 We've been doing the show for 11 years and we work together and then we talk with you about your work and your creative process. That's so lovely and I'm glad to be here with you. And if you have a question after the work period about your work or your creative process, Audrey's going to tell you how to get in touch with Audrey. Because that's healthy. I love that version. If you have a question and you are inside of the Zoom, all you need to do is click on the participant tab. Likely at the bottom of your screen on a laptop or the top of your on an iPad or a tablet. Inside of the participant tab, there is a little button that says raise your hand. If you click on it, a little blue hand will appear and I will call on you if we've got time. If you're watching on HowlRound.tv, you can tweet at us at Watch Me Work SLP with the hashtag HowlRound, H-O-W-L-R-O-U-N-D. Or you can tweet at the Public Theater, which is at Public Theater NY. Or you can write to the Public Theater's Instagram and we get those questions as well. And that's it. All right. Okay. So here we go. We're going to work together for 20 minutes. And then we're going to talk. All right. All right. Okay. You got a question. Oh, all right. Cool, cool. All right. I'm very sorry if I pronounced your name wrong. I'm going to read it out. You got it. Oh, yes. Yeah. Okay. I think we have reached it. I believe is up next. What a beautiful name. Yeah. We got it. Click in. Oh, there you go. Yes. Thank you, Audrey. You said it right. This is the second time I'm asking question. And I'm, I've been on Zoom calls all day, all week, all summer. And I'm, I still want to show up so I'm really grateful for. You all. Thank you. of this residency program with a performing arts presenter in town, and it was supposed to last a year starting in January, but then there's six of us, and there's some of the projects are kind of, well, they're going to extend a bit longer because of the pandemic, like maybe people will present the finished work in the spring or who knows. So we're developing new projects for the organization and in return, the organization offers a stipend and a physical space of kind of like small black box theater. I mean, maybe what they actually wanted to do was support our process and a kind of conversation amongst us, but in the end, we do present something. So but now because of the pandemic conditions, the organization is asking us like, what do you want? Well, how do you, what do you need? And I'm really having trouble knowing what I can expect or what I can ask for because well, when I usually don't work in a theater context, like my experience is from visual arts where everyone's like always doing everything on their own, or at least in my, my world. That is the case. And then so it's like, I don't have that kind, I don't have like a, an understanding of, of that. And yeah, I want support because I do think like this is not a good time to be thriving as an artist, even though I'm trying really hard, but I don't know what that looks like in this context. Like maybe it could just be like, give me more money. But I also think that's not the really the only, like what I'm, what I'm, maybe there are other material things that could be offered or support systems. But I don't know what, what I do. I don't have any ideas. I just know that I'm, I'm struggling. Wow, that's a great question. Did you like their offer of, of a stipend and a space? I mean, did that seem like it was going to be helpful to you? The stipend is useful. The space, I think, because that everyone's doing work around ecological issues, a lot of, and a lot of people were planning to do something maybe in another location, like they were considering it. And I was going to start in the, in the theater and then take people on a procession out in downtown. So I, I was never so attached to the space. Like I don't need it, I guess, because I'm not, but I thought it would like part of what I liked about doing the residency was I thought, oh, I've never, I've never worked in this way. Maybe I'll really be challenged to work in this like kind of this space that has no, they're there. Like I'm used to working in places where they already have like a history or context, but the box is like you can put any, you can do anything in there. Right. So I'm, it's fine. I don't, I don't, I don't care about the space, I guess. Money is more interesting to me, but, but I, I don't think that's really what I'm, I don't know what I want. And then, yeah. Or do you, I mean, if they could give you anything? Like, because maybe you do know what you want. Maybe you just don't think you're going to get it. So do you know, you see what I mean? I mean, yeah, maybe if they could give you anything, if they could give you I mean, more money deferring the project for another year, you know, making it last for two years instead of one year, you know? Yeah, making this year like just to give me. And then, you know, right? I consider, I think that, that there is a part of it where I think, like, maybe like the idea of going into the second year doesn't like doesn't appeal to me because it feels like it's dragging out this thing that is actually a lot of work to go to all these meetings and stuff. And so part of me is like, maybe the acknowledgement would be, hey, pandemic was really weird and hard. And we're not going to. They're already like planning to have a call for the next cohort. And like, I'm thinking, but you, but you, you had all these touring, not all these, like it's not such a big thing, not a group, but like, you had a touring company who was going to come and now they're not. So like, what are you doing? And I try, we tried to ask about that, but I don't think that they're like trying to bring us into their programming process or be like, hey, we're going to tell you everything we're doing. Like it's sort of, they're still figuring it out and they don't want to tell us. And I'm thinking like, well, we're, we're right here. Like we are here. Like let's talk about what we can do. And they're kind of thinking like, what's next? What's next? And so I kind of feel like, yeah, maybe one of the things I did think about is why don't you just ask us all to be on for the second year. And then, but that's not really, they're like, we're moving on to the next cohorts. Yeah, but if they're asking you, if they're asking you, what do you need? Right? It sounds to me very clearly that it would be helpful while it is a drag to have to go to all the meetings and it is time consuming. Yeah, it sounds like it would be helpful if they kept you guys on for another year, not just you, but the group. Right. You know, to acknowledge, hey, act of God, you know, force, mature, you know what I mean? I mean, we have to acknowledge that. I mean, what they're doing is pretending that it's kind of isn't really happening, you know, like, and so I think it would help spiritually, if they acknowledge the difficulty you guys are having. I think that's it. Extended your residency. I think they should extend your residency and include you in the wonderful things that are going to be happening next year when things get back to normal. Whatever that's going to look like. Yeah. And if you need that, ask for it, whether or not you get it, you know, who knows, but at least you're going to put it out there and maybe you could contact the other members. Do you know them? Are you in contact with the other folks who have the residency? Yes, part of it is that the that we we are meant to be in conversation with each other and and critiquing each other's work that we do know each other. Yeah, I think it's not it's not that that, like, obviously, that the pandemic has been mentioned and talked about and and Black Lives Matter has been has been come up. But it's not like it feels like it's not really an acknowledgement. I don't I guess that's what I don't know what why. It's like, what is it that I want? Like, what is it that needs to happen? And it needs to be something that I can hold on to and not just like, hey, we know we know it's hard. OK, now, right, right. And what I mean is I'm not. I'm not minimizing their acknowledgement or maybe I am. It's one thing to say, yeah, yeah, yeah, I know there's racism. Anyway, can we can we? OK, let's just keep going for, you know, or yeah, yeah, yeah, there was a pandemic. OK, now we better go back to school. You know, you know, there needs to be a. Put this way again, if it would help you and your your compatriots. Your colleagues to be included in the next year's festivities and activities. Ask for that. I it sounds like it would help. It sounds like you guys are being kind of groomed away, you know. Well, I'm afraid some people just want to stick around. And then, like, I feel like. It's that they're OK to do it without acknowledging that. Oh, like, it's almost indefinite. Some people are just like, oh, yeah, I'll just keep doing this for another six months. But it won't feel official to me. I feel like I need it to be like this is happening. Not like, oh, it just like we just kept going until you were done. Like I need deadlines, too, I guess. But so that's that's that's another thing. I mean, you need it to be official. You need to be officially included. I think they can do that. Maybe they won't be able to offer you the same kind of money or whatever, you know, whatever, but if your project could be officially included and you as an artist could be officially included, whether maybe you don't have to involve your colleagues or whatever, you know, maybe you just do it alone and say, this is what I need to feel like to feel acknowledged as an artist. This is what I need. Yeah. And to have the deadlines and to just be part of the program. I mean, they can include you guys. It's it's not that difficult. Yeah, it's really not. Yeah. Um, you can ask for that and see what they say. I mean, it's great when they say, what do you need? Yeah, sometimes I think, oh, am I just like I I'm waiting for them to like it's not fair for me to expect that they know what I need. Right. But it's almost like I kind of want a little bit of something to go on. Like, oh, maybe we're going to shoot a video of this thing you're doing or like we have money to to do a guess lecture series or something like there's there's no like I need ideas to play off of to or but then maybe that's an opportunity for me to propose things. And I don't know if I I just want to focus on my project. I don't want to do new things. Yeah. But I think you could just focus on asking for specifically what you need. And then if they say, well, you need to come up with some ideas or whatever. What would that look like? Then that's another conversation. But I think it's OK. I think it's great to ask specifically for what you need. Thank you. OK, thank you. Thank you. All right, we've got Marta up next. Why? I just wanted to very briefly thank you, Susan and everyone, because this is my first draft and I finished it today. Thank you. Today you finished it. Fantastic. This afternoon. Yeah. Oh, wow. I didn't. Yeah, thank you. It's I mean, I keep touching it because I don't believe I did this. But but like it exists. So yeah, I'm so great. But thank you so much. A week ago, if this helps anyone like a week ago, I was in a pretty dark place with it and I'd been missing my own deadline, deadlines since March. Like every month, you know, I just wasn't getting there and I was in a rut. Yeah, I talked about it and I asked about it. And like I did miss the July deadline and all this. But but I actually made a calendar for the first time ever a week ago. And somehow I don't know what it was like, but that helped. And yeah, I'm anyway. I'm just trying to live in this moment because it's hard to believe. And like, you know, I don't know what will come of it. I feel like I'm jinxing it by saying it, but it's fine. Like I just, you know, just doing this, I feel is, you know, is something. So thank you, everyone. It's really great, Marta. It's really, really great. I mean, that's right. I remember a week or so ago it was it was in a you were in a very difficult place. You didn't know how to get it done. And you just it looks like it sounds like you just sat down and kept showing up for yourself. Yeah, it's huge. It's huge. And again, like I said to some of the other day, if you jinx it, you'll develop the tools to get out of that problem. You know what I'm saying? If talking about if congratulating yourself after doing hard work is jinxing something, then, uh-oh, you know, we're all in trouble. You know what I'm saying? It's not it's called congratulating yourself for doing hard work. It's great. It's so great. It's I know you say we would like that we would have done it without you anyway, but I would not have done it now. I would not be here now without Watch Me Work. So thanks to everyone. Thank you. That's what that's exactly why we're here. It's exactly why we're here. And what happens, Marta and other folks who have finished projects and started new projects or found ways to keep working when they didn't think they were working. What happens is you're developing a muscle, a skill to keep going. And the next time you're in a difficult place, you might not find the skill quickly, but you have to remember that you have it. And I'm just telling you from my own experience of 40 years of being a creative person and public. You know what I'm saying? So just know that you do have that skill. You can keep going. And the easiest thing to do and the most important thing to do is just keep showing up for yourself, which is what you did. Yeah, it's really a skeleton. Yeah, I was like, there's so much work ahead. But yeah, I mean, yeah, thank you. It's so it's so great. It's so great, Marta. I'm so proud of you. Yeah, thank you so much. We should have a like a dancing, you know, like we should have some music when people finish it. This is good. Oh, look, yeah, I'm a lot of these dancing. Oh, and the rest of you are like, yeah, OK, I don't really dance. I'm just going to sit here with my hands folded. That's OK. Myra, you're up next. I'm sorry, you have to follow our dancing. You know, it's OK. Hi, I'm not I am a writing for pleasure kind of a person. And I am I write a lot of music, but not. And not much else. Well, generally, I'm doing a lot of journal. And I have had an extremely interesting life and and all my friends keep saying, you need to write a book, you need to write a book, you know, it's over and over and over. And and I think, well, you know, most of these comments come up like anecdotally, you know, when when a conversation has brought up something that I've related in my life or something, you know, and I'm thinking, well, I because I thought about this a lot and I'm thinking, well, you know, I I can't imagine writing some kind of a sequential chronicle of my life. And I'm wondering, you know, because I do it on an awful lot of reading, I'm wondering if that is something that could could be done like to just to write. Incidences, they come up and, you know, or as they relate to each other sometime or, you know, like a chain of events. But in the only book that I think I've ever read like that was the Time Traveler's Wife, you know, oh, yeah, you're in there, you know. So I'm just wondering if that's very doable if that sounds like a great idea. That sounds like a great idea, Mara. It sounds like a great idea. I mean, plus, you know, the thing is it gives you the freedom to sort of write on the day, what you feel like writing, you know, you're not you're not sort of chained to the chronology, the sequential thing of a life story memoir kind of thing. But it can you can just have fun with it and just write what moves you. OK, well, that's exactly what I thought I'd start trying to do, because it and that's the way I think about my life, too. Really, just like, you know, I I don't feel like everything has been dependent on some chronological. Uh-huh. I mean, if you want to make a game of it. Because of it, I mean, if you want to make a game of it. So you take like three by five index cards, I don't have any with me right now, but you three by five index cards, right? And you can like cut them in half like the thick way. So they're two little like squares, you know what I'm saying? OK, two little squares and then you like get a whole bunch of them and you can write down little things like, oh, I want to write about the time when we went to Yellowstone and blah, blah, blah, blah, I don't know, your life is so interesting. So you probably Yellowstone is probably a boring part. You know, I was in a blizzard in Yellowstone one time in July. So OK, OK. So yellow being in Yellowstone during July in a blizzard in July, right? So you write that down in a card and you just can think of things like, oh, I mean, so you don't have to write whole pages. You just write these little squares, little tiles, right? Uh-huh. And then if you have a like an empty tote bag that you're particularly fond of, I would not suggest like a plastic bag or a paper bag, but something a little more sturdy that might have to be a fun color or something, right? And you put all these tiles into the tote bag. And then you harness the power of randomness. And when you want to write, you just put your hand in the tote bag and pull one out. Oh, what that might be something for me to do on a daily basis. It could be fun like that. And so then you don't really have to think about what am I going to write? But you just pull it out and go, oh, blizzard Yellowstone July, that can be fun. And then you can just write on it for 20 minutes. And I just wanted to bring up one little thing. I found this great book. One of the things that I do is I buy cartons and I mean, cases and cases of books to give to kids because libraries are closed and, you know, I found this book and it's a by one of my favorite children's authors, Roald Dahl, and it's called Be Outrageous. Big ideas from a small girl is all about writing. And if anybody's having, you know, once a little boost of positive energy, of feeling great and confident about putting yourself in print, this is just a terrific little. I get I sent it to a couple people, a couple young people that had young girls just for like a greeting card. So it's just so great. Anyway, thank you for that. That's really great. If you want to put it in the chat, that would be really cool. So everybody can see the title. OK, I will. OK, that'd be cool. Thanks, Myra. All right, Rebecca, you're next. Hey, Rebecca. Hey, Susan, Laurie, how are you? This is how you doing today? I'm good. I'm good today. How's your beautiful project? It's it's moving along. I am trying to figure out my agent pitch letter. The I was I was advised that I needed to suggest who might endorse my work. So that's, you know, and that's. So but I I'm actually calling about. I love advice on that, actually. But I was also calling about a different piece. And I was hoping you could sort of help me understand. I'm writing a piece about. Diversity practices and businesses. And I'm trying to. So I'm doing an analysis. And in part of my analysis, I use minstrel C and blackface. And I, you know, I listened to Rianna Giddens lecture Carnegie Hall lecture on minstrel C and blackface and realize I'm not a musician. So I'm wondering sort of when you think about. Minstrel C. As a musical form or theatrical form and. Kind of where it sits in. In how you when you're thinking about writing or it comes up as an idea. I don't want to insult musicians. And when I'm I'm just wanting to insult people doing D.E.I. work. Right, right, right, right. And you want to examine. I mean, what do you what publication are you writing it for? Do you have something in mind or I'm trying to think. I'm on my medium side. Yeah. And I'm I'm I'm riffing off of, you know, Audrey's master's tools. And another book of the period called The Feminist Case Against Bureaucracy, which are two books that I love, you know, I love the title of that book. I've read neither one of those books and it just. OK, I'm not a no, but I'm not a the tricky thing. I'm not like a scholar, a literary or art scholar. So I don't really have a formulated opinion on Minstrel C. I mean, I know that when I see it, it always depends on the context. You know, like. Oh, dear, I'm thinking of that Spike Lee movie. Bamboozled, you know, I mean, it always depends on the frame. What how I'm going to receive it, you know, and I haven't I also I'm a big fan of Rihanna Giddens, but I haven't heard that lecture. So I'm not really like as prepped or primed or woke or informed as I could be to answer your question. I guess the larger context is and I hear this from musicians all the time, how no musical form belongs to anyone. But I feel like there are ways that musical forms have evolved to be insulting to the original culture and some of that is appropriation. And some of it is, you know, co-optation and commodification, all those things. And that that's the perspective I'm trying to work from is. So the black musician of the period had to wear a black face to get a job, right? Right. And and the white musician who could, you know, who could like deal with syncopation had to do black face. Right. And so there's this ironic side and then there's this straight up, you know, appropriate side. Right. Right. I mean, yeah, no, no, go ahead. I'm sorry, I cut you off. No, no, no, that's I just I think that one thing that is such a conversation is the harvesting of other cultures. And like I was talking to a friend the other day about, you know, bebop and contra-facts and how bebop musicians took some of the standards and made them into these incredible songs of the bebop canon. But the original predominately white composers were not being harvested from in the same way that they harvested from black culture. And, you know, or even, you know, AP Carter went from house to house and borrow, you know, took, found, wrote songs from the working people that he visited black and white and published them and made money, harvested from those working poor people's communities. So their communities are constantly being harvested from and the communities that are constantly profiting and somehow we have to address that, you know, that one musician, a white musician who can deal with syncopation, as you said, could put on blackface and get a job. But a black musician to get a job had to put on blackface. So that's a huge difference. And we can't just gloss over it and say, everybody borrows from everybody. And no music belongs to one group or what's that? A well-known TV writer. It's America. We all borrow from each other. Sure, we do. But for some reason, there are some groups who continually get harvested from and stolen from. And that needs to be discussed, you know, just on the table, you know what I'm saying? So but I'm not I'm not as up on up up on these these works as as you are. So I wish I could have a more substantive conversation with you about it. That's not that's helpful. Because the point I'm trying to make is diversity and inclusion is not anti-racist organizing. But you can say it is right. Tended is to make money off of it. Right. The person of color doing DEI work is essentially and the white person doing DEI work is that it's like minstrelsy. It can be. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Yeah, definitely. We just have to be super mindful about what it is we're doing because. We're awake now and vocal. And the shit that we're I mean, even like the shit in the 60s that happened, you know, we are talking about it now in a way that we weren't even even 10, 15, 20, 40 years ago. So 80 years ago, 15 years ago. No, I think my work has been so immersed in 19 the 1930s that sort of to be to be writing about like the current time, my friends just say I live in the past and and it's not a very pretty past, but there I am. And so it's I just need to like be sure that I'm that I'm presenting an argument that will incite some intellectual investigation as opposed to and introspection as opposed to just pissing people off. So and I will I know people get pissed off occasionally, but. Well, you can do both. Yeah, and that's kind of fun, but and maybe next week I'll after I work on my my agent pitch a little more this week, I'll have some questions about the whole thing, because it's just a little unnerving. So OK, OK, we'll be here. Thank you. Thank you, Rebecca. All right, we've got Jaden up next. Hey, Jaden. It's Crystal. I'm looking at you like, thank you. You look like Crystal. Why? It's my son. Oh, your son's doing a twist. All right. I had to try a different computer. So, yeah, that's why. So like. So it's a partial it's a partial vent. I'm not sure where the question is going to come in. Exactly. OK. So I've been, you know, with this demigod piece, I have to present it tomorrow. I've done lots of drafts on it. And like I I honestly don't think I can do anything else with it. I don't think there's any more I can do with it. I think I've reached a place of like, this is what I have. You know, take it or leave it and it kind of is that tomorrow. It is a take it or leave it. But I've also been asked to consider writing someone else instead of who I had been working on. Mainly because the person I picked was not a black person. So they want me to pick a black person to write about to. To give the production more more color. And I kind of I. I don't know, I kind of feel limited. I kind of feel kind of pressed against the wall because I'm not really sure that this this particular work that I've put invested in is going to be given the time of day because of the bigger concern of of writing for a person of color and and doing that work, that process all over again. So I'm really nervous. I'm very, very nervous about tomorrow because I didn't know if it was a handout. I didn't know if it was a just a dilemma that was kind of put in my place. I don't know if because my piece didn't meet the meet meet the structure before that, like, I don't know. I feel like maybe I'm the weakest link. So maybe this is your next your chance. Another chance at something else. I just kind of. I kind of feel I don't know how I feel. I kind of feel like I'm supposed to solve a problem when when I came in. I thought I I could just choose anybody I wanted. But maybe it was just assumed that I would pick somebody black because I'm black. So I don't know. I don't know. I kind of I don't I don't know. And I'm often in situations where I'm the, you know, like the only black person. But I know for sure I was picked on picked because I was a black person. And so now I'm like, all right, I thought it was good enough that I was black. I didn't have to pick somebody black, too. I really chose this person because I wanted to to delve into a place where I had to challenge myself as a writer. I had to challenge myself as a Christian. I had to challenge myself as a woman. I had to challenge myself as, you know, well, a humanitarian, you know, like I like that's why I picked this person. No no other reason than that. And they gave me a name of the other person they would like me to consider. And, you know, I get it, you know, I I I get it. But I've kind of lost my zeal. I kind of lost my passion. I kind of feel like deflated, like, you know, I kind of feel like this this skill that I was trying to work on to to write for someone else's structure and design. Now I kind of feel like, well, now who cares like I don't care anymore. And I don't know. I don't know. I don't know what my attitude should be going in tomorrow. And you as a professional who has been in rooms where people have told you things that you've not liked and have had to put the smile on your face. Is this just one of those things where I have to, you know, swallow the the bullet because I feel like someone put a good in my mouth, you know, and just kind of, you know, been, you know, grin and bear it. Wow. Well, I got to say, Crystal, you know, I've known you through this show for a good long while and I'm I'm sorry that you're going through this. And well, none of it's like my fault or our fault. Somebody has to say I'm sorry. And I'll say it because you're a really hardworking person, really hardworking artist and I'm sorry that you're having to go through this. You're Freudian slip when you said, I know I was picked on because I'm black. I mean, picked tells me a lot about what's going on. So it's trick it's tricky. You're inviting, you know, we're often no matter who you are, man, woman, gay person, straight person, whatever your thing, black, white, Asian, whatever. We're invited into places and we think I'm invited in because I'm me. You know, we didn't they didn't tell you that you had to pick a black person. It's very confusing also that you've done all these rewrites and nowhere along the way, even at the beginning, when you chose who you chose, there wasn't a suggestion. Well, well, you know, you know what? We'd really like you, Crystal, to do this person or pick from these four people who are of African descent because we really would like one of those people included, you know what I'm saying? So they could have told you up front, you know, and you could have wrestled with it, you know, but gotten into it to tell you, you know, shortly before you're going to turn in this other this project on this other person is I don't like that for you. I don't think that's the right. I mean, they're they're producers, you said, right? And giving you what you called, I remember because it stuck out a golden opportunity. Remember, you said it that night went OK. So here's here's an opportunity. I mean, so here it is, Crystal. Here's an opportunity that you'd really you really do you still want to be part of it? Does it still feel like this could be fun? This could be cool to get my work included with these this producer and stuff? I don't know. I don't know. I've been wrestling with it all week and even wrestling with it. I don't know if I should say anything to you and and yeah, because it was kind of like all the work, all the all the checking in, the daily checking in and all that, you know, like, and then I kind of thought, well, maybe I'm being silly, like maybe. But I'm like, I don't think I'm pulling the race card here. Girl, that's what I'm here for. You can talk about your work. You could talk about your shit. That's what we're here for. That's why we come together because there's a lot of this kind of stuff going on in the world and your creative life. It's not the race card. It's not the race card when they're telling you at the 11th hour that you should choose a black person, you're not pulling the race card. They are. I mean, they are so that fucking sucks. Now. I have I have a friend who was a student who is from Iran, I think her parents immigrated here, so she's first gen. And she said one day she said, well, I am I only ever going to be writing about Iranian people? She was exhausted by the prospect. And I said, maybe, yeah, maybe, maybe that's all you're going to get hired for, maybe. But you know what? It's OK. It's OK. If you really want this opportunity, right? And it means that you're going to have to choose. Do you like the other person? I mean, that the character. He's he's OK. He's OK. OK, do you have to choose that one? It was strongly suggested because it was it's for an act and a specific actor of color. It gets even crazier, doesn't it? They want to write for a specific actor now. Yeah. And they only know that they only knew that like last week. Yeah, on Saturday. So I'm like, OK, well, let's turn it around. Like, oh, I can write for this actor. And he's he's an excellent actor. He's a well known actor. I'm like, all right, well, maybe this is another opportunity to write for. But in the meanwhile, I kind of feel I kind of feel a little icky. I feel real icky. I felt real icky like last two weeks ago when you told me about it first time. I didn't like how the producer talked to you. I was getting upset for you, but I kept it to myself because you called it a quote golden opportunity. I didn't like how the producer was talking to you. If it still feels like a golden opportunity, this is what I mean about being a pro and getting into the business of creating creating stuff, you know, if it still feels good, then think about whether or not you can do it, you know, with the icky feeling. Because works for hire often feel icky. I'm in the middle of an icky one right now. You know what I mean? Yeah, I mean, I told my friend, I told a friend of mine. She is in a rowboat, a red rowboat with a red megaphone and I am in the water and there is shit in the water as far as you can see and she is shouting at me, swim, swim, swim. And that is what I'm going through on the project that I'm working on. So, you know, you have to think of, you know, if you can think, well, this character might be interesting, this actor, this opportunity might be interesting. I mean, because the alternative is simple. You can walk away. Right. You can walk away. You can. Yeah. And you're going to have to like talk to God, talk to the spirit and say, what should I do? You know, whichever decision you make, it's going to be the right decision for you. OK. Yeah. It hurts for them to suddenly, suddenly fucking find out you're a fucking black person. Well, fuck you, right? Right. I mean, fuck that shit. Sorry to use that language if anybody's offended. You know what I'm saying? Right. It's some bullshit. And who knows? Are you going to own this work that you write? Oh, I don't even know. You know what I'm saying? Are you going to own it or are they going to own it? I don't. I don't know. Because that's what I want to know. Because if you can write the piece and own it and it belongs to you, you have copyright to it. Then I say it's worth it. You know, because basically you're getting paid to write something. If they're going to own it, then, you know, you got to talk to God about it. I'm not sure. I'm not sure. OK. OK. But when you decide it's going to be the right decision. Whatever I decide. OK, that is going to be the right decision. OK. OK. Yeah. And you can say and you know what? Fuck it. You can say yes tomorrow and no on Tuesday. You know what I'm saying, Crystal? Yeah. Sure. I'll do it. Sure. Here I'm into it and you can change your mind on Tuesday and say, you know what I've changed my mind? Yeah. Yeah. Yeah. If you want to be if you want to get black about it, you know what I'm saying? Yeah. Yeah. You know, I can laugh and you know what I'm talking about. No, man, I'm into it. Yeah. OK. I'll do it and then say yes. Then think about it a little bit longer. You'll buy yourself some time and check back in next week and see how you're feeling about it. OK. And if you decide, you know what? I actually don't want to do this. Then you can let it go. OK. You see what I mean? Yeah, I do. I do. I do. I also have to trust that if something like this, this opportunity, golden opportunity came that another one will come. And if it's an historical character, is this new person an historical character? Oh, you know what? You can write about them if you want on your own. Oh. If I'm interested, yeah. You know, on your own, you can write about them. Right. Mm hmm. Yeah. Yeah. OK. OK, thank you. OK, sister. Great question. That was a heavy one. Lord, I must make you want to slap somebody. Not you, though, never you, Crystal. Thanks for the question. Thank you, Crystal. I didn't want to interrupt. You're amazing. No, no. Thank you. Thank you. So this is our final session of the week. We'll be back Tuesday to Thursday next week. OK. Yeah. Love you guys. Have a good weekend. I hope you're the best. OK, you guys are. Thanks, Audrey. Muah, muah, bye.