 All right, thanks everyone for joining us this morning for our first Revised NetSquared event for Adelaide So my name is Ryan One of the local NetSquared organizers and Was involved a very long time ago with Ben who you can see on the call as well when NetSquared first launched in Adelaide Just before we start and Kat introduces our guest for today I just want to quickly share my screen and just explain a little bit about NetSquared and What it's all about and why we think this is a good thing to bring back to Adelaide So NetSquared is a program of TechSoup If you don't know what TechSoup is it's a funny name for a Global network of nonprofits that work to support other nonprofits and and help them do their work better So our local NetSquared organizers and Adelaide and Darwin are myself and Kat So NetSquared program of TechSoup NetSquared is basically a global network of tech that would meet up So we're all about how we can use technology to Help the positive parts of the world And then as it says on the slide TechSoup is a nonprofit that helps other nonprofits get implement and use technology effectively So the NetSquared global network very aligned with the TechSoup global network So you can see we had a a Lot of countries 41 countries Elias probably isn't even up to date. I reckon you've probably got some more countries lurking on the Couch cushions. Well, COVID has thrown, you know the spanner into the works for many things, but Largely truth Yeah, so we might be a program of NetSquared but of TechSoup global but locally NetSquared organizers are volunteers running these as community meetups But we get some good resources from TechSoup like the support of Eli and The the great platform that we're using for the event bookings So the NetSquared community values we welcome everyone we put community first so we're here to support each other You know, we don't want people in here trying to sell things We build stronger nonprofits Now technology is one of the tools that can be used to do that, but it's really nice that the first presentation We've got this here from Jonas is less about the technology and and more about Other tools to strengthen nonprofits We invite participation so in a couple of slides We're open to if anyone wants to get involved in running NetSquared then reach out And we treat each other with kindness and respect So we do As I said it's community event So If we have people who want to get involved in running NetSquared or anyone that can benefit from the experience of being involved If you're in Adelaide you can get involved with with Katnaya with running the local group If you're not in Adelaide you can get involved by chatting to Eli About the NetSquared group in your town or if you don't have a NetSquared group in your town starting one So if you haven't heard of TechSoup you may locally have heard of connecting up So connecting up are the local TechSoup partner in Australia They're actually based in Adelaide And they are the the arm that helps nonprofits with their technology donations locally So people like Microsoft I actually thought I'd never do this again Ben, but people like Microsoft Autodesk Box Google they provide technology donations through connecting up and they help nonprofits access those donations And then if you need help with that technology either reach out to connecting up or TechSoup have a forum that you can go to and get advice and experience from other nonprofits All right locally your sponsors refuel creative Which is where I'm from and create your change, which is where Kat's from We are volunteering our time and resources to make sure these events happen And with that said I will hand over to Kat to introduce today's guest Thank you, Ryan. I am so excited to be here and even more excited to I have Jonas Kane on the the webinar with us this morning to kick off the Reimagining of NetSquared here in Adelaide. I cannot imagine a more perfect person to talk about positivity and to get everything going I've known Jonas. I've actually lost track of how long I've known Jonas I knew him when he was a professional Magician and a darn good one at that and it's been an amazing thing to watch his Evolution as a human performance consultant positivity coach experienced designer and facilitators he says a facilitator of Fascination his company hashtag positivity literally reaches around the world to lift others up and To help them have a more positive outlook on life He has authored ten books some of it don't own yet I need to do something about that and is the host of on a positive note Podcast and also produces a free weekly coaching series to help enhance clarity confidence Enjoy, so it is my distinct honor and privilege and pleasure to introduce you to my very good and dear friend Jonas Kane Thank you so much Kat for that wonderful Introduction and thank you just for having me. I'm so happy that you and everyone is here I'm coming to you from my home office in Holyoke, Massachusetts in the United States and I'm just thrilled that you are all here for this very special live edition of on a positive note for as Kat Just said I have a podcast called on a positive note check it out on a positive note calm In those episodes are all pre-recorded and they're out in the world But you folks because you registered and have said yes to this and are attending You are the only ones who will get to experience what we're about to do to to talk about today So I'm so happy you're here Just the other day we had Actually before before I say this I have a question for you folks. I'm taking vociferous notes over here I encourage all of you to do the same thing if you have a piece of paper Or if you have a note taking app on your computer tablet or phone I encourage you to take notes as we go along I have a question and I'd like you to write down your thoughts on your answer to this And the question is this Have you ever said yes to something? That later on you wished you would said no to Have you ever said yes when you wish you would have said no And as a follow-up related question, have you ever said yes to too many things? Just jot down a sentence or two About your experience with this and the reason I even bring this up Is the other day here in the united states was Super Bowl sundae I don't know if anyone outside of the united states really cares about Super Bowl sundae But it's a pretty big deal in the united states cat says no no one cares But every time the Super Bowl comes around I think about an experience I had years ago with the Super Bowl and the experience was when I was invited to not one But several Super Bowl parties and I made I mean how blessed am I to have so many loved ones in my life? Let's just stop and appreciate that right, but let's also Notice and recognize a critical error that I made I said yes to all of them And there's a problem to saying yes to so many things One you're never going to get to actually enjoy the game Because you're going to spend most of your time Going to and from different parties and to you're not even going to be able to enjoy the company With the people that you're with because you're already going to be thinking about where you're supposed to go next And every time and this is so true in so many aspects of our lives every time we say yes to something That's the same as saying no To anything and everything else we could be doing and In a similar way Every time we say no to something that's the same as saying yes to all the potential possibilities A positive practice then Is to be mindful of what we're saying yes And no to it with great clarity focus our attention on the behaviors that truly matter most Because without this clarity of focus we run the risk of falling victim to what's called an external locus of control Where we release control of our lives and we'll never achieve what we most desire because we've released control of our experiences and yet When we do have this clarity of focus we'll find that will always maintain control of our experiences Because few things in life Are more powerful Than a life lived with passionate clarity And that my friends is the heart of what we're talking about today on this special live edition Of on a positive note We're going to unpack The three pillars of positivity. These are accurate Accessible and actual principles and practices that you can apply to to your work to your life at home your personal professional lives to your community and beyond If you've kept track of the latest trends in positivity, which I do constantly I'm constantly Looking up the latest articles and in research on this topic You'll you're likely going to find that positivity often has a negative wrap There's a slew of of articles out there talking about what they call toxic positivity where this excessive focus on Positivity and on being happy is actually causing more harm than good in their arguments are valid when we're When when we're talking about that kind of positivity where we just throw on rose colored glasses And pretend everything is fine when we just sweep everything Under the rug and throw everything into a closet so our lives look like they're great But our lives are still a mess in reality It's not very positive when we are focusing on being nice and doing what we think people want us to do or saying What you what what we think people want want to hear what we're talking about instead Is about choosing to be kind doing what needs to be done even the hard stuff Saying what needs to be said even the things that are difficult to say The three pillars of positivity that we're going to unpack in just a moment So I encourage you to get out your piece of paper. You know taking app. These are accurate Accessible and actionable principles and practices that you can hone in and focus on We can just focus on these three pillars And if you have strengths in each of these core areas, oh my goodness, they can have exponential growth in your life So I'm just going to outline them really quickly and then we'll unpack them So get your pens and papers ready the first pillar of positivity is mindset The second pillar of positivity is purpose And the third pillar of positivity is relationships In real quick, I'll just explain a little bit about each one mindset specifically we're referring to a growth mindset Where we believe in our ability to learn new knowledge and gain new skills And it's also refers to in internal locus of control Rather than an external locus of control Where we believe we have the ability to influence our experiences So that's mindset Number two is purpose And this is having clarity of purpose where your life has direction You wake up every day excited. You have something to aim for and this is the key something to look forward to Mindset helps us to stay grounded in the present moment But purpose gives us something to look forward to as well And lastly relationships. This is about the the positive social support that we surround ourselves with They can help celebrate With us when times are good But they can also Help pick us up and remind us of our value even when When we forgot it So before we dive headfirst into each of these pillars, I invite you once again To just jot down your thoughts about which pillar is your rock Which pillar is you know, you're already an expert in that you know that you're solid in Acknowledge where your strength lies with these pillars, but also Acknowledge where you could use some work If you want you can you can quantify this maybe on a scale of one to five say, you know Where five is your really strong one is where you need a lot of work And do that for each of these three pillars Enough do you have jotted down a few things? I'm just curious if you're willing I'm not going to force you but if you're willing Put in the chat box. What your what pillar is your strength? And then put in the chat box what your weakness is And I encourage you to do this because we have oh, how many people do we have in this session? I think we have seven people here and we're going to oh We have eight now. Sarah just came in. Hello, Sarah It's good to have you What we'll find is some people's Strength is someone else's weaknesses and some someone's weakness will be someone else's strength So I encourage you to share with with with one another I have things I'll be sharing but along the way if you have questions Or comments you wish to share I encourage you to put them in the chat box and we can address those and perhaps other attendees can address them as well Let's see Checking out question. Have you ever said yet? Oh, yep. So cat put in I'm just seeing all these comments now strengths relationships That's great. Eli in weakness mindset That's a big one for a lot of folks Uh cat still working and growing with mindset and purpose So I will say this though about you cat. I've known you it seems like it's been forever you I can say You are certainly strong in your in your relationship. So so that is that is a great point Vicki uh strength mindset weakness relationship. So that's a great pairing there and then Ben mindset is your strength weakness is relationships Let's see. Sarah. I need a moment to pick up on what's going on. Oh, yes. Yes, Sarah So let me explain what what's happening here. We're going over the three pillars of positivity mindset Is having having uh having a growth mindset you can gain new knowledge and skills You have an x you have an internal locus of control. You you have a control and influence over your experiences Purpose you have something to look forward to something to aim for In relationships, you have positive social support that can lift you up in times of trouble and celebrate with you when times are good All right, so we have lots of great responses here And I'm curious to know to to the the moderators if there's any way we might be able to save this chat Because because I'd like to there's a lot to go through here. I'm seeing the head nods great Is going to be recorded and distributed out and I'll be sending you a copy Jonas Fantastic. Thank you so much cat all right, well We have just gained a Pulse on our strengths and our weaknesses in these areas. We're going to dive right in now with mindset and I'm going to share my screen Because on this screen I have oh, how many oh, that's the wrong one. Oh, or is it the right one? It is the right one. Yes. We have one two three four five six. We have eight words fascination inspiration motivation positivity joy kindness empathy and confidence These are all words that we can qualify them as as positive words. These are words that If we focus on them and I see kindness is right right in there That's that's one of the of the values of of net squared kindness and respect, right? So these words if we focus Facilitate positive experiences for each other empathy confidence. These are all positive things In a moment, we're going to go into the proverbial mind It's said that that minors when they go into a mine They have to sift through tons of dirt just to find a single ounce of gold The secret is They don't go in looking for the dirt. They go in looking for the gold So these words these are our gold and the mine is a it's a word search So the next screen I'm going to share it is a word search In your mission as a positivity minor is to go into this word search Looking for as many of these words as you can And the these words will be on the screen next to the the the puzzle So you don't have to worry about not being able to find them. I'm but here's the catch I am putting only 30 seconds on the clock So you only have 30 seconds your mission Is to collect as much gold collect as much positivity as you can In these words I'm going to stop this screen. I'm going to share the puzzle now and three two And oh wrong one wrong one and go here it is five seconds All right, and that alarm means We are done. All right put in the chat box. How many words did you find did you find one two? Three four all of them four. Oh cap found nine. Oh nine. That's catch the star She is a star seven five four All right, so I'm leaning into negativity. I'm like, I guess I'm just going to keep on looking at that over and over again Wait, so who just said that was that was that elie? It was So so elie so what word did you find? I Just looked at negativity and then I just kept on reading it over and over again. I'm like, I guess that's the thing I'm going to dwell in today And and let's be honest here. You did you you have stumbled on to the true lesson here And I think cat did too if she found nine words is that There are more words in this puzzle than just these gold nuggets than just these these positive words, but there are an equal number of positive words as negative words and And oh my goodness you latched right on to that negative word And this goes right into research by psychologists. They have found that humans have what's called a negativity bias where Where they just latch on to what's wrong with our lives and what's missing from our lives and we just sort of brush off The good things and they and they they have speculation as to why this is but really who knows anything about anything but they say it's because uh When our ancestors thousands and of of years ago if they didn't focus on threats they would get eaten by a tiger or they would starve to death So if you didn't focus on threats then you were in a lot of trouble the problem is We're living in a modern world Being interpreted through an ancient brain our evolution hasn't quite caught up with us yet If we believe What's going on in the research is this fantastic book by steven pinker Called the the better angels of our nature the world is actually doing much better Then we think if all we do is listen to the news and The the negativity on social media you wouldn't believe it but the world is actually much safer than it used to be Uh, but we have this negativity bias and they say our brains. It's kind of like Like a spotlight attached to a vacuum cleaner What our mind focuses on what it gives attention to it shines a light on it So we can't see anything else but because of the vacuum cleaner it shoots it up into us Right, so it's this idea that what we give our attention to we latch on to in in e-line Unfortunately, you just latch right on to that negativity literally right away So the secret again is in this puzzle there were more positive words There were there was an equal number of positive words as negative words. However you likely found more positive words than negative words Because that's what you went in looking for and I see ben says that he saw courage But then it turned into discouragement. Well, that's interesting because it was always discouragement But you latched on to the positive side in in any situation Yes, we could we could look at the downside for why everything's wrong Or we can look at the positive side for look at the opportunities Even within these struggles, right? So that's the idea here. We found more positive words Then negative words. Oh Karen found an equal number of positive And you know what that means Karen? I think what that means high five. You are just a very aware person Which is very unique. That's something that that I I get what I call what what's called cognitive overload. I just get overloaded. I have to limit things I have to I literally put my phone on airplane mode. So I'm not getting notifications You know, it's because I just get overloaded But that is a special skill to have Karen in only 30 seconds kudos So we get what we get what we focus on is the moral of the story If we want positive experiences Then we could focus on the opportunities if we want negative experiences and let's be honest Sometimes we do who who doesn't love a pity party from every now and again But if we're ready for something more then we can get it There are three quotes. I'd like to share with you Victor Frankel Napoleon Hill And my personal favorite the comedian Stephen Wright And these quotes are all different, but they all speak towards the same thing Victor Frankel says When we're not able to change our circumstances we become challenged to change ourselves It isn't that a great example of Going into the gold mine looking for the gold rather than the dirt It doesn't change the fact that you're surrounded by dirt, but it changes what we're focusing on changing our focus Napoleon Hill said the worst thing that can happen to you may be the best thing for you So long as you don't let it get the best of you and uh I've heard from number Of folks but before that they said that's one of their favorite quotes. So I'm going to repeat it again The worst thing that can happen to you may be the best thing for you So long as you don't let it get the best of you This is a tough one because some negative experiences are really heavy. Some situations are truly heavy. I um I met a woman once where She It was this elderly woman and I'm a terrible judge of age So, you know, I'd say maybe give her take a few years. She was about 102 or 103 years old I don't know. I'm terrible. I'm a terrible judge of age. She was probably 80 or something I don't know But she she was choking on on her food and even though she was able to cough up her food. Okay She was fine. She was visibly distraught by this. It was this traumatic experience for her every even though everything was fine and the reason it was so traumatic for her is not long earlier just maybe a couple weeks earlier She also choked on her food and she said that time it was It was even worse. She couldn't cough up her food She literally couldn't breathe and her husband said her face had started to turn gray someone nearby had to perform the Heimlich honor and just pounding away at this frail hundred something year old woman and Probably before what has been too late finally Finally it dislodged and she was able to breathe And they were afraid that even though she could breathe fine that maybe she broke some ribs because you know, you she You know, she was this frail woman So they brought her to the hospital To do some tests and x-rays and whatever that is doctors do They didn't find any broken ribs But what they did find is the reason i'm sharing this story right now They found an aneurysm That was about to burst here's this 90 100 something odd year old woman. She lived it into her entire life. She went through this terrible near-death experience And yet that near-death experience prolonged her life if she didn't have that experience Then it she surely would have died sooner It can be said that there's nothing good about tragedy That it's better to be happy than sad. It's better to be at peace than chaos It's better to swallow our food rather than than to choke on it But just as choking on a piece of food Can have a greater Purpose in our lives. I would suggest that perhaps perhaps there's something too what napoleon says That the worst thing that can happen to you may be the best thing for you So long as you don't let it get the best of you a This this happened also to a friend of mine more recently Where he he threw out his back golfing They brought him to the hospital to get like, you know some You know, whatever it is doctors do to fix you up and Turns out they discovered he had very early. They caught it early early thyroid cancer and He he never would have gone to the hospital say hey check out if I have cancer But here's this this experience. No one wants to experience their back going out. I've had my back go out It's painful And yet They was able to catch something that if he if it didn't happen It surely would have been a worse experience. So what we're going to do now I encourage you to get your piece of paper out and think about An experience from your past it could be big it could be small It could be as simple as getting stuck in a traffic jam or maybe stubbing your toe or it could be a big thing think about a negative experience That was that was that was difficult for you to handle at the time And think about how it made you feel think about of course Um the different emotions surrounding it and just jot down in just a few words a sentence or two What that experience was I won't ask you to share because of course these these sort of things are personal But what I will invite you to do I'll invite you to play what The the author elinor h porter calls the glad game There's a 1913 book called polyanna Where the title character Polyanna I see karen shaking her head. Have you read this book karen? so So you've probably heard of this game of of the glad game polyanna has become so synonymous with these overly optimistic person that the term polyanna now refers to someone who is optimistic So the idea of the glad game is you think of something Unfortunate You find a way to be glad about it and the example and and karen you'll of course remember this The experience that polyanna shared early on was how Her father bought a doll for her but instead of a doll the shop sent a pair of crutches In what kid expecting a doll wants a pair of crutches So she played the glad game and she thought about it and she realized I'm just glad that I don't need the crutches It doesn't matter how silly it is or how small it is finding something to latch on to to find the opportunity So so I encourage you whatever you just wrote down Think about what the opportunity was to find a way Something to latch on to to be glad about Of course with the choking woman. She was just glad that That that they were able to catch the The aneurysm my friend who his back went out. He was glad that they they they caught the cancer I've been glad before that Uh For instance, this was a number of years ago I lost a a lot of work during the recession and I was glad that that gave me free time to work on my more creative endeavors Yes, I lost a lot of money in my business But it gave me a lot of free time to get more creative and develop more clarity of what I really want to be doing It's amazing how much they say Experiences a great teacher But that's only partially true because it's really Reflective experience that is a great potential teacher So so having good having time to pause and reflect and really focus our attention on what truly matters most much like we were talking about Right up at the top of the hour so by now I I hope you've had an opportunity to jot down a few thoughts about something you're glad about before we move on Uh to the next pillar I would like to just acknowledge that this is of course easier said than done Even me I like to think of myself as mr. Positivity Mr. Positivity, but even me I find myself often Uh getting caught up with the hustle and bustle of everyday life things get heavy. It's easy to forget They're really building into your days Moments to reflect and really remind yourself Of this will certainly make this easier And before we move on I'd like to also check back into the chat box to see if there's any questions anyone has Let's see, uh, oh did Eli have to leave? Okay, I'm just seeing that now So Karen you've been playing it since a child. That's wonderful. I'm giving you a high five from afar. This is an international high five Let's see, uh, Okay, this is cat. My husband gets annoyed with me for always trying to see a positive in every situation And I've met paul. He's a He's a delightful man. He is a he is a delightful man, but uh, but yeah You know that I think that goes to back to what we're talking about earlier about the toxic positivity in the sense that some people Uh, it's it can be a trigger for some people You know, some people have those triggers where uh Perhaps who knows uh what what their past experiences were but maybe they were once told to shove their Um, their their emotions down and and not focus on their on their problems Which again is um, not the kind of positivity that we're talking about not sweeping things under the rug But really focusing facing things head on Uh, so some people might just have a misconception about what we mean. So that's a possibility All right, I don't see anything else coming in So let's Dive back. Oh sara. I am going to have oh sara's leaving. Oh my goodness. Well, well sara. Uh, it's a pleasure to have you Sarah's glad about a growing community of people interested in understanding how the mind works freeing ourselves This is wonderful. She loved the quotes Thank you, and you're welcome Feeling torn between learning and practical work Commitments. Yes, that is a huge challenge. So for those of you who don't know, I'm running my own business hashtag positivity I'm also enrolled full-time in a graduate program studying education at Purdue University So balancing education learning balancing running a business Balancing so many things and and I also just signed a long-term contract working in a local high school with with students so It's easy to get torn between all these different responsibilities Which is why more than ever it's so important to really build in those moments of Grounding reflection and self-care to focus on the gold nuggets acknowledging the dirt organizing your dirt In in seeing perhaps that we can Shine some of that dirt because because maybe hidden within that dirt is the gold. Oh, I see cat is saying something My husband wants to be oh, I'm not going to say that Yes, yes, sometimes Sometimes getting out the rage is what we need It's a very it's a very good point cat All right, let's dive in to purpose And this is one of my favorites Well, they're all my my favorite, but what I love about this one is I have a riddle for you imagine this There are three frogs sitting on a log One day one of the frogs decides to jump off the log and swim in the water How many frogs are left on the log you can put it in the chat or maybe hold up your fingers if your video is on Okay, cat says to Karen says to Uh, let me see if there's any more videos. Let me expand this a little bit. All right, so far. We're seeing two Seemingly you would think that the answer is two, right? It that makes sense. That's the obvious answer. Oh, oh, okay cat is changing your mind Yes, because remember this is a riddle so it's never the obvious answer If there's three one decides to jump off that would leave two, but here's the problem The frog that decided to jump only decided that's what it wanted to do But never took the time to jump into action There is a difference between deciding and action. There's a difference between Desire and follow through So even though this is just a riddle It does point to the truth because if we're honest with ourselves, how many times have we Failed to act on our decisions and instead remain like that Frog on a log or perhaps even worse. We failed to act Because we didn't know what it was we wanted to do. Sometimes that's the case. Sometimes we don't have that clarity of focus So what this pillar is encouraging us to do Is to reflect on What it is that we're doing but more importantly reflecting on on who we are and here's another quote that I've searched I've scoured the the internet for the primary source of this quote It's attributed to too many people. So I'm not going to attribute it to anyone. I think it's just one of those general life isms We are human beings Not human doings And again, I've counted too many people who say that they said it but I don't know. I don't know who said it someone said it We are human beings Not human doings and this I believe has the seed of what we're looking for because it suggests that we have two purposes We have this inner primary purpose which concerns our being and who we are And then this secondary outer purpose which concerns What we do with who we are how we express who we are and the challenge here though is we often spend so much time just focusing on what we do rather than who we are because That's what we've been raised to think, you know as kids especially as teenagers. What's The question on our parents mind and on our teachers mind What are you going to do with your life? And then as adults when we figure things out and we and we Do things and we decide what we're going to do and we're doing them What's one of the first things we ask others when we meet them for the first time? What do you do? This is what I do. What do you can this is what I do karen What do you do do do we're focusing on all these do's and of course we're going to pass over who we are The challenge is when we focus too much on what we do on the outside Without thinking about who we are on the inside Well, we're going to run into problems every time because what we do on the outside should really be informed by who we are on the inside And when we do We'll find that regardless of what's going on around us It will have a perfect fit within who we are So we can live an authentic purpose driven life The question becomes how might we Focus more on who we are so that when we do things it can have that That that balance so we can really effectively express who we are Let's do this next part together I encourage you to close your eyes just to remove any any outside distraction. So I encourage you to close your eyes and Take a nice big deep breath in Really fill your lungs and breathe out and I invite you to think about your inner purpose About the role that you serve in this life about who you are Now if you'd like you can confine yourself To the role within your organization, whether it's your job or volunteer work or you could think about It you can expand it to your meta role of Who you serve in life itself For example, I I fulfill my role as a human performance consultant instructional designer and facilitator of fascination But these are but my my meta role is really to Uh to remind people that they matter so they can survive Feel alive and thrive. That's my really my my meta purpose and everything I do is informed by that inner purpose So my question for you is what's your inner purpose? What role do you serve? Take another deep breath in Fill the lungs and breathe out one more deep breath in And breathe out and now open your eyes Take a moment Just jot down a few thoughts about what came to mind just now Again, it might be about your your meta purpose your your meta Inner purpose or it could be if you're focusing on on work right now It could be what your role is in your in your organization. I love to see you smile cat I just recently learned to play the ukulele I'm a trained saxophonist, but I find the saxophone is way too attrusive over virtual meeting calls So I use the ukulele instead Well, I'm going to share with you folks now Are seven questions That will help you focus on your inner purpose And outer purpose that help help you to to to find that balance to to work through that authentic character In these seven questions are Number one, it's the mission question. And really that's the one we just went over. What's your role? What's your inner purpose? If you want to think about it through the organization, what's your job title? Again, it could be your company's job title your spiritual job title Number two is the desire question The desire question is what do you want to do? So in other words, you know your role, you know your inner purpose. Well, what what's a way that you can Express that what do you want to do with that? So that's the desire question number three is the value question In this one just says well, why is this important? So so this goes back to the To the ethos, you know, you know the the the character. This is this is about your values, right? Why is it important? Number four is the ability question What can you do? What can you do? This is important because It really helps us to focus in on That it reminds us that we're that we're good enough where we are we are enough to get started We are enough we we already have experiences. We have abilities. We're enough to get started However, there might be a huge gap between what you're currently capable of doing And what you want to do and in that case, this is also encouraging Because then that fills in our to-do list well We know what what we can do and when we have this positive mindset where we can gain new knowledge and skills Well on our to-do list fill in that knowledge and skills gap Maybe it's attend a workshop go to our training get some volunteer experience Ask for a promotion or ask to volunteer to gain experiences a slew of ways to fill in that gap So that's number four number five The responsibility question what must you do? And this is important for many reasons. I'm going to highlight two of them. One of them is that What we must do when it's not in alignment with what we want to do So one of two things are going to have to happen we either have to Delegate our responsibilities to someone else Or we have to change our plan to get there right because because every time Anytime we say No to something that's the same as saying yes to something every time we say yes That's the same as saying no we can't do it all Right, so the responsibility question helps us with clarity and focus But the other reason this this question is important is think about this for a moment You will never be held responsible for something that you're not capable of doing That's a heavy one. That's that's a big one. You will never be held responsible for something you're not capable of so this also Answers part of the ability question if you must do it then you can do it Number six The commitment question. What will you do? And this goes back to that frog on the log the frog wanted to swim But wasn't committed to it All right, so the commitment question. What will you do just because you want to swim that doesn't mean you will swim What are you willing to do? This is kind of an attitude thing too, right? What's your attitude around this? If it's if it's a drag to do to get yourself motivated, you're never going to do it But if you're excited, oh my goodness if you wake up every day excited about it There's a much better chance you're going to do it The last question the requirement question. What do you need? And this is a valuable one because it might be resources It might be time It might be new opportunities It might be people mentors It might be support There are a slew of things that you might need and these and he's getting clear on what on what you need on the requirements can really help you When when when when all the other ducks are in a row if we don't if we don't hone in on also on our Requirements, then that's also going to set us up to fail All right. I'm looking back into the chat. Oh cat. Thank you so much for for Gaff box. I I I really appreciate that All right, I I'm being cognizant of the time I know that we had definitely allotted a full hour to to this So before we jump into the relationship pillar, I do want to just open this up if anyone has any questions or comments about The purpose pillar or perhaps any comments or questions about these seven questions You just throw it in the chat box And we can address that. All right. I don't see anything coming in These are all good need more time to sit with them. Yes, ben. You absolutely hit the nail on the head With this session really it's it's it's it's starting us off on a positive note. These are my note cards My note cards help me know what to say. I also have cue cards if I forget what to say I have cue cards as well. You're absolutely right This is really an overview. So taking time after today and moving forward to really digest these is very very important and again, what's nice is that they're just three And it's good to hone in. You don't have to focus on all three because as we did at the top of Of the session, we already know where our strengths are Starting where the weaknesses are and if it's two pillars just Focus on on the one that that is actionable for you that that you know, you know I'm just going to hone in on this one aspect. Maybe for you. It's relationships. Maybe it's purpose Or maybe it's mindset hone in on just one of these It really Focus and and start making positive changes in that one area. Oh, we have another question How do you know what your mission is? Well That's the million dollar question. Isn't it vicki? And and that is something that's really No one but you can answer that But what I have found in my own experience it's Ways that I've been able to sift through The noise in the distraction is my own life is what What gets you excited What sparks joy? What do you think about even when you should be thinking about other things? There's this book out by Marie Kondo called spark joy and I've had friends who have recommended this book to me. I finally just bought it. So I I haven't read it yet But the thesis from the book from what my friends have have told me it's it's really focusing on I mean this book is specifically on decluttering your life like your living spaces But the way that I interpreted what my friends were saying about this book is what sparks joy You know, if something is a drag for you Then you know that that's not your mission But if it sparks joy if it sparks passion if you If you just can't stop thinking about it like like for me, I just I'm really I'm really passionate about working With emerging leaders and their influencers, you know, you know To really help spread positivity to help people survive thrive and come alive and the reason this is important to me is This this is this is through my own authenticity my own character I went through a dark time in my life and cat knows this I went through a really dark time where I experienced a profound loss I didn't have the internal resources to really know how to how to handle it well nearly lost my life because of depression and grief and suicidal tendencies. It was it was a really heavy situation in my life and When I came out of that on on the other side of grief After three years, I was I became fascinated With how I was able To manage that transition to manage all that change it and come out on the other side Not unscathed. I'm a completely different person now But I became fascinated about how I was able to do that and how other people are able to do that And it sparked joy in me to understand the transformation I went through but then you know, it's sort of like if you hear that if you hear good news You can't help but share it with someone, right? It's like so So I spent over a decade researching and studying and gathering all these things and in Losing sleep losing, you know, just because because you just get so excited. That's the kind of excitement that I'm talking about It's like, you know, it's it's everything else is going crazy around you But you're laser focused on this one thing. What do you get excited about? Vicki, what what what makes your heart flutter and soul sing? What occupies your mind? What are you obsessed about? And It might not necessarily be what you're currently doing or maybe it is but just in in an adjusted way I like to think of it as Uh the combination the overlap between interests and Interests in In passion, so it's idea of in in talents, excuse me So it's what are you what what gets you excited? What are you interested in but also your talents? What are you good at like for me? I've just I've always been good at music I was able to pick up the ukulele almost immediately That's just something I've always been been good at magic tricks. I've always just ever since I was a kid I was able to Do magic tricks. It's just something that I'm good at. So When I when I went down this road, I realized oh magic tricks and personal growth and professional development That's that's my world. So it's taking what you already do well And what you're already interested in in putting it together To live a passion filled life. I see You have some more things. I love that you dug down into the purpose Oh, you're very welcome Karen. You're very welcome In cat shared spark joy. My frustration is that nothing seems to have that spark for me I enjoy things but nothing I get Passion about that's interesting cat. I didn't know that about you Hmm That would definitely be worth a conversation Yeah, I would love to talk talk talk with you more more about that, you know, just just as a friend uh absolutely Because I know you as a as a wonderful bright shining star Uh, so that's I'm fascinated That that spark uh, or that that that passion is Is elusive All right. Well in that. Oh my goodness that ties perf I just I just got got goosebumps because this ties perfectly into the last pillar of positivity We've talked about the first pillar mindset Your ability to gain new skills and new knowledge having an internal locus of control where you have influence over your experience of your circumstances As victor frankl says we can't control the circumstances But we can we can choose how we respond to them We talked about purpose We talked about the inner and outer purpose the seven questions to help us Balance these inner and outer purposes and also we we really doubled down on on on purpose on On mission of of identifying our talents and our interests and again, this is all just in an overview I encourage you to dive deeper Moving forward but relationships This is huge. I call this the failsafe I like to think of these pillars as uh Using a metaphor of a sailboat Our mindset is the boat itself So the mindset so so we get into the boat that keeps us afloat So we don't have to splash around and drown right it keeps us alive Purpose well that provides the sail Right, so that that provides direction for our lives that provides aim for us In relationships That's the wind for our sails So that's what keeps us moving forward Each of these pillars are important. We need the boat We need the sail and we need the wind. They're all working together But without the relationships, you know, it's like being stuck up a creek without a paddle Again, these are the relationships the valuable social support that helps pick us up During our times of trouble But they can also provide valuable social support to also celebrate when times are good Yes mindset boat purpose sail relationships win. Thank you very much cap So I am being cognizant of the time. So I'm going to go over The the four main directions of Relationships I like to think of of the relationships as a as a compass to keep with the with the sail theme, you know navigation relationships as a compass where if we think of east to west so if you were to draw a A compass on your paper a big circle with a line going straight through it from east to west That's our relationship with our peers so that's I'm just going to draw this out as a visual right so we have our relationship with our peers the straight line across These are people who Are similar to us. Maybe it might be the same age. It might be in the same job It might be people who grew up in the same town Our definition of peers can be very very fluid depending on the on the circumstances But there are people who can understand us in ways that whoever the outsiders are just just can't So then we also have if we go from the middle of the circle down We draw this out. So now we have a line going down south Those are our relationships with our followers with the people that we support the people that that we mentor the people who Uh Currently are where we used to be it's the people that we help build up so those are our our followers Next we have going north The line going north those are our leaders Going north that's our It's the people who mentor us. It's the people who have who currently are where we want to be They used to be where we are. They know the way They show the way and they go the way. So these are our leaders the people we look up to our role models I've been watching a lot of The old reruns of of gunsmoke lately. It's it's it's my thing and marshal matt dillon I don't know if if you if you folks have watched gunsmoke cat has. Oh my goodness talk about role model You know, he's you know, everyone wants to be marshal matt dillon. He does the right thing even when it's You know at his detriment Our leaders they could be people who we see every day could be Be celebrities that that that that that we look up to a lot of my mentors are people who write books So a lot of people who mentor me are people that I've never met before But it's through their words and their writings that I learned from them But remember I I said there are four directions here. There's our peers our followers our leaders the final direction Of relationships is right smack dab in the middle And that's our relationship with ourselves Our relationship with ourselves right smack dab in the middle And this is an important one in this also. Oh, oh, yes ben. Yes. I understand you you have to go Thank you so much for stopping in ben Pleasure to meet you So our our our relationship with with ourselves really ties back to Mindset it ties back to purpose It's about having an honest Assessment of of who we are our strengths Our weaknesses it's a lot about about humility in in humility gets also a bad rap just like positivity when we don't understand it Correctly humility isn't so much thinking less of ourselves or lowering our our stature But it's being honest with ourselves and with others about our strengths It's being honest with ourselves and others about our weaknesses It's about putting ourselves out there at the appropriate times, but also seeking help when we need the help So those are the four directions Of the relationship compass. So I encourage you now just jot down a few words Which which direction of of relationships are you strong in? If relationships are are your strengths, which direction is your strength? But also if it's your your weakness also think about which direction Could use some building up Maybe it's your relationship with yourself Maybe you don't have peers to turn to and confide in Maybe you've achieved a level of success, but you haven't taken time to mentor others Or maybe it's that you lack the wind in your sails because you don't have the mentors To lead the way Which direction could you use some help in? And before we wrap up This pillar on On relationships I have three questions That i'm going to share with you folks That can help build up our our relationship no matter the direction whether it's north south east west Or right smack dab in the center these three questions And and this is this is like you know you talk about gold, you know, you know, this is These are questions you're going to want to ask yourself and others every day the first question is That everyone wants to know these questions number one is do you care about me? We can't build a relationship with people that we simply don't care about So how do we demonstrate that we care if if we're asking this question of of other folks and if other people are unconsciously asking this of us whether they're aware of it or not People will want what want to know well. Do you care about what you generally care about me? number two Is can you help me? That's the other question and If if we can help and if we care then that also answers the care question because if we can help If we can provide care and we can provide help Then that is a way to to demonstrate care And and that that we can help so those are the first two questions and the last question Is the question that a lot of people jump to right away? Is trust do you can I trust you or do you trust me? and Oftentimes we we skip right over the care and we get to oh, this is how I can help Or we skip over the care and we say okay. How can you help me? But the question is Can you trust me or can I trust you? Being able to demonstrate these three questions answer them affirmatively and in demonstrate them authentically That is what's going to help us build stronger and higher value relationships And of course the answer to these questions will be different depending on who the person is depending on the context So I encourage you to really dive into those questions And with that in mind we've gone like 15 minutes over. So I I appreciate you folks really sticking with us on this cat Thank you so much for sticking all of these in the chat box Oh, and thank you for putting that the website in there as well hashtag positivity calm There are a slew of free resources up there articles videos podcast a slew of free resources that that also goes over All of these points as well So I encourage you if you're interested in these dive in look at What's available on the website on the resources tab? You'll be glad you did and if you have any any questions Feel free to reach out say hey. I was on your on your call And I'll be happy to answer any questions or Share anything else. So thank you so much. It's been a joy being with with you folks Now Jonas, can you also tell us how to find you other than the website? I believe you have a facebook page and maybe some other means of following hashtag positivity Yeah, so if you go on to linkedin i'm available there you can search for me under Jonas kane I also have a business page for hashtag positivity as well. So you can find both of those on linkedin There is facebook if you look for hashtag Positivity there is a facebook page. There's also a facebook group in the facebook group. It's a wonderful A community very very encouraging group So it's a great way to just maintain and stay anchored in a positive mindset instagram as well the official hashtag positivity Uh, we're on twitter hashtag positivity Sorry, oh, you know that is that is a good point. Uh, twitter only allows you so many characters So I don't think it is spelled out what i'm going to do is pop that into the chat box for you So, uh, it is spelled a little fun on the facebook and linkedin. Is it it's hashtag spelled out? Yes, it is cool All right, so thank you again Jonas for presenting today and kicking off the Reboot of net squared in adelaide. Thank you everyone for joining us today We are so pleased and delighted to have you here. We hope that you got a lot of value out of today's session I know I did and please absolutely feel free to reach out to Jonas if you have any Questions or would like to learn more about hashtag positivity Please make sure that you uh, join the adelaide Follow the adelaide net squared group. We have some amazing content coming up Next month it is going to be decision making with chris fern. So hopefully join us. Maybe you'll leave and join us back Because chris, uh, is also a friend. He's a mutual friend of Jonas's in mind So it'd be awesome to get the old gang back together And it's going to be really packed full of information chris has a really unique way of Looking at the world and approaching the decision making process and helping you understand how A lot of times we make decisions as if we are drunk And we don't even realize it because we have so much going on So I think you're going to find that to be a fascinating thing So ryan anything you'd like to add for the wrap up. No, I think that's a good wrap up Thanks very much for being first half of the rain Jonas Um, definitely very interesting. Um, and I hope you'll all join us for the next one in a month's time It was a joy All right. Thanks everybody