like to become a patron, support the channel, get some exclusive extra special stuff, click or tap on that icon right there, all right? Thanks again so, so much for watching. We'll see you next time.