 Hey there friends, how's it going? My name is Kevin and today we're going to be playing some Christmas games. We're going to try and amp ourselves up, prepare ourselves for bad gifts by playing bad Christmas games. I say bad but it's just a feeling. I don't actually know what we're going to be playing yet. I'm just going on to Steam and typing in Christmas. Ooh, that's some holiday cheer. Oh, what about this one? Euro Truck Simulator 2. Christmas Paint Jobs Pack. No, the video would be too long if I went in and played that. Did I just get addicted? Man of the House Christmas Special. It doesn't look like my type of game, just looking at the previews. Santa's Story of Christmas. 11 positive reviews, that's good enough for me. Yeah, only one negative. I'm dreaming of a better Christmas. But honestly, one negative is pretty good. Like, I buy my toothpaste based on 9 out of 10 dentists agreeing with it. If 10 out of 11 gamers agree this is a good game, I think it's a good game. 10 Euro, good lord. Oh my god, while I'm waiting for it to load, I found this. And the description is Christmas didn't go according to plan. This year Santa Claus changed his plans. That comes out on Christmas Day, so if you're looking forward to that for something fun to do on Christmas with the whole family. Alright, Santa's Story of Christmas is done. Let's start a game. Tutorial. No, he can skip. I'm very good at being Santa. It's me, Satan. What the hell is this thing? That looks terrifying. No, I want the story. This is just terrible. It sure is. All the presents are gone. Stolen. There's only one creature that would do something like this. Only one creature has the strength. Yeah, talking about me. Wait, why were you telling me about that? Telling me to stop it when you're going out to do it? How is this lagging so much? Every time you jump, he gives a hoot instead of a hole. But then if you double jump, it just sounds like the worst hiccups ever. Oh my god, Santa lives in the feckin void. What is this? Is this what global warming is doing? It's all melted. Oh my god, it's so laggy. He just ragdolls. How is there so many performance issues with this? This is the cyberpunk of Christmas. What was that? Wait, no, do it again. Do it again. Come here. Even if you run into the back of him, it's just that weird animation where you still die. I don't know if this is copyright free music. I genuinely don't know, so we're going to put it on silent. Oh my god, now it's so eerie. Who? Who? Oh, I don't like this at all. You know what he's trying to do? He's trying to say who? Who did this? Who made me? Alright, he's just doing an owl impression. I don't know, to be honest. I just met the guy. This game is just delightful. I have no idea what's going on. But I'm starting to agree with that one dentist who didn't like this game. Oh, what's this? It's like Crash Bandicoot. This game is essentially Crash Bandicoot. Well, let's see. Oh, I thought you'd get a secret level, but no, I didn't. This game's better than Crash Bandicoot. You get the rewards for jumping on the side platform with none of the effort. Honestly, I think Santa's just having a wild fever dream. I don't think he's able to deliver gifts this Christmas. He seems unwell. They were lying there like this. What? What is that achievement for? There's no jump on the platform or anything. You just walk on and you just wait and that's it. There's no challenge at all with it. It's a very strange one. I think he's screaming, but no one can hear him. Sorry, Santa. The adventure begins. Honestly, I think that's where the adventure ends. I don't think there's much to this game. You can now play the classic mode. You know, this whole game is a classic. This will be like the home alone of Christmas games. Every Christmas, the family will break this out and you'll all be wrestling each other like, I want a turn. No, it's my turn on Santa's Story of Christmas. Mom said it's my turn playing Santa's Story of Christmas. You've been playing for seven hours. Killer Penguin, run. Run, Santa Claus. Look, I'm making it to the castle. I don't know why I'm going to a fucking castle. Oh my God, Santa, where are you going? Wait a second. This isn't Santa. This is Satan. It explains everything now. This world is actually hell. Santa can get some serious forward momentum, by the way. If I run and jump, you can just launch yourself. They're Christmas turtles. Like, who has an evil lair like this reefed a parkour across lava and then goes, You'll never make it past my evil turtles. This could be a long trip. Oh, fuck that. No, dude, I can't. I said last level I was going to quit and yet I'm still here. I'm just curious to see where the levels go. Like, this has just gone straight into the fall, guys. Universe. All of a sudden, giant ball and chain swinging from nothing. What happens if I get hit by it? I got to know before I quit. Of course, I just flop like everything else. All right, well, Santa's done. Santa's killing himself now. We're done on this game. This looks cool. You and Santa Claus flew to distribute gifts to children passing one of the forest. Santa Claus lost control and crashed into a tree. Oh, it's not out yet. God damn it. Why can't you let me enjoy the time before Christmas? Like, if they all come out on Christmas Day, how am I supposed to choose between Save Christmas and the other one that I'm not saying out loud? For fuck's sake, this one doesn't release until the 23rd and it looks so fun. You get to be a bully and they hit those kids with snowballs. Oh, why can't I play this? Home invasion at the cheap price of free. I like the sound of that after getting ripped off last time. Yes, look at this. This is the right kind of terrifying. I send it. There are so many presents to deliver Christmas with only a few days to prayer. Blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah, blah. Okay, I'm ready. Okay, so I got to place the presents as quietly as possible. Whoa, whoa, whoa. What's happening here? The music's kicking up a little bit. Oh, I'm whistling. That is so obnoxious. These dummy robots aren't finding me luckily enough. Okay, can you stop playing the dubstep? How are they not waking up from the dubstep? Never mind me sneaking into their house. It's just throwing down the presents, making as much noise as possible. They're all smashed inside. Oh, cookies, yum. Oh no, they've got Santa. Oh God, don't wake up, don't wake up, don't wake up. There's a bearded man standing over you. You don't want to. You'll never recover from this. Now you're just trying to make it hard, putting the stocking on your bed. Oh no, oh no, oh no, oh no. Don't come in, dude. Oh, for fact's sake. Don't put on cheery music. It's pissing me off. How do I murder Santa Claus? Oh, fuck off. I'm done. I'm done with this game. I don't like it. I prefer the other one. Unfortunately, like right at the end of playing that, and I'm blaming it on the first game. I think it was just a late onset of the symptoms. But my vision started going really blurry. And I couldn't see. And then I got a massive, you know what? I can't even really do it justice. Let this guy describe it for you. Do you feel angry? Sad? Tense? No. I feel sick. I have a bad headache. Thank you. Sorry, I just can articulate myself as well as he can. But let's jump back into more Christmas games. Could this have been what caused it? Oh, that one didn't even go on right. It made it worse. What the hell is this garbage? Christmas elf will help you to fully decorate your Windows desktop for Christmas. Are they even in the right format? I don't think they are. Okay. I was getting this like ironically, but this is actually kind of cool. I like this. Oh, yeah. More snow. More. Slower though. Slower snow. Oh, wait. No, that just looks laggy. All right. Speed it up a little bit. What the hell is this? It's only some web page now. Enable the tree. Yes. Wow. Look, you can put it on top. So like it'll always be over what you're doing, which is kind of inconvenient because like when it opened that web page earlier, you can't see the minimize or X out button. Not that you'd ever want to. What are you? Some kind of Grinch? Overall, the 10 out of 10. I love the software. This looks frickin' sick. The Turkey of Christmas Past is a third-person swordplay oriented. I can't even talk. I'm so excited. Action game about Tom Decatt. What? I thought we were talking about a turkey. With a foul army held bent on destroying Christmas, Thomas or Last and Only Hope? Well, that's a weird way of saying Kevin, but I'm in. I'm here to save you. Here we go. I'm so excited. Why do you think this was so far down the list with only one review? What did the review even say, actually? I forgot to check. What the heart, heart, heart, heart? Four out of four hearts is a pretty good review. I am ready. Continue. Yes, sure. I've not started. Tom, our hero was awoken from his slumber. Tom, you're like the opposite of Instagram versus reality. Your picture didn't do you justice. Wait, what is this? Oh my God. This is terrifying. Oh no, no, no, no, no. Oh my God. Oh my God. They're fricking everywhere. I don't know what I'm doing. I'm really scared. Oh God. Oh God. I can feel another migraine coming on. Stress induced migraine. I feel sick. Oh no. Oh dude. All right. Let's start attacking. Yes. Unguard. Okay. They're actually pretty weak. Oh my God. What are you? This turkey's been given steroids to plump him up. Did he just say your ancestors were dinosaurs? Arise. My ancestors were in the Anderthals. What's that got to do with anything? Oh wait. That kind of stayed the same. Evolution didn't change much in my family. The Anderthal ends the street. I'm dead. That's not how this story ends. Very close to letting it end that way. But let's try once more. Don't forget to stock up on ammo at the magic stones. What does that mean? I don't know what the magic stones are. I don't know where to find them. And I didn't even know I had ammo to begin with or how to use it. So it doesn't really help me. Oh, here we go. I can shoot. Yeah. Why would I bother fecking even fighting when I can just shoot like this? Oh, because yeah, ammo. I forgot. Where are the magic stones? What kind of turkey is this? Like, you'd return this one to the store. If that was the last on the shelf, you know what? I'd rather Christmas just be ruined by not having a turkey. Oh, this could be the magic stones. Oh no, wait, this is the Bible. I can't read. I'm a cat. I forgot it. I think this might be inside the temple that the Santa from the first game was trying to get into. It's all connected. Defeat key holder to open, but I don't understand where are they? I've been running around aimlessly. He's got to be the key holder, surely. He doesn't really do much. Like, he kind of goes for it, but he mainly just misses. How many lives do you have left for lead? What's a for lead? Am I for lead? Birds of a feather flock together. Okay. I love Christmas games. Okay. I cannot defeat him. That's not the story ends. I'm pretty sure it is. Sorry. All right. Now this looks promising. I'm in. All right. Am I just, am I trying to break out? I like your four screens for me as if I could find anyone to play this with me. Oh, very good. I'm out. I'm free. First to 21 wins. I guess that's me. Oh my God. What is this? He's angry. Traffic cone. I just ruined someone's Christmas. There are going to be a lot of traffic accidents because of me. Okay. I found a rocket launcher in this one. Probably best that I ruined this person's Christmas. The door is open. Great. I don't know what I'm meant to be doing. I don't know what they're supposed to be collecting like cool items there, but I threw away my rocket launcher and I swapped it for this burger. Oh, thank goodness. There was no air holes in that thing. All right. Burger was here right under the tree. Have I completed the game yet? Santa's not needed for the rest of the game. I'm not going to do that. Have I completed the game yet? Santa's not needed for the rest of the year, so I guess I'll just die. It's Santa's arrived. Oh God. I'm an imposter run. I'll get the revolver. Hold on. Now all I have to do is kill you and everyone will think I'm the real Santa. Oh God. He's escaped. Why did I announce my plan like a bad Bond villain? You know what? This game seems really good. Like if you had friends to play with. Wow. That would be nice. Now how do I point the gun at myself? Oh, there he goes again. No need. All right. Good game. I rated four out of four hearts also. All right. Now this is what we've been looking for. A bit of Christmas rhythm. Wow. Either this game is actually this deranged or that migraine has done serious damage. Can I go back to not being able to see again? Can I just have blurry vision forever? What? Who am I? Oh, I'm the reindeer in the back. Why am I not Santa? What's wrong with his reindeer? Is Santa trying to catch him? Wait. I'm going right through the candy canes. If I click down and get them. Okay. Great. If I do this. So it looks like there's just two of me. I'm spamming it so much. Then it works. Yeah. That's the strategy. All right. Well, I figured it out, guys. There's your guide for this game, which is called Christmas rhythm on steam. I think I'd only last another 30 seconds before going clinically insane. So let's quit that. Sebastian as a teenager was waiting for his parents to come back home on a cold Christmas night. That sounds fun. You're kind of looking forward to the next day and having Christmas time with your family. Christmas cheer. Come on. Load me in. I want Christmas to be here. Making my own musical here. So excited for the game. Oh, it looks so nice. Is it snowing? Okay. All of a sudden this game is triggering my fight or flight response. This doesn't seem very Christmasy. Check the terrace. I think I'd rather stay here and watch this. What is this? I hope it's the mummy staring Brandon Frazier. This game is making me anxious. This doesn't fill me with Christmas cheer at all. Wait, I'm on the second floor. How did it run by my window? See, nothing is really happening. Like I turned off the hot plate because my parents asked me to. But then in the menu it says caught by enemy. Zero. What does that mean? The deer hates to be ignored. What the hell does that mean? I'm going to call my parents. That's a good idea, dude. I'm thinking of calling my parents. I'm getting anxious. Oh, no. Oh, no. If this is some sort of Christmas prank, I do not appreciate it. Like whatsoever. Okay. Fuses on. The deer always fuses. In fact, in horror games, the elf hates water. What kind of notes are these? Oh, Jesus. Okay. The deer hates to be ignored. So if I look away, the deer chases me if I'm not looking at it. That is really uncomfortable. You don't look so bad. You're not evil or anything, are you? You just like hanging around on the stairs. You better watch out. You better watch out. You better watch out. Oh, God. Why are you standing there, dude? Are you going to leave? You found outside. Maybe you should go. Okay. I see you. Hedging towards me. You creep. The only thing is, if this reindeer is in the house, where's that elf it warned me about? Oh, I found a water gun. No, don't turn that off. Fucking lunatic. It's turning off all the power to... Oh, my God. What is that? Is that the fucking elf? Dude, feck off. Feck off, dude. What the hell is this game? Oh, yeah. Let me just go through our literal maze to get to our gazebo at midnight when there's a reindeer and a magic elf chasing me. All right. I made it to the gazebo. I assume I'm safe forever now, right? You were coming with me, says this note. Oh, God. Who wrote this? Was it the reindeer? I need to talk to my parents about what's happening. I just saw the door close in my house. Do you see that? I saw that. I'll feck off, dude. The thing is, they're the lamest villains ever, but it's just like the uncertainty of what's going on. This whole game makes me uncomfortable. Yeah, right, yeah. Times it now. It's midnight. Well, feck you both. My parents don't believe anything I say. Well, to be fair, I probably wouldn't believe them either. Survive until 2 a.m. is the only objective I have. Frankly, I don't think I want to survive in this world. I want to die. Elf, take me. You've earned it. You've been working hard all year. Now, here's your reward. It's me. Sorry. I know I let down, but at least try and act happy when you open it. Oh, my God. What the hell are you? Are you Santa? Dude, just feckin' take me. You can have me. For feck's sake, feckin' weird game. My game's crampus is home, by the way. The game looked way cooler from the screenshots. Like, look at this. Now, this game was Instagram versus reality. What I expected and what I got. Christmas Rampage. You know what? These games have actually inspired me to go on a Christmas Rampage, so I'm really happy to be here. What is happening? Why am I getting attacked by carrots? I'm dying to carrots. Okay. I feel like I'm dying to carrots. Okay. I figured out how to throw snowballs like a feckin' browning machine gun. You got an item. A snowball. Well, that was a feckin' lame present, and I already have millions of them, apparently. So it's very unnecessary. Why are there bombs here? Are they hurting me? Or am I picking them up? I don't know. I'm just running into them. Why are there so many carrots? Oh, that was broccoli. Is this made for, like, four-year-olds? Like, gross. Carrot and broccoli. Yeah. To be fair, I don't eat carrots or broccoli, so it's just made for six-year-olds and me, and that's it. Give me the knife. I don't even understand what I am. Who created me? Why? For some reason, you can't go through to the next room if you're shooting. It's really weird, but if I stop shooting, I can just... Okay, you just can't go through to the next room sometimes, actually. It's just a feature of the game. Okay, I got through floorboards. I'm disjointed here as well. Oh, I'm on a boss fight against evil turkey. He's launching carrots at me. Funnily enough, he's the same attack as the carrots, so I wonder if they were just too lazy to actually give him a unique attack. I have won, and I am now dancing. You know what? I think I might be a genius, because I was right. I can't stand much of this game. We're gonna end it there. I hope you enjoyed. Merry Christmas, everyone. Sorry for making it worse. Thank you very much for watching. I hope to see you next time. Bye for now. Just use this as the outro music. Thank it.