 Right, what are we making here? Carl's amazing breakfast smoothie. Let's see. What have we got? We've got an apple sliced up into little chunks and Cored I've got a banana which I'm about to chop up. I've got some bits of orange a little bunch of grapes I've got two cups of kale. I've got some cashew milk now here. You can already I hear already here You go, yeah kale. Gonna have kale and smoothie. No, no, no, no, no, no because that's green and that's vegetables And that's not soup. Yeah, you know what fuck you I can put whatever the fuck I like in my smoothie And that's exactly what I'm gonna do. Here we go. I've chopped up this banana Never stood a chance that goes in there That goes in there as well Oranges in there Wonder if I can just shake these grapes off now. I can't so I'm gonna have to pick them all off individually Shoulder than that before I start a film and shouldn't I really because now Just don't waste on that one still got a stalk on the fuck sake. I've dropped that one on the floor I can stay on the floor. I don't even care Jamie Oliver never had this problem, but then Jamie Oliver's fucking prick grapes putting these grapes in there. This is great camera work as well by the way if anyone's got a problem just just send me a postcard to PO box 111 Fuck you Put kale in there This is two cups of kale now Americans love measuring things by cups because they're idiots One cup. I believe is 250 mil So if you get try and fill a pint glass with with kale Pints 600 something mill I got some cashew milk a cup of cashew milk pour that into the thing Do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do-do probably don't want a full cup Wax that into the blender with everything else Like an idiot didn't get my lid out of dishwasher Got that now Close that up. Put the lid on Make sure the lid is actually on because otherwise everything's gonna go flying turn this on it's gonna get very loud You can see at the moment the kale hasn't quite got mixed in But it'll get there, it'll get there. Oh there it goes a little bit. It's going down, it's going down, it's going down It probably takes about five minutes to blend it up The apples you like I'm using Testo generic apples There's a little red bits. That's the red apple skin If you wanted it totally green, it could be names Adam Johnson for instance You could probably use granny smiths or any other fucking green apple I don't know. I'm talking shit because I'm waiting for this thing to finish I don't even know if you guys can hear me. It's like fucking really That's all I can hear at the moment. Yeah, you just blend that up until it's nice and Nice and green and smooth sometimes if you don't chunk up the apple before you stick it in there, sometimes you get some What's it called? Big chunks of apple, which some people like I guess Getting my pint glass out ready How long have we been blending this for now? Two minutes. I'm already late for work It's basically a quick breakfast Blender off check on the consistency Well, we've got seems all right. Maybe a couple more blends. Now, that's all nice and blended I can hopefully take the lid off. There we go. Let's pour it. Look at that. Look how fucking green it is So I'm Shrek's jizz Let's pour it into the thing Little bit lumpy. Maybe I should have blended it for a little bit longer Fucking cares There we go five a day in one cup Chug it down. If you don't like it. Fuck you. This isn't about you. It's about me