 narcissists and gaslighting another video I'm going to be talking about one of the narcissists favorite tactics gaslighting please like this video and share it with anyone who you believe it might help if you haven't subscribed please click the subscribe button in the bottom right of this video or underneath the video if you are interested in one-on-one coaching for recovery from narcissistic abuse please contact me my email is in the video description first I would like to read a definition on gaslighting from wikipedia gaslighting is a form of psychological manipulation that seeks to sow seeds of doubt and a targeted individual or a members of a targeted group making them question their own memory perception and sanity gaslighting is a favorite tactic of narcissists and other abusers the purpose of gaslighting is to make you lose your judgment to distort your reality they don't want you to see who they really are that's why they create these illusions the illusions aren't believable enough on their own so they manipulate you at the same time they will say or do something which offends or confuses you in some way when you ask them to repeat it or expand on what they have just said or done they will act as though they never said or did it they are very cowardly people they cannot own up to what they have said or done they cannot take responsibility or hold accountability for any of their words or actions there is always an excuse or a reason for their behavior notice how it's always something bad to do with you it's always about how you have done something wrong or they are trying to help you and you are not letting them it's always about something that's wrong with you because they can never self-reflect or lock within themselves the thought of looking at themselves and what they have done is very painful for them so they are not going to do it and if they cannot blame themselves they are going to blame you they will tell you that you have said or done things that you haven't said or done most of the time they will know that you didn't say or do whatever it is they are accusing you of but in some cases due to their hypervigilance and paranoia they will actually believe that you have said or done something even when you haven't they are prone to impulsively cheat and lie this is why they become so hypervigilant and paranoid about what they think you are doing they will almost never admit to cheating or lying even if you have all of the evidence even if you have video footage of them doing it they will still deny it and call you crazy because they cannot accept responsibility or accountability for any of their actions in the rare case that they do admit to it they will use the blame-shifting tactic they will say that you did something to make them cheat or lie this then takes the focus of them and certainly you are being accused of some of doing something wrong they will intentionally cloud your judgment because they want you to do the wrong things they want you to do something bad then they can blame you for it then they don't feel so bad about the things that they have done and it gives them a further reason to abuse and manipulate you the narcissist will always have a reason or excuse for what they do to you sometimes they create these reasons on their own they just make them up it could be something they think you have done or it could be something you have done which they have then blown up and exaggerated to suit their own needs and give them a further reason to abuse and manipulate you they will never acknowledge the fact that they have provoked you to act in this way often the narcissist will intentionally cloud your judgment to the point where you do something wrong which they can then hold against you and uses their excuse or reason for abusing you narcissists are obsessed with power and control I believe that the reason for this is because deep down they feel so powerless and out of control this is how they have felt all their lives so now they have a tight grasp on creating and maintaining this false sense of power and control they do this by making you question your own your own reality making you confused making you doubt yourself they are making you lose power and control over yourself and if there is one person we should all have power and control over it is ourselves we do not need to hold power or control over anyone else that is not healthy that is what emotionally immature toddlers do but like the emotionally immature toddlers the narcissist feels powerless and out of control they feel weak and helpless they feel as though they need to protect and defend themselves even when they are not under any form of attack they cannot hold power or control over themselves as they are very weak and cowardly individuals so their only other option is to find a victim to control which will then give them them give them a false sense of power narcissistic gaslighters operate in a very similar way to that of a child molester I discovered this on my own I knew I had seen this behavior somewhere before I then locked into it further and discovered a video by Dr. Ross Rosenberg here on YouTube where he compares the narcissist to a child molester the way they target their victim they are no different to child molesters they calculate their attack like a predator ready to pounce in their prey they specifically target victims who will doubt their own intuition victims who do not keep close family or friends victims who are easy to isolate they will then create a code of silence surrounding the abuse calling them crazy or saying that they are imagining it if they speak up about it the narcissist and the child molester personality are exactly the same and although they may not appear to be a child involved in this situation if you look deeper into it they are targeting a child they are targeting your inner child on a psychological and spiritual level I think it is important to note that even after a narcissist has abused you although they appear satisfied and relieved on the surface beneath that they are still miserable the gratification they receive from abusing you last from for a very short amount of time this is why they like to take up a lot of your time to prolong the abuse so they can get as much as they can to keep them going they are literally addicted to your presence energy and emotions they are they are addicted to your attention and validation of them they cannot get enough of it because it is the only thing that makes them feel alive even if it's just for a short amount of time there is nothing you can tell them they cannot see the train until it takes them down this is how they live their lives impulsive decisions solely based on a specific agenda while come without fearing or even thinking of the consequences and that's what makes these people so dangerous they are desperate for narcissistic supply they need their attention and validation without it they will soon realize what worthless low-value people they really are the attention and validation is nothing more than a distraction from them seeing who or what they really are gaslighting is a tactic which they they use to confuse you and make you believe that you are crazy they want to confuse you and make you think that you are wrong even when you are right they dictate your thoughts feelings beliefs values and principles to you they really believe that they know you better than you know yourself even though they never took the time to get to know you if you ask them you will find that they don't even know the first thing about you but they are in denial to protect their own fragile egos they are living in their own reality which does not apply to the rules and morals of our society they are crazy people and the only way they can feel normal is to make you feel like you are crazy they want you to doubt your own eyes your own years and your own brain they know that your senses are important to you and you need them to live a satisfying and fulfilling life they don't want you to live a fulfilling life so they will specifically target your senses they will make you think that you are seeing hearing and imagining things they want you to doubt your own mind they are envious of your mind and it is a threat to them so they want to destroy it they are like unemployed actors magicians and illusionists they will move things around and then deny it it provokes a reaction within you and then they just sit back and watch they want to attach strings to you and control you like a puppet they will always try to intimately connect to your senses to control your way of thinking they want to create a connection with you even though they know all too well it isn't wanted they want to take control of your senses they want to take control of your body mind and soul narcissists love to use their manipulative tactics gaslighting denial projection blame shifting these people are very petty and cowardly but if you dare to use one of their tactics against them and give them a taste of their own medicine you will create a narcissistic injury they can dish it out but they cannot take it remember only weak people do these kinds of things and once you have created a narcissistic injury they will literally spend the rest of their lives trying to abuse and sabotage your life the crazy thing is how they repeat the same acts of abuse again and again for years even when it doesn't cause you any distress it really is the definition of insanity just as Einstein once said they get themselves in this habit or routine of using certain abusive and manipulative tactics and they don't know how to get out of it they become slaves to their own game slaves to their own tactics they give the illusion that they're in complete control of what they do but the reality is they are more of a slave to it than we ever were they always end up becoming a victim of their own game and i guess that that is their karma you cannot hold a balanced conversation with the narcissist the reason for this is because they see conversations as a tool to extract information about you they then use this information to manipulate and abuse you later in the relationship they will also use conversations to gaslight and emotionally abuse you they distort your reality all day every day anything you do or say will be taken into their mental office and then interpreted in a completely different way no matter how much of a positive person you are it will always be distorted and twisted into something negative after being around these people for a certain amount of time you may have difficulty with socializing you may not be you may not have good social skills the best way to improve your social skills is to interact with real people rather than narcissists narcissists will only destroy your social skills if you are surrounded by narcissists in your life watch an interaction of real healthy people in a video on youtube this can reinforce your understanding of how real people interact and this is where you want to be remember real emotionally healthy people have no need or desire to abuse or manipulate you in any way although you may be feeling vulnerable right now remember that real emotionally healthy people will not take advantage of your vulnerability maybe it is difficult to find good people in your area so please communicate with each other in the comment section share your details talk on the phone and even meet up if you live near each other this channel is not only about narcissistic abuse it is also about bringing people together