Just between us, because I trust you Let me ask, how do the blind become so famous? They claim they've seen it all No fact too large or small Truth be told they can't even find the door
At the crosswalk they click their silly canes Offer an arm and they dismiss you with disdain How can the deformed, the sightless, parade so proud and righteous? To those with eyes the injustice is so plain
Let's raise a glass to those left on the outside Forever silent, forever nameless To the millions aghast at the theater Muted witness to the horror on life's stage Condemned to suffer through the antics of the few Someone tell me how do the blind become so famous?
I am never so bedeviled, vexed, speechless As when I wonder, how do the deaf become so famous? Oh they pretend they’ve heard But they miss every other word Then lecture on about cruelty and beauty
They go on endlessly about symphonies Despite the absence of one good clue If for a moment their ears Were miraculously cleared They'd hear the peddlers snickering all around them
- Chorus -
Try to imagine pigs could fly Or that dogs could learn to drive Suppose that chimps somehow were winning elections What if a bear could solo on trombone? Or answer the telephone? Why it makes a mockery of natural selection
I am humble, I know my limitations So it's fair to ask...how do the dull become so famous? They flash across the screen, show up in magazines You’d think stupidity was their sole qualification They can't tell crap from Christmas, can't tell left from right Put on the spot they know not king from queen nor rook from knight They spout as revelation the tritest observation Then scan the horizon like peacocks of genius