 I don't even think I could even count past 10. It sucks when my grandmother speaks Hindi to my dad and I have no idea what they're saying. I refuse to speak it because everyone around me was not Korean so I told my mom, if you don't speak to me in Korean, I don't want to talk to you. No! The culture's going to end in my generation. Do you feel ashamed for not being able to speak your parents' language doesn't make you a bad Asian? Is it worth losing your culture to make your life more fun? What's going on everybody? I've seen this question get posted on Reddit for the past 10 years now and no one's really came to any set conclusions on what it means if you can't speak your parents' language or is it really bad, is it not bad, can you make up for it? So today I'm going to break down the four main arguments, I'm going to add some solutions and maybe some recommendations at the end of the video and hopefully this just helps you think through this kind of unique issue that we have as immigrant kids of the diaspora. Obviously, this issue does apply to every culture, not just the Asian kids. So the main points I'm covering are, what actually determines how well you know your native tongue or your parents' language or your ethnicities language or your mother tongue. Should you feel less blank for being bad at the language? How much of the culture are you really missing out on and how you can make up for it if you feel guilty? And by the way, I am speaking from the heart and personal experience because on the Chinese language scale I probably realistically rank like a 1.5 out of 10. Hey listen, I'm far behind, but at least I know where I'm at. So before I get into this, please make sure you hit that like button down at the bottom and leave a comment at the end of the video because I would love to hear your thoughts. Point number one, what determines how well you can speak your parents' language? Well guess what? Everybody's situation is a little bit different, but here are some of the main factors. Your upbringing, your family and your situation. Right off the bat, if your parents speak some level of English, that probably means that you will speak more English growing up too. It also depends on how hard they wanted you to assimilate, assuming that that would lead to a better life in America. It also matters if your family speaks a very, very specific kind of obscure dialect that's going to impact how much you want to learn it too. Also, if you live near an enclave or if you go to a church, something that you know is like a cultural center. And another factor is actually the overall political narrative of that country. Or maybe you're the youngest born and therefore you are naturally furthest from tradition. Oh yeah, that's a good one because that's my reason. I can tell you this that back in the 90s, I kind of remember that there was a big push for English only and assimilation from the Asian community to ensure that we all, you know, could get really good jobs and go to college. And my school district didn't even offer Mandarin as a foreign language you could even take until my senior year, by which in that time it was too late. Point number two, do you or should you feel less for not being able to speak the language? Everybody's got to come up with their own standard for what makes them a good steward of the ancestral identity or a real Asian. Some people always say, oh yeah, I wish I could speak my parents' language better. But they don't really have any work to show for it. I also know people who speak their parents' language very well, but still say things like, yeah, I'm not really like connected to the culture. I just use it to speak to my grandma sometimes. The truth is for most people living in America, Asian or not, you won't have to speak another language other than English to thrive or even survive. Taking the time to learn your culture will be more for yourself and the culture in general than anything else. Point number three, do you actually understand how much of the culture you're missing out on by not speaking the language? The truth is it kind of depends on what you're trying to unlock from that culture, because yes, for sure, you are missing out on something. I'm missing out on a lot. For example, I know that I want to have basic conversations at restaurants with restaurant people about that food and culture. And for me, I want to understand enough about the history and the origin of certain Chinese characters. So of course, I got to know some of the language for that. And I follow a bunch of these really hilarious and ridiculous Chinese meme pages. So for that, I want to know more so I can understand more of what's going on so I don't always have to send it to my friends to help me translate. And yes, in some cases to date people of that culture, it does help to know more of that language, which makes perfect sense. Basically, just ask yourself what you want to get out of it and that's going to give you a goal to try to reach. And point number four, what can you do to make up for the fact that you don't speak your parents' language? The culture will probably end in your generation. Damn, dad, that's a heavy statement. Damn. Well, if you don't feel guilty about it at all, you don't have to do anything. But for those who do, here are some recommendations. One, you can consume all the content that you possibly can from that country, or at least that is in that language. And trust me, on YouTube, there's a lot of content from a lot of different countries. Two, you can frequent and support all the businesses owned by people from that culture. Three, maybe you can go back and take a trip but not just do it for Instagram photos but you actually are involved in some type of organization or mission strip or non-profit or profit, or just basically you're just doing some type of activity that's a lot deeper than just taking photos and trying the food. I had a friend who barely speaks Vietnamese. He went back and he actually hired a translator which wasn't very expensive to take him around for that whole week and that helped a lot. Hey, you could take all the classes and tutoring over Zoom or on YouTube that you want. Rosetta Stone, Lingo A's, Pem Slur, whatever you guys wanna take. And if you're like me, you'll just shamelessly speak that language as often as you can no matter how clunky the interaction is. I mean, when it comes to maintaining culture or preserving the culture, there are many ways to do it besides only learning the language, although I acknowledge the language is a big part of it. So basically it all comes back down to this self-aware meme on subtle Asian traits. Listen, it is hard to learn the language well in America unless you were immersed in that environment from a young age. So you gotta give some credit to the people who went on and did the work and maybe you don't wanna feel like it's your sole duty as a child from the diaspora to carry on the culture on your two shoulders. I mean, that is also a lot of pressure too but what I don't like to see is people always say, yeah, I'm proud of it. I'm proud of my parents' culture. I like the food and I think it's important to my identity. But they have no work to show for it because at the end of the day, listen, if you truly, truly care, you will do something. You'll do something to the point where at least you can say in your heart, hey man, I try. Honestly, with technology nowadays, it is never too late to connect back to the motherland. All right, everybody, let me know in the comments down below where you are at in your journey of carrying on your parents' culture. Maybe you don't care or maybe you just realized you care. Maybe you realized you always said you cared but you actually didn't do anything for it. So yeah, just let me know where you're at. For me personally, I'm pretty much at a 1.5 out of 10 on the Chinese language scale but am I really gonna get beyond three out of 10 for my life realistically without taking a rigorous course on it or moving back there for a while? I mean, maybe not, but I do sleep well knowing that, you know, I try all the time and it is important to me. All right, everybody, thank you so much for watching that video. I hope it was helpful and until next time, I'm out. Peace.