 Yep, y'all. I mean the guy Andrew shows we are the brilliant idiots podcast and this week's episode is brought to you by Squarespace. Squarespace is the all-in-one platform for building your brand and growing your business online. Stand out with a beautiful website. Engage with your audience and sell anything, your products, content you create, and even your time. From websites to online stores, the marketing tools, and analytics. Squarespace is the all-in-one platform to build a beautiful online presence and run your business. There are no hidden fees or price hikes. And all websites are optimized for mobile, OK? Head to squarespace.com slash idiot for a free trial. And when you're ready to launch, use offer code idiot to save 10% off your first purchase of a website or domain. Now let's start the show. Young Nyla is here. Yep. Hezzie is here. Yo, what's up? What's up, Hezzie? How was your weekend, man? I got to tell you something, man. Anxiety was playing tricks on me yesterday. What happened? I like your fit today, by the way. Thank you, man. I'm out here. I went to get an MRI. OK. Have you ever had an MRI? Come on, man. OK, of course. Come on, man. I know you got anxiety. Come on, man. You've been in the tube before? MRI, EKG, you know what I'm saying? What you want, man? OK, so I go to get the MRI, and you're stuck in the tube when you get the MRI, and they're just doing this like a, I'm not exactly sure what it is. I don't know if it's radio waves or microwaves or something, but they're shooting in parts of your body so they can get a stamp. That's some shoulder shit. OK, great show. OK, let's fucked up. And I'm in the tube, and all of a sudden, I start feeling as if I can't get a full breath. You opened your eyes? Well, I open my eyes. I close my eyes. I'm trying to just kind of fall asleep, and my brain is going. And then all of a sudden, it just feels like I can't get a full breath. And I understand that there's nothing impeding my breath. It's only my mind playing tricks on me. I'm literally thinking about your bulltooth. You might be claustrophobic, and I realize it. Maybe it's that. Yeah. You know, I'm going back to that time where I almost drowned, and I'm like, yeah. And then I did this interesting thing. I started thinking about a long time ago when girls used to come over to my apartment and give me a head. And. It relaxes you. I swear to God. Yeah, yeah, yeah. It relaxes me. Yeah. And I remember just in that moment, I'm stuck in this tube, and I'm like, oh my God, this is so uncomfortable. But I kept thinking about these girls who would come over, and they'd knock on my door, and I'd let them in, and they'd give me a head. And my breathing came back. That's exactly what you're supposed to do. And it is amazing the power. A therapist would tell you that. A therapist will say to you, think about girls who just throwed you up when you're actually in action. I think they'll tell you just think about things that make you happy. Yes. You know what I'm saying? Think about vacation. Think about your wife. Think about things. Just think about positive things. And then certain girls I thought about, and they were like, ooh, they were really stressful, and the breathing starts to go away. That's right. And then there are other girls that they really went at it. I believe that it's never the moment it's your feelings about said moment. Yes. So it's never the circumstance, right? Like a lot of times, we think it's the circumstance, and the reality is just the feeling you have of that circumstance, because it might trigger something else. But isn't that amazing that things that you think about can affect your actual physiology, the way that you breathe? Listen to what you said, though. You said something else that we kind of skipped over, but you was in the MRI. Yeah. You said you thought about the time. You was about to drown. Yeah. That claustrophobia you feel, that helplessness. That's what I'm saying. So you change that thought immediately by thinking about something that makes you feel good. Yeah. What other things could I think about besides that? Your wife being on stage, moments in your life that made you happy, we have a memory bank of things that make us happy. Think about things that calm you. For me, it's like beach. I always think about the beach. See, I started thinking about the beach, and I was like, fuck, I drown in that bitch. All right. You know what I mean? I would think about these things, and I'd be like, ooh, there's something stressful associated with it. So I started to go, what is the most selfless act that has ever been bestowed upon me? And it's a girl coming over and doing that with her. Was it the laying down that brought you there? We're men. Whoa, whoa, whoa. The what? She's right. What happened? What did you say? It's laying down in that position that made me think and feeling helpless. Oh, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. Toes curled, grabbing the sheets. By the way, that is a very selfless act. You have to be very trusting to let a random woman give you oral sex. That's true. What? That's not true. Are you kidding me about? Are you kidding? She could bite your fucking dick off. OK. I'm dead ass serious. Think about this as a man. I'm talking about. Think about this as a man, the last random person that we offered our penis cut the tip of it off. Whoa. Think about the anxiety. The last random person that we offered our penis snip the tip of it off. Think about the anxiety that we have. And the trust of it to be built. You didn't offer that though. What do you mean I didn't offer it? I hit him with the Goo Goo Gaga, slip it up. Actually, you didn't offer it, but somebody did something to you that they thought would be good for you. That's head. That's head. That's head. Well, I'm just saying I'm grateful. Somebody's doing something for you that they think would be good for you. I'm very grateful. You know what I mean? Women give you head if you don't want it. Say that one more time. Women give you head if you don't want it. Women give you head. If you don't want it. If you don't want it. And they think something's wrong with you if you don't want it. You know what's crazy? We think so highly of women. We call it giving us head. When they're sucking something out of it, they're taking really. Oh, no, it's giving. But we view it as a gift. They're definitely giving. Yeah, yeah, it's they giving. It's giving. Actually, we're giving. It's giving. We're giving. You're not giving shit. If you do, right? In fact, the only time I. At the end it gives. At the end, did you do it right? It does, if you do it correctly. I've never heard a man say I got some head. I'll always hear men say she gave me some head. But women, they made a fucking song about getting head. Wow. I was getting some head. I was getting some head. God damn, yo. It's crazy how sexist women are. And we don't even discuss it. And nobody's talking about this shit. Oh, it's sexist women are, you know? Apple! Sometimes I give you head. You give her the gift of the head. And then she going to go spit it out right in front of you. You give her the gift of the head. My god, man. Even now, you thought I was feeling you. You just a fucking munch. Imagine we called them munches after that. You spoke about women on this podcast. You spoke about getting head. And I once did you call a lady out her name, bro. Never once will I do that. Now once did you say she was just a suck? She was just a throw? You ain't say none of that, bro. I would never do that. That's because y'all not rappers. But rappers do it every day. We're not rappers. We're just married guys. Faithfully married men. Faithfully married men. We're happy. But when you lay back, you think about what brought you the most peace. I didn't think about peace. I thought about pure angelic kindness. And I'm just like, what is the most calming thing in the world? Hearing your doorbell buzz 2 AM, right? Hearing the girl walk to the door and you are doing those stretches. The mouth stretches. You are. I don't know what got into you today to have this anointing but continue. But I'm just saying, and I thought about the kind and I'd look through the peephole in my door and I'd see them out there. Ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha, ha. Bro doing like this, doing like this. I'm like, did she think we're gonna box or what the hell's going on? And then they come inside and then rain the heavens upon me. Rain the heavens upon me. Wipe away my sins of the day. If women looked at Felatio the way us men do, y'all wouldn't suck so many random dicks. Oh. You know what I mean? Y'all wouldn't just give that up so much. Oh, yep. Straight up. Isn't that, yep. I never felt like I need to snap after somebody said something right there. It's not like the same as getting boxed or one way more than that. Whoa, whoa, whoa, why are you talking about it like that? Well, like it's having sex. But getting boxed, like I would never refer to a woman's vagina like that. That's wild. It's not just a box. The way y'all don't respect yourself is crazy crazy. Yeah. Maybe that's why y'all are so sexist because you really hate yourself. It's unbelievable, yo. Why don't you talk about that? It's beautiful. A box, just a box. A box. What? A box. Is this put clothes in when I wanna ship something? Nah. Shut up. That is crazy. That is crazy. Yo, and then they get upset when we just send them out the house right afterwards. They ain't know what I'm saying. That's what you do with a box. You take a box and you send it somewhere else. Ship it out. Why don't you stop treating yourself like boxes? It's not what I meant. You might not get shipped out. Is it the same equivalence? One is higher than the other? What do you mean? Because you said if you knew what it meant to men, you wouldn't do it as often. But isn't like having sex the same? It's all, it's a part of it. Oh, you talking about men having random sex with women? Yeah. I don't know anything about that. We have to have sex with y'all or else y'all think we're gay. This is crazy. That's the thing that's fucked up. That's the other thing. We wouldn't even wanna have sex with y'all unless we're in love. That's right. But if we don't fuck y'all, y'all, oh, he's gay. That's right. Look at his color. That's not true. Can't even take a picture with a boy without being sex. Y'all do it for your friends. I was wrong with him though. I've heard many women say stories about how he got a little penis. That's why he don't want me to give him fallatio. You know what I'm saying? He's gay. Can I tell you a personal story about how crazy women are? Okay. I had a girl that wanted to give me a head when I was a youngster. I was just in high school, first year of high school. This girl was absolutely beautiful. She was in high school too? She was in high school too. Okay. Absolutely beautiful woman. I didn't have pubic hair yet. So you didn't want to show her your pubic hair? I didn't want to let her down. Word up, word up. I knew how much girls love pubic hair. Where, where, where, where? And I was worried that if I pulled my pant down there wasn't a big, thick, tough to pubic hair. Women do love pubic hair. I've heard a lot of women say the favorite part of pubic hair is just taking it out there. Hell yeah! You never heard that? Of course. What happened? You think you're gonna have a quinoa bowl? You're not gonna have a little suck between your teeth? You're gonna have some pubic hair to pluck that shit out? Come on, guys. Come on, y'all. Y'all act so surprised like Taylor Swift went in an award. You know this, you know this y'all already. Come on. Niggas said their favorite part. That's crazy. What do you mean? That's crazy. What do you mean? All I'm trying to say is you don't understand the insecurities that men feel. Well, I think that story's fair. Yeah, you should have just saved her and not show her anything. Oh, you didn't, I'm showing her. I didn't show her! That's right, that's right, that's right. You did the right thing. And what did she do to you? She called you, she shamed you for that? Yeah, she thought I was scared or she thought that I didn't like her. In your adult? She thought I was gay? Wow. Has that happened in your adult? I said lucky guess. Wow. I said lucky guess. Wow. You know what I mean? What do you mean? You know what I'm saying? Come on, y'all. Now he gotta pretend to be homosexual because he's ashamed. Teenage years sure that happened. Y'all think I'm gay but I don't have a fat tub of pubes? That's crazy. See what I'm saying? Come on. It's really crazy, y'all. It's really crazy, man. What else happened this weekend, man? We had a great weekend. I went to go see MJ the Musical. Love yourself. Did you see MJ the Musical? Of course I saw MJ the Musical. Talk to me about it, man. You talk to me, you just saw it. Hold on, I gotta text my wife and I'll talk. All right, I'll talk. Okay, go ahead, boom. No, no, it shows the power of the music. Yeah. It's so exceptional that you're willing to watch multiple fake MJs play MJ and then when they're out there, was it like the Dominican looking one, the light-skinned one? Which one, the lead? The lead, yeah. Browse Frost. Oh my God. In fucking incredible. It's just amazing. God damn. You shouldn't be able to act and dance that good and sing. You know what I couldn't be allowed. I was, you know, it's a lot of things I was thinking but I was like, what is his vertical? That motherfucker was jumping through the roof. Like I ain't thought about no shit like that unless I'm watching basketball. I've never looked at a man just performing on stage, jumping and be like, what is his vertical? Like the way he was bouncing, I'm like, was there a trampoline or something at certain parts of the stage? You don't think? Charlamagne, there's a whole part of the stage that he just shoots out of. I remember that part but there was another part where he was just bouncing, bruh, on some tickle from Winnie the Pooh shit. You didn't see that shit, yo? Go back and watch it again. You're gonna be like, damn. You're like the weirdest guy. You're the weirdest guy, bro. You're watching the history of Michael Jackson's life and the only thing you think about is how high can this Dominican jump? That motherfucker was bouncing, bruh. Like, yes. I had a look and I was saying. Bouncing is a wet part. Miles Frost. What song? It was at the end when it was like towards, it was at the end when everybody came out on stage and they just started performing like, I don't wanna sing random songs. I'm sure if you go again, it'll be the same songs. And they were bowing. Yes, man. That motherfucker was bouncing but I thoroughly enjoyed it just because, man. Yeah, that's him. Miles Frost. Pretty little motherfucker. Beast, man. Yes. Is that him right there? No, that's the other Michael. That's the middle Michael. All the Michaels did their job, man. No, middle Michael. No, no. But Miles Frost, he deserved to be. By the way, I hate you motherfuckers that Broadway that have to record, man. I hate anybody that goes to a place where they tell you not to record and y'all record. Like, I'm that guy. I literally called one of the ushers on somebody. Say, he's recording. Where he's going, y'all? Oh, my God. At the gate, this shit. Oh, my God. Charlotte. Let me tell you why. Because the ushers kept flashing the lights whenever people do that shit, right? And at the end, I'm looking at this motherfucker in front of me and he's just like, catching them at the end. Why you wanna fuck up somebody's moment? I hate that shit. How do you know that's not their family? I don't give a shit. If that's your family, that's all the more reason not to record. Why you wanna put this man- So you tattletale? Immediately. I look back. The guy called eyes of me. No! Somebody, y'all. You got any kidding, bro? I do like kidding. Charlotte, come on, Charlotte. Come on, Charlotte. What do we call black male keenies? That was some carrot shit. That was. Fuck that. I hate it, man. Stop fucking with people's art. You know what pissed me off about the Chris Rock special? The fact that that emancipation joke leaked the day before. Oh, wow. You know what I'm saying? I don't like that. Like, stop ruining people's routines. You work hard at this shit. That's facts, especially with comedy where, like, you need the surprise. Yes, man! With something like this, like, we know what happened in Michael Jackson's life. You know, so this is not about, oh, you're gonna surprise us with something, but I do understand what you're saying with the stand-up, yeah. Spend your money, come watch this show like the rest of our show. Bro, can I tell you my favorite part of that Michael Jackson musical? Talk to me. The thriller sequence. Oh, my God. Where they basically juxtaposed his father, Joe Jackson, as the monster in thriller, and then what is Michael becoming? Ooh. He's becoming his father. Ooh. And it's just, oh, it's so cool. I never look at thriller in that way. The other thing about that was a part of it, I just like- Like, he was, sorry to interrupt you, but, like, he got, he started treating the people that were working with him. He was working them to death. He was, the dancers don't have a break and the people designed to set don't have a break, and he's not realizing that he's taking on these traits from his dad that he hated. He's become what he wanted to be. He's become the monster. You know what I mean? That's thriller. But not just to the people around him, to himself. Michael didn't know how to disconnect because Joe pushed him like that. He only knew one way to go. Full steam ahead all the time, to the point it was killing him. Yo, I walked away from that shit saying like, yo, there's no such thing as perfect. And there was another part in the movie with a guy who was his manager was like, you gotta stop chasing your last success. Bro, Michael was a once, Michael achieved the feat that nobody in the history of life will ever achieve again. And sometimes you have to be okay with that. Selling a hundred million records of one album in a time when motherfuckers had to go buy tapes. I don't even know if CDs was out there. They had to go to the store. With CDs out there? I don't even think CDs was quite out there. They had to go to the store, bro. Come on, man. Yo, nobody will ever achieve that again. That is a once in a lifetime, life changing success. You make the most money you're ever gonna make. You create the most generational wealth you're gonna create. And then you take that money and do other things. But he thought that was the bar. Yeah, but you can't help it. It was for him. But my favorite part was when the manager was saying, it's about music makes great stories, not the artist. But it's funny because Kim Osario and a lot of journalism and hip hop are like, what's the story behind the person today? So it's like times have changed. We're back then. Oh yeah, now you want the engaging character and then the music is kind of like an excuse to engage. It's like an accessory, honestly, at this point. Real talk. If your life is interesting enough, people will enjoy your music because it's a reflection of that life. It's almost like everybody's a reality star. Yeah. That's what happened to Michael. Michael got to the point where his life became bigger than anything he could possibly do in the music. Like Michael got to the point where you wanted to know everything about Michael. You didn't care how good the music was because the music never stopped being great. Bad was good. Dangerous was good. But when he started all the plastic surgery and he walking around with bubbles and he's sleeping with the elephant man's bones. Is he in an oxygen chamber? Is he a pedophile? All of this shit. You care about all these other things other than his music. Michael Jackson became bigger than any music he could ever put out. That is facts, bro. And they didn't touch that pedophile story at all. I'm glad they didn't. I really didn't even want them to touch the pill that much either. Touch the what? The pills. The pills were part of it because that's what that's the pills are part of it because during the dangerous tour because that's when I think that's if I'm not mistaken that's the last one he was preparing for. With the MTV girl. And that's what pushed him to even get on those pills so much and the anesthesia and everything else. The last one was The dangerous tour. No, no, no. It was one, what was one more time? What? Oh yeah. This is it. This is it. I think it's it. This is it. It was a tour he was working. So what tour was he working on in the dark? That was way back. That was like 90s I think that. Oh, got you, got you, got you. Nah, I'm glad they didn't show his death. I'm glad they did. I'm glad they let us get lost in the music and lost in how the music made you feel. I mean, it is, dude, it sounds corny to say it, but you're sitting there and the energy around the music, it's like every single person there was singing. Everybody was clapping. I haven't seen that much connectivity in a Broadway play ever. Because that's our era though. That's our era though. Bro. It's different when you go see musicals of music you came up on. I ain't no none of them songs in Hamilton. Like if it's Bruce Springsteen's play, everybody was probably singing that shit too. Yeah, go crazy. Like Hamilton, those were original songs. I didn't know none of them shit goes though. But when you in there and you hear Thriller and you hear it, Billy Jean and all that shit. Oh my God, man. And I'm glad they didn't touch on the little boy shit because I don't want to think about that while I'm singing. And I think Michael was innocent. I do not think Michael Jackson touched those little boys in no way shape or form. You entitled to think that, bro. You know what I'm saying? That man was investigated by the FBI for 17 fucking years. That FBI and they found nothing. It's the FBI investigated you for 17 years. They investigated YSL for 17 months. And they got everything. You know what I'm saying? So they investigated you for 17 years. You think they're not gonna find nothing? Yeah. Not a phone call, a little boy breathing over something? Yeah. Come on man, stop. Michael was innocent. And the two men said when they were younger that their parents put them up to it. You know what I mean? Yeah. But then they recanted that much later in life and did the documentary and everything, whatever. I think Michael was innocent. I'm entitled to my opinion. And I think everybody should go see MJ the musical. It's really fun. It is phenomenal. The story is fine. Like they put together a story. You gotta find a way to root for somebody and make him the underdog in a situation where he's clearly not the underdog. He's like an incredibly wealthy guy. So they're like, the story's basically like, will they be able to build the contraption that shoots him out of the ground? Not before, but then he's like, I really want it. And then this guy's like, we can't afford it. He goes, I don't care, sell the house. But not before. Even before though. That was like in the middle. Maybe they started doing that towards the middle. Right, but I'm saying like, that's the reason why you're kind of like holding on. That's the arc that they're trying to stay where he goes, I'm willing to put up, I'm really a mortgage, never land, you know what I mean? And they have to find a way to. He leveraged that too. Yeah, yeah. I like the beginning of it too. Cause you know, even though he was a child star, there was that period where it was like, what do I do next? You know what I'm saying? How do I become an adult? Well, dude, I was thinking about this. I'm thinking about this a lot. Like you have to continue to evolve in everything. And I think, and I'm not as familiar with the Beatles music as like, obviously a Super Beatles fan. But one thing that I talk to Beatles fans about is and that they often say is that the Beatles would continually evolve. Very overrated group if you ask me. You could say that, that's fine. I'm not John, Sting, whoever else is in the Beatles. I'm not debating whether they're overrated or not. I am saying that they went from one type of music and then did a completely different one and then another completely different one. And that takes immense balls. And I have no idea cause I've never heard a song. That's fair, that's fair. That's fair. No, no, don't get into the thing. He's doing his whole thing. It's okay, it's fine, it's fine, it's fine. He took the bait and we were just moving right past it. So what I admire about that is like, it's very easy like, for example, like I'll give you an example of stand up for this next tour that I eventually will go on when I put it all together. Right now, like I'm writing. And it was really hard for me when I started writing new stuff. It was really hard. And I was like, why is this hard? And I specifically thought it was like, I don't wanna just do a different version of the jokes I've done before. And this happens a lot in music. It happens a lot in different genres where you have something that works and you just go, okay, I'm gonna like remix it and it'll be similar topics and similar ideas, whatever like that. And I was like, no, I really want to evolve. I wanna talk about something else. I want to reflect more of my personal life. I want to reflect on like the change that's happened in my life. There's a lot that's happened that's different than it was four years ago. And I think the artists that continue there that have this amazing longevity look at like a Jay-Z. Like this amazing longevity is their art is reflecting where they are in their life. So when we see them, we go, oh, it's not that same shit I heard a bunch of times. It's, oh, this is new. You're talking about investment in art? Yeah, we can call it corny or yeah, we can call it rich people problems or whatever. Or we can go, wow, that's kind of cool that you're reflecting the level you're on instead of just trying to repeat the success you had. Very interesting and you're absolutely right. And you can look at it a couple of ways because there's artists like a Jay-Z who at one point dropped the album every year. But every album to your point, when you listen to it, you can, you know exactly where Jay-Z is at in his life at that moment. But then you can look at somebody like a Chris Rock who said he always gives himself time to go live life. So when you speak about evolution, if I'm 20 and I put out a stand up special, if I write another special within that year it's probably gonna still sound like you went through all the same shit you have all your opinions about those things, et cetera. And eventually if you keep on doing the same shit over a long amount of time, it sounds like you're doing an impression of yourself. Musically, comedically, any of these things. Also he would just look a little corny trying to keep up with the time. Yeah, I'm more interested, I don't know the way I've always looked at stand up is like the bigger you get, the more personal it can get. Because now people are investing your life in the beginning I thought, well who the fuck am I? Why does somebody care about my day? I wanted to talk about the topics, I wanted to talk about the issues because I didn't have the arrogance to be like, everybody should shut up and just listen to me tell my story about what happened when I bumped into a homeless person. But eventually when you get some fans, you get some fame, you can explore this part of yourself because these people invested in your life, they wanna know what's going on in your life. You think the podcast ruined that for stand ups? I think it made it better because I think that they're even more invested and they understand kind of who you are as a three dimensional person. But being that you give so much of your personal life in your stand up, I mean in your podcast every week, when you're actually sitting down to write your stand up, did your mind say, oh you already said that? Well, I think what my mind says that now about topical shit. So it was like before where I'd write a bunch of topical jokes, I'm just like, no I'm gonna get these takes out on a pod. I don't, I have an avenue where millions of people are gonna see it. So I can get my topical takes out, you and I can fucking riff, we can go on flag when we can riff and just write these funny, not write these, but like think up of these funny takes or whatever and I feel that satisfied. And then my stand up can reflect kind of like how I'm relating to the world. So this is like Jim for you and then practice. Yeah, and I'll be honest on stage too. But like I was really frustrated, I'll be honest in the beginning, I was like really frustrated, I was like, the fuck is going on? And then I had to like sit back and reflect. And I was like, oh, it's supposed to be frustrating. This is new. You're reflecting on your life in a different way. Are you giving yourself enough time? Maybe you're not giving yourself enough time. I haven't locked in anything. I'm not, I take this, yeah, I don't want to tour until it is, it is ready. Yeah. It is something I'm really proud of. That might be three years from now. Maybe. And that's fine. There's no rush. There's no rush, that's why I like when Kendrick takes his time between albums. I told my agents, I literally said, I was like, listen, I'm not agreeing to a tour. I'm not putting on a tour just yet. I'm going to do these shows and I'm going to work out this material and continue to work out. I'm working out in the city every single week, but I'm not going to tour because there's a dollar amount attached to it. I'm going to tour because I built something I'm really proud of and I want to share it with people. That's the time that happens. And it takes time to do that. Yeah. I could go through like a growth spurt where I go, okay, this is awesome. I got 20 new minutes. I'm really proud of. And I could go through months where I'm like, God damn, man, I can't get this thing to work. And that's part of it. Don't force it, man. Exactly, that's part of it. I think the rarest, the hardest thing to do nowadays is entertain people for real. I'm not even joking. For us to go to Broadway and watch a Broadway play, that's why I get mad at the person recording it. Like enjoy the moment. Yeah, take it, man. Because this motherfucker's entertaining you for real. You know what I mean? The reason I still like stand up because people are purposely crafting hours to go out there and entertain you for real. You know what I mean? We live in an era, this shit don't take nothing to entertain a motherfucker. I can just go on my phone and watch a motherfucker farting in a bag and then putting it to somebody's face and everybody. I die laughing every time. It's amazing. Come on, it's hilarious. But my point is it's very hard to strictly entertain. Andrew's trying to avoid talking about Chris Rock's stand up special. Because he don't like talking about other people's stand up specials. But he's gonna talk about it today, you know what I mean? Chris Rock's stand up special that we saw this weekend, selective outrage. That's the other thing I saw. I saw a lot of good entertainment this weekend. Thoughts, whoever wants to go first. Nila hated it because she's 12. I didn't hate it. I did not hate it. I told you, my dad called me saying how amazing it was. But the first half of it was him like going in on his daughter. So I thought my dad was like being subliminal. This is the fucking team. Pop time out. This is why it's hard to entertain. Not even just hard to entertain, hard to do anything in front of these cameras because people don't actually allow themselves to feel what's happening. All they do is project their feelings about what's happening onto you. But once you got past the daughter part, I liked it. I just think people, we don't even allow ourselves time to digest anything. Now, everybody loves the last 10 minutes of Chris Rock special, right? I'm not talking about the 10 minute part. I like where he's talking about storming the Capitol, taking America back. I thought that was great. Those are my favorite parts. But everybody likes the will thing. If you went into this special, wanting to hear Chris talk about will, did you pay attention to anything else? If all you can think about is when are you gonna talk about will? When are you gonna talk about will? Are you allowing yourself to feel anything else, to hear anything else? But he walked us into it with the foreshadow and like, I don't want to prom with no rappers, with the Jay-Z and the Beyonce thing. I think he did a good job with the foreshadow. Break your rule, Schultz. Schultz does not like talking about other people's things. I don't, yeah, like if comedians are in the news, I like talking about that. But I don't like talking. He's in the news. He's all over the news. You know, he's in the news for other things. Like the Will Smith slap thing we talk about all the time. But comedians art, you know, gets enough criticism and that kind of stuff. I just like the comedians art to speak for itself. And I like to hear non-comedians talk about it. But you have to understand, like this, I know what it's like to go through to create an hour and to put it out there in front of people. It's an incredibly vulnerable situation. So as comedians, it's hard for us to just go and like go and pick apart these things. I thoroughly enjoyed it. I've seen that set. It's my third time seeing the set. I saw it last summer at the garden and I saw it last month in North Charleston. I saw it last summer at the garden. He had no Will Smith material. And I saw it last month in North Charleston. He had a lot of that Will Smith material. You know what I'm saying? He didn't have the emancipation joke, which y'all can kiss my ass. I thought was hilarious. Man, were people upset about it? Yes, you know what I mean? I thought that joke was funny as fuck. People were actually upset about it? Um... It's about the movie and the whipping. Yeah. For concussion. I didn't know Jada Finke called him and told him not to do that show. Not to host, yeah. She started the whole show. I'm not gonna say everybody knew that, but people, yeah, mad people knew that. You know what I mean? That's terrible. The emancipation joke was funny when he said he was so mad at Will that he watched the emancipation just to see him get whipped. That's a joke. It was funny. It's a joke from a comedian. It's a hilarious joke. I don't even understand why people take that as anything literal. He's not literally getting whipped in the movie either. Exactly. Nothing about this is real. Nobody's hurt. He's not even making fun of slavery. Yeah. It's just an impremise. It says, like, verbally. Like, I watched the emancipation. The watch was gonna get whipped. Like, what, come on, man. You know what I mean? He could have said, I watched Ali again just to watch him lose the Frasier. Like, anything, you know? Yeah. It bothered me a little bit just the lie factor. Because the internet told you too. No, no, no. The lie factor. Because the internet told you too. No. Just the fact that he stumbled over that joke. So he, like, he kind of gave up the... Punchline, yeah. The punchline before he hit it. The lie factor. Wait, wait, I don't remember that. Yeah, he said... But he said the wrong name. He goes... It's called concussion. See, I didn't even notice it, because I saw it on the internet the day before. Okay. And everybody told me it was a emancipation. So I didn't even notice it was a concussion. In the live version, and this is the obvious to the risk of doing something live. In the live version, he says, he goes, he goes, Jada, Jada didn't want me to host the Oscars because her husband wasn't nominated for... was emancipation. Yeah. Oh, he meant to take concussion. He meant to take concussion. The punchline is then concussion later. So he even says in the special, he goes, he goes, oh, I fucked up the joke. Yeah. And then it kind of fucked up... He didn't even fuck up your emancipation joke, though. It did because... He said that movie before. It was supposed to come back. He was supposed to say that movie. Yeah. Yeah. See, I didn't even catch that. Yeah. To your point about live, I would never do a live stand-up. Yeah. I guess my feeling with the live stand-up thing is that, like, it doesn't... I understand creating a gimmick for someone to watch your special. I think that that makes sense. Mm-hmm. That's marketing and that's smart. If he didn't have the Will Smith thing, do it live. Because now you have a gimmick, people go, well, I just want to see what could happen if he does it live, right? No, I don't like live stand-up. Well, just take this in. But he already had a hook, the most powerful hook in stand-up history. Everybody wants to see what he did. Everybody wants to see what he did. So don't add more pressure on the moment. Yeah. Just record four shows to use the best show, cut them together, do whatever you want. Do it. Nobody's watching it to see if you're going to get the words right or not. We want to watch you deliver your best performance. So that's what I would have wished they focused on. Right there. Yeah, I wish they... I hope that they did tape, you know, him throughout his talk. He wore the same thing every show he did. Yeah. He wore the white suit with the Prince thing. So he did that. He's been doing that since last year at the guard. Yeah. So I hope they do put out this special in the way it's supposed to be taped. But I wonder if he did the live thing just for him. I think everybody's saying, oh, he did that for Netflix. Maybe he did that to challenge himself. Maybe. You know what I'm saying? He was going to get 20 million from Netflix, regardless. I agree with that. I feel like he's trying to test his skill on the art. Yeah. It wasn't like it was a pay-per-view where they was paying for it. You know what I mean? I think he did that. Let me go out here and do this. I want to do this. By the way, he did create a spectacle. For the law of the policy, you got to create a compelling spectacle. When have we ever seen everybody tuned into a stand-up special? Like it's a sporting event. Yeah. All the years we've watched stand-up specials on these big networks, these big platforms. And don't get me wrong, social media wasn't around for the Rawls and all of that back in the day. But the fact that everybody was tuned in on a Saturday night to this shit like it was a sporting event, that's great for comedy. But it's not because it's live. I think it was because it was live. Yeah. Everything live. Everything live on social media is different shows. That's not true. I'll be honest with you. I'll be honest with you. It's not true. He never got that many people watching that shit at one time like that on a Saturday night. Yes, he would have. Nah. It's not because it's live. It's because of what happened. It's because of what happened. If they had just put this shit on Netflix, people would have watched it. But when everybody gathers around at one time to watch something, there's nothing like it on social media. Bro, I know. The whole reason why we did the release, the way that we did for my last special was specifically for it. There was a short window where you could watch it because I wanted everybody to watch it at the same time. All right. Right? And that was the issue with Netflix specials and specials in general is that they would just sit there and everybody would get to them while they could. So I wanted to create some scarcity. Like, this is only up for now. So live does do that. Don't get me wrong. But people weren't tuned in because it was live. They were tuned in because one of the greatest comics ever was about to deliver his revenge on a man who slapped him in the face and publicly humiliated. True, but they were tuned in because it was live, bro. It all goes hand in hand. It's both. It's definitely both. Sure, it's percentages. He doesn't even do that live without that hook. Probably like 60, 40. 10%. He don't even do that live without that hook. Don't, doesn't do what? He doesn't do the show live without the Will Smith hook to it. Agreed. What does that mean? I don't understand. He doesn't go live if he doesn't have the Will Smith angle. If there's no Will Smith angle to this, like, oh, he got slapped at the Oscars, hasn't spoke about it in the year. He doesn't even go live. He just doesn't, especially like he's been doing it and puts it out. The fact he's got the Will Smith hook, let's bring everybody in. And I bet you the numbers for Saturday night was crazy. Yeah. There's no question. I, yeah, I just wouldn't do it. I just, and you said the same shit. I don't like, I do not like live stand up. I want to see. You like live stand up. I like, yes. You just don't like watching it live through the TV. Yes. But I'm a comedy connoisseur, so I go to comedy shows. So being that I go to comedy shows, I know what they expect. I know it's not perfect. I know they're going to be crowd work. I know they might stumble over shit and come back to it. When I'm watching it on TV, I don't want to see that because for the people who don't watch stand up, they're overly critical of it. But I still think he did a great job. I thought he bodied it. I thought it was, I thoroughly, thoroughly enjoyed it. He had some great bars. Great bars. He had some great bars. No question. And yeah, it's just a, listen, it was great to see that many people interested in stand up. It's great that he created an event that people were curious about. And it's great that he got to finally in Baltimore and then finally reflect on like, what happened and use his comedic genius to execute it. Now somebody texted me and said, yo, you know that whole shit when he went off script and was calling Jada a bitch and saying, everybody call him a bitch. You know that was, you know he winged that, right? And I'm like, first of all, I said, who told you that? And he was like, nah, somebody that was dead told me backstage. I was like, I was in North Charleston last month. He did the same exact thing, including the shout outs. Because I started to correct him and be like, I never called Will Smith a bitch. But I'm like, wait a minute. I gotta get my name in this special. Yeah. Like, wait a minute. This might be for the special. I'm like, it's February. Special comes out next month. I know this ain't, this ain't off the cuff. Yeah. You mind my goddamn business? By the way, white people love Chris Rock. What do you mean? What do you mean? Man, I had some white people texting me. I had one white person texting me who was very, very, very, very powerful human. And he was like, man, just heard Chris Rock shot you out. And he put very, very, very, very impressed. And I'm like, what is he impressed about? The special? Just him shot me out. I don't know what it was. He's impressed that you're getting a shout out. I will say that's cool about Chris Rock, is that getting a Chris Rock shout out in a special feels like a rapper putting you in his bars. You know, like... Which rapper though? Like a fire rapper, like... Depends which rapper. I've been mentioned by a lot of rappers. But you remember the first time you were mentioned by someone you respect? And how you felt? Somebody I respect? Yeah, I do actually. It was T.I. And wasn't that cool? Yeah, T.I. said in the bar, he said, I'm a guy like Charlemagne. It was one of his mixtapes. I forgot which one it was. Absolutely. But that's cool. Like he shot out Jason Momoa. It's different though. What do you mean? It's different. I'll give you an example. Chris Rock's special is more like Drake dropping back to back. It's an event. Ah, it's new. You know what I'm saying? Everybody's tuned in to this event. It's one... You get mentioned in the rap bar. It's cool. Oh, that was though. That's my man. But when it's an event that everybody's paying attention to, it's a different ballgame. It can immortalize you in a different way. Yeah, for sure. I guess what I'm saying, that's awesome. They're like... I'm just mad that Chris didn't tell people to give me anything. Like I still get bottles now because of Drake. Oh, yeah. Right. Like I could be in a random restaurant and somebody would send me a bottle. And then they'll be like, what do I do over there? And you'd be like, bottles this year? Especially Indians for some reason. They like that. Oh my, that's unbelievable. Classy individuals, man. Yeah. I don't know. I just thought that that was cool. I thought creating the event was great. And unbelievable. Building the hype was great. Executing the revenge is great. And being at a stage where if you talk about somebody, if you say their fucking name, they're excited. You know what I mean? It's cool to be mentioned by this guy. So I thought that was great. Absolutely. He didn't call and let you know he's gonna do that. You found out while watching. Well, I saw it last month. Yeah. I saw it when he did it at the North Charlotte Coliseum. I know. I'm asking about then. Oh, no, no, no, no. No, he ain't saying nothing. I mean, I could have never called Will Smith a bitch. Not that I remember. I don't think I did. Don't ruin the joke, bro. But I thought the point of it was that it was in joke. No, it was in joke, bro. Think about who he named. You think the view called Will Smith a bitch? Like, come on. Now, did I have my thoughts about the whole entanglement red table talk thing? Yes, we talked about that, but I never called him a bitch. But either way, I appreciate the shout-out. I thought it was fantastic. I think it's great. I think it's great. And I just enjoyed the special overall. And I'm looking forward to everybody else because, like I said, I saw Kevin's new material, which will probably change because Chris has changed. Chris's royal family shit was funny. But the shit he said last summer was even funnier. And I know he changed it because the queen died. Oh. You know what I'm saying? Like, he had like three bars about the whole queen thing. And it was what made it so dope is it was based off personal experience. Yeah. Because he's Chris Rock. He's been famous for a long time. I'm not going to step on it because he didn't put it in the special. But, you know, like, he had a bit in there about the queen that made that whole shit even funny. Wait, couldn't you say it now, though, since... What do you mean? I mean, couldn't you say it now? He's not going to use those bars. I mean, if he didn't use it, I don't want to say it. You know what I'm saying? Like, I'll tell y'all after the podcast. But it was funny. Dave's new shit is funny. And to your point, it's super personal. Yeah. But that probably will change because his father passed away. You know what I mean? Dave's new shit is super personal. Yeah. Because, I mean, when you offend every other community, you have nothing else to talk about but yourself now at this point. You know what I mean? I'll be honest. I think that's where... I think that's where comedy goes. Haven't it always, though? I feel like it always. No, not necessarily. Because if you look at guys like Chris Rock, like, crisis like Chris Rock have, you know, exploded early on by having, like, great topical takes on the issues that were, like, plaguing society, right? Issues on race and politics and, you know, gender dynamics. Mm-hmm. George Carlin, same thing. Politics, right? Race. And, like, you look at those people and they were a voice at a time where many people were voiceless. Yeah, yeah, yeah. There wasn't Twitter. There wasn't Instagram. There wasn't YouTube videos. No, you're right, yeah. Now we live in a time... Antopis didn't feel so dated. Exactly. Now we live in a time where the topical, Joe, everybody's gonna have a take. You're dealing... You're dealing with 100 million people on the Internet. Mm-hmm. Like, people are gonna have your same take about Chris Brown, the same take about Beyonce, the same take about the Ohio disaster. Like, it's impossible to not share a take about something. So how do you make yourself more unique? How do you separate yourself? And I think it's just what is happening to you personally. Yeah. And I think that's just where at least comedy specifically is gonna go. Yeah, y'all still pissing me off with this Chris Rock is anti-Black thing. And this Chris... Bro, I saw a great tweet about that. It said, How are you gonna wear all white and this two Black women? Listen, there's so much we can say about that. But man, are you really gonna be mad at Chris Rock for using the B word? Do I think you should call all women the B word? No. But goddamn, have you checked your favorite rapper lately? Yeah, I know. You know what I mean? And you're proving his... Selective outrage. Exactly. This is what I think people are really mad about Chris Rock. Because he's calling you on your shit. Yeah. We're all hypocrites. We all use selective outrage. We can look at one person doing one thing, the other person doing the other thing. And if we like this person, we ignore that. But if we don't like this person, we go at that. All he did was hold a mirror up to us, and now we're mad that he held the mirror up to us. Yeah. Because there's no way in hell you're gonna sit here and now all of a sudden tell me, he shouldn't have called that woman the B word. Yeah. Really? Yeah. Really? I mean, if that's your issue? That's your issue? You've listened to all of these different guys call different women B words. I mean prominent women, too. Just say you like Will Smith, dude. Just say you like Will Smith. Just say you like Jada. Like, if we get it, you're just trying to find a way to discredit this dude. But nah, that's not it. Even at the end when he said, and you don't, my mama told me you don't fight in front of white people. In front of white people. Yeah. And everybody was like, see this proves that he cares what white people think. All of y'all do. No. I did not hear that. I did not hear that. You didn't hear what? That people were complaining about that. Oh, no, there were people complaining about that. And I thought that was we stop each other from fighting in front of white people. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? Like how many times in front of white people? Y'all don't do that. Don't do that in front of white people. Wait, why is that? Why don't you want to fight in front of white people? For me, it's because white people already have a perception of you. And by the way, if they have that perception of you, they're probably going to have that perception regardless. You know what I mean? You don't want to feed into an area to confirm it. Absolutely. 100%. 100%. So it's weird to me that I've seen people, whether you've said that you hate them or whether your actions show it. You know what I mean? Are you saying it in other ways? Get mad at him. So white people think that you fight, that black people fight, like, explain like family fights? What do you mean? I don't know. It could be anything. I just think it's the stereotype of black people, especially black men, being dangerous and being violent. Oh, okay. You know what I mean? So let's not reinforce that in front of anybody. You know what I mean? Okay, gotcha. This is so strange to me as if white people aren't violent as fuck. Do you know what I'm saying? They don't even got to just be fighting. It could be like a kid crying in the store. Like, don't cry to these people around. Like, it's like... Really? Don't show off in front of these people. Yeah, you just gotta... You got to be the best self. Who are these people? We know who these people are, okay? But yes, go watch The Special if you haven't. I don't want them to put out the live, though. What would you like? They edited the audio already. Oh, they did? Yeah. So if you watched it live, the audio sent... Like, it was a little hollow in the room. Now the audio that's out, like the room feels a bit more full. Yeah, I don't want to... I'd rather them take different times. He's done that material to the best of his ability and put it together. Oh, yeah. Yes. You know what I'm saying? That's what I would want. That's what The Special is. That's what The Special should be. That's what The Special is. They say, well, Smith been trying to reach out to Chris and, you know, Chris said the opposite. Chris said he called him. He didn't call him back. In The Special? That's in The Special. You know what I'm saying? Why would he lie about that? Why not? It's The Special. You tell the truth at every joke in your special. Every single one. But Chris might call him back now. I'm not calling you back when I got this hot material. Yeah. Oh, yeah, yeah. You're not going to stop this train. No, no, no. We're not about to have no convo and say, apologize, my bad. And then you see me six months from now letting these bars go. I get back to you after The Special. Now we can apologize. Now we can apologize. Now we can talk. Now we can reconcile. I slap back. Fair enough. Creed III, broke box office records. The Alexes. The Alexes should grin. Yo. Yo. Yo. Yo. We should do like a, that's first of all amazing. I think they did like a hundred million dollars. Highest grossest sports movie of all time. Of all time. Absolutely incredible. Which is crazy to call that a sports movie, though. I mean, it's about a sport, Charles. Creed was phenomenal, bro. That's a phenomenal movie, bro. Keep saying that so they serve you a last lap. Chill out. What happened in the last lap? What happened in the last lap, bro? What happened to Michael B. Jordan's bar in New York? Nothing. Nothing. What happened to his bar? Michael pressed you? No. He was in town last week. He pressed you in last lap? No. What happened, bro? No. We're not doing that. Come on, bro. No. Stop it. You ain't got no beef patty, bro? What happened in the last lap? I went in there trying to put the beef and beef patty. And Michael doesn't know if Michael didn't serve him. No. God damn. Michael. I'm talking about New Jersey, baby. So, hold on. So, you're really banned from last lap? Nope. Nope. I don't know. Come on, bro. I'm not going to put that on nobody. He pressed you and kicked you out? Nah. Nothing. Nothing happened at last lap. He's making shit up. Alex is not welcome in the last lap. He's not getting no service in the last lap. Wow. Michael left him in Alex because Michael banned Alex. What? And you know, Michael B. Never mind. You see? Damn, Charles. I was ready for you. I know you bailed me out. There you go. I was really trying. I was ready to go. See? I'll go, Charles, baby. No. I was shooting. You were shooting, bro. I didn't know what you were doing. I was fucking dribbling. Some shit. I didn't get that shot. That was a sports movie right there. Back to Alex. No, no, no. Charles, keep joking. So, Alex is in this bar. First of all, we've been to this establishment. Can you stop? Last lap, phenomenal establishment. Great place. I'm never going to tell you shit, bro. Did Michael press him or not? No, Michael wasn't there. But I just want to let you know, now I don't feel safe in that establishment. I brought UFC Champion Israel at this Sonya to that establishment. We brought Izzy there for a lovely meal. We've supported this establishment. That was before you called that man gay instead you could whip his ass. We never called him gay. First of all, I never say he's gay. You're a liar. We said two on one. No, I said I could beat him up. Oh, I said two on one. What is happening? Two on one, what? Last week, Alex and Andrew said Michael B. Jordan and Jonathan Major were gay. No, I said the pictures were gay. They said their pictures were gay. That's gay. And then I told them that if y'all can't beat their ass, shut up. And then Alex and Andrew, I said Andrew, that's cool. Alex and Andrew are Alex and Andrew. Both said they can kick Michael B. Jordan ass. Two on one. Respectfully. They ain't no two on one. We said two on one. We said two. Boxing match. Just straight up boxing match. Now, now I know when the whole last lap thing happened. Because there was a random tweet that came through the group chat this week. And it was Alex saying, yo, nah, y'all don't want no problems with Michael B. Jordan. I don't read this shit. Don't fuck him back right now. That is true. That is true, man. Oh, god damn. I'm just not texting none of y'all. I like the photos. You like what? The photos. You said the photos were gay. There's nothing wrong with it. Talk to me. What is wrong with the photos? I thought you said that last week y'all said the photos look gay. But there's nothing wrong with being gay. There's nothing wrong with being gay. I'm not saying that. I'm just saying I like the photos. You can like gay things. But think about that. No, this is a good point. This is a good point. Broke back mountain. Great movie. This is a good point. Nila's a woman. And I saw mad women reposting them pics. So who cares what y'all think? If all the ladies like it. Hey, 100 million people went or whatever. The movie made $100 million. It doesn't like hello. That's right. Friday, 9.19 p.m. Okay, Michael B. got hands. Give me like six months with a dedicated boxing coach. And I got him. Jonathan, I want no parts of. And I said, no, no, no. You gon' meet Kilmongan again. No, no. We never said Jonathan B. We never said Jonathan B. Jonathan with Jonathan B. Not Jonathan B. majors. Is it Jonathan B. majors? Jonathan B. ass kicking. That's what it's going to be. I believe it. I didn't say I could beat up Jonathan majors. We never said that. And then Schultz, you know Schultz forever, the I can do heart surgery. Andrew, I can do heart surgery. Schultz says, if I'm honest, I'm fucking them both up. Let's pay some bills, guys. Why y'all act like I can't box? That's what I'm trying to understand. You can box. Listen, plenty of boxes get knocked out. That's the whole point of boxing. Two people can box. You're right. That's the whole point of boxing. You're right. Andrew got hands. Can you beat Michael B. Jordan? I think he could. Have you seen their shapes? I think he could. Have you seen their shapes? Even in the magazine code. They talk about how they train. No, it's not. I'm sure he got you gas, bro. They worked out three times a day. Andrew Wheeze beating Anthony Joshua got you gas, bro. It's not a box. It's not a box. It's not a box. It's not a box. Drew B. in the gym, bro. When I put these paws in the room. Drew B. in the gym, son. We'll get you an opportunity. You'll be doing bodies, yoga, all the shit. In all seriousness. In all seriousness. In all seriousness. In all seriousness. In all seriousness. In all seriousness. In all seriousness. It's not about how you built. It's really, if you honestly want to know. Conditioning. It's conditioning is massive, but it's really about how you handle punches. How comfortable you are by being a tech. Because most people gas out, not only from throwing the punches, but from holding their breath when they're getting punched. That's everything. And like, I just don't know how much fighting they've both actually done. We're not talking about hitting the mitts. Everybody looks great on the mitts. Like, how long have you been in there? How comfortable are you getting hit in the fucking face? Your guy, what's your guy named? The boxer that trained Michael. Tom, you said his name on the podcast last week. Who? The one that accidentally knocked him out. Oh, Tony Balu. Tony Balu said, Michael B. Jordan is so good. It's scary. He said, and he said that if he trained Michael for six months, Michael could go in there. It could beat. I mean, I'd say that too if someone was paying me, man. Yep. Wow. You know what I mean? Exactly. I want to still be in the movies. I want to still be in the movies. They try to self-suffce one of these guys out there. What is he supposed to be like? Oh, nice. 20th guy in America. 20th guy in America without even trying. Who? You. Who? Who? Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Yo, your name is great to say when you're exasperated. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Like, you have a perfect name when somebody says something to you. If people were last calling me when they fucked up. Charlemagne. When something goes, Charlemagne. Charlemagne. What you calling me for? What the fuck? What the fuck am I supposed to do? Charlemagne. You're calling on me when they in trouble and calling me to blame they trouble on. Oh, really? Oh, my God. Why? Who's blaming their trouble? It was Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. and expertise in a way that fits their brand. With member areas, you can unlock a new revenue screen for your business and free up time in your schedule by selling access to gated content, like videos, online courses and newsletters, add online booking and scheduling for your classes or sessions to your Squarespace website. Clients can easily see your availability or reschedule if needed. Taking the house is a lot of coordinating calendars, all right? Create pro-level videos effortlessly. The Squarespace Video Studio app helps you make and share engaging videos to tell your story, grow your audience and drive sales. 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I wanna tell everybody to make sure to get your tickets for the Black Effect podcast festival happening April 22nd at the Pullman Yards in Atlanta, Georgia. For all people who love podcasts, man, you've been to live podcast events. This is just a festival vibe. We're gonna have food. We got my man, DJ Louis V, providing the soundtrack. When I say we have food, there's gonna be food trucks and vendors out there. We got the Black Effect marketplace. There's gonna be Black Effect merchandise as well. It's merchandise from your favorite podcast that'll be there like the 85 South Show, horrible decisions with Mandy and Weezy, reasonably shady with Giselle and Robin, the Checking In podcast with Michelle Williams. You know, I'm not doing no type of festival or anything without having a mental health aspect to it. So Michelle Williams will be there doing her podcast. That is all about her people's mental health, Checking In. The Big Facts podcast being ATL. So you know, we gotta have Big Bank, Baby Jade and DJ Scream. And it's hosted by myself and Jess Hilarious. So tickets are available right now, man. Wherever you get tickets, you can go to blackeffect.com for more info, but it's April 22nd in Atlanta on a Saturday in the daytime, the first ever Black Effect podcast festival. It's happening, okay? Okay, and make sure you scream 88 too, man. Thank you to everybody that's been watching 88, the movie on various streaming platforms. It's on Apple TV right now and it'll be available on all streaming platforms on March 24th, all right? Okay, now let's get back to the show. Job and Ramp, man. What do you think, Schultz? It's pretty awesome. He's a point guard wanting to be a shooting guard? Hey. What's awesome about that? No, I just think it's awesome, to be honest. The tricky thing is they have to make sure that the brands are willing to stay with him, but his super stardom that he's ascending to right now is just limitless. I mean, the way the guy plays the game is so exciting and then who he is off the court is more exciting. So you have one of those situations that you had, it's different, but the closest thing I can relate it to is in Iverson where you got this guy who's like, yo, I'm out here, I'm gonna live my life with however the fuck I wanna live my life and I'm gonna play the game or whatever the fuck I wanna play the game and we all wanna play the game like him and then some people wanna live the life like him and it's just magical, so many eyeballs. I mean, the kids are just gonna be like, oh my God, this is my hero. Now, I understand why the companies are gonna be like, nah, fuck this, why are you living this life that you don't necessarily live? I guess that was the criticism, like, is he really in these streets or has he adopted this street stuff once he became rich and successful? Both were stupid. Yeah. Whether he's really in the streets or adopted the streets after he's super successful, both were dumb. Yeah. I don't know if kids like this. You know what I'm saying? Because kids recognize stupidity too. No, they don't. And there's a lot of kids. No, they don't. Kids like this. They recognize it and they go, that's awesome. No, when it comes from rappers, not when it comes from somebody who's on a basketball court making hundreds of millions of dollars. Yes, they do. They just like wild boys, man. We loved from AI. Yeah. We loved AI. We didn't see AI doing stuff like this, Alex. We didn't see AI flashing. He literally got a gun charge. When did Alan Iveson get a gun charge? When he was in Virginia. No, he didn't. He got into a fight. What are you talking about? He got into a fight. Yeah, and they get, it was actually, I think they give him a lynching charge. In South Carolina, if you get into a fight with more, with a bunch of people. Oh. And you end up jumping somebody. Gotcha, gotcha, gotcha. It's a lynching charge. Okay, that's still being stupid. Yeah. He was 17 years old. He wasn't even in the NBA yet. What are y'all talking about? Okay, whatever. Like, he wasn't a multimillionaire with a hundred million dollar sneaker deal, a hundred million dollar contract. Why do you think he's getting flamed on social media? They calling them, I saw somebody calling them a, what do they call it, NBA? NBA, NBA dumb boy. Jai Warrant, you know, as in warrant. The kids don't look up to this because they can look at this behavior and tell it's silly and stupid. Yeah, that shit's fire, bro. I just wanna do it. You don't know kids got dressing like one. You think you dress like one, you know them. I wanna do it. You got a sweatsuit on. Get out of here, bro. I want to do hoodrat shit with my friends. No. And he's doing hoodrat shit with his friends. They like hoodrat shit with your friends when all your friends are hoodrats. When you're a hundred million dollar NBA player and could lose everything because of this, no, they don't respect that. And by the way, they'll be the first to clown you because the truth to the matter is misery loves company. They're really jealous of you. They don't want to see you succeed. So they will cheer you on when it comes to fucking throwing your life away. And now that he's in trouble and he's been suspended indefinitely, what's happening? Trending topic online. Look at that meme. Are you just a fucking meme now? Well, people meme everything. They got nicknamed for you, but that's what they do to you. They don't really want to see him in these streets. They'll cheer you on until you jump off a bridge and then they're like, you stupid motherfucker, now you NBA dumb, dumb boy. I think that you're speaking on this as an adult. Yes. And I think that these kids making the memes are just having a lot of fun. And it's more fun to show how into guns and into the street life he is than it is to be like, let's make memes about how bad it is to be street. They're calling him NBA dumb boy. Yeah, it's a pun. It's funny. And it's a reflection of how they feel about him. NBA dumb boy. Derek Rose watching Jamerant waste away a good pair of knees trying to be that funny. Trying to be hood. That's hilarious. Once again, Derek Rose watching Jamerant waste away a good pair of knees trying to be hood. Nobody respects that hood shit, bro. They really don't. Charlotte, the kids are relating to him because he likes all the same music that they like. They do the same shit in the videos with their guns and all this shit. I'm talking about just the kids, the young kids that like the same shit that he, I'm telling you, Charlotte. Okay. Cause I know you worship academics. The kids, go out and do the pages. Are you the kids that say- Get the fuck out of here. Get the fuck out of here, bro. Go out and do the page and see what the kids are saying about him. Why you say it? Why you say it? Why'd you throw agatebics on me? That's crazy, bro. That's crazy. You never heard his feelings. Yeah. He's talking about his outfits, talking about his nails. That shit run right off the set. Worship the agatebics. Damn, bro. Why do you keep- Why do you put that on him? You have dresses, one academic sneakers that he's gonna play. You look like Grant with a chat nigga, bro. I haven't even seen him, but I think that's how he looks. The ghost. Shout out to Grant with it. The ghost. All I'm saying is, go to ag page and see what they're saying about him. Ag had the funniest joke. Ag was like, Y'all gonna be the first person. Y'all the first person to ever try to get out the NBA to make it to the hood. Like, nobody would comment since respect this. And I don't see kids respecting this. But kids don't have comments since. That's a thing. And Alex said that the kids respect the mute. Yes, they like Joc. Cause he listened to the same music, but Joc's their age. Joc's 24 years old. Why do they respect you gonna be in the music? Why do they respect the rappers that do it? And especially the rappers that fake like they live the hood life. Cause we know a lot of rappers that don't do that hood shit. And they still rap about it. Why do they respect that? I don't know what y'all call respect because the reality is- Admire, look up to. Yes. Listen to their music. I think they like their music. I don't think that they're liking. I don't think nobody has a favorite. Oh man, did you see him with the guns in that video? It's the music attached to it. Who said something about that earlier? The Michael, the story, what was the shit? You said something about the story with the guy saying Michael Jackson? Michael Jackson musical? Oh, the song. Do you remember? The song tells the story, not the artist. Exactly. So people like artists that tell stories through their music. And if you're watching like, let's say a documentary about them and this dude's telling you all this gangster street shit he did. And he's in the streets with a bunch of dudes with guns. You'll be like, damn, he really from where he from. But once that person makes millions of dollars, cause you see it all the time, whether it's YSL, job or rent, as soon as they get in trouble for being hood, everybody calling them stupid. Well, here's the thing. Everybody. Here's the thing. Nobody that's in the NBA that's actually hood, acts hood. Could they be happy to be out? Well, no. If they're still active and there have been people in the NBA that have been active. I don't mean active, like they're going to run around a block shooting people, but they're active like with the gangs that they grew up in and they're still maybe supporting some of those things. And so I don't want to speak too much of people's business. But you- Some of it is documented though. Like Jalen Rose has put it out there. All right, fair enough. Jalen Rose said I was that guy, yeah. They're other people. Those people had this crystal clear image cause they knew they were on some dirt and they couldn't bring any attention to the dirt. So they had to be good figures in the community. Oh, I know what you're talking about. Yeah, you do. I know exactly what you're talking about. So don't talk about it. So there's a few, but yeah. I know that. You're talking about the big one. Come on, bro. Yo, you, what is this? I know, like, they're all taller. Right here, this guy right here. My point is- There's gunna main over here, bro. My point is, yeah, God, please. Gunna main, gunna main, gunna main. Gunna main, gunna main, gunna main. Okay. So I think the fact that he is out here living this wildlife, got the gun, et cetera, shows me he's not really about the street life because if you were about the street life, you wouldn't share that shit. You'd be trying to be like the perfect little NBA player who's media trained and all this other stuff so they don't know about the wild stuff you're actually associated with. I'm gonna be honest with you. I don't even think Jai was trying to act thug. What I think Jai was doing was being a rebel without a cause because he's already under investigation for other incidents, right? That's right, but after- Yeah, that's why he did it like this. He didn't point it at the camera like tough guy shit. He's like, man, inna boo boo. That shit is funny, bro. It's almost like he's listening to people who's like, yo, you under investigation for fighting the little kid or whatever, you under investigation for allegedly pointing a gun at a person. I think he was mocking the system that's coming after him. He's mocking all of the analysts like Shannon Sharpe and everybody else to his detriment, of course. But I don't think he was trying to be gangster in that moment. I think he was on the scene, inna boo boo. Very, very stupid decision. Why do gangsters always want to be naked? What's gangster about that? Why gangsters always got their shirts off, just draped over dudes? I know one thing, man, you know, all I know is, man, when you come from the extremes that somebody like John Merant comes from, John Merant comes from Dolls L, South Carolina. The population in Dolls L is like 3,500 people. I'm from Bombs Coast. When I grew up, it was 7,000 plus people and now it's like 10,000. The population of where he's from right now was like 3,500 people. John's from the sticks for real. Probably didn't even have a real basketball goal. Probably had the crate with the ply board behind it type shit, right? I know he probably grew up on dirt roads. You know what I mean? So to see somebody come from those extremes do things like this, it's like, man, please pull the young boy to the side before he blow it off. Because you got the opportunity to change so many people alive. Like, you know, John's only in his fourth year in the league. So he ain't even got the big, big, big deal yet. I thought a lot of the memes were saying like he came, like, had all of, both his parents, private school. Private school, all that kind of stuff. Sure, but that doesn't mean you don't, you still don't come from the dirt. Well, that probably happened to him because of basketball later on once he became, got in high school, you know what I'm saying? Yeah, yeah. The way that it was being positioned, maybe it was Skip Baylor said, no, no, Shayna Sharp said it. It's like, they were trying to do the M&M thing to him. Like, you went to Pembroke. That's a private school. I promise you probably went to Pembroke because of basketball. Well, no, Pembroke is a fake school in a movie called Eight Mile about a battle rapper. Well, you said it like Shayna Sharp said. That's the bar that he says. Clarence has some really nice parents. Well, I'm saying, he probably went to a good- What's going on with you, bro? You want to talk about something? No, I'm saying, he probably still went to a good private school because of basketball. I'm sure that's why he ended up there. If I find out that you believe everything that happened in movies is real, it's going to explain a lot about our friendship. But he went to a private school. It's going to explain a lot about our friendship. I didn't know he went to a private school. That was the memes. Online name made it seem like he comes from a good- You're the funniest guy here, man. Sheldon man just looked at me. He goes, he went to a private school. Listen, I give it up. You literally said this and this needs to be focused on. I said that. He went to a private school. Did y'all say he went to a private school? I don't remember saying it. I don't remember saying it. Somebody rewind the tape. I don't remember saying it. I really don't remember saying it. Like right after. No, I thought I was implying to y'all saying that Shannon Sharp said he went to a private school. And I said if he did go to a private school, it's probably because of basketball. Yeah, that probably, I would think it's probably because of basketball too. Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah. But he's still from the sticks. Okay, so he's from, and the sticks just to clarify. And the sticks don't mean you from the hood either. Yeah, could he be from like a small suburb? That's all I'm saying. And have land. All right, you could just be from the country. So maybe his parents are rich? Nah, they definitely weren't rich. How do you know that? Nah, they weren't rich. They weren't rich growing up. How do you know that? Cause I saw his documentary back at it. He had a documentary on YouTube about Jialek. Maybe three years ago? Three years ago? Yeah, they weren't rich. What's his pop's name is T. T. Marant. Yeah, T. Marant. So yeah, but I just don't want to see this brother blow this shit like this, man. What does that have to do with that thing? I was gonna salute T. I was gonna salute T. You know, pull your young boy to the side. And I wonder about that too. I wonder about the dynamics, right? Like when you come from that and now you work hundreds of millions of dollars, you might be the big homie. You know what I'm saying? Like there might not be anybody to pull you to the side and tell you like, yo, bro, you shouldn't be doing that, including your pops. Yeah. You know? His pops looks incredibly dedicated though. I mean, like he's at every single game. Absolutely. Like he's clearly dedicated to his son's success. That used to play ball if I'm not mistaken. Yeah? Yeah, T used to play ball. Yeah. So my professor really played basketball and gave up, gave it up when his wife got pregnant to become a barber. But still, usually parents that are that dedicated and influential in their kids' lives are going to have influence over the decision that their kids make just out of basic respect. I mean. And that's the other thing too. I do see people saying that like, yo, his dad don't have no control of him. That's not true. You know what I'm saying? Because sometimes you just get to a certain age and you're just not listening to your parents. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? He's the kid is 20, he's 23 years old. Also you might be a parent and you might go, nah, this kid needs tough love and he needs to know his limits and he's going to have to learn it the hard way. And like, you can't be there. You don't want that to happen in this situation though. I mean, we just saw the Chris Rock special. Yeah, but god damn. Chris Rock's daughter ain't made hundreds of millions of dollars yet. And the things Jai's playing with is one thing just to have, you know, you might be drinking or something but you're playing with guns. Like somebody's going to try you, bro. Like you ain't going to just be flashing guns at people. You know what I mean? And you play ball in Memphis. Like you ain't about to out thug nobody in Memphis. Yeah. You know what I'm saying? That's not about to happen. So it's just like the things he's playing with. Like, if you are indeed putting hands on people, if you are indeed pointing guns at people, somebody might feel away one day and feel scared and threatened and retaliate. You know what I mean? So it's just like, bro, don't stop playing with your life, man. More at stake. It's a lot more at stake for Jai Moran. Stop playing with your life. And I know everybody keeps came praying this stuff to like AI and everything. I don't know what AI wasn't into. I know AI was a wild boy, but I also know that the internet wasn't around back then. Yeah. You know what I mean? Yeah. And I wonder how they would have reacted. I mean, AI was just an absolute darling of the people. Like we loved him. I remember being obsessed with him. I thought that he was just the greatest just sports figure that I'd ever seen. Like I wanted to play the game like him. I wanted to be like him. Yeah, there was just like a liberation. What y'all are saying about Jai Moran and the kids loving that is what AI actually was. But once again, AI wasn't doing shit like this. AI had attacks. You know what I'm saying? He had the braids. He dressed like a hip hop person. He hung out with the rappers. He even rapped a little bit. You know what I mean? He wore all the jewelry. That's what people liked. That's exactly why NBA hasn't dressed cold. Alan obviously didn't pay all those fines for this shit. Alan Brooks's channel is in a stone cold Steve Austin. I had to match up for the Lakers. That's funny. That was wild. Oh, man. I don't see stone cold at all. I don't see stone cold at all. That's one of those. Stone cold one of those motherfuckers. You got to do white face for it. You got to go full white face and you got to shave your head. Not even do stone cold. If you're not bald, you're not stone cold. You're not stone cold and you got to wear the boots. You got to have the boots on. Oh yeah, what did he wear? Yeah, I don't know. Some Jays or something. Or some Air Force 1. Yeah, I don't see. You got to shave some bills and then come back with some Ask Nitty. You want to do Blue Chill? Like what? What else we got? Taylor said so much more stuff. Let's see. Scroll down. What else we got? What do city girls do? Young Miami. Oh, Young Miami. Say she's not going to get married. We knew that already though, Young Miami. I mean, what? Why do you say that like that? Um, Young Miami. How? Yeah. What do you mean? She didn't say she wasn't going to get married. That's not what I saw. I mean, to be honest with you, I never, Young Miami, oh, Young Miami announced, let me see. It's been a long week. I just want my man. I'm not sharing my next N-word. Young Miami explains not wanting marriage. No, I don't want to get married. I don't want to get married because I feel like men are not faithful. And if I get married, that means I'm giving my life away to you. So that means like I want to be with you for the rest of my life. All right. So let's clarify here. You do want to get married. You just don't think that there's a man out there that's willing to uphold the values of marriage. I wonder about people, like I love Young Miami, but I wonder if people are intimidated by Young Miami's music. You know what I'm saying? Are they intimidated by her music? Are they intimidated by things they hear her say in interviews, meaning she's a city girl. City girls are outside. What do they say? City girls are, don't seem like they don't want to be tamed. You know what I mean? Like city girls seem like they don't want to be in relationship. City girls want to, you know, pop that pussy for a goon as long as they can. So if you're a guy. Don't be upset. You want a city girl? I don't know. What guy wants a city girl? What guy wants a girl is like, I want to pop my pussy for a goon. She's never said that. The whitest shit I ever heard you say in my motherfucking life. Never said that. Never said that white. Ever in life. You sounded this type of white like he's right there. You rub it off on it. Nah, like we don't want it. We don't want a city girl, man. No. We don't want that. Damn. And also if you're a city girl, you want to attract city dudes. Yeah. Even that tweet I'm not sharing my next n-word. I thought that was the whole point of dating a city girl. She probably over it. Diddy got new babies and all that stuff. She just like, it was cool. She goes through their whole phase, man. They get over that shit real quick. But it's only been a few months she just was saying how she cool with it. Like he can do him. I don't know how much dirt she did in that month. She might have just went through it. But isn't that the same way Diddy goes about his shit? Like he doesn't want to get married anymore. He just wants to have, you know, situations. So she's just doing the same as him. Yeah. But that's a function of money. Yeah. You know, like you don't want to go through that whole shit. I think they all just jaded. Yeah. And by the way, I just, I wonder, man, like is it too much for people? Like I'm telling you, even when, you know, people, when women talk about their sexual exploits a lot or things that they've done. Oh, I don't want nothing to do with that. Like, yo. I'm sorry. I don't want, and no guy does. I love my young Miami. Young Miami says she got peed on. No guy wants to deal with that. Who wants to be with the girl that got pissed on, yo? Who wants to be with all your boys watching her? Y'all started listening to your girl's podcast. Oh, wherever on episode. Oh, the one where she got pissed, dumped on her fucking head. It's only because she talked about it. Say again? I said it's only because she talked about it. You don't want to know that. Nobody wants, yeah. No one wants to know it. She's probably, mad girls have probably done it and just haven't talked about it. Yeah. Don't talk about it. Do all the craziest freak shit. Just don't talk about it. Through all of that, it's people that will still. Be with a million guys. Don't talk about it. Through all of that, it's still people that will marry young Miami, though. Because she's fun. You know what I'm saying? And she's a fun girl from Florida, man. First of all, Florida girls are absolutely a good time. Yeah, there's no question. You know what I'm saying? Listen, and there's guys out there that will be so enthralled with who she is. They'll want a wife or a girl. They're crazy, you know what I'm saying? Yeah, just if I'm, if I'm, if there are women listening right now, do not talk about all the guys you fucking addicts. You're sucking a cum and a piss and don't do it. Don't do it. Don't do it. God. I'm just saying, just don't do it. If you want to have like a lasting relationship, don't do it. Because it's going to be very difficult for a lot. Guys are very sensitive. Our egos are incredibly sensitive. You're not lying. You're not lying. And we're emotionally fragile people. You're not lying. I wish that we were more confident and that more of us could handle you talking about that. But the reality is that most of us can't. And probably the ones that you want to be with, definitely can't. I think sexual exploits are probably fine, but it's like those details. Nah. Like if you say, if you tell me you got a train ran on you, if you tell me you got peed on you. Holy moly. Holy moly. If you got peed on while getting the train run. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Charlemagne. Stop that. No. That is no, no, no. Come on, bro. Charlemagne. No. I'm learning that a lot after the Brittany Renner interview that I did. Oh yeah. All the guys are mad. All the guys are mad. But all the women are in the comments like, I feel her. I'm proud of her. This is dope. I see the turnaround. I'm glad that she's going through this stage of life. But there has been a turnaround. Yeah. She don't like that life she was living? No. She regrets having that intention. She wants love and... Of course she does. She probably regrets putting all that out there because she realizes how hard it is now to actually find someone. Who's in a barrier? And then she also said that, you know, a lot of it wasn't true. She just leaned into it for social media because social media was paying that picture. See what I'm saying? She need God. She need to become a Christian. She needs to be honest with you. But you guys are allowed to be hoes and talk about it. Nowhere not. Now we are. Yes, you are. But why are you all saying that? That's your fault. But we're not allowed to be hoes. You forgive us. By the way, shows we're not allowed to be hoes. We are. No, you're not. You are. You are. It actually encouraged. Like you said earlier, literally like you said earlier, if you don't do this, you're considered gay. No, it's not. I'm going to tell you this between guys and women. When guys talk about our sexual exploits, they talk about them like in general. Like, yeah, I did this. I did that. You ain't on here talking about. I got a hundred bodies. I slept with a hundred women. Have you ever done that? I know some guys. More than a hundred women. I'm not a gay. I'm not a gay guy. What do you mean? I slept with more than a hundred girls, Sharla. Oh, see? You just ruined my point. I never heard you say that. You're trying to say I'm gay. You're disgusting. You can't sleep with less than a hundred girls. You might as well suck guys. You know how much a hundred people is? Sharla. I have not slept with a hundred women. Really? Hell no. Well, you've been with the same because that's cheating. A hundred women is crazy. I haven't been with the same girls since I'm 18. That's disgusting. I slept with more than 500 women. There's no way just a hundred. It's impossible. That's amazing. Only 365 days in a year, bro. Sharla. You slept with 500 women. No, but Sharla, trust me, do the math. Maybe not 500, but you could definitely do it. I have not slept with close to 100 women. I have not. Y'all don't realize how much a hundred is, bro. I slept with over 500. A hundred is a crazy number. A hundred is a lot. I slept with over 500 four years ago, before I met my wife. I don't believe it. Think about that. I don't believe it. 500 women shows. Do I look like a gay guy to you, bro? Come on. Nothing. Gay is straight. Ain't nobody. Gay is straight. Gay is straight. Ain't nobody getting that kind of action, bro. 500? That? I'm not even joking when I say this. I don't think... I don't think... Girl, we want that. Why? Girl, we want that. I don't even switch it. I don't think Drake or Trace Song just slept with 500 women. No, I think Trace Song did it. Come on, yo. I think Trace Song absolutely did it. I don't know what 500 is. You're going to stop calling these dudes gay? Trace Song's going to do 500 in a month, if you could. It's impossible. Charlotte, are you crazy? 500 women in a month? It's impossible. I don't care. I don't care. In a month. When are you going to get a month? That was ridiculous. You can't do it in a year. We said life. No, we're talking about life. No, I said a month. I said a month. 16? Okay. Hold on. Let's do 16. You start having sex? Yes. Let's do 20. 20 to 30. That's 10 years. Okay? 500 divided by 10 is what? 50. That's 50 girls a year. Do you know how much that is? Nothing, bro. That's four. That's four a month. If you're a rapper. Four a month? You can't have sex with four girls a month? You guys holding up a sign saying, we'll chamber and fuck 20,000 women. Yeah, but that's cap, bro. That's all fucking cap. That's cap. But that's not 500. 20. I don't see it. Charlotte, I don't see it. Especially Trace Song. You can't have sex with four girls a month. Trace Song can do it. Every single show, every single show, he can bring at least two home. This is what y'all are factoring in. Y'all are factoring in. He's fucking a different woman. That's what I said. Every night at every show. Every show there's different people there. Y'all believe that. Four a month. Y'all believe that. It's crazy that y'all believe that. It's crazy that y'all think that these men don't have more discipline and that their teams aren't pushing that away. Like, y'all, these guys got a lot more discipline than you think. If they was out here fucking different women every night, there'd be a lot more bullshit they would be into. Trace Song's gonna be in bullshit? Exactly. What you talking about? Bullshit. Yes. I still... Y'all don't think y'all realize how much 500 is, y'all? Charlotte. 500. I haven't slept with 500 women. I know you haven't. I'm not. I'm not. I'm not. 500 really isn't that crazy. Crazy. It's really not that crazy. 100 is... I'm 45. I ain't doing no 100 women. I tell you that right now. You've been with the same girl since you're 17. That is true. So you're supposed to be with one. That is true. So anything after that is bad. That is true. No, you're right. Right? So you shouldn't be with 100. 100 is insane. Yeah, because that's 100 cheats. That's bad. So we don't want to know your number, okay? No, you can have 100 cheats with a different girl. With one girl. No. No, we count that as one cheat. They don't go by times. Yeah. It goes by person. Yeah. I guarantee you... If you and your wife are having a conversation and you cheat and you be like, we have sex one time. Yeah, that's better. Way better. 100 is a full bonus. I'll be honest. Having sex multiple times with the same girl is probably worse than having sex one time with a bunch of different girls. Absolutely. Absolutely. I just said that. I just said that. You missed the second sentence, though. No. I did not miss the second sentence. I exactly said the same thing. What did you say? What did you say? You said that the number... I said the same thing, y'all. The number. No, the same shit that y'all just said. I just said the same goddamn shit. No, you did it. All I know is 100 is a lot. You said the number of times versus a body. Yes. When that sets you more... 100. If you're right, that's a guy cheated with 10 girls a year. It's two different things, though. That's less than one a month. What do you mean? 10 girls a year. That's less than one a month. If you go to minimum group public for one week and that's 17... 10 girls a year take you 10 years. You fuck her twice. That's your girlfriend. Now, you just get multiple bodies. If you just got a bunch of multiple bodies, you just have a compulsive problem. Y'all got to go back to old Charlotte. That was my rule. What? She had sex with a girl more than three times. That's a relationship. It is. And that's the problem? I always said that. That's a... Now, you hit her from a woman. I was saying this 15 years ago. But that's not true. It is absolutely true. What? You even did your finger like it. You might not think of it in your head, but in her head it is. Just think about it. No, if you have sex with a girl multiple times, that's not your girlfriend. Yes. A situation. Why? It's a situation, but it's not your girl. Multiple times means you're dealing with that person. It's genius. What? We was waiting on the genius commentary. Taylor, get on the bike, please. Taylor, can you get on the mic? Hold on. Did somebody run through it multiple times but they didn't wife you up? Holy shit. I'm going to talk about myself, but calm yourself down. I was saying... You're saying three times you're in a relationship, right? So... Not true. No, no, no, I was saying just within a month, that's what I'm saying, because you could have sex over time. No, no, no, time limit no guy should do it. Exactly. If you're my man and you're having sex with somebody else multiple times, you're wrong. It don't matter what time. Oh, wait a minute. That's crazy. Some of these girls need dick. I was just saying, like if you miss that... Some of these girls need dick. No, I was saying if you're in a relationship with somebody... Stop the need dick too. What? They're girls that just need dick. They just need it. That's true. That's facts. Yeah, why do you need it? And those girls are willing to settle for great dick, but nothing else. Because they have stressful lives, Charlemagne. Okay, but they can go find a single man to give them that. Wait, what? I don't know what you're talking about. But you said once you have sex with those girls more than one time, you're in a relationship. Yeah. He was talking about... You're letting him confuse you. No, I'm not. I'm not trying to confuse you. I'm asking questions. You're saying that him cheating is bad because he's been with somebody for a long time. So I'm talking about people who are with somebody that have sex outside of their relationship. That's fucked up. I'm not talking about just single people dating. Cheating is wrong. But even with single people dating, you start fucking somebody more than once. It becomes a thing. Yes. It becomes a situation. Yo, you can't... If you explain to your girl I slept with her one time. That was it. I apologize, whatever, whatever. She gonna still be pissed off. She might forgive you. She may not. But if you tell her you slept with this one girl a hundred times... You had an affair. Boy! You had a full-blown affair. You had to stay over there. Nobody's discussing that. Nobody's disagreeing with that. Because one of y'all said... You said it. I never said that. You definitely said that. I didn't say it. Alright, alright. Michael B. Jordan heard you. Let's pay some bills. Shout out to the goat. No, there ain't no goat now. God damn it. The goat. There ain't no goat shit. Michael B. Jordan, the goat. Last lap. We pulling up. You want to do bluetooth? Yo, you pulling up. To bluetooth. Yo, guys. Listen. Stop. Listen, if you try to have sex with more than one woman in your life... Okay? If you want to do that... You got to make sure... You got to make sure you're a stiff dick. A stiff dick is one of the most important things when it comes to having sex. Because you can't have sex without it. You can't try to mash your little soft noodle dick into a vagina with your fingers. That's not sex. You need stiff dick. And stiff dick is going to be brought to you by bluetooth. Blow your back out. Potion. Okay? You're going to... Can I start this over? Keep going. That's crazy. Keep going. Keep going. This guy has to hear boys' dad's back up. Whoa. Ready? Alright, guys. We're going to take a break for a second. Listen, let me tell y'all something, man. The bluetooth is really what you need right now. You know, we've been having a lot of sex talk during this podcast. A lot of dick talk, if you will. Shout out to dick talk. And listen, there's one way to deliver the best dick you've ever delivered in your life. And that's with bluetooth. Same active ingredients as inside Cialis or Viagra. But this is the chewed. It's the one we're rocking with. The one that we're making sure that our women are happy, satisfied, indulged, lustful with the chew. Okay? The stiffest dangling you've ever had in your life. Grab it. Throbbed up. Let them grab it. You know what I'm saying? Splitter splatter. That's bluetooth.com. You're going to get your first month free. All you got to do is pay $5 shipping. Okay, bluetooth.com. Make sure you use the promo code idiots with an S on the end, Chris. Idiots. Just pay $5 for shipping. Best dick of your life. Deliver it right to your door. Enjoy it. Let us know how it goes. Now let's get back to the show. Yeah, man. Let's get back to the show. Sleuth and Marlon Wayans too, man. Marlon Wayans. He mentioned me in his new stand-up special as well on HBO. What happened with that? He called me. It was entertaining because he called back to some tweets. He leveled at me back in 2009. I forgot who he was talking about, but he was described. Oh, he's talking about Chris Rock. And he was saying how when he first knew Chris Rock, you know, he was saying, like, Chris Rock was a bunch of different shades of black. He was like, he was like, he's three different colors black. And, you know, he looked like a bruised eggplant. And then he was like, he looked like Charlemagne the God three years ago. So it's actually about eight, nine years ago. But when me and Marlon got into a Twitter beef back in 2009, he threw all those at me. He said, I look like a bruised eggplant. He said, I was three different colors black. I need to choose one. And Marlon said, the one tweet that has ever hurt me in my life. Whoa. And the one tweet that ever hurt me in my life was when he told me that I had peaked at life because Marlon said, because at the time it's context, right? I'm back at home living with my mom. And I've been fired from radio for the fourth time. My wife, my now wife is back living at home with her parents. We got a two-year-old daughter. And when you see that, when you see, because he was clowning me about being fired, that was part of the ammo. And then he goes, you peaked at life, nigga. I looked around like, have I? No. No. Have I really peaked at life? But unlike a lot of people, I use that as motivation. That shouldn't bother me at all. It's like, oh, I'm going to show him what peaking at life looks like. You know what I mean? And so I just got on my shit. Well, it's not like I wasn't going to be on my shit anyway. But it's nice to have a little fuel for the fire. You got to have a little fuel for the fire, man. So he came on breakfast club, and then did you guys suss it out? You talk about it? Well, Marlon always comes on breakfast club. We've actually had that conversation before, but it's just the stand-up gaming new context. You know what I'm saying? Because he mentioned all of those old, and I like that. The fact that, damn, oh, nine, he said these things and now they're back in the stand-up special all of these years. Wow. So salute to Marlon. I heard God loves me. It's really, really good. I saw some of it. I didn't get to finish the whole thing. Ballsy moved to drop it right before Chris, too. Yeah. Because a lot of it is about the slap. I saw a lot of that. I saw a lot of the stuff he was saying about Chris Rock, and Will, and Jada, and everything else. A lot of it is about the actual slap, so. What about the rumors that Tyler Perry is going to buy? BET. BET. I think that would be fantastic. Is that true? Yeah. It's true. It's true. It's a rumor, but it's true. I heard Byron Allen today. I don't know how true the Byron Allen part of it is, but the Tyler Perry aspect of it is definitely true. And it would make sense. I mean, Tyler already owns, I think, 25% of BET+, their streaming service. He's got a lot of content on BET, BET and BET+. And I just think it would be dope. It would be dope for BET to be in Black Hands. And why not Tyler Perry? Love it. You know what I mean? Tyler's that guy, man. Love it. You know? I don't know why people were upset about what Donald Glover said at the Writers Guild Awards. I was at the Writers Guild Awards because Hell of a Week was nominated for Best Variety Talk Show Series. We didn't win. We lost last week tonight by John Oliver. Good company. Yeah. It was a dope event to go to, you know what I'm saying? Just to have the whole team there. Not really my type of room. You know what I mean? But... Why? I like creating. I don't need the Hollywood to do shit. Yeah. You know what I mean? I like creating. I even enjoyed being nominated, you know what I mean? But I don't like the Hollywood vibe. Like Spielberg was in there. It was cool seeing Spielberg. Spike Lee got honored as he should. They only showed one of Spike Lee's movies in his montage, which I thought was very strange. All they showed was he got game. Different scenes from he got game. I don't know why. That was strange as fuck. And Donald Glover presented Paul Sims, who's like a big showrunner in the business with an honorary award. And he made a joke about... I guess they said it was about Chevy Chase using the N-word. I didn't get that from what he said. I got him trying to allude to it. But it was just weird, you know? And everybody's making it a thing. Like, oh, Chevy Chase... Donald Glover says Chevy Chase called him the N-word on the set of Community. I didn't see that, but... Can you scroll down a little, Taylor? There's audio to it. I don't think he was trying to get the audio. I think you got caught looking at Donald Glover's lips. Chevy Chase once called Herb one of the funniest writers working in television. Chevy Chase once called me... You know what? This is about Paul. It was long. It was long. It was a very long between him and then him actually coming up and speaking. All right, let's do some Ask an Idiot, all right? Nino Blue says, What is something you are actively trying to improve on every day? Nyla? Um... You're just so perfect. No, no, no. But I don't know. I guess just balance, I would say. Like, trying to eat health. There's a lot I'm trying to accomplish. Have you ever tried balancing on one leg like that with like both hands in the air? I used to do that shit all the time, yo. That was my move when Karate Kid came out, yo. I don't even know if I can still do that shit. You want to try it? I doubt it. Come on, let's try it. Oh, God. Man. Your pants too tight, Shar. Okay. That's easy. It's all harder back in the day. No, but now you got to do the switch kick. Yeah, don't do that over here. It was the switch. Yeah, the switch is what scared my fuck. No, you got to kick. What the fuck are you doing? All right, okay. Let me see Karate Kid. I just, this is too much. Yo, I'm not going to lie, Sharla. You might fuck Michael B. Jordan up. That right there, yo. That right there was a problem, yo. I'm not going to lie. Dude. He just switched it to more time needs and shit right now. That was crazy. Yo, you're a good Karate fighter, man. Yo, Sharla man. Everybody was kung fu fighting. You didn't have to do their accident. That was not the accident I was singing a song. A white guy sung that song though. For real? Yeah. You know what that song is about? Kung fu fighting. Masturbation. Really? Everybody was kung fu hot. What? It is. That's a real thing. That is a, that is a real thing. That's serious. The corner says update, Sharla, update on the next book, Dammit the Streets Hungry, working on it. Third book is on the way. What is the third book going to be about? Yeah, I tell y'all. Closer to the time. It's time. But nah, it's, it's, it's, yeah, working on it. This year? What stories are you going to tell? Won't be next year. It'll be, it'll be soon. But it won't be, it won't be this year. We got a couple other releases coming out from Black Privilege publishing this year, man. We got two releases coming out in the fall. I cannot wait to announce the first one that'll be out. But yeah, we got a couple releases coming out this year. Go get a state of emergency by Tamika Mallory, how to win in the country we built, and go get Shallow Waters by Anita Kopeck. Those are the first two releases from Black Privilege publishing. And I got two, we got two coming out this year, two, two books that I'm excited about, man. So I'll be making those announcements real soon. Oh, this is a good one. Yasme up says, if you were gay, who would be your ideal celebrity partner? Come on, bro. What? Come on, bro. What? Don't do that. Do what? Don't do that. Do what? Don't do that, man. You afraid to announce? Don't do that, bro. While you might run into him? Don't do that. Don't do that. Don't want them to know you bricked up? Don't do that, bro. What you mean? Don't do that. What you mean? Don't do that. Nyla, you just trying to instigate. Nyla, my ass. Envy or Schultz. I said, Nyla, if you were gay, who would be your ideal? What the fuck is wrong with you? Yo, this girl's crazy. I know her fucking mom. This girl's crazy. Oh, okay. What's going on right there? What the fuck is wrong with you, yo? If I was gay, who would be my ideal celebrity partner? Do they need to be gay, or can I flip them to gay, too? Wait, huh? Who would be yours, Nyla? Oh, they as in the person? Yeah. What do you think I was talking about? I don't have one. You don't have one? No. There's no girl that you could les up and then you'd want to be with? No. If you were les. If you were a big old... Come on. If you were a big les. Yeah. No rap city. I'm okay. There's not a single girl that if you were a carpet munch, you would go afterwards. Not a carpet munch. You would go after. Not a single one. Cat. Big cat. Okay. We know you do. Of course, Taylor. You're already 49% gay as is. Yeah. So you're just waiting to get tipped over. You're gay? Yo, get over there. Why am I gay? Because you said a girl eats you up. That's not gay. That's definitely gay. That's the pit. That is actually what gay is. Like you said earlier, just give it a head. Like, I'm just playing back. I'm trying to be at peace. You're gay. I'm trying to be at peace. So if I was just playing back and a guy gave me a head, would I be gay? Definitely. Okay. But that's different. It's not different. You double-stand it, have an ass. You mean... That ain't that gay if a guy gives you a head. Why? You gotta stop. Because people really believe it. Wait, wait, wait. Everybody was coming for a fight. Yo, I'm trying to make your argument. Come on. Well, I would say Megan Thee Stallion. You would be gay for Megan Thee Stallion? Yes. Do you see how she twerks? Oh, you like a twerk. To stop, she's been through enough. That's the last thing she needs. What's the last thing she needs? You. Um, let's go. What else? Girl, why is she saying that? I don't know. Why are you... Why is she coming? Why are you coming for her? And how are you going to ask a question and not answer? Yeah. Who would you be gay for, bro? Nobody. Come on, y'all. That's cat. That's cat. Not celebrity. Come on, bro. Not celebrity. Not celebrity. That's way worse. I know. Not celebrity. What about... That means you really like somebody on the low side. That's the guy who drives Uber. Yeah, right? Which you're just really into. First of all, why would you disrespect me like that? What you mean? If I'm going to ever be gay. Okay. And give up these cheeks? Wow, you're a bottom too. For your bottom. It's going to be for somebody with some trillions. Oh, not a celebrity. I don't want to fuck a celebrity. Okay, so who? I don't know. So is Sally Prince going to shit on a table in Dubai for you? Is that what you want? Nah, I don't want no Saudi. Why not? Um... Come on, bro. Why not? Your brain is a crazy thing, y'all. You don't have to say shit. I said some shit in my mind. And that shit was enough for me. I don't care if the pot is... But my body is exploding. Oh, nah, but it wouldn't be for no celebrity. They ain't got enough money for these cheeks. Oh. So who... Who said I'm going to be a bottom? What? Who said I'm going to be a bottom? You said you're giving up the cheeks. You still... Bro, when I'm even giving up the cheeks, I mean I'm going to let somebody crack them. I'm just saying they're still going to see the cheeks. You know what I'm saying? This guy. That's giving it up, bro. Come on, man. You ain't never... Sit here and tell me. The prince hit that stage with his ass out. People wasn't like, yo, he giving it up. That's what they mean, man. The mental gymnastics to spin out with some just now. You don't think so? So you're just going to walk around naked but not let nobody crack? That's enough for some of these rich old motherfuckers. Wait, so that's what you're going to... What are you talking about? That's more than enough. How do you know? You speaking for... People that type of shit just get naked. They play video games with me or some shit. So that's what you would do. You would just play video games with some really rich guy. Depends on all that in life. Jeff Bezos? Depends on all that in life. Depends on what you're at in life, right? Well, tell me, where are you at? You can't ever say you wouldn't do something until, you know, what if you done hit rock bottom and your kids are starving and you know what I mean? Like, evil. She's solid. She's crazy solid. You wouldn't play video games... Hold on, I'm going to talk about it. Yeah, yeah, yeah. Dead. Dead to the world. Like... Crazy. And this guy's like... He's crazy. This guy's like... Absolutely insane, bro. Fucking you. 10 million dollars to play video games butt-necking with me. Nothing else. Yeah. You wouldn't do it? I'd be honest. I'd do it if it was for the Last of Us 3. If they put out the new Last of Us. If he just had access to the new Last of Us. You wouldn't even... You achieved 10 million, bro. You achieved... He's going to play the video games. That's it. We're going to butt-necking play video games. That's it. And then I can leave right after. That's right. That's all. And you've got to reset the game. You've got to reset the game every now and then. It's a lesbian. So you've got to reset the games. That means you've got to get up. Get up. So they're going to see. They're going to see. It's an abdu-du hole. They're going to see. Make sure there's no toilet paper remnants. You've got to make sure. I know you got to wipe. 10 million dollars. That's a lot of money. I already told you. If he said Last of Us. I'm going to be like, oh, where are you going? Last of Us. Let me get this straight. So they got the third part of Last of Us. Okay, cool. You want to start? That's a lot of money. I've been waiting for this game for so long, man. Last of Us Part 2 is so exciting. Just go on. Just go on. Bro, by the way. This is a hypothetical scenario. This motherfucker really wants Last of Us, yo. You want my watch off? Or should I keep my watch on? What is best for you? He really wants Last of Us 3. Your man over there getting private footage for a little later, bro. He going to become two-fighting. I'm getting the fuck out of here, man. If you listen to this podcast, you think we're smart, you think we're intelligent, you think we're brilliant, you're absolutely right. But if you listen to this podcast, and you think we're just a couple of idiots who don't know shit, you're right, too. It's the Brilliant Idiots podcast. Thank you for listening.