 I'm the Comic Weekly Man, the Jolly Comic Weekly Man, and I'm here to read the funnies to you happy boys and honeys. Yes boys and girls, it's comic weekly time and here I come right into your house to bring a little fun and happiness. Right out of the pages I've popped the comic weekly straight into your living room, your friend the Comic Weekly Man, the Jolly Comic Weekly Man. Hello, hello, hello. Well, little Miss Honey, how are you today? I have to start the school again. Well, doesn't that make you happy? Oh yes, yes, of course, all my schoolmates again because some of them were away to camp, you know, and others were on trips, you know, and others went to other places, you know, so I didn't see them all the time during vacation, see. Yes, I see, and then there'll be your teacher too, you know. Oh yes, it's her. And I know you're anxious to learn a lot and know things about the world and about life. Yes, especially about life and people and what they do in different places. School is part of the year when you just come back. Well, I'm glad to know that you're anxious to go to school again, and I hope you have a very successful year. Thank you. Now, could you please read the sunnish? Puck the Comic Weekly? Yes. Very well, I'll read that in just a moment, but before I do, let's listen to this nice man. Now, here we go with Puck the Comic Weekly, and on the first page under bringing up father, Beatle Bailey. Magic words for the music, please. Very well, my lady. Toot me a toot and tweet me a tweetle. Squeeze out music for Bailey, the Beatle. Out at the army camp where Beatle is stationed, Beatle is walking alone. He crosses the road. A major is approaching in a jeep. He sees Beatle. Hey, look out! Too late. Beatle is hit. And lands on the ground. The major exclaims, Ouch! I hit my nose on the windshield. And in a second, two lieutenants gather around the major. Hey, I've got a nosebleed. A hemorrhage of the proboscis. Call an ambulance. Oh, lying on the ground. Looks up to the lieutenant and moans. I've got a pain in my... Take it easy, major. Take it easy. The ambulance will be right here. Last picture, top row, the lieutenant says to the other lieutenant, we'd better give him first age treatment for shock. Beatle lifts his leg and says to the lieutenant, Hey, my leg is... Hey, quick man, quick man, the stretcher. The major's hurt. Hey, quick man, the stretcher. The major's hurt. Major, he's hurt. Yes, sure. One stretcher coming up. First picture, bottom row, the major is loaded on the stretcher. Now, men, no need for all this first time. Probably all right. Now, you'll let the head surgeon decide that after he gives you some tests on x-rays. And still lying on the ground. Beatle says faintly, My arm, my arm. Okay, major, in you go. And the major is slated to the ambulance. Here, have a cigar, sir. It'll calm your jangled nerves. Thanks, lieutenant. Thanks. And suddenly the major exclaims, Say, we've been thinking about my injuries so much, we almost overlook something. Beatle thinking the major has finally remembered him, sits up with a smile. Call the motor pool and have him give my Jeep a check over. Yes, sir, major. Right away, major. And Beatle thoroughly discussed it, gets to his feet. Fui, I'll go and pull on my own bandages. He starts to walk off. Hold it, soldier. And last picture, the lieutenant grabs Beatle by the collar and drags him back. You can be court-martialed for leaving the scene of an accident, you know? Beatle, everybody fusses over the major just because he bumped his nose against the windshield, but nobody pays any attention to Charles and Beatle, and he was hit by the Jeep. Instead, they grab him by the collar and drag him back when he wants to leave. Nope, it looks like Beatle is in trouble. I'm afraid so. Well, now let's turn over the page and go past little iodine and Prince Val. Turn over to page four and look on page five. There's Walt Disney's The Sword in the Rose, a romantic story which takes place in the early days of England, when Henry was the king. And I've been worried about this because the king's sister, Mary, is in love with Charles Brandon, who is handsome and brave and daring. And the two of them ran away to get married, but the king captured them and has thrown Charles Brandon in jail. And he said he was going to have Charles Brandon put to death if the princess didn't marry that old king of France. And so, in order to save Charles Brandon's life, the princess has said that she would marry the king of France. Well, let's read now and find out if he does. Here we go with The Sword in the Rose. It's Mary, Mary, England, when knighthood was in flower, music to bewitch our story hour. The day has come when the English princess is to marry the king of France. She has gone to France where the wedding is to take place. We are at Addieville Cathedral. Amid the clanger of bells and the booming of cannon, Mary Tudor becomes the wife of the agent Louis XII to save the life of the man she loved. Third picture top row. That evening in the banquet room of the castle, the old king rises to his feet, looks at the lovely young princess, holds aloft a goblet of wine and offers a toast. Noble knights, come pledge with me your love and devotion to the queen of France. Meanwhile, across the sea in a cold cell in London Tower, Charles Brandon languishes. Without a word of what has happened, the Duke of Buckingham had promised Mary he would tell Charles that she has married the king of France to save Brandon's life, but he has not kept his promise, nor has he set Brandon free after the marriage as he had promised to do. First picture bottom row, Brandon heals the door to his dungeon open. At Buckingham. What prompts this extraordinary honor? Yes, it is the Duke at last. He comes into the cell and says, a promise I made to her majesty, the queen of France. She that was married to her, Brandon looks at the Duke with disbelief in his eyes, that his beloved Mary has married someone else. You find it hard to believe that Mary is now the bride of King Louis XII. I, I do. Before she accepted the crown of France and the jewels and the silken gowns, she asked that you be allowed to pursue your interrupted journey to the new world with bitterness in his heart that his Mary had not remained faithful to him. Brandon exclaims, most thoughtful of her. Last picture he looks up. Then, then you'll release me. A look of cunning comes into the Duke's eyes. Well, not openly, Brandon. I dare not grist the king's discipline. But, uh, an escape might be arranged. And the stricken Brandon, mercilessly deluded about Mary's marriage, falls into Buckingham's trap. Oh, that's not right. King Henry said that Charles Brandon could go free after the princess married the king of France. That's right, he did. Well, then why look like Charles is excited? I think this is a trap to get Charles Brandon into more trouble. Oh, that's terrible. Well, maybe we'll find out more about this next week. But now look at the bottom of the page. There's Roy Rogers. Oh, yes. And then Roy was helping a little boy named Chilly, who was being chased by two bad men named Cash Baxter and, and Gaffer. Yes. The boy had found a saddle, and the men were trying to get the saddle away from him. And Gaffer had stolen it from Chilly's horseman. Roy and Chilly had followed him. And just then jumped off his horse over the cliff, taking the saddle with him. I wonder if he was killed. Well, let's read now and find out. Here we go with Roy Rogers, king of the cowboys. Ah, yip-a-yo. Now here we go with Roy and Trigger. Ah, yip-a-yo. Roy looks over the cliff where Gaffer had disappeared. Hey, Chilly, we got to get down into Stone Canyon and try to find that saddle. That boy probably killed Gaffer. Hey, better we take Senior Gaffer's horse to Long Roy. He'll get thirsty here. Meanwhile below on the canyon floor, Gaffer is very much alive. He has landed in a net which had been stretched over some poles and covered with green brush. The net had broken his fall. Last picture top row he stands up, picks up the saddle. Ah, I'll wait in the shack for Cash Baxter. I got pay coming for a killin' Pate Preston and fetchin' his saddle here. First picture bottom row, Gaffer's horse leads Roy and Chilly to the blind end of Stone Canyon. Roy sees the net of chicken wire that had broken Gaffer's fall. Well, so this is the ground Gaffer made the hole in, eh? Camouflaged chicken wire. Hey, a very strange thing, Senior Roy. Inside the cabin, where Gaffer and Cash are talking, Gaffer looks through the window. Hey, Cash, look. Rodgers and the kid. They got my horse. Gaffer, you should have known your horse would seek its own corral. We gotta work fast. Come on. And a second later, the door to the cabin opens and Chilly and Roy enter. They see the room is empty. Chilly points to the table and exclaims, Senior Roy, the saddle. Now, the door opens. Senior Roy, the saddle. Now, maybe we can find out what's hidden in it. It may explain the murder of Marge Preston's uncle. Last picture, Roy examines the saddle. He finds a little compartment in it and in the compartment, two shiny plates. He takes the plates out and exclaims, he takes the plates out and exclaims, counterfeiting plates. Suddenly, Chilly exclaims, Senior Roy, the wall. It is moving. They're sitting in place. Oh, that's what you make false money with, isn't it? That's right. Well, that's against the law. Yes, it is. Well, those two men are really cruel. And they've been hidden behind that false wall and they know that Roy has discovered their secret. Oh, and the wall is moving. I wonder if that means danger for Roy. We'll find that out next week. But now let's go to the very last page of the first section and see what's happening to Flash Gordon. Oh, yes, I'm anxious to know because Flash and Midas and Dale are on their way back from a planet called Titan with that giant they captured. Yes, you bet. But remember as they were nearing Earth, suddenly things looked different? Well, I said that the Earth has changed. Well, let's read now and find out. Here we go with Flash Gordon. Rigorigodundun saskimatash. Let's set music for heroic Flash. Last picture top roll, Midas looks at the giant who was locked in his cage and says, We're going to be rich, boys. That giant has money in the bank. Flash snaps. All right, Midas, cut out the chatter and man your station. You may never get down to the ground to spend your fortune. Stand by for landing. First picture bottom roll, they have landed safely. The cargo ramp has been let down. We're going to be rich, boys. We're going to be rich, boys. We're going to be rich, boys. The cargo ramp has been let down and the chain giant is let out under guard. Flash says, Well, he knows what our guns can do, but be careful, Midas. Then Flash looks around and he stops in amazement. Now it can't be. Look, Midas, at the landing field, at the people. That last picture as men come running up to the rocket ship. Midas and the others see that they tower above them like giants. Flash exclaims, what's the matter with my eyes? A giant looks like the size of a normal Earthman. And we look like midgets. Looks like the same size as a giant, but Flash and the others, they look very tiny. Yes, they look like little midgets, that's Flash says. I wonder what the reason is. Maybe we'll find the answer to this great mystery next week. But now it's time to pick up the second section of the comic weekly. Holy yesterday. But first here's that nice man again with something interesting to say. Now here we go again with Puck the Comic Weekly. And on the first page of the second section, Dagwood and Blondie. Magic words for the music, please. Very well, my lady. Come to the music for Dagwood and Blondie. Dagwood has settled down to read the paper. Blondie comes in and makes a shattering announcement. Come, dear, we're going downtown and buy you a new suit. But I don't need a new suit. Yes, you do. We'll get you a nice new duet. If I have this one cleaned and thrust and you sew the pockets, it'll be just like new. A man in your position must look well-groomed. Come. First picture, second row, they go down Main Street. Blondie sees a woman shop and turns in. Why are we going into a woman shop? First, I want to get a few things for myself. And 15 minutes later, Dagwood is sitting sadly in a chair, watching Blondie pick out a new dress. I think her wife should look nice too. It gives her husband added prestige. A half hour later, last picture, second row, Dagwood is sitting slumped in a chair in a woman's hat shop while Blondie is trying on hats. Dagwood, don't you think it'll be cute if I buy things to match your new suit? You know, a husband and wife ensemble. An hour later, they're in a woman's shoe store and Blondie has tried on one pair of shoes after another. I care for those eyes there. Dagwood jumps to his feet and heads for the door. I'll go out and buy my own suit while you finish your shopping. Okay, dear. I'll meet you later. Three minutes later, Dagwood is in a man's clothing store wearing his old blue suit. He says to the salesman, I want a dark blue suit. Fine, I've got a nice brown one on sale today for 50% off. I'll try it. Five minutes later, last picture, third row, Dagwood wearing a large double-breasted brown suit stares at himself in the mirror. I like it. It fits you perfectly. It doesn't need any alterations. I'll take it. First picture, bottom row, Blondie comes tripping down the street. Dagwood comes out of the store dressed in his new 50% off brown suit. Blondie sees it. The brown was 50% off. No, I'll have to buy another brown suit. Dagwood's hat pops open. Oh, no! Dagwood jerks off his coat, the pants and dashes into the clothing store last picture. I guess, sir, what could I do for you? Oh, it's you. Can I exchange this for a suit that doesn't match anything? Oh, funny. Didn't Dagwood look silly in that new brown suit? Well, he looked a whole lot silly running into the store without the new brown suit. He has to buy a brown outfit to go with his brown funny. Yes, he certainly is funny. Now, how would you like to see what Brur Rabbit is doing? All right, let's turn over the page and go past page two. Turn over page three. And here on page four of the second section is Uncle Remus. Oh, dear old Uncle Remus. And here we go with dear old Uncle Remus and his tales of Brur Rabbit. Play the magic words with me. Hippity hoppity, make it a habit to give us music for old Brur Rabbit. Uncle Remus says sometimes Brur Bar gets too high in the world for his own good. Yep, there have been some bad doings in Brur Rabbit's community. Someone has been stealing all the honey. A delegation of the creeders led by Brur Rabbit has come to Brur Bar's cave. And there they find Brur Bar lying back, taking it easy, surrounded by jugs and pans. And there they find Brur Rabbit taking it easy, surrounded by jugs and pans full of honey. Brur Rabbit shakes his finger in Brur Bar's face. Brur Bar, I suspect you is the one that's been raiding the community haunted creed. Brur Bar dips his finger in the honey and takes a sip. How do you know? It's me. You has got to catch me at the post. If you do it again, us is going to catch you. Brur Bar And sooner than you think, Brur Rabbit has worked out a scheme. Third picture top row, he and the creeders are pulling a tree stump which is on a little wagon out into the woods. And last picture top row, they cover the wheels of the wagon with brush so the wagon cannot be seen. Then Brur Rabbit climbs to the top of this stump and empties a gallon of honey over the top. And Brur Rabbit looks down the road. Hurry up, Donda. I think I see Brur Bar coming. But I'm just ready. Brur Rabbit slides down the tree and they all scamper into the woods and hide. From their hiding places they see Brur Bar approaching. First picture bottom row he comes up to the honey covered tree and stops. The great day create day look at that a brand new drip and honey tree who shinnies up the tree takes a good lick of the honey the man man I is right on top of the Brur World man out of the bushes Brur Rabbit and his pals they give the tree a shove and it starts to roll down the hill with Brur Bar hanging under the top of the tree stump there Brur Bar looks around this here tree has got the wheel right down the hill it goes down the main street of the community and head straight for the jail there and crashes smack into it and last picture Brur Bar some shouts yeah caught in the tree and Brur Bar is back aching from the bump into the jail looks down from his tree stump and groans the eye has been railroaded and Uncle Remus said when the spirit of fevery moves you better get out of the way a very neat one Brur Rabbit set quite a trap didn't he you mean he climbed right up well that was funny well now let's go to the very last page of the comic weekly and remember this is in the early days of America in the state of California and remember that gold had been discovered and everybody left their jobs and homes to go find gold and remember that Dick and his friend Mr. Campbell had gone along to see what they could find well let's read now and find out here we go with Dick's adventures say the magic words with me rickety pack cazack cazack that's the music for adventurous Dick Dick and editor Campbell and the crafty road pickpan reached the American river where thousands are already panning for the precious metal Dick's eyes catch the glitter of something on the ground he leaves off his horse he's stopping me to stop last picture top row he picks up a shiny rock look look a gold nugget and in the next second first picture second row a chorus of voices starts mocking quack quack that's bulls gold you goose Dick suddenly feels foolish editor Campbell says hey buddy Dick if it sticks together it's real gold if it falls apart it's fool's gold high right so for it a barn which looks like gold last picture second row Dick digs his teeth into the nugget to his vast disappointment it splits apart sadly he mounts up and first picture bottom row for the gradually diminishing cries of quack quack the party continues on pickpan says too many gold panners there anyway let's hit out further last picture up a turbulent branch of the American river they plow past ridges topped by towering pines and even here there are crowds of prospectors with more coming in from every side and Dick wonders why don't we ever find a place where we can be to ourselves to dig for some real gold yes but did you ever know that there was something like fool's gold yes that's very good to know well maybe we'll find out more about that next week now look below Dick's adventures there's Rusty Riley and remember that when he came home he found that some actors had made a theater out of an old mill near a stream on their place and one of the men had asked about renting a horse and so Rusty and Patty had brought the man to talk to Tex who I am sure will loan him a horse here we go with Rusty Riley galloped run till the road is dusty give us music for its horse and Rusty Tex arranges to loan a horse from the milestone farm to Mr. Fidgely the director of the theatrical company and Tex has sent Rusty along to take care of the horse now the actors are all gathered around on stage ready for a rehearsal second picture bottom row the stage hand interrupts oh excuse me shorty but there's a guy outside the stage door I want to see he says it's important oh go right ahead shorty we'll take a break shorty walks outside a hard-looking man who was smoking his cigar greets him well shorty you gave us a lot of trouble finding him the boss don't like welchers so it'd be a good idea if you handed over that two grand you owed him he's got to give me a little time this is the first job I've had since last winter have a heart will ya the boss ain't a patient man but I'll give you just one week to get that dough on the line or else last picture shorty goes back into the playhouse to the rehearsal wondering how he will ever get two thousand dollars as he comes on stage he hears the actress Doris Fair speaking to Tweedy Castle the new girl from Lexington what a divine necklace my dear why just lovely oh could gracious Tweedy they're real pearls they didn't get in trouble or get somebody else in trouble we can share the horses some please yes I wonder well we'll find out more about this next week now that's all the time I have but before I go here's that nice fellow with some more interesting information well honey and all your boys and girls I've got to go now alright miss Tweedy it's a date with all your boys and girls be sure to meet me with our little friend miss honey next week when I read Puck the Comic Weekly for I'm the comic weekly man the jolly comic weekly man I'll be back to read the funnies to you happy boys and honey don't forget boys and girls see you all next week your friend the comic weekly man the jolly comic weekly man