This is the Senior citizen version of "Are you lonesome tonight"
Sung by me in the style of Elvis
Are you lonesome tonight?
Does your tummy feel tight?
Did you bring your Mylanta and Tums?
Does your memory stray, to that bright sunny day, when you had all your teeth and your gums?
Is your hairline receding, your eyes growing dim? Histerectomy for her and it's prostate for him.
Does your back give you pain?
Do your knees predict rain?
Tell me Dear, are you lonesome tonight?
Is your blood pressure up?
Good cholesterol down?
Are you eating your lowfat cuisine?
All that oat bran & fruit, Metamucil to boot, helps you run like a well oiled machine.
If it's football or baseball,
He sure knows the score.
Yes he knows where it's at, but forgets what it's for.
So your gallbladder's gone, but your gout lingers on.
Tell me dear, are you lonesome tonight?
When your hungry, he's not.
When your cold, he is hot.
Then you start that old thermostat war.
When you turn out the light.
He goes left, you go right.
Then you hear his great symphonic snore.
He was once so romantic, so witty and smart. How did he turn out to be, such a cranky old fart?
So don't take any bets, it's as good as it gets.
Tell me dear are you lonesome tonight?
Thank you, thank you very much.