 The narcissist thinks you still want them. Yes, you hear that right. As hard as it may be for you to believe, they actually think that you still want them. And of course, many of you, you don't want them. If you receive a message or a phone call from them, you feel sick to your stomach. It makes you want to run away. You don't want to be around them. You don't want to be around that negative energy. After everything that they did to you, they put you through hell. They did all of these things to intentionally and deliberately harm you. So of course you don't want anything to do with them after that. When someone harms you deliberately and they see the effects that it's having on you, and they continue to do it, then after some time you develop the awareness, you realize what they're trying to do. You realize that they're trying to harm you and they have no mercy on you. When you realize that, this is when your brain tells you that you need to run away. You need to get away from them because they're only going to continue to harm you. And you become aware that, yes, while they may display illusions and give you little bits of what you want to see, they're always going to go back to who they are, which is an abuser. They're people who abuse, people who harm. And if you don't want to be around that, because after some time you begin to realize your worth, you begin to value yourself, and you realize that you are not deserving of that type of treatment. You have value to bring to the world, and you are a responsible, accountable person. You are a productive member of society, and you are a person who realizes that they deserve better treatment, they do not deserve to be abused. But this is where we get into the problem though, because narcissists, as I've said many times before in my videos, they do not self-reflect. So you look at them, and you see this crazy person, and many of you may have taken videos of them when they were attacking you, when they were abusing you. And you look back at these things, and you know exactly who they are. This monster, this person who constantly attacks you, they put you down, they abuse you, and they don't take any responsibility for it, instead they blame you for your reaction to it. After they've pushed your buttons. So you see them exactly as they are, because you remember back all of the things that they've done to you. But because they don't self-reflect, and because they lack self-awareness, they're not seeing themselves in that way. They're not seeing themselves in the way that you do. And just to show you how crazy they are, the absurdity of it, I've experienced this myself so many times. A narcissist could go and punch you in the face, and then to defend yourself you might push them away, and they'll just completely forget about what they did to entice you, and instead they will focus on your reaction. And yet at the same time, they could bring up something that you did from 10 years ago, and make it as though it's relevant today. But then if you try to bring up something from 10 seconds ago, they would just brush it aside, or they would just completely deny it. Just to show you how crazy they are, and it should help you to understand how they can still think that you want them, despite everything that they have done to you. Because they are borderline crazy, they are delusional, they're arrogant, and they are very entitled. They believe that if they want something, they should have it without doing the work, without having to treat you right or treat you with respect. They just see it as an object, and just because they want you, they believe that they should have you. They don't believe that they should have to treat you right, because remember it's all about them, and what they want. You're supposed to do things for them, and they can abuse you, they can toss you aside, they can do whatever they want, and they shouldn't have to answer for that. Because in their minds, they are the ultimate authority, and you are there supporting it, so you answer to them, not the other way around. They're meant to be the ones who have power over you, and they tell you what to do. And for these reasons, yes, they think that you still want them. I don't know. I know it may make you sick just to even to fathom that in your mind, to think that this person, after everything they did to you, they actually think that you still want them. It's crazy, because they think that you're so brainwashed, and they're looking at it from their past successes, where they have managed to manipulate people, and to stay in with them, and doing all these things to them, and still making them think that they are the problem, because they've been successful at that in the past, that they've got all of these enablers, all of these people who support them. They're looking at it like, I can do whatever I want, and you'll still accept me. You'll still want me back. You'll still want me. It's how they think in their minds. They're crazy. They really are. They really believe that they can do whatever they want to you, and you will just forget about it. And that is actually exactly what they want you to do. They want you to make it easy for them, so that they can do whatever they want, and have whatever they want with you. And they'll never have to answer for anything. Yeah, that's exactly what they want to see, because remember, it's all about them. It's all about them getting what they want at your expense. And, yeah, you will see a lot of controlling behaviour. They're constantly trying to control your perception. They're constantly trying to entice you. They're constantly trying to pull you into something. Because of course, when you're constantly getting straight into them, but you're not wanting to deal with them anymore, that's destroying their reality, their illusion. That's breaking that apart. And narcissists don't think or act like normal people. So when you do something that threatens the illusion, they don't look at it like that. Maybe I got it wrong. Maybe this is just some fantasy I made in my mind, and you don't really want me. No, what they do is, they try to continue the illusion at all costs. When you threaten the illusion, they feel insecure, and when they feel insecure, they try to regain that security within themselves, that stability, and they do that by trying to control you, by trying to control your perception of them, by trying to make you want them again. And they'll do that by trying to get you to forget about all of the abuse, all of the things that they did to you. They may return to the love-bombing phase, and yeah, they'll try and pull you back in. They'll try to tempt you by posting pictures, whatever it is on social media. They may even come back, give you flowers, chocolates, whatever it is, to try and change your perception of them, to try to make you want them again. They may try to mirror your ideals, your interests. They may try and do all of these things because they want you to want them. That's what they want, and they're going to do whatever it takes to get that. They don't care about reality, they don't care about the truth, they don't care that you don't actually want them. They're not even thinking like that. Because for the illusion to continue, and for their false self to exist, they have to have this arrogance and entitlement, they have to believe that no matter what, you must want them regardless of what they've done to you. And I'll be honest, at times it can be very powerful when a person is so sure of themselves, so confident. I will admit that it has worked on me in the past, where I have been abused, I've been manipulated. And despite that, I've still taken people back because they've brought back this illusion, the love-bombing. And they tricked me. And I know that's probably happened to you as well, because I know that on average victims leave, the narcissist will get discarded around seven times before it's finally over, despite everything that was done to them. That's how powerful the liberation can be. And it also depends on how susceptible you are to it. So you need to focus on finding your own power within yourself. You need to remind yourself of what it is that you actually want for real, because this is the problem. When you get involved with the narcissist, all of that goes out the window. You forget about everything that you want, and you take on their ideals. You become who they want you to be, and you start chasing what they want you to chase, even though it's not even what you're about. But they fed this to you, they drilled it inside your mind, and yeah, then you go look for it. And it's all because they still think that you want them, they have to think that you still want them. That's the only way that their reality can make any sense. If you don't want them, what are they supposed to do? All of this time they've invested into you, they just forget about all of that, then they've got nothing to do. It destroys their ego, they feel unimportant, irrelevant. So that's the last thing they're going to do, is think that you don't want them. That doesn't serve them in any way. It gives them a purpose, it's a reason for them to get up in the morning and check their phones, see if they've got a text from you, see what they're going to do to try and get you back. That gives them a purpose, and they've got nothing else to do with their lives. So they need to have something to do, they need to have a reason, a motivation, and they get that by drilling this belief in their own minds that you still want them, even though that may not be the case. Because in a lot of situations, of course it gets to a point where a victim can just not lie to themselves anymore. I mean, there's just so many acts of abuse in these relationships that just piles up month after month, year after year, to the point where it just becomes indeniable. It's like, what do you expect me to think or to believe? At some point I can only see you as you actually are rather than who you want me to think that you are. Because of the endless acts of abuse, recklessness and carelessness, I mean, it is clear that they do lack discipline. They have an inability to control themselves and their actions, they're very impulsive. And that's why they depend so heavily on the illusion. And the illusion is pretty much just forget about everything I've shown you, forget about everything I've done, and just take me as I am today, even though I have no intentions of changing or being anything better. I mean, of course, I understand people make mistakes, people do things wrong in the past, and sometimes it is time to leave the past in the past so that people can change me better. Of course, I understand that when they do that with no intentions of changing anything. And it's only a matter of time until they show their face again and you see them for who they actually are underneath the mask. So that's a completely different situation altogether. I mean, fair enough, if someone is actually the real, they are thinking about changing and being better and you see that they're taking action, I can understand that. But with narcissists they come back with these false apologies, fake epiphanies, and all these promises of changing and building a future with you and being better. When they know fully well, they're not going to change anything. They're going to be exactly the same because they're quite comfortable with it. They're quite comfortable with acting that way, the preferred dysfunctionality. So they have no intentions of changing anything. They're going to remain exactly the same. They don't see a problem with it. But they know that you do. Yes, they are aware. They do know what you want. That's how they're able to shape shift and change to match your ideals. They may not know what an empath is, but they know that you possess those traits. They know that you are a good person. They know that you care. Of course they know that. Just look back, you can see that they used those traits that they saw as weaknesses. They used them against you. They used that to get and save your mind. So of course they are aware of that. And that is why they come back and they act like these saints, like these performed people who understand, they know they did some things wrong. But now they're trying. They want to make things different. They wouldn't be able to think that way if they didn't know that something was wrong for you. It's not wrong for them, but they know it's wrong for you. So they wouldn't be able to do that. They wouldn't be able to process that in their minds if they weren't aware of your true character. All of these things, everything that is good about you, everything that is positive, they are not trying to use that to create a better situation because that doesn't serve them. All they care about is their ego, their emotions and their needs. So they're only going to use these positive qualities about you as a weapon to destroy you. That's all they're going to do. They don't value these positive things about you. They don't care about that or doesn't benefit them in any way other than if they can use it to hurt you. But yes, they are aware that you care. They are aware that you're a good person. There is no question about it. That is indeniable. I can guarantee it that is a fact and that is actually potentially the number one reason why they're trying to do in the first place is because I see this pattern all the time with all of my clients. The number one thing is that people care. I mean, this is common sense. Just think about it. All of these people who watch these videos the number one trait is that they care. It matters to them. If it didn't, they would never have found my videos in the first place. So that's how you already know that it's pretty much the number one reason why they're trying to do in the first place. It's what made you a suitable victim because how can you be victimized if you don't even give a shit in the first place? You can't. How can you victimize someone who doesn't care? That would never work. But yet they trick themselves in their minds and they twist it as though you caring means that you still want them as though you care about them. Which of course many of us do. Yes, we do care about other people and we want other people to be better but they have no intentions of being better or changing. That was never the plan for them. The plan for them was to manipulate and control you. Dominate you and keep you as their puppet so they can pull the strings whenever they want to. That's all they're trying to do, that she can power and control. Everything they do, everything you see from them is power and control. That's all it is. It has no other meaning. You're taking it as something else. You're looking at it like, oh, maybe they do care. Maybe they do see things the way that I do. Maybe they do want to change. Maybe they do want to be better. No, you're wrong again. It's just another act of gaining power and control over game. That's all that it is because they know what you want. They know what you want to see. Guess what they in about any of that? For real. They're not about any of that for real. No matter how much you wish that they were. And yes, they know that you want to see that. They know that that is what you want to see. You want to see change. You want to see things getting better. Yes, they know that and they use that against you. They see that as a weakness and they use it so that they can customize their own weapon to destroy you. That's all that it is. Because remember they're always watching you. They're studying you. They're stalking you. Not only on social media but sometimes in person as well. Because they want to see what do you want. And then I'll be that. I'll mirror your interests and ideals even though I know that I'm not even about that for real. I'll just reflect that back to you to make you think that I'm about that so that I can gain power and control over game. And by being aware of that you should know that they are completely fake because as soon as you do that as soon as you are thinking in that way where you are studying someone and you're trying to get inside their mind and you're trying to think what do you want? You're not thinking about what do I want. What do you want? And then you're trying to shapeshift and mold yourself into being what they want instead of what resonates with you. As soon as you do that you know you are dealing with a predator. That's what you're dealing with. Someone who they're making you believe that they're about something for real and they want to change, they want to be better but they're just fooling you. They're tricking you. Because that's how they get you in. That's how they gain access to you. That's how they get close to you and that is by giving you a little bit of thought or at least what they think you want to see. Now they've got your attention, they've got you to notice. Now you're investing your time, energy, money, whatever it is and then that's where they've got you just where they want you now they can control you. So yeah, knowing that you should know by now that it is all a game. And that's the problem as well because I think it's so seriously. You show them your love and passion you show them that you care and that's when you lose all of your power as soon as you start caring you lose it all because guess what? They don't care. All of these things that they act like they care about they actually don't give a shit but you do and that's how you're always every time you're in a position of weakness you feel drained and lifeless because when you show genuine care and passion for something you're investing all of your time and energy into it and all of that is just going into a void because they don't feel the way that you do they're not on the same page as you. So as I've said before the person who cares the least in a relationship has the power they've got the most power in that situation the power to control you and they control you through your mind they make you invest more of your time and energy into something that isn't going anywhere anyway but you don't know that and that's how you always lose because you don't recognise that everything you're investing into them isn't going anywhere. You think that it is going somewhere good you think that you're doing something productive but you're not because they don't think the same way that you do they don't think like that they're not thinking okay how can we make things better here? how can we work together and build something for real something that's going to benefit us and maybe even the people around us something sustainable for the future no narcissist things like that they don't think about a mutual goal or objective it's all about themselves I need you to be aware of that I need you to know that because when you know that that is when you can break the cycle the problem is and this is one of the main issues for all of you when you get involved with these people you take them seriously everything they're telling you everything they're showing you you think it out they really mean business they're really about this for real no they're not it's all an act the only person who actually cares is you they don't care at all and you should know that by now if you observe their actions the amount of time you've been with them you should know when someone's words do not match their actions that should tell you everything that you need to know because if they care about all of these things so much then why isn't their time going to that why are they so heavily focused on controlling you of course they try to twist it and act like it's because you're the problem and they need to take control of you because you're bad or something is wrong with you but if you look back you will find before you got involved with them it's only after that that things started going down you were fine before that but that is typically the role that they try to play it's as though you're not right so they have to be around you they have to try to control you and they're just trying to help you it's amazing how they can twist it and justify it in their minds as though abuse is somehow a helpful thing harming someone and yet if you were to do that same thing to them then it would be wrong then it would be wrong this is how narcissists think it's how every abuser thinks they are always the exception and this is literally how they think in their heads in their heads yes they know the difference between right and wrong they do and yeah if someone else was to do that or if you did that to me that would be wrong but if I do it it's okay because I have a reason it's justified something happened to me it's unfair you did something to me so I can do this that's how they think that is how they think as crazy as that sounds that is how they think and that is what causes the toxic situation to continue because it's pretty much just this person who lacks self-awareness they don't self-reflect and everything's just going outwards it's very predatory very impulsive where it's just like I have to do this to you to make myself feel good and although it may be wrong for someone else these feelings, these sensations it overrides anything, any morals the feelings come first before the morals with them and that's why there's nothing inside of them that stops them so yeah, despite everything despite everything they have done to you they will still think that you want them they will still think that it's crazy as that sounds and it's because mainly because of the false character remember they wear a mask they hide this true version of themselves deep inside of them and it's only the closest people to them who get to see that get to see who they actually are and if that's you then yes you would have seen that by now and you will be aware that people outside of the home they don't actually see that true person and what they're actually like but you do see that and when you're not around them to gain a position with you to connect back to you yes they have to present that false character again I mean of course if you've seen this character you've seen the true self before they're not just going to come at you again unless they can trap you and they know you're not going anywhere but if you're somewhere else in the mines and you're trying to move in a different direction all they can do is come back with the false character and make you believe that they're about something that's all that they can do at that point and they know they have this game plan so they know what they have to do at certain points they know that if you're in a position where they can't trap you or they can't gain control over you their only option is to bring back the false character and try to groom you to try to get you to believe in them again but what they're actually doing when they do that they're just preparing you for even more abuse because that's all it's going to lead to when they bring back the false character things that they think you might want to see the illusion that's just to prepare you for even more abuse they're not thinking in their minds of a good future and trying to lead it into something good losses don't think that way it's only ever going to lead to more abuse that's only ever what it's going to be and yet they will come back and try to tempt and entice you by making you believe that they're on the same page as you they want the same things but in actuality they don't want that at all they don't even think about that only as much as if it's what you want or if they think that it's what you want then yes they will give you that they'll give you that illusion just to pull you back in but then once they've got you they're going to switch it up on you just like they always do just like they always do and that's never going to change they're always going to be like that like I've said before the best you'll ever get from them is an illusion that's all it's ever going to be it's never going to be anything else yeah they can make you think they've changed they can make you think that yes I can become a productive member of society I can become a good person I can become someone who will be there for you who will care about you no no they can't do any of that they can't do any of that for real they can make it seem very believable they can but even then it's only for a short period of time it's never going to be consistent it's never going to be something where they're doing it every day and you're going to be with them in a relationship for many years but it remains unchanged it's never going to be like that never you're never going to see that from them as I've said before last says they're only good for one night stands a weekend anything long term it's going to fall apart they cannot sustain success in anything over a long period of time unless they have an enabler a doormat, a fool someone who makes the behaviour possible and most of the time that's probably you the person who is watching my videos right now and that's why I'm trying to wake you up to that you don't have to keep going through that because I know what it's like and I know that you deserve better than being someone's doormat someone's fool someone's emotional punching bag you deserve better than that we all do and I know what it's like of me and myself I've been through all of these things in my own experience and I wouldn't wish it on my worst enemy I wouldn't because no one deserves to be abused no one deserves to be locked in a situation that is outside of their control which they did not consent to I mean fair enough if you want to be a part of something but when it's something that's abusive we have to look at it we have to see it in a different light because why would someone consent to abuse in the first place obviously that must mean that you were manipulated, brainwashed your standards were brought down to that you began to see that as normal when it's not you deserve better than that but that's what they do, that's how they lock you in by targeting your self-esteem bringing you down making you think that yes I am deserving of this but you're not you're deserving of so much more than that and yeah as I've said before it all starts by you realizing your own worth because when you do that you're going to start to look at things differently you're going to start to see and think is this going to be useful for me for a practical purpose is the reward really worth the risk that's how you're going to think when you start to realize your worth if you haven't already done that you're going to start to think do I deserve more than this and you're going to look at yourself everything you've been through in your life all of the suffering, all of the pain the fortune everything that you've lost everything that you've gained as well everything that you've worked for you're going to look at all of these things and you're going to think was all of this worth it just for this was all of it worth it just for that just so I can be around someone who is manipulating me and they're not actually about anything for real if they were then maybe I might consider it but I already know that they're not so why should I even waste my time and that's how you're going to think that's exactly how you're going to think because if you are a person who really values themselves and you realize your worth you're going to look at it like I do deserve something real and not only that but I deserve something long term because I have something to bring to that I have something to invest so you should too and if you're not about that then you should take off find someone else and that's exactly how you should think and I know many of you you've been brought down to such a level over a long period of time where you have forgotten your worth you have forgotten who you are as a person and what you wanted all along you've forgotten all of that and that's why I make these videos it's intended to wake you up to realize that you are so much more than what you were meant to believe see as you were attracted to a brain wash you were brought down and now is the time to come back up and you do that by realizing who you actually are by realizing your worth and that's something I want for all of you because that's the only way that they can get you they have to get you by but they can't really do that unless they have control of you first they have to kind of call you before they can bring your value down because otherwise they already know you just walk away if they come at you and just try to value you right off the bat you're just going to walk away forget them you don't need them that's why they have to come in first and they idealize you they act like they can see everything that you are they recognize just how amazing you are as a person and that pulls you in because of course yes if you've worked very hard in your life you are looking for someone who is on the same page someone who can value you appreciate you yes you are looking for that but then they already know who has worked hard all of their life to become the person that you are today they already know that once you know what they're about you're not going to stick around for long you're going to be out there in no time of course they know that and that's why they have to trick you they have to keep you down because then they can control you they can stop you from leaving that's what they have to do when they are around a powerful person a person who knows their worth they have to they have to control you it's the only way because otherwise you are just going to get up and leave and then they are going to be left alone to their own devices and they don't want that because then they are forced to look at themselves and the monsters that they have become they can create the illusion when you are around when you are there to validate it but once you take you out of the picture it all falls apart that's why they are so controlling so possessive that's why the last thing they want is for you to leave because then they are going to feel like shit they have to look back see everything they did to you and once you move on and become a better person no they don't want that to happen they rather just live in this fantasy where it's you that's the problem and there's nothing wrong with them that's what they would prefer and of course that is the reason why they genuinely don't want anything to be better because if anything was better that would destroy the illusion then they'd have to take some of their accountability because there's all of these things wrong with them and they wouldn't know where to start when you've covered things up your entire life you have to remember that Narcissus they are not like us we're very honest trustworthy people we wear our hearts on our sleeves we say things as they actually are we are very open and direct Narcissus they do tend to be more covert a lot of them they hide the things they do they sweep it under the rug they cover it up they've got a lot of skeletons in their closet and you should already know a person who is hiding all of these things over so many years when they're doing that they clearly have no intention of changing anything or of being better they have no intention of doing that if they're hiding things I mean a person who comes out in the open and they're like yes okay I made a few mistakes this is what I did and I'm trying to change I'm trying to be better here a person like that you can work with them yes if something could happen with them they have some potential because they're rolling up to it they're taking some accountability they're not just trying to hide it but someone who just covers it up and they're like no no no I didn't do that I'm not a part of that a person like that they're going to be the exact same way until the day they die I can promise you that they will because you can clearly see it's in their intention they have no intention of changing a person who does they're going to be trying they're going to be doing certain things they're going to be moving in a certain direction they're going to be taking action they're not just going to be speaking words so that's how you know the difference and I want you all to see that the difference in different types of people narcissists and how they clearly have no intention of changing anything it's all just delusion of fantasy believing that you still want them after everything they've done to you because they're expecting you to be susceptible to their manipulation that's all it is that's all it's ever going to be is manipulation I need you to remember that as well but it's all that it's ever going to be it's not ever going to be anything more than that because deep down they already know they're not going to be good enough for you they're not going to be what you really want they're not going to be able to sustain the illusion of a long period of time they already know that you want something real and they know that they're fake yes deep down they are aware of that they do know that they are fake and manipulative they are aware of that and yeah so by default all they can do is trick you all they can do is make you believe that they're about something else but all they're about is just using you and harming you and there is nothing more to it than that they're only intended to use you for their own needs their own benefit and you just need to look at it for what it is as it actually is you need to develop the awareness and see them as what is this person trying to achieve what are they trying to do and when you look at it like that you will be able to identify the difference between a person who is genuine and they are actually thinking about the future and trying to build something with you are then a person who is just clearly just trying to trick you they're trying to they're trying to lure you down the wrong path and that's what I want you to do I want you to see the difference between someone who is real and someone who is not because as I've said before it's a person who is fake really they just they lack the self-awareness the introspection they don't self-reflect it's more about just you what you're meant to have done and how you need to be better how you're not good enough if you see it it's never about them I mean they might use it as this this false epiphany this way of trying to come back to you but it's never it's never about them genuinely making a difference and over a long period of time it's never about that when you really recognize that you will see that there is no future with them you will see that and then it will make it that much easier for you to pull back because many of you you are you're taking it as though it is real because you want to believe in it if you want to believe that it is real you want them to be different you want them to change if you do need to recognize that they're not really about that for real as I've said the way that you do that is by the lack of accountability and self-reflection because for someone to really have a plan and to be moving in a certain direction you must first be checking in with yourself what your objectives are and your reason, your motive for for going in that direction in the first place because otherwise without that without any reason or motives or a mutual objective at some point you're going to pull back on that mission you're not going to take it all the way which is what they do it's what they do they seem like they're going somewhere but then they always go back in a different direction in an opposing direction because you thought they were with you but they never were they were never with you at all you thought they were along for the ride but no they were just putting you on a ride they put you on the ride on your own so that you could fuel them you could benefit them they could get something out of you but they weren't there with you you were on your own but that's good as well because once you develop that awareness and you realize and you tell yourself yes okay I am on my own that's when you were able to free yourself just by having that awareness and realizing that you were on your own because the problem is when you are still susceptible to the mobilization and you think that they really are along for the ride they're there with you when you think like that you're still being a little straight and you're moving further and further away from yourself which again is what they want because then you just think deeper and deeper into this hole where you are alone when no one is around to support you or to reciprocate anything back to you and again that's a part of the mobilization when they still think that you want them and they want you to think that they still want you with a purpose with something long term in mind so they can get you on this roller coaster without even realizing that you're the only one on it you're the only one along for the ride and you're going along with it and at first it may look like they're there they're watching you on the ride they're watching you having a good time because they care about you they want the best for you but then at some point hopefully you will look around and realize they're not even there anymore they're not even with you you're on your own and that is the point where you need to wake up and realize that it was all a game they were never there with you at all they were just kind of egging you on getting you into it and by doing that it reflects something back to them where they think that you still want them even though a lot of times you actually don't it's all one big game a shared fantasy because you don't actually want them anyway and you know I don't want to sit here and tell you what you want but I'd like to think if you're watching my videos that I do have an idea of what you want of what we all want and yeah you don't want that you don't want an illusion you don't want a fantasy that's why a lot of you in this right now you're on your own because you want to sort of better something more and you know that they don't want that that's why you're in this position now where you're watching my video and you're separate you're apart from them you're not with them right now of course the reason for that it's because you've shared different motives different ideals different objectives like I've said, narcissists they might be good for a one night stand to be honest I'm not even good for that I mean you really want to have sex with a crazy person something that's lacks love, lacks intimacy because I know that's what you really want a lot of you who watch my content that's what really that's what upset you isn't it that's what got to you is to think that someone who's supposed to be with you working with you towards something you're thinking are you know I wanted this I wanted something long term I wanted something real something where we work together towards a common goal but then it hits you and you realise that oh maybe this person didn't want that after all and then it hits you and you realise you're on this ride on your own you're on the merry-go-round just going round in circles until you just finally develop the awareness and you get off the ride but no they're not with you they don't want what you want they don't share a common objective goal of understanding and they never will which is how you ended up finding my videos in the first place that's how you ended up doing that because for one thing they can't be vulnerable they can't show you who they actually are because they already know that you don't want to see that they haven't developed that emotionally and mature they prefer dysfunction, playing games messing with your mind that's how they get there through but for you the excitement and fun comes from a different thing you don't like things that are too unpredictable you don't like the idea of waking up in the morning and not knowing where they are as I'm sure you've experienced before you want something more sustainable something that actually has a purpose and yeah they believe or not they want you to want that from them but they have no intention of ever giving that to you they already know that they can't that is the whole point of the false self of the illusion it's just to make you think that they can but of course there is a major flaw in the illusion because it only exists for a certain amount of time it doesn't last for long of course if it was sustainable then it probably was an illusion it must be real because the whole point of a false character and illusion these things it can't exist for a long period of time it just can't and be sustainable and consistent it can't it has to fall apart at some points if it is really fake the problem is a lot of you when the illusion does fall apart you're looking at it like oh no I've just lost something of value and then you feel it it's like you're missing a piece of your heart when what you should be doing is realizing that it was an illusion and at some point the illusion has to come to an end the actor has to walk off the stage that's how you need to see it and that's really the message that I want to leave you with today to realize that yes it is an illusion that's all that it is it's not real and you haven't lost anything other than a frauds an imposter an actor as John says there in the live chat yes a shared fantasy you're just sharing this fantasy with them they've fed it back to you but it's not real it all comes from your belief your belief is fueling their alternate reality that originally they created inside their heads and then they projected it into reality to pull you into it until you're locked into the fake worlds and then when they pull out you're thinking that you've lost something of value when all that's happened is they just left the illusion they left you in a fantasy that they originally created but then it became a fantasy of your own making they left you in the fantasy on your own and yeah but what you gotta do to really empower yourself at the end of the day is you need to take a look at that fantasy and pick apart what it is that resonates with you what it is that you actually want and then you need to take that and use it to motivate you to find something for real because they're never going to do that they're going to carry on in their little fake worlds and they're going to keep doing the same things all the time until the day they die but you can take the pieces of that fantasy that resonate with you and that you actually want and you can go out and get that for real that can become your real life there's no reason why you can't if it's something that you really need then it will benefit you and it will be good for people around you as well of course it's only a matter of time until that happens that can happen for real if you really want it so you don't have to see it as a bad thing that they've left you alone in this in this fantasy that they shared with you because you have this feeling of loss so you've lost something when you should use it to empower you and to motivate you don't see it as though I know I'm in this fantasy on my own or the fantasy is over and now it's all over for me and nothing else is going to continue after that no, you can make it happen with someone else not with them and you should not desire to have anything with them what is the point in life if we just live inside a bubble a dream with a fake person there isn't actually about anything for real what is the point in that just why you have to go out and do it on your own and that's why I'm curious to motivate and inspire you that's why I'm putting out these videos every day yeah, it makes me happy it uplifts me when I make these videos but I'm also doing it for you putting out this message to help you and I hope that it does I hope that it inspires and motivates you it just gets you to where you need to be to where you want it to be before you met this toxic and dysfunctional person and as you can see I am out here living my life my best life for real which is what I do every day I'm always out in nature exploring new things yeah, I hope the same for you as well I do recommend that you all spend time outside don't just be inside all the time thinking about the narcissist worried about what they're doing or who they're with you should be focusing on you as well and you know, what's good for you because we are around narcissists for long enough you're just thinking about really everything that is wrong with you everything that's no good everything that's just going to pull you in even deeper just going back to the car now get something to eat I'm going to cancel I'm not missing the car as well the car's going to be the car yeah, I hope this video was helpful to you thank you and if it was as always you can show your support down below by giving this video a thumbs up comment section share the video subscribe and I am available for one of my coaching which you can book on my website it is NarcSurvivor.co.uk and also check out my Instagram as well as many of you may know I'm traveling and I put new pictures and videos on there every day so you can check out my Instagram it is NarcSurvivor YouTube on Instagram okay, that's it for this video over one hour today I hope it was helpful, I hope it inspired you and as always I look forward to talking with you in another one