 couldn't be with us this week. He is taking some well temporary CO, face-plated Cobra Command. Cough Cough Cough Cough Cough Cough Cough Cough Cough Cough Cough Cough Cough Cough Cough Cough Cough Cough Cough Cough Cough Cough Cough Cough Pardon me, snaking my throat. Today, we are going to be taking a look at a very singular vehicle in the Cobra Command Arsenal, The 1987 Cobra Bus Boar. The Cobra Buzz Board was first introduced in 1987. It was also sold in 1988 and was discontinued in 1989. In 1989 it was not replaced by any similar vehicle, because the Buzz Board is utterly unique in the annals of Cobra's military machine. The Cobra Buzz Board is what is classified as a monowheel vehicle, which is defined as a one-wheeled single-track vehicle. Unlike a unicycle though, the rider is seated either inside of or adjacent to the wheel-ring, as opposed to above it. Extensive research has turned up no instances of any real-world military applications for monowheel designs, aside from the use of pedal-powered monowheels in the Chinese army, possibly used for the development of balance, or perhaps just for fun. And now, let's take a closer look. The most prominent feature of the Buzz Board is, of course, the boar's teeth, which the blueprints inform us are specially hardened, variable-pitched digging teeth. They are made of a red rubber and fit relatively snugly around the circumference of the main body of the Buzz Board. When played with on carpet or other grippy surfaces, the blade spin fairly easily, and the effect is pretty great. However, I do recall that my childhood Buzz Board was particularly snug and did not spin well, so I am unsure if that is a common problem with the Buzz Board or not. It is possible that this example has loosened with age. The right-hand side of the Buzz Board has a forward-hinging scissor-wing door, which rotates roughly 160 degrees to allow for entry into the main cabin. The door has molded-in, rearward-facing vision vents, whose only real purpose is to allow you to see the figure when it is inside of the vehicle. Over the door's hinge is a very cool-looking cobra emblem, which is a separately molded piece. The interior of the cabin has a few molded-in features, like what appears to be a vent grill and possibly some speakers for a comm system. The pilot's seat is made of orange plastic and has fairly little detailing, just a headrest, some ribbed seat cushioning, and a joystick, presumably for steering the vehicle. Though the fit is so tight in the cockpit, I would not recommend attempting to get your figure's hand around said joystick. There are no viewports or even a view screen for the pilot of the Buzz Board. This vehicle is driven blind. I will return to that point later. Placing your figure inside the Buzz Board is a special trick in itself. Allow me to demonstrate. Drat, I'll need a troop. Actually, this was a gift. Maybe I'll just open this regularly. So, as I was saying, the clearance for the main cabin is too small to squeeze a figure in the way one might normally attempt to, in order to fit your figure inside, you must first pose it into the sitting or fetal position. Then, with the figure laying sideways, tuck the head in first, then the feet. And finally, rotate the figure into the sitting position. To remove, reverse the procedure. Or comes equipped with two Destro anti-obstacle or DAO missiles. They do not have pegs but are held in place by wedging one of their fins into slots on the side of the vehicle. These slots are temperamental and the missiles often fall out. When purchasing on the aftermarket, make sure both missiles are included and that all four of their fins are intact. On the opposite side of the Buzz Board are what the blueprints call pounder, 50 caliber, dual-repreting machine guns. Although I am relatively sure that's a typo and they meant to say dual-repeating machine guns. My research has not found any dual 50 cal machine guns that look anything like the ones mounted on the Buzz Board. The Canon has a roughly 180 degree rotational arc but is not permanently affixed to the fuselage. It is attached over the port into which the cabin seat is pegged into. The Canon comes off fairly easily so it is another item to make sure is included with your Buzz Board when purchasing on the aftermarket. Now, let's take a look at the packaging. The front of the box has some beautiful artwork of the Buzz Board in action driven by a Cobra Viper. It appears to be coming up out of the ground and firing both its dual 50 cal machine guns and one of its DAO missiles. The Viper has opened the cockpit door presumably to see where he's going and what he's shooting at as the cabin has neither windows nor a view screen. On the left side of the box printed in bold block letters is the name of the vehicle, the Cobra Buzz Board with the caveat in parentheses informing the buyer that weapons do not shoot. In case any parents out there were concerned they were purchasing a lethal weapon for their child they can now rest easy. The top of the box has the standard GI Joe logo with the Cobra Enemy logo emblazoned over the top of the red, white and blue stripes. Beneath the GI Joe logo is the subtitle a Cobra Command Vehicle. The sides and bottom of the box repeat the name of the vehicle and the front artwork of the box. The back of the box has a photo of the vehicle and a breakdown of the parts included inside the box. It also includes a description of the vehicle with its large rotating wheel the board digs underground to cache top secret implements of destruction. The bottom corner of the box informs us that enclosed within the box are top secret blueprints for our Cobra Command files. The Cobra Buzz Board was worth one flag point and retailed for about $3.50 so roughly the same ballpark as a standard action figure. Now getting back to the operation of the Buzz Board I believe that what we have here isn't a Cobra Assault Vehicle. Without any way for the pilot to steer the Buzz Board no view screen or forward facing window and no additional wheels or thrusters with which to effect a change in direction. I believe that what we in fact have here is a Cobra Kamikaze Vehicle. It would certainly be just like Cobra to launch its soldiers at the enemy without any concern for their safety. I suspect that the machine guns and missiles are there merely to give the Cobra Pilots a false sense of security. The Buzz Board will just plow through whatever is in its path until it eventually is stopped. Hopefully at that point the pilot can emerge and continue to inflict damage upon their adversaries but if not that would hardly be of any concern to Cobra Command. Of course you can't sell a Kamikaze Vehicle as a children's toy so you have to come up with some cover story like a vehicle that supposedly burrows underground in a bug's bunny style. Only to pop up and surprise the enemy before taking that left-turned Albuquerque. But we all know the score. Those missiles and that machine gun would both be immediately sheared off if the Buzz Board actually did burrow under the ground. Not to mention that the cockpit would be filled with earth and the pilot suffocated through those rearward facing vents. No, the Buzz Board is Cobra's diabolical Kamikaze soldier delivery system. The Cobra Buzz Board is very decidedly on the sci-fi end of the military vehicle spectrum. As a general rule, I prefer my tech to be more grounded in reality when it comes to GI Joe. However, I usually grant Cobra more leeway in this regard. I don't really have a good rationale for that other than they're the bad guys and it's more fun to have GI Joe overcome greater odds to achieve their victories. I've always enjoyed the Buzz Board. It's a perfect balance of the absurd and bad ass. Essentially a giant weaponized buzz saw blade that you ride in. It looks dangerous, it sounds dangerous, and that makes for some exciting playtime. And that concludes my review of the Cobra Buzz Board. If you enjoyed it, please give this video a thumbs up on YouTube and don't forget to subscribe. There are a lot of great GI Joe toy reviews coming up that you won't want to miss. Don't forget to like hooded Cobra Commander 788 on Facebook and follow him on Twitter. You get a lot of updates there you won't find anywhere else. Tune in next time for another vintage GI Joe toy review. Get ready for the GI Joe code. Look out Cobra, better clear the road cause Joe's coming at you with an armored tow. For more firepower, Joe Hawes in the Coastal Defender the sides fold down, reveal a mobile missile station. It's right down in Tunnelrack. But Cobra's fighting back with the Bore. Mr. Bore! Riven law, Cobra Bore, gotta be trouble bore. We are real American heroes. Live the adventure of GI Joe, road towed Coastal Defender, Cobra Bore, figure so separately. Joe Joe!