 Hi and welcome back to the 21 convention 2018. I am Rolo Tamasi and I am going to be bringing on our next speaker. Our next speaker is a good personal friend of mine and he's become a good personal friend of mine because when I was looking to find some good speakers for the Red Pill Summit that this convention has become, last year I had come across his work with the family alpha and that was the name of his blog and I thought that that was kind of a kind of a bold move to include red pill awareness and to include positive masculinity really into a marriage environment into long-term relationships. I think that this is one of the one of the misnomers, the misunderstandings really about the red pill is that it's only for pickup artistry, it's only for certain aspects but I think what people unfamiliar with the red pill need to understand is that there's so much more application for it and so after encountering Mr. Drew here, we kind of had a relationship I guess, we kind of had a I don't know, some good talks and I helped him with his starting his blog and he's really kind of developed himself into a side of the red pill that I really think needs to be addressed. He is also the co-founder of Fraternity of Excellence which is another thing that I think is really great for helping guys who are a little bit more traditionally minded and so anyways without further ado, I'm going to bring on Mr. Hunter Drew. All right I am Hunter Drew and before I get started into my speech I want to give a thanks, a quick thanks. Now as I say thank you to these men you're going to want to give them a round of applause because the work they've done is absolutely incredible. So first I'm going to start, don't give them the round of applause though, I messed everything up. First we're going to start with Anthony Johnson. The man has put all this on his back and carried us across to where we are today. The amount of work he's done for me to be on this stage is because he gave me the green light. That's not easy, the venues, the transportation, the restaurants, everything, the security that's on him, he's carried that, he's made that his mission, he's living it out, that's incredible. The second thanks is a mentor of mine is the man who just brought me on. Rollo Tomasi is the Don, we all know this, what you don't know is the work that he does behind the scenes. He's never going to ask for credit, he's never going to say hey look what I did, look at me, when you were reaching behind asking for help. He's an individual who helped me and nobody knew it and he wasn't going to tell anybody about it. Most recently I decided to give up alcohol. All right and it was a terrible time because I've been comped this entire time and I have to keep saying no which is terrible. Free drinks and I'm like shit, that sucks. Hey I talked to Roll behind the scenes, a while back he said hey man we got to dial this in, you know you're like a freaking party animal, you know what I was like you know what, that was controlling me. I didn't get a DUI, I didn't have any issues like that but I was like I did not have control over it and that as men, we need to have control of our vices, not them over us. So that's a pill I had to swallow, it was hard, Rollo was there, he didn't tell anybody about that, that's a conversation we had offline, so that's another one. Third, the only reason the family alpha is still in operation and the only reason that I was around to co-found the fraternity of excellence with Craig James because of Ivan Throne. I had a really, it was zero dark 30, we're talking one in 30 in the morning, two o'clock in the morning, sitting in his room, I had every intention of shutting down my blog last 21con. I was busy, it was enough, I was trying to lead my family, I thought I had too much going on and I didn't think I was needed. I saw all the other great resources, what's the point of having a married dude with two kids out here talking about this? And then Ivan said hey, you're like a freaking lighthouse, you're keeping the other men from crashing on the rocks, you're giving a signal, you're throwing a rope and in that room I decided I'm going all in, I'm going balls to the wall and without him here I would not be here, I would not be online anymore and anything you've ever gained from me for those who have found anything from my work, that man right there is where you bring your things, not me, I'm only creating because he was there for me when I needed him, so those are my three things. Now we're going to start spinning into the talk. So writing for the man of spirits like having Asperger's is somewhere on a spectrum, now the problem with me, normally you find yourself, I'm in the red spectrum, I'm a purple pill life coach over here a spectrum, I'm in this spectrum, when it comes to where I'm at, I'm all over the fucking place, I'm blue pill, I'm red pill, I'm purple pill, I'm crimson red, I'm the family cuck, I'm a hobbit, I'm the red pill beta, I've been all over the damn place, I don't even know what the hell I am, but throughout it all I've not given a fuck, I'm Hunter fucking Drew, that's what I am, and I'm going through all this as such, so when I hear all these things, you're this, no I'm not, I'm me, no you're gonna be that, no I'm me, I'm gonna keep doing it, you suck, get offline, you suck, stay on Reddit, I've got my website, confine me, so when you look at it, people were not able to influence me and that's something that I'm noticing with those who speak to the speakers, I'm realizing I've got that irrational confidence, I've got that belief in self that's not allowing these these outside influences to change my message, I'm not allowing anybody to dictate what it is I'm gonna say, I'm not gonna say what you want to hear, I'm gonna say what I have to say, I'm not gonna say what sells, I'm gonna say what I have to fucking say, because that's me, I can't give you anything else except for my personality, except for my perspective on the world, now one of the problems that was really irking me is that a lot of men think they aren't good enough, when somebody tells them you suck, you're right, I suck, I should stop writing, hey, you know, you can't achieve this, oh shit, you're right, I shouldn't, I can't achieve that, I'm not capable, I'm not good enough, no that's a fucking lie, that's what's been told to you from feminism, from everybody that's trying to break you down from birth, you are good enough and you had a fire when you were born, when you were young you had that masculine fire, you wanted to play in the mud, you wanted to run around, you wanted to climb things, you wanted to jump, you wanted to fight, you wanted to just explore, you had a fire inside that was raw, but then something started putting it out, that flame, you started going from a 10 to a 9, 9 to an 8, maybe it was your teachers, maybe you didn't have a mentor, maybe dad left, you have all these reasons and you're saying it's because of my past, because of my past left, because of my dad left, that's why I wasn't able to achieve it, hey, it's okay, because this happened to me, that's why I can't achieve that, my past is preventing me from doing this, my foundation, I don't have a solid foundation to build upon, so of course you're right, I can't achieve this and you listen to people and then that fire goes out and when that fire goes out, you stop chasing your mission, you become numb, you become apathetic, you stop having passions, you stop caring about anything going on because you're just like, fuck it, I'll do my 9 to 5, I'll get married, have kids, get fat, kill myself, have divorce, get divorced, fuck whatever it is, that's the story right, that's what they keep telling you, you know what I'm standing on this goddamn stage, I'm married, two kids, having a great time, not because I'm the most average dude in here, look at me, I am nothing special, I'm the goddamn midget of this whole fucking convention, you've been hearing it the entire time, yet I come up here and my presence takes over because I don't give a fuck, I'm not gonna let you say, hey, 5'8", and it's not even a hobbit, it's a fucking dwarf, I have a beard, you guys should know this, a goddamn dwarf, I'm not Bilbo man, I'm Gimli, so I'm gonna give you a quick background of myself so you can kind of see, hey, shit that happened to you happens to everyone, it's what you do with it, you don't let your past define you, you don't let who you were dictate who you are, when I was younger, I was a product, I was a single, I had a single mom, my parents got split up so it was me and my mom, she found another guy, they had kids, life was great, right, they had my brother and sister who are twins, at five when they're two, my mom kills herself, so now I'm going from a single mom operating to I lost my mom, I'm a product, I'm a child of suicide, oh man that should start sucking, you know that's terrible, I should start feeling bad, I've got every justification in the world to say why I can't win, and I'm only five years old and I can start saying that's why, I didn't succeed because suicide, because single mom, then I found this manual and it's a really good one, you guys have probably found it too, it's called how to be a nice guy, and I wanted to win that game, I was gonna be the best nice guy that could be, because that's what movies told me, because that's what stories told me, that's what books told me, my dad was in the navy, so he was always in and out, so there was no permanent father figure for me, when he came in it was great, we're gonna do man shit, but that's cool for a week, and then you're gone for two months, that's not a permanent, that's not an impact on you, so I'm reading hey how do you get girls, well you share your feelings, well they don't like muscles, they like when you cry, you should cry, cry in front of a girl, man make some flood, that's how you get chicks, that's what I was obviously a product of the nice guy syndrome, trying to out nice guy, the nice guys, then I joined the navy, and in the navy I kind of unfucked myself, I realized for the first time in my life, my future was in my control, the navy, the military is not difficult, you go to boot camp, it is not physically difficult, it is not mentally difficult, but when you're alone, when you're put out there to say hey perform and you get something or don't and you don't, I learned, hey it pays to be a winner, hey if I try hard, I get things, if I get motivated and I get my team pumped up, we all win and when we all win, it's like a rising tide, all those boats go up, that's kind of leading me to where we're at right now, when you do something, when you take control of your fire, you can spread it to others, you can pass that on, so in the navy that's where I learned that, now before I joined the navy in high school, I met my wife, girlfriend then, we started dating, joined the navy, life is great, I do that for eight years, I was five years on a ship, two deployments, then three years on instructor duty, fantastic, greatest time of my life, it was just an adventure every single freaking day, after my first deployment I married my girlfriend, became a wife after five years of us dating, we had my son, I then go to shore duty, we have my daughter, I'm then presented with a choice, I'm up for orders, I can either go back to a ship and deploy, see the navy is a little different than the other branches, you're always in and out, I told you the story about my dad, home for a week gone for a month, home for two weeks gone for two months, then you deploy, I realized after having a son and the daughter, I could either be a good sailor or I could be a good father, when I was young I wanted to be cone in, I wanted to be cone in, have my chicken and loincloth, freaking going around like a leopard print, and then a bunch of children's running around, I knew I wanted the family, my decision was made for me, it wasn't even throw a bonus at me, throw an increased rank, didn't matter, I was getting out, so I jumped without knowing where it's gonna land, I left the navy which is a great career, I was doing very well for myself, and I said I'll figure it out, found a job, pretty cool, things are good, then I hit a rough patch, my wife and I went through some things, my white picket fence, you know the Disney, the fairy tale, it was destroyed, it crashed into the ground, it shattered, burned in the flames, and I was prevented with the choice, go or stay, I stayed, I then came back though, you fuck with me, I'm gonna fuck with you, and I hit it back, and then she was presented with a choice, so coming up she made her decision, go or stay, she decided to stay, and the beauty behind that, I don't wish anybody on the storyline, but if you find yourself in a situation like this, is you're no longer together because you're trying to keep up with something, you're no longer together because you're trying to make the storybook last, you want to do the high school sweetheart story, now you're together because you chose to be together, it's crazy, but it works, as I was going through that, I created the family alpha, now before creating the family alpha, I was on the red pill subreddit, as well as married red pill subreddit, you won't see me on the red pill, because A, the quarantined, but B, the black list of me, you won't see me on married red pill, because rhinestone banned me, he won't admit it, because he's being a polite Canadian fuck, but he gave me the boot, he said, ah, go do that shit somewhere else, so I was like fine, I'll do my own website, we're gonna do it that way, so we've got the family alpha going, and it's great, and then I found, we ran, we did a 21 con, and that was a game changer, that's where this happened, that's where I got to see men and rub shoulders with men and see, holy shit, this isn't just talking online, this is some real world shit, this matters, this is changing lives, this is changing a political, our social landscape, this is what's gonna change, make a generational change to where our children, my children, might see a different future than the one I'm facing right now, you know, a lot of guys talk about ah, it's doom and gloom, it's gonna get so much worse before it gets better, they're absolutely correct, but that says it whole, in my bubble, I'm trying to keep that off, I'm trying to fight that back, and I do that from that 21 con, I realized, holy shit, Ivan, I already mentioned it, hey get up man, you're a lighthouse, you're a torch, a lighthouse, you're keeping men from smashing into the ground, you're putting a message out there, preventing them from hitting rock bottom, maybe they can pull up before they hit those rocks, that's what you're doing, a torch, it's a dark fucking world, this world does not care about you, honestly the world's trying to kill you if you really look at it, but the world doesn't care, but when you have that torch and that dark world and you hold it in the air, another man might see it, he might start walking towards you, and when he finds it, he's like, wow, hey brother, what are you up to? Hey, I'm doing this, check it out, this is working for me, I feel good, I'm alive, I'm a man in a society that hates men, shoulders back, I'm proud, I'm having a great fucking time, here, let me light your torch, go over there, he goes his way, I go mine, but now there's two torches, and that's what we're doing, we're lighting torches, we're helping men realize there is a purpose to this, so I come back from last 21 con, then we have December of Discipline, which is the 31st DTM campaign, and Craig James has this brilliant idea, let's create a tribe, let's create our own, that's where the Fraternity of Excellence came in, co-founded that, then we ran Men of March, September of Success, and now I'm here, that's how I got to this stage, I have many opportunities to say, hey, I'm out of this, I can't achieve anything, I was a product of a single mom, I was a product of a child of suicide, hey I grew up without a masculine role model, I've got all the reasons that a lot of men here have told me that that's why I suck, I can't do this because of that, I can't do this because of that, who you were doesn't make you who you are, I spent five years in high school, I was a fucking loser, like I just couldn't get it, but then I joined the Navy, got out of that and something clicked, this is your opportunity for something to click, recognize that, now why do I keep writing, why do I keep going to these things, why do I keep putting stuff out, why do I work on the fraternity when I could just simply take the easy life of raising my kids, well it's because I want a future for my son, where men like you will raise your sons in a winter where he'll have peers, there'll be other little masculine motivated men running around, fucking hope so, that's part of it, for damn sure, I hope I plant those seeds in your minds to where you're like, hell yeah, your kid's gonna find my kid and they're gonna go be beast and go out there, I coach his baseball team, I was talking to Ryan Stone earlier, I hope I'm raising a bunch of like chads and they're just gonna take over and they're gonna be like man, my coach and coach Drew was a fucking beast because I held him to a standard, I set that example, I have got that torch and I'm lighting theirs, all those little flames are running around, I'm allowing them to be men, I'm giving them discipline, hey you don't get a trophy for showing up, you get a trophy for putting out, you get a trophy for winning, you get a trophy for giving it your all and even if you lose you gave it your all so you get some respect, maybe you didn't win but you learned a thing or two about where your limits are and sometimes you've got to cross that line and fall on your face to find out how far you can go, a lot of kids don't have that, a lot of kids are robbed of that, a lot of us were robbed of that, you might hear because of my daughter, got a beautiful six-year-old girl, that's fucking rough, going in there, as a father you don't pass your daughter off to the mom, that's a part of it, your daughter's gonna emulate the mother but as a man you're gonna set the standard of what it is for the men that she's looking for, you're gonna set the bar from which she measures all other men, set a high fucking bar, she'll bring back motivated men, she'll know what it is you're looking for, what it is you expect, how families should operate because when you feel the masculine and your wife's allowed to feel the feminine, your son is allowed to see the masculine, your daughter's allowed to see the feminine, hey these are my roles, here's how I support, hey your son's like hey here's how I lead, you can do that, you can do that for nephews, nieces, your friends, kids, you can provide them with something that they don't normally have and that's lacking significantly in our society today, last thing I might hear from my brotherhood, that's part of it, like I said I met Ivan last year, I met all these guys last year, I met new guys this year, it's incredible, but that's not what this is about, see what this is about is I'm here because I see the strings that are controlling the system, I'm here because I saw the wizard behind the curtain, except that fucking wizard is the female imperative, the anti-masculine messages that are always being spread in movies and once you see it, you cannot unsee it and once you see it, how can you go to bed at night knowing there are men out there struggling, how can you not want to set the example that I'll break the shackles and allow this to be free, think about it, looking back on my life, there were times I had a friend, pretty fat, and I'll always remember this, he was doing the truffle shuffle because that was his thing because he was fat, he could do it perfectly, the perfect jiggle, he had that perfect donut, it would wiggle, it was fucking awesome, but one time, it was pretty funny as the dude, you know what's not funny, when you look over on the couch and you see his wife put her head in the hands shaking it, it's pretty funny when you see your friends doing those Homer Simpson jokes and quoting Peter Griffin, that is pretty funny, they've got some great one-liners, haha, look at that quagmire, here's what you don't see, you don't see the man alone in this bed wondering why the fuck his wife won't touch him, you don't see the man sitting there screaming into a pillow because he doesn't know what's wrong, he's doing everything he's told is right, he's following the path, he's doing the nice guy things he's providing, he's working, he's giving everything he has to his family, yet no one respects him, no one's looking and saying hey, good job, I appreciate what you're doing, so then he looks at that gun, he looks at that rope, he's driving to work and every single fucking day he's looking at the median saying what if I just fucking turn the wheel, what if I just hit it, what if today is the day because I've had enough, that is why I'm here, that shit stays inside my head, I see it, I see when I see my family who's overweight trying to be confident, haha let's go play football, I know that they're sitting, they're going into their room afterwards trying to catch their fucking breath because they can't breathe, I know they're embarrassed when they go to the beach, I know they got their shirt on because they're ashamed of who they are but they can't talk about it because they've got to put on that persona, they've got to keep smiling, everything's okay but everything isn't okay, it isn't, it just simply isn't and you can see it, you can see in the eyes, they don't lie, they'll never lie, you can see the sadness, you can see that void, that's why I'm here, I hope that something I say plants that seed, more importantly I hope we light our flames, that comes from Ivan, that's what he did for me and I realized that's exactly what I want to talk about this 21 con, I'm married, we can talk about marriage, I'm a father, we can talk about fatherhood but the most important thing you can take from this is a lit fucking torch inside your soul, it's all a build up to the introduction to this speech, just realize that, this speech is the flame of freedom, last speech, the audacity of authenticity, I've got a thing for alliteration, now Swift, I know that's a big word, I'll get you the definition after, but you know what I'm talking about, that fire, that's what you felt when you were out smoking cigars, that's what you felt when we were all there talking shit, that fire inside, that's what you felt when we were over here rubbing shoulders, kind of giving each other jabs, walking down the street, your shoulders are back because you've got, I've got freaking, I haven't throw, or I haven't to my left, I got Swift at my six, I've got a bunch of motivated dudes walking over here, you're talking to Jack Donovan having drinks, you're like holy shit, I'm a fucking man, this is what it's about, and many of you said exactly that, this is what the fuck it's about, this is it, that's the fire I'm talking about, it's something burning inside you, you felt that, that way you felt when you were a child, that childhood flame, that pure masculine energy, I call it a fire, you can call whatever the hell you want, to me it's a fire because that goes with flame of freedom, but you light it and it starts burning and the worst thing you can possibly do is let that pile of light go out when you leave here, that's what this is about, you've got to carry what it is you're feeling, that burning inside, you want to do, everybody says I want things to change, how about you change, how are things going to change unless you light those fires and others, I'm not saying let's start our tribes and start running around, but you act as the example, you have to have a conversation, they'll come to you once they see you smiling, people are going to follow your example, they're not going to follow your advice, you can say hey son, you should work out and you should read, the kid's going to be like dad, you've been watching Netflix for 52 weeks straight, you haven't read a book in a fucking like three years, what, no that's not how it works, that's the same thing with your friends, as a father you can bring your child with you to the gym, as a father you can have your kid watching the videos that you're watching, if you're watching some educational, hey look check this out, I'm learning about whatever, see we're going to use this technology as a tool, we're not going to use it as a toy, we're not going to sit here and use our television as something that we can numb ourselves with, we're going to use it as something that can educate us, tablet toddlers are the worst thing in the goddamn world, because you're too lazy as a parent to raise your own child, you plug them in front of a TV or you plug them in front of a tablet and that's it, there's no moderation, hey go to town, everything, I'm going to go do something that's not going to improve me at all, I'm just probably going to sit and relax, you stay there in front of the screen, husbands, a lot of our boyfriends, LTRs, whatever you are, you look at your girl, oh she's naggy, oh she's harping, I'm not getting sex, she's a fucking mirror, she's reflecting your performance as a man, she's reflecting what you've done and what you've created and what you've allowed, if you don't draw boundaries and enforce them it's not a boundary, that's a fun fact for you, if you say don't do this and she does and you're like okay well don't do it next time, that's not how that works, you set the standard from which excellence will be measured, with yourself, you set the example by acting, by doing, by being the message that you're sending into the world, you can't just say it, this is not how it works, and for men, maybe not a father, maybe not a boyfriend, maybe you're just doing your own thing and I'm not saying Midtown, I'm just saying maybe you're just a dude trying to find yourself in the world, by you sitting there and just reclaim, going to the gym, you leave here and you're like guys I'm dying this shit, I'm sick of it, I'm getting rid of the excess weight, I'm getting rid of the lack of definition that I have, I'm going to start eating right, I'm going to start finding a hobby, I kind of slipped away because I got a little more comfortable relaxing at home playing fucking Fortnite, I'm going to get back to building motorcycles, I'm going to get back to riding my mountain bike, I'm going to get back to riding my motorcycle, doing something, that is how you set the example for others, that is how you light a fire, you don't have to walk up to them and say hey we're going to lead the next crusade and fight feminism, that's not what it's about, that doesn't work, what you can do is simply own your shit, live your life, set your example and others will follow, they will see it, they will wonder why are you so happy when everybody else is so fucking sad, I've got family members who will not admit that I helped them dial in their fitness, dial in their hobbies, yet I know it because once I started working out and lifting I was like hey dad do you want to come with me, hey brother cousin, whatever, come with me friend, nah I don't want to go, I want to go, I want to go, I start lifting, oh wow looking a little bit better, those arms are growing believe it or not, hey all of a sudden, yeah you got it, all of a sudden they start doing the same, it's not about you getting a pat in the back, it's not about them saying hey thanks Hunter for doing that for me, no it's just about helping your fellow men, you don't get accolades for that, that's what men do, they own their shit and when others are there and they need help, you're there to help them, but by setting that example and lighting that fire, all of a sudden you see you went to 21Con, you got to see Hunter Drew, you got to see all these fantastic speakers who are putting out this solid content, they don't have that, so you've got to embody all 30 speakers of harmony there are, that's all inside you, you've got to embody every single thing you learned in here and pass that onto yours and those around you, that's how you make change, that's how you bring change into the world that you keep saying you want to see but you don't want to act, you don't want to work for it, when you work on yourself that will bring that change, I'm fucking so sick of people saying oh we got to change the landscape, oh there's a war against men, so what are you going to do about it, just keep fucking talking, again talking about things is not how it works, you know I live to the motto of act and non-verbal, which is Latin for deeds not words, it's what you do, it's not what you say, you can read a thousand books, you can read a hundred blog posts, that makes you a well-read man, that doesn't change your life, that makes you an individual who learned a lot of shit, that's great, you know a lot of things, what are you applying, I was talking earlier to Tanner, him in well-built style, he put the content out, I was looking at pictures from last year, I was like you know what my fashion sucks, my style is awful, look to their content, wow this is what works, this is what works, this is what works, I could have just said all right, I'm going to keep it closed though, I'm not going to do anything, I just now I know how fashion works, that doesn't change you, that doesn't change your appearance, you can look at all AJ's programs, oh I read Wolverine, I'm going to fucking jack to you Jackman, I'm going to get it, I read it, I read it twice, did you lift, did you move, oh no you didn't, you're going to be the next Jackman though right, we laugh because that's what guys are doing, it's your action that breaks the shackles of those around you, it's your action that allows others to break out of the mold that they've been forced into by society, it's you throwing those robes, not by saying hey man I'm throwing the rope but by just saying hey look at me, I'm going to go fix myself, we don't have to keep doing this, and they'll see hey there's another way to live, I didn't know this but there's another fucking way, you mean I don't have to say happy wife happy life, a lot of guys don't even know there is an alternative, they have no idea there's another way to live, you can't self-sacrifice your way to happiness, that's not how that works, you put others in front of you every single time saying oh I'll sacrifice for them, I'm not going to pursue my hobby, oh you know I'm going to make sure I work really hard, I'm going to be able to buy this person this, but I can't take care of myself, when you're finding yourself in a situation like that you've got to realize you are going to die a very sad and broken man, you're going to be discarded because you were used up, you have nothing of value to bring to the table anymore, you've got to set yourself first, and I'm not saying in a selfish manner to which you are just a fucking prick, what I'm saying is you've got to invest in you, you've got to learn to like you because once you like you you're like hey man I'll take care of you, and that you being yourself, so realize when I talk about breaking the shackles, when I talk about lighting that flame and others, I mean it, you are not going to see a change in your life from this convention unless you do something about it, there's no reason for you to come here, pay the money you did, make the risks you did, and then leave here saying I got to listen to some cool people, I got to hang out, I got to see AJ, I got to see Ryan, Rolo, holy shit Jack Donovan's fucking jacked, you got to see these guys that's cool, I got to, that's not what this is about, you're not here to be a fucking groupie are you, you're here to like own your fucking masculinity, you're here to reclaim what you once had, that fire inside your soul, that's why you're here, and for some guys they're like shit, all right this guy's just fucking rambling, that doesn't apply to me, but it definitely does and a part of you know it does, you came here for a reason because something was wrong, you came here because something wasn't right and you were going to invest in yourself, Jack was talking about it, by getting here you took the first step, you showed up, that's more than 90% of the people out there, those guys will still continue to say I want to change my life, but I don't want to do anything to change my life, I just want it to change, you guys are here, you're in the seats, but this doesn't get you to the finish line, it gets you to the starting point, it's what you do once you leave here, that dictates you, what you took from it, you can say all day, oh man 21 con, that's it, that's my new starting point, that's a new foundation for what you're going to build the greatest self in every fucking scene in the goddamn world, that you could say that, but what are you going to do when you get home, what are you going to do when nobody's looking at you, when there's no more schedule, when there's no more dinners, when there's no more cigars, what are you going to do then, are you going to take action, I certainly fucking hope so, there are a lot of quotes thrown at you, Socrates is saying follow your biological imperative, you know have the family reproduce, Rolo is saying don't get married though, find a way to do it outside of that, you've got Richard Cooper saying here's 19 things, I'm going to tell my son this and you've got Ryan saying well fathers they're not essential to this and you're somewhere in the middle, here's what you've got to understand, your path is your path, what you want to do is what you want to do, don't do something because you think I'm going to give you a high five for it, I don't give a shit, I thought that guy Caleb Jones or whatever his name was, that guy was awesome, I'm in a monogamous relationship with two kids and that dude has got all sorts of shit going on, I thought that was cool as fuck, he's a man, I mean he truly, he's a man living his mission, I don't give, if you want to be a playboy, be a playboy, if that's what you want to do, if you want to be artistic, go out there and be artistic, follow Goldman's example, the dude is a brilliant mind, he's a beautiful mind to see the artwork that he comes out with, find that in yourself, that's a beautiful thing, you want to be in an LTR, be in an LTR, you want to go for marriage, I don't recommend it but go for it, do it, you know I fuck it, it's your life, figure it out, but here's the thing that a lot of people don't like to hear, not only do you have to own your choice, you have to own all the consequences of your choices, everything that comes with it, the consequences that come with the choice you make, you own those two, you don't get to say I want to be a playboy and then you're like man I wish I had fucking kids, no man you make your decision, you stick with it, you factor all that in, you're going into it, you have to go into it with all the information armed and that's what this is about, you're getting information, you do your research and then you decide I want to do this, go forward and fucking do it and then own the ever-living shit out of it and everything that comes with it, I know damn well, if I were to get the forest I'm going to lose a lot of shit, that's a risk I took, we're in a good spot now, very happy, love my life, love my family, love my wife, everything's great, next week fucking could blow up, who fucking knows and if it does I'll own it, it's not going to be resentment, it's not going to be fucking what if I'm not going to be bitter, I'm like hey man I tried, I at least tried, I went out and I tried something and that's what you guys need to do, you've got to decide and try because you can't stay in this little apathetic you know purgatory that you're stuck in, you can't find yourself stuck in like I kind of think I want to do this but I might want to do that and it's okay if I do this and guess what another year goes by you're at 21 con 2019 in the same exact spot you were in before because you can't make a damn decision and again that's a part of being a man being able to decide being able to own it and being able to go forward now all the speakers before me they came up here and they gave some quality content what are you doing with it besides putting it in a notebook are you thinking about your action plan like hey this is exactly what I needed this this is a stepping stone to get me to that next level of understanding of where I want to go I hope so because if you're just sitting there listening thinking this is like a concert you're fucked up you are incorrect you know you might not want to hear it you might think this is a great hangout session but that that's not what this is this is also not some giant self-help group this is for you to arm yourself the information you need to make the decision you know you need to make but it's on you to make it and again if I see you in 21 con 2019 and you haven't done a damn thing that's on you man you should be disappointed in yourself now I had a conversation with two dudes I want to keep their identities so one will be called Chad the other will be called thundercock all right let's start with thundercock thundercock had to make a decision in the moment yes or no gas pedal down gas pedal up he's I'm deciding gas pedal down go own the decision moved on we were talking about it great shit he made a decision he moved on guess what I'm not going to your percentage because I almost failed that class in college but statistically a lot of people would not be able to decide they got a nope fuck I don't want to commit well we'll go with yes for now but maybe it's going to be no later no he made a decision stuck with it he's not going back now let's go to Chad Chad has a decision to make but he's got a window to make it he has he has a timeline to make it he didn't have to make his at the same time as thundercock all right a lot of you are going to find yourself having to make a decision when you leave this place you're going to go home and you're going to ask yourself am I keeping these friends around is my family toxic do I need to change jobs do I have to dump this lady do I have to get a divorce do I have to break up do I need to go and find something new do I have to go move my fucking to somewhere else because that's where I have to go I have to get to a geographical location these are all decisions like fuck I'm getting home I'm making the decision for some it's hey I need to go to the doctors my fucking t levels are like 15 I'm struggling I gotta go yeah I gotta stop talking about how I've got a low t and start saying hey I'm gonna fix my low t because talking about a problem is for women finding a solution that's what men do chicks love to talk like hey man I got this problem do you need help nah I just want to talk about a problem cool but if a guy does that to me I'm like I'm not your girlfriend we're gonna find that we're gonna work towards a solution or shut the fuck up you know there's no in between some of you're gonna go home though I'm like Chad you're gonna have a window you're gonna know hey I've got I've got some time to work on something but a decision is coming up and I have to be ready and you've got to prepare yourself it might be your health it might be your wealth you know your mind your body your spirit something might be going on you know within the next six months to one year you're going to have to make a major decision that's going to change your life forever and you've got to be ready you don't get to keep passing off and just being apathetic about everything you've got to decide to move forward with your life there's no other path last thing I want you to ask yourself if the men inside 21 con I keep going to this side because the flags right behind me that's patriotic as fuck if the men if the men inside these walls inside 21 con which keeps on growing like doubling and doubling and doubling the standard keeps raising and raising raising if the men inside those walls aren't going to be the ones who change this landscape then who is you really need to ask yourself if I'm not the man who's going to make that change inside my my friendships my community my local sphere who is how many times you're going to look around and say we've got problems guys we've got fucking problems because there are some serious problems we're all facing in our world it might be your neighborhood it might be the school district that you're in there might be issues you know with the parent pta and you know how they're they're pushing kids the the scouts whatever it is you can't keep saying hey guys we have problems somebody has to start working towards a solution and if it's not the men inside this room who's it going to be this is it when you look around these are the people who are going to make a change there's nothing like this in the goddamn world what anthony has created i've said it's a game changer not because i'm like hey hope i come back next year but more because i want him to realize it is true this is different than any other place you're going to go you're not going to go to something that's going to talk about the topics we talk about you're not going to find anybody else saying shit that you're not going to like to hear because a lot of places want to coddle you because that's how they do it hey life is good everything's great no you're okay you tried hard buddy that's good that's not how it works we're saying you've got to do the fucking work you've got to get to where you want to go if you're not willing to do that you don't get to bitch about what's going on against men you're a part of the problem guys don't like to hear that makes them uncomfortable shit i haven't done anything i read a blog i've got a podcast i try to put shit out into the world i try to be that lighthouse to help guys from crashing on the rocks i've never fucking gone to a protest you know i've not pulled the ivan throne where he rips the fucking flag out but i'm trying to do something that's me putting forth my effort i coach my son's baseball team and this isn't the hey look at me i'm so fucking awesome it's just simple examples of look i'm trying to do something to help change the landscape we're all talking about what are you doing what are you doing in your life that is going to change or make just a slightest impact for your children if you have them for your wife if you've got one for your brothers if you if you just have friends going around or just for the men inside this goddamn room you spent nights with them you're going to be spending a week with them you make those friendships you hear those stories you hear about the men suffering you find out what's going on you realize hey this does fucking suck this is brutal a lot of guys have some bad stories what are you doing to help it what are you doing to be a fucking tack in the in the plus column you need to ask yourself that you need to step back and say hey if it's not me who's going to fix this who is it is the burden on me is it on the speakers this is shit it's not about us this is about you guys we show up just to try to put our word out there but we aren't we are just fucking like 30 dudes you're 219 fuck imagine that imagine if everyone you decided after this speech because it's fucking awesome that you're going to go out into the world and you're going to be like i'm going to fix one thing that's 219 drops in the fucking flood that's going in the right direction you can do that you can be that one drop some of you are going to be like hey i'm going to create my own resource i'm going to create my own blog cool that's like fucking 10 drops somebody else and be like all right i'm going to start my own podcast somebody else i'm going to start my own business somebody else hey i'm going to get involved in the parent teacher association i'm going to do something that's going to help you know change my community maybe in your church you start getting active like yo chicks relax i got this maybe you can be that voice knocks the sense into it because if you're not going to do that you don't get to talk about the problems that we're facing because you're a part of it that went much faster than i wanted it to was trying to avoid the q and a gentleman that's my speech questions all right oh come on man no one's got questions of this man that was a hell of a speech man let's give it up to him again thank you for the great speech since you're the family alpha this is your choice it's the path you've taken i think all men face a desire and temptation at pretty much all moments of their life for sexual desire for various women but we realize that that comes with consequences and how do you transition into a long-term committed monogamous relationship and what do you do if moments come up of desire temptation for other people what do you say to yourselves in those moments to remind you about the choice you've made and not break the promise that's a good question so first you maintain attraction in your relationship you know if you have a long-term relationship that doesn't mean you stop doing what you did to get the girl which has already been covered you know i wrote a post called creating your slit which is basically you create an environment where sexual activity is just fantastic so you can't follow the whole it's eight o'clock let's turn the lights off and we're gonna have missionary all right let's go ahead that gets old really fast familiarity kills attraction you see each other every day we got a long-term relationship or marriage that woman has seen you sick that woman's seen you in the worst situations you've ever been in you're there every day she's got your goddamn closures you fold them up attraction can die fast if you allow it now on the other side what if you keep changing it up what if you keep evolving as a man what if you keep finding new moves new locations new toys to bring into the mix you keep it going i've been married for 10 years now i was 10 years in october all right i don't know august there it is 10 years 10 years in august we were fucking married and it's still you know the attraction is there you're having fun you don't get old you know it doesn't get tired you can have a blast with your woman you should be having fun and then if you're out and you're seeing something like we're walking around and chicks are just like half dressed in this place i mean like orlando is insane compared to where i'm from you see it it's there i'm satisfied my woman keeps me fully satisfied like drained like there's no there's no desire you know she takes care of me so we're good hey honor great speech thank you just gonna keep my question as short as i can i'm going on a year-long trip right and like you you hit me with that speech how can i play a bigger role in the manosphere and turn my trip into an example for everyone here any suggestions you live authentically man you're an example just by embodying it that's a great question by choosing to own your shit we say live authentically live genuinely that's in the moment what you decide upon is like what's your real answer to a question that's asked of you yes or no you say yes or no hey do you want to go out to eat here yep you start being a man other men want to be like and then all of a sudden they start trying to raise their standard because they don't get left behind you start raising your bar every single day you know physically mentally spiritually you start trying to do more now there i could say hey write a blog that'll help people i could say podcast youtube i could say a lot of things but what it comes down to is you as a man you can start to own your shit you can start lighting that fire and living at your shoulders back eyes forward like hey i don't give a fuck i'm going to do things my way and not give a fuck you know live unapologetically there's nothing wrong with being a man thanks no great speech i love your energy a lot um i've met a lot of guys here that are in their 20s 30s 40s single never married myself i'm in my 50s a couple of marriages a couple long terms that went south i have two daughters they're in their 20s what would you tell a guy who does want to have children who we don't recommend getting married for all the reasons why to have children because i can tell you there's nothing more special than when my daughter was born and i cut that cord twice and i haven't heard any of that i've been unplugging myself for a year and a half but there's no talk about that i'm going to take those memories with me for the rest of my life whatever happens you know going forward what would you tell a man in his 20s 30s or 40s who has no children thinks he wants children because we're biologically meant to have children and pass our dna on forward thank you first off you vet very well second i'm with you i don't know if you guys noticed when i talked about my kids i rapid fired because that shit was starting to hit me in the heart vet well find a girl you want to have kids with she checks all those green boxes if i could go back we would go to a beach you know this isn't about having a day for a woman to show off become a bride's ill it's about the coming together of two people i would go to a beach i'd find family law i'd put a ring on her finger and have her legally change her last name i would not sign any license her and i would have a freaking party just bring friends and then high five hey it's not an official marriage but that's what i would call my marriage thank you great appreciate your authenticity i've talked to a lot of people here and it seems like most of us found the red pill or the the idea during a moment of crisis and i was curious if that's kind of what led you to finding kind of the community and then just secondly it sounds like you've had an amazing year last year a lot of incredible decisions that took place and now you're up here talking about them maybe even go into detail of some of those hardcore decisions that led you to the stage today all right so i found the red pill through when i got at the navy i was with some motivated dudes like those guys we did mansion and then when i got in the navy they were gone and there was nobody there to fill their spot so i started looking online i found the red pill subreddit and that's how i found the red pill as far as my decisions i mean we've faced some some serious shit you know i'm looking at my blog wondering what are we gonna do we're gonna upgrade you know i came across craig james we had to decide are we gonna start this fraternity like this is it's gonna be a lot of work you got two weeks to do it can we do it you just do it you just go balls out man like a lot of people can justify why not taking action is the right way we could have done that we don't have enough time you don't have enough resource none of this or you can say fuck it jump go figure it out when you land that's what i mean that's my decision making process just go air in the side of action all right thanks recently um rollo touched on the origin of chivalry on one of the most recent red man groups and how it's being used interchangeably with uh today's courting behaviors so i was curious after attending a convention like this do we need to reclassify gentlemen mannerisms i.e. opening car doors for women as blue pill the biggest thing you can do is get rid of any covert contract you have in your life whether you want to open the door he doesn't it doesn't matter make your own code follow your own code what you want to do you do it not because you think it's going to get you something because that's what you feel a man should do you make your code you have children you can pass it to them but that's i can't tell you your code i definitely can't do justice to whatever rollo put out i'm like rollo for eighth graders like that she doesn't work but i will say you set your code i don't tell you what's right or wrong like i said about i believe kaleb jones i think that was his last name but that guy i don't i'm not gonna tell him what he's doing is wrong i think it's legit he's owning it you've got to own what your code is thanks hey there i hope you'll still speak to me after uh my buddy josh tried to pick up your wife in the bar last night yeah that's one yeah so uh it's nice being here with uh with a fellow married man i unapologetically love my wife but i am curious uh if you could share your your wife's reaction to you becoming red pill um i don't know what that really means so when i joined the navy i owned my shit like i don't we don't we don't we don't have the issues that a lot of guys have with needing permission to do things i kind of just do my thing and she does her thing and it works really well so coming here is she just knew that's what i had to do there was no real issue that i just want to answer it better but i don't think i can do my thing she does her as it works