 When you run into the narcissist after no contact When you unexpectedly encounter the narcissist in public after having no communication with them for some time Many people wonder how the narcissist perceives them When they see them after no contact They wonder how the narcissist might regard understand or interpret them They wonder if the narcissist can recognize and appreciate their good qualities If the narcissist values and respects them How the narcissist perceives you after no contact will depend on how far long you are in the healing process It will depend on superficial things Such as how you look how you dress the car you drive and the people you are with Narcissists care about things that exist on the surface They are attracted to beauty money power and success So if any of those qualities have improved since you are lost in contact with the narcissist They will hold you to a higher regard They will secretly respect what you have achieved Although they may not respect you as a person It's all about what they can extract from you and even if you are willing to give something to them They don't respect that They just see you as a fool Someone that they are able to manipulate The only thing a narcissist is forced to accept is when you realize what they are When you walk away That is when they have no choice but to regard your feelings wishes or rights But as long as you remain around them They will have no regard for you if they see you in public and you haven't healed or progressed They're going to see you as something undesirable, but if you have managed to change will improve your life They are going to view you in a different light This may even make them re-idealize you It may make them want to come back to you Even if either of you have moved on and you are in relationships Most narcissists do not value loyalty or commitment It just gets in the way of them getting what they want But just because the narcissist may re-idealize you and love bomb you It doesn't mean that they care about you It doesn't mean that they have your best interest in mind They just see you as a tool that they can use to get what they want They only care about their own needs and they will use people to get those needs met Which is why you may notice that when they come back. There's no discussion or understanding of what happened in the past They don't want to talk about what they did to you because they don't care about how it affected you They have no interest in resolving anything They will come back like nothing happened Because they just want to take something from you They're just going to use you to make themselves feel better They're going to use you for supply They still see you as their property Even though some time may have passed since you were last with them They still see it as though you belong to them Regardless of what they did to you Regardless of what caused you to go into contact with them The narcissist has a strong sense of entitlement They feel like they have a right to be involved with you They believe that they are inherently deserving of whatever you have to offer and that is why they will come back to you like nothing happened If you have progressed after going no contact with the narcissist And you were doing so much better without them And then you run into them They will try to make eye contact with you They will try to read into how you feel To see if you're emotionally attached to them To see if they've still got a hold on you To see if they're still able to affect you emotionally Because that's supply for the narcissist To be able to control how someone sees them They need to use people So that they can see themselves however they want to be seen If they want to feel powerful They will triangulate you and try to hurt you While narcissists who are more feminine will try to flirt with you Because they want to feel desirable and attractive It's all about using you to make themselves feel good Often at your expense They will be very interested to see if you are still interested in them That's what will give them supply That's what will make them feel powerful or desirable But many narcissists can be very prideful and arrogant They can have an excessively high opinion of themselves They can have an exaggerated sense of their own worth While they trick themselves into thinking that they're better than you They experience delusions of grandeur Which then causes them to ignore you or treat you with contempt As though you are worthless or beneath their consideration When really, they're just insecure They are uncertain and anxious about themselves A confident person isn't going to look down on anyone How we feel about ourselves affects how we treat other people The narcissists may treat you with contempt But they actually believe that you are superior to them And that's why they try to put you beneath them In an attempt to feel like they are better than you Another reason why the narcissists will ignore you in public Is because they are afraid of rejection They are afraid that you will just ignore or dismiss them They are afraid that you won't want anything to do with them The narcissist isn't going to put themselves in a position where they could be humiliated There is nothing more important to a narcissist than their image and reputation How they looked at other people Everything they do is designed to make them look good So they are not going to put themselves in a situation where they believe that they might be rejected But if they do decide to take their chances It's only because they believe you have something to offer them It's not because they care about you It's not because they value you as a human being They're not coming back to give anything to you They have nothing to give Narcissists are takers They only come around you to take something from you But they have nothing to share with you other than misery and pain Which is why that's what you always experience anytime that you're around them If you have a conversation with them They might just use it to emotionally abuse you To cause you stress and anxiety Because all they have to share with you is their misery and pain You're not going to get anything else because that's all they have to give Anything good they possess is only something that they have taken from you And that's the only reason why they come around you Misery loves company They want to share their misery with you They want to re-traumatise you Narcissists can only pull you down to their level They can only undo all of the hard work you have put into healing yourself They don't have the tools to build anything with you All they can do is destroy everything that you have built for yourself Which is why you need to avoid interacting with them You need to avoid making eye contact The narcissist may try to force themselves onto you And in these situations You need to keep the conversation short They may ask questions But you should only give short responses Tell them you're busy Tell them you have things to do Just walk away You don't have to talk to the narcissist They only come around you to get supply To feed off your emotions whether they are positive or negative They want to get your attention They want to get you to react to them And any reaction you give to them Will only give them satisfaction Which is why you have to remain neutral Don't display your emotions If you give them an emotional reaction It will only feed their ego It will only make them feel like there's something special or important As though there's something significant to you Which is what narcissists want Narcissists are codependent They want to feel like you want them They want to feel like they mean something to you But whether you feel attracted to the narcissist Or you feel angry or upset None of this has anything to do with what is actually happening in the present moment Seeing the narcissist in person Is causing you to relive the initial trauma And you may experience emotional flashbacks But to avoid this try to think logically Rather than entertaining the thoughts and emotions That arise from seeing the narcissist Don't resist those thoughts and emotions What you resist persists it will only get stronger Be aware of how you think and feel in that moment But don't feed into it Simply accept that those thoughts and feelings are there And just observe them It's normal to feel that way after everything you have endured When you allow those thoughts to be there It becomes much easier to let them go And then you can put the focus back on yourself Then you can walk away and return to your life The narcissist doesn't respect you They don't even see you as a real person People are just objects that they use To feel better about themselves They don't care about what you want They don't care about how you feel All they want is power and control over you They want to feel like they're worth something At your expense And that is why you should not waste your time and energy on them Your time is valuable And if you invest it into the narcissist You will not get anything back You will not get a return on your investment Because they're not worth anything Invest it into yourself And its value will be multiplied Because you are worth something You are a good investment Practice self care Practice self love Focus on raising your vibration And you will notice that the narcissist just doesn't vibe with you anymore You will notice that you begin to attract a new group of people who are more on your level People who vibrate with peace, love and joy When all the narcissist ever gave to you was misery and pain Thank you for watching I hope this video resonated with you Please like, comment, share and subscribe Click the bell icon to receive notifications for my future videos Check out the new Narc Survival website At www.narcsurvivor.co.uk Where you can read my blog posts, book coaching sessions and join a support forum If you would like to donate My paypal link is in the video description Coaching inquiries You can email me at coaching at narcsurvivor.co.uk Thank you for watching and I'll talk to you soon