 Alrighty, let's play this through once here. There's sound So as I was emailing you I like the idea of someone screen testing and Because of that you have the license to overact because he's just a bad actor The the what I was saying here that I wasn't a massive fan of the sound like generally I'm a fan of using sound effects because it's kind of it's not done enough usually just lip-sync with with Someone saying a line. So I do like that. I would probably just take this out I'm thinking if you have this in there, I'm gonna wait for something very Tarantino-esque Not there has to be any violence in there But something with very specific dialogue and and interesting, you know, it's big gestures and hand movements and something like that I don't there's something that comes with that name. I would just take that out and I would just probably do Where is this here somewhere where you can change in your in your clapper here like screen test or something Now because you have green screen. There's something where I thought, hmm What we could probably do something more also in terms of contrast and performance So I'm not sure if my drawings are gonna be clear, but this is kind of what I meant when I was emailing you So what if you take the sound out and this could be This I know I was saying like since there's room here You could have kind of a robot in there and I'm thinking very old school This is weird head and it could be springs, you know, something with springs And you got all buttons there and maybe there's some wheels and you're like very very bad animatronic type of thing and to me it's more like he is kind of a Kind of like a space man because got his ray gun and it's kind of his his overacted Oh, there is there is this villain next to me and I need to shoot it or there's just some line You can you can make this where it's it's an action thing or maybe it's there They're almost friends like that's his his bodyguards type of robot and he's there and they're kind of looking You can have his hand on him. They're doing something together So I mean, I don't want to dictate the acting choices, but something where it's an overacted almost sci-fi-esque Type of thing he says his line Maybe he's looking over here and then he waits because he realizes wait. Why is the robot not? Doing his thing so again robot will be here and then turns around and Then he breaks character. So meaning that he is overacting. He is in this environment. It's very cheesy old school You know sci-fi type of thing with where they're gonna comp in some cheesy backgrounds paper backgrounds and stuff But what I'm basically what I'm saying about my rambling note here is that I'm thinking of he is in one acting mode Which is over the top old school with his ray gun Oh, we got to do something and then he realizes why is the robot not doing something and robot could just have very Slight movements and some blinking lights then he breaks character goes. Oh, what's going on again? Turns around has this angry look and then maybe you know knocks knocks on to the the hull of the robot it's been this very Very frustrated like ah, why are you not working me a little bit of a punch It could be a little bit of a kick with his foot and then because This is what I was saying because of like those springs with his weird head again Make it like super super Again this could be wheels so that he just kind of turns in why like a y-rotation just kind of moves around So it's very cheap looking and after his kick with the leg or or punch or whatever he does with his arms or legs There could be You know, there could be a panel or something in there that that opens up and and the and the thing breaks So imagine I'm gonna change this again with my horrible drawings, but imagine and suddenly malfunctions and the wheels buckle and It falls to the ground because of that you have a nice drag on the head and that goes door the arms go dooring and Stuff breaks and you know panels open with burning more springs and stuff coming out and their bigger piece that comes out Damn that hits him on the head Don't turn the sound off and then you still have this Where he gets hit But it's not slapsticky it's more him and you can have a funny Fainting type of thing where it falls this way or he turns around a 180 or something and still falls this way That's the end of the shot And the reason I'm saying this because I would this seems all one note Like there's a clap and then he yells he yells shooting And fall apart from maybe this moment here It's just there's constant sound and energy and to me there's not that much contrast and he doesn't do much besides Going into different poses and then falling so it's almost more of a Pose body mechanic shop, and I'm again. You can absolutely ignore everything I said my thought is just how can we make this? Where there's more thought process in the character While retaining your idea and not scrapping everything so the overacting aspect would still be there with him You know however he is in his in his thing where he has his ray gun or whatever And he does this cheesy looking around me. You could even have some cheesy Rocks and props here in the back and they're just going to fill in you know Like a planet whatever in blue screen or green screen as you will imagine this But he does his overacting Then stops and has a complete change of acting where first he was acting now It's real and I just annoyed that his cheap prop partner is malfunctioning So that thought process like a gear change type of thing would be already more interesting to me Then you can have a 180 turn so interesting mechanics And how does he turn is it a slow turn because this is the hundredth time this has happened And he is just so frustrated that it's the slow simmering rage build-up turn where he looks and the face gets And then he finally kicks him where it's almost like this bringing up the reel of Gherm's demo reel here with where you look at I'm gonna leave the sound on but look at the The chef's build of an explosion So that type of thing of where he goes And then explodes and even the head turns Red different moment or am I imagining this I am imagining this maybe Maybe maybe not anyway that explosion there So that's what I'm imagining where he has his overacting change race just disappointed thought process Gear change turns around with his build-up and then finally either it's a punch or a kick and Then because things fall apart again emphasizing how cheap this is things hit him and then you still have a fall Right, so it's still a fall that you can do so I'm not you know eliminating everything that you did So that is my thought process that could be fun to do you have more range You can absolutely overact and do some horrible acting on purpose And then you can show the switch where it's more natural and an actual real Performance and then back into I can also show body mechanics and physics of hierarchy falls and when he falls I wouldn't do this Land where besides the kind of a really twin pose there Funny how both are so so Rotate it up there, but this feels like it's peeling onto the surface like Where I will make this more Like a bit of a bit more of a bouncing and some more complexities in that in that drop But that's it that is my thought and you can even potentially keep this you can just make this white Make this white with a cool red belt and maybe red boots and you can just have I don't know Something you can a red patches me like you can you can still have a cool outfit Maybe like a red shirt underneath so have this very bold colors cheesy outfit I mean you could almost add a bit of a hat with a little bit of a Spring and the thing so there's a spring and there's a spring here mimics this but then you have a lot of interesting Right, you know secondary action stuff there on on some overlapping and bouncy Spring Prop accessory type of thing. Anyway, that's me rambling. That's my thought on this shot and Then you have this one. So again, let's play this which I thought was really cool Cuz every now and then I thought the timing could be tweaked a bit and then the end pose So if you come in here, dude, dude, it's almost like Since you are so stylized I wish you would hold This moment I be careful with your spacing to your you're starting to ease in a bit But then you got this this pop forward and then this freeze here and then that I would watch out watch out for the spacing It's a bit more he you know Explodes up has more of a hold and then out but speaking of hold I would probably have a moment through there where I would hold something like this maybe for a frame or two more I know this is picky, but just a frame or two, but since he comes in It could have been what took to a bit of a snappy to hold out their timing And I will probably come out With more broader poses and hold them a bit longer and then snap into this Only because we are stuck in this not so great silhouette here where there's an overlap and there are also connections there Where I could try to put this a bit more Silhouetted even this you could probably push this arm forward a bit more. I know it's like trying some pushed Silhouettes there even through here to get a bit more negative space in this guy That being said right after this There's something Yeah, we're feeling like a little bit more of a hold there just a little bit and then the jump is too fast So he comes into this it's a bit tricky because That's all cool. I wish there was something where He stops and then here we have You can almost have one leg here and then somehow Find another leg room for the leg back there, and I'm cheating a bit with my drawing and then We're getting ready with arms and not having arms either arms back there on This I don't feel like we can get a bit of a stronger silhouette there But then the thing is that this seems too fast Yeah, I feel like you want to go just add a couple more frames to this there's something that feels too Too poppy also watch out Probably as you swing so quickly forward You can look at the body here here here Bam, and then it just locks even if you lock it. I would have a bit of overshoot on the head Because it seems more like a hiccup because you're stopping but then you're continuing here And then I would I would give this one more frame of a full extension on the leg here And then extend this leg out for cleaner silhouette You only have one frame of full extension every back to being bent I think that's where it would help you to give this a frame or two For all of this again as I watch this It just seems there's something fast, and it's almost I Don't know how you can do this. I don't want to destroy your shop But it's almost as if you want this here So it's not just bam, but it's Something like this Where there's a feeling of of whole So you have a bit of a that's the feeling right? Right now it's just something I know this I know it doesn't make sense but the feel is that it's so straight and with a sudden turn and given that you have all those Nice lines, and we're looking at you know lots of Curvature in your posing. I'm feeling that there's something we can do in the In the path as well to reflect that right now it feels like that's okay And then it's very straight and then back into Into you know nicer curvature flow and pass so Yeah, there's something where this just feels too fast and by adding two frames. I'm curious if you add more frames I'd say two frames to all of this Where you just change your your spacing a bit and this could be potentially maybe not going as far here And maybe I'm not sure if you add more poses how this will look like where it's just it's just a slow straight line And that's why I'm imagining you might have to move it over to give this more room to add more time But then to add to that curvature. I mean he is He's doing this right so then you have That type of feel and then here what I would do is you Do this in a in a tight curve here, right? That's all cool And then he goes out and there's something where to me you almost want like to me at least I would stretch this and almost wait a bit and Then get into the bent legs And I know if you need to add one more frame or you can You can break this up a bit because then you have a stretch here And the reason why I'm saying this because when I watch this in real time What I'm seeing here is That's around the shape that he's in and when he goes back down. It's again kind of the same the same shapes Size and I'm looking at what if you go? Jump into this where this is fast and the shape is small So there's there's less friction in the air and there's faster travel Possibilities there, but then he holds a bit here And then he wants to go row with that big swing up and there's something to me visually where I feel like we could stretch this more again because of the sudden speed up and then You can go up there. I know that you're squashing for a For a stretch here, but to me this feels like this would work if there is maybe a flatter wall And then he's pushing himself off if that makes sense versus Versus a swing if you would do this then to me it would be a swing like this where he he contract and squashes to then Stretch out to get somewhere But again, this feels just like a swing up that goes directly to that new target And that's why I feel like we could do through there even we can start elongating and then you can always get smaller Into this Again, I think that pauses good there Even through here, I feel like we can Here there's something where we're coming off of here I feel like we want to do one more pose Where this is your origin and the point the foot still points at origin you can still have that other leg here and Then you get into this higher thing and that's still just like here on this jump I feel like we can exaggerate and hold this here ease into this section a bit more to then snap down into this and What could we do here? I think once you get to here. I feel like this is always the same Pose and no arms are changing a little bit especially through here other than that the upper body feels a bit similar there Yeah, it was a bit fast I Feel like you want to do Lands like this I mean you might explore Not that you want to go into spider Spider-man territory since it's not a spider-man shock, but where he could do this With that hold here and change posture and then do a reverse C curve there where then he gets into You know where something is suddenly a bit more like that so that he would land Foot first to or leg first in my horrible drawing, right? So it's kind of the legs are cushioning that impact the boom and then that's so that's first And then the body comes down into this pose I'm only saying this just because that might force a character to change direction here Which give this more of a silhouette change because I'm kind of reacting to this so that being the same for so long Then the other thing the last thing is that after all of this right all of this energy of You Then it's okay So, I don't know if that's planned if you want that casual contrast Of all this action suddenly, huh? But I don't know for some reason I was expecting after this to do kind of a push-off Where he arms are stretched out Shoulders down head looking up, you know pushed off and it's just any lands there With a bit of a one to bounce Action and then he he is you know, I know there's something where He's more standing there like like a superhero But this is this seems to me it just comes out of nowhere. This is weird I wouldn't say emotional change out there This is a crazy emotional shot But there's something where the feeling and energy is all my action and then it's all like all right I don't know how you do it type of thing So personally I would tweak it like that Like I said where it's kind of a Jump up and a pound like a nice nice energetic athletic bounce and then he has a cool pose at the end that's more kind of a you know, like puffy chest out stretched out leg Where it's just more of a hero pose and arms back and not that my pose is great, but that that's kind of the Feeling that I have for the end of the shot, which of course you can totally disagree. It's your shot But these are just my thoughts. All right. Thank you All right, there's an email you can sign up you can start whenever you want you can submit whatever you want You get 16 submissions either way like and subscribe would be awesome. All right. Thank you