 Have you ever been around a narcissist? If you have, you know being around one can make you feel like your soul is being sucked dry until there's nothing left. Sanderson's sister style. Sometimes we brush off this draining feeling and even change how we act to please the narcissist because we love them and in hopes it placates them. It may seem harmless, making one or two tiny changes but those little tweaks can take big chips out of you and who you are. Let's take a look at five ways narcissistic abuse changes who you are. According to science. Number one, literal brain damage. Our brains are the most intricate and delicate of puzzles. When one part of our brain is stimulated or changed, other parts need to adjust to compensate. When you experience consistent narcissistic abuse in your life, your brain will change to compensate for this treatment. In our article, long-term narcissistic abuse can cause brain damage, author, educator and researcher Kim Said explains that both the amygdala and the hippocampus are both negatively impacted by being a victim of narcissistic abuse. The amygdala, which controls our life functions and fight or flight response and get to a point where it's constantly on meaning you constantly feel on edge. Your hippocampus, which is crucial for short-term memory can decrease in function the more you're exposed to narcissistic abuse. This means they can gas let you even easier than before. These decreased brain functions are a huge way narcissistic abuse can change you. Number two, unknowingly, becoming part of the cycle. If you see a young child screaming in a store, you might think to yourself, ah, they can't tell their parents what's wrong. But what if you see a teenager doing the same thing? Do you still have the same thought? Chances are your thoughts shift to what were you taught as a kid? Emily Labetut of Southern University Law Review wrote in her article on the effects of narcissistic abuse that a healthy interpersonal relationship is where the individual can see the situation from their perspective, as well as someone else's perspective. However, if your parent was a narcissist, they only saw things from their own eyes because only they are important. In 2021, this idea was proven by University of Amsterdam researchers in a study monitoring children of narcissistic parents, both on and off social media. Unless the child makes a conscious decision to stay off social media and or act differently, they're more likely to become a narcissist themselves. That's a fun idea. But if Cinderella became just like her step-sisters, ugh, let's move on. Number three, forced agreeableness. We've all heard of Pavlov and his dog. Humans are the same and can be conditioned. If you are used to being around a narcissist and them getting mad at certain conversations or actions, this can condition you to act and speak in certain ways. In Ahmed Pub's Health Science Journal, Rivka Edery, Psi D explains that a child with parents that are authoritative, rejecting, and traumatic towards the child can grow up with certain learned or conditioned personality traits, such as introversion, kindness, and agreeableness. Now we're not saying that introversion, kindness, and agreeableness are bad qualities. However, they can be negative when you act this way to stay out of a narcissist's crosshairs. Number four, PTSD for narcissistic abuse. Abuse comes in all shapes and sizes. When you're experiencing narcissistic abuse consistently, it's possible that you can develop a sort of post-traumatic stress response. This response is called narcissistic abuse syndrome or narcissistic victim syndrome. Registered psychologist, registered social worker, and writer, Shirley Porter, lists the symptoms of narcissistic abuse syndrome as confusion, fear, guilt, shame, low self-esteem, and reduced self-confidence. So the longer you're around a narcissist and their abuse, the more at-risk you are for developing these thoughts and feelings. Remember, you are loved and important, even if a narcissist is telling you otherwise. Please reach out to a mental health professional if you've experienced narcissistic abuse. And number five, changes to your self-esteem. Have you ever had a day where you're feeling amazing? Your fit is on point and literally nothing can knock you off your pedestal. These days may not happen as often in the presence of a narcissist. In 2018, a different group of researchers from the University of Amsterdam did a study on narcissistic leaders and their followers. They found that the lower the follower's self-esteem, the more abusive they perceived their leader. Due to the follower's low self-esteem and consistent negativity from the leader, the follower begins to do more seeking the leader's approval. Almost a carrot on a stick that the follower never obtains. This ultimately resulted in reduced performance and higher rates of burnout. Narcissistic abuse is like erosion. You may not see a change immediately, but over time, you can see the drastic difference. Have you ever experienced narcissistic abuse? Did you see any changes in yourself after a while of being around that garbage? Let us know your story in the comments below. We have more videos on signs of narcissistic abuse here if you wanna learn more. As always, keep an eye on Cy for more Psych2Go content and thanks so much for watching.