 Amen. So keep your place there in Genesis chapter 18. That's going to be our core verse for the sermon this morning. So both tonight or I'm sorry this morning and tonight and we're going to be studying kind of the idea of fatherhood and you know how what the Bible says about these things this morning and we're going to do that through a couple of different series that I've been in in the past and this morning we're going to do a sermon in the how stuff works sermon series. So the how stuff works sermon series is you know just basically talking about what the Bible says about how things are. The interesting thing and one of the reasons I started this sermon series is because the Bible you know the thing about the Bible is you don't have to believe in the Bible, you don't have to be a Christian, you don't have to be saved in order for the Bible to be real and true and things to work that way and that's really what I'm going to show you a really good example of this morning. You know example I mean just the base core gospel example is heaven and hell are real whether you think that they are or not whether somebody thinks heaven and hell is real they're they're real and they everyone will find this out one day. So you know with everything though even not just the gospel and salvation everything in the Bible even to the core details of of how men should be how women should be how children should be the structure of the family the bottom line is the way the Bible lays things out this is how it's going to work this is how it works whether you follow it or not and I'm going to show you this morning how it's just proven that it works this way whether or not people believe it or not so I mean the idea is with everything that the Bible talks about from salvation to every manner of life we we should just get with the program I mean things are going to go better for us if we just get with God's program even how nations even how nations work and how nations you know end up it's like look if you go this way it's going to go well for you if not this is what's going to happen it's really amazing that that man and nations and leaders keep repeating the same things over and over when it's all laid out in the Bible this is how it works the Bible works whether we like it or not whether we believe it or not so this morning on Father's Day I want to give a sermon and look at what the Bible says about how fatherhood works how fatherhood works so we're going to look at you know what the Bible says about fatherhood and just I'm going to show you from just secular studies and research that everybody knows about I'll give you some shocking statistics this morning that basically prove that this is how father would fatherhood works whether you believe it or not whether you follow it or not it works this way so let's get into it look at Genesis chapter 18 so here in Genesis chapter 18 God and two angels are on their way to destroy Sodom and Gomorrah they stop and they visit Abraham and the context of this conversation is you know should God tell him you know God is saying should I tell Abraham what I'm about to do what I'm going to go do and that's where we get into discussion where Abraham is is talking about well you know there could be righteous people there and they go from 50 down to you know 10 right but look at verse number 17 this is what God says about Abraham and this is very telling this is a very good few verses right here about what a father's role is all right and look what God says here in verse 17 it says and the Lord said shall I hide from Abraham that thing which I do saying should I go tell him what I'm about to go do to Sodom and Gomorrah seeing that Abraham surely shall shall surely become a great and mighty nation and all the nations of the earth shall be blessed in him for I know him and he's saying why is that going to happen why is verse 18 going to happen and he's saying four this is why it's going to happen in verse number 19 and you're going to keep your place in Genesis 18 throughout the sermon because we're going to come back to these verses at the very end of the sermon so you're going to bookmark this place but he says this is why verse 18 is going to happen this is why he'll be a great and mighty nation and all the earth shall be blessed in him for I know him that he will command his children and his household after him and they shall keep the way of the Lord to do justice and judgment that the Lord may bring upon Abraham that which he had spoken of him so the Bible says something very telling about Abraham here in verse number 19 the Bible says that because of what he does in verse number 19 these good things are going to happen to him what are those good things look at verse number 19 look at this word that he says in verse number 19 he says that Abraham will command his children and his household this is showing us you know what the man's job is what the father's job is in the family is to command his children and his household he is to command his household look he is to lead the way is what the Bible here and it's not using a slight word here it's not using a neutral word it says he is to command it today this is you know we're trying to erase this today and there's something that I keep hearing that just keeps irritating the living daylights out of me this idea and this term of co-parenting today and I just keep hearing this just like it's becoming like a common term today this co-parenting you say what in the world is co-parenting well shouldn't there be two parents well yeah you know it kind of sounds okay at first until you realize like what it is all right look at I'm just going to read you um a couple definitions of what co-parenting is and then we're going to go back to the Bible so here's a definition I think I don't know if this is from Wikipedia or where it is but just like a definition of co-parenting co-parenting is an enterprise undertaken by parents who together take on the socialization care and upbringing of children from whom they share equal responsibility like that sounds pretty good right that's wrong right there you got to be careful with this word equality today they all everyone's equal today no not everyone's equal and the Bible says that the man as far as his responsibility in the family and raising the children he does not have an equal responsibility let me continue married and co-habitation parents use this term okay meaning married parents and parents that are just living in fornication literally having children together which is also a very common thing today all right we'll talk more about that tonight it says children benefit from more co-parenting but the amount of co-parenting varies between couples so it's saying the more co-parenting you have the better okay of this equal parenting it says this certain study has found that the level of collaborative co-parenting was higher among listen to this was higher among unmarried co-habitation parents and among those who married in response to pregnancy compared to married couples that become pregnant during marriage it's saying co-parenting is literally more common today in parents that aren't even married or parents that got married because of a pregnancy it's saying like this co-parenting sounds like i don't want to have anything to do with co-parenting now it gets weird okay it says in a shared earning slash parenting parenting marriage see this is really what co-parenting is co-parenting is there's a shared earning and parenting responsibility between both it's equal it's like it's like both people are everything is what it's saying okay it says in this type of marriage where there's a shared earning and shared parenting marriage child care is divided equally or approximately equally between the two parents in a parenting marriage the parents live and raise their children together in a purpose-based marriage without physical intimacy or expectation to share mutual romantic love you're like what in the world i mean what what is this is this idea of co-parenting i just i read you these weird things so you just understand that it is it is a complete rejection of the bible that that's what this is and that's what all of this stuff is they're trying to take the man's role into some neutral status and take the woman's role up into some neutral status so neither man or woman is anything different or any it's it's literally equal but that is not what the bible teaches the father is the leader the bible teaches it is not equal and here's the thing things it's it's not equal things that are different are not the same a does not equal two two is not five i mean things that are different are not the same look both are important this is not saying that mothers don't have value i mean we know the value of mothers but it's saying there are different roles there are different specific roles in the bible and the father is to be the leader the commander of the family and his household he has to be the leader of his wife and the leader of his children that's what that is saying he will command his children and his household after him this is what god is saying he's like this is why he will be a great nation because he will do this it sounds like the opposite of a weak leader if you look at the wording of this he sets the rules he sets the direction and look back look back at those verses if you will verse number 19 he sets the rules he sets the direction he sets he leads the way in everything is what the bible is saying that abraham will do and a father should do you say how in what way look at this and they shall in what way in his own way he would just make up whatever he wants no he will command this he will command the way of the lord is the way that he will command he will command god's way god gives us a way and it is up to the man to command his household in that way that's what the bible is saying that abraham will do and this is why he will be a great nation now you say what if we just erase this what if we just erase this idea of the father commanding his household and we go into co-parenting and we go into everybody's this neutral status and it's just going to be you know here's how we're going to run this household we'll have a test case and we'll collaborate on everything and we won't have this strong you know this strong leader in the household well look this idea that there's no leader in a household is a major growing problem today it is a major growing problem society says society says today it doesn't matter if the man fills this role or the woman fills this role that's what society is trying to teach us today is it doesn't matter who fills whatever role all roles can be the same we don't need this biblical role that's what society is trying to tell us today all right that men and women are equal men and women are not equal that doesn't mean that they don't have value but they're not equal things that are different are not the same look i'm going to read you some shock statistics here and here's the funny thing about this as society is pushing this narrative that we don't need this father figure to leave the home to command the home well you wouldn't find too many people use that wording today we don't need the father to command the home look at statistics that literally everybody knows these are so common i'm not even i mean you can find these stats in these studies everywhere and the ones i'm going to read to you they're from you know they're from oh they're from far right wing uh conservative uh information centers like npr like the department of corrections like the census bureau i mean these these are just these are such obvious things that are happening as a whole in our society that literally no one can deny them literally study after study after study is showing this so we're trying to erase what the bible is saying but what society is finding out is that it works this way it works this way whether we follow it or not like i said that's the whole point of this sermon series how stuff works it's like this is how things work the bible is telling us we might as well get with the program because if we don't here's some shockers for you here's some shockers some statistical facts and look notice notice how when i read these stats to you this doesn't have anything to do with whether you're christian it doesn't have anything to do with whether you're muslim it doesn't have anything to do with whether you're atheist it doesn't have anything to do with what background what your beliefs are whether you believe one word of the bible or not it's just how it works why can't we learn why can't we figure this out i'm going to read you some stats number one 85 percent of youth i've heard this one for 20 some years i read books before i had kids i want to read a bunch of books and figure out like how to not be a bad parent you know so how to how to be a good father 85 percent of youth i've heard this go from anywhere from 85 to 95 i've heard different numbers but it's like pretty much everyone 85 percent of youth who are currently in prison grew up in a fatherless home another stat that i've heard is is that the vast majority 90 95 percent of of prisoners in prison hate their father fatherless home different different wording of the same type of stat number two seven out of every 10 youth that are housed in state operated correctional facilities including detention and residential treatment come from a fatherless home department of justice department of corrections number three 39 percent and when i read these stats you think about these stats and you think if you're gonna you're gonna draw some logical conclusions here and that's okay use your head i mean encourage we should encourage more people in this country to use their head 39 percent of students in the united states from the first grade to their senior year of high school do not have a father at home that's almost 40 percent four and ten of kids right now today in school don't have a father at home children without a father without a father at home are four times more likely to be living in poverty than children with a father so 40 percent of kids are four times more likely to be living in poverty than children with a father at home number four children from fatherless homes are twice as likely to drop out from school before graduating than children who have a father in their lives number five 24.7 million children in the united states live in a home where their biological father is not present that equates to one in every three children in the united states not having access to their father number six remember this one as we're coming back to it girls who live in fatherless homes have a hundred percent higher risk suffering from obesity than girls who have a father present teen girls from fatherless homes are also four times more likely to become mothers before the age of 20 we're gonna talk a lot about daughters and and and fathers here in just a few minutes but notice that notice that a hundred percent higher risk means double the chance basically okay stat seven in 2011 44 percent of children in homes headed by a single mother were living in poverty almost half of single mother homes are living in poverty just 12 percent of children in married couple families were living in poverty i mean that's that should wait that should tell us something right there number eight children who live in a single parent home are more than two times more likely to commit suicide than children in a two-parent home number nine 72 of americans believe that a fatherless home is the most significant social problem and family problem that is facing their country that gives me a little bit of hope number 10 68 percent of children will spend their entire childhood with an intact family only 68 percent of children will spend their entire childhood with a mother and father in the home is what that is saying number 11 living in a fatherless home is a contributing factors of substance abuse with children from such homes accounting for 75 percent of adolescent patients being treated in substance abuse centers drug abuse alcohol abuse fatherless home i mean whenever you get to that point of like 75 85 percent you can say like hey we found it hey we found you know the causing factor here look at this one 85 percent of all children which exhibits some type of behavioral disorder come from a fatherless home us department of justice here's another one 13 90 percent of youth in the united states who decide to run away from home or become homeless for any reason originally come from a fatherless home hey found it verse four uh not verse 14 item for uh stat 14 60 63 of youth suicides involve a child who is living in a fatherless home 15 children who live in a single parent or step family home report less school monitoring less social supervision and lower educational expectations than children who come from two-parent homes 16 when the poverty levels are equal children who come from a two-parent home outperform children from a one-parent home 17 a recent study by richard reeves and kimberley howard finds that parenting skills across demographic groups now i didn't go and look at what these demographic groups are it means like you know race groups or whatever you know which i don't really care about it says parenting skills across demographic groups and found that 44 percent of single mothers fall into the weakest category and only three percent into the strongest category meaning only three percent of single mothers fell into the strongest demographic group while 44 percent fell into the weakest demographic groups we'll get number 18 about 40 percent of children in the united states are born to mothers who are not married that's that's shocking right there meaning there's almost one out of two almost half the children in the united states right now is so whenever we talk about that people aren't getting married anymore it doesn't mean they're not having kids anymore so almost half the kids in the united states today that are born their parents aren't married over 60 percent of these children were born to mothers who were under the age of 30 now wait a minute remember number six remember number six let me reread for you number six it says teen girls so it's basically saying 60 percent of these children are born to mothers under the age of 30 young single mothers item six was this teen girls from fatherless homes are four times more likely to become mothers before the age of 20 what's the common denominator here it's a fatherless home you know what the you know what these stats are telling us these stats are telling us that fatherless daughters beget fatherless sons and daughters that's what this is saying if you put these things together look much is made of males without fathers and we'll talk about that in a few minutes but fathers and daughters this is super important because these these social studies that have nothing to do with the bible nothing to do with god's truth are telling us this they're telling us that fatherless homes create fatherless homes and you just take that one tiny step further fatherless homes create single mothers that's what studies are showing us here you say why is that isn't that in the bible somewhere you would think that would be in the bible somewhere turn to numbers chapter 30 turn to numbers chapter 30 the bible covers this the bible talks about this about this connection between a father and his daughter look at numbers chapter 30 and i want to read this for you and i want to explain to you how this works this morning because this works whether you think it works or not this works whether you've read this page or not this works even these studies are showing us that this is how it works look at numbers chapter 30 and look at verse number two talking about the relationship between a father and his daughter in numbers chapter 30 in verse number two and we're using the example here of a vow that a daughter has made okay it says if a man vow a vow unto the lord or swear an oath to bind his soul with a bond he shall not break his word he shall do according to all that preceded thought of his mouth it's saying if a man promises something and vows a vow he owes it that's it that's why jesus says hey don't take oaths he's like just say what you'll do and do what you'll say you know and you know don't promise things you're not going to do jesus saying just how let your yabba and your nabinae because if you vow a vow you owe it as a man but the woman has protection the woman has someone looking out for her look at this it says as a woman also vow a vow unto the lord and this will show you look this will also show you how much god values women this will show you how much god values young ladies how he is look god has literally provided protection for for ladies from the time they are young to the time that they are old he has provided this protection because look he knows they're weaker he knows they're more vulnerable so he has put in place protection for them and it works this way whether we like it or not we might as well follow the bible look at verse number three of a woman also vow a vow now it's the rules are different here vow vow unto the lord and bind herself by a bond being in her father's house in her youth so he gets very specific directions of a young lady who's still living with her parents and her father is there it says her father hear her vow and her bond wherewith she had she had bound her soul and her father shall hold his peace at her then all her vows shall stand and every bond wherewith she had bound her soul shall stand and saying if she goes and she makes a promise or she vows something and her it has to go through her father first why because he is there to protect her he is there to make sure that she is not taken advantage of make sure that she is not out there listening to somebody and making foolish promises getting manipulated by somebody who's saying hey you should come over here and do this or whatever it's like your father will will will go through those vows and he will say no and she is not bound at all because her father is there her father is put in place as a protector for her look at verse number five but if her father disallow her in the day he heareth not any of her vows or her bonds wherewith she shall be bound her soul shall stand it's like they're just voided he has veto power and the lord shall forgive her because her father disallowed her this isn't about like who's better I mean are you crazy are you listening this this is about protecting the weaker vessel this is about protecting the daughter in this in this wicked nightmare of a world out here that will destroy anything where satan's operating freely out here what's the first thing getting destroyed it's the women and the children out here but here the father is to protect his daughter this is his duty the bible is saying look at verse six oh but what happens when you know she she's no longer living with her father look at this and if she had an all-in husband when she vowed or uttered out of her lips where was she bound her soul and her husband heard it and held his peace at her in the day that he had heard it then her vow shall stand and her bounds where was she bound her soul shall stand now it's it the duty passes to the husband why why does the duty pass to the husband because because god wants to make sure that these ladies are protected for their entire life that's why god wants to make sure that these weaker vessels are protected throughout their life the philosophy look the philosophy is is a philosophy of protection is the philosophy here and it passes there is a seamless transition there is a seamless transition from a young lady whose father is protecting her and then she gets married and she is protected then by her husband but the point is the man is responsible for the protection of the daughter the man is responsible for the protect protection of the young lady her dad protects her look this is Ephesians this is this is part of the nurture and admonition of the lord in Ephesians chapter six and verse number four the nurture of our daughters is this protecting feature that a father has this idea that you know he will protect her he will nurture her in the lord and she will be protected from any evil anything that is going to try to harm her which there's plenty that's trying to harm our daughters out there today there's plenty of wicked philosophies and wicked people that would just love to harm young ladies today we'll talk more about that tonight but the point I'm trying to get you to understand is this is the value of a father's relationship with his daughter a young lady with this nurture with this protecting person in place whether it be her father and then her husband she will not go looking for things and go looking for affection and looking for this protection in the wrong places because just as it's our role to protect it is it is that young ladies it's wired in her to be protected it's wired in her to want to be protected and look for someone that is going to give that nurture to her a young lady with a strong protective a strong father that is commanding his household commanding his children she will not go looking for the wrong type of male affection that's what the Bible is telling us here she will not and look what those studies told us she will not end up in fornication she will not end up a single mother this is how it works she will not end up in these terrible situations because she was protected and nurtured and that is the father's role that is not the mother's role to be that protector that is the father's role so a nurturing father commanding commanding his household in the way of the Lord will protect his daughter will protect his daughter he will he will deliver and then he will deliver his daughter into the arms of a loving husband that will then protect her the same way he did here's here's more here's another interesting thing that everybody knows there's another interesting thing that everybody knows you say wow the bible sounds pretty smart but here's the thing everybody knows this so why are they teaching all this anti-father stuff today when all these studies are these people eat it no it's satanic it is definitely a spiritual war folks because there's no other reason that all this information like all these shock statistics that i told you this morning and then this common knowledge that i'm about to read you there is no other reason that people would just ignore it if it wasn't a spiritual battle here's some more common stats when it comes to picking a partner different people seek different attributes some look first and you can find this i'm not going to read the source because you can find this data almost everywhere if you google this you will come up with so many results you will not be able to read them in five hours when it comes to picking a partner i hate that word too different people seek different attributes some look for specific physical attributes say height skin color weight some go for temperament or emotional qualities while others especially women simply look for their fathers translation women marry someone like their dad here's another quote from another study studies show that a lot of women end up dating or getting married to men who have certain recognizable similarities with their fathers well this often happens in a subconscious level no one goes around comparing their potential you know husband against their father's personality attributes these women end up settling with men who are in one way or another who at one way or another resemble their fathers from the new scientist here's another another addition onto this it says women tend to choose husbands who look like their fathers even if they're adopted reveals a new study the point is this young ladies the vast majority marry someone like their dad good or bad good or bad abusive father someone that's just you know they they marry that same type of person i'm sorry but that's how it works that's how it works that's how important the father's role is this is why this is why this is why the bible is telling us in genesis 1819 that abraham he will command his family the bible says that the man should be strong be strong he say what what what do you mean be strong it means be physically strong be emotionally strong and be spiritually strong it means be strong and guess what this is why young ladies that have a strong father that is the numbers chapter 30 father that is there to just protect her look out for her just he is just strong he commands his household in the ways of the lord this is why and you you you know ladies like this you know young ladies like this this is why young ladies that have fathers like that they are disgusted by weak men that's what you want because guess what you know what strong men strong men are disgusted by this weak man that's being pushed today strong men are are disgusted it's like it's just nothing's more irritating than an effeminate man to a strong man a strong physical man a strong emotional man and a strong spiritual man and daughters will be the same way like we should raise our daughters to the point where some weakling it makes them sick to their stomach that's how it should be because they're looking they're looking for someone who's going to fill that role of that strong protector this is how it works this is how it works this is also why this is also why and i've seen this several times in my life you know i'm getting older now i think my wife called me old yesterday we're doing follow-ups and and we're driving up we always i like doing follow-ups we just drive around it's the time i get to talk to my wife where there's no you know chaos of life going on and and we're doing follow-ups and we always rate we get to the house or whatever i always say is it a man or a woman if it's a man i'll go to the door if it's a woman um my wife will go to the door and i says a man or woman she says an older man he's about 50 i'm like what are you trying to say wait did you just call me old but anyway that's that's my problem anyway um here's another reason here's another reason that you'll see a certain thing and if you're a little bit i've seen this several times in my life but daughters this is why when a father gets old and a father gets old and frail and sick it is the daughters that have the hardest time with it you say why is that it's because she remembers him as strong it's because when she thinks of her father she thinks of the strength just that man i remember how how strong my dad used to be and she remembers that that leader she remembers that commander she remembers that person that could just do things that just like man just my dad can just do anything my dad can fix anything he can lift anything and then they see you know their dad old maybe in a hospital bed something in it it is very difficult for the daughters to see that but but that's a good thing it's a good thing that that she remembers the strength and that she remembers the power and and the commanding attribute of her father because that means that that's who he was and we're not always going to be physically strong but that's why you see the daughters just get hit with that but it's good because they remember their father is a strong commanding leader it's vital it's vital that the father is strong in everything it is literally the folks it is literally the defining factor for success and failure of the next generation i mean with our daughters that's teaching them how to be treated how to be protected what to look for in their husband and sons i mean i don't want to just totally just dismiss the sons but sons it's teaching them how to protect and teaching them how to be that husband and how to be that father when i am you know my my marriage counseling to my sons is living my life with my wife that is i mean when i when i when i see my sons get married i what what more can i say to them because my life was their their marriage counseling this is how you treat a wife this is how you protect your wife this is how you support your family this is how you raise strong children this is how you do it and look you can't go back you can't have your children getting married and then to say oh i'm gonna go back and and and be that that leader no it's done at that point you're training them both for marriage daughters and sons by being this commanding father who commands his household children and wife in the ways of the lord you say you know i don't want to make people feel bad today but i mean you say what if i didn't have this what if i didn't have this am i just toast turn to song chapter 68 no god has a plan b for you god has a plan b for you there is still success for you you say i didn't have this strong father that you're talking about i didn't have this strong spiritual leader who commanded his household in the ways of the lord if you have it you thank god every day that you have it there's not a lot of people have it you say what if but what about all the people maybe the majority people that don't have it especially in this country what about the majority people that don't have it are they just are they just done is there no hope for them no look at song chapter 68 look at verse number four song chapter 68 verse number four god has a plan for you and this is how that plan works this is how plan b works if somebody failed in that position that was supposed to be your father leading his family in the ways of the lord sing unto god sing praises to his name extol him that right upon the heavens by his name ja that's just a short for uh johova and rejoice before him it's talking about god here and look at verse number five it calls god this it says a father of the fatherless and a judge of the widows is god and his holy habitation you see in verse number five there's a missing man here and god is saying look god's acknowledging that there's a missing man here god's acknowledging the 40 percent of the households today that have a father that's missing god is acknowledging the weak man that's not going to you know command his family in the ways of the lord god's acknowledging that there's a missing man here look there's many different ways that there there could be a single household there's many different reasons maybe a father died maybe there was a divorce maybe you know he just he'd left maybe he was you know not a good man there's lots of that it doesn't matter why though because in verse number five god is saying i will be a father i am he's saying i am a father to the fatherless that's what god is saying and look at verse number six it says god set us the solitary in families he bringeth out those which are bound with chains but the rebellious dwell in dry land god is saying god is saying let me just translate that for you god is saying that if you are you didn't have this you didn't have a good father god will set your way god will show you god will step in to the fatherless go to Ephesians chapter four you say okay he'll guide my way but i'm alone he'll guide my way but i have a bible but that's not a person that's not someone that can you know you know give me a hug and be a father to me like a father that i should have had but yeah but god gave you the bible but he also gave you other things god tells you he'll set your way he'll set your path you have the bible and he's he's not just going to leave you he's not just going to leave you on your own with his word look at verse number 11 of Ephesians chapter four verse number 11 it says and he gave some apostles and some prophets and some evangelists and some pastors and teachers why why did so god is literally saying that he'll be a father to you if you're fatherless but he's saying i've given you all these people i've given you all these other men in your life prophets evangelists pastors teachers why for the perfecting of the saints for the work of the ministry for the edifying of the body of christ which you all are till we all come in unity of the faith and to acknowledge the son of god unto a perfect man unto the measure and the stature and fullness of christ that we henceforth be no more children tossed to and fro you know what god is saying god is saying i'm going to set your way i'm going to set your way and i'm going to give you these people these prophets and pastors and teachers in your life to help you to protect you so you won't be tossed to and fro and carried about with every wind of doctrine by the slight of men he's saying i'll provide that protection for you is what he's saying he's saying here's the substitute right here he's saying the word of god is the substitute my word is the substitute the pastor is the substitute the prophet the teachers because there's many people in cunning craftiness out there they're just laying and wait to just deceive you and destroy you but god's saying i've provided a path for you and protection for you god loves the father was he literally said i will substitute for that she said i never you know if i never had a father or he was terrible father look i'm sorry that was not god's plan for you but i mean this is this is the dark side of free will is that some men will be bad men some men will scar their conscience some men will leave some men will not do the right thing some men will not be fathers some men will be terrible fathers some men will do wicked things that is not on you that wasn't your fault that was his fault and he will be held accountable for that god god will hold him accountable but god has a plan b and god's saying get in church god's saying get in the right church that that's the hardest part of this by the way is is getting in a church that's following the bible god is saying get in the right church follow the bible be faithful be faithful god will set your way it's like god gave you this god gave you this just get in church and i i wish i i've i've told many young men this just get in church and do whatever the pastor tells you if you never had a father just do it ask questions follow directions but look i've seen many young men and young women over the years who came from fatherless or terrible father situations many many more than i can even think of it's a common thing unfortunately i've seen many more successes with the young women though the young women and the young men that never had a father and then get in a church like this or a similar church that teaches the bible like we do here they get in church they be faithful to the lord and and look the lord will be a father to the fatherless to you but i've seen many more successes with young women in this case i mean i've seen so many successes with young women in this case they go on to the they get in church they're faithful they're faithful to church they're faithful to the house of god they end up getting married to a a strong christian man and they go on to have a great marriage and a successful christian life i've seen so many successful successes with young women there and i believe this is this is my thought on this but i believe i've asked myself why is there so many successes with young ladies in that category but not with young men and i believe that it's because it's it's hardwired women are women are by nature followers women are by nature looking for a leader and the woman that finds that proper church and finds the lord get saved and gets in a church and then follows um and is faithful to that church and listens to the word of god that she's reading and she's hearing preached listens to godly counsel that she's receiving through a a strong man of god who is leading from the bible they're just they're looking for a leader and they found the right one in those cases and that's why they're successful with young men it and many like may for many young women it seems easy for them it seems easy for them it no matter what background they came from i wish more young ladies would would throw off i wish we could reach more and more young ladies that are being destroyed by the philosophies of this world and we could get them saved and get them into church and and we would have just great successes there but it's young men that struggle here that that i've seen in my experience it is young men that struggle here they they grew up from almost every single young man that i've seen have trouble in church comes from a home that did not have a father or had a bad father it's not an accident they all have this they all have this these stats just so we saw they all have it in common almost all of them it's 90 percent just like the the studies we saw but with the young men the reason that they have a more difficult time getting into church being faithful getting right following the advice of a pastor and and just like learning how to be a strong leader is because they're by nature a leader these young men are by nature a leader and they don't know how to lead so they're like a rocket without fins these young men and if they can't if if they've never been taught authority in their life and they've never been taught that you know what some authority is ordained by god in your life and if they can't accept that they're never going to be able to be taught how to be that godly commanding leader we're going to talk about the young men more in detail tonight um so i'm not really putting a lot of time on young men but many people with many of these young men with father problems cannot stay in church and it's really sad it's really sad they can't listen to authority the thing is the thing is folks if god gives you a solution and you don't take it or you reject that solution then this is where the victim becomes the perpetrator at some point the victim becomes the criminal in these cases because as you become adult you're you're you're responsible for the things that you do and the people that you harm so look folks in conclusion how fatherhood works i hope you see the the graveness of the situation this morning none of this is to diminish the role of the mother none of it none of it it's just a different role it is a role that is not equal to look it's just as women and men are as highly valued to god spiritually but that's it they have different roles the point i'm trying to get you to understand is that everything rises and falls on leadership whether you like it or not you say i'm a father and i'm a husband and you know uh and i don't like the fact that i have to it doesn't matter your home will rise or fall on how you command or don't command your household it's a massive responsibility that we have as fathers turn back to genesis chapter 19 and the results here's the difference between the man the man's role here here's the real importance of it the failure the failure of the man will drag everyone down the his failure the failure of the father to command his household in the ways of the lord will be a failure for everyone that is what those statistics were really saying if we could sum up those statistics it's that the children without the father fail the what the daughter without the father will fail the son without without the father will fail that is that's what the bible is telling us look at genesis chapter 19 look at verse number 18 genesis chapter 19 and verse number 18 but this is what you have to ask yourself this is what you have to ask yourself now that you know how fatherhood works look at verse 18 it says seeing that abraham shall surely become a great and mighty nation and all the nations of the earth should be blessed in him we know that's a a reference to you know jesus christ the messiah but look at that first part of the verse where it's saying that that he should become a great and mighty nation think about this for a second what if you could become a great and mighty nation i'll talk about you personally dad what if you could command in such a in such a perfect way according to the bible what if you could command the ways of the lord in your family to the degree where generations after you it would still be rippling through your family what if generations after you still loved and serve the lord you could become a great and mighty nation if you do exactly for what abraham did because of how you commanded the way of the lord in your family but this folks this will not be achieved why are we trying to why are we trying to take men why is pastor jones serman was titled today the mandemic why are we trying to take masculinity out of manhood why are we trying to remove the role of the father in families the reason that it is trying to be that that satan ultimately is trying to remove this role is because you will not become a great nation through weakness because satan doesn't want you having children that raise children that raise children that raise children that all become sole winners that all serve the lord with their life that's that's a disaster for satan so he wants to weaken the man he wants to weaken this you will not command this through weakness there are times when you will have to command things that are not popular there are times when you will have to lead your family in things that maybe not everybody wants to go maybe not everybody you need to know what the ways of the lord are and you command your family in the way of the lord no matter what through strength that is what the bible is saying and what you could become a great and mighty nation it's a it's a huge it's a huge undertaking this was the problem in the bible that they couldn't pass their faith onto the next generation this is the problem it will not be achieved through uncertainty it will not be achieved through a father that is leading one day and not leading the next it will not be achieved you will not be a great and mighty nation for generations to come if that's you no no this is a man in genesis chapter 18 and verse number 19 this is a man who is stable who is solid and who is strong in what way in every way he'll lead his household with strength and certainty raising sons and daughters who are left with no doubt on how they should prosecute their lives and bring up the next christian generation it's a big deal that's how it works whether we like it or not and it's a massive responsibility what's power heads and have a word of prayer