 Welcome to the second annual Highline College Yale Summit. Yes, my name is Rashad Norris and I'm the director of a community engagement here. So I just really will just say welcome once again. We here put on a summit for African American, Black, Latino, Hispanic, Native American, Pacific Islander, Asian American, Ladies of Color. So that's why you're here this morning. At the same time, we have one for our young men as well. So when I was out doing outreach in the community, I know some of you ladies are like, Rashad, we're gonna get one for us. We're gonna get one for us. So look, this is the second annual. So I'm glad that if this is your first time, you're in for a treat. If this is your second time, you in for double treats. So I'm just glad that you are here. Before we get started, I have to just say, if you could just say thank you to all of the volunteers and the individuals that helped put this on. Plus, you have to say thank you to our catering who fed you this morning, who's gonna feed you lunch later on as well. So you guys give a round of applause for all those individuals. So it's always a treat to have you here. Like I said, I'm about to send this mic over to a young lady that's gonna be our emcee for today. I'm at the ceremony. And this young lady is a powerhouse. She actually is a trustee here on our campus. So that means that she is the president's boss, which is real cool. Real, real cool. She's a local. She lives locally in the area. Her daughters actually go to Mount Rainier, so which is real good. She actually is very well known in America and all across abroad, all the seas. So you actually have a celebrity here that's gonna be speaking with you, which is real cool. If you look in your book, everybody has a booklet here. And you can look up her profile. Miss Dabrina Jackson-Gandy. As you can see, she's been an Oprah's magazine. She's been an Ebony. She's been an Essence. She has been on TV all over. She actually has her own radio. Her radio station that she's actually was on as well, which I had an opportunity to go speak to her, which was real cool. So I would just say, please, please welcome Miss Dabrina Jackson-Gandy with open arms and with love. So ladies, I don't know if you're ready. I don't know if you're ready for what you are about to hear. I don't know. I don't know because Dr. Caprice Hollins has chosen a powerful title. You are brilliant, gorgeous, talented, and fabulous. Did you know that? Okay. So here's what we're gonna do. And I'm gonna say, are you brilliant? And you're gonna say yes. Then I'm gonna say, are you gorgeous? And you're gonna say yes. Then I'm gonna say, are you talented? And you're going to say, and are you fabulous? And you are going to say, young, educated, leading, ladies leading, young, educated, ladies leading, are you brilliant? Young, educated, ladies leading, are you gorgeous? I don't hear are your mouths saying yes. If I see you not saying yes, I'm gonna come tap you to come up here on stage with me and lead this. Let's start it over. Young, educated, ladies leading, are you brilliant? Young, educated, ladies leading, are you gorgeous? Young, educated, ladies leading, are you talented? Young, educated, ladies leading, are you fabulous? That's what I'm talking about. Well, let me introduce you to a fabulous woman who is all of those things, and she has a heart for young, educated, ladies leading. Her name is Dr. Caprice Hollins, who was born and raised right here in Seattle. She received her degree in psychology undergrad from Seattle University and her master's and doctorate degrees in clinical psychology. With an emphasis, check this out in multicultural psychology. That's profound. From California School of Professional Psychology, she has over 15 years experience working with diverse populations, providing mental health services, facilitating workshops, teaching grad courses, and she's an adjunct professor at several local universities and right now she is an associate professor of counseling at the Seattle School of Theology and Psychology. She has held offices with the Seattle Public Schools and she also has a company called Cultures Connecting LLC. She has worked hard to balance professional and family life. She has two children, three step children. Wow, that is so amazing. So would you all give a warm welcome, a yell welcome to Dr. Caprice Hollins. Give her some love. Woo, woo, woo, woo, woo. Good morning. Now I just came from the Bahamas. I just got here to this spot. Went from the airplane home to shower and came here this morning. So I am Ty Yerd. Are you awake? Because I'm going to need your energy to make this a powerful day, a powerful morning. Are you ready? Thank you for that introduction. I'll tell you something. Before I went to graduate school, I went to Dabrina's first book signing. We didn't know each other then and I remember thinking to myself, how does she do it? How did she write her own book? I was just amazed because I saw her as a fabulous, brilliant, talented, gorgeous woman and I thought to myself, I want to be like her when I grow up and here I am in front of you. I didn't always want to tell you something. I did not always see myself where I'm at today and I want to share with you a story about my life and I'm hoping that in some way that my story, some things about my story will connect to your story and share with you what my journey has been like as you think about where you're going. What are you going to do with your life? I remember when I was in fourth grade, my sister died. I have five siblings and my sister died and it was the first time in my life that I had ever met my father. So fourth grade, my sister passes away and my dad comes from Texas and I open the front door, I come home from school and my dad is there. I always knew who he was but I had never met him because he lived in another state and I always struggled and never knew like what am I supposed to be doing in life. I had a younger sister that's about 18 months younger than me and she was always smarter than me, always knew things that I didn't know, always kind of teased me and would say things like you don't know that and I remember being very shy and very timid, I wouldn't go and spend the night at people's houses. I had tutors in school. I remember when I was in high school I didn't know the difference between a country and a state. I was very just introverted, I didn't get in trouble but I just kind of worked my way through so that like where people didn't really notice me. That's what my shyness did. I had this fear that people wouldn't like me and so I was afraid of stepping into my greatness. I'll tell you something else about myself but I'm going to tell you some things and I'm going to be vulnerable and let you know because I want to paint a story for you that who I am today is not who I have always been, right? That people don't just become doctors. They don't just become authors or owners of businesses. There are a lot of challenges and things in life that you will have to overcome and a big part of that is that you're going to have to stay focused and you're going to have to know that there is a greater purpose for you in spite of what your challenges and experiences are in life. Not only was I shy, not only did I have a sister who was smarter than me, when my older sister had passed away, she was only 14 years old. I'm in the fourth grade, she passes away and my mom decides to go and work in Alaska and when she goes she keeps us with our grandparents. We stay with our grandparents and six months out of the year we go and live with our grandparents and then my mom would come home and then we would go and live with our grandparents again. Even in my high school years, my mom still would go to Alaska and my sister and I would live in our home alone. When I was in fourth grade, I think I was just very afraid of the world and I wet the bed. I wet the bed until I was in the sixth grade, something that I don't tell people and I just had a hard time in life. But something, I don't know, something helped me to make it in spite of all of my challenges and I want to tell you today 10 things that I learned along the way, how I got to be where I'm at. But I first want to tell you a little bit about my family background. My four older brothers and sisters are white from my mom's first marriage and my parents, my grandparents on my mother's side disowned her and they disowned her because I was born at a time when interracial marriages and interracial relationships were still illegal in some states, right? And so the thought that a white woman is pregnant by a black man was not okay during that time and my mom didn't marry my father and he left shortly after she became pregnant with me. So my mom created a family for us. All of my aunts and uncles are my mother's best friends, right? My grandparents that I just told you about were a black couple who met my mom when she was pregnant with me and they legally adopted her when my mom was about 42 years old. So my mom's birth certificate, white woman, says that her parents are African-American. So I was just lost. You know, I didn't really, you know, to not have your father, to lose a sister, to have your mom leaving all the time. My sister really struggled with it in that she never graduated from high school. She went on the rebellious kind of side of things. But before I tell you the 10 things I learned along the way, I want to share with you a poem that I wrote to give you a better idea of what my life has been like. I'm going to put a little window into it and then think about what are your challenges and how will you use those challenges that you have in your life or that you're experiencing right now. Raise your hand if you're experiencing challenges. What will you do to turn those challenges into your strengths? What will you do to overcome the obstacles that you're facing right now? I am from an Irish and Scottish world. Translated white who never fully accepted me but never quite rejected me like the way they did my dark skin, sisters. I am from African Queens who took pride in the gaps between their teeth until years of enslavement divided us with, you think you're better than me, don't you? That's where I'm from. I'm from a laid back pool playing absent fatherhood children I've never met and your daddy loves you, honey, he's a good man. I'm from a pimp for a stepdad. Lester Lee Wingate III. But there were still fun times in Kachakan and Valdez and hey, we got a new baby sister now. That's where I'm from. I'm from a mother who made as a family when her own turned the other way who loved me with all her being who believed that I was beautiful whose eyes would beam with pride at every step I would take who would take away all my pain if she could. You have the world to fight, don't fight one another, shotgun in her hand if anyone was to ever try to hurt one of her babies and don't judge one another kind of mother. That's where I'm from. I'm from Marin and George's Barbecue and Catering on 23rd and Judkins, grandparents who found the blessing of being grandparents in me, piled high on their bed watching old black and white seein' white dressed as Chinese and Indians playing penny ante poker, homemade potato chips, costumes, jams and jellies and a kitchen that always smelled oh, so good. Everything from scratch except for the closet full of toilet paper and paper towels because you just never know and how come you don't have more black friends, honey? That's where I'm from. I'm from Myrtle Creek, Oregon, white grandparents who were ashamed of the color of my skin hearing taunts of nigger go home where teachers pretended they didn't hear and a white grandmother who believed if she told me to just ignore it that I actually could. Can't wait to go home because names do hurt me. I'm from Gumbo, Oxtail Stew, Collard Greens, Mahalia Jackson on Cleanup Sundays. Michael Jackson, enjoy yourself, step into the groove and doin' the bump if you can. I'm from Summer Trips to the Oregon Coast to visit Father Timmy and Uncle Billy and Mommy, who's Jim Crow? Whistle while you work, Nixon is a... You kids, knock that! I'm from Coopville, Washington, loving summer life on the farm until what's that you're putting in your hair and you must be good at basketball? I don't need to ask you why you won't ask me to dance. I already know because you nicknamed me Shadow and played games called Nigger Knocking and then said you were sorry that you wanted to invite me to your sleepover, but couldn't. I'm from a family who loves me, but a world that still judges me because of the color of my skin. Where are you from? Thank you. So here I am, just coming off of an airplane to be with you, a trip to Bahamas, never thought I would do that. Our family vacations were in a station wagon going to the Oregon Coast. That was the extent of it, or maybe going fishing. And so to imagine myself one day being here on a stage talking to over 200 young, beautiful, gorgeous, talented, brilliant women was only something that I could dream about. So how did I get here? There's some things that I learned along the way and I hope that they'll have some meaning for you. How did I get here? What is it that when I look back and think about what's the difference between me and maybe somebody else who had even worse circumstances that I've come from and didn't make it, so to speak? One of the things my foster brother told me, he said, Caprice, he said, find what makes your heart sing. Don't look for what will make you the most money or what will bring you the most popularity or what might look good to other people. I remember working at African American Academy and I talked with young black youth like yourself and I'd say, what do you want to be when you grow up? And they would say basketball player or a petition or sometimes they'd say a lawyer and I'd say, well, what makes you want to be a lawyer? And they'd say, well, my mom says that I argue a lot. Those aren't good reasons to want to become something. You have to figure out what brings you alive? What makes your heart sing? If you look deep in yourself and say, what am I good at? What would bring me joy? I remember I wanted to be a model but the only reason I wanted to be a model was because nobody ever told me that I was smart. People would say, oh, you're cute or oh, you dress nice. I went to the modeling agency and they said, you're too short. You have a gap between your teeth, right? And your face is too round. Now, if I really, really wanted to be a model, I would have found a way around that. But the truth of the matter was it wasn't what made my heart sing. And I spent time journaling and thinking and reflecting and I thought to myself, I want to do something where I can help people, where I can support them that way. No matter what struggles that they're facing, that they would have someone to lean on, someone to talk to and find and share what their problems are. And so I started out at a community college because see what you have to remember is that when I graduated from high school, as I said earlier, I didn't know the difference between a country and a state. I spent my time trying to figure out what was the best color lipstick that would look good on me or what clothes to wear, right? And so when I went to community college, I had to take classes like English and math that weren't college level starting all over again, starting from the beginning. But see, I wanted something more. By that time, I wanted something more than I had wanted in high school. See, I didn't have conferences like Yale encouraging me, right? I didn't have role models around saying to me that you can do it. And so I started on this journey and once I got my A degree, I thought, you know what, that wasn't so bad. Let me try my bachelor's degree. And then when I tried my bachelor's degree, I said, well, you know what, I wonder about this doctorate degree thing, right? And before I knew it, I was in LA getting a doctorate degree. Now, here was the thing about being in LA getting my degree. I at this point had known intellectually that it was something that I was going to accomplish, right? I'm already in graduate school. But it wasn't until I met my college professor, Dr. Shelley Hurrell, an African-American woman that I realized for the first time that I was actually going to do this. See, what happened was one day I was in class and Dr. Hurrell was a young woman. She was pregnant, getting ready to have her first child. And there was a white woman in class with me. And we're studying race issues. And I remember this white woman saying, when Dr. Hurrell had a substitute in the class, I remember this white woman saying, when are we going to move on? She was tired of talking about race. When are we going to move on? Now, she was rich. I remember she was very wealthy. Her father was like some kind of orchestra person. I don't even know what the name of it is, right? And I got so angry. I said, move on! Move on! Wouldn't it be nice if we could all just move on? And see, I'm probably in my mid-20s or so, and I remember thinking to myself, I'm going to tell Dr. Hurrell that this student doesn't really want to be here. I go knocking on my professor's door, and she opens the door, and I just latch on to her and I start weeping. I literally, like that gut, you know, that gut weeping, that one that you don't even know where all that pain comes from. And I realized in that moment that I wasn't there to tell on this other student, right? I'm a grown woman, right? I'm really there because I just wanted to be near this professor because for the first time in my life, I realized that I'm going to be that too. It was the first time in my life that I had ever seen someone who looked like me doing the very thing that I hoped to one day become, right? Role models, people in your life that encourage you, that even just by their presence, reminds you that you can be anything that you want to be in the world is important, right? Did you know that you are the average of the five people you hang around with the most? You are the average of the five people you hang out with the most. So look around you, see who you're hanging out with, right? When people, see right now, my best friend is smarter than me. And why do I have a best friend that's smarter than me? I have to ask her every time we have a conversation, what does that word mean? Because I am stretching myself to be better than I am today. So one of the things is to find role models. The other thing is to be around people who are doing better than you, who want something more for their lives. In middle school, going into high school, my best friend was my cousin and another young lady, and I remember they used to steal, right? They used to steal. We'd go downtown and they would take things from the store. And I didn't know this because they knew that if I knew that I wouldn't hang out with them. And one day we're in the elevator and they're talking with one another and something comes up where I realize that they have stolen. And I decide on that day that I can't hang out with them anymore. And see, even in middle school, even though I knew, didn't know what I wanted to be, I knew that I didn't want to be that. I knew that I didn't want to be that. And so when you think about the people that you're hanging around with, think about are they encouraging you? Are they making you a better person? Or are they pulling you down? You see, I believe in the saying that hurt people hurt people. And when we're hurting in life, we like other people to hurt with us, right? There's something about that that makes us feel better when other people around us are not doing well, right? Another thing that I learned along the way is don't ever give up. I struggled and I struggled in school through high school. I struggled in college, but I never gave up. Even when I took my license exam as a psychologist when you graduate, you still cannot call yourself a psychologist until you take a license exam. And you purchase these books that stand about this tall from this podium. And you will be tested on it. It costs you about $500 to take this test. And if you fail it, you have to wait another six months. And I took the test and I failed it. And I took the test, again, I thought to myself, okay, well, maybe I need to study with someone. So I took the test again, studying with someone, and I failed it, right? And the third time I said, you know, this can't happen again. And I got a bigger study group together. And I took that test a third time and I passed it. Because one of the things that I learned about myself and I learned about people is that there are different kinds of intelligence, right? There's multiple types of intelligence. And by taking a test, that's just one... If you take a test and you pass it with flying colors, that's one kind of intelligence, right? The second part of this license exam is that you have to be interviewed by about eight psychologists, right? And they ask you, they throw all these questions out. And I'm ready for that one, right? Because I love to talk. You don't know that about me, but I love to talk. I'm in the center of attention, right? And I love talking. And I know that I know what I know. I just don't know how to tell you that I know it when I'm taking a written exam. But I know how to tell it to you. And I passed that test with flying colors, right? I had a college professor at Shoreline Community College that says, you know what, it's great if you can get straight A's, but what I really want to know is can you dance? See, what he was saying is that it's important to be well-rounded, to not just know how to do one thing, but to know how to do multiple things. And I'm going to tell you something. I can dance. In fact, I can get down. I can jam, right? I may not be a straight A student, right? So don't give up. The other thing is that I learned was to step into the world unapologetically. Now, this one was a tough one for me. Are you with me on this? Are you with me? You got your phones out? Am I boring you? Are you with me? You're with me? Okay. To step into the world unapologetically. See, when I was shy, if I said something that offended you, or if I did something wrong, I would say, I'm sorry. And you would say, that's okay. And I would say, I'm sorry. And then my friend would say, stop saying you're sorry. I'm sorry. I would say, right? And I started saying to myself, I started reading books. When I say no, I feel guilty. I felt guilty to tell someone no. But I started to really work on myself. On my self-esteem and my self-worth. And I used to have this little saying. I didn't tell this to anyone. I had this little saying. And I would say, this is my world too. This is my world too. That it wasn't just about me making space for other people in the world, which was all that I did up to this point. I had to learn to make space for myself as well. And so to step into the world unapologetically means to love yourself, right? I have learned that I love me some Dr. Hollins. I do. I love me some Dr. Hollins, right? And I don't apologize about that. And I remember just when I came in, and I was seeing Dabrina, and I'm giving her a compliment, she reminded me of what it means to step into this world unapologetically. When someone tells you that your outfit looks nice or that you look pretty today, you say thank you. I worked hard at this. It does look good, doesn't it? Or I do look good, don't I? Right? Rather than how I used to be where if someone gave me a compliment or said something nice to me, that what my role was was to tell them that no, this isn't true of me. Do you know what I'm talking about? Right? It's like I worked hard. I worked. I ran home. I drove home quick today. And I got in the shower and I ran here putting on my best clothes for you today. And if you told me I look good, why would I tell you no I don't? Right? Thank you very much. Yes, I do look good. And I worked hard to look good today. Right? That sometimes if we wait for other people to lift us up, we will be waiting a long time. Right? We will be waiting a long time. I worked hard to get my doctorate degree. You are working hard to get through school. And when someone tells you good job, you tell them thank you. And in some way, shape or form, even if it's to yourself, say yeah, I know I do look good today, don't I? Right? Or I did do good on that exam. Make sense? Unapologetically. Turn to your neighbor and say, dang, I look good today. Right? Here's the other thing that I learned. Here's the other thing that I learned. That it's okay to want to be liked. Because see, that was part of my problem. Was that I wanted to be liked. Okay? The problem with wanting to be liked is when you let your desire to be liked inform the way you interact in the world. Right? We all, every single person in this room, every woman in this room wants to be liked. Sometimes we say, oh, I don't care if other people like me. Yes, you do. You care. Right? Other people in our lives matter. The problem is when it matters to you so much that how you behave, the choices that you make, the decisions that inform you when you step out into the world that your need to be liked determines how you behave. That's when it becomes a problem. Because then you're doing things for everyone else and not for yourself. Okay? And when you're doing things for everyone else and not for yourself, you don't know what problems, what pains, what struggles or challenges that person is having that's informing them and the way they're interacting in the world. If you know what your values are, if you know what your beliefs are and you hang on to those and stick with those, you will do well in life. I remember there was a kid in my school, I won't say his full name, but let's just say his name is Dennis. And I remember he used to get teased. All the kids, a lot of the kids at school would tease him. And I didn't tease him. I was not a person who would tease or who would pick on other people. Okay? But there can be pressure when one kid is not liked by other kids to be like the other kids and treat that kid ill. Right? In my 20-year school reunion, high school reunion, I'm opening up this door to go into the building where the reunion is at. And there's a, it's one of those one-way kind of doors where you can see yourself and you can see how good you look as you get ready to walk into that, right? But I can see behind me Dennis. And Dennis comes up to me and he says, Caprice, I've been, I was hoping that you would be here. I was telling my wife that you were one of the few people who didn't pick on me in elementary school. Right? He had remembered that from elementary school. I go back to my 30-year reunion and I'm looking for him. And I ask people, has anybody seen Dennis? And they said, oh, Dennis passed away. Yeah. And I felt good that while he was on this earth that I didn't treat him in the way that other people treated him just so that I would be accepted. See, that's having core values, values that in spite of what everybody else is pressuring you to do or they're pressuring you to behave. Even if it's not spoken, you can still feel those pressures that you know the difference between right and wrong and that you live by those values. Make sense? You don't hear me? You hear me? All right, all right. Treating other people the way that you want to be treated or treating other people the way that they want to be treated. In all of this, I'll tell you there have been moments where even still in my life I get knocked down, right? Because it's hard to have accomplished so much and to stay humble and to remember that even while I'm saying, wow, Dr. Holland, you did a great job or you've really done something with your life, always reminded that I'm not who I am today just because I'm great. I am who I am today because of the people in my life that were there for me or the role models or the people that came before me, even my ancestors that I didn't know that made it possible for me to be where I'm at today. And so just remembering that you are all that and you're not, right? That whatever it is that you become in life it's really not about you. It's really not. It's about what you can do to contribute to the world to make it a better place. And there is a plan for you even with all the struggles and the challenges that you are facing there is a purpose in even that because it will make you stronger if you can overcome it. Right? It will make you stronger and it will help you to understand what other people are going through so that you can reach down and help people up. Right? I'm going to share a poem and then I'm going to see if you have any thoughts or questions that you have of me and then we'll just have some conversation. I used to keep this poem on my desk all through undergraduate school and graduate school because I was constantly again struggling with this notion of just kind of stepping into the world unapologetically. I read it for his inauguration speech but it was written by a woman named Marion Williamson. She says, our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous? Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. You're playing small, does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine as children do. We were born to manifest the glory of God that is within us. And even if you don't have a belief in God if you don't have a belief in a higher power, still know that you have a purpose in life. It's not just in some of us, it's in all of you. As we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. What they're saying there is what she's saying is when you magnify your brilliance and your talent you're giving other people the permission to step into theirs. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others. Thank you for your time today. So could we please stand to our feet, stand to our feet, stand to our feet, stand to our feet. And give Dr. Caprice Collins a hand.