 Why do I always trust the wrong men? Hi, this is Helena Hart from commitmentconnection.com and in this video, I wanted to answer a question I received from a woman in our community who is wondering why she keeps attracting men that she can't trust and then why she ends up trusting them anyway and continually getting hurt. I know exactly how this feels. I think most of us women can relate to, you know, being in situations with men that we wish hadn't happened where we trusted them and then ended up getting hurt or disappointed or something like that. So my heart goes out to you for sure and I'm going to give you some tips on how to turn this around. So to answer your question, you know, why do you keep trusting the wrong kind of men or attracting men who are untrustworthy? There could be many answers to that. It could be lack of experience. It could be something about the men you're attracting, some common thread all throughout. But what I've really found in working with so many women over the years, you know, when it comes to dating and relationships is typically there were signs at the beginning that you either didn't see or you saw little glimpses of it and maybe your intuition was trying to tell you something about this man and you kind of ignored your intuition and went along with it anyway. And typically the signs are usually there from the beginning, not every single time. Of course, there's always exceptions to the rule. Some men are kind of out to gain your trust and then, you know, do something to hurt you. But I say that's a very, very small percentage of men. You know, most men I found are really good guys who don't mean to hurt you but they're just not always the right match for you for whatever reason. You know, I've definitely been in situations with men where, you know, something, you know, some little alarm went off in my intuition at the beginning. Like, you know, oh, he kind of drinks a little too much or he doesn't handle himself well when he drinks or he seems a little reckless, you know, the way he spends money or, you know, there's an ex-girlfriend hanging around him or he's really flirty with other women and he says they're just friends but my intuition was telling me that there was something more to it. And of course my intuition was right in all of those cases. Maybe you can relate but I ignored it for whatever reason. Maybe, you know, I was really caught up in the chemistry I felt with the guy or, you know, I was all caught up in my strong feelings I had which I thought were kind of rare and special and didn't happen all the time. So I ignored my intuition and those things absolutely came out as issues later, you know, just with different kinds of men. I'm sure some of you can relate. So to turn this around, I've really found that it's less about trusting the man. Of course it's important to trust the man that you're with but it all starts with you trusting yourself. That's like the foundation. That's where everything starts. So many of us just don't trust ourselves on very deep levels and then we kind of project that out there and then we attract men who are untrustworthy or, you know, we don't trust ourselves in relationships to make the best kinds of decisions. Where I say, you know, if you wanna attract that right man for you and create just an extraordinary relationship, you have to trust yourself more than anyone else. Like really trust that intuition. So I'm gonna give you a couple of tips on how to build that trust in yourself to where, you know, your intuition will kick in and you can really see, you know, if something doesn't feel right, you trust yourself to get out of there or to ask the right questions or to figure out what's going on. So it's not about being hyper-visual in and coming from a place of fear and constantly searching for red flags. That's absolutely not where it's at, but you do really wanna trust yourself and your intuition. So the first way to do that is really listen into your intuition. You know, as women, our intuition is this amazing gift that we all have and we receive messages from our intuition all day long, but are you in that place to really receive those messages and hear that guidance that we're trying to give ourselves. So really tune into our intuition. That's the first step. The second step is, you know, really keeping the promises and commitments you make to yourself. You know, when you think about what makes you trust someone else, well, a big part of that is, you know, they follow through with what they say they're gonna do. If he says he's going to call, he calls. Or if he says he's gonna take care of something, he does it. And that's how you kind of build that trust slowly over time. So you really wanna do that to yourself as well. So is there anything that you kind of keep telling yourself you're going to do, but you don't do it? You know, or you know, it could be anything. It could be something having to do with work or your living situation or your health. Maybe you keep telling yourself you're going to start eating healthy and working out. And for some reason that just hasn't happened yet. So watch what you're telling yourself and make sure you're keeping those commitments that you make to yourself and that you promise to yourself. And the last little tip on how to trust yourself more is see where you've done it before. See where you've really listened to your intuition and taken steps because of that and it turned out really well for you. So I really want you to start to see how powerful you really are and how much you can trust your intuition and how it always has your best interest in mind. And then you can slowly start to trust yourself. So where you can really open up to good men and trust that if something doesn't feel right, you can get out of there. That's actually what allows you to be totally soft and open on the outside. It's having that really, really strong trust on the inside. And that's actually what allows you to attract men who you can trust. If you trust yourself, you'll start to attract men who are very trustworthy and honest and they don't want to lie or cheat or hurt you. So it all starts with you trusting yourself, trusting that intuition and looking for the signs early on. Again, not coming from a place of fear or I have to safeguard myself against all these bad things that might happen. Instead, really having a strong trust in yourself to where you feel comfortable opening up and letting men get close as long as they're proving to you that they're good trustworthy men. So I hope that was helpful for you. I'd love to hear your thoughts on this and thank you for sending in your question. Thanks for watching. And if you'd like to discover exactly what to say and do to get the man and relationship you've always wanted, click the button on the right side of this video to visit our website and I will talk to you soon.