 Greetings, everyone. This is James P. Madonna of Megalife 21 and Progressive Discussions. And before I go on to do my next video talk show, I am stopping by from my immediate area off Route 17 South in Hasbrook Heights, New Jersey, the one and only, the famous Bendick Steiner as seen on the Jerry Seinfeld Netflix series, Comedians in Cars Getting Coffee. That's right. It is in my close area and I love it here. Outstanding food, outstanding coffee, and I will go in soon before I go on to do my next show. Maniacal Sunday Madness. I officially salute maniacal Sunday Madness because I guess we just walked in. Oh, you were telling me about yesterday. I had some issues with my custom made computer and I had to bring it in to my brother-in-law in Elmwood Park to have him look at it. So I always have a great time at my brother-in-law's house as opposed to getting upset when I'm here. You know what I mean. How about you? Anything exciting happen to you Saturday? No, I just had to go to Macy's to get a different gift card. You know what I don't like about gift cards? There's one thing about gift cards that are scams. If you read the fine print, they actually have an expiration date. Well, you read the back of it. When's the expiration date? I don't know, but I got screwed with my gift cards. Macy's has an expiration date under a gift card? I don't know about Macy's, but other companies do. So you better look. That's a scam, you know why? There was no expiration date, Jimmy. But do you know why it's a scam? Because people are putting up money to buy the gift card. It's a gift of cash value. So why is there an expiration date on a gift card? I guess I better use it pretty soon. I guess you better get a magnifying glass and read the fine print. My eyesight's not good and I don't have a magnifying glass. Go to a dollar store and get one like I do. Or you can use your phone. Right now. Listen, Eileen, you can use your smartphone. Put it on video and go like this with your fingers. Spread your fingers. You don't know how to do it. I was going to teach you some things, but you won't let me teach you. I'm not going to wait for you to teach me. In other words, there's a shopping list. I mean, there's a memo pad where you can put down what you know. Look at it right here and see if there's an expiration date. I can't read that, man. But you were reading glasses, too. I can't read that. Let me see. Let me tell you right now. This card, I can read this now. Hold on. Beep-a, complete this card. Beep-a-blah. Gift card balance. You know what? I think the woman might be right. I don't see an expiration date. She is right, right? I think she's right. She's right, yeah. Because my gift card had an expiration date, which is really not fair. Is that what you're telling me, Jimmy Ray? I can't see an expiration date, Eileen. So there is no expiration date, right? You're expired. Shut up. There is no expiration date, Jimmy Ray? Yes, there is. How many times are you going to say it? Oh, she won't stop. It's going to be all day. What did you all do yesterday? I had to bring my computer to my brother-in-law's. I've been told you weren't here before. No, I had issues on my computer. My brother-in-law had to look at it. The guy that you said built a crap computer? No, no, actually he built me... This is a new one. This is not crap. You said the other was crap? No, the other one collected a lot of dust. I'd sue him. Yeah. No, this time... I'd sue her. This time, I'd give him two thumbs up, like Siskel and Ebrie used to when they were alive. Oh, just like them? Oh, boy, did you hear that? That means they got paid off when they give two thumbs up. Probably. You all are going to talk a lot, aren't you? Uh... Not only does William H... He's wound up, I know it. Not only does William H. Morrill want to be alone, but he doesn't even care if he dies alone, I bet. Well, does it matter when you're dying? Everybody, I said that too, says you're right. It just doesn't matter. Well, people get depressed when they know they're going to die alone, you know. Does it matter? Well, you're dead. Yeah, exactly. Death is death. Does it matter? There is no death. You're wrong. You saw me use the amulet on that. No, but people that want to be alone are usually those like the one, like the unabomber, like the whack jobs... No. ...want to be alone. There are sometimes people that have grown up and never had privacy, because people are bothering them all the damn time, and they get fed up and want a little privacy for change. You know what? You're here, you're a form of entertainment. Oh, Jesus. Being that this guy is really, is not too crazy about people being around him. If it wasn't for you, I would have absolutely no entertainment. No, you wouldn't. That's a case closed. We'd be talking football and interesting things. Oh, okay. Not foods, recipes, you know. You sound like Rick Brown. He's not into recipes and food either. Like, we sit over here and we talk. He just wants to make money. Shh. Like a Jew. We sit over there and we talk about the world's issues and problems of history. Because Mike and all the other guys love history. We talk history. What happened? What's applied? What have we learned? Sure beats hearing about food. Hey, that's why we're just three networks on cable dedicated to fine cuisine. If food was boring, why would there be three networks? Oh, okay. Hotshot. So what is their percentage of viewership ratings compared to other channels on cable? Food network, travel channel. They're not that big. It's the other one. No. Food channel. And what was it today? Somebody said on TV exactly what I've been saying. God, what was it? I said, yes. I can't remember. One of them was, can you get to your point? I forget what that was. Something else on this part of the news. That'll come back. Yeah. You know, there's a new... I shouldn't even say thank you. There's a new scan with online purchasing. There's a new scan for everything. You know, when you buy something online, let's say Amazon, and you buy a month's supply of something, and the transaction goes through. Let them take all the money. No, you know what they do? Let them take it. I don't care. Billy, you know what they do without your authorization? They keep taking. They put you on an automatic renewal plan. That's what you get for going online, which I don't believe in as you know. So there, suffer the consequences. I told you hotshot. You don't want to listen. So suffer. End of argument. So you think going to some retail store, opening the door and entering, and paying top... I believe in getting off your fact. And paying top dollar. And walking to some crook. Oh, so you're going to do it online and give it to another crook? No, you save money. You get huge discounts online. Huge discounts. Give me your Amazon Prime. Please, I've got my moron friend, Joe Drives, all the way down here to Costco where they save a few cents on gases. You've only got 12 gallons in your car. Even if you save 10 cents, it's a dollar, goddamn 20. Joe's not the BS. Well, that's penny-wise in pound food. Thank you. Thank you. I mean, but when you're really saving money... You're not saving that much money. And who cares? You know, but to put somebody on automatic purchasing without their authorization, that's underhanded. And that's American capital. No, I think that's good. Do it. That's American capital. Take their money, turn the screws on their ass. Teach them a lesson. I'm all for the teaching of lessons. Our revolution led by Bernie Sanders, we're going to kick these demons capitalists right out of office. Which is his way of saying, we're screwed, nothing is going to happen. That's his way of saying that. Well, if they expose that the election is being rigged, then the people would know it. Now, nothing to do with Bernie Sanders His candidates are on a big roll right now. You guys are going nowhere. Oh, then we had the great Tea Party, which did what? Oh, that's right. Tea Party? Nothing. Those inbred racists? No, no, today's Tea Party. Those inbred racists? See, inbred racists, he's a socialist. You all messed up, I'm telling you. Let me tell you, you know that the whole concept of buying low and selling high is anti-biblical, is of the devil? Whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa, whoa. It's of Satan. No, no, it's not. I read it in the Bible. Don't quote anything about religion to me. It's all a crock of shit. What is religion? Religion. You better hope that God doesn't bitch slap you when you pass on it. There is no God. How many do that? He might take your soul and just bitch slap you. There is no God. Okay. Well, the aliens might. Don't push God in my face. I'm not pushing him. There is no God. Stop it. But I'm saying, you know, like she says, like Eileen says, Billy, Billy, watch out. Be careful. I'm going to watch both of you flying by with your little wing. Playing harps, right? Oh, I don't know. You'd be harped. He'd show the clown, though. He was all bravo. I'll be Chico. And she'll be... The man. No. Chico and the man. Zepo. Zepo. She'd be Zepo. He was Gummo. I never seen Gummo. She was the one in the pot with shrimp. That was Gummo? Oh, that's Gummo. That's pretty good. You see? He tells cheesy jokes and I laugh. See, I give him... I know. What the heck was that? What is Gummo? You don't know, do you? What is Gummo? You know, that's a good question. What is Gummo? A little flexible green guy and he's a sidekick horse. They put... Let me give you a hint. They put okra in it. They put what? Okra. She's a host of that talk show. Okra Win 3. Okra Win 3? No. Yes, they do. No. Yes, they do, Eileen. Oh, my God. They put Okra Win 3 in there. Yes, Eileen. This is too good to be true. No. That's Okra Win 3. No, it's not. He's lying. It's Okra Win 3. He's talking about a slimy vegetable called Okra. That's her. She's a slimy vegetable. Her name is Okra Win 3. Ok? Yeah, they put it in Gummo. Yeah. Gumby has that little friend horse that's flexible too. Pokey. Yeah. Gumbo and Pokey. You don't even know... You don't even know... No, they're... Clay animals. Clay animals? No. They're not clay animals. Yes, they are. Yeah, ok. Yes, they are. You remember the old show with Burl Ives, the Christmas show? You know where we were hookers? She was always out in the street. She was playing down the street. You watched it through, weren't you? No, a kid playing on the street. How much did you charge back then? Did you play hopscotch with Ray? I had no idea. You know hopscotch, that stupid game with the chalk? They got right to the point. We played. We played. We played. What's that? Oh, you did know Ray back then? What's that? What's that game? Shuffleboard? Shuffleboard, yeah. We played a lot of games. On the streets? No, we went on vacation. No, I mean, your regular life. Like, you didn't watch television as a child? Not much. You don't know romper room and Officer Joe Bolton and Captain Kangaroo? You don't... Oh, I didn't like any of those. Soupy sales? Yeah, but he was funny. I don't know. Soupy, when he told everybody to send me all the money? I was jumping rope. That was funny, so. Jumping rope. Wait a minute. You were jumping rope that long? Out on the street. You should have hung yourself. Out on the street and playing games, you know. You're saying you know. Well, I was outside too, Eileen, but not at night. With who this time? With myself. Wait, what time did you go to bed? I think about seven or eight o'clock. Well, you're not cool. You're not cool. At least we like the nightlife. Like the boogie, like the disco. Yeah, like the song, you know. You're wound up there, aren't you? Is the caffeine getting you? You know, people, nocturnal people are... Is the caffeine getting you? Nocturnal... I don't want to hear her talk cool. ...are cool. Nocturnal people are cool. They play pause. People that get up at the crack of dawn are not cool. They're stuff shirts. Right. They're stuffy. All right, go ahead and talk. What do you do? You sit there. You don't have a TV or nothing? You stare at the wall? I can't have the TV on. I'm from a complex. You can't make noise out of that. Oh, Jesus Christ. My TV's always on. My TV's always on. What are you talking about? What do you mean, you know? How big is your complex? 124 tenants. We're 156. You don't have the right to watch television at night. What are you, for real? Well, turn it down. Damn. Turn the volume down. Nobody said to blast it. I said, do you watch TV? That was a simple question. You better marry this Uncle Bob or whoever. Oh, by the way, have you cleaned out your purse yet? No. Of course not. I've got more stuff in it. I got more. Oh, my gosh. Now the part was defective that the mechanic gave me four weeks ago and now it's acting up again. What does that have to do with you being a whore? It's coming on again. So I've got to bring it back to us. Which mechanic? Not the one that quoted you $800. No, the $50. I paid for a defective part and now I've got to have him give me a new part to track it. Oh, the guy that screwed you gave you a defective part. Yeah, now I've got to get a working part. Notice how she got up the subject of her hoarding? Nobody's true. I've got to get a working part now. She's slicker than we think. Well, she's not. The guy sitting here just saying, what the fuck is going on? Yeah, you're right about that. Well, the most refreshing time is when Kathy, Karen, come side, when Karen sits down with her food and tells you where she's going to go eat. That's kind of like a little vacation. Listen, what is in your purse is probably 99.9% garbage. I just have to put my registration. She changed the subject. No, but he said what is in your purse makes it so heavy for you, sir. A lot of it was expired coupons, sir. How many? How many? One. One. I threw them away one. Oh, my God. That's why it's still full of garbage. You're a hoarder. The ambulance said that. You know, a stand-up comic quoted a scene from Moonstruck with Cher and Nicholas Cage. Okay. The best advice a psychologist can give is this. Snap out of it, man. Remember when Cher told Nicholas Cage to snap out of it? Unbelievable. Excuse me. I got to get it. I got to get it. It's my cup that's leaking. You already look so thin, Bill, like you're in California. Yeah, I do. I guess I don't know why. I'm so pale, Bill. Well, we'll call you Casper. Casper the ghost. Casper the friendly ghost. The friendliest ghost you know. Ghosts must become popular, Bill. Who they are. The coffee leak comes right through the scene. I'm cleaning my teeth at what? No, it's just a part in there. Oh, Jesus. What a lovely... No wonder dentists have psychological issues. They got to look into people's mouths and... not every mouth is a pretty sight. So the dentists choose to... Hygienists? The regular dentists and phyllis from cavities. You know, I got to give you credit. Your teeth are very straight and you have a full mouth of them. They're fake. They're all fake. I know people like you. Hey, wait a minute. They're not as yellow as they used to be. You're using ultra bright, I bet. They're talking. They're fake, aren't they? They're not fake. Yeah, they are. They're real. No, they're not. I've seen you cry. They're fake teeth. Look, everybody. Come over here. Choppers. No, they're not. They're somebody else's. Some are root canal. No, they're fake. With crown? With crown? What? Root canal with crown, right? I guess the crowns... No, they're just root canals. No, the caps. They capped it? They put a cap. Well, that's the crown. That's just what they call it. The cap. They call it crown. I watched... The Orioles are playing Boston right now. Do you have root canal, Jimmy? I have a couple, yeah. With crown, yeah. Lucky you only have two. I got more than that, Jimmy. No, I had two molars pulled because I couldn't afford... You know, nobody wants to pay for dental care anymore. Even my sister who has a good job has shitty dental coverage. Medicare doesn't like to pay at all for dental. Uh-huh. Yeah. I'm only missing one, Jimmy. Thank you. I had a couple wisdom teeth, only. Oh, my God. I only had one wisdom tooth. Oh, my God. Oh, boy. How was today? See, I leave those papers everybody reads in the morning. Got them going? What? Oh, I was dodging floods coming home. I was stuck in it. Not stuck, but... Yeah. How about those? Oh, little falls. I talked to my friend on the phone. I saw videos of that. Yeah. I was coming down Arnott Street from Westminster and Lowe. And there was a river coming down Arnott. And every intersection had a little baby flood, like a lake. Oh. And I had a dodge, you know, going to shallow water to get home. The street next to me on Central Avenue. The water was up to the front. Were you on Lowe's Island? No. Oh, it has to be Kite. Oh, you're on... I'm off Central and on the Lowe's Island. Oh, okay. You're not far from me. You're probably near Woodside. Actually, when I vote, I go vote in Hilltop School. That's where I have to go vote. That's right. You vote. You vote a lot. You really should. You really should. Why not? What? You don't know who to vote for. You vote for whoever is making your life better. If somebody's not making your life better. Well, that's what you're gonna vote for. Yeah. Go on. You know how really? They're some right party people. It's like those people in Wolf County, Kentucky, that live in shacks, right? And they're like, they keep on voting for those that only work for the top 2% of the population. Rural, leave them in the shack. You know, and they stay and they live in the shack. Leave them in the shack. I would take the way they write the voting. I remember Love Shack by the B-52s. No voting. Remember Love Shack, I think? No. The song. I remember Rock Lobster. You know what? I think that brain cell deficient people and ugly people should be taxed if they reproduce. They should be heavily taxed. I don't think women should be allowed to vote. I think women should be, instead of doing jury duty, they should be allowed to vote. I think women should be allowed to vote. They should be milked. Just the votes should not be out. Yeah. You think they should be milked? And what's next? Women are going to want the same pay for the same work as a man? Come on, give me a break. Equal pay for women? Equality. How can there be equality with feminists if with you date them, they expect the guy to pick up the tab? So where's the equality? I don't see how many bad guys are on their work. Oh, God. Some guys pay for dinner and drinks and don't even get sex? Ever, ever. You've got a sick mind for dating theories. No, if you pay, you should get something. You are sick. To get nothing is being a jerk off. You are sick. You ever hear of a fool? Yes, a fool for expecting something when you ask a girl out on a date. Then why are you paying? Because you asked her out on a date. You know what? Why are you so nervous? Why are you doing this? You're like one of those evil guys who are these... Aighead. I'm Batman. Yeah, what's with that fans? You're absolutely right. The person who invites in our society should pay. I do agree with him on that. Oh, Jesus. There's Jimmy. My friends Jimmy Madonna have weird... No, it's called being a smart... Can you stop talking for a moment? Does my friends Jimmy Madonna have weird dating street dogs? It's called being streets... No, it's not. It's not called that at all. It's called cheap. Yeah, cheap. Does my friends Jimmy Madonna have strange dating ideas? No, it's called common sense. Does Jimmy Madonna, when it comes to dating, have common sense? So, why do girls lobster tail and filet mignon and an apple martini and she scams you and she does it to another guy? Well, Jimmy, they may ask you one thing. You're saying that. Why don't I agree with them? What about Dutch? What about going Dutch? You ever hear that? I don't agree with that either. You don't like my style? Okay, okay. That's my point. So, you know, you're cheap. I'm not. I take a girl I pay for it. Right. And I expect nothing. Because you're inviting her. That's why. You're just the opposite. You're saying you're inviting her. That's sick. Listen, listen. I dated a girl who passed a bar exam in Lisa Cohen. She passed a bar exam in both New York State and New Jersey and she insisted on paying the tip and for her dinner. She was the one who was probably indicted. No, she wasn't indicted. She was Cohen. Come on. No, she worked for Bear Stearns when they went belly up. I'll bet. Come on. No. So, you pick up the tab and you expect absolutely nothing. Naturally, because you invited her. That's only customary. Yeah, but it's a sad thing. What are you going now? I'm going to go for that. And you get scared. You know how many no-good son-of-a-bitch scammers are in our society? You know how many... You know how I wish an asteroid... I'm talking to her. Oh, I'm sorry. You know how... You know how I wish an asteroid hits a stinking planet? Society, human race is so selfish and vile. But you're a nervous wrecker. I want you doing this. You're all over it. You're like an Andrew Anderson. You like to get on the James P. Madonna skin. You don't stop. I did. Lobster rolls. I wonder if they still have them. Oh, yeah, I love them. Who's doing it? You know what? Oh, speaking of your legs. Your scratches are going away. Yeah. And I hope you get new screen for your razor. I went there and they didn't have it. Oh, we know. We know. You told us they didn't have it. We know. I went to Salo Book today and I went to Target and they didn't have it on the manufacturer. Well, you're just going to have to stop. And you're going to have to stop and just have hairy legs. Why don't you use a blade? A razor blade? And a shower. Her with a sharp object? Are you crazy? Yeah, you do it in a shower. No, I lean with a sharp object with killers. Oh. Now the whole world knows you take a shower. That's pretty good. Well, I should... We assume that people wash themselves. We assume wrong. They won't have good hygiene at all. You know what amazed me? When I worked in the Vitamix shop, there was a... You know, your Vitamix shop was about to go out of business. There was a 22-year-old, You know that? A very pretty girl. Oh, not hearing a word. Yeah. That one is going out of business? The whole company was about to go out of business then. Yeah. The vitamin world and whatever. They're hoping to bond together and stay in business. Because of that scumbag. Well, I think because a lot of people are running on this Vitamix. What's your shit? People don't want to... You notice, you hear nothing about ginseng, that all great thing, everything anymore. You hear nothing about eating anymore. Well, I wouldn't... You hear nothing about ginko chipolo anymore. I wouldn't... You know what? I wouldn't put down nutritional supplements because that would make you a jackass. Well, people bought into that crap and they found it didn't do jack shit. If you put down all supplements, I'm sorry, sir. I'm sorry. What works? What works? The real thing? Echinacea, they found out it boosts your immune system. They found out it does zero. You know who found out? Yeah. The drug companies. Your greedy corporate friends. No, no, no, no. Don't do this to me and give me that shit. No, you're wrong. You're wrong. I don't point in people's faces. It wasn't drug companies at all. Don't give me that shit. I gotta go to the bathroom. Again, leave your purse. I want to go through it. You know how much lion propaganda is in this stinking capitalist country? Leave it. I'm gonna take the thing out of it. Wait a minute. Oh, we're gonna... Leave it. Oh, we're gonna get gold bars and leave your purse. I gotta get my brush to comb my hair. Then you get the brush out right now and leave the purse. Look, she's taking that garbage with her. We're following you. Oh, my God. Oh, help me. She's taking that hunk of junk with her. Now, this vitamin they found is all a bunch of shit for the most part. Oh, they found a whole bunch of companies putting out fraud. It's all junk. You think I'm in favor of fraud? Yeah, but how do you... I wonder if I told you all along. How do you know what you're buying? The average person doesn't buy it. I don't take it to a lab, so, you know... Yeah, how do you... You don't know what you're buying either. Nobody knows. It's scam. Nobody knows. But I'm not... I'm not gonna, like, put down all herbs and all vitamins. Well, who are you? Why not? Because the real... the case studies have been done on the real thing. Case studies have been done through the wrong, too. Other case studies. My major university's, too. Now, major... Like Tufts University, let's say. Duke University, the whole bit. They've all done 10-year studies and plus. Well, they... them, I respect. Well, though, when they say it's all about what word of crap. But not when Merck or Hoffman La Roche does the study. That's biased. But we're not talking about the companies and pharmacies. College, universities. They found it, all this stuff. It's useless. Remember the stupid books? Sharks don't get cancer. Then they find out they do get cancer. They do get cancer. So what's all the BS going in the lies? Glucosamine for the osteoarthritis. My friend who lives next door neighbor was already created melatonin, wrote all the books. And he said, it's a load of bullshit I created. It doesn't do a damn thing. It's like placebo. Yes. He said it does nothing. Well, that's why they call it double-blind placebo studies. What about the other neighbor that created that vial with dirt from the Holy Land? There you go. Listen, there are... So what you're saying is people that look young for their age and most likely... No, what I'm saying a lot of this is what goes around, vitamin shop and other vitamin stores got a wayward for a while. Sooner or later it's going to catch up to you and you're going to fall. Fail. Fall and fail. Well, if you're unethical it's going to bite you on the ass. Yeah, you're selling a... cheap goods, junk. Ginko. Ho-ho-ba. What ever happened to Ho-ho-ba? Ho-ho-ba where? Ho-ho-ba where? That's gone. Ginko-baloba. Ginko-baloba is gone. The Ginko-baloba tree is the oldest living thing on the planet. It doesn't matter. 1,000 years. I don't care. It doesn't do a thing. It's a memory. It's... No, it's supposed to increase circulation to the extremities. It didn't do a thing. The brain erectile dysfunction. It didn't do a thing. No. What did do a thing? What? The drug company. Oh, here we go. Corporatism. Here we go. Money market. Hey, hot shot. Shut up for a minute. You're going to tell me Viagra doesn't work? It works, but I'm sure there's negative side effects to it. What? What did he say? Oh, by the way, I know anabox steroids definitely work. No, they don't. They don't give you a direction. No, no, I mean muscle mass. Why are you getting on the subject? No, there are some drugs that I do give kudos to. Yeah. Some drugs. Yeah. Like the one... Viagra? Yeah. Immunotherapy drugs. The first one was the other. Not Viagra, but the... Cialis. Cialis was the one in the middle. The L. Forget the name of it. They work. Immunotherapy drugs work, but they have... Of course they have side effects. Yeah, it's all this herbal... It's just bullshit. You know, you know how much markup a drug company makes on an important drug? Yeah. An astronomical... We're not talking about that sad, that's why we're always sick. We're talking about work for works and what doesn't work. Okay. Not the money, the markup or whatever. No, that's bullshit. And I agree with the government getting in telling some of them Oh, my God. Heck yeah. The HIV drug that he was making a killing on. Well, I know... I know an oncologist. Filler, stems and twigs. I know when an alternative oncologist has an outstanding rating of success, but he knows what he's doing. He comes from an MD background. Well, one of mine is one of the best. It's from the Mortar Sloan Catering. Yeah. Now it's over here at Holy Name. Well, look at the beauty of the immunotherapy procedure. People are getting off the chemo. And who does that? America's Biopharmaceutical Company. Right. Now let's see what if any dirt comes up on them in the future. It might. It might not. Or it might not. But if they're not too much pumping stupid vitamins in them, we're starting to go down there. Yeah. Sitting there and here's a few... Well, Linus Pauling's intravenous megavitamin C does work. Like somebody had hepatitis C got bombed it right out of a system. One person. You know... One person. Come on. One person. It does boost your immune system. It works for one person. You just don't know. Well, I'm all for honest companies. I don't care how big they are or how small they are. They're honest. Well, how do you know who's honest? How do you determine who's honest? Well, eventually karma... They bite you. But in the meantime, you're hurting people. Come on, man. People can't wait for this. No. You know, down the road, they'll find out. In the meantime, hundreds of thousands have died. Come on. People need help right away. People need help right away. People need help right away. People need help right away. People that are terminally ill or seriously in need help right away. That's why the biopharmaceutical companies, not the vitamin companies, have them in for trial tests. Like an experimental lab rat. That's worth a shot to try. They're trying. They're trying. Right. And look at the charities that do help, like St. Jude Children's Hospital, as opposed to the scammers that have a CEO making two million... American Red Cross has a CEO making two million dollars a year and one. You're bringing everything to money. I'm talking about what works and what doesn't work. And they scam you with things that don't work. So Eileen, seriously. Eileen doesn't work. Seriously. Horting makes no sense. How'd you get off of that now? Because it bothers me that somebody would hoard. Well, you weren't even near. Oh, I thought we came to the conclusion about... But how did you get back on hoarding all of a sudden? Because I thought we... I think he's obsessed with your work. No. I thought that we have addressed the issue. No. I think he's obsessed with your hoarding. Are you obsessed with your hoarding? No. It's illogical. It doesn't make sense. Well, the hoarding never does make sense. Mr. Leonard Nimoy would say it's very illogical. No, he wouldn't. That would be his character, Spock. Spock. He wouldn't be Leonard Nimoy. Science officer, Spock. No, it's not. I just want you to change. But you did do something that made a lot of sense. You didn't go back to the crooked mechanic and you went to... Pat Boyd's. Pat Boyd's. So I'm proud of you about that. I'm not proud of you. I think you suck. Well, she made a good consumer decision. Fuck you, Arlene. No, you suck. I don't care about your goddamn pit boys or anything. Fuck you. Blow it out your ass. What's that, Manny Moe and Schmuck? What were their names? Manny Moe and Schmuck. It just doesn't matter. It's like Bob's furniture. He's using the little animation with a big head. Well, sometimes food is interesting, like when we talked about the river walk in San Antonio. It was very brief. You notice I didn't have a car for it. I said, oh, so you went to the river walk? It was a little great band. Oh, by the way, speak to the point and out. Speaking of sports, I like the Orioles uniform with the black with the orange lettering. I think it's very sharp. Everybody, the Orioles have more uniforms than any other team. You sure? No, but they were playing Boston yesterday to have black with orange lettering. It had that Halloween look to it. It really stood out. Everybody sucks, you say, though. Don't fuck about it. Do an FTW, all right? Yeah, blow it out your ass. I'll see you back there. Open a treat, Tom. You can fart and play around the room. I'm gonna say hi, Ali. It's all you know. You know, when it rains, the robins, I guess the microbes and the worms come to the surface. And the robins have a tugging match pulling the nightcrawler out of the ground. Looks like a cartoon. Didn't they think it had so much rock and robin? Oh, been a treat, Tom. Oh, fuck you. You ever watch a robin pull a worm out of the ground? No. Nature is fascinating. Too bad you're boring talking about this stuff. No, but if I talk about martinis and football, of course that's okay. Well, they are. You're talking about robins and worms. Come on, man, Jesus. But it's nature. It's nature. So what? So what? You know, it'd be funny if the aliens landed and they came in and said, we want to have a talk with William. Hey, William. We're aliens, but we know English. This is going to be stupid. We don't like the fact that you disrespect nature and animals and everything. You know what? No, wait a minute. We're going to stun you. You see how you lie? We're going to stun you. See how you lie? Nobody said anything about disrespecting. You twist your feeble mind. Rock and robin. Say I disrespect it. I never said I love nature probably more than you ever will. I just didn't want to hear about it. Oh, okay. And why do you twist it and say disrespect? Because I watched the robin pulling the worm. Why did you twist it around? Don't change the subject. Well, you dissed it. I didn't want to hear about it. Oh, okay. That's all. It doesn't mean disrespect. You see how people are bad witnesses to everything crimes and this? They change things a little. They disrespect it. He never said he disrespected it. Why did you say that? That's what lawyers go after. Every word. Every word counts. Right. You know what I say, Ali? Fuck them all. But the robin pulling the worm out was a short, a short couple of sentences and I stopped. Thank God because I got on you and said stop. No, no. There was no more. There was no more to say. What's that tell you about the subject? What's that? There's really nothing more to say. You're right. What's that say about the subject? Like what Eileen did. Going to Pep Boys. That one. Right to the point. But Jimmy's got to go back to it. See? You know what? If I didn't go to Pep Boys, I'd be borrowing money from somebody and my checking account would be all empty now. Your brother. Fuck them all. Go back when they're closed, break in and steal their money. So screw. Still whose money? Pep Boys. You know, you won't let me show you the tricks on how to use your phone because you're afraid I might take it. Is that why? No. I just don't know how to work that phone, Jimmy. And why do you have it? I have it just to make calls and just to text. I'm not afraid of anybody stealing my phone. I would never take your phone. I know you wouldn't steal it. I would never steal it if you weren't. I'd tell these strangers that I would steal it. No, no, no, no. You bring it out. I'm going to steal it. Yeah, but I'll take it. But you see what happened at that time? You had to run home to get a phone call and you never got it. I'll steal the damn thing. Rock and rob and tweet. Will you leave that there? We're going to tweet. Rock and rob and tweet. I'll steal your just for spite. I'll do it just to bother you. Rock and rob and tweet. I'm taking your phone. I'll say Karen, don't you tell her. I'm taking that phone. I've seen a Eileen. You want me to do an Irish jig while singing rock and roll? Yes, yes. No, no, no. I'm only kidding. Everybody, come here, Jimmy, to the dance. Come here. Go ahead, Jimmy. Let's see. Yeah, like when the girl came in, you said, what are you going to do? Dance for her? Go ahead. You said you'd do it for Eileen. Why did you ask her? You want me to do an Irish jig dance? Then do it. Yes, I do want to see it. No, I wanted to get her to laugh. No, go on. Well, do it then. Make her laugh. Come on, hot shot. Then you're going to get all like it. You're going to sit and watch. You go right ahead. Let me see. Go ahead, hot shot. You better do it now with nobody here. When they're here, I'm going to push you out on the damn floor. Say, dance. We'll watch this here. All this is going to be grand. Watch the foot action. You know who you're going to look like? I know before you're going to do it by your stance. No, by your stance, you're going to look like Jed Klamper. Go ahead. Embarrass yourself. It's a Klamper. Open the tree top. All the way along. Rock and roll. That's pretty sick. Do you know how fucking fast that was? It was stupid. You call that dancing? No. That was just doing a crazy ass, like a drunken leprechaun. You call that dancing? That wasn't professional dancing. You can't do professional dancing. I know salsa, merengue, and disco. No, you don't. I did it many times. No, you haven't. Professional ballroom dancing. No, you haven't. My uncle was the teacher. That doesn't matter. You don't know it. That was just for comedy purposes. You used to do real dancing. You don't know it. Sometimes you have to have a dance partner to do it. Sometimes you don't. Let me see you get up and do it. He does. He's professional. Let me see you get up and do it. Let me tell you something. You know what happened if I leaned up against the bar at Gabriel's and got a beer and a girl was talking to me? He'd do an Andrew Anderson to me. He embarrassed me to the point where I'd walk out and say, you know what? I'm not coming here anymore. Goodbye. Have a good evening. Down in T. You know what we used to call that in the old days? Cock block. No. That's cock block. No. It's when a dude wants all the women for himself. It's called saving the girl. Because you and my friend had a lot of problems. It's called a guy getting all the women for himself. So he'll put down his male compadres. No. Gotcha. I know humans psychology. Remember when I told you to stop touching the girl so much? Touch? Touch? That's a blatant lie. Joanne of the South Korean girl, you're all over it. She was like, keep it like this. I never touched her. I don't touch people. I don't touch people. I don't know. Should I ask? Are you serious? That's a blatant lie. No, you're blatant lie. Touching. Touching. I don't bother with the girls. Touching the public? Not the public here, but you did with her. Never touched. Never touched. That's a blatant lie. How do you want to ask? Only perverts do that. I would never touch. Now, you know what? I wish to fucking God, the girl that I would have gotten rescued and went to San Diego. I wish to Christ I would have got away from the sticking area. Him, Reverend Bill, the guy who died, I swear, if I did a eulogy for him, he was a selfish, grouchy, old, jealous motherfucker. And so is Andrew Anderson. And so is a lot of people I know that I grew up. I know many people from this area that are selfish motherfuckers. Now, are you done? Yes, I'm done. Never touched strangers. All right, go ahead. You got to give it a rest. I never touched strangers. You didn't want to fight in front of me with Joanna? Touch? Touch? Yeah, you kept sitting, she great, and she wonderful. I never put my arm around her. When we met Joanna, the South Korean girl, years ago in front of a Bar-to-Noble in Paris, it's a beautiful South Korean girl. And Jimmy, putting his arm around her would have been too much. That's a goddamn lie. I never touched her. Jimmy, I saw you do it. Put my arm around her? Isn't she great? I never touched her. I might have said. And you never followed that girl when I yelled at you and said, get over here. You can't do this. Well, but I never touched people. But you can't follow them either. See, you can't add things to it. You got to tell it like it is. Follows one thing. But touching is a whole other... You didn't do that. You know what? Why didn't you question it then? I was supposed to make sure I heard it right. Damn it. I got it. I got it. You just now got it? Yeah. How do you too slow? You too are slow. Get married. Well, get married. Yeah, but insulting God and Rickless jokes towards me, it takes a little longer for me to get married. It sure does. Because I don't particularly like them. They're not accolades. You know, accolades are funny words. Go garbage out. No, I want Jimmy to stay here. Oh, God. You all just get it. Oh, yeah. I just got it. Let me just suck. Let me just suck up those insult jokes. I got it. Why? You question everything and that drives me nuts. Stop it. I'm not going to tell you anymore. You know what? She doesn't have to agree to James P. Madonna insult jokes. She can say, well, I don't really want to laugh at that. These two Karen are in love with each other. They are. No, because it's like... They are. They are. I'm just trying to figure out. You know what I wish I had? Just getting like Charlottes? I wish they had a recharge. She's skinny like Charlottes? Yeah. What does that mean? Who is this girl coming in? Yeah, but she's very... Delectable. Delectable. Delectable? Delectable. Delectable? No. No. Forget it. Here's a girl. Look at her. Here's a girl. There was a court case on the news. A girl, one of the... She got adopted. Or a foster. She wanted to get rid, legally, away from a biological family called the Twigs. Seriously. With two G's. The Twigs. She was in Florida. She was suing them to legally get away from them and let the adopted family... You know, they were Twigs. So when everybody was talking about it, I said, well, I guess, since she's really trying to stick it to the Twigs. You know what the ambition... You know what the ambition of a tree cutter is? To be a branch manager. Wasn't that good though, sticking to the Twigs? Eileen, that was pretty good. No, it wasn't. A tree cutter, a branch manager. Yeah, I got it. That was real great. Yeah, you see how some dudes are? They're worse than washed women in the office. Do you ever know what some people... Do you see how petty they are? Some people can't tell a joke. That was a funny-ass joke. To you. To us, we just said... Branch manager. Yeah, that's clever. You know what? If you're that clever, why aren't you making extra money at Banana's Comedy Club next month? I thought you don't want to do that. It's that simple. Why aren't you doing that? If you're that clever... You're wasting your talents. Why aren't you trying it? It's called gainful employment. You want to go for open mic night? They haven't opened mic? They probably haven't. And you haven't even done it. I don't want to do that. What do you want to do? I don't want to do nothing. I want to be left alone. South... Because South Coutry is saying, what does William want to do? South Coutry doesn't know what he wants to do. I know, I know. He tried to get him hooked up with an agency. No, he didn't. No, he didn't. He wouldn't even give us the name of his agency. Remember, so he could try. Oh, yeah, South was afraid of competition. Boy, it wouldn't South if he... I don't know. That would have been the sight to behold. Could you imagine if Ray and South showed up at the same time with her? Well, they'd have a manager choice. Oh, my God. It doesn't feel like a Sunday. No. But it is. How do you think it is? Yesterday was so great. I think someone here... It's Monday. Were you here? Yeah. You know when they redid Main Street and Lodi? The civil engineer says, this is going to solve the flooding problem? Don't throw him out. Okay. Do you know that the flooding problem... Don't throw him out, but I won't throw him out, okay? You want to throw that out? But not him, okay? Oh, okay, Ireland. That's what you say. You know that the flooding problem was never solved by the civil engineer. Somebody throw that out? If you want it. I don't want to, but I will. Okay, thank you. Oh, I really want to throw this out to the public. Thank you, Bill. You're welcome. This is just what I want to do. You can't, you can't beat, you can't beat, you can't beat Mother Nature. You know, I mean... Mother Nature, that's right. The flooding problem was never, was never solved. So what's going on, Karen? Is that it today? Well, she's eating, that's why she's quiet. I'll tell you, you know what? I don't know if it's, I don't know if it's male menopause, if it's geriatric menopause, but some guys really get petty, they get jealous, and they get grouchy when they get old. Speaking of, my finger pointing outside right now, they get really petty. I've known a couple other dudes that when they hit, when they got into their 60s, they got really petty. And petty is like, like, you know, when teenage girls talk about each other behind their back, you know, like a reality show, the housewives of Atlanta, the housewives of Beverly Hills, and they get, they're petty. Or catty, maybe, yeah, but they have money. They're married to rich men and they're homemaker, well, I shouldn't say homemakers. They don't cook, they don't, like my sister-in-law, she don't do laundry, she don't do anything. And my brother runs a business. No, no. So what I'm saying is they get petty, they get catty, and this guy, he's a blatant downright liar of what he said earlier. That's why I raised my voice. He's a damn liar. He literally would be, it would be a mistake to hang out with him at Gabriel's by the bar because he would, he would want to scoff up, he would want all the attention on him because he's an egomaniac. I've known him for 35 years, but he's a damn selfish egomaniac. And I've known, I've known others. I was friends with them because I, I tolerated them because I've known them for so many years. I just tolerated them until I meet nice people that make good friends. Right now I tolerate him like I tolerated the other guy to die. The one I used to do political internet talk shows with, he passed away. But he was a miserable, jealous grouch. He's like this guy. There's a lot like that. Yeah, he was literally a guarantee if we were at a bar, literally embarrassed me. So he would get, he would get all the attention in the bar. And then I would like, now you know why you hear about like violence, about who, you know, who blew, somebody blown somebody else away and things like that. Yeah, like, like, like, shoot somebody. Now you, now you know there's always two sunnights every store. That's why sometimes I'll go out like to Blackjack Mulligans in Garfield, which is a great place to eat and drink, great food. It's an Irish sports bar. Irish pub. Great place to go. I'll go by myself. A couple people know me there. And nobody aggravates me. It's like, you know, he tells me that a university prove that cigarette smoking does nothing bad for your health. I said, come on. I says, no, I can't believe that. Of course, why? Because he does not want to quit smoking. Now he's coming back in now. He doesn't want to quit smoking. He says that university says smoking, tobacco smoking does nothing for your, to harm you. He's really, you know, his oncologist told him that, you know, told him, you need to stop. You need to quit. Oh, yeah. You know, this morning, the oddest thing, it's a real nice, Black family had to be 12 or more coming home again. Oh, wow. I said, oh, where are you from, George? He said, oh, we're not from Georgia. I said, oh, my parents went to Georgia Tech. And he goes, he left. He goes, well, he did. Another big one to Georgia Tech. I saw him later. I said, you went to Georgia. He goes, yeah. I told him we were talking to some basketball tech in the past. John Solly, one of the most famous tech players and most famous NBA players ever. Then his other buddy came up and mentioned something about he was, yeah, we just got up from Texas. I said, I lived in San Antonio. He said, that's where we were. Holy Macklin. I said, wow. Then their next person came up, Maryland, please. He said, you from Maryland? He said, yeah, why? I said, I was born in Baltimore. So we had Baltimore, Georgia, and Texas. This is why it's so fascinating. I said, you being over there. But this is all on family. I mean, it's amazing. Your three states in your life. And we just came coming from them. I said, wow. That's amazing. That was something. Nice people. And the Maryland fly is gorgeous. It's beautiful. The way it looks. The stay fly. What are the kind is there? The stay fly, yeah. I think the Ravens have it on their uniform. Ravens, who cares? Yeah, but what a great looking uniform they have. With the helmet, with that bird. No, I love the Colts horseshoe. I live for the horseshoe. Well, the owner. She's going to raise? What's she doing? She's going to raise? She's leaving? No, no, she's going to bathroom. You know, she takes that purse. Go knock on the door in the bathroom. You know. The purse, I guarantee you, was full of garbage. And she won't part with any of it. The girl ladies room here about four or five times the best. I see women. That happened to me in Baja, Mexico. I had to use the ladies room. I had no choice. Is that messy? You can't. You can't? Then at pub 46 in Clifton, this girl just couldn't wait online any longer to get in the ladies room. She was taking a chance, but she did it real fast though. She ran into an already occupied men's room, did what she had to do, and booked and left. You know, if I was in there as a guy, you know me, I could care less. Like if you were at the urinal, you wouldn't like turn around. I've been in there stinking a piss, and the girl walks in the clean and goes, hello, come on in. No, no, no, no, no. You know me, I got like, come on in. I don't care, what am I doing? My back's keep on taking a piss. So what? Don't be so sensitive, right? Don't be so sensitive. Well, I know the college university experiment of the ball gender that didn't work out. I knew it wasn't going to work. Ball gender restaurant. You know what, you're transgender? Jimmy transgender. The Don Rickle arrows don't stop. They just don't stop. They don't stop, baby. Up in the treetop all day long, rocking in a bobbin and singing his song. I'm transgender. Rock and robin tweet, twiddly tweet. When a boy changes from bobby socks to twinks. Now he's going to get pissed because I'm going do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do do. Jimmy's got tears. He's got tears. I'm doing that because he's already throwing arrows. He's always shooting arrows at me. I might as well. Look up to those. Look up to those. Look up to your ear. Your amulet is ruled by a demon and it loves William. Scared. Samuel it loves William. He has tits. All right. Let's settle down folks. Let's settle down. Let's settle down. Listen. I want to talk about lobster rolls. No, let's talk about you and your tit problems. It's not a tit. It's a pectoralis major. It's a tit problem. And look, it can go in different... It's strange. That's sick. No, it's not. It could be done. You know how many decrepit people can't do that? You know how many decrepit men have no ability to do that? You're the one decrepit guy that can do that. No, it's called... You do chest exercises. No, they can. No, on the contrary. They go like this. I've seen it in a go-go bar. They can. If they work... Again? Are you looking for a way? No, if they work out, they can. I'll go over there later. Let's talk about the recipe of the lobster roll. No. Okay, I won't. Well, it's better than talking about the thanks rocks outside. We don't talk about those in this. But they're so smooth, like a baby's bottom. Good. So I lean. I forgot you. What were you going to ask? Something funny. I don't know. I got tired of the purse thing She's never going to empty that up. When I put it in the new purse, I'll empty it out. Yeah, a bigger one. It's called a suitcase. When I put it in the new purse, I'll empty it out. You should see how big it is for a suit. Remember the thing on Seinfeld where Kramer had this clip and he put his money in a clip. He says, while it's their passe, while it's their old-fashioned and George Costanz says, I like a wallet. He takes his wallet out and he had rubber bands wrapped around, you know, vertically and horizontally because he had loads of expired coupons in it and crap. Are you listening? I'm being sarcastic right now. Yes. The Chic of Arabic. My grandfather used to sing this song. It was like a 1920 song. You can't rush candy. You know Ruto Valentino's silent movies? Oh, I wish. Let's read. Jimmy, let me pretend we're in a silent movie. He would love that. Nosferatu. Jimmy, we're in a silent movie. Except when Bill has something to say. Yes. I don't feel continuously relaxed. Well, the branch manager thing is funny as hell. No, it really wasn't. It was very old. Oh, that's what made it cheesy. I got you now. It was always been done so much. Somebody else invented the joke? A long time ago. But I was assured. Let the tables clean them. Man, that was a short break. Excuse me, napkins, napkins. There's a nice water control. God, are you obsessed? No, they're free. It's beating the system. Oh, I love beating this capitalist system. And you want to marry this? No, I beat the capitalist system. Isn't that beautiful? Oh, you really took them down. I don't have to buy napkins for a while. What do you have at home? I got a stack, baby. But you do. Well, from the first day I returned. What? Where the hell are you going? There aren't any words left. What are you looking for? Naked pictures? A horoscope. You dropped something. Oh, can I see that? You know, they have a horoscope on Twitter. I'm the one that brought the papers in. They have a horoscope on Twitter, Eileen. But you can find it right in the paper. You don't need Twitter. Twitter is so easy and high-tech. Yeah. Unfortunately... If you want me to go page by page, Eileen, don't do that. What? You're going to go page by page. But unfortunately, my brother-in-law was right. We're going to fight upon on the Internet. We are being... Our personal dad is being collected. No. Every time people log in. Nobody's doing anything. Do I have it? I'll find it for you. Yes. You know the horoscope in this paper? I didn't know you knew. Where are they going? Jesus. God, I'm not going to steal it from you. Relax. Eileen, your logic is approved. First with the mechanic. But I'm sorry, the hoarding... That's an obstacle you need to overcome. Okay, there's one. That's an obstacle that's going to be a hard nut to crack. Now, I gave my sister a good answer. Salmon actually blows away tuna in many ways. Give me a freaking break. I'll take this order. tuna. Give me a quick break. One second, Eileen. It's freaking great. Ooh, look at that cruise. Eileen, here. You're a what? Sagittarius. Oh, God doesn't know. It's got skull crossbones here. The archer. That means death. Sagittarius. What goes up must come down. Give me... What goes up must come down is one of those natural laws that also applies to tales of exaggeration. Oh, shit. A lesson you likely know all too well. You tend to creatively weave into daily life dreams of extraordinary experiences. Finish old business and tie up loose ends until you have the chance. This means you, Eileen. That's it. That's the whole thing. Well, not that this means you, Eileen. And it talks about my guy and Ray. Got a picture of your boys and Jimmy and Ray here. Finish up loose ends. Finish old business and tie up loose ends. They're not talking here. Or shoelaces. Why don't you buy a tie up loose ends while you have the chance? Things that are hanging up in the air and things like that. Loose ends mean get the car fixed, right? Well, not just the car, but anything that's hanging over your head that's not getting done. There's a loose end, you know, get it done. You're from Ireland, right? No, it's Scotland. Oh, I want to try Haggis. I need to try Haggis. Maybe if I go down and lend her to Jersey on this. He is a Haggis. No, no. There's a couple famous people. No, she's from Scotland. And I got a black thorn shoelay at home. Just in case. Just in case I need it. Just in case the wife hits our hands. No, no, not for that. You know, you know, evil people. Demons. But I... Well, I need to... I need to... Yeah, she... She was Colombian and she used me for a green card. And then she left. But I would never, I would never use it. You know, I would use it on real bad people, you know. If I had to. Yeah, well, she was a great actress, though. I never knew it. Because she already got a piece and a commission and a green card and everything. Well, a tourist visa is good for six years or ten years? I mean months. Donald Trump? No. He wouldn't stop. No. What do you think it has to link they made in London, England of Donald Trump's line up in America? Was it a baby or a baby Trump? He had a diaper on. He had a good idea. And it's like they flew it. They don't like it. I don't think there's too many countries that like it. They don't like it in Europe. That's right, man. My family goes to Spain and everything for vacation. I still have family over there. Yeah. I still have the... I like... I like putting sausage bangers Sheppard's pie I like it. I got to try and hang it. I don't know how it was. Oh, it's so far. I like that better than steak. I love it too. I have one too. It's on the avenue. It's on the avenue. Oh. I've been to New York but not there. Yeah. Climb it. Walk up the line. You can walk up the line. Go stay, stay. No, I'm going to go. I got to go get these frozen dinner. Yes. I got to get all of the stuff. Ta-da-da. I know all countries have their own version of black pudding. They all do it in a slightly different way. Yeah. Oh, yeah. I like... They use a lot of paprika. Paprika, yeah. Paprika would you say? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Now what? Can you hear this? Oh, yeah. Oh, yeah. Yeah. Yeah. You know, it's better than cooking and eating it. Eating? Not cleaning. I'm cleaning up after this. Is this your sister? No, that's my friend. We're here. Great. Oh. I'm surprised. I'm surprised my blood pressure didn't go sky-high today. With this maniacal Sunday Madness. Unbelievable. I don't know how I tolerate it all. See you guys. And gals. This has been Omega Lab 21 production.