 Yo, welcome to Doit Flop. We're here in Liverpool. It's one of the main events of the day. Shout out to Kazmir for having us back. It's always Doit Flop all fucking day. You know the score. If you are here ready for the main event, please make some noise. It's coming. I'ma put up with his shit until April 25th. After then, we're done. Fuck that shit. Now, we'll wrap. Doitflop.com slash tickets. Lunacy versus OJ, the main event of all main events coming up. Six weeks time as of today in Ministry of Saudi London. You wanna come? Doitflop.com slash tickets. All right. Anyway, we're here at one of the main events, MC on my right-hand side. Main event of number one. Please make some noise for the calcium kit. Let's go. Everyone, everyone, everywhere. MC on my left-hand side. Battle is six weeks today, but right now for the Liverpool fans. Please make some noise for OJ. Let's go. For the cup. We chose on camera that Osh is gonna go first. It's round number one on Osh. If everyone can hold it down, please. Thank you. It's on Osh. What's Osh? Bars, right? Bars. Calcium kid. Your nan is a flid. Bishby doggy pattern when she having a swim. All jokes, fuck bars. I ain't rappin' for shit. If I have an accident on the way home, crashing a whip. If you have an accident on the way home, you're gonna have to abandon a ship. I hate you woolly backpicks. I'm Osh, heavy hitter. Got shit lot like Reggie Blinken. I'm a blue nose. We're both funny, but I'm Richard Richard and you're Eddie Hitler. What sandwiches do you do? Eat some bacon head with everyday episode of Jerry Springer. And from Liverpool where we've said, aye, more ties than Henry Winkley. Yeah. Osh, I sell stripes to Gremlins, like stripes from Gremlins. I snort stripes myself to cause fights with Gremlins. Man, this battle's one-way traffic. All Osh, A.G., fuck you. Pre-prize and fuck Paul O'Grady. You look like a motherfucking Polo, baby. Fuck you. Pre-prize and fuck Paul O'Grady. Man, you're so slim, but you're no shady. Fuck you, aye, aye, lad, do you get the idea? See, these bacon head, man, will talk a tough game, but the difference is, we live it. And I know you're not scouts, but whoever you're on is not from Liverpool. You are, so deal with it. This is him, this is him. You're man, you're man, man. I'm a free spirit, man. I'm a free spirit. I drink food and I eat Guinness. I'm such a... I'm such a free spirit. I actually turned up to the battle today with free spirits. But, yeah, no, lad, fuck your weak, cheap lyrics and your cheesy gimmicks. I'll force-feed this vegetarian cunt three-beef dinners. Man, calcium, kid, the guys are prick. It's basic instinct to wear our stavins to death with a fucking ice-pick. Man, I got no snipe with these type of ars, because I'm sick. Man, I clapped man's wig like, nice wig! And I've been lying to you, Jason. I've been lying to you. But today, I'm gonna tell you the truth and that shit's for free. You know when I said my son wrote calcium, kid, the prick on that pick? It was me. You're fucking god now. Man, I get knocked out. If you wanna hear a raffle with jokes like Tony said, pop round to Doc Browns, imagine a fair man lad somewhere in the pool walking down the street, stopping in their tracks, like, oh hell, dear lord, here come the little boys from Ellsbury Airport. With a name like Calcium Kid, I'm surprised Dico hasn't shagged you in shit. Boxers trying to blag you in shit. But you're such a nice guy, you probably think, thank you in shit. Yeah, giant kids in the battle with clever victims. I came to perform a fucking ecstasy. Your style is so trammier, you are never winning. Fuck you, for Jason Koumac and for Ennich Nixon's tune. Yo, you said that you wrote that, I could tell by the grammar, by the way. Just told you. Calcium Kid is a prick, just gonna put that out there. Yo, I'm down to bet my last bluey on a dead horse to come last. Yo, I'll snuff jab poor McCartney's auto biography out the buck rack. Yo, yo, when I get shushed, yo, when I get shushed in the library, I shush back. Yo, yo, I'm spitting back a deep fried cooking fat, stiff to huff and smack, by the way, what is your left eye looking at? You could be having a lovely chat while checking a running tap on a bubble bath. Yo, I'm such a woolly back, I'll put money that, two packets coming back, and I'll put that on my thug life, Tommy Tatt. I've got one fuck white people. Yo, yo, I love sto always glocks waving. Yo, I'm such a gangster, I own the dark blues and Monopoly when I'm not playing. Yo, yo, I'm not playing. I'm down to make a bad impression, bro, I stabbed my Sifu on my face, karate lessons to combat the tension with a smack injection. Yo, someone tell Jack from Tekken I'm gonna smash his head in, because Ben Affleck didn't die, someone tell Jack from Tekken I'm gonna smash his head in, because Ben Affleck didn't die in the end of Armageddon. Yo, yo, you repeat stuff, you repeat stuff, you repeat stuff. Quick, quick, stop it, stop it. If I repeat stuff, it's because I pick, pick pockets, pockets. You're great. Time, round two, ocean, round two. It's time for the freestyle, this flip. I see whales and I eat snails on a random fucking something else tip. Don't have a clue what you're going on about. I don't know what you're talking about. This is Towson kid, your nan is a flit. Bitch, wipe her pussy with her mouth once you're having a piss. You need to stop chatting your shit and be more careful, or that'll spin you on your head like a b-boy circle, and have you slowly walking away from your life like decoys turtle. The only thing I want to see more than a fucking bum over baking head is to find out online that decoy raped it and that's it, I was dead. And make a better stab a kid up like you live on fucking home streets. This guy will give up his seat foil on the bus whenever the fucking seat on the bus is empty. He is that nice. You are so nice, that shit has got to stop soon. You're so nice every event you offer me a spliff and you haven't even got one. But what he has got is guard dogs, and guard dogs the guard the guard dogs. Well guess what, I've got guard dogs that guard two extraordinarily large frogs. The reason, the reason these two guard dogs guard these large frogs is because if these large frogs get loose they're going to kick shit out of your guard dogs. And if that doesn't get on bad bars, I do not know what happens. Look, don't you tell hostess chill and one step ahead check the photo stills fuck a crew battle. I've got solo skills, I'll put a bouncy on your head just to help out hand solos bills. And tell this faggot sucky, but this homo will. This guy is so racist, if willsy jumped in a battle he'd say, Kolo, chill. Save willsy, gee. I'll bat at his prick, the calcium kid. I'll shatter his ribs with a jab at the fist that you're so mentally fragile, mentally unstable, fragile and thin. I actually feel bad having to win. This guy blames every bad performance that he has on the fact that he's hypoglycemic. In the words of Victor Meldrow, I do not. I don't believe it. Listen, I don't know these there. I'm doing what the fuck that will. But the saying is wrong. These next few bars aren't scientifically proven. They aren't, mate. They aren't. They aren't to me. If you've got low blood sugar levels, you is gay. Cos it's bad news when your life support machine is lucaside. I know hypoglycemia is not contagious, but move away. I have a bottle of lucas when I'm sick. You have 22 a day. And you talk cheap. One punch will knock out four teeth. It's such a woolly back. You're a warm fleece. You're everything. Give me a recipe and I'll cook it for you. You're the chosen one, the golden one. Jason and the Argonauts are looking for you. Get that. Listen. Listen. Casper knows. Casper is the only person who got that far. And I don't know what's worse. The fact that they're shit or they're not even converse. They are shit. I genuinely did not see it on the inside. I did not see that. I was going to take the entire family, the beach, but that plan is cancelled. Because if we're here, who's guarding our sandcastles? No one. No one. That's a fact. Yo. Yo, I don't battle because I don't give enough. We all want different stuff. For instance, you want a bigger cup to put liquor, bro. I want to marry one of the Olsen twins and split them up. Yo. Yo. You simple cunt. You look like Alex Ferguson's kidney bro Yo. You look like you can tell if a chicken's cooked from a finger touch. You look like before you eat ribs, you limber up. Yo. You look like you're stockpiling for the winter months. You look like you don't drink enough. That last one was a lie. Yo. Yo. I bet you butter both sides of your toast. Yo. I bet you butter both sides of your toast. You don't need to hold a knife to my throat to tell you my life is a joke, bro. All of my messenger pigeons have died in the post. Yo. People call me crazy. So I set fire to those and got high off the smoke. I'll overdose and die from a stroke and dig myself out of grave to find the remote to turn your track off. Hats off in that eke drops. I'm pretty sure you had a crack rock. And I have to physically stop him from eating it twice. Yo. That's true. Yo. Yo. You spent half of your time trying to remember what happened the other half of your time. Didn't say that bark as it rhymed. Yo. Yo. In Leeds you got so drunk you tried to dial out on an xylophone and got a dialing tone. Have fun drunk driving home. Bro. Do you still wrestle? Do you still wrestle? Do you remember your skill level? Do you remember cheering for Phil Neville? I heard of Phil Neville because someday the dust will settle and you'll remember you cheered for Phil Neville. Phil Neville. Listen. Let's go. Fucking with O'Shea. This man's high. He said I buzz at both sides of his toast. I do. And the sides. You beating O'Shea. I fucking doubt it. The other half of his trousers he wears with another outfit. This is. Listen. You know O'Shea's got this. You are not sick. I'm fine. I've cheered Phil Neville. You've cheered fucking John Aldridge. Fucking Berlin. You're so loud. Fucking Liverpool. You swat. But everybody likes calcium. Don't be serious. I tell you all a story. Just to reiterate how stupid this dickhead actually is. A couple of years ago we were doing a gig around the corner at Django's Rift. It was one of Max and I said it was scratching space. Calcium tears up. Two bags of weed and a massive split. We're having a great time. We're outside smoking, joking, having a Latin shit. Then down the road in the distance we spot the pig sprite. Sniffer dog in tow. Calcium cleverly dropped the split. The only the only problem is he's been smoking and he's got two bags in his pockets and he proper stink. So I'm thinking what you're all thinking he's got a chip proper quick. That's what we know doing it. Not this prick. He walked over to the busy and said officer that dog is sick. So by this time this dog is going fucking crazy. It's snarling, growling, barking. Jumping all over him. And guess what, Mr. MC, dickhead oblivious does start stroking him. This busy has got a smile from ear to ear. In fact it was even bigger. It was like heeet. He just thinks calcium is taking the piss. So he puts his hands in cuffs. Cuffs his hands. And as my man's getting led away to the fucking van, guess what he screams? Officer, you don't understand. Dogs love me, man. Five hours later he's been charging that. And he comes back on that whole the fucking system, man. The fucking pigs. They always gone too far. They always just go too far. He's like they're all knobbed. No, you are. You stroke the sniffer dog with a pocket full of skunk. What a fucking cunt. Listen, I don't know what the fuck you've been smoking but fuck you. I'm joking. If there's a fat man who's got big tits, you bum gays breasts sack coming to battles dressed in your fucking sundaes vest. Oh, yeah! Yeah, that was a punch. I didn't know if there was a punch. I think I won't go to that punch. Oh, I forgot. No, no, no, no. Yo. Fuck this, Vital. Here are a list of words about why I should fight Krista Berg. In music, stick to sniffing paint thinner on your 8th biter before you make dinner the family yo true story yo yo I come with 11 tabby cats sitting on a right cross with tonight's quap I might put go faster stripes on my bike shop but that would involve buying a bike shop so I might not I'll knock your lights out and tell my nan you left the whole light on she hates that again she fucking hates that yo yo I chew truffles I hang out in the park I hang out in the park harassing cute couples with bruised knuckles let me know if I'm too subtle yours truly brother break your leg and show up in there you need dressed like George Clooney like talk to me yo yo if I made a if I set fire to a wicker man filled with a sacrificial lamb you'd climb inside and eat it as fast as that you can yo that's a fact it's free lamb yo shut the fuck up you shit cunt just kicked the shit out of big dunk who's on drugs yo I'm trying to win the Tour de France on foot I'll knock every time I have the leak up with one punch