 Hi, Kevin. How are you? I'm doing great. Thank you Microphone tapping it. Oh, you turn up. Okay. Yeah, stop turning up the volume is clicking. What do you got for me? So I am 44 Congratulations, I know you're gonna save the danger zone. No, baby. Yeah, you left the danger zone nine years ago You in no man's land. Okay, then why are you here? Because you have a man No man's land meaning what does no man's land mean between 36 and 60 Where all the men are in relationships or they're on the way out of the dirt There are there more men after 36 or before Thank you but You know, there's an exception There's always an exception. But is that how we want to live our lives? What's your question? So my question is I why is it that you feel that there's No, there's no hope for us at 44. No kids. Are you married? Were you ever married? I was married any children No children How long were you married? I was married been nine years Okay, and you guys chose not to have any kids or what? No, we tried Okay, leave it there And y'all got divorced why? because of the massive trying and not happening and I found a slippery slow. I went through a depression and So who filed? I filed On grounds of what? I felt I wasn't worthy You thought you were not worthy? How long ago was your divorce? About 10 years ago All right So you're 44. That was 19 years of your life. You got married at 25 All right, you haven't had a relationship in 10 years. I did I was engaged after and why And why didn't that proceed to marriage? because he enjoys having like a side woman But again, you know back then I just felt like you know, it has to be perfect and well, that's okay So you answered your own question. Why do I feel there's no hope? Because how many chances are bad do you ladies think you're going to get in life? Correct. You've been married. That's more than That's more than 75 of other black women can ever say And you break that Then you mess around and give it another fiance And it's not perfect. So you leave that Well, then I left that so that I can work on me. All right. That's the excuse you good. Okay. That's the Oprah excuse I don't buy that shit. Well, let me let me explain why I don't buy you you ask me let me tell you why because Why you could have worked on yourself in the context of a relationship See you black women have this all or none Yeah, like you can't do multiple things at one time All right, you're right. Then you ask why do I feel like there's no hope? Well, if you spend most of your time breaking up in relationships and not working out stuff You've got more history that and especially at 44 And that pattern is pretty well said So it's not that there's no hope. It's just that uh, it becomes infinitesimal But you did say that women and mad should come correct Get your shit together before you come Into a relationship with someone else. So if you know that there's challenges that you're dealing with While you're single not in a relationship, but while you're single Yeah, but but but I guess true However, 40 You said you had a nine-year marriage that you that you divorced from And you had a relationship That you left because he's cheating Yeah And you never cheated I have Exactly And how long ago that did that end? about maybe seven years ago And what have you been doing since then? Well, that's when I started working on myself But see that's that's what I don't understand seven years man. That's 37 or 44 Jesus Christ, how long ago I was supposed to french toast word That's what I mean. Yeah. I was like well, I'm gonna work on myself Uh, that's another way to say I'm going to just sit here and give it to God We've allowed y'all to do this You know But I'm saying it's correct, but it took me that time to realize it and you know, well, here's the unfortunate part um The men women your age tend to want Are you what the men you want want? I believe so Okay, uh Children are off the table. Um What do you need? What do you need for a man financially? For him to hold it down What does that mean? So what that means is you know As a woman and put a dollar value on it. Don't don't don't give me the yearbook answer At least at least a minimal of six figures I Are you kidding? I'm not kidding I laugh man because I'm trying to keep it light, but The next questions I'm going to ask was how tall are you? I'm five two dress size It's a small What is that? He said what is that? Yeah That's nice too Okay, but even if you're 44 the dress size two A man who's making who is at least your age or older earning a hundred thousand dollars What do you think he wants from a woman? Children Of course And barring that And barring that If he's not going to go get a woman as children he's going to get a woman with uh Lessons put it this way less damage Do you care if he's black or not? I do care if he's black So what percentage of black men earns eight out of six figures of me? It's a small percentage. What percentage is that? About Five ten percent right And you got to ask a very hardcore question You are nine out of ten men are not good enough for you What in the blue glazes are you bringing to the table to make you the better choice out of all of those women? They want that 10 percent of men Well the fact that I know what it takes not one now than before about holding the man down in reference to Being a woman Um, now you want to compete against a 27 year old who knows all that from the rip That's if they know that a lot of the 27 years old don't Yeah, but to can't see you just see what you what older women tend to do You tend to paint yourself the best case scenario that younger women are like I was And they're not I just got back off a date with a woman in their 20s, and I want to tell you They are not like women in their 40s. I don't date women in your age range, and I'll tell you why because It's just more problematic You got more things that have happened life has happened And This may be hard to hear, but there's really nothing new with an older woman You've likely already on your own home. You have your car. You've been here. You've been there It's all standard in no It's all standard in no asset What you have yet to say is what women like yourself at your age are bringing better than younger women And you have to be able to articulate that if you expect somebody to buy it That's why I laugh because I've seen this so many times you want to ask women like well, I just know how to hold a man down Okay, you want to tell me what that means? It's not yet, but I wanted to let you finish and you want to talk over you But it's not it's holding it down is be able to be his partner in a sense as far as Men really want a woman that knows how to communicate compromise Be able to know how to cook clean Have fun travel be a partner be his be his Be his supporter It's not it's not just about um Just to be there just to be his friend. It's more than that Okay, how many men do you know earn the kind of money you're talking about? I know quite a few Because of my environment all right Most men don't are not looking for a woman to be a partner They're looking for a help me. They're not looking for somebody to travel with Man, what you described is what many women are looking Often the men that I know have always known this area. Don't say the things you said They're looking for fit feminine friendly. He has cooperative submissive You know feminine skills those kind of things, but they're also looking for somebody who For for for lack of better word. It's teachable. It's trainable a woman is going to have to be Tailored to you At 44 there's not much tailoring It's I know how to do this Not true Hmm, even to this day. I'm always going to learn All right. Well, if that's the case Then we should see worldwide Men in the top 10% of earnings Choosing to marry women in their matter years versus the earlier years Is that what we see not real not a lot of it What does that tell you? I don't know why you guys keep going back to that. It does exist. See What you have yet to do is say That $100,000 is ridiculous You effectively I mean, I mean no disrespect men, but I don't understand how you ladies come through here and automatically think you have What it takes to remove 90% of men What do you bring it to the table is so special Well, you can automatically demand the top 10% of men Because basically you're looking at the other 90% of men that says you're not good enough off the rip just because of your money So I accept that yes I accept that and I'm just as harsh with women if women are going to come in and say he needs to make like six figures I'm going to say I accept it Then you're going to have to tell me what the French toast you're doing to to negate 90% of men because you're telling them that they're not good enough So it's about time That's not true. I never said that they weren't good enough. You just said what I would like Okay, I don't I'm trying to play semantics man. I said what what you said he needs to rank at least six figures Yeah, he's not making at least six figures. He's not what you want. Oh didn't say that. I didn't say if he's not I'm expecting. I'm talking to a grown-up in 44. I'm not playing word games You act when I want but however, I am I am flexible You have to be flexible and be able to compromise you could you always you always want to score You know score high. However, you could meet somewhere down in the middle if you don't get it We're not always going to get everything we want. We can ask for it, but it's not that we're always going to get exactly what we want Tell us it's somebody who believes it You can't I believe what you said after it because you've had The better part of five minutes to to say that Now you're back pedaling And no point in the last five minutes if you made this while I'm flexible Why are you flexible now? Please don't get in the comment section. I'm not there No, I I looked up so you asked me why I say and man If you go back and look at this conversation If you can objectively go back and look at it. It's because You are presenting as a 44 year old woman with 44 year old old experience and and uh requirements and expectations and com and ways to conference and to talk Younger women typically don't do this um verbal judo that a lot of old women like to do Because they still have hope They're still like I'm still young hot this and that for I can just tell you what it is Old women tend to be like well, you know And guys aren't trying to play games. You're just trying to understand what it is I'm making no judgments about that you want somebody to make a six-figure because I do believe that's what you want Because are you making that kind of money Then then human nature tells me that that's what you want women are hypergamous by nature One a man having least what you have. Well, unfortunately Only eight percent of black men earn what you earn. That's married unmarried gay straight, whatever And they don't want what you're saying and you still use the question is there is Little to no hope for women who are 44 years old Wanting a black man in the top eight percent of black men Because honestly your competition is too stiff with just black women that doesn't even include the other So my question is why is the man making $50,000 not enough? Not that he's not enough We can play that game I've I've dated that they were making $50,000 Okay, why is he why is that why is the bar not 50? I like to set my set my stand is high and I don't get it. Okay, man, but do we do You like to set your standard high Are you up there? Well sexual marketplace value Are you up there? On the sexual market market place value. Yeah, so your standard is high. So you like to set your asking price high Okay, then is your value on the same market? Is it high? I don't think it's that high You don't think it's So I want to be clear. You're saying your asking price is higher than what you think your value is Yeah, I don't think it's I don't think what I'm asking for is a lot Oh, so what I'm asking you is whatever you feel like you're asking for is it higher than what you Is who you are Higher than what you're asking for or is it low? Yeah Who you are higher who I am and what I'm asking for Who you are who you are the sexual marketplace value is higher than You say sexual market marketplace value as far as who I am actual marketplace value is simply this man You have a you have a number on your head like the rest of us You are a zero to ten and look you're a zero to ten and figure You're a zero to ten and a gribble is femininity cooperative. It all comes out to a number zero to ten You're there And eight to nine and tens can get the higher can can is what men who tend to be in the top 10% typically shoot for See you ladies don't tend to analyze yourself correctly So you say a hundred thousand dollars is not that much. Okay Well, what you're telling me is That's kind of low compared to what you bring to the table It's a fair deal No, it's at that. I would say my value. It's I'm I'm marketing based on my value as well And what is your value based on? Based on what I bring to the table Okay, which is my personality And um my feminine side as well And with age, I'm still willing to learn I'm learning today Um I don't believe just because a man comes in and wants to teach me something new that oh, I got it I actually will let him be the man You know That takes a lot for somebody my age because most of the time for us. We're stuck in our in our ways, but I'm not Is any of that what mean value? Sorry is any of that stuff you just said what mean value? Based on conversations I had with some of the man. Yeah But based on what I'm hearing on your show, you're saying no Right because now Men value your femininity your youth your fertility The cooperativeness and your submission So I've asked this question from women As a business person what product On the market increases in value with age and use But that's what you ladies continue to do Because you are getting older and because you feel like your experience or who you are is Trump's a younger woman That it should increase your value, but it doesn't It's your age It's lower than it was Your value is less than it was 10 years ago Which is less than it was 10 years before that But you're asking for earnings and a man That women in their 20s At the peak of their sexual market plays value This is what I think a lot of you ladies don't seem to either want to accept or understand Your sexual your value to a man Is not your income your education of your experience Yes, that I already know All right, so when I say why does he need to make six figures? It's Why is $50,000 not enough? Because man, what you're bringing to the table what you told me quite honestly It seems to be rather average You're not bringing anything extraordinary You're not bringing anything below. You're bringing pretty much average what a woman can bring to the table I haven't heard it. I mean unless I'm missing something Is there something that you have that you feel like you're bringing this extraordinary or above average That's not educated. That's not education or income my asset race, huh? My personality Your personality My personality My mindset I'm gonna be open-minded I think you understand that There's no way for somebody to really quantify a personality without deciding to pick you And open-minded man Quite honestly, you may be open-minded for who you used to be But they're women who are from who are raised to be a companion to a man who are far more open-minded So what I'm saying is The things you're saying That's still pretty average So And how we got here is why do you say that there's no hope? Well, there's no hope for women I don't say there's no hope, but it's extremely small for women who are demanding such a high price And they bring so little to the market that the men who have that who can pay that price more And the net of it is men are not going men who have options are going to get the best deal They can And I agree I still have my my own opinion where I feel like For myself, I I don't feel like there's no hope You know, I don't feel like there's no hope There was no hope but I mean sure, but how much is enough how much but what percent out of 100 percent how much hope is enough for you My fair question. You keep sending us hope. So how much hope is enough for you? That's your question It's just I'm just saying what it is I don't know what you haven't told me, but what I'm trying to understand is you said there's hope I'm said okay, but out of 100 percent how much hope is enough for you Oh Probably a small probably a small percentage, but doesn't mean you said it's zero Well, what is it though? It's not at zero. Then what is it? Maybe at 20 percent, you know because of the age bracket and where I'm at Okay, so 20 percent pretty liberal for 20 percent So you are so you're willing to risk dying alone No, I'm not listen. I didn't finish the question You're willing to risk a 20 percent hope that you can get this six-figure man versus getting Lowering it down to where you got about a better than 80 percent shot of getting a man No, but I didn't say that I that I If I don't get the hundred that there's no way I'm gonna go back. I would go. I would decrease I never said I wouldn't I asked you about the $50,000 year guy. You said it. No Well, because I had it and he wasn't even able to sustain Well, the point is ma'am see what you're missing is that you We can play back and forth man, but I asked you about the $50,000 year guy Which is the median income for me in this country most men make that Most of the men you run across are going to make that Most But I'm not all right. Well, this is what and so so to people who are confused and why I say Average your best die alone is because women are willing to take a small hope You say 20 it's nowhere close to being 20 percent. It's close to about five Okay, five percent not how many think five I think argue close about two because you talk about eight percent of men We're talking about eight percent of men You eight percent of men period then they have to be in your area. What state are you? New York They have to be in your area. They have to be in your age range. They have to be unmarried and heterosexual And it's an extremely small group of men if I actually told you how many the physical number of men black men earn six figures and more It is less Let's just do it real quick Let's do it real quick Let's go. Let's do a rough number The 40 million black people in this country right Half of men half of women So that's roughly 20 million black men 20 million black men multiply that times point eight. It's just point eight 1.6 million But we still have to adjust it for age. Let's just say half Of the men are marrying age 18 or above half That means 800,000 800,000 black men of marrying age that earn $100,000 or more 800,000 and they are spread out across the united states. That's not adjusted for marital status sexual orientation So if you take half of the net you take a half of that number And you take half of that number we did this number before you want to know what it came out to be I'll tell you what the number came out to be when we crunched it about a year and a half ago That's what the number came out to be 181,000 black men earned six figures or more of marrying age heterosexual 181,000 and 20 And if you say 20 million black women Half marrying age 10 million and you say one in four will marry you so you say 75 7.4 7.4 million 7.5 million women looking for 181,000 black men Now you want to tell me 20 percent? Let's do it. Let's divide it by seven and a half million point zero two four percent Not 20 That's very low Even if you multiply it times a hundred Even if you say that number is off Kevin your math is off multiply that number times a hundred still 2.4 percent I don't just get up here and talk shit. I don't just get out and pull numbers out. I don't just make up stuff No, that's what I respect you. So my point is you're you're saying there's a hope There's a hope. Is there really a hope with that small number? No, I'm I wasn't saying a hope for that amount just saying hope in general for a woman like myself Yeah, if you start having realistic expectations But you haven't seen to have any realistic expectations on this call It's all it's been more towards well It's hopeful, right? You know, I don't think I'm gonna do that a breakdown on youtube I'm gonna actually just throw a number of this so women can get their mind around How many men this really is so y'all can all realize oh by the way That that percentage of men 181 thousand 7.5 million black women are looking for Also a percentage of every other race of women too Yeah so Would it make more sense to lower something as arbitrary as money down With especially as you guys get older But I will tell you that if you were on instagram tuesday one two three four black women That was a woman there was 41 years old $200,000 earnings. She was saying the same stuff you seen There's on that same stream one two three One woman said she wanted a guy making 500 four three women It's like I've been doing this show since May And from 18 To 70 from g ed to phd. You're all looking for the same 185,000 people Now Honestly, did you ever really think that the number of men that were making that much money was that small? No No And that's what people keep selling you hope Buy this book don't forget this don't think like a man act like this Come to this seminar buy this course. That's what they're they're selling you hope And you're fine, but they don't have but what you think what one thing you notice you go to all those conferences All those book signings and it's a bunch of hope field Women and no men Yeah I get 15,000 people and there's an 80% man And the men are sitting minus. Thank you Thank you for sitting something. So y'all ladies know i'm not just talking to myself So 44 you don't seem to have a horrible attitude because a lot of sisters would have been Yeah But it's that it's that math number is the income that's going to kill it man If you gotta have a man that's earning Uh 100,000 hell if you gotta have a man that's earning 75,000 that's still I mean 80,000 that's still only 15 percent of men That just effectively doubles that number to 0.04 You gotta drop it down to I mean honestly at 44 years old It would be more and more sense to find somebody who just to finish out life with Somebody who I trust and respect He's gonna go out and get my insulin. I'm gonna put his teeth in I'm talking I'm talking about you're gonna grow that old too I'm saying you're gonna do for him. He's gonna do for you My mother got married and she didn't anyway my mother Smartened up and women unlike my mother they died along She picked the most unlike the guy that I ever could think of because she's smart and out And my mother was a very attractive woman had options. So I mean, I hope this has been helpful to let you know that I just don't say that there's no hope For no reason. I say the hope is very very small. I don't know how much hope 0.024 is But when you think it's 20 and it comes out this 0.024 to me, that's zero Yeah All right, appreciate it. Thank you. All right. Let me let me just let me do some math real quick So let's let's take zero point Let's take uh zero point two four Zero point two four and let's just multiply it times one That if if you try to convert that to money There is no unit of there is no unit of coinage. That's point zero two four. That's that's not even the penny That's 25 percent of one penny No, no point zero point zero It's point zero one two four you're looking at it after I multiply times 100 says two percent Is uh two tenths of a percent It's two tenths of a percent not two percent 181 000 divided by seven point five million