 So, first I would like to invoke the presence of the mother and Sri Aurobindo on this particular auspicious day that we are going to have on the birth of 175 birth anniversary of Sri Aurobindo and at the same time 75 years of India's independence. In fact, Sri Aurobindo's birth day also corresponds and connected with India's independence. So, we will have just few seconds of silence. Then good morning for this morning conversation, our presence and our contribution, our assessment of life, what that brought us in Auroville after long years of our continuous involvement in so-called the yoga or the yoga of the Sri Aurobindo and the mother. In fact, in my life what happened that I was from early age of life, little bit a person who used to have some abstract thinking what is life even in my classrooms. Teachers used to ask what is your goal in life. Then I normally used to say someone I want to be doctor, someone I want to be engineer, someone to be a politician. But normally I used to say that I don't know who am I. Teachers used to laugh also those days. But this was my evening, whenever evening and morning comes, I used to feel in the silence of the evening and morning that what is the purpose of coming here upon earth. So, this inspired me then when I joined Delhi University after my post-graduation, I did my young film there I had to put dissertation also and there I took dissertation as a meditation, a way of life. That was also interesting my friend asked me why you are so much interested in meditation and concentration. Then I just said that I had my own interest and I used to take yoga as a hobby or fun. This inspired me because in my college time I remember I had some back pain and I was going through some treatment in Patel chest we had in our campus but it was not working. So, I went to some place in some book shop and in the book shop someone gave me a book for free. That was Jain Juga perhaps it was by Yachar Tulsi. There it was in course of my reading that book I found that if you have a pain somewhere in the body, you concentrate on the space or the place of the part of the body where it is pain and you concentrate it will go. So, I put my concentration try to put my concentration a week or two after I find there was no pain. So, I think oh this is good that this concentration or one pointed net at a place it cure something or it has a power. So, this convinced me. Then in later part of my years I came across the book of Vivekananda Yoga, Raj Yoga that I find interesting. I started reading I was started practice, Heart Yoga, Raj Yoga, Meditation all that together. But this again I did not know that where it is taking me and where it will take me because in young college life of around 25 where our opportunities of life have a worldly life have a successful job these are before us. But most of the time I used to get involved in concentration, in meditation, in reading spiritual books. By that time I was not known to the mother and serial window. When I took up this subject my infill is finished then I took up this subject for PhD. Then two weeks time was given by our guide to search and find out a subject you go to the library and find a subject. Then again I was wondering I took one month then finally I selected the topic meditation a way to enlightenment. Although the guide was not happy they said what you are going to do after this in academic life in university you don't have anything that you can teach it is not introduced in India so far. But I said I have interest sir so I have my own interest and I cannot tell my friends and my family people that I want to go for my inner journey. And it would look very strange everything I am going mad so to cover up my own interest inner journey or self study I am just covering this because when I go somewhere and I am doing doctorate normally hardly people ask on what is your subject and even if they ask subject I say this is the subject my inner journey my inner interest my inner being searching for itself I wanted to cover it through outer skin of this topic it was my only goal. That is why even after I did my doctorate I got my degree in 1987 my search still continued not that after my degree I went for a job I was teaching also some places. So in fact 1983 when I took this subject of meditation a way to enlightenment that was a very year that changed my life. In fact in lunch time it was I remember also the day and date that was 9th March 1983 that I came after lunch I was living in a central institute of education hostel there was next to Miranda house very famous college women's college of India central part in Morishnagar that is called we call North campus. So after lunch I came and we had provided by research scholar EG chairs so we used to sit and meditate on that. So that particular day I sit and started sitting and feeling quietness of mind suddenly my attraction my concentration went to the heart center. So I don't know what is happening with that it was a sort of fun I was not knowing that it will take to spiritual life or anything else since it was a hobby I feel I used to feel quietness of mind I used to feel more creative when I used to do such things. So I went and tried to concentrate on my heart then I got frightened that I may go out of my body or something will happen that I was going I was going from secure to insecure so I withdraw myself but second time again it happened so I said it was so thrilling and exciting then I left it I thought let it be whatever happens. So then I got this one experience and I think one it was only one and only one very strong experience that I could see the oneness of the transcendental what you call universal and what you call individual. After that I became normal and after few days I forget all my this experience what had happened again worldly life same year after few months just in opposite of my room there was a friend my friend we normally used to go in winter for tea and coffee to his room he was from Odisha he was doing Amphil in chemistry so I went there in the morning just I pipped in his room and he was putting agarbatti to the one photograph on his table and he was putting agarbatti you are just I asked him to whom we are showing this agarbatti in sense stick he asked me to guess then I said maybe that time Nirmala Devi or Amritanand Devi or whatever I said they say you don't know the mother I said oh who is the mother then he asked me to sit down that Antarjami Sarange from Odisha he asked me to sit down and he started explaining about who is the mother who is Sri Aurobindo what is yoga at least half an hour I heard you very patiently and at that time I feeling I am looking for that whatever he says mind to super mind over mental consciousness all that little bit he briefed me and I felt that I am looking for that then out of my curiosity he introduced me to Dr. Kirit Joshi he was in those days perhaps chairman of the Vedic Sansthan it was in ITO Delhi near ITO Delhi ITO bus stand near Delhi so he took me there he had interview with a cameraman so he we were talking but he asked me to wait and then he explained all that whatever he was saying I think it was it was so much entering in me that I had a call for my professor in Bangkok in Delhi University and I was thinking what I do I was feeling that I don't know what I have to do then he asked me to come his house that Preetampura I used to live in Transjama one week it was a summer time I went continuously and he whole of the mother and Sri Aurobindo yoga he explained me I very patiently I used to ask I had no question to ask him but he explained all that after that the same my friend he introduced me to Delhi ashram Sri Aurobindo ashram Delhi branch he said come I will take you there then I went there 2-3 days then I felt that I should stay there in Delhi ashram for some time it was 1983 so one morning when I was walking in the Delhi University campus there is a Reese garden I was one book I was having on Vivekananda so one of the person one of the professor I can say now he was just crossing that and he was watching me for many days that I used to come even in winter and sit there and eat something and he was also a spiritual seeker in fact very much in depth a spiritual seeker and he asked me what are you doing so I said I am doing this research where are you staying then he said why don't you come and meet me in my office then I said sir I am Vice Chancellor R. N. Madhotra Vice Chancellor of the Delhi University I said ok sir I will meet you tomorrow but why I have to meet you he said I will give you a recommendation later then I said I am doing PhD I will give you recommendation later wherever you want to go you can have my later you will get all facility done so ok so next day I went and met him in his administrative building so then I thought where I have to show this later first so I went to Delhi branch I came to know that Tara is very strict in keeping people there so I showed my Vice Chancellor later I said Tara I have to stay here I am already coming here so I want to stay for a week for my research work then she said ok ok but how much you will pay every day I am just telling you all that because he was very strict in that so I said it is written that it is for free but why you are asking money she said no no atleast minimum you have to say something you have to write something in my application she said ok 15 rupees per day I will pay I was a research scholar also and I thought she will agree so she agreed then I started my thesis and all that there sitting for a week or two there one day I was going to the Relic center there is a canopy there is a Relic center there so I was waiting to go in a lotus shape so I wanted to go there and then I saw someone is there so I was waiting that when he will come back I will go so when he came back and he started patting on my shoulder how are you and then we I said I am in the university but what are you doing here it was quite young of 25 and 6 years what are you doing here in the ashram so I said I have come out this my research work I have some interest I did not disclose I never disclosed my interest deeper interest because people think and people ask me have you run away from the house so I had always reservation not to explain my in depth interest in that so just brief that I like this I am doing PhD and he took me up to the car and then he gave me his visiting car and he said in few days after it was Deepavali day so he called me you come to visit my house this is card and it was the card of Dr. Karan Singh so he said ok I heard your name so you come on Deepavali day we will meet so that year Deepavali day I went I think 2-3 years in Deepavali day I went to see him we had a long discussion before me I saw there was a Tibetan monk we are talking to him some spiritual gurus talking to him on Deepavali day he also called me come come and he took me in 2-3 rooms maybe hours he talked with me all that was my college days and hobby of searching a job so I was visiting all the deals for that so then in 1991 when he visited here first time perhaps he became chairman of Auroville foundation and he wrote me a letter that when I was walking in Auroville and Matri Mandir I felt divine consciousness penetrating through the earth atmosphere I said I remember you wrote me like that I hope it will be interesting for you I said oh I have to try this why he is writing me like this and before that when last meeting and all that I explained myself that my after this going to the Tara Ashram I mean New Delhi branch next later my bhai sansa Aryan Bhattotra gave me for visiting different monastery in Thailand so I went Bangkok university I went Bangkok and Bangkok there was some university there was one Bijayavankar university to that bhai sansa I gave me a letter gave me my bhai sansa and later he accommodated me there and he used to he asked me to teach also in post graduate student in Mahachala Bijayavankar university it was the center of the Bangkok it is near Sanam Luang area very big open space there so I was teaching all that I had shared to Dr. Skansing about this my experience so it was more exciting for me about that what I am doing so he asked me to come and visit there in 1991 and that time from Bombay I had got a job as a university professor so it was perhaps 11th August 1992 that I was going to Mumbai for joining this job so when I went to Lucknow I had to go to Lucknow and visit my one of my friend and he knew that I had gone already in 1984 to Sri Aurobindo Asalam and I liked visiting there I am in hall with mother and Sri Aurobindo Yoga my friend felt like that then he said why don't you go first to Pondicherry and then you have time you can join next month it was 11th August so I don't know how I will reach by 15th August to that Sunday so there was a train from Lucknow to Chinnai special train I called that I came that and perhaps 14th night I came here in 1992 and when I was here then it was I hold a guest I left I stayed there in the ashram that was the particular day I was talking about that after lunch from the dining hall I was just walking around the society beach of his not beach side but opposite side on the road so I saw the one bus standing and one of my friend Mahendra in fact I met him in Delhi ashram when he was doing PhD from Pune University so there we picked the friendship so when he saw me walking there he said where are you going I said I have just come after lunch and just I don't know sometime library also so said come come I have a 101 coconut and we have to offer to Ganesha which Ganesha where Ganesha then he said there is a Ganesh temple in Auroville on old by pass the bus is going and mother Ilya he used to call Ilya as a mother Ilya so mother Ilya is also going so I said ok I went into this bus 1992 31st August was the Ganesh puja day so that day I came here and lot of bhajan and kirtan was going on there so Ilya introduced me Bhaga Judith and many others but Judith invited me why don't you come to Auroville so when he said why don't tomorrow so I said ok I will try so when I thought how to go and stay in Auroville then Madan Lal perhaps Madan Lal Himach Singh I met him somewhere on the way so I asked that how can I stay in Auroville then he said there is a guest house in Bharat Nibbaz a student guest house so I tried and it worked so on 1st September 1992 he came here in Bharat Nibbaz there is a student guest house and I was just walking here and there here and there at those moment of life I had a sort of strong feeling like that sometime people write spirituality says like a dry leaf carried away by wind so I thought if I have to become Aurovillean I will become Bhajan so one week I passed like that so one day when I was in sire building just walking around seeing the offices so those guest financial service sire all were in Bharat Nibbaz building in 1992 so when I was just walking around I saw Judith surrounded with some people on her table so as soon as she saw me she was from the chair oh you are here come I will introduce you so he took me to Bhanitabha there so introduced after I say we will see later after whatever happens so that life followed like that and then I remember it was very important there I used to go in a chamber whenever I came here and I was staying here perhaps in a chamber was inaugurated in 1991 and I came here 1992 I was very much fond of going to in a chamber so one day I thought Bhanitabha was there on the gate normally we were guest suppose to be I was a guest so normally we are not allowed to go to in a chamber but that day particularly Bhanitabha was there on the gate so I asked Bhanitabha you I am here and I am got introduced you can you allow me to go to in a chamber yes you go so I went in a chamber I had a Pondicherry ashram the solar bag with me and there was one perhaps Mahendra had given me pocket edition of Savitri so that was that I went in a chamber and when I was coming back I sat down under banyan tree and I was just thinking what to do now so I was skipping there so suddenly my hand went to the bag and I saw the book and opened the book I started reading Savitri then it came to me that I have to read loudly that is not in my habit and nature till now also don't read loudly but it was coming so strong that I could not resist it so I started reading loudly and I was conscious that this banyan tree is a silent zone I should not read loudly but I could not resist so a particular day that had a future meaning so that particular day I did this so just around that was in Mahatri Mandir Lachmin Narayan was working his hut was just nearby so he heard me reading and with a strong loud voice so why don't we sit here in every Sunday here under Mahatri Mandir once you can sit just like it came so on Sunday we started sitting under banyan tree perhaps you must have one photograph in Savitri Bhavan website and many places you are having under banyan tree we were 5-6 people were reading myself Mahendra was there Lachmin Narayan was there it is photographed I don't know who photographed it it went there like that when it rains then we goes to nearby Lachmin Narayan hut and read there no idea just it was a sort of hobby so then that time Suresh Day came as a secretary of Auroville foundation Suresh is joined as a secretary of Auroville foundation I had met him ashram before when he was posted in Udisha through one Babaji was there from Udisha perhaps he introduced me that he is like this so little bit little bit introduction we are there so perhaps he wanted and he knew that someone is reading under banyan tree perhaps he felt I am reading that so he called me at my house on land line so I said why he is calling me so can you come and why not we eat together with more Aurovilians in CIC building in Bharat Nevas I said sir this is very good idea why not from there we shifted every 10 to 12 30 or 10 30 to 12 in CIC sometime CIC building sometime secretary of evolution building but at 10 o'clock Sundaram that was the building he charged he had normally forget to open the building so we had to run for him and moreover in 2-3 month time the people were so much Aurovilians were there but the room was so small people used to stand outside I mean under the wall standing around so crowded it was so crowded liberty of evolution and that place so we felt we must have a place then Malika was those with me Malika was those with me in that movement that I call now it is that came from my loud voice like me another one sharing with me and those days I was having my breakfast lunch and dinner in matri mandir itself there was a very old refrigerator here there this old paratha I saw in the news I was so sad but it was there refrigerator it used to have that so we had I had already feeling about that of matri mandir and when from there it came to search for the land for sabitri a study circle it was named sabitri a study circle so there Suresh they say no now it will be sabitri bhavan he gave the name bhavan bhavan means where the god and god he says leave I said sir I agree with you then I started searching because there was also some request or demand from Aurovilians due to some reasons that long number and large number of people were Aurovilians were gathering around security of Auroville foundation you can say so there was some reason behind so and reading interest also so there are so many people and then we have started searching then Suresh they managed to get this land then I marked this land then Sadhaman and Helmut all letters they joined and this place started happening and this has come up to now this place and I am taking some classes from the very beginning like from the first building reading room that we call cultivating concentration yoga and the evolution of man such type of classes I started taking so in course of my journey from ashram to Auroville and connected to Delhi I remember when I used to sing little long time long hours in ashram meditation hall Tara used to come and whisper me your hair will go grey last time I met her I reminded that I have no more like that I am not sitting so long I am in Auroville now so there was a habit that long hours and long minutes I can sit like that for nothing I can say so then this place started I got involved in this I am doing all type of thing here in fact now in 1993 when my friend asked me, introduced me mother and said I will go then that experience of my particular day in my hostel room I forget completely but suddenly when I came here in 1990 to 1992 all my experience came back to memory as it was that day so then I started reflecting and whenever I read mother and said a book that it is not a teaching it is not a revelation it is a direct action so I said oh it is really a direct action I was not involved as a professor or a teacher reading a book it was certainly a direct action that like a bird in a hands of a hunter I tried my do for worldly life I too do my best settle job having life in material world but I was not allowed I was forced to have this life and then I whenever I started reading about his ascending and descending then I understood that what he means by his own experience of writing that and that is why he said even he said and for or will he say the first necessity is inner discovery the first necessity is the inner discovery he says because first inverse first is needed inner discovery because in ascending at the end of the ascending at the peak of ascending there we meet the transcendental that he called involution anyone of us involution is there so at the end for the human being at the end one has to get connected then only descending is possible otherwise to whom you will descend you will ascend to the nature and descend to the nature no he is saying that you ascend he climbed out else consciousness that he is calling soul, psychic parmatma or that he is calling involution out of what this world has been created and he is present everywhere in omnipresent omnipresent so this sort of involution or evolution when it started coming ascending and descending it related that came across lot of literature to me and of the mother and what she was saying and when I read this in Savitri that Satyavan must die there is a place he writes Satyavan must die then I was thinking that what is the purpose why first he wrote Savitri as a symbol and a legend and then he writes it is of course even Satyavan must die means he was meaning a soul descended in false and ignorance that must die so he so I felt in that context and in that context of Auroville mother always gave emphasis of inner journey there is a he says always divine in presence divine is present in our heart waiting to be discovered so all the time unless we don't have to discover our own self we can say if we don't involve God or anyone or divine we can say unless we don't find our true self we cannot talk of transformation at all because transformation needs more than one thing one thing cannot transform for transforming something you need another thing to transform one is get transform one is transformer one is our mind our vital our physical must find something other than this that he is calling involution that is called divine find that and that will transform this not nature will transform to nature but person will transform this nature that is why also in Savitri in finding of the soul he says he pitched the tent in the dejected land when he says he pitched the tent in the dejected land he is meaning the same person same human being when he crossed the limit of the nature that is called he got liberated he attained to the pursa that it says size of a thumb sitting in our heart that is also he is saying in the same finding that the soul can do that it is a size of a thumb sitting in each one of us and that is a secret cave secret caves we have to go through so unless we don't reach that unless we don't find that that is that existence is in us and within us the transformation of our lower nature is not possible or if we transform it is a just transformation of our nature lower nature by higher nature that lower nature by higher nature means that same impermanence same law of dependent origination the same immortal it will not go that our Upanishadic cry was there asatoma, sajgamya tamso, majyudirgamya mirtyu, amritam gamya that untruth darkness and mortal we know here we are identified we don't know what is light we don't know we don't know what is truth we don't know what is light we don't know what is immortality but those who experience this all other side they say that we have capacity it is imbibe and us to uplift ourselves from to sath tamas jyoti and from mortal to immortal and since we are living in this side asat side darkness side and mortal it is side since we have no experience of that we have taken this as a ignorance as a bliss we have taken this as all there is nothing else we encounter that then only what I am and what I should be here the question Sri Aurobindo is explaining from his own yogic experience that in a very in one statement it is very powerful normally I say in my classes to explain all of his yoga is that that he says animal was elaborately in which man was worked out man by his conscious effort and cooperation nature will to work out superman or shall we say to manifest god now he is saying last shall we say to manifest god it means not manifestation of nature in nature manifestation of god which is other nature that should come then only mind can climb to some another horizon that is called super mind other places he write there is a being beyond being of mind he is pointing that the mind is not the last and in other system of human nature as a individual as a universal as a transcendental it is imbibed in us it is with us without that we don't exist we don't exist without that that is why in all yoga science even serendu and mother yoga is more strong about this they say ahamkar we say ayi in Sanskrit word that is why it is called verse or the language of the devas because it has come directly the truth translated transformed for expression directly in Sanskrit it is very having consciousness written language so that language says in english in all that we are not able to understand exact meaning that she says here I am referring to what is divine consciousness or a will is a very much now we are talking about willings of the divine consciousness but we are confused we are we are willing of servitor of the ego consciousness or divine consciousness what is the difference how can we know it is we are servitor of ego consciousness or we are servitor of the divine consciousness unless we don't know divine how can we say I am willing to the divine consciousness so how come I know and why I do not know so the word Sanskrit very beautiful word it is called aham that make construction of I in Sanskrit it is a thwam you it is vayam we I you and we this is a mode of nature this created I this is cut off from the infinite cut off from the source that is talking about evolution that is talking about divine consciousness so divine consciousness is blended in our ego consciousness we are not open to that since we are not open to that we can give any name of our ego consciousness our that is why even mother had written in detail that vital desires name and fame position we should keep away from that because it will stop you from going towards mind to super mind or from mental consciousness to divine consciousness and when divine consciousness when you are willing servitor to the divine consciousness there is everywhere all of the literature most of the literature their mother also said even though also they explained what will be the nature if we open our horizon from the ego consciousness to the divine consciousness he says you will be quite you will spread yourself quite everywhere wherever you will go you will know you will you will you will don't have any complaints because when you are in divine consciousness you are unified with two opposites there he says all control is create harmony so where is the problem where I say I am right and you are wrong if I am saying I am right you are wrong it means we are out of the divine consciousness we are not the willing servitor of the divine consciousness this is what I have understood is my personal understanding of that and then we go name and form the worldly way it goes the worldly way this that I said the last word how since we do not know the concept that is why people say it is easy to find wealth money but difficult find to God or people say it is difficult to find God than to find money or find money difficult to find God because we human being are only busy with the material material and material world material universe is a form it is just a densified form in fact perhaps you recently might have read the poem who it is he who is in the sun ageless and deathless it is he who in the sun ageless and deathless even he talks the source of the sun this sun as you and son we have it has a age it is not deathless because one day it will dissolve it will be withdrawn to a consciousness what we call transcendental resource consciousness abyak consciousness it will be drawn but he is saying but he is present there immortal it means he is everywhere omnipresent and omniscient every way even to us what we call devotees or follower of the mother and say they always guided us that we have to look our immediate goal in Sadhana we have to progress in Sadhana we don't have to see what result it will become and then I will become big man we don't have to see that this is very natural consequences if you are get into somewhere if you are really invite me that if you are connected individual with the omnipresent or the omniscient or omnipresent potent it is automatic in your system that will create greatness in you but you don't watch every day whether I am becoming great or not I am going inner chamber every day I am going to samadhi every day 10th of a scale of my progress we don't have to see that what we have to see that the immediate effort our what we have we have to do that we have to concentrate on that the other scenes in fact in Sadhana yoga and the mother that is most important even for Auroville she says before coming to Auroville one must discover their soul their psychic because this is the preparatory thing that has to manifest but we are here trying to go to find it also and we are trying to manifest it also we are not ready for that in one verse I think which is very much popular that I am taking classes of the commentary of the Dhammapal by the mother it was in French related in English there is one Yamaabhagya where mother writes that what our ego is and how how our ego becomes all embracing ego all embracing individual which is widening itself of the widest has still include Ines but that Ines is not my Ines divine Ines or truth Ines there she says how to behave in this life in Yamaabhagya there is a verse very detail he explains that is in Pali verse that is in Pali it is written and it is says he says he says enmity is not work doubt enmity is not dissolved by greater enmity enmity is removed by only love and compassion and this is law eternal this is the law eternal he says so in his yoga we should not confuse of somehow like Krishna that Arjuna is calling and you have to fight a battle that is why in parable of avatar Sri Aurobindo writes in last verse Buddha went into the negation and as a quality he will have positive life so in one way we are confused even we all are confused I was also very much confused until we did not know mother and Sri Aurobindo and there enlightened yoga I was also wanting in our traditional yoga and most of us because what it was ready with us we found it we worked out but when new thing is coming up we are working for that and we have to we must go out there and in the very beginning I said we are just the instrument when we look back no one of us can choose our life so called divine life we can't choose because we are human being egoistic man we can choose that and moreover that thing we have no idea we have no administrative officer become politician we can choose make our goal like that but the things we don't know what is divine or what is divine causes us how can we choose that so that is why he says that those who are us those who have chosen that life we have been already chosen but this is revealed to us in a very later stage of our advance when we see where we are somewhere standing in the divine consciousness and brightened by that in the another verse is also saying that explain our day to day life that spiritual seeker we claim in the same Brahmapada he says how we have to behave in the life or society he says there is another verse in Pali he is saying that as the bee sucks the flower but does not damage its color its fragrance its beauty and out of that he stores the honey in the same way the wise man should walk in the universe this is what the mother translated about in Brahmapada in this world we have to and in fact those people who are willing servitor of the divine consciousness they are aspirant of the divine consciousness their nature becomes from very beginning like that because it is not a one day event it is all destined it is all set in the system of a person and that has to grow one day so living in Auroville for last I mean 30 years I am very quiet I am very humble I mean I have no idea of anything what is happening and even if I try to tell something hardly our words catch people because that is why perhaps I can say it in my understanding in my understanding that mother also writes that the adventure of consciousness all for the adventure of the consciousness even somebody in jail someone is on mountain someone is in isolated place outside world has nothing to do for that it is adventure it is a development it you know progress in our self in our consciousness if we remember our yogis, munich you know they were in the mountains and it was the cave and his body it was the cave and his body no power position no outer influence no administration, no politician but they have got enlightenment we have got enlightenment under the bozhi tree in open space there was no thing no one came to help him he was starving he was begotting food even with mother even most of the great man is like that so if our goal, our intention our one pointed attraction has become something to climb that if it is in our being to go from mind to something else if something is there and we have to believe that mind brings property maybe beyond going mind what will bring we don't know we may bring the whole property of the whole earth that is why it was called spiritual life a king without crown some wrath but we have no understanding we have no experience and we are running in the darkness and at the same time we are not accepting our ignorance that is another problem with us human being that what we are what we think this is all that is why mother says if you enter into the divine consciousness or if the divine is with you you will be humble you will be plastic you will be flexible you will be transparent all that quality will come to you automatically you don't have to announce so these are the words I think enough I have told myself I hardly I am very much involved in or will activities although in Kerala Jyoti or sometime I worked in or will at many places not only one in council I was there it was deputy council then I was in CC then I was in Seva also labour work there I was also visual village action group also in new creation when I came I was teaching English there so I was also I founded also the night watchman also in we were patrolling ourselves for villains I worked in many place but this place that it came to me and I remember the particular day when I was shouting and when I look back oh that was the day a movement of Savitri has been created and when Nidozbaran came and he said on the inauguration of the first building he said Matri Mandir and Savitri Bhavan are twins that went to my ear turret I said oh oh there was the connection it was that there she is silent, majestic here she shares with us here we help each other through our activities so I think this morning I have taken you a lot of time it is 11.20 I can talk long long if we are involved in such things and since it is my habit to have in classes so nice but I have no I know my people my friends are very high important officials when I feel like when I meet them of course they think I am very small baby with them but when I stay longer with them I smile I laugh I say oh my god what you got oh right so there we are happy at least something we have got to be happy in all circumstances by gift of this Auroville and the ashram and the motherland so thank you dear 11.23 now I got the eyes to say something yeah please