 Hello and welcome to our video showing you a step-by-step breakdown of how to write an amazing level nine model answer My name is Barbara and in this video I'll go over with you how to write a model answer to a Christmas Carol past paper exam question Now don't forget that we have an amazing GCSE aqa course covering Christmas Carol as well as all papers as well as texts For the English language and it should GCSEs do make sure you sign up for it using our link below So let's begin by looking at a past paper question Bear in mind that a Christmas Carol appears in paper one of the English literature exam along with a Shakespeare related question So let's read through this past paper question and discuss how to plan and write a winning essay now the exam question will always present you with an extract and You'll be expected to use it as your starting point So you'll be asked to look at the extract make some points related to the extract and then of course talk about some Points from the novella as a whole. So let's look at the extract, which is of course your starting point Now the question states in this extract Scrooge's time with the ghost of Christmas present is coming to an end Discuss how Dickens presents the theme of poverty in this extract and the novella as a whole Forgive me if I'm not justified on what I ask said Scrooge looking intently at the spirits robe But I see something strange and not belonging to yourself protruding from the skirts Is it a foot or a claw? It might be a claw for the flesh that there is upon it was a spirit's sorrowful reply Look here From the foldings of its robe it brought two children wretched abject frightful hideous miserable The knelt down at his feet and clung upon the outside of its garment. Oh, man. Look here. Look look down here exclaimed the ghost They were a boy and a girl yellow meager ragged scowling more fish, but prostrate to in their humility Where graceful youth should have filled their features out and touched them with its freshest tints a Stale and shriveled hand like that of age had pinched and twisted them and pulled them into shreds Where angels might have sat and throned devils lurked and glared out menacing No change no degradation no perversion of humanity in any grade through all the mysteries of wonderful creation has monsters half so horrible in dread Scrooge started back appalled Having them shown to him in this way he tried to say they were fine children But the words choked themselves rather than be parties to a lie of such enormous magnitude Spirit are they yours Scrooge could say no more They are man's said the spirit looking down upon them and they cling to me appealing from their fathers This boy's ignorance this girl's want beware them both and all of their degree But most of all beware this boy for on his brow I see that written which is doom and lest the writing be erased deny it cry the spirit stretching out its hand towards the city Slander those who tell it he admit it for your fact just purposes and make it worse and abide the end Have they no refuge of resource cried Scrooge Are they no prisons said the spirit turning on him for the last time of his own words. Well, they know work houses The bell struck 12 Scrooge looked about him for the ghost and saw it not As the last stroke sees to vibrate He remembered the prediction of old Jacob Marley and lifting up his eyes be held a solemn phantom Draped and hooded coming like a mist along the ground towards him Okay, so the question essentially asks Starting with this extract How does Dickens present the theme of poverty in a Christmas Carol? So of course the question always asks you to first begin in the first bullet point But fixing in on the extract in this case how Dickens presents theme of health poverty in the extract And of course then you expected to talk about it in relating to the developer as a whole Now when answering this question, of course always remember It's really essential to focus in on the keywords keywords meaning the areas that your answer needs to focus in on and of course the keywords are how Dickens presents the theme of Poverty okay, and of course you expected to look at how this theme is presented in the extract and in the novella as a whole Now with this kind of question It's always good to pick out three points from the extract from the beginning Middle and towards the end, but then of course do remember to point out elements from the novella as a whole So from my reading and especially of course what's happened in this passage is we see Scrooge encountering the ghost of Christmas present who presents to him essentially the effects of poverty on children It makes these two children ignorance and want to look really horrendous and of course Scrooge really sees in a very sharp way just the terrible Underside of the industrial revolution, okay Now selecting from just the extracts of course here I would suggest always write down a plan with just three points taken from the extract and then of course two points Quotations that you've memorized from elsewhere in the Nevada. I would say from the extract It's good to point out how the children are Described yellow meager ragged scowling wallfish and then of course make sure you point out whether it's a structure or language Technique that Dickens uses in this case is structures listing a syndeton a syndeton meaning when there's listing without any conjunctions Now the second thing I would select from this extract is when the spirit talks about both ignorance on one and most Specifically he highlights ignorance He says beware of them both and all of the degree but most of all beware this boy for on his brow I see that written which is doomed and of course in this case and in this specific example There's a really good case of alliteration as well as repetition, okay So of course you've got repetition of beware It's written here twice and of course you've also got alliteration of be which is a plosive sound, okay But beware and boy The final thing I'll suggest from the extract is are there no prisons and of course this is a rhetorical question The ghost is mocking Scrooge who had asked initially at the beginning of the novella When the men asked for charity and arms if there were no prisons that poor people could go to so this ghost is Basically turning this back on Scrooge to show how his selfishness has ruined society Now in case you are curious where I had taken these three quotations from the extract I'll refer you to as you can see here. So this is towards the middle of the extract This is a description of both the boy and the girl and then of course here where the spirit is telling Scrooge to be Beware of them and finally here where the spirit is mocking Scrooge's own words Now I would suggest when you're fleshing out your response from elsewhere It's sufficient to point out to two quotations from elsewhere in the novella as long as they are relevant to the keywords And of course this is to do with the theme of poverty how it's presented Now my points would be relating to first tiny Tim and the Cratchit family So when Tim says God blesses everyone, okay And of course also the quotation is extended where it's describing how Bob held his withered little hand in his Okay, so this quotation is from elsewhere in the novella and the exclamatory sentence So this is a structure technique that Dickens uses coupled with alliteration So this is Bob held his withered little hand shows that the Cratchits are grateful in spite of their poverty The other point I would select is there they stood upon a bleak desert more a place where miners live Now I've selected this because there's really dark sinister imagery here the miners of course Who power the industrial revolution because they're the ones who essentially produce a coal They essentially produce the fuels and the minerals that power factories in spite of the miserable conditions that they live in They are still grateful again How this presents poverty is that ironically while Scrooge is very ungrateful and he has plenty Those who are poor including tiny Tim the Cratchit family and these miners. They are extremely grateful Okay, so now we've got our plan. We've read through the extract We've developed our plan. Let's look at how we can write a really strong level 9 model answer Now, of course when you're writing a model answer, it's always important to begin with an introduction Okay, and of course also end with a conclusion Bear in mind introduction conclusion should take you no more than two minutes each in total four minutes So two minutes for your quick introduction and two minutes for your quick conclusion What an introduction and conclusion is is you're just showing the examiner that you know how to open and close an essay You should not be taking ten minutes to begin your essay. Okay, so now I'm going to begin my introduction by using a bit of the question Dickens effectively presents the theme of poverty in this extra novella as a whole through using a range of characters to illustrate How widespread poverty it was in Victorian England However, he also shows just how poor people were still thankful for the little they had while the rich like Scrooge Took their abundance for granted Now as I mentioned an introduction and a conclusion needn't be more complex than that You're just opening it. It's icing on the cake and as I've mentioned I have alluded back to the question of mentioned the theme of poverty and I've talked about it with regards to the extract and Of course, the novella as a whole. Okay, and I've also briefly Summarized that of course the theme of poverty is used to show not only how widespread poverty was in Victorian England This was a big problem, but also the conversely poor people were still really thankful for the little they had Okay, and that's really my introduction introduction. You don't introduce any information in terms of quotations. You're just opening your discussion So let's look at my first point related to my plan. So this is to do with yellow meager ragged scowling and wolfish Within the extract the theme of poverty is revealed when Scrooge meets the ghost of Christmas present who presents him children who appear horrific as a yellow meager ragged scowling wolfish Dickens use of his syndetine is powerful and vividly depicting how sick and sinister the young children look Much like Scrooge We as readers are taken aback by their parents as children who are young and innocent as opposed to look vibrant and youthful Contextually Dickens wanted to show his readers who tended to be upper-class literate readers the horrors of poverty And how life was difficult for the poor even from the beginning of their lives Life in Victorian England for the poor was often be set with difficulty and danger Indeed the children represent poverty because the girl is called want which represents a lack of essential resources like food and shelter However, the boy is called ignorance which represents the children who are unable to go to school and thus are illiterate The damaging impact poverty can have in stealing the innocence of children is vividly Emphasized through these two children who are meant to inspire empathy and pathos within his Victorian readers Now I'm going to break down how this works Okay, so of course you want to use the point evidence explanation and linking back to the question method Okay, now I'm going to use a slightly different color code to point out my point Okay, so essentially I've opened by linking it back to my point and of course I've also embedded my evidence in my point Okay, so we've got point and then here we've got evidence which is embedded. I'm going to use green for the evidence Okay, now here you've got your explanation Okay, so I'm going to highlight my explanation in pink Now I then link it back However in my link and the analysis I point out Context and I'm going to remove the colors so that you can clearly see what I mean here. Okay, and I'm going to give context yellow Now this is really really important because a lot of people where they miss out on and this is where you get your bulk of the level 9 answers is this yellow section. This is the analysis This is linking back and this is of course also adding in Context a lot of people are very good and a lot of students are really really good at answering the questions Linking it back. So as you can see here in the blue within the extract the theme of poverty is revealed when Scrooge meets The ghost of Christmas present who presents to him children who appear horrific This is your point and this is a good point to make of course because you're linking it back to the question You're talking about poverty, which is of course the key word Then their evidence is yellow mega ragged scarling wolfish taken from the passage. This is great Then you explain Dickens is use of a syndicate and as you can see here, I have mentioned and I have placed in Structure technique. Okay, it's powerful in showing how sick and sinister the young children look I've now explained in the passage your children are presented as looking really terrible and Just like Scrooge. We are supposedly also taken back by how horrible and horrendous they look This is really really strong and if for example, you are not to include your link back For instance, let's say if we were to take away that This would probably be a really good level five slash maybe a low level six response or a low level six paragraph However, to now really jump up and now start aiming for your level eight and your level nine answers You have got to include this bulk. This is the analysis. This is the analytical depth that a lot of students forget You want to link it back to context? This is vital Okay, so of course, this is not to say that point evidence explanation is important It is it really important. However, this is just half of the journey Now you then have to link it back to the analysis. You need to link it back to context What I've done here is I pointed out that Dickens had upper-class readers, right? A lot of people who during the Victorian period who could read they were literate There were people of leisure there were people who could afford to pay school fees A lot of these people did not know the horrors of poverty So Dickens's description of these children is showing what life really was like And I go into detail and I show how both children represent, of course poverty So they don't have a lot of poor people in Victorian England and have food didn't have shelter And of course like the boy that didn't go to school and then I've then explained why poverty is Really really important in terms of how it takes away the innocence of children and how Dickens shows the horrifying effects of poverty Okay, so that's the first point Let's go to now the second point again from my plan So this is where beware for all of them in their degree and this is when The ghost points out to Scrooge how the boy especially presents a massive danger to society So let's see how I've developed this Furthermore the ghost presents the dangers of poverty as he warns Scrooge to beware them both But most of all beware this boy for on his brow. I see that which is written doom The theme of poverty is effectively presented through the use of illiteration when the ghost tells Scrooge to beware this boy as well as the repetition of beware This ominous warning Represents one of the most terrible effects of poverty in Victorian England, which was the lack of education Contextually most poor people were unable to afford to send their children to school to be educated They needed the children working from a young age Hence most poor children grew up to be illiterate adults who were trapped in a cycle of poverty Consequently, they became menaces to society as they turned to crime to pay for their lives Therefore Dickens's wealthy readers were being warned that if they did not help the poor children These children would go into adults who stole and plundered their belongings Again, as you can see here I've linked it back to the question of mentioned poverty and this is my point and again I've tied in my point to evidence. Of course, you've got the point here. You've then got evidence Which I'm going to put in green Then here we've got explanation. I've then also talked about techniques. So I've mentioned alliteration. I've also mentioned repetition Now here as you can see again as I've mentioned then then there's this link So of course you've got explanation and then I'm going to put explanation and link in pink However, as you can see this is only half of my answer and half of my paragraph because I then go into depth I've linked it back to the question and I've gone into more context and especially explained why the ghost has pointed out the boy especially as being Ignorance and why society should be particularly afraid of him So let's move on to the third and final point taken from the extract itself Moreover the theme of poverty is illustrated through Scrooge's negative attitude towards the poor which the ghost reminds him of Scrooge is shocked and horrified at the state of the children. However, the ghost mocks him by asking him are there no prisons This rhetorical question is effective as it mocks us Scrooge's early attitude and stave one when he turned away the men who are asking for his charity contributions to help the poor This rhetorical question shows the theme of poverty as it reveals that many rich people in Victorian England believed it was the Fault of the poor that they were destitute. In other words, they felt that the poor should be sent to prisons or workhouses If they were unable to get out of poverty the government used the 1834 poor law as a way of managing the problem of poverty whereby the poor who are Unemployed for forced to live and work in grim factories in order to be removed off the streets Dickens makes us as readers realize the dominant attitude of the rich towards the poor at the time was shocking and it needed to change Again here as you can see I've linked it back to the question. I've mentioned the key word poverty and here essentially, I've mentioned my point So as you can see here, here's my point linking it back, but I've also embedded my point with Evidence so point in blue evidence in green Now you can see my explanation and I've also mentioned in my explanation this rhetorical question is important So I've also mentioned technique which is structure now I've also explained this structure and how this shows the theme of poverty as You can see here. I've then linked it again once more to context And I've been really specific in mentioning the poor laws and why the poor laws for Dickens especially He was really really critical of how essentially these poor laws punished poor people and of course made the issue of poverty Much much worse. So now I am done with my first three points from the extract Okay, so as you can see I have opened with my introduction I've then opened and developed my points and of course mentioned things like a syndetine I've mentioned things like a litteration I've mentioned techniques such as repetition of then also of course developed and linked it back to context and I've really developed my points so far. Okay, so this is really a very solid level nine essay Now, of course, you need to link it to elsewhere and the novella and as I mentioned I'm going to make two extra points from elsewhere in the novella. So beginning by God bless us everyone And this is what tiny Tim says So let's see how I developed this Elsewhere in the novella Dickens presents the theme of poverty when we witness how thankful the quatchit family are and This starkly contrasts with Scrooge's miserly and ungrateful attitude in spite of being rich Whilst having a Christmas dinner Bob Cratchit's sickly son says God bless us everyone. So tiny Tim Bob head is withered little hand in his Dickens effective uses exclamatory sentence. God blesses everyone to convey how grateful the quatchit family are for what they have Furthermore, the literation held hand his Emphasizes the hopefulness Bob Cratchit has as well as how positive he is in spite of being so poor and having a sick son We as readers feel empathy for both tiny Tim and Bob Cratchit as it did not focus on what they lack This shows the reader that although the people who do not have much money live in poverty. They seem happier than Scrooge This emphasises to us money does not make you happy and even in poverty people can find joy in their family So again here I want to point out when I'm talking about elsewhere in the extract I've opened with my point I've talked about also in the novella and of course I've also used key words poverty I've also signposted that I'm now moving on I'm moving on from the extract And I'm saying elsewhere in the novella so also used language that signposts to your examiner that you're moving on Then I've now put my Evidence here, okay, and I've quoted directly from the rest of the novella And then I've explained and I've mentioned and made allusion to how this Links back to the question and then of course I've then Analyzed and linked it back to the question further more and in this case I've talked about how the quatchit family and tiny Tim really contrast how ungrateful So whilst they're poor and they're in poverty actually, they're really really grateful and this is in contrast to Scrooge, okay So let's look at my final point from elsewhere in the novella and again You'll see how I'm able to essentially develop this points Finally the theme of poverty is presented elsewhere in the novella when the ghost of Christmas present takes Scrooge to see the miners and the remote moors Scrooge and the ghost stood upon a blink and does it more a place where miners live The dark and sinister imagery used conveys to us the pitiful conditions the miners live in However, in spite of the poverty, they're still very grateful to celebrate Christmas together showing Scrooge that we can be happy and content without money Contextually Dickens used this scene to reveal to his upper-class readers the pitiful state the miners who are at the heart of powering the industrial revolutions lived in This dark imagery depicts the shocking conditions that the miners lived in However, in spite of their horrific lives, which was often difficult, they were still grateful for the little that they had Again here. I've made my point linking it back to the question I've then developed my point by using evidence and I've supported my point talking about evidence from elsewhere in the novella I've then made my explanation here and talked about how in spite of being really poor The miners are really grateful and are finished off with linking and Analyzing in-depth and of course mentioning how miners are really really important and the role that they play in the industrial evolution Linking it back to context and developing it. Okay So now let's look at my conclusion and how I finally round off my essay and as I mentioned your conclusion should take you No more than two minutes. You just link it back to the question. You don't want to add any new informational evidence Okay, you're just rounding off your discussion In conclusion Dickens has used a range of characters and settings to illustrate the horrendous impact poverty had on people during victoria in England However, we as readers witness the contrast between how poor people like Bob Cratcher and the miners were still thankful While the worth of the like Scrooge took the privileges for granted and again here. I've used signposting language I've said in conclusion to show my examiner that I'm now concluding. I'm closing my essay I've then linked it back to the question This is to do with the impact of poverty and of course I've then talked about how we as readers see a contrast between people like Bob Cratcher versus Scrooge So that it's the poor who actually are really thankful whilst people like Scrooge who have plenty who are wealthy actually take the privileges for granted So that's really it when it comes to developing this model answer and a really solid level nine answer and response to Your model questions. So do make sure you bear this all in mind and especially don't forget the importance of analytical depth in your answers, okay? So that's all if you found this video helpful Make sure you give it a thumbs up and consider subscribing to our channel Also, don't forget that we have a comprehensive English GCSE aqa course Which covers everything you need to practice and learn and secure a level nine in your English literature and English language GCSE The link is in the description box below Thank you so much for watching