 Dennis Day is brought to you by Colgate Dental Cream and Luster Cream Shampoo. Colgate Dental Cream to clean your breath while you clean your teeth. Luster Cream, the cream shampoo for true hair loveliness. The Dennis Day Show with Barbara Eiler, B. Benadera, Dink Trout, John Brown, Charles Dent in the Orchestra and yours truly, Vern Smith is written by Frank Galen and stars our popular young singer in A Day in the Life of Dennis Day. Here's Dennis to sing the old chaperone. Some young man met a pretty young maid, Andando in Old Barcelona. That's all they did, cause she had an old chaperone, a chrome. Yes, she had an old chaperone. Well, the girl noticed Pedro Chaperone means Auntie in Spain. She may have an eye. Pedro, she was a big pain. As the aunties, they sparkle and show home. The aunties means teeth, and that's just where it liked to have kicked the old chaperone. Father, some old chaperone. He said, the old chaperone, you're fluttering like a paloma. Now paloma's a bird, and that's just what he gave her. And then he bit so much like siesta, he just stayed home and snored. They danced and they sang in the plaza. Now plaza means square, but nobody there was as square as the old chaperone. For she left the two lovers alone. They respectfully thanked the old chrome. They said, gracias, old chaperone. A very special tip on hair appeal, girls, from famous beauty authority, A.K. Dumont. Lovely hair shining with natural highlights and shadows, sparkling with silken softness, inviting with clean fragrance. That's the natural hair appeal that men prefer. And now such natural hair appeal can be yours with one touch of magic, luster cream shampoo. Not a soap, not a liquid. Luster cream shampoo is an amazing new dainty cream that whips up like magic in harder soft water into a mild gentle lather that sweeps dullness away. Out of her wealth of cosmetic lore, K. Dumont blended gentle lanolin with special secret ingredients to achieve this delightful new cream that leaves your hair so easy to manage, so soft and shining with the natural appeal that men love. Ask for the economical dollar jar of luster cream shampoo at your cosmetic counter, also 30 cent and 55 cent sizes. Discover the secret that women and girls of all ages are learning everywhere. There's a world of glamour in each dainty jar of luster cream, the cream shampoo for true hair loveliness. Well, it's breakfast time as we look in now at the Anderson boarding house in Weaverville where our young hero Dennis Day rooms. So far, Mr. and Mrs. Anderson are the only ones at the table and, as usual, Mrs. Anderson is laying down the law to her cuter half in no uncertain terms. Something's got to be done, Herbert. Do you understand me? Yes, snuggle buddy. Mildred's almost 22 years old. She should have been married long ago, like every other girl in this town. But she's practically engaged, whoopsie. And I'm sure that the very day Dennis is making enough money to support a wife. Dennis? Yes, I can picture it now. How happy Mildred will be as they wheel her to the altar. Now it may not take as long as you think. Didn't Mr. Willoughby promise to give Dennis a raise as soon as he becomes a help in the business? Exactly. You see how hopeless it is? Well, the boy just hasn't found himself. That's all, poopsie. It's the truth. Maybe if we stopped criticizing him and helped him plan his future, he'd... Morning, Mrs. Anderson. Mr. Anderson. Is something wrong? You look kind of depressed. We were discussing you. Oh, I see. Dennis, my boy, have you ever tried to find yourself? I know, sir. I always know where I am. I was referring to your future son. My future? You may as well know right now that we don't like long engagements in this family, Dennis. If you and Mildred want to be married in the near future, it's up to you to make something of yourself. Yes, ma'am. Can you suggest something I could make? No, I can't think of a single thing. We're just trying to put you on the right track, my boy. You've got confidence in yourself, haven't you? No, sir. Well, at least you can go to your boss and tell him that you've got to have a chance for advancement or else, can't you? No, sir. Dennis, where's your courage? Same place as my confidence. Oh, it's hopeless, Herbert. Hopeless. Come along. No, wait, dear. Wait, nothing. There are some men in this world who are really men who can do a man's job. There are others who are incapable of it. But, dear... I said, come along, Herbert. You still have the upstairs to clean and the ironing to do. Very well, Lotus Leaf. Morning, Mother. Daddy. Good morning, Mildred. Come along, Herbert. Were you and the folks having a talk, Dennis? Yeah. Your mother has finally come to the conclusion that I couldn't possibly be a success at anything I tried. Why, where on earth did she get such a crazy idea? I think it was from observing me constantly at close range. Well, of all the nonsense, don't you believe it, Dennis? They've said things like that about all great men. Honest? Of course. They said Thomas Edison would never amount to anything, didn't they? Then one day he invented the electric light. You can do the same thing. Wouldn't it be kind of silly when you can buy them so cheap? Isn't what I mean. Going to your boss, Mr. Willoughby, and telling him off good. Oh, golly, Mildred, I... Dennis, say, if you don't find the courage to do it this very day, I'll never speak to you again. Mildred, you don't mean that. I certainly do. Well, I'll try, but don't be surprised if I come home tonight and hand you a book on sign language. Dennis, is that... Why, John McNulty, how are you, John? Oh, pretty good, Willoughby. What are you doing down here, John? I thought you'd be over the state capitol, getting your party's election campaign started. Well, the race for mayor in this town looks a little tricky this year, Willoughby, so I came down to take charge. Oh, boy, honest, Jim wants to be re-elected, you know. He's still making payments on his yacht. John, how do you explain to the voters that the mayor can buy a $20,000 yacht on an $800 a year salary? We tell him he's very thrifty. Oh, that's it. Yeah. But you see, there's two strong parties this year, the Free Independent Citizens' Liberty Party, that's us crooks, and the Reform Party. The Reform Parties come out for lower taxes, better roads, higher pay for teachers, that sort of thing. Radicals, huh? Yeah. Oh, boy, honest, Jim may have a little trouble this year. Personally, I'd like to chuck the whole thing up and retire to my toll bridge. But it's for the good of the party. Well, you might be able to beat the Reform Party if you could split their vote. Split their vote by running an independent candidate, a dummy. He'll take votes away from the Reform Party, and honest, Jim, we'll walk in on your machine vote. Say, that's great. But where could we find a guy stupid enough to run for us? Well, uh... Well, uh, dopey enough to think he has a chance. A man so innocent that we can twist him around. Morning, Mr. Willoughby. Say... Short search, wasn't it? I beg your pardon, gentlemen? No, it's no good, Willoughby. I'm afraid he won't. Now, wait, you said you needed a man with certain qualifications. Well, Dennis... That's obvious, but there's a point where even the voters will draw the line. I beg your pardon, gentlemen? He could be built up with publicity, couldn't he? Well, anything's possible, of course. I guess two's company and three's a crowd. Goodbye. Dennis, come back here. Now, listen, my boy. I've always told you you could go somewhere, haven't I? Never in such a quiet voice before. Well, my boy, I've got a proposition that's gonna flaw you. How would you like to be the mayor of Weaverville? Mr. Willoughby, have you been browsing around among the medicinal alcohol again? Dennis, I'm serious. Quick, how many fingers am I holding up? No, stop that. Look, Melty, your troubles are over. This is your candidate for mayor right here. I think you're right, Willoughby. Gosh, they're both loaded. Now, let's look at this boy and see what he's got for politics. Well, he's a war veteran. Honest is the day is long. Not a black mark on his record. That doesn't mean a thing, Willoughby. He sings and plays the banjo. Mel, we're getting somewhere. My boy, go home and put on your best suit. You're calling on Senator Tom Harrington down at the hotel. Senator Harrington? But doesn't he usually support the reform party candidate? Well, that's just it. If we can get him to endorse Dennis this time, we've started the split. But if we want him to endorse Dennis, isn't it dangerous to let him see Dennis? All Dennis has to do is agree with everything the senator says. The senator will love him. I see. All right, Dennis, get going. Gee, you're serious about this then? You really want me to run for mayor? Of course we do, my boy. Gosh, Mr. Willoughby, this is the happiest day of my whole life. And if I'm elected, I promise you'll never regret it. I promise I'll make Weaverville a town to be proud of. I promise I'll... Gee, isn't it wonderful? I sound like a candidate already. Oh, Mildred, I got the most wonderful news. Remember how your mother said there was absolutely nothing I was equipped to do? So? So I've decided to become a politician. Yeah, I'm running for mayor. Have you gone crazy? How could you possibly... Dennis! Oh, so you don't believe me, Mildred. Well, here's my campaign manager, Mr. Willoughby. Dennis, you didn't take that seriously about running for mayor, did you? Don't you know who that man was in my store? Boss McNulty. Boss McNulty? Well, he's the crookedest politician in the state. Sure. I thought up that scheme to run those thieves out of town. Huh? McNulty doesn't want you to become mayor, Dennis. He's got his own candidate. Honest, Jim Dome. Well, that's a fine thing. And I was supposed to see this senator Harrington this afternoon and get his endorsement. Well, I won't go. Oh, yes, you will. We've changed my mind. I don't get it either. Don't you see? If Dennis insults this senator and ridicules all his policies, he'll come out for the reform candidate, the man McNulty's really afraid of. Gosh, Mildred, I gotta hand it to you. That head of yours is so heavy with brains it's the one you can keep your neck up. Thank you, Dennis. Mildred's right, Dennis. McNulty is beaten if you can get the senator really mad at you. You think you can? Are you kidding? People get mad at me when I'm not trying. When I am, I'll be sheer murder. That's right, senator. Candidate from air on the independent ticket. Ah, I see. Question of endorsement. Well, frankly, I lean a little toward the reform body. Good. I'll give you a push. You mean you don't want my endorsement? I've got enough handicaps now, pal. Look at you. Look at your policies. What about my policies? What about them? Fair. Haven't I taken a firm stand on the slum problem on the various... The slum problem? What have you done about it? You've been in office six years and you haven't put up a single slum. No, see here. Then aren't you the author of a bill to help juvenile delinquency? I am. How about that? Don't you think it's growing fast enough without any help from you? No, you listen here. Policies. Fair. Well, depends. What do you think of me? Well, you're certainly outspoken. As a matter of fact, I... I rather like you. Then I'm not through. For instance, you say you always fight for minority groups. I do. I'm laughing. I defy you to name one minority group I haven't fought for. Millionaires! And then you have the nerve to come out in favor of crime prevention. Why, you ought to be ashamed. Being in favor of crime prevention is bad? You know what a thing like that can lead to, don't you? What? Unemployed policemen. Oh, stop. Enough. Do you hate me? Well, no, of course not. Then you haven't had enough. Enough what? Oh, so now you're getting nosy, asking questions. The big senator. How many subcommittees are you on? Why, uh, five or six? Five or six? One senator? No wonder we have more subcommittees than we have subs. Dave, that's very funny. Oh, it was nothing really. Oh, you have a capital sense of humor. And to think that at first I thought you were serious. We couldn't return to that mood, huh? My boy, you certainly have a novel approach. You've got the reform party candidate last to the mast. I'll be proud to endorse you for mayor. Well, senator, you don't understand. I hate you. I hate your policies. Get mad, senator. By Joe, you're a card. And I think you'll make a darn good mayor, too. Goodbye, my boy. No, senator, no. Goodbye, goodbye. Good gosh, now what have I done? That's what I get for being tricky. Why don't I just act normal and let him feel for me what came naturally? Oh, where Mr. Day is. Look, lady, we go to press in an hour and I want an interview. But it's ridiculous. Mr. Day isn't running for mayor. Don't kid me. We got the tip right from John McNulty. I can't help what, miss... Oh, Dennis, at last, tell this man you're not running for mayor. I can't. What? We've got some pretty peculiar men running this country, Mildred. The senator likes me. Dennis, come into the den. Excuse us a minute, please, mister. Now, what is all this? Well, it's just like I said, the senator's gonna endorse me. I came up with all kinds of silly ideas, but they had no effect. But how could a man like the senator fail to recognize silly ideas when he heard them? I don't know. I guess he's been in Washington too long. Oh, Dennis, this is awful. That reporter wants a story from you, and once it's in the paper you... Wait a minute. You've got another idea I can tell. That scared feeling is coming over me again. Look, all you have to do is tell that reporter your platform. Where does that get me? Right out of the race, if you make it bad enough. Just tell him anything you can think of that's bad government. He'll print it, and that's the end of you for mayor. Hey, maybe you're right. I'll get right to work on it. You wanted to see me, son? Yeah, Mr. Day, I'm from the bugle. I came for an interview. Can we have your platform for mayor? You bet, son. First thing I'm going to do is open up the town. I beg pardon? I say this town's going to be wide open. Lotto, bingo, screen-o, penny matching. All foul vices like that. Oh, you don't say. Yep. Next I promise to close all the schools. That ought to swing the kid vote my way 100%. It's not bad. Of course, the kids can't vote. You're a technical triviality. I'm putting it down in your very own words here. Fine. Of course, I may ask you to initial it later. My editor thinks I drink. Well, if you don't, you better learn how. No, we're going to have an all the public drinking fountains when I'm there. What? Bourbon. Drinking fountains. Sure. A lot of our brave boys missed the lush war years, didn't they? Well, we're going to have a lush peacetime. A hold of paper for me, will you? I'm starting to shake it. Glad to, son. You know something, boy? You might be just screwy enough to get elected. Don't say that. Sure. Honest Jim and the reform candidates are, well, they're both dull as dishwater. With them cutting each other's throat to screwball like you has a wonderful chance. Gosh, your paper isn't going to support me, is it? No, no. And that's another sign in your favor. Oh, sure. My paper has a perfect record. We came out against George Washington and we've been hitting them that good ever since. Mildred, I need you. I know, I heard. What am I going to do? Every time I open my mouth, the votes pour in. Dennis, I've made up my mind. There's only one solution. Yeah, I guess you're right. Come on then, let's go. Okay. Hey, wait a minute. What's the solution? Why, we're going to win the election, silly. Oh, I'm sorry I didn't tell you, did I? No, and I was kind of interested. Win the election? Me? Certainly. The only one who can beat you is Mr. McNulty's candidate. Mr. McNulty pulled a dirty trick on you, didn't he? Well, we'll pull a dirtier one on him. Atta girl, what do we do? Suppose we've managed to get a picture of Mr. McNulty threatening you with a gun in his hand. With a gun in his hand? Yes. This is a dirty trick on Mr. McNulty? Picture appears he'll be out of the race. Suppose he decided to pull a trigger, it'll be a dead heat. Be empty, silly. You'll have it in your pocket. Then you'll pick a fight with him and let him take the gun away from you. And then what? I'll have that reporter outside the door with a camera. And as soon as we hear you say, you wouldn't dare, we burst in and snapped the picture. Holy smoke, I wouldn't have your mind for anything. You wouldn't dare the cue, huh? Yes. We'll get Daddy's old revolver out of his drawer. Oh, we can't miss, Dennis, and you'll be the next mayor. Will you do it? I suppose so. But you know something, Mildred. The only difference between my life and the pearls of Pauline is that Pauline was all sure of being around for the next episode. You're right, Jim. The kid's too strong with the press and the senator behind him. Yeah, let him be mayor for a year and hang himself. Next year, we'll be so strong they'll never get us out. Okay, Jim, that's it then. We'll withdraw. Yeah. So long, Jim. McNulty, I got news for you. I'm going out to win that election and make laughing stocks out of you and your stooge. Oh? Well, more power to you, my boy. Good luck. Oh, yeah? You and who else? Did you hear me? I said, good luck, my boy. Come outside and say that. Dave, you gone crazy? Oh, you want to fight, huh? Get your hands up in front of your face and keep them there. I'm going to hit you right in the stomach. What's the matter with you? Didn't you hear what I said? I wished you all... I heard what you said, you rat. Take that! I don't know, but that's what they always say. Let me call you a rat. If a fella said that to me, I'd shoot him. You would? Yes, sir. I'd take out my gun and shoot him. Well, I don't have a gun. It just so happens that I have. What? Here, why don't you grapple with me and take it away? Don't be silly. Go ahead. I grapple easy. Put that thing down, Dave. Oh, come on, old man. Let's play the game. Stop, will you? I dare you to take it away from me. I double-dare you. You wouldn't dare. Hold it. Hey, wait a minute. He's supposed to be holding the gun, not me. Oh, Dennis. Oh, boy, what a shot. Boy, candidate threatens rival political force. Wow, thanks, pal. I don't think you could lose this election, son, but it looks like you figured out a way. Yeah, that's me. Lucky mornings and normal afternoons. Oh, it wasn't your fault, Dennis. Well, it looks like we've got a cinch now. Our boy, Honest Jim, will walk in. Oh, yeah? Well, I'll fix him. He won't have a chance. And just how do you intend to beat him? He can't possibly win. I'm going out and campaign for him. Dennis Day will be back in just a moment with a song. But first, here's a fact worth knowing. A dental cream cleans your breath while it cleans your teeth. And just how important that is, our Colgate players are about to demonstrate. Seen a picnic, but it's no picnic for our hero. Listen. Cheap as Jenny. Every time I try to warm up to you lately, I get the cold shoulder. What gives, anyway? You mean you definitely don't know, Joe? Oh, Jenny, I haven't even got the makings of an idea. That's the trouble with your trouble, Joe. Ask your dentist, won't you? Please. And here's what Joe found out. Scientific tests prove that in seven out of ten cases, Colgate dental cream instantly stops unpleasing breath that originates in the mouth, and Colgate's safe polishing agent brings out the natural sparkle of your teeth, cleans them thoroughly and safely. Yes, Colgate dental cream cleans your breath while it cleans your teeth. And Colgate dental cream is famous for its wonderful wake-up flavor, too. Nationwide tests of leading toothpaste prove that Colgate's is preferred for flavor over other brands tested. So, to clean your teeth thoroughly and safely, for a wake-up flavor everyone enjoys, use Colgate dental cream. Remember, Colgate dental cream cleans your breath while it cleans your teeth. With Charles Dent and the orchestra, here's Dennis to sing, That's My Desire. Let the cream shampoo, the cream shampoo for true hair loveliness. Remember, doctors prove the palm olive plan brings two out of three women lovelier complexions in 14 days. And this beauty plan with palm olive soap was tested on women with all types of skin, dry, oily, even skin that was not clear. Yes, 36 doctors prove the 14-day palm olive plan improves all types of skin, brings fresher, brighter, younger-looking complexions. So, get palm olive soap and start your 14-day palm olive plan now. This is NBC, the National Broadcasting Company.